Life with Nat - EP128: Nagging with Auntie Linny #12 - The good old days. Or were they?!

Episode Date: June 25, 2025

Nat and Linny are nagging about the pros and cons of life - focusing on the pros of summer and the challenges of kids on phones. Please subscribe, follow, and leave a review. xxx You can find us in all places here; ⁠⁠https://podfollow.com/lifewithnat/view⁠⁠ INSTA: @natcass1 We're also on Facebook now too: ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/lifewithnatpod⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: ⁠⁠[e-mail]⁠⁠ SHOW INFO: Life with Nat - it’s me! Natalie Cassidy and I’ll be chatting away to family, friends and most importantly YOU. I want to pick people's brains on the subjects that I care about- whether that’s where all the odd socks go, weight and food or kids on phones. Each week I will be letting you into my life as i chat about my week, share my thoughts on the mundane happenings as well as the serious. I have grown up in the public eye and have never changed because of it. Life with Nat is the podcast for proper people. Come join the community. ♥️ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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You will. For what? It's a big dog. SAP Concur helps your business move forward faster. Learn more at concur.com. This episode is brought to you by Square. You're not just running a restaurant, you're building something big, and Square's there for all of it. Giving your customers more ways to order,

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it Thursday, it's Tuesday. I'm with Auntie Lynnie, how are you darling? I'm good, hi everyone. We had a lovely day yesterday didn't we? It was so nice. Impromptu. Impromptu and always the best. Lovely. Obviously I had, I was going to say Alfie then, I kept calling him Alfie over the weekend. I had baby James all weekend, well since Thursday night. Just such lovely quality time with him. He's such a good boy. He's really a role model baby. It's incredible. But lovely for you to have him on your own.

Amazing. Had, yeah, slept early as the whole, three days, three nights. It was just a joy and lovely to come here yesterday and break up the day. But I feel like I blinked and the day had gone now. I know. Because I guess you're focusing on him and yeah, it was lovely. The days go so quickly with babies, don't they? Because everything's planned around them. And I love structure structure as you know.

That's the one thing because I thought I was going to be like, oh, you know, on my own the whole time there. But Friday, obviously, we were at Maria's anyway. So that was a day gone yesterday at yours. Had friends around on Saturday. But because you're and I'm getting up early, but I get up early anyway, but he wakes up at quarter past seven on average, what he did with me. But then your whole day's mapped out. As you say, 10 o''clock nap for an hour, have lunch, change his bottom, play for 10 minutes,

put him to bed again, two hour afternoon nap, wake up, change him, then he's got his tea at four o'clock, 4.30, get start bath time at half past five, it's just the day just goes on. But that's why he's happy. He's the most content. I know. I'm overwhelmed by it, if I'm honest. And that's taking nothing away from the other children. Maria reminds me that Alfie was equally the same, but we kind of missed some of it because of Covid. And I do remember Alfie being such a good boy, but I just can't believe how consistent

he is with his naps. I'd put him to bed at quarter past seven and you just put him down, none of this rocking him and doing all that. I'd give him a little tap and sing him a little lullaby then I'd come down and I'd be like oh wow I've got the whole of him for me. It's good isn't it? It's incredible. Long may it continue. I know as you said the terrible twos might have started in a year or so. They're gonna have fun when it does but no. They're going to have fun when it does, but no. And they're so lucky to have you. Just to be able to go away and just not think about it. I know. Such a lucky...

I know. It's because you've not had it. I've not had it now. I know. I know. I've told... We've said this story before. The one time your mum had the girls, my dad had Dominic, Dave and I went to Paris for our anniversary. When we got home, they were waiting on the doorstep. She wouldn't take the milk from the bottle, would she Maria? Oh, that was a wedding. No, we have had this conversation before.

Oh, we definitely had it. Anyway. All the listeners. Yeah. And yeah. And I've got, you know what I'm like. I'm not just having the baby. I'm potting around the house, doing what I've got to do. That's very good. And it's lovely doing it around there, it's lovely. I've got a cold sore come up. You are, no guys, Friday, we all went to Maria's, Roro,

because she had the pool out and the kids. I didn't go into any detail other than the fact that I was squeezing a pod in to do it on Monday with Mark, Sunday morning, because I was unable to speak Friday and Saturday. And I wasn't, what was I like? No, I'm telling you guys, me and Annalisa just looked at her as if to say,

oh my God, you look, you looked, you sounded, your demeanor was like, I don't know, you'd done 10 rounds with Mike Tyson. It is shocking. It's always so debilitating. So then today, let me tell you about my day today. So we've got up, I've taken Eliza to school, come home, and I promised Joni we're going shopping. So we've gone into Harlow, Earl and Dawes.

Oh, because Joni was off today again. Yeah, she had an inset day. Right. So we've gone in and it was really good actually. All quiet. Primark, H&M. Yeah, next, new look. Lovely, so she got some bits then. I feel like we've done her holiday today. Did you do all the wardrobes out? No, because I got home ready to do the wardrobes out. That was my day.

When I tell you I couldn't keep my eyes open, I had to lay down. You were having that trouble last night as well when Mark sent me a video of you and your brother on the sofa snoring whilst watching a film with Mark. Mark in the middle. On his own. I know we were up for a bit of a night of it and unfortunately we were just tired. I think the heat takes it out of you. Yeah of course it does. And they are long days. Yeah of course. So I just got home I was going to do all the heat takes it out of you. Yeah, of course it does. And they are long days. Yeah, of course. So I just got home, I was going to do all the wardrobes out and had to go to bed. You passed out.

But it's the anti-hysteroins and all that. Yeah, because they make you drowsy. It really is. I know it's a very negative one. Well, I listened to your pod with your brother, Tony, brother in law tone, and I was like, oh, just everything. The mosquito bites, the sunburn, the factor 50 sunblock, the hay fever. And I'm thinking... Negative, isn't it? It's just horrific.

I mean, I couldn't be more pungent, obviously. Let's have some positivity about the summer, Lynne. Yeah, I can't be the only person that loves the summer. There are lots of people, but yeah. You never get bitten? No. Never seen a bite on your body? I don't get bitten.

Well, you don't have a sniffle? No hay fever? No, no, never had hay fever. Don't know, can't even imagine what it's like. Never seen you burnt? Just go out in the sun and turn brown? No, yeah. Just love a bit of summer, don't you?

She likes me. And I like, no, I think maybe... Okay, one could argue, is it the Mediterranean skin? And maybe...because my dad was the same. I don't go tweety and sort of hear everyone going, oh my god, I've got a hay fever. No, but I don't feel like it is. Hey!

Alright, love? Alright, darling? You alright, babe? Hey! Alright love? Yeah. Lighters just walked in. Alright babe? Yeah. Um, did she... No, my pasta. Yes darling. Okay.

Ciao for now. Ciao for now. Ciao for now. She's like a female Kevin, isn't she? Yes. Uh huh. Yeah. She even looked like him.

Yeah she did, she did the impersonation of him. Wet hair. Yeah she did, she did impersonation of him. Wet hair, tracksuit. It's funny isn't it. No I've got to put a positive spin on it. I mean don't get me wrong the sleepless nights because of the heat is not great. Although being at Elia's and well you can't have your windows open, you get a breeze here. That doesn't happen where I... I can't have the windows.

No, you've heard him, hey? You need to just put yourself in an igloo or something. Perhaps I should move to, um, what do you reckon, North Pole? I mean, I love Christmas, so maybe that's where I'm destined to be. Maybe. But it's not just one thing with you. No, it's everything. It's everything. But I feel like that is the case. I think you either get none of it... Or you get it all. Or you, yeah, you're the type of person to get it all, the allergies, the bites, that is the case. I think you either get none of it. Or you get it all.

Or you're the type of person to get it all, the allergies, the bites. I remember getting out of a car, going to see my cousins in Rome. Elias jumped out of the car within 30 seconds of stepping out of the car. She'd been, like your brother Tony said, she had got attacked by mosquitoes, her entire leg. She must have had a thousand bites within like two minutes. Crazy. And I'm standing in the same spot as her and obviously I don't have sweet blood.

No. Well. There you go. But no, I mean, don't get me wrong, again, we're not geared up for it here, Natalie. The weather. No, but you can't be going... Our houses aren't. No, but who's got aircon? No, not really. Not

really. No, I am going to get it in this room. 100 people need it. It's already warm in here now and it's not the hottest today. And if I was to refurb home, you'd have it at least in a bedroom. Yeah, I'm not saying I'd have it anywhere else. No, that's right. Because downstairs is doable. Yeah, yeah. But our bedrooms, because of carpets and curtains and blinds and whereas abroad, all the rooms are so much bigger. Also the ceilings are so much... Yeah, everything's tiled. You don't have soft furnishings at windows, it shatters and the ceilings are high.

They're geared up, we're not, which is why we moan and groan about it. Well, would you moan and groan about this tonight or am I being... Oh, I couldn't wait to get you round here. I have washed 12 towels. We've had the paddling pull up yesterday, everyone in and out the water. Lovely. I've washed all the towels, dried all the towels, all of which need to go in the dryer because otherwise I can't hang my washing outside because of the hay fever. Oh. Yeah. So I've done all that. Four o'clock comes, half four. Joni and Mark get in the pool. They take the clean towels off the table that I've just washed. Out they go. Then he comes in. What I tell the girls all the time, which I'm teaching them, please when you're wet from the

paddling pool, don't just walk into the house. So it goes everywhere. He's backwards and forwards to the fridge. He comes up. I went, you're taking the piss out of me. He's up the stairs in the shorts dripping. Why don't you live a little? Live a little. So we've just got to just all walk about dripping wet.

I'm boring. I'm grumpy. I'm boring. Eliza was calling me boring. So I thought fuck the lot of you. Get on with it. And I've hung all the towels as you've just seen. Yeah I have.

Across the banister. I'm not washing them again. And who will put them away? I'll be putting them away. I've got four tea towels on my feet like slippers going around because there's water everywhere in the kitchen. I'm saying I've got a pod to do in a minute. Well maybe, maybe take that statement literally, sorry Mark, you know I'm always team Mark, and live a little. Do nothing. Do no housework. Just let it go to break and ruin. Well I've just been... Do no washing.

Well I've just done four twenty express washes because Eliza needs this for tomorrow, that's for tomorrow. Oh no, live a little. Tell her you're living a little. Live a little. Live a little. Don't worry about it. I mean it's easy for me to say because I couldn't do it. Put something else on tomorrow. And then there won't be anything to wear tomorrow because they'll run out, won't they? Live a little. Live a little. Don't worry about it. I mean, it's easy for me to say, but I couldn't do it. Put something else on tomorrow. And then there won't be anything to wear tomorrow because they'll run out, won't they?

Live a little. Yeah, but you can't do it, can you love? We've got it's not in us. Joni's just told me she's got athletics tomorrow. I mean, in fairness, obviously I've had an email about it. Missed it. Oh. We're at athletics tomorrow.

I need my PE kit. So I've just had to express wash that as well. It's never ending, isn't it? Yeah, and imagine if you'd been working today. Exactly right. Could have done it all earlier, but I decided to have a nap. So it's actually my fault. Oh, Nally.

But nevermind, there you go, there you go. So we have lots of messages tonight because I started it with Mark on Monday. Just talking about, I mean, it's such a huge subject. So we'll just touch on Monday, just talking about, I mean, it's such a huge subject, so we'll just touch on it, obviously, but it is one I think we could go back to in more detail. Just yesterday the summer, being outside, thinking about when I was little,

Maria used to come over for the six-week holidays, we used to entertain ourselves. There were no phones. We had a computer. We used to play games. But most of the time it was tents, pegs, Play-Doh, all of those things. And it made me just think about the screens, kids being indoors throughout the summer. No one goes out anymore because you're worried all the time. And we've had some really, really lovely responses. And I thought, I'm just going to play a few of these and then we can have a little chat.

Yeah, let's have a listen. Hi Nat, it's Sherry from Newcastle again. Just listen to episode 127 where you're discussing children being on screens more as opposed to playing outside. And is that due to our anxieties or do you think that the world is a scarier place? I think it's a little bit of a mixture. I think the world is a

scarier place than it was when we were kids. I was born 1985, I've just turned 40 this year and I do think that there's a lot more goes on than there was when we were kids but then I do think social media makes for a lot more way of everything that goes on. We've got a few local community groups on Facebook that I'm part of and if anything happens, people put it on there, which is good because it's like everyone's looking out for everyone,

but it does get your anxiety a little bit more heightened than it probably would be if you were just following say mainstream media where you hear about the odd thing going on. My children are 10, my son Marley, he's 10. My daughter Eva is almost 13 and they're not allowed to go anywhere without a parent. My daughter dances, so she does dance nearly every day of the week. Luckily she loves it, she's done it since she was three, so she gets her social time from that.

So I don't mind the screen time when she's at home because it's a good mix. Marley plays football, he obviously plays matches and trains a couple of times a week so he doesn't do as much as what Eva does so I do feel like Marley sometimes feels like he's missing out because some of his friends are allowed to go out and about without a parent but I just could never forgive myself if something happened to either of them. So I just think safety comes first. And I do try to take them places that are fun and give them that little bit of leeway whilst we're out and about.

Like we're living in a big park, that's got a skate park, a football court. So I might sit with some of the mothers and have like a cup of, whilst they're playing in the park. But I've got a tracking app on my phone and they've got to have the phone in the pocket, a zippy pocket with them at all times. So I know where they are and they've got to check

in like every five, ten minutes. But I just think I'd rather be safe then, sorry. But yeah, that's my opinion on it. I don't know what everyone else thinks, but yeah, you can't be too careful these days. Oh, thank you so much. Well, there's loads to unpick there, isn't there? Yeah. I was thinking about me. I let Eliza walk to school on her own in year six, but let's be honest, it's one road. Across the road, yeah. It's like when you're in a little village, everyone knows everyone. I do think it is relative to a degree as to where you live.

I completely agree. There's a lot of that. Oh, have you? Which doesn't mean to say that because you live in a little village, that nothing's going to happen. Or, you know, if you live in North London, it's 100% going to happen. But that is relative. I think what you said about, because of the villages, there's a sense of community. Community, of course. So people know who's kids where. about, because of the villages, there's a sense of community. Of course, it goes there. So people know who's kids where.

Who belongs to who. And you're not overwhelmed with people. You're not overwhelmed with cars. You think back to the days of you and Maria, as an example, and Elia and Dominic. You lived in Islington. We lived in Hertfordshire. My children played out.

I lived in a little cul-de-sac. Everybody's children played out. No one played in the gardens. Everybody played out. We had all grass verges at the front. You used to play when you used to come over. The kids would play at the front, as did I as a child. And they would all play out. And then when they needed the toilet, they'd come running in. And then when it was lunchtime, they'd come running in out and then when they needed the toilet they'd come running in and then when it was lunchtime they'd come running in and then when you'd bellow out and say come on you've got to get in now it's getting dark. You couldn't have done that at the same time in the same period you know when was that Natalie? Late 80s for me.

No. Yes so I was born 83. Oh yeah of course late 80s yeah exactly. I never. Late 80s or in the 90s. Would not have happened. You couldn't have done that then. I had a mate who lived in the new built flat. Do you remember the flat sort of built over the road? Yeah. Sorry, the houses over the road. Yeah. And I had a mate over there and but we, maybe I popped over there and started that a

little bit. Mum and dad didn't like it, but again that was secondary school age. Yeah, so again it is subject to, and even today, even in today's world, being what it is, I still believe that it's subject to where you live determines maybe how comfortable you are in maybe your child walking to school or going up to the corner shop with a friend or that's never gonna happen now in certain areas even where I am it's busy I wouldn't. But do we hear? Of course we do we hear everything now. We hear everything. I haven't been in Broxbourne all weekend. But you know everything. But I know everything that's gone on there. My god, they've had an active weekend with

dramas going on on a Friday and Saturday night. I wouldn't know that if it wasn't for social media. That's right. If it wasn't for being in a WhatsApp group that I'm in. I wouldn't know. So ignorance is bliss. That's what I'm saying. Maybe there were horrendous things going on. I'm sure. Around the areas that we're talking about where kids used to play out but no one knew about it.

No, I don't doubt it went on Natalie. But the trouble is we know now. And we're aware of it. We're aware, we're wiser and it- I cannot imagine Joni going out on her own now. Absolutely not. There are kids of our age that do. What, walking to shops? Walking about? No, just wouldn't happen in our world. We wouldn't allow it to happen. And also there is that thing about sometimes

some children a bit more streetwise. They are, yeah. Which maybe we're not helping our children. Well this is it, yeah. Because they we're not helping our children. Well, this is it, yeah. Because they're not going to be streetwise. I just feel like it's the knowledge we have now, the stuff we know of. I know. It's a difficult one, though. The roads, even down to the roads, the roads are busier. Driving to yours, I come from Westside, come from Hartford. Those roads,

people put their foot down because they're country lanes. And there's two children, the eldest couldn't have been more than 11, 10, the youngest probably 7, 8. They're walking along that road in the road because there are no pavement. I'm thinking crikey, that is so dangerous. And that's just with vehicles. That's not the fear of anything else. But maybe they're used to it and they walk it every day. And maybe they are. Maybe they are. It is very sad that we've got to this now where you're frightened to let your child even open a front door to a stranger. There's that as

well. You know, when they get to the age children where they're capable of opening the front door, you would never let your... I'm frightened of opening my... Someone knocks on my door and I'm not expecting anyone. I'm... Bit nervous. Yeah, completely. I look to check for my spy hole because I don't have a ring doorbell. Or look through the window. Yeah.

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from 1.74% and save up to $4,000. Conditions apply. Visit your GTA Volvo retailer or go to volvocars.ca for full details. This episode is brought to you by DZONE. For the first time ever, or go to VolvoCars.com slash fifa. That's DAZN.com slash fifa. Here's another one. Hi Nat, it's Kate from Berkshire here. I just wanted to get in touch regarding the anxiety

that comes along with kids making their way in the world. We've recently coined a phrase here which is pranxiety, which is a mixture of pride and anxiety, pride that they want to be independent and do these things, but anxiety that we feel at them being so independent. So for example, my daughter's currently 17, doing her A levels. She turns 18 in September. And for October half term, she has booked herself five nights in LA. To me, that's absolutely terrifying.

And I'm so full of anxiety, but for her, she's excited and can't wait to go off on this independent adventure. So it's kind of really hard to strike that balance between wanting to hold them back and then just letting them fly. Love the pod, love to you and Lenny. Take care. LYNETTE Thank you for that. I wanted to talk to you about that mostly because Maria went traveling and I just wondered how you felt because she was... MARIA Yeah, she was older though, 17, she feels so young.

Yeah. But I know people, it's like things evolved, don't they? 17 year olds are now like 25 year olds were back in the day. Yeah, I was full of absolute dread. Instead of thinking this is a fantastic opportunity, she's going to go travelling, she did Australia, the whole Singapore, all of that, Thailand. But I was so worried. She'd gone with a friend who hadn't been a lifelong friend. So I didn't really know her that well. Yeah, I was absolutely beside myself. But Facebook had just become a thing. And her friends, her close friends, school friends,

said to me, right, we're going to get you onto Facebook. And because again, phones then you didn't have what we've got now. They were just phones. That's right. Yeah. It wasn't how it is now where you can FaceTime and WhatsApp and all that. And her friends got me onto Facebook. That's how I'm on Facebook. Yes. Got me onto Facebook and they said, Linda, you will feel like you're with her. You can follow her journey because she'll be posting. And that was absolute lifesaver for me because I did feel like I was. So there you go, technology stepped in.

And that's where. And helped you. But that's where technology, that's the positive of Facebook. Absolutely. When it's used for the reason it should be used. So for me, that's how, that's why I'm on Facebook. Otherwise I used for the reason it should be used. So for me that's how well I'm on Facebook otherwise I wouldn't be on it.

But now you're not using it for those things you just go on there and it's... Now I'm on it, I mean I'm not on it much to be fair, but now I'm on it to keep in touch with people. It prompts you for people's birthdays. Remember I've got a family in Italy that it's impossible to be in touch with all of them by phone so you know when it's a birthday, you know, it just gives me, it connects me with my Italian family. That's for me the biggest positive of Facebook. That's why I'm on it.

But yeah, when Maria went traveling, but it was so good for her, Natalie, because it gave her independence. Oh, life. It made her appreciate home. And I'm so grateful because she's had an amazing experience because you're not gonna be able to do that when you've got a commitment. Of course you're not. Once you get a good job and a family. It's never gonna happen.

I've never ever done anything like that because I was working. Yeah because you worked from a very young age so fantastic for your daughter. I appreciate 17, feels terribly young. She will be fine. She'll have an amazing time. It's five days. It won't be long enough for her. She'll want to go back. And I'm sure she will go back. But a lovely experience for her. Absolutely. You have got to let them go to a degree.

There is a difference to them wanting to do something like this. That's Eliza in two years. No, it's fine. That's what I mean. When I heard that I thought oh my goodness Eliza's 15 in September so that's only two years away. And what you feel as well is they do think at 15 that they know it all or at 17 that they know it all and they don't know it all. No. It doesn't matter how mature they are especially girls, girls tend to mature far quicker than boys. They don't know it all but that doesn't matter how mature they are, especially girls, girls tend to mature far quicker than boys. They don't know it all. But that's why it's so important for

you to be able to let them go, spread their wings, have these experiences, but you do need to sit them down and say, look, but I do know best. So you've got to listen to me and you've got to be sensible and you've got to do X, Y and Z. But you know sometimes in life you learn by your mistakes. As long as they're safe. That's all you want. That's the important part. No harm. That's all we hope for, isn't it? We can't wrap them up in cotton wool. And if you do you rebel anyway. Absolutely. And then that has the adverse fit. So it's about having the right balance striking the balance isn't it? Completely yeah

Morning now it's Rachel in Lincolnshire this is the third time trying to record this for some reason I cannot make my recordings work this morning. Oh Rachel. About halfway through scraping the barrel with Mark and the kids, love listening to you all have a chat. I've just heard you ask about the screen time, kids outside etc. And I think it's a bit of a combination of us having more awareness, but also, yeah, just feeling like you can't let your children be as free as perhaps what we were in the 80s and 90s. I think we were very, very lucky.

I was born in 1980, so on the cusp of probably one of the last generations to have more freedom, not the technology, etc. So we live extremely rarely. We've got no neighbours for a couple of miles and no paths on the side of the street etc so our children have to be fetched and carried everywhere. I've got a nine-year-old and a 13-year-old and I did say to my husband that in a way I feel very lucky to live where we live and not feel the pressure of them wanting to go out and hang about on the street because I do think that's a bit intimidating sometimes

when you see big groups of teens hanging around. Sorry, this has gone on a bit long, but anyway, that's just my opinion and everybody to their own and do what works in your own house. Love you lots, love to Aunty Lynnie and all the girls. Bye. Thanks, Rach. So she's kind of reconfirmed what I've already said. It is subject to where you live as well. Like for them, they've got to take their children everywhere. Yeah. Country lane. Yeah. Similarly to where you live, Natalie, to a degree. So you kind of have an element

of control. To a degree, but there were times where I have allowed Eliza to have a wander with her friend, go for a walk. In the village? In the village. 12, have a little wander. But she's 15. No, but I'm talking about- I was working in a bank at 16.

No, I know, but I'm talking about, well, she's 14, she'll be 15 in September. But no, 11, 12, she'd say, can I go for a walk? But again, look at the Facebook groups, Vans pulling up, asking this. It's even now, I'm like, you're not walking around here anymore. You wouldn't know. I don't want her to.

She can go, she wants to go for a walk and then go into the pub and have a coffee or doing something, but not aimlessly wandering. But isn't that sad? It is sad. That they can't do that. Isn't that tragic? They can and probably nothing would happen. But going back to our first listener, her message, I would never forgive myself.

No, it's just awful. So what I say to Eliza is I know that it's boring, but all I'm trying to do is I'm trying to eliminate risk, is how I explain it to her. No, I get that, but you can't go through life like that. That's the problem. Well, while she's under my roof, I will eliminate as much risk as I can. She's going to next week, going to a concert, first concert with friends, albeit a little bit older than her. But they're going to be in Wembley Stadium. I think that's quite a big thing to be doing. But she needs to start doing that because she loves her music. I'm a little bit nervous about it because the thing is she doesn't realise. She'll start

going to these things. It's not her I'm worried about. You're worried about other people. Of course. Pissed up people, throwing glasses. Do you think Eliza is naive to this or do you think she's quite savvy? I think she's very, very grown up in some ways, but because she hasn't done those things or explored those things yet, I think she'll be pretty shocked once she goes. The crowds, how busy they are that you have to keep together. But she's got to learn that, she has to do that.

And again, I know it's just a small little thing, but that frightens me next week. No, I get it. I want her to have a really good time. And I loved concerts. Of course she's going to love music with us lot. So she needs to start doing that. It's just so different, isn't it? It's such an eye opener. Unless you're in it, you don't sort of see what it's like out there now with young people. No. It's just a completely different world.

Also, I think the young of today, the youth that I'm firstly in a classroom with at the moment doing my program. Of course. Spending time with 16, 17 year olds on a daily basis. They're all very lovely, sensible. None of them drink, none of them smoke. A lot of the gents, all of this, I don't know what they are now, is it Gen Z? A lot of that group are very health conscious. Right. Which are your generation.

They want to be at the gym all the time. Well that's good. They want to, again, it's a few, I'm surmising from a very small group, but they're not in parks getting hammered like we were. No, like you lot were, yeah. They're not. So they're going to sort of milkshake places because it's Instagrammable and they want to do their Instagram in the cool places. I just feel like it's all evolved.

There's got to be an element of you've got to trust that you've raised your children. Well enough to know what's right from wrong. Yeah, and Yeah and listen everyone they're all going to try their luck they're going to have a drink and they shouldn't have a drink they're going to do whatever. You've just got to hope that you've instilled in them that you know there's a cut off. Yeah don't don't overstep that. Yeah don't because yeah I mean you know I remember I can't remember which of the girls going to you know the local club back in the day, you had discos, didn't you? Yeah, of course. Clubs, they don't sort of exist.

And they used to do Paradise Park, didn't they? The under 18s. Yeah, all of that. Yeah, yeah. And I remember one of the girls saying that one of their friends had gone off and hadn't told them where she'd gone and the panic, this girl had obviously had one too many drinks and I don't know why, I can't recall what ended up happening, but she'd gone and the panic, this girl had obviously had one too many drinks and I don't know why I can't recall what ended up happening but she'd left the group and you know something they all knew that they should never do they should stick together.

So it happens, it happened then. You can't protect them from the big wide world. I know because they're in it. Because we're in it yeah. We are bloody in it. Because we're in it, yeah. We are bloody in it, aren't we? My thoughts are just when they're, you know, sort of Joni's age, yeah, they don't need to be walking the streets. Gone are the days where children can just play it out the front. Or when people say, oh, you know, they go out all day,

like you're saying, you wait for the street lamps to come on. They're idyllic times. I'm sorry, that's not... It's just gone. Those days. But equally, it's equally not healthy for them to be sitting indoors, in front of a TV, in front of an iPad, in front of a game console. It's just not. Tough jobs need tougher gear.

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Conditions apply. I've got a message here. Hang on, let me find it for you. Now, I hope Danielle doesn't mind my opinion on this, but I'm going to be honest, as I always am. She said, hello, Nat and Auntie Linnie. I was born in 1988 and I grew up in the 90s. We had the best snacks, the best music, the best TV shows.

I would love to take my kids to the 90s for the day. I have an 11-year-old daughter and a three-year-old little boy and them growing up in these times really scares me. If the Wi-Fi cuts off in our house, my daughter doesn't know what to do with herself, she physically shakes. Oh gosh. Now I read that and it really shocked me. Isn't it bad?

I'm sorry that happens Danielle, but that needs to be... Yeah, you've got to cut that Wi-Fi off a little bit more often so she sort of gets used to it. I've got it the same. Honestly, a journey turns around to me Danielle, she says, I'm bored, I don't know what to do. If you were to see the cupboards and the rooms in this house filled with things to do, crafts, tie dye, Lego, board games, then it's endless, isn't it? Oh, well yesterday, Saturday, trying to have a conversation. Oh, yeah, no, she don't let me speak. But if she's on the iPad for a lot of time, her

personality changes. I'm shocked how apparent that is because I've seen it in, you know, the grandchildren. Personality changes. I can't. It's incredible. I put the iPad at the back of my little scullery cupboard, as I like to call it. It's at the back. I've thrown it. What's it going to do? I can't bear it. She don't ask for it. Once it's gone, it's gone.

What does that mean? What happens? I don't actually understand. What happens? I wouldn't be able to tell you in detail, but I believe it is the blue lights just being encased in that tiny little world for a very long time. It's just not good for you. They'll all have medical, I'll say it to Elia all the time and then Lisa I said it yesterday, you won't have no problems with all this because it'll all have health warnings on it. They won't be allowed any of it till they're 16. Do you think? 100%. They won't have mobiles till they're 16. It is damaging to the brain.

Yeah, it's so damaging. And you're right, the personality change is so apparent, isn't it? So if I saw you take a glass of wine and then you were a complete cow to me, what would I be saying? I'd be saying I don't think you should do that. Yeah, so it's no different. And we're just giving it to them and letting them be cows and then giving it to them again. So I have to take that stand. I wish Eliza still didn't have a phone.

Do you? Yeah, I feel so annoyed with myself. But I think you did really well. I know, but I still gave in to what my value is about it. But then don't you see the positive of her having fun? I do, because I have to say with Eliza, I think because I left it, as long as I did, she's got her social media now, but she's not addicted to it.

She's not. She takes it, she leaves it. Her Snapchat is the thing but that is run by, or is it again, it's still a tech giant, I'm not saying it's better, but she's got her streaks and they all message on there, that's like their WhatsApp. But I mean, it's me and you can be overrun by WhatsApps, groups, this, that, we feel the pressure to get back to people, it's overwhelming. And they've got all that. It's just a lot for them. And it won't be the case. I promise you. We had a message here from lovely listener and friend of Mark's, friend of the pod, friend

of ours, Tim. And I have found this really interesting. Hi, Nathalie and Auntie Lily. I hope you are both well. Just obviously listening to the last Scrape in the Bound, it said about Auntie Lily's coming on. Any questions? Yeah, what's your personal view on children with smartphones? I think they should all be banned and we're very fortunate that my youngest Isaac is going up to middle school here in Dorset and they have sent an email out saying no smartphones bring a brick but don't bring a smartphone it interferes with education it's not good for them and I'm so pleased that someone is singing from the same bloody him she has made for a change

but just wanted your opinion I don't think they're great screen time needs to be limited we try our very best to limit it here and I'm just glad that the schools down here are starting to get the message because basically been beating me out against a brick wall and talking to a brick wall for so long. But yeah just fancied your opinion please. Thanks guys, bye bye. I love you Tim, you should have your own program. It's so jolly and brilliant all the time. Brilliant. Well I concur with Tim but just be clear, so when he says they should just have a brick, he means a phone that does, is a phone. An old phone.

An old phone. But I'm totally with him. Why are the schools allowing children to have? Well, I'm even shocked at Eliza's school. But every school, why? But it is, like I say, that are parts of the country, the tide is turning. You need everybody to do it, but that will happen But if I because they're setting a president they are but if I had it my way I'm so upset that that didn't happen in my time with Eliza because she was bullied. Yeah, it was Depressed. Yes. She was the only one without one you couldn't I couldn't do it to her anymore. But if it were a band, blanket, no one had one, I could have carried that on.

But Natalie, it's for me, it's no different to school uniforms. Oh yeah. Absolutely there has to be a school uniform. I never had a school uniform, it was hell on earth. There you go. Because then one child's going in with designer gear, another kid can't have the latest trainers. It's awful. You feel excluded.

You feel... But even down to your body shape, your weight, what you can wear, what you can't, it is awful not having a school uniform. I didn't have one at primary school or secondary school. Did you not? No. Wow. And again, so that's why we have school uniforms, for that reason, okay?

Yes. So why aren't they doing the same with these phones? Because it earns... Why are they allowing children... What? What? What. What for the school? Not the school, I'm talking about the tech giants. But okay, I get why they want it, but the schools shouldn't be allowing it. The schools should be saying they can have their phone, they get to school,

it goes in a box or whatever and they can... They do all that, but it's too many kids. It's too much to police they are not policemen they need to be teaching children it's mad you told us I have spoken to secondary school teachers they said I can't teach the class they're all on phones all day all day long so they're in a class and they're just on the phone no it's a problem you know again have to be careful what we say, I guess. I have an example, not going to mention any names, where the phone was the root of the problem. Yes. The individual didn't even know they were doing it.

Absolutely. Just scrolling all day long. It's so addictive. It's an addiction. And that's not good. That's not good for your mental health. That's not good for your education. Nothing. That's not good for your career. So until you are able, your brain is... But how do you detox? How do you detox from... You can't. If you've done it, you're screwed. You can't. So once you're in it... You're in it, you're in it. You can't, honestly, you can't... We're not in it, are we? Because we never grew up with them. Is that why we're not like it?

We're not. I am to a degree. I am to a degree. But I am very, very good now at putting my phone away. And yes, everyone will tell you downstairs, they do say, oh, you're on your phone. I genuinely am on my phone for a reason. But at our ages, adults that have phones,

not all granted, but the ages, adults that have phones, not all granted, but the majority of adults that have phones, as we've said before, it's your banking. It's your email. I do everything on it. It's your social media. It's everything. Everything. Shopping. It's your holiday. It's your, yeah, whatever you need to do, it's your ordering food, it's your booking a holiday. That's what we use. We're not on social media 24-7. No. It's a tool. It's a tool that does so much. But there are adults that are. It's an addictive thing.

No, no. But I just don't think we should be giving them... There are kids, there are 25% of 5-9 year olds have a phone in this country. Yes, crazy stuff. But that's why the schools, unfortunately, I know it can't be all on the teachers, I get that. But I think the schools have got play a massive part. Children go to school five days a week, Natalie, 30 plus hours a week. Huge part of their day. If they could eliminate those phones, that's already a big chunk of the week where they're

not having screen time. Absolutely. And that's what school should be. It's a place to learn, have a bit of fun. Why is that not happening? Well slowly but surely hopefully Lyn, slowly but surely. Hi Inak, just listened to Scraping the Barrel. I just thought I'd message in about the question about children and letting them loose, letting them run riot like we did in the 80s and 90s or whether we just keep them indoors for safety. Really interesting topic, something that me and my other half talk about quite a lot. I think it depends where you live. So for example,

we live in a lovely little farming village. We moved there specifically to not worry as much about that. We moved from a really busy town to a lovely little farming village. And now we do, we are fortunate that we have a friend of our little ones. My little one is eight. A class friend lives about five doors down and they hop along. We have a field at the back of us and they hop over their fence and either walk down to our garden and hop in our fence, our back garden, or vice versa. We feel that gives enough freedom with knowing they're in each

other's gardens. As far as going out in the village, they're probably not old enough anyway yet, so that hasn't really come about, but I'm sure it's going to play on my anxiety as the years go by over the next few years. But I always think it's better for them to get out there, get stuck in, get muddy fingers, you know, go exploring like you said, like in the blight and down the wells. So yeah, I think it's good for them. But obviously, as I say, I think it massively depends where you live, your setup and the dangers that are immediately around you, really. It's all very much, let's build what we think is best for them first, then let them go out with caution,

rather than just saying, oh well, chuck them outside anyway. That sort of thing. It's all about the parents providing that ahead of time, that caution, and planning it right, and then deciding what's best based on the area. Love you lots, thanks for the pods as always. Love them, love them, love them. And yeah, speak to you soon, bye. Yeah, she's spot on. She is, but I have to say it is spot on.

But what about people who live in the middle of London? I know, absolutely. Who are in flats and they haven't got that. No. You can't sometimes plan. But that's why it's all relative to where you live. It's all about finances as usual. Of course.

If you're in a city London, you've got two children who live in a flat and all their mates are going out. They're going out in a city London. So I get it, but I think we've got to really remember. But also what you have now probably more so than back in the day, it was around then, is all the things that children do now. Like Alfie, he's in Beaver, he's part of the Beavers. Yeah, of course. That's been around for ages, I think.

That has. But I'm saying there's so much they do. They don't just do Beavers, they do judo. No, you've got this. He does Beavers, he's got football. Of course. He's got drama school. Again, that is all finance. No, I know, it is Natalie.

It's all about your financial where you are. Some people are worrying about putting food on the table. They can't think about Friday's dinner, let alone send their kids to the clubs. At the same time, have they all got PlayStation 5s that cost 500 quid? I don't know. I don't know. It's a very big topic, isn't it? I just think it's such an interesting one that we can carry on.

If anyone's got other stories or questions about it, because we're all going through it together. Linda's done it. She's come out unscathed, so she's been very lucky. But now I've got that, with the grandchildren. You're going to have it again now. Yeah. Yeah.

Imagine how you're going to feel. And it's got, and I've been there, done it, as you say, with my children. But it was a different time. It was a different time. And even me as a child, I remember I street raped, I played out, I loved it. I don't remember, maybe, I don't know, I would love to talk to a police officer. And that's what you don't see now, you don't see a bobby on the beat. But back in the day you would and they'd send you home if you were...

I remember when Elia, I remember Elia being sent home because they had a thing, it was a section eight or a section 20 or something, where you couldn't be in more than a crowd of four people at any given time. Right, OK. All that's gone now. Yeah. Well, there's no staffing for it. There's no budget.

No, there's no policing, literally no policing. Again, a huge problem. Another reason why, yes, of course you want to keep your children indoors. And with that comes with the issues because... They need something to do, therefore they've got games, therefore they've got phones. They're not going to sit and read a book, are they Natalie? Not when you've got the latest computer games or the phones or the iPhone. Eliza doesn't read, I beg her to read.

Yeah, see all that. Mind you, I did think about that. I did not read books really. I found Adrian Mole and I loved it so much and there was three, four of those, whatever. A bit of Judy Blume and what have you. I wasn't an avid reader. I wasn't a bookworm, set at her age. I was sat in mum's magazine on phones for three hours a night to my mates, all night long, three hours. The whole night.

So it's no different. It's just it's evolved to different things. But however you feel, we mustn't feel guilty. I think as mums we beat ourselves up all the time. Mum's dad's whoever's looking after the kids. I think you parents have got it so hard now in comparison to even my generation. Because there's an element of freedom that's been lost. So you're constantly trying to fill the gaps

and with that comes time, effort, money. And time is a big one. Yeah there's never enough time now. What has happened to the world? There's no time. But is that our own fault? Because we're just trying to cram too much in. Is it our own doing? Another topic. Time's a definite topic that we'll do next. Should we do that next? Yeah, 100%. Let's do time. Yeah. Guys, time for me and Aunty Linnie. How do you spend your time? Do you have any extra time? Do you hate time? I mean, it's, let's do that. 07788 20 1919. I'll'll be recording one with Lynnie in the next couple of weeks. We've got a bank a couple because of holiday. So time will be the next one. And let's hope we can make some time to do it.

Oh, don't. Well, thank you. My pleasure. Thank you. Nice to see you. Lovely to see you. Everybody have a lovely weekend. I think it's going to be a nice one again. I think the weather's picking up. It's not going to be as hot as it's been, but it's going to be a lovely weekend. Yeah, dry and bright.

Let's enjoy it. You can. Yeah. You can sit indoors with the windows closed. With the dryer on. Got it. Oh, go. Right, I'll see you later.

See you guys. Bye, darling. Bye, bye, Lynn. Bye.