Life with Nat - EP17: The Weight Ep

Episode Date: June 16, 2024

Nat and Em chat to 2 listeners about weights and diet, body confidence and comparisons. WARNING - This means that there is quite a lot of frank discussion about disordered eating and the difficult mindset that that can trigger - please do skip this episode if this is something that could cause you any amount of harm. We're packing this topic away after this episode and the overall message we want to share is the need for us to all try to bring more love to ourselves and each other! ♥️ Please subscribe, follow, and leave a review. xxx Hosted by Natalie Cassidy. You can find us in all places here; https://podfollow.com/lifewithnat/view INSTA: @natcass1 A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] SHOW INFO: Life with Nat - it’s me! Natalie Cassidy and I’ll be chatting away to family, friends and most importantly YOU. I want to pick people's brains on the subjects that I care about- whether that’s where all the odd socks go, weight and food or kids on phones. Each week I will be letting you into my life as i chat about my week, share my thoughts on the mundane happenings as well as the serious. I have grown up in the public eye and have never changed because of it. Life with Nat is the podcast for proper people. Come join the community. ♥️ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello everybody. Happy Monday. How are you Em? I'm alright thanks, how are you? I am very very well thank you. I'm looking forward to today. Yeah. thanks how are you i am very very well thank you i'm looking forward to today yeah be nice to have a little chat so today i'm talking to bex uh for the listeners that are you know right from the beginning loyal listeners you'll know that bex who got stuck behind a tractor often drops us a little voice note or a message and i've got her today. She's joining us on a Zoom to chat about what we first connected about, which was weight. So we're going to have a good old chat to Bex.

And we are also talking to a lovely lady called Bex. Funny, isn't it, Em, that it's two Rebeccas today? We're going Bex to Bex on the guests. Oh, lovely. Yeah. Get the Rebeccas on. Rebecca and Bex are going to be the guests. Oh, very good. Lovely, yeah. Get the Rebecca's on. Rebecca and Bex are going to be joining me to have a little chat about their weight journey, shall we say. I don't like that, do you? That word

journey. I've been on a journey. Yeah, well, it encompasses quite a lot of what it is. It's like this is all the shit I've been through, of what it is. It's like this is all the shit I've been through, is what it means. Yeah. You know what I mean?

It's a journey. Oh, my God, it's a journey. It's just my journey. Life, isn't it? Got to talk to you quickly, going back to things that people eat by accident. Oh, yeah. I had quite a lot of people say, please don't mention toenails ever again.

However, Tracy... Get ready to gag. Oh, no. Tracy said... No, it's not too bad. Tracy said, my friend's elderly father was eating from a bowl of peanuts. Her husband put his hand in for a few

and bit down on something hard. He sloshed it around his mouth, wondering what it was and if it was a shell. Then he took it out to realise his elderly father-in-law had been eating the nuts, had bitten down on the same thing, but had put it back in the bowl.

It was his tooth. Why is that so gross? I wish everybody could see Emma's face. Oh, we've got the video. Oh, man, it's... Oh! Yeah, it's so weirdly gross, isn't it? Terrible.

Vianetta, Louise Turnbull says, thought of you today. She was on holiday in Anglesey. £4.35 for a Viennetta. She's taken a picture for me. She didn't buy it. She didn't buy it. But thank you, Louise.

I think, you know, it's good to keep up with the Viennetta pricings. It's a long-standing thing for us. Yeah, if you have to take out a small loan to get a Viennetta, I don't think it's worth it. I don't think it's worth it either.

Loads and loads and loads of messages and voice notes on napping. I'm so pleased that you're passionate about napping, whether you like it or whether you don't. We are doing a nap episode very, very shortly. So I'm really looking forward to that

Naps Naps Naps Naps I think I could do a whole podcast on napping by the sounds of it people are obsessed you could do one of those ASMR ones where you sort of just send people to sleep are you saying I'm boring? no I'm saying it needs a whole different podcast

where you purposely put that effort you know make that happen because oh i say this no one's falling asleep to this there probably are some people i'll tell you who didn't fall asleep listening to this elaine oh yes now i listened to your pod whilst on the treadmill today the easiest 5k in a long time keep it up girl loving the pod so thank you for that elaine another gym buddy another gym buddy yeah loads of people listen in the gym and every time i get a message like that makes me feel guilty i think why am i not in the gym well maybe we'll do it we can do an episode of you from the peloton we could could do that, yeah. Someone actually asked today if I could create a group on the Peloton called the Nataholics and we all do a ride together.

Oh, is that something they can do? Yeah, you can. You can start a group and everyone can join it and we could do a little ride together. So that might be a good idea for the future. Get us all in, you know, say, come on, 8pm ride. That'd be good. Might be a good idea.

Might be good. Oh, who's in the waiting room? She'll bring her in. Yeah, get her in. Bex number one, please. Hello. Hello. Hello.

Hello. Hi. Here we are. You weren't stuck behind a tractor today. Do you know what? I've been at home since 11 o'clock today. Fantastic. Look at you. Where are you? I'm, yeah, we live in a barn conversion and it's like, this is a mezzanine floor, like above the kitchen. So this is where my office and sewing area is. Oh, how lovely. I mean, yeah, I know you say it's lovely, but think of the cobwebs, please. Well, I don't know.

I think it balances out. It is lovely. It looks like we were about to have a feast with Henry VIII. It is a massive room, yeah. This room is like the massive lounge, diner, kitchen, all one big room. Oh, it's great but when we did it we had to have like three levels of scaffolding also to get to the top so I've now had to buy an extra long cobweb brush yeah I was about to say

the longest feather duster in the whole entire world they're great aren't they I've got an extendable one they go really yeah I think it goes to about eight meters oh bloody hell that is big yeah oh it's so nice to see your face thank you put a name to a face it's like when you listen to the radio isn't it if you haven't seen that person which is rare now because you know you know all the radio presenters but back in the day i used to have a you know vision of someone and then you'd see them and be like oh or if you worked in an office and you regularly talked to someone on the phone at Back in the day, I used to have a vision of someone and then you'd see them and be like, oh. Or if you worked in an office and you regularly talked to someone on the phone at another company and you sort of get a vision in your head of what they look like, don't you? Yeah, I've never worked in an office.

No, but that's what happens. Okay, fair enough. Thank you for joining me today, though, because obviously we connected over weight. And I haven't really touched on the subject yet no did you think of Davinia's um chat on Thursday yeah I loved it and I know she's very chatty isn't she and I really loved it but do you know what I loved is that you let her say her bits and do her thing because you know she was on Loose Women last week and it was like they didn't really let her say her bits and they obviously didn't have enough time, you know.

Right, OK. But it's a lot, isn't it? It's a lot of information. It is a lot of info, but it's the brilliant thing about podding because there's no rules. So people can have a chat for as long as they like, really. We did cut it down, though, Em, didn't we? Yeah, not a huge amount in the end, but yeah. Not a huge amount, but we had did cut it down though em didn't we yeah not a huge amount in the end

but yeah a huge amount but we had to cut it down i mean she loves a chat but she's so knowledgeable and a lot loads of people have liked it some people haven't because they said that i wasn't on enough but you can't please everybody and every ep's going to be different so what should we start with do we think where do we start with this huge conversation? Tell us about you, Bex. Yeah, okay. So always been, I don't know what the right word is, chubby. I was always a bigger girl in my class at school. As I grew up, my mum and dad would always say, oh, it's just puppy fat like they do you know oh your mum used to be like that and now look at her and you know um so I suppose I was always conscious of my weight all through my childhood maybe more so at high school um and then in my sort of teens when I left school I ballooned in weight um in my early 20s I was probably a size 26 trouser at my biggest

food was a comfort I think that is you know as you've got older I've kind of worked out in my head that it was a comfort and yeah it's an addiction I guess the same as any other addiction isn't it um and then I was very depressed in my early 20s but I I lost weight and then I got pregnant put on weight obviously with pregnancy so I've always been bigger I suppose once I had my son I kind of actually it's interesting because it was actually Michael Mosley that was the five the five two diet that finally did it for me yes yeah that's been so sad can we just say such really sad sad news I love his podcasts I like you know really knowledgeable yeah again kind man it's a real tragedy that yeah and I sort of think I tried you know all the all the well-known diets and I

remember being on holiday with my parents and my son was only about five months old I think and I remember reading the book the 5-2 diet book and I was like right when I get back from this holiday this is it this is the one and and it did it really worked for me um and I got down you know I lost weight I lost probably lost about six stone um wow yeah and then when I got married six years ago I was like the smallest I've ever been you know if you have a wedding it's always a target isn't it yeah having something to aim for definitely helps doesn't it um yeah and then um since then I've you know you always put on a bit of weight after that I'm not unhappy with my weight or where I am

but I still find that every day I look in the mirror and I still see that person from all that time ago I don't I don't see what other people see I think that's my main issue you know but I think we're all guilty of that aren't we people say oh you look lovely today I mean you do look lovely today thanks Nat we don't take that do we we? We go, oh, well, this whole thing, this is from here. You know, whatever it is, I find it very difficult to go, oh, thanks very much. Yeah, taking compliments is hard. I think I'm better at it as I get a bit older. But it's not natural, is it? No. It's not something that we learn. No.

It's told us that we're terrible people if we were you know if we're bragging we're bragging if we take it yeah we're bragging we're vain yeah do you know what i mean we're arrogant it away and and not yeah and not accept it and then and then yeah so much of self-worth is built on waiting for other people's validation yeah and i yeah it's so difficult to get to a place I feel like I don't I don't think I've ever still got to that place where I think I can look in the mirror and go yeah I look good today I find that very difficult I don't think I've ever no matter what way I've been thought I look really good today standing naked in a mirror and that I've been seven stone 12 and I've not fought that no it's awful in it see when I did my DVD

I lost four stone in three months and then I put it all back on again and more within less time yeah so that that was the uh straw that broke the camel's back for me doing that stupid dvd I mean you can't even have been eating were you actually even eating yeah no I was but it was very minimal very small um and you know it was a contract So I got paid 100 grand to do that DVD. So they say, we're going to give you a trainer, we're going to do this, do that, and you're going to get this lump of money, and you go, bloody hell, happy days.

Of course. But actually, as much as the DVD itself is a good DVD, you know, you sweat, it's a good workout. When I look back, doing that was the start of my issues with food because i never thought about it before then i was a very confident person i have to say i didn't have the worry of people people used to call me fat now all the time at school never bothered me really didn't i just used to bat it off and like you my mum and dad would say it's only puppy fat and everyone knows what i weighed i've been on the telly since 1993 i was 10 so i've never been a small girl i've

always been a bigger girl but yeah doing the dvd it was my choice it's my problem but it wasn't good mentally for me and i can honestly say i can don't i can put clothes on now i can get ready and go no i look nice i'm getting much better at that but i still don't have that confidence i'm going away i'm going on holiday soon and i still think oh i don't want to put a swimming costume on i don't want to do that but i need to get over that i need to get over that and uh yeah as i tell my children as i tell my daughters when they say oh you know eliza will say my legs mommy my legs you know she's 13 now she's approaching 14 lots of weight chat yeah you've got to be so careful with that as well genuinely people at school being rude to her calling her fat that sort of thing happening

yeah and she'll say oh my legs mummy do they look and I say you're very lucky to have legs yeah let's just enjoy having legs I mean my son's 11 and it's already happened and to him he's and he's 11 and he's a boy crazy isn't it it's crazy how have you dealt with that I've I'm really consciously careful um we talk a lot about nutrition and we talk a lot about eating to make us feel good and you know you have this food because this food's better for you as a person we do i try not and i know i'm sure you know he will see me going oh i look awful in this which is really dangerous isn't it you've got to be careful that's a really really big problem isn't it because i can go i can sit and say's a really, really big problem, isn't it? Because I can sit and go, I can sit and say, you're beautiful. Don't think like that. And then

she'll hear me go, you know, I'll be talking to someone and she'll probably hear me say, oh, you know, I'd like to shift a bit of weight and I feel like a po today. And she's hearing that. So I too, like you, are trying to be really, really aware of what I say around her because it really does resonate and it sticks with the kids, I think. Yeah, of course it does. Of course it does. And they don't get away from it nowadays, do they? There's so much, you know, touching back on kids

and, you know, all the stuff they're subjected to. They're much more aware, aren't they, at a younger age? Very much so, yeah. See, my mum was a feeder as well. I don't know about your mum, but my mum was a feeder as well I don't know about your mum but it was all my mum was a housewife very proud mother and housewife that was her job you know but food was the language of love in my house yeah I never ever I could go and get four or five bags of crisps of an evening no one would ever say well no don't have those no no my mum was a

bit different really my my dad my dad's side of the family have always been you know had to be more careful about their weight whereas my mum's quite small so I think my mum was always very conscious so my mum was always trying to control that really okay for us for our own sakes do you know what I mean but then you know once you've got your own money and you can buy your own food and you've got your own house you just do what you like don't you you know yeah yeah i don't listen like you said there's there's no right way no and i just think food is a huge issue for everybody but i love food same i said i love food it's one of the only addictions that you can't then avoid.

If you've got problems with food, you still need to eat. You still need to face that at every meal, is trying to figure out psychologically how you deal with it. It's so disordered. It's so triggering and tricky for people. But, yeah, we need to fuel ourselves to exist. What Davinia was saying the other day about she doesn't agree with stuff in moderation which I can you know totally you know listen to and that's fine but I am a believer surely everything in moderation is okay yeah but i find i find i can't just have one so if i so if i was

there was a big bar of dairy milk and i thought i'll just have two squares that's not going to happen right so for me it's easier to not have it at all no i understand that i've got a lot better i can have a cup of tea and think oh oh, I'm just going to have one biscuit. And I do that. However, I've learned, you know, that's not easy. But I do do that. Or I'll have a packet of crisps. You have to get over the scarcity, like hurdle of like, if I don't have it now, then I won't be allowed it later.

That is it, isn't it? Because that's what we've taught ourselves is that yeah we shouldn't have it anyway so if we get quickly and get it all done in one then we can be better tomorrow we can eat better tomorrow but if you know there's a lot of this sort of intuitive eating world where people sort of go into this thing where you can have whatever you want and then you you know you go through the the thing of eating way too much of everything. But it's trying to reset that balance where you can actually understand what you need. It is about having a balance and I do feel like I'm much more balanced these days, which I'm proud of.

But it has taken a long time. I too love the fasting stuff purely because I feel it works for me I'm not I never wake up overly hungry so therefore I usually go until lunchtime 12 o'clock one o'clock to eat yeah now some people would call that extreme people would say you should get up and you should have your breakfast yeah my friend Rachel is a midwife and she says you should get up and you should have your breakfast yeah my friend rachel is a midwife and she says you should eat before six o'clock for your digestion so everyone's got their own views of course they have yeah yeah yeah i've but yeah i've done that for so long now that it's second nature for me to wait till lunchtime yes you know i mean maybe if you're on holiday and

you're you know there's a breakfast and all that that's a bit different obviously but generally it is you know lunchtime for me and it doesn't I don't even think people go oh I don't know how you do that are you doing like restricted out daytime hours then as a I generally don't yeah I generally fast till at least 12 most days although there's another lady who's really interesting mindy pelz have you heard of her she's american lady and it's fast like a girl is her book and it's all about fasting in accordance with your hormonal cycle all right okay so some times of the month you're in what she calls a power phase so you can fast longer other times of the month like the week

before you shouldn't push your body because it links to raising your cortisol which is linked to what Davinia talks about yes so yeah but the week before you want to eat the world I want to eat everything yeah so what she talks about is giving your body the nutrients it needs that week and not beating yourself up about the fasting yes yeah because you're putting extra stress on your body at a time when it doesn't need that yeah it's interesting isn't it so interesting you know we've got so much more knowledge now haven't we about this kind of stuff a lot lot more knowledge, but also a lot of information to take in. Yeah. And a lot of it contradictory.

So I think it's really difficult. There's so many different things. Yeah. You don't really know what to believe and what to pick. And I think you've got to try and just see what works for you. That's exactly what I was going to say. It's what works for you, isn't it? Yeah.

I think so. And also the very, very simple thing is eat less move more yeah yeah yeah definitely is it yeah I mean the moving thing is also for me as well as you know obviously being good for you moving more in terms of you know your weight but for me mentally that is my thing you know yeah whenever I talk you, you're off to a class. You're doing your Pilates, you're doing this, you're doing that. Yeah. Four or five classes a week normally.

That's great. Yeah. Well, we've been doing a lot because we've got our local carnival this weekend in Dix and our fitness group do a presentation. So we've been doing a lot of rehearsing oh that's great yeah so that's a lot of a lot of empowerment women doing their thing it's all good what sort of presentation are you doing well it's a it's a dance fitness group so uh like a zumba yeah similar more a bit more cool than zumba i think but yeah but the theme for the carnival

is wild wild west so you know we're doing a there's a little bit of the old texas hold'em and stuff in there and yeah oh fab so it's going to be a lot of fun yeah cowboy hats galore so in a nutshell yeah you and i we like a bit of fasting yeah we think about what we're eating most days don't we yeah well all days but everything up for me everything in moderation and we've got to try and be happy about what we look like what we look like yeah i think that is the key i think it's the key for everybody yeah i heard a great phrase that a lot of parents are sort of giving to kids is your appearance is the least interesting thing about you oh that's good we attach our weight to our morality we attach our weight to our attractiveness it's and it shouldn't it doesn't matter like

it shouldn't matter and you can link back to stages of your life can't you oh that's when i was i was fat and you know you link it back to certain periods of time and and also let's remember can i just say how many times have you heard some and so down the road who's run four marathons drop dead yesterday i know or so and so's playing football and yeah yeah all of these medical issues hit people across all the all absolutely of course yeah i just think if you're eating good nutrition you know and you know as nat said bit of moderation here and there is it the 80 20 rule is that i'd go 80 20 yeah yeah it's 80 20 isn't it yeah because life you know you've got to have a bit of the 20 haven't you well you've got to go be able to go to a restaurant

and have a lovely evening out and not worry about what you're picking from a menu in my opinion otherwise there's no point what is the point what's the point of me going to work all week what's the point of you know you want to go on holiday and enjoy yourself but you don't need to eat seven ice creams a day do you yeah but when you're on when you're on holiday i think you should be able to have an ice cream every day yeah if you want one because you're on your holiday but when you get home you're not going to have an ice cream every day like you say i think the 80 20 rule is you know definitely even with meals i think well if i want to have a breakfast which is a bit indulgent because i'm going out for breakfast then i'll you know have a have a dinner with maybe which is a bit healthier

than i usually would it's just about using your brain a bit isn't it really? Yeah, agreed but ultimately being happy with what you see in the mirror that's the key isn't it? It is the key no matter what shape or size you are just try and be happy and try and feel grateful you know

oh well thank you so much Bex oh you're very welcome and I hope, did you so much, Bex. Oh, you're very welcome. And I hope, did you enjoy Chatterbix? Yeah, I've had Chatterbix on, I've had about three episodes in my ear today while I've been doing my housework. I've had the pub jokes.

Have you heard the pub jokes? Oh, I love, I've not heard the new one, but I love them so much. I've got a little treat for you coming up. Yeah? They're coming on here soon. I thought they might. That's very exciting. I'm very inviting them on so that's going to be fun see how they they enjoy my environment with the voice roles public yeah yeah it'll be good it'll be good

yeah it'll be good fun oh look have a lovely weekend won't you and you all right thanks very much guys enjoy your festival. Enjoy your dance. Will do. See you later. Speak soon. Bye, darling. Bye, darling. Get groceries delivered across the GTA from Real Canadian Superstore with PC Express.

Shop online for super prices and super savings. Try it today and get up to $75 in PC Optimum Points. Visit superstore.ca to get started. So nice to put a face to a name, isn't it, Rebex? It was lovely. We've got Rebecca now. Shall we let Rebecca into our Zoom? Let's bring her in.

Hello, Rebecca. Hello, darling. Hello, how are you now? I'm good. How are you? I'm great, thank you. Really good. So, Rebecca, when I got your messages yesterday, was it yesterday? It was, wasn't it? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I couldn't believe, you know, you put so much into one voice note, I thought I've got to unpick this. I've got to talk to you.

So I would love you to tell the listeners, you know, all the things you've been through. And if you don't mind me chipping in and asking you some questions along the way. All right, go on, start from the beginning. That's absolutely fine. So I'm 46 and I, so as a child, I'll go right back. So as a child, I was quite a skinny child,

like very slim, could pretty much eat what I wanted it's quite a little bit fussy never had any problems with my weight just ate what I wanted never had any repercussions um and then I got to about maybe 19 20 and I thought I was fat so that there my lifelong weight loss journey started right okay and how much did you weigh Rebecca would you say how much did I weigh then oh yeah when you thought you were fat nine stone wow yeah and how tall are you five five three so I had a mate who was really tiny she was seven stone and I wanted to be her size I wanted to be seven stone so the first diet I ever went on I this is it was I don't know don't advise any of your listeners to do this but I went and got slimming tablets and I was like I want to I want

to be seven stone so that was when it all started and that yeah, it's just been downhill. It was just, yeah, it went downhill from there, really. And that is so scary, isn't it? It's really scary to hear. And I'm sorry, sorry that you've been through all of that. And obviously you're still going through that because it's something that doesn't go away, does it? No, absolutely not. So yeah, it's from there, then my weight,

that's when I think if I'd have just left things alone and never bothered maybe I'd have been all right and I just would have stayed at a steady weight but once I started with the slimming tablets then my weight I just go on them you just can't sleep when you take them they're horrific um wouldn't be able to sleep come off them then I put on a load of weight because I've been not eating not sleeping and I put the weight on so then I started the journey like everyone was doing in the 90s weight watchers slimming world I was last night I sat I sat and actually wrote a list of all the diets I've been on and I can't remember all of them but one of the maddest ones in the 90s I used to work in a call center and this is obviously pre-internet pre-even email we just had like you know like an

old bit of paper and it's been photocopied about a thousand times and it was yeah it was a British Heart Foundation diet it wasn't from the British Heart Foundation they actually put a statement out saying this has got nothing to do with us don't do this diet are you about to say something about half a grapefruit and a boiled egg yeah Was there beetroot on it and tuna? I remember it. I remember that sort of diet. Everyone, like, it was just a little bit of paper. It was like a chain letter.

It had been around the whole of the UK. It was like, I'm sure there was like beetroot, tuna. It was disgusting. I think I managed like two i think i managed did you do did you do do you remember the cabbage diet cabbage soup yes yes i do loads of girls and now that's one i've never done loads of the girls i used to work with to it and they didn't stop farting and i was like i can't i can't be doing that and at the time I had this big thing where I just couldn't eat vegetables. So that's one that I haven't done.

But I counted like one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten different diets. And that was just what I could think of off the top of my head. Tell me, go on, name them for me. Just name them. I want to see if I've done them. Right. Slimming pills.

No. Weight watchers. Yes. Slimming pills. No. Weight watchers. Yes. Slimming world. No. Extreme calorie control. I suppose so. Yeah.

I think everyone's had a go at that. The British Heart Foundation diet that wasn't from them. I did herbal life. Yeah, I've done that. Juice. The juicing diet, which was the one where you just juice all the vegetables and all the fruit and all that yeah yeah i don't mind doing that for i do that every now and again but only for two or three days just to cleanse uh but i don't even know if i'd do that now because you do get absolutely starving after and you sort of yeah go off balance do you know

the one thing from that that's brilliant is the ginger shot i would people should all try that i think that's brilliant it's like you just get ginger and you just juice it with like an apple and some lemon i think and it's brilliant like if you're getting ill or it's so good ginger's just so good for you anyway ginger tea it's really really good you can you can buy ginger shots in the shops yeah yeah you can you get yeah get them those places so the juice diet and then I then had a gastric band so 2018 okay I had a gastric band um which I'll come back to that a bit more on that in a minute and then after the gastric band was gone I had I'd done the skinny jabs and an ozempic as well right okay I haven't done those yeah I mean I suppose we've got to be quite careful what we say about ozempic but um I would just say to anyone who's thinking of doing it just be really really careful and speak to your doctor because

um it left me with like mad heart palpitations and it really upsets you it upsets your stomach and all that as well so yeah i wouldn't i wouldn't advise it personally there's a lot of warnings coming out of mental health real yeah it can really really send people into the deepest saddest brain space yeah yeah what worries me about a zen pic and like this celebrity culture is all of the big stars, especially in America, they're all apparently, if you listen to what's on the internet and that, they're all apparently on a Zen pic. And there are a lot of people who you see have lost a lot of weight. Well, can I just say something about that? Let me butt in there, Rebecca.

Go on. Because on Facebook, and I think it's still circulating, I can't do anything about it. I need to try and do something about it. I just haven't had the time. I get a lot of messages from ladies saying, have you taken these pills? Because it is saying, it's advertising that I lost my weight through pills. So in terms of these stars or wherever they are or celebrities, I would imagine that it's made up, a lot of it. I don't know that for sure, but I am really, really angry when I get a message saying, I've just bought these pills because there's your face there. It's really, really sad.

They've done that with someone else as well. Someone else put a statement. They do it all the time with other people. Yeah. They really do. And they'll give like financial advice and pretend it's from Martin Lewis and it's not. Exactly. It's some massive scam. Yeah.

It's really dangerous and it's really annoying and very upsetting. Really upsetting. Yeah, I bet it is. Go back to the gastric ban because we can talk about everything else. But yes. So you had, I'm imagining you had a gastric band privately because no one in their right mind is going to give you one on the NHS because you weren't big enough no no I wasn't big enough and I think there are some bariatric surgeries that certain people over certain

thresholds can get on the NHS but I wasn't big enough so when I had my gastric band I think I was about I reckon I was about 14 stone-ish. So I had it February 2018. Went in, no problem. Went privately. It cost me six grand. My surgeon was amazing. I actually really liked my surgeon. He's a really nice guy.

And through that hospital, there was like a group. With me, I never got to the root of the problem. And the root of the problem was disordered eating and binge eating. And they were very clear that for that six grand, you've got the operation, but you also you got to see a psychiatrist. I saw a dietician, the support, and I had really, really good aftercare. So the support was great. And they basically say to you, look, you know, once you've had it, you can't eat what they

call slider foods. And slider foods are things like chocolate, cris chocolate crisps cheese things that will just slide through your band really easily and like you can't like take on all your calories through like say coca-cola or beer or wine or whatever because that the band won't control any of that anyway so had it in 2018, lost a lot of weight by even beginning of 2019, the weight was starting to go back on. And then it went back on. I went back up to even fatter than I had been before I had the band going. So 2020, just sort of halfway through lockdown, I was like, right, I had enough. Went back on another diet, complete calorie calorie control lost a load of weight again then by Christmas that year the wheels fell off started putting it all back on and then um then I just started getting bigger bigger bigger

went up to about 15 15 and a half stone and January last year, just after Christmas, just about time you're going back to work. For a few months before that, I'd had stomach problems, like pains in my stomach every time I ate. Didn't put the two together. And my best mate... I was just about to, sorry,

I was just about to say to you, so over this time, lockdown, everything, putting weight on, putting weight off, you've still got your gastric band. Is that correct? Yeah. Had my gastric band in for five years. Yeah.

So my best mate had one as well. I know a few people that have had bands still got your gastric band is that correct yeah had my gastric band in for five years yeah so my best mate had one as well after but i know a few people that have had bands and most of them all bar one actually if that's how i'm taken out so my best mate had one as only lasted i think less than a year hers had to come out in an emergency mine lasted all the way through to january 2023 so i'd been having that these weird pains in my stomach didn't really think anything of it spoke to my doctor they were like oh I think you've got an ulcer we need to refer you to have a camera down your throat big weight in this so I was waiting to have that procedure done January 23 came and started really small but I took like a bite of something or a sip of something and had this pain when I swallowed and that over the course of that was say I started on the Monday by the Thursday I couldn't even

swallow water and I was like oh oh shit this is really really bad so luckily like my my best mate kept saying to me it's your band it's definitely your band the doctor was saying um yeah doctor was saying it's all and also or something in your stomach anyway managed to get hold of my consultant on instagram and he was like look present yourself for a and e tomorrow i'm actually working a shift there at my local a and e which was really really handy and we'll sort you out got there waited absolutely ages which was fine they'd scan me and he was like i've looked at the scans it's not your band your band's fine go and get all the fluid taken out of it and

I said I've already had that done the band isn't fine so luckily he was he's a nice guy and he just said look do you want the band out and I was like yes please and he's like I will do everything I can to take this band out today um and then luckily by I think nine o'clock that night they took me down to theatre and as they were wheeling me down like the guys from theatre were obviously I'd worked a really long day and were a bit pissed off they were like oh it's normally only like life and limit this time of night and I was like yeah really sorry and this because the surgeon had basically said oh it's only a quick procedure we'll be in take it out like we'll sew it back up we'll be home in a couple of hours whatever next thing I know is I'm obviously coming out round in recovery and

the the theater nurses are saying that I'd it was like gone midnight so I'd been under for over three hours which is not expected for that not in the morning not the normal so in the in the morning when he came around to see me he basically said that the band was completely stuck to my liver he had to like dissect a bit of my liver I think away to get it to get it out and it was a really really tricky procedure and if it had been left for longer than a few weeks I'd have been in really serious really serious health problems so yeah it escalated into something really quite bad and the minute the minute I was as soon as I had a sip of water,

once it had gone, I was like, yeah, I'm fine. You're okay. Yeah. So that was last year? Yeah, so that was January last year. When you look back on that time and what you've been through with all of that, was it worth it?

Absolutely not. So how have you felt about moving forward without your band? Yeah. And how is your eating now? How are you feeling about everything? Yeah, moving forward without my band, I was so happy to get it gone because it wasn't benefiting me in any way. It was just when you've got a band, you sort of forget about it

and then you'll eat something normal or you might eat something too quickly and you'll have to throw up and food sort of gets stuck I was never a good I was never a good band patient you're supposed to like eat slowly not eat set and I was yeah I wasn't I wasn't very good I wasn't very well behaved with it because I used to just forget about it all the time so I was glad that the band was gone my relationship with food I would say last year progressively got worse so 2023 carried on putting on weight and then as I came into January this year I was like I came I went on holiday in the new year came back and I was like right this is it I was felt like you know when you hear about people that are like drug addicts or alcoholics and they're like I've actually hit rock bottom here like I've woke up on a park bench or something terrible has happened yes I feel like I hit my rock bottom come back

from an amazing holiday I've been to Barbados had a lovely time but I felt like complete shit I had a mouthful of ulcers I was then up to 15 and a half stone really fed up like only took pictures of myself on holiday like from there upwards you know yes classic a good friend of mine she had not for weight loss reasons but actually for other health reasons she'd started a keto diet well she basically explained it to me as I've just stopped eating sugar but obviously with sugar comes carbs so I was like in in the back of my mind I kept thinking this is this is the shit I need to get out because I am the biggest sugar addict ever so I would eat five six bars

of chocolates in a day I've I ate six easter eggs in a day once I was an absolute nightmare ate a whole jar of Nutella in one sitting that is a lot of chocolate that's a lot of chocolate I've had no cutoff point whatsoever like and I and I used to do it I was never like someone who would like gorge like loads of McDonald's or loads of that takeaway that I was never it was always always sugar always always chocolate was just my my thing in the back of my mind I'm thinking I don't want to be a type 2 diabetic my grandma was a type 2 diabetic and she had to have but she ended up having both her legs amputated bless her late like it was the end of her life and all of this is in my mind and I'm like right I've got to so when my mate Sarah told me what

she'd done I was like okay so that was in my back of my mind I think I need to do that and then towards the end of last year Eddie Abu burst on the scene he's all over Instagram and I kept following I think he's so funny I really really love him I kept seeing all his videos and I was like yeah this is what I need to do this is what I need to do so I thought right holiday get back literally came back on the Friday on that Monday I was right, getting on it, starting, starting keto. Now, my husband, who wasn't massively overweight, had baby put on a little bit of timber over Christmas and holiday. He was like, do you know what? I'm going to do it with you. Because he didn't necessarily have huge weight issues.

He's very, very tall. He's 6'4". Carried his weight very well. Never even had a little fat belly or anything. But he had like chronic migraines joint pains loads of little things he was like do you know what I need to cut out the sugar as well because we were both eating just you know if you said to 10 year old kids these hundred quid go to Sainsbury's what do you want to buy that was what our weekly shop used to

look like just sugar and crap and ice creams and yeah just mental stuff so we were like right so this is within sort of three days Stuart my husband is head aches had gone he felt immediately he felt a thousand times better he was like I cannot believe how much better I feel with me I didn't necessarily feel particularly yeah I felt better but I didn't feel particularly bad to you know things went like the ulcers went and all that went but for me it was always like the weight loss and weight loss and weight loss and weight loss that was what kept me kept me focused and then yeah within the first four weeks I dropped a stone and a half and I haven't looked back so neither of us have got any desire to ever go back to eating how we were eating before because

me for my weight my husband for what how bad he was feeling yeah and I just think I've got for me now my mindset is you've got to treat it like you're an alcoholic or a drug addict you can't go back so they keep treat it like recovery so that's kind of my mindset now, and it's worked brilliantly for me, and I would never go back to how I was. I think you look wonderful. Thank you. I think you are an example of what a lot of people go through, and I am sorry to hear what you've been through.

Thank you. But I think there is so much pressure from a very young age now yeah that we all all think about weight constantly absolutely yeah I also think you're very brave for talking about it so openly and honestly thank you honestly thank you and I really hope that this way that you've you know you're saying you've found the way you like to eat that's what I say to everybody. Not everything is for everyone, but you'll find your own thing that you feel comfortable with. And I'm really pleased that you've found that.

Yeah. People have got to find their own thing, got to find what works for them. We know what's good for the goose isn't good for the gander. Keto isn't for everybody. Some people look and think, Jesus Christ, that is far too extreme for me. But yeah, everyone needs to find what works for them but yeah I would probably if I hadn't lost this because

I'm now like three pound off of a four stone weight loss since January but if I hadn't I would have been too embarrassed to have spoke to you if I was how I was six months ago because even though I still have most of this story to tell you I would have yeah because there was so much shame and embarrassment like there's been so many times where like I've I've had a journey with infertility like done loads of IVF that didn't work and so it's always this very sore subject around pregnancy for me and people would always ask me if I was pregnant when I when I was like in that regain stage and putting on weight and that was probably one of the worst things that happens to me so so many so many times so many times so for me I think if you were just big and you've always been big there isn't I don't know I don't think it's as bad

as when you've been slim or been big been slim put it back on it's the putting back on again that I found the most shameful thing and really embarrassing on it's the putting back on again that I found the most shameful thing and really embarrassing and that's the bit that I used to really sort of hate myself the most for I did that because I lost four stone for a fitness dvd and then I put it all back yeah I remember feeling really ashamed of myself yeah but mine was plastered all over the magazines you know oh god you poor thing and you know i was thinking about this last night i was thinking about you the horrible things that they've you're so strong and it's i think for you it comes you've got a brilliant family and you're a strong person

but the shit that they've put in the press and all those nasty magazines with the circulation it's awful and you were so young when they were doing that to you yeah I was really young disgusting I don't I am very very sure I have to say I am very strong and people say oh you must have crumbled behind the haven't we I just don't give a shit I just have never given a shit about other people thank goodness i don't know where that comes from yeah it is just thank god yeah so i am i am very lucky but i do i do think it's it's really hard for everyone really this weight business it is and i just think for women who've got enough on their plate it's another thing it's another pressure that women have got to deal with on top of everything else and I think as we all get all

get a little bit older and everyone's talking more about menopause and perimenopause and all of that um I just think yeah that the healthy eating if you can go through your menopause with eating healthier and doing a bit of exercise especially a bit of like stuff where you're maybe using some weights or yeah some pilates or anything where you're keeping your muscles going it's that's right because we lose it's all about the muscle mass isn't it that we start losing now after kind of you know 40 40 odd and then you know yeah so it's about a little bit of weight strength strengthening yeah exactly you know eat good things just yeah eat things that are good for you

eat things that make you feel better not eating loads of it and just trying to be grateful is what I keep saying we've got to try and look in the mirror and say I'm so lucky to actually be looking in the mirror and to actually be here let's just celebrate that and I think that is very very important yeah absolutely it's all about mindset and as because things have been going well for me I've been thinking more about mindset and me and my husband having a conversation about this last night about positive thinking and you know it's every year you sort of approach your birthday and you think oh bloody hell look I, I'm going to be 47 this year. But you've got to think, well, do you know what?

I've got a friend of mine who died when we were 19. There's people who won't have the privilege of getting to that age. That's right. Yeah, it's really, really important to be grateful. Be grateful. Find the joy. Yeah, find the joy in the things that you love and try and not get too het up with all the food and diet stuff,

which sounds like you've been through a very, very long journey and a very long road. Yes, yes. A very long road. And I thank you for talking to me today. Really thank you, Rebecca. Oh, thank you. It's been a pleasure.

It's been an absolute pleasure. I hope you continue to feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. Oh, thank you. So do I. Keep in touch, won't you? Keep in touch. Yeah, absolutely. Oh, yeah.

I can let you know I'm getting on. All right, my darling. I want to lose another two stone. That's my goal. You really don't look like you need to do that but that's not for me to say I want to get my BMI to health to 25 I want to get it into the green and then I'll then I'll maintain let me tell you a secret my BMI when in green I look ridiculous I really I look emaciated I wouldn't pay too much attention to that.

I might be wrong. Listen, you can all say what you want. You can all have a go at me if you like, and doctors might write in to me and have a go at me. But I'm telling you now, when I got to a green BMI, I looked like a lollipop head. Oh, really? That's interesting.

Well, I won't let myself go lollipop. But I'm just saying, don't let yourself do it and don't put yourself under pressure you really do look beautiful oh thank you very much that's very very kind all right i better go oh it's lovely to meet you both take care really lovely to see you thanks rebecca bye darling bye what a lovely lovely lady Rebecca is but look lots and lots going on there and she's been through so much and she is still you know wanting to lose more aspiring to do more I'm not saying that's

wrong I'm not saying it's wrong there's no right or wrong I'm going away and I'm thinking oh I'd like to be you know I'd like six pounds off you know we all do these stupid things but we've just got to try and just give ourselves a bit of a break give ourselves a break and uh it's just a massive subject emma it's huge i don't even feel like we've we've done an hour and I don't feel like we've touched on anything yet yeah it's so tricky it's so woven into morality and worth and existence and expectations and and also comparison oh yeah is that comparison's the theft of joy I really want to talk about comparison for a minute

because I was talking... It's very interesting, right? Because I can be... I can be somewhere and feel a million dollars and not even think about my weight in certain situations and locations. Yet put me in another situation and location

with another set of people and I feel like the ugliest person in the room and I just want to go home. And that is where I'm comparing myself to other people. And that is me being 100% honest because I really don't care what other people think but that is me going, out of this room i'm the biggest

person here out of everyone in this room i'm the biggest and and you know that is not it's not good is it it's all of this is far more mental than it is physical definitely every all of this yeah all of the food or everything if we were just looking at these meat sack things that we we use to move ourselves around the world while you know our thoughts and feelings linger somewhere in the top ish bit of it yeah it's so mad it's so yeah and the comparison i've always been 99 at the time been the largest the friend group all of this and out out you know clothes shopping with friends i would always just be looking through shoes or bags or whatever and a friend would always be like oh i just i'm just such a whale at the moment. I was like, if you're a whale, then what am I? And you just go, you know, it's so tricky.

We're so, there's no subjectivity about it. There's no kind of being able to look at yourself in the mirror and kind of go, you know, there is no kind of comparison scale that I'm seeing myself as right now. That just doesn't exist. There's just no vacuum of we can just exist. It's tiring, isn't it? Isn't it so tiring? It is bloody tiring.

And I think there's a lot more in the world to do, which is why you've got to find joy in loads of stuff. That's why I love chatting to people, it's why I love my work, I love my family, you know, and I do, I get on the Peloton, I can really enjoy that when I'm not busy, I love going for walks with my friends, you know, if I go on holiday, I love to swim every day. It's just about living. Try and, you know, just, just let's all try and live. Eat, eat what we want, when we want, in moderation and just have fun and not really think about, you know, exactly what we look like and worry about what we look like

and compare ourselves to others. And I think if we can all just get up in the morning and think, oh, pleased to be here and not beat ourselves up about what we look like all the time or talk about other people and what they look like or compare ourselves, then maybe everyone would just be that little bit happier. The other thing for me about lifestyle, food, all of that, which I want to talk about very quickly, is we want to help them. We're going to work. We're earning money. We're worrying about finance. We're worrying about everybody else. Medical things might be going on. There is so many things to worry about. How can we then beat ourselves up if we haven't been to the gym

or I haven't been on the peloton? I haven't been on the peloton. I got on it the other day, first time in a month. I've been feeling really guilty about not doing that. Do you know, I haven't done it. I've been very, very busy and the hour that I would have to get on it, do you know what I want to do? I want to sit on the sofa. I want to sit on the sofa and put my feet up and I want to watch the telly. And I don't want to feel guilty about that. So try and not feel guilty about things because I tell you what guilt brings. Guilt brings having a packet of crisps because you feel guilty or guilt brings skipping a meal, which is really bad for you. So just try and not beat yourselves up because time is a very big factor in all this. And all of us are living lives now, which, you know,

there isn't enough minutes in the day. There's not enough hours in the day and there's not enough days in the week. So hopefully, slowly but surely, you can all work out a little timetable and you will have time to do things and you will have time to do things and you will have time to prepare meals but sometimes you're not going to have that time don't worry about it it's not a big deal we're not superhuman and try and remember that it's been really lovely to hear um bex and rebecca today two very different stories and i think every woman or man listening to this will have something to say in their own story but we're all different and that's that's the biggest biggest thing to take away from today everybody's different i can eat what i eat and

look like me you eat what you eat and you look like you. And that's it. Let's all just try and enjoy life, not compare ourselves to other people, which is very, very hard in this day and age. But let's try and have fun and have a laugh. Be around people that make you feel good. If you've got people around you that make you feel like shit cut them out your life and i know that's a bit extreme but i do mean it um cut them out and be around people that make you feel good and be confident and be as happy as you can because life isn't just about food and diet and weight and what we look like. It's about having fun, spending time with good people, hobbies, passions, great places, lovely stories.

So I really hope this episode has inspired you to become more confident. I'm sorry if it's upset you in any way because it may have. And what I'm going to do now is I'm packing away the weight chat. I'm going to pack it away and I'm not really going to talk about it anymore. So I do apologise for everybody who sends me voice notes and stories about weight but I think there's lots and lots of other good stuff to talk about and I'm sure we will touch on it another time but just so you know for now I'm packing it away have a fantastic week I shall speak to you on Thursday we're going to talk about napping speak to you later bye Every week me and Diane We're going to be having a little catch up On the back of Strictly Aren't we Di?

We are I've missed you Chris I've missed you too We're going to talk some nonsense So why not tune in Available everywhere you get your podcasts