Life with Nat - EP184: Scraping the Barrel #35 - The Betwixmas scone, or scone?

Episode Date: December 29, 2025

It's the calm between the Christmas storms in the Cassidy-Humphreys household and Nat, Marc, and Eliza have popped into the pod room to debrief Christmas so far, and brief on the rest to come. Enjoy! xx Please subscribe, follow, and leave a review. xxx You can find us in all places here; ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podfollow.com/lifewithnat/view⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ We're on Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/lifewithnatpod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Nat's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natcass1⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Neice's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natsnieces⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Tony's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@tonycass68⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Linny's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@auntielinny.lwn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ THE BIG CHRISTMAS LIVE SHOW 7th December ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠- claphamgrand.com/event/live-with-nat-at-christmas/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Book Club: November's book - All Together for Christmas by Sarah Morgan & December's book (optional extra for the speedy readers) - A Heart for Christmas: Advent Romance by Sophie Jomain Nat’s solo chats - any rants always welcome!  Scraping the Barrel - SCAN AND SHOP VIRGIN NO LONGER! Bonce vs list! - Are you a list maker? Always collecting for Nostalgia Fest! What’s brewing with the Nieces - are we all skipping the end of summer, all of autumn and going straight to Christmas - Nat’s door is! Group chat ettiquette & pranks. Nice Lorraines… get in touch! Advent calendars & gift recommendations v. welcome! Things we’re nagging with Linny about - More lateness stories and some cleaning questions, please! The Tony talks chatter - Keep your DIY questions coming, also open to some saucy two paragraph stories for Tony to read out at the Southend show - think cheeky postcards (both in tone and length)! Can we make Tony an influencer and get him any freebies?  TBC Cultural differences ep - inspired by Linny’s Mediterranean heritage and her & Ellia's Italian trip, we'd love to hear about the cultural differences you've noticed between the UK and basically ANYWHERE else!  A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[e-mail]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello and welcome to Life with Nat everybody. We hope you've had a fantastic Christmas and I'm here with Mark for a little post-scraping the barrel. How are you darling? Post-scraping the barrel. Yeah, you know what I mean, post-Christmas. Post Christmas? Yes, sorry. Yeah, I thought you were scraping the barrel with a post.

Oh, I see. That's why I imagined when you said that. Oh, yeah. Sorry, no. Like a trow or something. Or a ho? A hoe, yeah. Mm-hmm. Ho-ho-ho.

Ho-ho. Oh, it's been lovely, hasn't it? It's gone too quickly. I know, but we've got two more days of it. Today's going to be brilliant. The Humphry day, as I like to call it. The Humpf Day. The Humpfrey Day.

Humphrey's Day A lot of plain of words Do you know what it is I've got a lot on my mind Yes And Baba looks at things A roller on your mind A roller is on my bonts

Yeah Just for My hair is still wet Nice I've got to dry my hair I have no makeup on Yeah Family are hearing 40 minutes

No They're hearing 26 minutes Okay 1145 Well we can't But The listeners know We're not going to let them down

So they get what they get, and they're getting up out. No repeats here. Um, on Christmas Eve. Oh, here we go. What did you put out? I did put out. That, that is not... Okay. Sorry. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hang on, go on. Wind it back. Yeah. Our episodes go out on Mondays. Yes. And Thursdays. Yeah. I put the Christmas Eve Father Christmas episode out, which I'm going to do every year for new people that find the pod and don't know. know about it, pop it on there for their children. Okay.

Very, very different. You'll be doing it with this one, saying at least. Repeating it? Yeah. No. You'll be deleting it. Out of the ether. Before we talk about Christmas and the time we're having and what's going on,

we've got a little bit of correspondence to catch up with. We've got loads, but I don't think we've got time for it. Well, we haven't done an EPS since... The 4th of December. No. Why is that? You've had better people to use, basically. Yeah.

I suppose so. That isn't true. That is true. You haven't needed to scrape the barrel, per se. Message here, this is specifically for you, so let's play it. Oh, this is a message for Mark. I went to B&M on Saturday, and there were no baskets left for me to use. So I had my bag in my hand, and I did a mark, and I put all the things in my bag.

before I went to the till, oh my lord, Mark, I don't know how you do it. I felt as if I was stealing. And I felt like I had to tell everybody that I wasn't stealing. There were just no baskets there for me. And I got to the till and I said, I'm not stealing. There were just no baskets there for me. Oh, my lord, I don't know what it is, but I felt so guilty. I don't know how on earth you do it or used to do it because you don't do it anymore, do you?

But I think I'm going to have to get myself a tote bag of Natalie's that says, I'm not stealing. Because I felt like a proper thief. Oh, bless you. I'm so sorry. I popped that in very early on after our last episode, and I don't have your lovely name. But you're right. You need to get online, pop to the shop,

and get yourself a little tote bag. Oh, hello there. It's like something out of Doctor Who's walked in. Our Eliza has popped in. There was a silhouette. I knew you could make a comment. Because you've got a towel over your head. There was this strange shape of a person.

Wow. You came in. Mine of Stanley, next to the expensive recording equipment. Sorry. Mine are the chair. Sit yourself down. Gosh. I mean, how are you going to...

How are you going to... Well, that's not going to work, is it? No. Do you need headphones on? Do you know what? We've got so much correspondence to go through anyway. Why don't we just have a very quick chat with you? All right.

Everyone likes to hear from you. Well, firstly, can I just say about the lady's bag? Yes. So I do scan and shop these days. In fact, can I say hello to the lovely lady in Tesco's in Bishop Stalkford who works there? Oh yeah.

Who was very impressed with me doing my scanning and shopping. This was months ago. I dropped Eliza at school and she'd watched me and she came over and she said, I think I know who you are and I've noticed you're scanning and shopping and I just want to say I really enjoyed a podcast and I thought, how nice is that?

Wow, some recognised you. Yeah. Wow. How are you, darling you enjoying your Christmas? Yeah, brilliant. It's been so good. Yeah? Yeah. But what's nice is we've had Christmas Day, had a chilled out boxing day, and then two more days of...

Chaos. Yeah, it's lovely, isn't it? It is nice because then it carries on. Although I have to say, I didn't enjoy yesterday. No, I didn't. I didn't. It was nice to relax, but it's also kind of like, well, okay, Christmas is over now. It felt very quiet.

And now we're going back to Christmas. It's a bit like, why have we had a break? Although, we will thank ourselves for a break after the end of today, and then a big day to follow. Yeah, and it was good for me because I went for all my wardrobes. You did? Cleared everything out.

There is now a mountain of clothes in your bathroom. Yeah. Which you've said a summer clothes, but they don't look like that. So I just think you've got everything out that you don't wear and chucked it in your bathroom. No, right. So there are summer clothes,

and then there's some of your jumpers and T-shirts underneath. And then there's, I think, two coats. Okay. And then two jumpers that I'm not going to wear that you can have. Well, it's nice that you've been organised. yesterday and done a few bits in your bedroom. Well done you. Thanks.

What's been your highlight so far? I don't know, just the whole of Christmas Day. Christmas dinner was lovely and then afterwards sit and playing some games. Best Christmas dinner you've ever made that was. Yeah, for sure. 100%. It really was. It was...

Yeah. A lot to do with Elliot Grover's potatoes, I've got to say. Oh, they were outstanding. We've had lots of messages of listeners who have tried them. Oh, really? Yeah. I've had pictures of them called Christmas Eve night. Thank you for all your pictures and that have all loved them.

Brilliant. They've gone down well. Good tip that. Yeah, really good. I've done them for today. Yeah, I thought so. Wow. I saw them in the fridge. I went to get a turkey sandwich out and I thought, oh, potatoes.

It's just going to be a new thing now, then. You're going to start basically cooking two days before or a day before. I don't know if I would do it for every roast dinner. No. But if I have the time and there's going to be a load of people around, I absolutely will do that. Yeah, like when we have Elia and Maria and everyone over on a Sunday. Yeah, I would do the potatoes on Saturday. Or if we're having a chili, you could definitely do that for potato wedges.

for sure. Yeah, for sure. For sure. They would be so good. And barbecues. Yeah, no, you've got to do it. They'll be so good with chili. Got me very organised though.

You do, yeah. It's a little bit like when I did those sort of shopping, not shopping lists, the menus. The meal plans. If I was off for a week, I'd do a little plan. Yeah. And you'd have to sort of think about it. They do go down well. Yeah.

Tricky though. It's a hard work. I do agree with you as well about boxing day. Yeah. I feel like boxing day is. a day when you need to have people over. Yeah. It was a bit odd day. It was really weird. The TV schedule was a bit rubbish.

It wasn't much to watch. Agreed. Not a lot. All that was on was like called the midwife. We watched some of the big fat quiz of the year, which is always quite entertaining with Jimmy. Yeah, I was on the phone to Aster. Yeah. To be fair, you spent most of the day on the phone? I did. I was on the phone to a lot of people.

Catching up. Called Imogen. Called Astor. Call Kela. I understand. Fair enough. Just felt a bit quiet. Why would you want to talk to? to your parents

Oh I think the violin comes out No no no No I helped Joanie make The Yule log Just to pop it out there She did not do it

I did that She came in And she was so proud She'd done the Swiss role And everything She'd made it But It looked like something

That had been Prepared in some sort of artisan bakery It is really good Or like an MNS one Oh thank you I'm gonna chuck a picture up Thank you everyone

And Joney came out with it And said I've made this And I thought, how on earth? I mean, what's weird about it is a couple of days ago, she did make, on her own, completely on her own, some little scones. They were so good.

Yeah, they were really good. It's a bade. Skone. Skone. Don't start that. It's a scone. It's a scone. No, it's not.

A scone. Right, here we go. We've had this conversation on here before. No. A scone. Genuinely, Paul Hollywood. Oh, here we go. Oh, your mate, Paul.

No, it was Paul. Oh, when I was on the bake off. Because when I was on the bake off, my mate Paul had a chat with me about scones. Scone is a cake. Right. The scone is the thing that you have with the cream tea. A scone is a completely different thing, because that is a cake.

And who told you that? Paul Hollywood. I can't wait for the messages. Paul Hollywood. When did you have a chat with Paul Hollywood about that? The Bake-off? What, you happened to bring that up as a conversation, just in case you were on a podcast in five years time.

No, but you're on the bakers, aren't you? You're on the bake-off, so you're going to talk about baking. What else do you chat about? No idea. We talked about Jaffa cake and biscuit. Jaffa cake's a biscuit, though, because you put it in the biscuit tin. Jaffa cake is not a biscuit.

Yes, it is. It goes in the biscuit tin. I think it's a biscuit. No, it's a cake. If you put Jaffa cakes in a biscuit tin with digestives, finished over. Yeah, they're completely different. They go all soft, disgusting.

Remind me what poor Hollywood said when you kept producing the nice boards that somebody in your family had made for you to... Well, he asked where they came from, and I said my dad made it. made them and he said, well, your dad must be a very clever man. There you go. Still, possibly, the best praise I've ever received for anything.

They were lovely, those boards, though. They were. We still got them? Yeah. We've got them in there. I've still got the shark cutter as well. Yeah? Brilliant.

Oh, yeah, that piece of meth, that actual bespoke handmade shark cake cutter. Biscuit cutter, but yeah. Biscuit cutter. Sorry, a biscuit cutter at what, this long? It's bigger than that. No, it's massive. Is it? Yeah. Like that?

You've still got it? Yeah. Do you ever use it? Why are you laughing? When I think about the effort that I went to to help you with that, it was really good. It makes me happy. Do you see what I mean?

Why are you laughing? Because you can see it in his brain. See what in my brain? He is what? Genuinely, genuinely, I'm not even going to go there. It's been lovely seeing you. I'm sure everyone's pleased they've heard from you.

Hang on a minute. But Jenny and Nanny are going to be here in 14 minutes. So you need to go and hold the thought while we finish this. It's called entertaining. No, but it's rude that we're up here when... They're not here. No, 14 minutes they're here.

But you need to get ready. And if you believe that, you believe anything, they won't be here. They will. They won't. They won't. Nanny will need to stop her for a wheel or something. No.

That will not happen. They're here. Jenny's very, very good at times. Yes, she is. Anyway, there we go. Who's driving them? I would imagine James. Hi, Mark, you're eight.

Hello, are you driving? Hello. No, no, James is. I was just making sure I weren't on the speaker because little man's asleep. Oh. We're recording a podcast. Oh, hello.

And it's all, we're just a bit of panicky because we're... No, no, no, no. Let me talk to Auntie Jenny. Yeah. I said, Jen, I need to get this done, but it needs to be short because you're arriving at 1145. And your brother's like, oh, that's okay. I said, so everyone's going to just arrive.

and we're going to be upstairs. No, we're not going to do that. Oh, it's okay. Don't worry. It's fine. I'll probably have to feed him anyways. That's fine. There we go.

And how's the traffic been? It's all right. Yeah, we've got stuck at the bridge for 20 minutes. Right. But actually thereafter, it's actually been really good. So hopefully David and Claire's ETA will get a bit better as well. Lovely. Can't wait.

Well, Eliza's going to be downstairs manning the fort. So as soon as you arrive, make sure that you put your orders in for teas, coffee, whatever you might like. Me and Natalie will be upstairs for like another 10, 15 minutes. That's all right, isn't it? No problem, that's fine, yeah, that's no problem. It would be as quick as you can. Bye.

No problem. See you soon. Bye then. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye. Now, that face that you just pulled there, when you went, see soon, actually was like Adam Goodman was sat there from Friday night dinner. That was actually worrying. Who's Adam Goodman? Friday Goodman.

No, Adam, the son. Oh. The past face, you actually look, you just went, you went, see you see you. soon it was actually worrying you're like Adam and Joni's Martin she's decided to just walk about

in her knickers because she's hot I'll leave you both to her anyway and I wonder off you just ridicule me a bit more we're not ridiculed I don't have to be here for it no darling absolutely being ridiculed

not too ridiculed this holiday season your support can help CAMH transform mental health care. From now until December 31st, every donation will be tripled for three times the impact. That means your generous gift goes even further to help create a future where Canadians can get the help they need, when they need it, no matter who or where they are. Together, we can forge a better path for mental health. Make three times the impact with a donation

today at camh.ca slash holiday. Katie in Huddersfield said, Hi, Nat and Family. I hope you all had lovely Christmas. I have just booked tickets to the live pod in Leeds with my mum. She hasn't listened to your pod yet, but she's now going to start so she can catch up. Do you think she will catch up in time for March?

Really excited to come and see you all after being a listener from day one, Nat up north. Thank you, Katie. Lovely to see people are booking tickets over the festive periods. for next year's live shows, so thank you, I really appreciate it. I wonder if anyone has got tickets for your live show as a Christmas present.

That's a good question. So there's a question for everyone. Did anyone get tickets for a live show for Christmas? I've seen some jumpers and trolley tokens. Brilliant. And my book. Lovely. People have sent me those and said, best Christmas present ever.

I'm not sure if it is, because I think what Mark has brought me is the best Christmas present ever. Have we not spoken about that yet? Nope. Wow. Well. May I say as well, when I saw it, I thought, what on earth is that?

And then it clocked in my brain what it was. Because Daddy showed me about three or four weeks before. It is a very, very large flight case. Imagine something you would take on tour with you, if you were in a band, a great big, very heavy-duty silver box. It's not silver. It's green.

Well, not anymore. Sorry, excuse me. It's branded. It's now branded with the Life with Nat colours. Mark has made this box bespoke with the company. Spent a lot of time working it out. And when you open this large case, not only has it got lots of room for all of the things that we will need

for when we go to theatres for Life with Nat shows, It's got a microwave in it Perfect So we can heat up Some pasta, some microwave M&S meals And also branded glasses Branded cups It doesn't really pick up on those

And the front of the box Comes off and turns into a table Just in case I will do a video for everybody So you can see it But it really is the most thoughtful gift And just the life within that

sort of brand is growing. Yeah. And it's sort of an exciting start to 2026 having this new case. Next up, we need a van. We do need a van, yeah. Maybe Elio needs to get the life of nut on the front of the van. Yeah? It's funny, you should say that.

It's a good idea. It really is. Did you like your present? I did like my present. I'm very, very lucky. A little steam engine. So thank you for that. That is okay.

It's a special one though, isn't it? because you actually went on it when we went to Wales. Yep. So it's nice. It is. I haven't used it yet. It's been very good. But I'm looking forward to an opportunity.

I won't get one today, but it'll be nice to, you know, on a quiet day. Have a little steam up. I look forward to later when I'm taking videos of you outside fiddling with a train. But, yeah. Quite likely. Yeah. Yeah. It looks like you know that would be quite well.

Do you know what was funny yesterday, Joni was in a funny mood. And she came trotting into the kitchen. and sort of just casually, you weren't in the kitchen, but you had been. And Mummy had been sorting out some bacon and some bread, and she was going to do some bacon rolls for Joni. Yeah, they were banging. As Joni came in, she said, oh, I'm really hungry, Daddy, I really need something.

She looked around, saw the bacon packet, saw the bread rolls, and she said, oh, she just knows me so well. I carried up looking through the kitchen. And I thought, yeah, yeah, funnily enough, Joni, your mum does know you quite well but it just really made me laugh as she said it. Is that noise?

That's my tummy. Oh right. Oh wow. That was my tummy. So, okay, my family on their way now. Yep. Eliza's going to have to go downstairs and entertain. Absolutely.

What are we starting with? What happens first? It's very, very, I'm telling you, my brain's all over the place today. Bucks fizz, something to eat, what we're doing? I might go for one of your vodka cocktails. Okay. It might be worth you being able to say it first

just to prove it's how to take you to drink one. It's the food scenario today that's got me. So what are we doing? Well, David loves fish. And I always buy David some crab. Yeah. Because it's something that I did for your dad. Yes.

And I always have to, it's like a little something that reminds me of your dad and that I used to do for him and treat him. Okay. So I've bought some miniature crab shells for David. We have some lobster and prawn cocktails and some little salmon rolls. So what I might do is get the fish course out

see who wants a little bit of fish first and then I've got out my frozen bubble and squeak cakes which I'm going to fry we have ham your mum has done some pork Is this like on arrival or this is what we're having for? No, this is about two-ish But I don't think

I think we should have a large something early With the roast potatoes Get everything out like that And we have like a buffet-style plate Like we normally do But then by 8, 9 o'clock We can then get out some cheese Some patate otherwise nothing gets eaten

No I do like a buffet I reckon we should do that at about 6 or 7 o'clock What's that? Success What's that? I'm going to say goodbye to you now OK

Okay That's a shame Can you not just go Being Eliza could just hold the fault We could carry the whole podcast We need you We could do a little episode We actually could

We could actually start our own podcast Because we've got all the gear We'd be quite entertaining I have to say I don't think it'd be entertaining But we could be fun for us I think I should have a podcast We could have a word of Emma

We could do your own podcast All we've got to do is get a different neon sign. Just change that, to cross out Nat and put... I would need rent for using my equipment. Oh, okay. I'll start hiring you the cameras and stuff. No worries. Don't you why about that? You want to play a game?

Yeah. And we can change the colours as well. They'll kill me? Yeah, we can, yeah. Let's get a little DMX controller. Eliza. Oh, you're such a geek. No, I said that deliberately. Such a geek.

You've been very well behaved so far over Christmas. Very good. You're getting to a very good age. You're not grumpy at the moment. No, I'm not. You're not miserable. We even had a cuddle the other day. It's a really lovely...

When? Lovely age. You sat next to me and we had a little cuddle. When? Christmas night when I was asleep. No. He was sat watching videos of people cutting wood on Facebook. I was trying to watch Amanda, lad.

He sat there watching wood cutting videos, and you're sat there. I really enjoyed a mandelaide. So don't make that one up because I was actually conscious. Christmas Day morning, where I came in, I was a bit tired. I'd only had like a couple of hours of sleep because I went to bed at three. And you came in and he gave me a cuddle. Do not remember that.

You did. I enjoyed a mandaland. I did. I thought about it. There's been some mixed reviews, but it was very, very enjoyable. Mixed reviews from people that don't know that it's not Motherland anymore. No, but that's the thing. No, no, no, because people really love Amanda Land the series.

And they are different, but they are similar because of the characters. And don't get me wrong, you've got new characters in it. I think it was really good. I enjoyed it. I think people were getting their hopes up too high. That's the thing. It wasn't reaching people's expectations. But also, it's not Gavin and Stacey, is it?

No, but Motherland Christmas special 2019 I'd say that series series three episode one I now can say for my generation and my time being alive because there are a lot of brilliant

Christmas specials that I used to watch be it porridge, only falls all of those are brilliant but for my lifetime when I'm watching things that come out Motherland that Christmas special is my favourite

The first one It's my favourite The first Christmas special. Has there been anything on telly that you've both thought, right, you know, I really want to watch that? The Scarecrow's Wedding disappointed me. Yeah. Disappointment. Eliza, anything that you wanted to watch and you watch?

I mean, I can't think of one thing where I thought. I wanted to watch Eastenders. Yeah. How was that? But I haven't watched it for three weeks, so I was a bit like what's going on. But I understand it now. my favourite thing was watching a nutcracker ballet that we did two years ago

lovely, it's always a nice I've got to say... Oh yeah, and that's when you were in the kitchen and you went, I've just watched my nutcracker and mummy went, you what? Yeah, I did hear that. There is, I've got to say, the one thing I do get excited about still

is, it is very special for me when there's something on the telly that I had something to do with on Christmas day, I find that quite excited. Don't we know it? It goes on, we have to watch the credits. We did not have to watch the show. And then we were right.

Why can I say it? Oh, go, go. Okay. And then we rewind back. There we go. And we have to look. Oh, look, there's my name. Oh, hang on, let me go back.

Oh, I know him. Yeah, thank you. All right. Just like yesterday when we had EastEnders on. And you were like, oh, yeah, that's what I was talking about. Let's go back to the beginning now. Oh, I don't, again. Oh, mind you, that is an interesting thing to talk about what we saw in EastEnd.

It's a candle thing you wanted to talk about. Yes. Eliza, give us a kiss because we've got a bit of correspondence to do. Bye, everyone. Thank you. Merry Christmas. Good girl. You go and get yourself ready.

Everyone's now absolutely desperate. And they'll be here in a sec. For Elijah to come back again. Shut the door. This episode is brought to you by Square. You're not just running a restaurant. You're building something big. And Square's there for all of it.

Giving your customers more ways to order, whether that's in person with Square kiosk or online. Instant access to your sales, plus the funding you need to go even bigger. And real-time insights so you know what's working, what's not, and what's next. Because when you're doing big things, your tools should to. Visit square.ca to get started. I remember, and this is, was prompted by watching weirdly watching EastEnders last night and it appearing, we were talking about candles. Yes. I bought a load of candles. You did. Right. Whilst we were doing it, I thought, oh, I remember a thing.

When we were kids, and I know people quite like the nostalgia thing, when I was a kid, I remember my dad, I think he'd gone to Bookers and he'd randomly bought this thing. It was like two quid, and it was four little candles, and then the heat that came off the candles, made a thing spin around. Yes. Anyway, I just remembered this thing. This little gold.

I don't remember what it was. I didn't actually remember the actual thing. Yes. I sort of knew, and I thought, oh, I bet there's millions of those. Yeah. So I googled. It was the most ambiguous... That weird thing.

I just Googled his thing. And genuinely, there are millions of them. But the very first thing that came up is precisely... What you thought of. The one I was thinking of. And it was then on EastEnders. Yeah. That is weird.

Yes. It's funny how that happens, though, isn't it? Very strange coincidence that was. Very odd. Really strange. What's interesting is Dipique, the candle makers, have one of those. they have arrived, I can hear the car. Dip Teak, have one,

which is extortionately expensive, as you can imagine. Yeah. But I think that one's prettier, the one you showed me. It's a lot of money, though. It's not two quid from Bookers anymore. Oh, really? It's like 25 quid. It's not worth that.

And also, I remember it used to have the little bars that spun around and hit like a bell. So, yeah, all the time. We just take the bars off. Oh, yeah, fair enough. And this penguin. And the penguin game was on there. But, yeah.

I mean, that's, it's a strange. one as well because we had that one of those and used to come out of Christmas and then obviously I bought one randomly one year, long time ago when Eliza was little. Yes. And it's got nothing to do with Christmas. It's some penguins that climb up some ramps and go down. But penguins are Christmasy, aren't they?

Are they? Yeah. But it's all summery colours and it's a strange thing, but I associate that with Christmas. But weirdly, on EastEnders... There it was. Very strange, that. There you go. Very strange. I'm going to tell Kelly Bright about that, because we can gave a, we gave Kelly, um, our last one for the boys. Yeah. We did. Thank you also for my vacuum cleaner. You're welcome. A lot of people didn't think that was an actual vacuum cleaner. No,

well, there was a part of me, because you're very creative, there was a part of me thinking, okay, he's wrapped up a load of things to make it look like a vacuum cleaner. Right. But I needed a new one and I'm absolutely thrilled with it. And I have a few people actually sent me messages. I had quite a few saying I can't believe. I have been very spoiled. Don't worry. I didn't just get the Hoover in the flight box. Yeah, you've had a lot of presents. I've been very lucky. The reason, just to explain, because it's really as simple as this. So I bought the Hoover because Natalie wanted it. She even said which one she wanted. So it was really boring. Then the box deteriorated. I was never going to give you a, I can't give you a real. Sorry, hang on. The box

deteriorated. Got wet. No, it got wet outside. Yeah. Yeah. And then, so the box I had to throw away, so then I had to put the thing together, and then all of a sudden I've got a hoover-shaped object that needs to, and I thought, oh, do you know what? Wrap it up for a laugh. Because it is like a cartoon vacuum cleaner.

Yes. I'm going to wrap it up exactly as it is. I loved it. There you go. And I opened it Christmas Eve to use it, didn't I? It was my early present. A special little treat, yeah. Very, very good.

You enjoyed that, a little bit of hoovering. I did. And you even said, do a video. And I thought, how am I going to do that? Do a video of you hoovering. Why? It's really bad I would get people getting very annoyed

Oh, do you think so? Yes Well, I like hoovering, it's fine A, I've bought you a hoover B, then video and you using it Yeah, that's true It's not good, is it? No, fair enough

I've used it a lot actually The last couple of days You have, you've done Can I just say I couldn't do The Christmas we have without you What do you mean? I couldn't do it

In terms of Christmas Day when I'm doing all the food when I've worked very, very hard on the prep I've wrapped everything up for everybody I've shopped for everybody I don't think you could say that I've done much to be fair No, but what I'm saying is on the day

You are behind me and you just clear up You carry on What are you stopped talking for? Do that again What are you stopped for? Once we've eaten I don't get up You do everything

You clear everything I can do the washing up Yeah No I know But it's not just washing up It's all the saucepens It's all the trays You do all of that side of it

Then you're getting Everyone drinks all night And then in the morning I laid in bed I came down You'd washed all the floors Everything was clean It's the least I can do

You're like a little fairy But it is the least you can do Because I do a lot Yeah I think I'm right actually I thought I do it right But it's brilliant Yeah

And we've got another two days Of it now So Well this is where I'm just sort of bringing that up now because I really appreciate it. Right. So the timing. I really appreciate it.

The timing of this is interesting, isn't it? It is. We're about to have loads of people around today. And tomorrow. Quick turnaround tonight for tomorrow. Quick turnaround, massive. Right. Lots of prep, lots of food prep to do.

Tomorrow's going to be busy, isn't it? What are you doing tomorrow? Who's here tomorrow? We have David Linda, Maria Alfie, Ruby, Dominic, Annalisa, Amelia, Frankie, Eli, Jack and James. Brilliant. Big day. Basically, the audience of your Clapham show are there.

It'll be lovely. And the people in it, actually. It'll be lovely. I look forward to that day immensely. So it's all good. I really now, I have to say, people, I know it's a short one, but we've got Christmas Day number two to be getting on with in the Humphrey's household here.

So I hope you all have a really lovely betwixtmas. Did you know that? Yes? Very good, that, isn't it? From our friend Cat. That's something that Twix could use as a little bit of... I could do something about that, shouldn't they? They've not jumped on that.

I wonder if they have in the past? Not sure. But enjoy your betwixtmas. And we'll be back next Monday. I don't know what day it is. Next Monday? This goes out on Monday. Oh, yeah.

I don't know where we are. You'll be back on Thursday. I'll be back Thursday. Which is a week after Christmas. It's New Year's Day. Is it? Oh, my dad's birthday. How lovely.

Not sure yet. Going to have a little think about it. Your podcast had been going out on some big days. I mean, you did well. Big days. The Christmas Day one was good. Thank you. It's nice being able to hear the live show.

People have really, really enjoyed hearing it. I had a lovely message, actually. Let me find it. Whenever we do a podcast, your first payoff is always about 20 minutes before it finishes. Just something I noticed. It's not about Christmas. a good thing, because we've got more to talk about. Well, you always say goodbye, and then there's not enough

20 minutes. I know, it's my fault. I'm driving a log and I'll listen and I think, oh, blind me, there's still 20 minutes worth of stuff to listen to it. And you're saying goodbye. I know, I'll do it all the time. No, no, it's my... It's genuinely, I then lead you onto something. Hang on. We do it a lot. Hi, Nat. It's Kazia. I just want to say

a huge thank you to all of your lovely family. Thank you so much for sharing some of your clap and bits. it has made my day I'm in Australia or my family's in England so just listening to you and your family

on that Staging Clapham even though I can't see you I can picture you all there I've followed you from the very beginning on your pod I love all of you so much you're also different in so many different ways but you're all the same in so many different in so many ways sorry getting flustered

I just appreciate it so much being able to see you on the state Like, here you're on the stage, because obviously I'm too far away. I can't come to a show. So thank you. Thank you so much again. And maybe one day, who knows, I'll get to one. Take care.

Love you all. Thank you, Kaz. Is that lovely? Very lovely. It's nice that people have a little sneak peek and have a little listen. And while we've both remembered that we've got some correspondence to do before we finish this, Dominique Schofield sent me a really funny message. Go on.

Which made me laugh. Which was just listened to the pod this evening. and I love that Natalie pronounce my name as Domit Schofield from Brussels. Did I? Yes. It made me laugh.

I'm actually English and it's Dominic Schofield pronounced like the other Schofield who's on television. Not anymore. I had a laugh with the accent. Love the pod and thank you both mentioning me.

It really touched my heart. But I thought bless it. Did I say that, Domit Schofield? Well, it's her instinct. Instagram handle, you see. Oh. And so you could be forgiven. She's from Brussels.

Fair enough. You've done an act, but you did an accent. Sorry, Dominique. Dominic for it. It was funny, which I like. Oh, I'll get better, I'm sure. You know, we're a year and a half in and all that. Here's the 2026.

Maybe I can start speaking a little better and remembering what I'm going to say. That could help. Might help the pod. Thank you all so much. 077-88-19-19-19. Let us know if you've got any little bits and pieces you'd like us to touch on in the new year.

Don't really want to do your resolutions. You know that I'm not a fan. If you're a fan of me, you know I'm not a fan of them. But let me know. Any ideas you have, things you want us to talk about, you know that I'm here for you. And like I say, enjoy this little betwixtmas. But there's a message I'm going to play at the end,

and this is for everybody who don't sit around for betwixtmas. And I want you to know that I'm thinking of you all because you're all amazing. Have a little listen to this and I'll speak to you on Thursday. Bye. Thank you, Mark. Love you.

It's all right. Yeah, see ya. Love you. No worries, yeah. Yeah. No problem. I'll just give up my last hour. It's fine.

I love you. I love you. I love you. I'm only doing it to one up Tim. I know. I love you too. I do. Thank you so much.

Speak to you in a new year. Look forward to it. Hopefully talk to you off the pod in normal life. Uh, maybe We'll have a good day today We could do this fit though Do you know what we could do?

Go on We could do a thing, an experiment Might be interesting In the world of podcasting Sort of trying different things Yeah We should do a thing Where we don't speak to each other

For a month Unless it's on the podcast Unless it's being recorded As like a social experiment I don't think that would work I think it's a good idea you're only allowed to speak to me when we're doing the podcast

would it mean we might do more episodes maybe maybe not listen to this please sorry it's early I've just got to work for a 12 hour shift emergency services family here so yeah Christmas doesn't stop working

I had Christmas off yesterday but this is my first day back today I'm Macard oh my god is it a new moon coming up or something because i have not had one decent sleep this week and i've been off since monday i'm so tired and this morning i was even awake before my alarm but anyway i hope you have a lovely boxing day is days like this when i wish that i had booked it off but annual leave is precious and summer holidays requires booking off annual leave so yeah I'm big time regretting not booking it off now because I would just be slobbing today.

I hope you all had a lovely Christmas. Hope you all have a lovely boxing day and rest of the holidays. Yeah, I'm off to do a 12-hour shift for the next five days. Bye. And to all of you who are working in the emergency services, hospitals, care homes, I'm always thinking of you. I think you're marvellous. people. It's amazing. And this country wouldn't run without you. And also to all the home

carers that get forgotten about. Very, very important. And I hope you're all okay. I'm going to end, actually, on a very slurry message from one of our listeners, which is a little bit jolly and quite appropriate. Right. Now, I'm family. I'm several presecoes deep on Christmas morning. Listen to the pod. I'm so grateful and thankful that you've included some live snippets because I couldn't attend and I'm really enjoying it and it fills my heart because my family are from North London

and I feel like quite a lot of people from that time I've got similar values Boxing Day family always also can I just say I'm so proud of you and your family and of how far you've come with the pod and the community that you've built. Fuck me, I'm slurring, sorry.

But anyway, I'll try and keep it short. Love you. Well done. And Merry Christmas. One thing I'm going to say about that is it was about 12 o'clock on Christmas morning. So I'd like to hear, did any dinner get cooked? Were there any arguments? or did she fall asleep or collapse, what happened?

Because she was absolutely hammered very early doors. But I thank you for your message. Oh, brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. So you've had a bottle of Prosecco, and you think, I don't want to do. I want to do a WhatsApp message, that, really? It's brilliant. It is hilarious.

I'm on that note of Prosecco. Should we go? I'm going to go and crack a bottle open now. Fantastic. Love you. See you. Thanks all. Bye.