Life with Nat - EP213: Nagging with Auntie Linny #23 - Menopause chronicles

Episode Date: March 29, 2026

Nat and Linny are taking a deep dive into the murky mysterious waters of menopause. Why is it still such an unknown? And is there things we can learn from each other to make it less awful for the next generation of menopause sufferers? Lara Briden's book Hormone Repair Manual https://www.larabriden.com/hormone-repair-manual/ Enjoy!! xx Please subscribe, follow, and leave a review. xxx You can find us in all places here;⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podfollow.com/lifewithnat/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ We're on Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/lifewithnatpod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Nat's insta:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natcass1⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Marc's insta:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@camera_marc⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Niece's insta:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natsnieces⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Tony's insta:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@tonycass68⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Linny's insta:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@auntielinny.lwn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ MORE LIVE SHOWS! 10th May 2026 - The Grief Show with Auntie Linny - Studio, Chelmsford Theatre, Chelmsford - TICKETS 24th May 2026 - Hertford, Beam⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠SOLD OUT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Book Club: March's Book -⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Everyone In This Room Will Someday Be Dead by Emily Austin⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.amazon.co.uk/Everyone-This-Room-Will-Someday/dp/1838953752⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Nat’s solo chats - any rants always welcome. We're talking big career changes, the constant comparisons with others on social media... and the audacity of teenagers! Scraping the Barrel - SCAN AND SHOP VIRGIN NO LONGER! Bonce vs list! - Are you a list maker? Always collecting for Nostalgia Fest! What’s brewing with the Nieces - AGEING & non-negotiables Things we’re nagging with Linny about - More lateness stories and some cleaning questions, please! The Tony talks chatter - Keep your DIY questions coming. What are your favourite films & albums? What’s the show Tony’s going on about? And is there any way they'd legally be able to continue their holiday if that happened on the boat? Cold water swimmers and shower’ers… convince us A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[e-mail]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

All right, Lynne. I'm good, yeah? Yeah, very good. Excellent. Not too bad. Welcome to Life with Nat, everyone. We hope you've had a lovely weekend. New week, new start.

When this comes out, we would have been in Bristol. Yes. And I'm sure it would have been an absolutely fantastic time. Oh, as Leeds was on Sunday. Certainly was. Fantastic. We're just rocking and rolling with the old life hard time. It's been lovely, isn't it?

It's been lovely, because it's, It's been so nice to actually have a bit of quality. We have quality time in the car for four hour, four and a half hour journey. Although Natalie sleeps through most of it. I'll hasten to add. And so does Roe Roe Roe. So yeah, I'm talking to the cabby most of the time. No, really good.

Amazing, brilliant. And if Bristol, yeah, it's the last one, isn't it, until May? Yeah. And I'm sure that's going to be. Sold out. Yeah, fantastic. That's ironic that the last one has completely sold out. It's very good.

And there's loads of pod squatters. Pod squatters. So, yeah, it'd be good, really. I've loved them. I've so enjoyed it. I have as well. I really have. It's been really good fun.

Really good. More's to the point. I'm really excited for May because we've got two very special one live pods coming, haven't we? We have actually. And I'm so excited that we're doing the grief pod. I can't believe it. I feel like it's something that I would have had on my bucket list and I've just done it prematurely. Oh, so good that you feel that way.

I do, I really do. I just can't explain. I just think the amount of messages we have when we do the grief pods and how desperate people are to share their loss, share their grief and talk about it, not in a down way, but just to say how hard it is, how people are, how people grieve, that, yeah, we just said, didn't we? Oh, it would have been a travesty not to do it. Please, it's May the 10th, it's Chelmsford Theatre.

in the studio, so very intimate. And I don't want you to feel like, oh, I might not come because I might cry or I'm like this. We're all going to be in a room together. There'll be tissues. There'll be laughter. Absolutely. We'll just have the best afternoon. Yeah.

We're not going to make it more bit. No. Obviously, organically, it may be very sad because we're going to hopefully have a lot of audience interaction. Really hope so. Share their stories. It's not just about me and Natalie and our story. It's more importantly about the audience, isn't it? But it'll be lovely.

We can just talk about whatever we want to talk about. And it can be grief based on any form of loss, absolutely. Whether it's, as we've said before, a friend, a pet, a relationship, yourself. Yeah. Which is what we're going to touch on today. please come along it'll be brilliant wwww.

Lifewithnat.com the link's there to buy the tickets and I've got a feeling it might sell quickly so please get on there and buy your tickets

we're going to have a lovely afternoon Sunday May the 10th 2 o'clock Chelmsford so moving swiftly on was that my phone

that beat then I think it's terrible on the live show in Leeds as well is that Mark again no it's a banking statement which I'd rather not look at. My phone always used to be on silent because of filming.

Yes. permanently on silent. So now you like to have it on. Now I like to have it on. There you go. I'm rebelling. Yeah. God, you are living life.

Oh no. I'm living it up. I'm living it up. Oh, how's your week been anyway? It's been really good. Yeah? Yeah. Obviously, Pizant Natalie goes without saying.

But we were out on Wednesday night with all the girls. Lovely. Like my friends. Yeah, like Tina, who I walk with her sister, and then their daughter-in-laws and my daughters and Lisa. Yeah, it was really lovely, actually. It just went so quick. It's funny, isn't it?

You go out. We just couldn't. Couldn't get it all out. Just couldn't. And then, like, the waiters and waitresses are sort of hovering around us to say, it's half past ten. Yeah. Yeah.

No. It's a school night, I know. So, yeah. But I think they've all, the younger lot. have all organised a Sunday. It is so nice to do that girly night out. It's just such a tonic.

Yeah. What is that? Honestly, it was so lovely to see the girls, all you girls. I hope you're listening because many of them do listen to this. It was lovely spending time with you. I just didn't get to speak to many of them.

You just can't. And also, it's that arrangement of sitting somewhere like on a round table so you can actually see everyone and speak to everybody. Was it not? Was it rectal? No, it was originally, and we said,

can you squeeze us on the round table so that we can actually talk to one another, which they accommodated. It was lovely. It was nice. Where'd you go? We went to Artisan in Hoddysdom. Oh, right.

So local to everybody. Nice. Yeah, it was lovely. Really lovely. A laugh. What's that? A cafe or I've not been there? Oh, have you not?

No. They do cracking breakfasts in there. Oh, yeah. It was all tapassies. Picky bits. Yeah, picky bits. Haley ordered a loads of big ebit. Oh.

Oh, lovely. It was lovely. Oh, good. Yeah. Well, O'Doo. Nice. I need a night like that with my friends. Yeah, it's a tonic. Yeah, it really is. There's time, isn't it? Fitting it all in. Well, this has been booked in for months.

And unless you put something in a diary, even if it gets cancelled, rescheduled, but at least you've got that date booked. Yeah. Then you stand a chance of it happening. Especially when there's a big group of you because there's always, well, Elya couldn't come in the end because Jack didn't make it home in time. Yeah. Or they'll be ill nurse or.

or a kid will be ill or something will happen. Yeah. But it's a tonic because you just, it's a different conversation. It's a different evening to go out with your partners. It's just girly chat. Yeah, yeah. I love it.

It's lovely. I do like female company. Some women don't really do the female company. I like it. You don't? No, I do. I've got friends, but very small amount of friends. And I would say they're quite...

Not manly. They'll kill me for saying that. So, I'm half of them don't listen. I don't mean manly, but they're not, I don't know, they're not sort of girly girls.

No, I get it, yeah. I'm very comfortable with a group of men. Yeah. Going out and having a chat with lots of, at work, I gravitated to the male company. Funny, isn't it? I think I, yeah,

I think I can. Do a bit of both. I can. And we had, and Lisa's birthday yesterday, her mum posted, which was so nice. lots of children.

It's a whole different experience. We were like desperate to sit down and have a right old chinwake. So yeah, I've been really blessed this week, managed to catch up with a lot of friends because, yeah, I just don't see anyone. No, no, it's good. It is good.

So, you came up with the idea of having a little chat about perimenopause and menopause. Should I explain how that happened? Yes. So even though I had a late night, Wednesday, I was awake very early Thursday morning because guess what, I don't sleep a lot, which is really grating on me.

And I'm one of these people that unfortunately does everything you shouldn't when you wake up. Scroll through my social media, look at my online banking, to see how many rents have come in, check my emails. Then I put the telly on and I thought, I'll watch Eastenders because I didn't get to watch it. Yeah. And, yeah, watch the honey scene going to the GP because she thinks she's perimen. And I'm a pause, and Cyrus phoned Natalie, and said, now what are we talking about on Friday night, on our pod?

And she said, whatever you want to talk about. And this is how it's come about, guys. So basically on the back of me not being able to speak, sleep because of, I mean, I'd like to think I'm through it. But it just shows you just don't know. You just don't know. How do I know if I'm through it? I just don't think anybody knows much about it.

Yes, it's being spoken about. We know that Davina McCall started a huge thing when she did a documentary. Well, that's what resonated with me. Yeah. Because Honey's seen, she mentions Davina McCall. Did she? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right.

And so when I heard that, I was like, oh, it was like a bit of a light bulb moment. Because when I hurt my wrists, if you recall, I do. I went to the, and I never go to the doctors. Went to the doctors. And he sort of said, it's an injury? And I said, well, is it because I haven't taken HRT and my bones a week? And he said, well, it's probably not a health. helped, however, you know, it's an injury.

I said, well, I feel a bit aggrieved because I watched the Davina McCourt documentary last night. And obviously, she is a huge advocate of HRT. And obviously when I was sort of going through it, a bit of scaremongrim, wasn't here? Massively, Natalie. I would never in my wildest street. I mean, don't get me wrong. As you know, I've said it before, especially now having read all the text messages and voice

notes that have come through which we cannot thank you enough. So many. So many. We're not going to get through them. No, it's impossible. We will do the best we can. Yeah, I mean, guys, unbelievable. It's sort of, it's highlighted to me that I probably have sort of breezed it, having read

all those messages. I feel really blessed. But equally, it's, well, I've learned one lady has sent a message to say that one of the symptoms is a phantom. smell. Yes. And for the last six months, I've had this problem. Have you? Yeah. I think I mentioned it. Have I not mentioned it? No, I don't think you have. Oh, it's the worst thing. I thought it was COVID related again. I thought I've got COVID and I'm constantly finding myself sniffing. I thought it was Betsy, the dog. Yes. Yes. And then about a month ago it happened at work and I thought,

well, it's not the dog. What is this smell? I've said to your brother, Can you smell anything? He goes, no. And my sense of smell isn't as good as it used to be. But this phantom smell that I get is so prominent. It's a hundred. Yes. And when this lady put her message in today or yesterday saying one of the symptoms is phantom smell,

I thought, oh my goodness, that's what it is. So I must still be maybe getting little bits and pieces of it. Yeah, because I've never taken HRT, so mine's not been delayed. No, no. Of course not. But I guess I maybe still am at the tail end of it. Who knows? I don't know how long it goes on for.

That's the trouble, as you say, we're not educated. I don't think, I really, unless you really start looking into it and reading up, which after the barrage of messages we've had, I am going to start really doing my homework. I did feel for you, Natalie. I did feel for you, Natalie. I said to the girl at work who's currently going through it. I said my poor sister, no, I said, I've come up with this brainwave of a conversation what we can talk about.

I said, and she's obviously not there yet. She's going to read all these messages and go, oh my God, give me HRD now. But it must be frightening for you to be reading all of this. It is quite frightening. But it's educated you. It has. I went into it blind.

I knew nothing. Nothing about it. No. No. A bit like childbirth. I knew nothing at all. I remember sort of having a little go at your mum. And saying to her, why didn't you tell me it would hurt that much?

And she went, oh, I didn't want to scare you. Oh. And she went, oh, I didn't want to scare you. Oh. Bless her. I remember saying that to her. And why didn't you tell me it feels like you're going to have a poo? Because I didn't realize that was a sensation. We've done this to hear your stuff. Yeah.

And what I will say is I do think there is 100% room to do one in the future, but have a professional on who knows about this field to answer some of your questions. Oh, Davina on. I should. I should. I should. No, it's a massive subject, isn't you know? But it's huge.

So should we get cracking? Yeah. Jackie said, hi Nat and Auntie Linney. I love listening to YouTube putting the world to rights. This is my first time messaging. I just had to have my image. put on the menopause. I'm now 56 and have been on eustragil for a few years and I have to say it has been the thing that has saved my marriage. My poor husband used to just look at me and I would

glare back at him and he'd ask, what have I done now? And my response would be, you're just breathing. She doesn't. Does she say that? Bless that. I used to look at him and want to put a pillow over his head or smack him with a frying pan. Jackie Honestly, I felt I was going mad Luckily for him The jail did the trick And we're still going strong

After 33 years Love to you all Oh bless you Jackie Isn't it awful It's like it takes over you But again It all makes sense Because even if you go back to

70s 80s That sort of annoying Angry mother-in-law At that sort of Those sorts of ages And then the wife, the moaning wife. This is all to do with now what we're finding out scientifically.

And nobody spoke about it. Women were suffering in silence. They probably didn't even know they were going through the menopause. No. Men certainly had no clue. How awful that we are subjected to this, whether it's at home, in the workplace. It's awful.

And Natalie, now, the one thing that really, again, resonates with me is the fact that you've got women, like for me, I went through the menopause, literally textbook, as soon as I hit 50. Yeah. Maria was 30. Well, I was going to say to you, Maria who? My daughter. Yeah.

When I was 30, what? When I was started my menopause. Oh, I thought you were, but when she went through the menopause. No, when I was going through the menopause. Yes. There's women going through the menopause. They've got five, 10-year-olds. No, absolutely.

That's right. And maybe looking after their elderly parents. and possibly still working. Of course. Because you've got to work now, so you're 100. Otherwise, you're not going to be able to make ends meet. Do you understand how challenging all of that is? Yes.

You know, I'm saying I was fortunate in the sense that as much as I didn't know much about it. You were sort of independently living with Dave. You kind of had your space. My children had all left home by the time I was sort of mid-menopause. So I didn't have that pressure at home. But you didn't have toddlers. No. I mean, imagine.

going through the menopause. Well, imagine you, you're going through the menopause and joining starting a period. Well, I have to say, well, it will happen probably. Well, it probably will, yeah. I have to say the other thing, which I find quite amazing, is there are people that go through the menopause. They start perimenopause 32, 33.

Oh, gosh. We always think 50 here, but it's huge. 50 is textbook, isn't it? It's sort of the average. Yeah, but they're on young. Well, Lucy, that we met last Sunday. Yes. Lovely Lucy.

She's actually messaged in. She was a young girl. Yeah, let's listen to Lucy. Hi, girls. I don't know if you remember me about I met you all last Sunday in Leeds with Harry Bustin and his partner, Lucas. It's Lucy. And what a nice set of girls you are. As you know, I told you, I went through menopause at 29.

I had a baby and then literally didn't have a period for 10 years. So that's why I'm ringing in, really. is just to make people aware not to ignore it. I had tests and everything, but they all came back that I was fine. So I literally just ignored it. And then 10 years later went to doctors, and they said to me, what, you haven't had a period in 10 years? What the hell?

And this doctor were about to retire. And she said, I will not retire until I've sorted you out, girl. So basically, in that 10 years, I felt like I was dying from the inside. I was dry, my hair was falling out, I was moody, I had no sex drive. The list is endless. Anyway, eventually they finally got me on HRT and obviously there's a lot of talk around HRT but listen to Davina McCall because she's amazing. I've been on it now for 10 years and I'm telling you now it has literally changed my life.

I could not live without it. I am the person I always was before I went through the menopause. So I just want to advocate out there, please, if you need it, take HRT and also don't ignore the signs. And also another point, when you are going through the menopause, try not to fight it, just roll with it, let it happen, accept it. It kind of makes it a little bit easier. But yeah, wow. I wish anyone all the luck in the world going through it now, about to go through it, gone through it, or whatever. Okay, love you, bye.

Amazing. 29. No, that's awful now. So there you go. Everybody is different. Every human being is different. Our body clocks are different. When Westchow first took flight in 1996, the vibes were a bit different.

People thought denim on denim was peak fashion, inline skates were everywhere, and two out of three women rocked the Rachel. While those things stayed in the 90s, One thing that hasn't is that fuzzy feeling you get when WestJet welcomes you on board. Here's to WestJetting since 96. Travel back in time with us and actually travel with us at westjet.com slash 30 years. Okay. When I sell my business, I want the best tax and investment advice. I want to help my kids, and I want to give back to the community.

Ooh, then it's the vacation of a lifetime. I wonder if my out of office has a forever setting. An IG Private Wealth Advisor creates the clarity you need with plans that harmonise your business, your family and your dreams. Get financial advice that puts you at the centre. Find your advisor at IGPrivatewealth.com. I absolutely feel over the last six months that I get a little bit overwhelmed. More overwhelmed than I usually would. I could do a hundred things and not even think about them.

I, over the last couple of weeks, I'm waking up in the night. I never wake up in the night. Startled, wake up startled. And I get back to sleep, but I have never woken up in the night. There is a week before my period where I am absolutely exhausted, fatigued, more so than ever before. sweating. So I feel possibly, I had a hair strand test. I've spoken about this before.

But it was for a pod cut. You need to have proper blood tests properly. But I definitely feel a little bit different to myself. Right. So maybe you're at the beginning of something that's... Or as someone has said, we'll try and find the message. Is it just changing jobs? Life is different.

things are very different. I'm freelancing. I'm not just going to the same place. Very comfortable. It's constantly being challenged. It's more challenging life at the moment. So mentally it's probably quite exhausting because you're having to focus.

Sometimes you go to work and you do things paraphrashion. I used to quite easily. I loved it and was passionate. But I didn't need to think. Whereas now every day is different. There's different things to do. Which is more, it's draining. Yeah.

And that's the other thing I wanted to say. say, I think we can be bombarded with lots and lots of information and then self-diagnose ourselves when it could be, I mean, all of these symptoms, you know, it could be other things. I've got talking about the hot flushes, itchy skin, I'm talking about fatigue, not feeling yourself, feeling a bit moody, you know, those things could be other things. There are so many symptoms. Yeah. And you don't get all of them.

No, that's what I'm saying. So many symptoms. So how do you, you can't self-diagnose. It is something, you'll know, you'll know. For me, I only knew because I turned 50 in the June and then in July I didn't have a period. But what I'm saying is, that's how I knew.

But you can be perimenopausal for six years. Yeah. Well, I probably was. I didn't know. I didn't know. Do you remember feeling a little bit moodyer, a bit more snappier, sort of, Less tolerance or...

Natalie, I think it's a bit like having a baby. What do people say? If you remembered the pain, no one would have more than one child. So maybe it's a similar thing because I don't read... Maybe if you at that time were reading things and had people to talk to about it, you might have gone, yeah, that does happen to me. Ignorance is bliss. Sometimes.

So, yes, in the sense that if I did have a bad night. I mean, I had the hot flushes, don't get me wrong. Yeah, yeah. And I remember, but I feel like I'm having it now more than ever. It's funny, isn't it? Yeah, no. I'll do. I do.

The sleeping, I mean, yeah, I'm very hot through the night. My sleeping is awful. The brain fog isn't great. The bones are what they are. But I haven't felt the need to go to the doctors and say, I need HRD. Whereas I know so many of my friends who are like, I'm never coming off of it ever, ever, ever.

Whereas I genuinely have never felt that way. I think I've been really fortunate as I was with my periods. I didn't have period pains. I was regular like clockwork. I think I've just been blessed. I genuinely do because, as I say, the stories I'm reading, I'm like these poor ladies mentally. I don't feel that I felt fraught or...

Nothing heightened, no. I'm sure there was an element of it, but again, Natalie, nothing to make me feel like I need to go to the doctors. No. Or for Dave to say, what's wrong with you? Or for the kids to say, mum's not right. Do you know what I mean? No one ever said that to me.

Or for a friend to say, Lynne, you're all right. Yeah. Never felt that I spoke to a girlfriend and said, I just don't feel myself. I feel lost. I feel anxious. I feel ex. I feel, no, not really.

Well, we've had a couple of people say that they've breathed it as well. So, you know, there are people that do go through it and don't really know they've gone through it. Well, Tina, that I walk with, she's said the same. She's never, she's never taken HRT. And she's kind of just, and she's got a high-powered job in the city. Yes, yeah. Yeah, maybe we've been very, very fortunate. I mean, don't get me wrong, the brain fog is awful.

The bone situation isn't great. The weight gain, I had that. Yes. I mean, I'm not a big person, and we've spoken about this before, but I still put on a lot of weight for someone of my size, and I've always been extremely slim. Yeah. You can't lose weight.

You're battling with it. It's... Yeah, that's a huge symptom, isn't it? Hair loss, the hair loss. Yeah, I mean, when you, if I was to sit down and actually break it down, I've had many of it. But maybe my symptoms have, I've had them all. or many of them, but a mild version of them.

Probably didn't have anything severe like some women have. Well, we've got a message here. I love that EastEnders are running this story of honey. It's very much needed. However, I hope her experience that the doctors does not put people off going to the doctors. Yeah. Which I do agree with in a way.

I like the fact they've highlighted it because there are so many stories of so many women who get fobbed off. and they get fobbed off and they say, you're depressed, have an answer to press. Where they don't,

they're not, they don't know about it. Well, they play, these standards have been very clever because they had a young GP, female GP because they didn't want it to look, oh, you know,

it's a male, I went to see a male GP. Yeah, yeah. And I sort of walked away, because when I said about my issue, he said, well, we wouldn't give you HRT just based on your bones. You'd have to have many more symptoms

to us to even consider it. Right. Which was fine because I didn't actually feel I needed it. But it was a man. And no disrespect to men again. No. How are they going to be able to appreciate what it? I don't appreciate what it must be like for women.

No. That go through it really badly. And I've been through it. And I'm a woman. So how has a man ever going to? So they were cleverestenders. They got a young woman who'd just come off from maternity leave. And straight away, she kind of not poo-poohed it,

but she wasn't, she went straight to the fact that honey had previously had an eating disorder. Yeah, bulimia, yeah. And she was like, well, don't really know what that's got to do with the price of eggs. And honey even asks her, you know, how old are you? How would you know, you've never been through it. And remember, when a woman is going to the GP, there is a reason. There is a reason. So they're already on the edge because they need someone to help them.

they're either feeling lost, anxious, confused. You lose yourself. You're struggling through life. Everything's a struggle. You're dragging yourself out of bed. You know, you're losing sleep. Deprivation of sleep is the worst. Oh, it's the pit.

It can drive the most strongest of people, mad. So, so true. So to go and see a female GP who sort of just turns around and says, you need to be on antidepressants, I think my reaction would have been the same as honey. That's not the answer. Not good enough. But many women are on it rather than HRT

because I think they see it as a substitute because of I guess like any medication there could potentially be a side effect to it. Well, this lady said I've been perimenopausal since the age of 39 and now I'm 47 and I'm constantly tired, angry and so forgetful and forget to take my HRT tablets

which does not help lull. I have to say, being on Monjaro has really helped balance my cortisol levels and help me lose my menopause weight gains and to start loving myself and running again. Amazing. Which is fantastic. The worst thing is I'm having the worst painful, heavy periods of my life. And I have a lot of acne outbursts.

Oh. Isn't it incredible? 47. So she's still having a period. Yeah. But she's on HRT. Yeah. So she has been...

Perimenopausal for eight years. She's still having her periods. Wow. So this is what I mean. I don't know how long you're doing things for. It is absolutely fascinating. We need a special... We will.

We will get a specialist on, but we couldn't ignore all of these and pause it. We had to get this out there because people are wanting to talk about it. Let's have a listen to this. Oh, my God. Menopause, perimenopause. I'm 58 years old.

I'm 59 next month and I still am having periods. What the actual? What do you think? So I had four months where I didn't have any. I thought, this is it. I've done it. I've done it. But no, again, I've just got my period.

Oh my God. It's enough. now. Okay, Fiona from Southampton, pissed off. Oh, Fiona. Fiona, you could have a baby then. She's still having periods. 59? 58, 59.

Nice, isn't it? What us women have to do? What we've got to go through, it's not fair. It's a lot. It's a lot. It's a lot. It's a lot. I ain't nothing in each, Jen, just seeing your shout out to month menopause. I've been on HRT for a week and a half now.

Oh. I had a hysterectomy about 20 months ago, but I kept one over it, so didn't go straight into menopause. But now, yeah, I'm definitely in it. GP is a loads of rubbish, really. I've been back and forth for a couple of months now. And all she could tell me, really,

was, you know, the side effects of the drugs, which obviously they have to say, but like the worst ones that she didn't really talk about the benefits really I'm trying really hard not to read too much about HRT because and menopause because there's just so much conflict and information out there it's just really difficult I'm kind of just trying to get on with trying the HRT see how things go well I don't know I think we all need more education on it Everybody, professional, professional people, normal, everyday people, women, men, everybody.

I think everyone needs to be singing from the same hymn sheets as they say. And unfortunately, it's just not happening. It's too early to know whether it's working for me. I said it's really been on it less than two weeks. But fingers crossed and hopefully as a community, society, we can all get together and start talking about it more so eventually everyone's seeing the same things

by now. Oh thank you so much I do hope it works for you early days, isn't it? You've got to be on it about three months haven't you to see I don't know

I've never been on it but 12 weeks is usually Yeah It's got to be in your system It's got to be there But interestingly she says There's conflict of So that's the same as anything though

There's always a conflict with these things You've got to do what suits your body. I guess ultimately what you've got to look at, it's like any form of medication you take, isn't it? Yeah. You've got a way up whether the side effects of all the consequences, the potential consequences.

There's no guarantee that if you take HRT, it's going to affect you in any negative way. Well, the biggest health scare, correct me if I'm wrong, was it breast cancer? Yeah, it's cancer, yeah. Yeah. Well, I drink, so. Exactly, Natalie.

I'm not being, no. Which is why I'm saying, I guess in life, you've got a way up whether taking HRT, if you are feeling that shit and HRT is going to bring you back to the person you were, then that outweighs the negatives. I think so. Because the negatives may never happen. That's like any medication you take. Oh, enjoyment. Yes. So there's lots and lots of things, course things.

Yes. So it's down to the individual to do what they want to do. Yes. We've got a lovely message here from James. And I wanted to thank James. And I think we've got another man who messaged in that I'll read out later. But it just felt it filled me with joy just to hear from a gentleman. Yeah, good on him.

Hi, Nat, just seen your message for your next podcast about perimenopause and the menopause. And as a male, I know nothing about it. Ha, ha. However, I do have a partner. Sorry, I know you're not a fan of that term. you're right James I'm not really but we're not engaged or married but when it's cold she's always

freezing and when it's freezing she's always hot she's 42 however going off on a tangent I've mentioned before I'm a full time single dad to my 10 year old daughter Millie and she came home the other week and asked me about periods

and the changes with the female body during puberty as they've been learning about it in school so maybe I better brush up on all my knowledge anyway sorry for the late message enjoy the rest of the week and I hope your family is well. Love that, but you read when it's cold,

she's always freezing and when it's... That's what it says. So maybe she's banking. Yeah. Yeah. Lovely message, James. Very nice. And yes, James, men have to be educated too

because you're getting the brunt end of us. And also I just think there is still that thing, oh, the rolling of the eyes, oh, you're moaning again. Oh, you're tired again. Oh, she's... Oh, you don't want to have sex again. Oh, she's baking. Oh, oh, God, we've got to have the room cold and people moaning.

Yeah. I'm being completely honest here. I remember as a younger woman, when women would get the old fan out or start fanning themselves and go, oh, I'd be thinking it was a really odd thing to do. You'd be out in public and all of a sudden, yeah, I get it. It's so important for everyone to be educated. Yes. You know, at school, I guess now, did they give young girls, do they talk about periods? They must talk about.

They talk about periods and puberty. But where are you learning about the latest stage of life? If they're not doing it at school, where are you going to learn that? You're not. And that's why it just escapes you. That's why it's so important to talk. That's why it's so important to go on these forums now. Yeah.

Because you have got to self-teach yourself about this. Because, as I say, now reflecting back, I went into it completely naive, completely blind. I never spoken to anyone about it. Nobody at work was going through it. I mean, it's crazy. It is crazy. Someone has recommended a brilliant book. Well, she said it's brilliant.

It's helped her and helps with all the symptoms that come with the perimenopause. It's called Hormone Repair Manual by Laura Bryden. So L-A-R-A-B-R-I-D-E-N hormone repair manual. I shall pop it at the bottom of wherever you get your podcast, wherever you listen. And she said it's her perimenopause. eyeball. So I'm going to get one and have a little read. Well, it sounds like we have no choice because otherwise how do you know what you're entering into? So unless you, like the girl at work, again, she says she's on some kind of social media forum and gets, has an understanding,

yeah, chatting with people. Conversating is so important. That's why these pods are brilliant to get people together and get chatting. Yeah. Laura here from Larkfield, Kent, Perry at the age of She is now 64, still hot flushes. I've been through it all. I've wanted to kill people. Paranoia, anxiety. God. I chose no additional help

because then there were so many myths about good and bad effects. In between all of this, I lost my brother and my mum. And emotionally, like all of us, the worst time, but I just could not cope. Looking back, I wasn't just grieving. I was fighting menopause.

My husband only now realises what I was trying to explain. Thanks for sharing all of the uphill battles we all deal with. Thank you, Laura. Yeah, that's nice. That's what I'm saying. You can confuse things. Yeah.

It's quite easy to confuse things. Of course, if you've had terrible loss in your life and you don't feel yourself, you think that's what it is. Yeah. And she's 64 and still having hot flushes. So there you go, Linda. Yeah, no, yeah. No one says to you, you know, when you get to 60,

maybe you should come and get yourself tested to see if you're through the menopause or if you're still in the middle. How do you know? Who knows? You don't know if you're at the beginning of it. I don't know if I've been through it. So, you know, you get to a certain age

and you have your mammograms, don't you? And you can have your... Well, you get your smears, don't you? Your smears. Why are they not doing this for menopause? Because, well... It's all about money, I guess, isn't it? I would imagine it's all about money,

but also I did scream. A screenshot a couple of facts that I do find quite interesting. Half the world are women. 7% of the research. So that's half the world and 7% of research. PMS affects 90% of women, premenstrual stress. Arectile dysfunction affects 19% of men. erectile dysfunction gets five times the amount of research funding.

Yeah, see what? What is that all about? It needs to be addressed. But it is because of the big cheeses are men at the top. Do you think? I do. Well, things need to change. I do.

Because women, as I said earlier, are having children, many women, not all, many women are having children a lot later in life. Absolutely. And rightly so. Mm-hmm. They work. They have careers, high-powered jobs. Yep.

Until, I'm working like me. I'm still working full-time. So you've got to be able to understand what you're going to be going through whilst trying to hold down a high-powered job, run a house with young children. Also, just want a good life. You can be busy, you can have your children, but to feel yourself. Be yourself. And no one wants to feel the way they feel, which is why it annoys me, that kind of stereotypical, moaning, tired, boring.

And Natalie, it's got to be recognised. It's got to be recognised in the workplace, whether you work in a male environment. Absolutely. Male-orientated workplace or whether it's full of women. It's got to be recognised because it's not, it's a lot to deal with. It certainly is. Mentally, it's a lot to deal with, let alone physically. and I still don't, I don't, which is why I would love a professional to be on,

I don't fully understand why they're not so forthcoming with HRT. Listening to all those messages, reading all those messages, it does feel like HRT is the last result. There's got to be money, surely. I don't know. It's got to be. I presume so. I mean, I don't know, but I'm just sitting here being a cynic.

It's got to be money. This is a long one, but let's have a listen to this. Hi, now, it's Sarah here from North Team. Hope your lovely lot are doing okay. And thank you for the absolutely fabulous pod today. Really great subject matter with Tony about big life changes. It was so, so good. I've just seen your note regarding perimenopause and menopause,

and thought I'd just share my experience. I'm 52. Oh, 53 next Friday. But it was about three years ago, having had the contractual. receptive implant in my arm for quite a number of years, it means that I don't get periods, which has been absolutely fantastic. But consequently, with no real sort of symptoms of menopause, I've got no idea really where my body's at. So December 22, I actually lost my dad, but early 23, I kind of felt that I ought to get on this HRT

train and obviously with the implant in my arm they I chatted to the doctor about HRT and they gave me the patches I think it's the estrogen patches which I found horrific to be honest because they just such a pain so sticky and they slid around underneath your clothes but anyway the worst of it was that I really felt my mental health suffered granted I I'd lost my dad, but I kind of adjusted to that. But it was early into 23 within sort of a few weeks of being on it. I felt that my mental health took a real nose dive, like really, really dark places and chatted to the doctor about it.

And they encouraged me to actually stay on it. They said I shouldn't come straight off. And it took some time to adjust. So I kept on for a while. wasn't saying any improvements. So in the end, do you know what? Rightly or wrongly, I just took myself off of it. And I picked back up again really quickly.

However, a few years on, the contraceptive implant has expired. So I've had that removed early this year. And actually had the coil fitted, the marina coil. So obviously, I've got the estrogen with that. And I've since gone on to, I've always got my estrogen and progesterone, muddled up. But either way, I've gone onto the spray, the HRT spray, so much easier. Transition, you know, no mental health problems. And, you know, since I haven't been on anything at all, I was getting really bad hot flushes. So I started taking black cohosh, and it worked an absolute dream.

But then, as I say, having had the implant taken out my arm, I kind of felt I needed to make a decision. But just wanted to say that, yeah, between the coil and the spray, working really well, so life is good. Just hope that it's some sort of encouragement for other people who are sort of in between making decisions. But that's me. Sorry, 40 seconds over. Oh, it's lovely to hear from you. Thank you. Interesting. So interesting because the patric didn't work for her and made her a really dark, dark thought. It's a mental aspect of it's scary, isn't it?

Well, also I think it's that suck it and see. You don't know what's going to work. I just don't know. It's a bit trial and error. What works for you might not work for me. The spray, again, funny enough, my colleague mentioned. Really? She was on the jail and she's gone onto the spray.

And it's good for her? Yeah. Yeah. That's good. For practical reasons as well as, yeah. It's helping her. I feel like I've missed out a little bit, if I'm honest. Sprays, gels, tablets.

Yeah. I'm not done any of it. It's weird. I'm intrigued now as to how maybe I would feel even now. Wow. If it would change anything, but I think it's probably a little bit too late. It's never too late, though. No, I guess not.

It isn't. It isn't. It's never too late. No, but I don't feel like I need to, I guess. But I never realised, again, I bumped into many years ago, before I was menopausal. my old headmaster's wife in Marx and Spencer's, good old Marxist, and we've got chatting and stuff, and she was saying how she'd retired, and she said, and because I've retired, I've come off HRT.

So I said, what do you mean? You've come off HRT because you retired. She said, well, because now I'm quite happy to go through the menopause. And I was like, what do you mean? I said, what, if you take HRT, doesn't that mean you just sort of swerve the menopause? She went, no, it just delays it again. Who knew? No.

So all it's doing is delaying it, which again, I understand, because then people can say, right, my children have left home now. I've retired. Well, some people just take it forever. Or you take it forever. But once upon a time, Natty, they didn't want you taking it. No, I know, of course. I don't know where they stand with that now. At Desjardin, our business is helping yours.

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Retribution. Murder. Prophecy. Beer and propane. The ultimate soldier. The best of the best stories now with even more from Hulu. Amazing. Have it all with 3-1 Disney Plus. Jane, from the New Forest, she said, Menopause gave me the worst hot flushes ever.

They started in my feet and burned up through my body to my face. My mind was fuzzy. I felt generally off, short-tempered. spoke my mind, etc. Menopause started in 2020, still have a lot of the symptoms today. They are less, and I've learned to manage them. Doctors were advising coping strategies instead of HRT, partly because I wasn't keen to take HRT. I found menopase is my medication, helped calm a lot of the symptoms, but really the worst experience I will ever know. Brilliant pod, great subject, goes on forever, loads of love from Jane. So again, there are lots and lots of people who want to do the holistic route.

They don't want to take medication. And there are lots of people living a fantastic life by really, really having a deep dive into it and doing their homework, eating the right foods at the right times. There are certain, I mean, I've read up on it. There are certain days of your cycle you should be eating avocados or leafy this. And, you know, people really do go into it and try and do that approach, which I find quite amazing. It is about educating yourself, is it? Alcohol is not good for it.

Alcohol is not good for anything. Getting the right amount of sleep, being aware of going to sleep at the right times, not changing routine too much, weight training, strength training, moving, exercising, eating well. All of those things can help as well. Of course. You've just got to find a balance that works for you. You've got to help yourself a little bit, I think. Yeah, you can't just sit back and think, oh, you know, I'm just going to have HRT and that's going to just solve all my problems.

No, because it may add to your problems. Yeah, I mean, I take magnesium to help me sleep. I've just started taking magnesium a month of night. Yeah, I take because of this. Yeah. Yeah. For your last couple of panicked, keep waking up. It's not like me.

And is it working for you? Yeah, I've only had a couple of nights. Also, I take osteocare tablets. That's really good that you do that. So I take those for cartilage and for the bones. And I'm doing it regularly now. I have to leave them out. Otherwise, I forget to take them, which I hate.

But I've put them away today because I've had a clean-up. But I will get them out again. And I take, I don't know, honestly, I promise you, everyone, you know, I'd tell you, it's not an advert. I saw it on an advert, on Instagram or whatever. And there were loads of reviews, and they're called hormone harmony. they're quite very expensive. But I bought a couple of pots.

The first pot I've not done properly, it's finished, but it's very sporadically taking a few here, they're terrible. But now I am religiously taking three a day. And it's meant to help with your bloating or your tiredness, and it's to just keep your hormones in check. Listen, I don't know. I don't bloody know, but I'm giving it a go. Yeah.

I don't know. You know, lotions, potions, tablets. It's just everything, Natalie. It's hard work. Yeah, it's really hard. And also physically, you know, the collagen side of what happens to you as you get older and go through menopause. So you start to notice wrinkles and you think, oh God, then you get, you thicken. Even if you don't gain weight.

No, you're naturally thicken. Your middle thickens, doesn't it? And you're like, oh, what's that all about? So physically, you already don't feel like you look like the person you were. So you're doing everything possible to try and like yourself physically. And then mentally what you're subjected to. It's a lot to. It's a lot to do.

And that's why I feel it's so important for men or younger people who haven't gone through it yet, women, whatever, like you say, people in the workplace in their 20s, and they're like, oh, why she's she moody? I feel like it should be really spoken about a lot. And on that note of education, I loved this message. Have a listen to this. Hi, Nat. Wow.

Perimenopause and menopause, that is a can of worms. You might need a few Eps to get through all the stuff that we could talk about on this subject. We're going to. We're going to have to. I honestly don't know whether I'm going through it or not. part of me thinks that I've got to be, but my only symptom is that I'm 45 and there's no way that at 45 I can't be at least perimenopausal. Now having said that, I do get moody. I do have days where I wake up and I just want to cry for no apparent reason and other things that could be

classed as perimenopausal, but they could also just be symptoms of a busy working mum. This is what I'm saying. So there seems to be a very blurred line between what are menopausal symptoms and what are just symptoms of a very busy, stressful life. So I honestly can't tell you. One thing I can tell you is that at work we started a menopause peer support group. And it's brilliant.

anyone is invited, men included, and so far they've only been about six or seven of us, but every three months or so, we will get together in work time on a team's call, and we will just talk. And there's a mix of, there's people in their 20s that just want to learn about what they've got coming. There are people my age who are interested because we're on the cusp of it. There are people that have gone through it. We even had a guy join one of our sessions because his wife's going through it and he wanted some advice. And I tell you what, it is such good fun.

It's just nice to have an hour with people talking about this subject and just being real about it, putting your cards on the table and saying, yes, I've had the rage. Yes, I get grumpy with my husband. Yes, being a woman, shit, but we're all in it together and it's actually a real laugh. So that would be my tip for anyone. Get together with like-minded people and just have a laugh about it because at the end of the day there's nothing we can do about it. We're all going to go through it, whether we have lots of symptoms or none.

We're all going to go through it and we're all in it together. So, yeah, join a peer support group. I highly recommend it. They're great fun. She's absolutely right. And how brilliant that. Her workplace have done that. Fantastic.

And it's not a lot. It's on a Zoom call, an hour. and it just for people like It makes you feel like you're not alone It's the same as all the subjects we cover Yeah It doesn't matter if you're talking about Cutting in on a motorway

Yeah Washing your feet Yeah Perimenopause Yeah Yeah Whatever relates to you You go

Someone else is thinking what I'm thinking Oh that's not just me It's not just me that And I think by doing what they're doing In their workplace Even if you're working with a 22 year old guy who's probably never even heard of menopause he might take in 10% of that

discussion but already he's going to have a little bit of understanding so when he goes home and his mum is hyperventilating or she's got beads of sweat pouring down her face he might have a little inkling and be that little bit more sensitive

compassionate yeah talking of men Regarding perimenopoles and menopause, as a man, I feel this needs to be taught in schools as it affects everyone directly or indirectly. We need to know how it affects people. And that was from Liam. Well done, Liam. I agree with you.

I do think it needs to be... Even if maybe school, there's so much going on and hormonally at 15, 16, 17, even if you were doing your A-levels, you're kind of starting out, aren't you? So I think the workplace is a... great place for where it should be. When you say the workplace, Natalie, you could be working, I don't know, for Sainsbury's or, what are they going to, yeah, I guess. Emails, a monthly newsletter.

Yeah. If you'd like to come and join the group, how hard is it? Like you say, the world is 50% women. We're not a minority, are we? No, no, I find it absolutely fascinating. It's a huge subject. And I do hope, firstly thank you to all of you. Yeah, for making the effort to reach out.

Reach out, personal things. You're talking to us about things that are very personal. It really means the world. And I know some of you said, oh, I'd like advice on this or I'd like advice on that. We can't give that. But I am going to do another one. I shall keep those messages. Yeah, there's loads to read out.

And I'm going to get a professional on who you and I can have a chat with. Ask all the questions that people are asking, you know, that we don't know about. because as usual, we sit here, we're not professionals in this. We don't claim to be professionals. We're just talking from our own experiences. Your experience. Am I beginning yet? Which I will be, you know, 43 in May, you know, it's not going to be.

Does it worry you? It's around the corner. I feel like you're worrying about it. No, I'm not worried. You're preparing yourself for it. I want to prepare. I'm going to be as prepared as I possibly can. Because, again, I think that comes from my mum.

And it worries me because my mum did not handle that well. No. We knew nothing like about it. Correct. But I think she handled it very badly. Absolutely. Because someone of her generation, you don't, definitely don't speak to anyone about it. No.

She had a baby in her 40s. She was looking after an elderly mother in her 40s. Can you imagine? But I remember her changing the bed every day. Do you? I remember, I say do you, I remember her telling me, oh, I'd broken up in a pool of water, Linda, and I didn't even understand it. No.

But mentally, how tiredness, all of that. All of it. What she went, oh, my God. So I feel I want to be absolutely prepared. Once again, I think there is a stigma. I think people will go, oh, you'll keep going on about that. You will get that. Oh, what are you reading that for?

You keep talking about it. I'm going to talk about it. I'm going to educate myself. I'm going to know all the right things to do. The do's and don'ts get every option so I can maintain me as much as I can. As best you can. It makes me feel sad for the likes of your mum

that she had to go through that on her own. Silently. Yeah, that's not okay. We don't know. Maybe she used to speak to a friend. Maybe they had the odd chat. I hope so. But yeah, it saddens me

what women in the past went through in many different ways. But this subject is. Hard. We can open up a forum here, can we? Another forum. Another group chat. It's important.

And honestly, I will. I'm going to pop up a little Facebook message. And I will say, little perimenopause, I'll do a post, and then people can write in that. And I would love to see what you're all right, and we can have a, but see how that gets on. I think we should. Yeah, 100%. Oh, it's been lovely. Always.

Always. Always pleasure. Never a chore. I've done enough chores today. He's done a bit of a spring clean, guys. Only downstairs in one room. It's good though. Shattered.

I'm going to go and make us some dinner now. Oh, delicious. I've got rosé breaded veal. Oh. Baby new herbie potatoes. And I'm going to pan fry us a little bit of broccoli and garlic. Oh, she looks after me, people. Lesser heart.

Have a brilliant rest of the week. Let us know your thoughts. 0778-28-201919. I'll speak to you on Thursday. Loads of love. Thank you for listening and tell your friends. Lim, thank you. Pleasure.

See you later. Bye, everyone. See you. Bye.