Life with Nat - EP270: Nagging with Auntie Linny #33 - World Mental Health Day

Episode Date: October 7, 2026

It's World Mental Health Day tomorrow, so we're taking another look into our own, and the listeners, mental health support strategiesSamaritans 116 123Childline - under 19 years old - 0800 1111Campaign against living miserably - 0800 585858National Suicide Prevention UK - 0800 587 0800 Get in touch with Nat, buy tickets for upcoming live shows and link to Patreon, all the family's Instagrams, and more: ⁠⁠⁠lifewithnatpod.komi.io⁠⁠⁠ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome to Life with Nat on this lovely Thursday afternoon. On Saturday, it is World Mental Health Day. So I have got the best person I can talk about this sort of stuff with. My sis, Auntie Linney's here. You're right, darling? Yeah, hi, hi, everyone. We had a bit of a funny old weekend, didn't we? A bit of a boogie on Saturday.

Boogie on a bit of candy. I don't know what you were doing. We were all doing candy. You were doing some strange moves. I can never... I get the hang of it in about the last 30 seconds and then it stops every time. Yeah. Oh, you actually did get the hang of it, did you?

And then I do it and then I do a couple of rounds and it goes off. I wish someone had got that on. I get really upset. I sort of go back and then I'm going just the wrong way. Can't do it. It was good. It was such a long... Did you enjoy it?

It was brilliant. You smashed it, the three of you. It was a lovely afternoon. Also, thank you for letting me go for a wee. Yeah, that was a bit sneaky view, but she'd done me right up like a kipper. It was brilliant. It was just so lovely to see so many people that have reached out that you can now put a face to a name. There's too many of you to mention, so I'm not going to start naming names,

but I managed to catch up with a lot of our listeners. Obviously, the usual crew were there, our Queen Camilla and Sam and Beck's beautiful, human beings. It was incredible. It was lovely. It was nothing, it was such a lovely afternoon. We've said it before and I'll say it again, but especially because we're talking about mental health today. Just having a lot of women together in a room, like-minded people, they've obviously got the interest of the pod. So this is, you know, that's their, yeah, exactly. That's something they hold dear to them and it's part of their week. So they immediately have something to talk about there were so many solo people on their own.

I was, the amount of women I spoke to, again, I'm not going to start quoting names because there were so many of you, and because I've got a really bad memory, and I would ask, are you, with someone, have you come on your own? No, I've come on my own, and I'm like, that's just amazing. Well, I don't think I could do that. I think you could. I think now that I'm older, but. I think if you had an interest in something.

Maybe. And then you'd started chatting on Facebook and... Sitting on the tape, you know, there was a... I think at one point there was actually a table that it was all people that were on their own. And they've all ended up sitting together. Because I asked, I can't remember if it was Rachel. I think it was Rachel who had actually messaged in to say she was coming on her own. And I said, make a point of introducing yourself, even if we have met before.

But she did. Yeah. And I said, you're not on your own. You know, you're talking to people. She said, yeah, there's a few of us on this table that are on our own. I said, that's amazing. Honestly, it warms my heart. It's absolutely warming and all of the feedback I've had, a few messages from people and thank you so much.

Obviously, we're going to discuss it in detail with the girls, but just people saying it was a wholesome, fantastic afternoon. They've had a good laugh, a good dance, a good chimwag, met some new friends and gone home happy. How better but to uplift yourself if you're having a bit of a bit of a bit of a bit of, crap week or a crap year, something's happened that's causing you distress or upset. And a few ladies did talk to me with regards to, you know, they're situated, obviously, they know the pods we do based on grief or mental health. And they did open up to me, which again, ladies, I love, love, love how, well, just the voice notes we received today about mental health, how open people are, predominantly women, as we've

discussed before. Men are a closed book, aren't they? And that's so healing in itself that you're sharing, how you're feeling, what you've been through. Well, I think it gives you that, me too. Someone can say, oh no, I've been through that or I feel like that sometimes and you just go, it's not just you. It's not just me. I'm not on my own. It's normal to feel that way. And I think that is the power of conversation and the power of sharing. Mental World Health Day on Saturday, its theme is tea and a talk. And we were discussing, hopefully doing some sort of afternoon tea and a talk in the new year. You know, we're going to have a real think about it.

But, you know, like Auntie Linney's tea and talk would be, I think, a fantastic thing. Let us know your thoughts. And if you'd like that, O-S7-8201919. Before we start, we've had some really moving, heartfelt and sad messages on the pod. I'm going to read out some numbers. which I think are really important in case you need to get help when you listen to this as quickly as possible.

So you can call 116-123 to talk to the Samaritans. If you're under 19, you can call 0-800-1-1-1 and that's to talk to childline if you're under 19. There's a fantastic charity, Mind, and they have a campaign against living miserably, calm. and that's 0-800-58-58 and that is open from 5pm to midnight.

If you are affected by suicide or you have any suicidal thoughts, you can speak to them. You also have the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK, which is 0-8007-0807. And all of those numbers I will put underneath the pod for you. And again, we're having a conversation. We can have a laugh. It isn't deep, but those numbers are really important just in case you feel like you want to talk to someone. And we must emphasise we're not qualified in this field.

No. We're just here to have a chat, share our own experiences and allow you guys to open up to us. So you do feel you've got someone you can, even if it is putting it down in a text, that in itself can be very healing. So healing, and we've had so, so many. Oh, yeah.

But I thought I'd start with just talking about how I feel. I was talking to a mum at school, and she was talking about how she feels quite anxious. And it's that feeling of just catching your breath a little bit more, being aware of your breath and just feeling a bit overwhelmed. Now, again, we've spoken, again, we've spoken about perimenopause, menopause, I don't know if this is the beginning of it.

I feel very much my cycle is very, very normal. There's no change within my menstrual cycle at all. But I used to be able to have a hundred things lined up and not even think about it. Right now you feel overwhelmed when there's a... I can't... It looks like a huge mountain. What used to be, this looks really fun. Really?

And I'm going to do all of this. I now go, oh, I've got that to do, that to do. I've got four days where I've got something to do. Right, yeah. Now, I don't know if that is a mixture of... It's a combination of age, Natalie. Well, not being in a regular job anymore, where I'm out all the time.

I've been very fortunate to have more time at home. I'm a creature of habit. I love being at home. And actually, I think being busier will be really good for me. Yeah, me too. because unfortunately it's life can be a bit habitual as well can't say it if you get used to being at home and you've got your little routine and then all of a sudden like in your case because there's no real structure to your week because you don't know well look you've just said an appointment tomorrow's been

moved already straight away you went oh my god I need childcare now so that can automatically may make you feel that element of anxiety because already what you had mapped out for tomorrow has gone out the window because someone's changed it for you. At 10 to 7 at night. At 10 to 7 at night there's not a lot of notice.

And again there's an art to I guess learning or educating yourself to not allow something like that to cause you that anxiety because everything and anything can be resolved and in life you can sometimes just say no if it doesn't work for you but easy for me maybe to say.

You would never say no. No. The most professional person in the world. No. It's not your mobile. You weren't well last week. Yeah. Yeah.

You were in work. You don't have a day off. No. Just not in your nature. No. And I think. But it doesn't cause me anxiety or stress as such. No.

I don't feel it does. Mm. You know, I just do it. I just, I sometimes think it becomes, it's, for me, it would cause me more stress. Yeah. Not to do something. Yeah. If I can't do it or I feel like I've got so much, I've got so much hot

and I'm sort of causing myself my own problems, but it would cause me more stress not to do it than to just do it. I do think, though, I saw a couple of memes, you know, they come up on Insta or whatever, and there's sort of this bedraggled woman and all her hair's up and she's half-dressed, and she's like, yeah, I can help you. That is you. Not a draggle, by the way, the bad hair. Bloody good, isn't it, guys?

She's having to go at me again. But what I mean is you, yeah. Everybody goes to you. Well, the girl at work tonight said it. Because I said, I've got to go home now. I'm going to do a pod. New girl. She went, you cram a lot into your day.

Because I showed him a video. I finished work yesterday. Didn't walk because teens is away. Went to Elias and I'm jumping on a bouncy castle with James in my work clothing for about half an hour. Brilliant. Well, I've got your exercise in. Oh, so I got my steps in, yeah. But I thrive on that.

I also think your regular walking is huge for your mental health. Totally. Without doubt. I wonder if you didn't walk, if someone said you can't walk now, and you had a few months not walking, I think it would severely affect you, genuinely. But that's why I can't give up work. Which is mean?

because I know I woke up tomorrow morning and I just got out of bed and then just went downstairs and made a cup of tea and then I was like, oh, should I turn out? No, but you wouldn't because you pop around here. Do your housework, yeah. Elias, Marias, pop around to me. Then you would be helping me with my admin, do a few extra pods. Be great.

But I would have to do that because I'd have to feel my day. I'm a doer, rightly or wrongly, that I have to be active. Your brother does, it says it. He says, can't you just sit down for five minutes? I go, no, because if I'd sit down, then I'm done for the day. So I'll just keep going. And then I enjoy my time, you know, 8 o'clock, 9 o'clock. I was going to say, what is your, because I think people would like to know,

we're always talking about Linda doing everything. She's out, Lynne, she's walking, she's working, she's, and we know all of that side. But it's everything, it's like even Friday. We're having a team bonding evening, which is just because we've got this new girl. that started, lady, should I say. And we're just going to go for a drink. And I said, oh no, we're not just going for a drink. We'll go to a pub that's got a dartboard and we'll have a dance competition.

Oh, yeah, that's good. So just, otherwise, we're going to sit there. It's not your thing, is it just sat there, really? It's not even that. Remember, we're together every day of the week. We're a small team. We're together every day of the week. And then we're going to be out and...

Doing the same sort of thing, but with a drink. Whereas if you're doing an active sport, it's a laugh, it's competitive. Did you do well in the darts? because you are quite sports. I mean, they dance for Barclays, I have you know. Did you do well? Of course I did. Yeah, brilliant.

But yeah, maybe that sums me up. Maybe I'm just a competitive person that feels that... Doing. And also I just feel like... We're only here for a short time. There's just so much I want to do. You can cram in. I just do, you know, live your lives, feel your lives.

There's so much out there I still want to do. Yeah, I think it's wonderful. But I think the listeners one might. know. What is your relaxing time? Talk us through when you get into bed. The things people don't know, tell you on. Like, what's just that little bit before bed? No, because you all freak out if I tell you what I do. No, why? You will, because I log on and do a bit of work. I know. I clear my email, so I'm ahead of the game for tomorrow. It never works. I've really didn't think you were going to say that. That's terrible. I've got a book that I need to read. That's

In a week. Is that all we've got? Yeah. I've read one page. And I've read it. It's really good. And the first page, you know,

I enjoyed it. I'm going to like this book. You are. You're going to love it. I've just got to make time to do that. I will read this book. I love telly. Yeah.

I do like, I enjoy my TV. I'm watching The Blame, Michelle Keegan. It was filmed in Hartford, so it's amazing to watch. Obviously the traitors. I'm hooked. I love my soaps.

Eastenders and Corrie. That's my pastime. I love. TV, but again, I'm watching that at silly o'clock. But that is your winding down. But that's my wind down. And I love going out with, you know, whether it's with Dave and friends or like, you know, work colleagues. I do think social is so important.

The social side. I really think it's so good for you to go out, have a nice blowout. Different conversations. Different conversations. Different people, different interests. I just think it's so good for you. I think they're mixing with different people. And I love that on that.

Different people, different interests, different conversations. We're very like in that manner, I think. I think it's love. I'm fascinated by people. Me too. Fascinated. That's why I love doing the listener pods on Patreon, getting them on for 20 minutes,

you don't know what you're going to get, ringing people up. It's, like you say, fascinating. Because it's a big world out there. We're really hot. I'm just going to take my socks off. Sorry. I'm sweating.

You did this before. Oh no, I'm sorry, I'm so hot. Yeah, that's interesting. Because of the weather still. It is extremely mild. So freezing this morning. Yeah, you've got to do the layers, haven't you? Sporing.

When I, no, but when... Shetra. Brown a smelly sock, don't know. Yeah, it's lovely weather though for October. Come on. This is brilliant. I'm bored. That's stiff, but yeah.

I get it. I mean, I literally had to put tights. Well, tites were Saturday. My first time I put tites on. However. How wonderful for people who are worrying about their heating bill. Yes. We can keep that heating off for people.

They're not going to be cold. I mean, you know, it's good. Again, financial, you know, a financial situation can cause people a hell of a lot of stress. Absolutely. I would say one of the main causes of stress. But even mine have been, Natalie, sometimes people suffer with it without even knowing what has triggered. Of course. Listen, when I did that health and social care course,

we had a, obviously it was a couple of days and a few little questions in my exam about mental health. It's, you know, good mental health, bad mental health, how you perceive it is such a huge subject. We could just do a podcast every week on mental health. When was the last time you weren't okay? But when you're asked if you're okay, you say, yeah, I'm fine.

probably that feeling of being overwhelmed with loads of stuff for the first sort of week I felt like that I'd say no yeah I'm all good but why do we do that because we don't want to burden people you feel stupid it's boring you don't want to come across as a moaner

and we like helping people I don't need any help from anyone else I'll deal with it Whereas actually, when I do say, I feel completely overwhelmed with what's coming up, I said to Mark, I don't know what I'm going to do, not being at home at Christmas. I just, I can't picture what it's going to be like. You, no, our darling audience, listeners, sorry, she hasn't stopped going on about it.

It's actually starting to stress me out now. But that just shows how much that is troubling you. It's just because I love being at home at Christmas. But you're not going to be. You've committed to something. And it will be fantastic. And it all changed last Friday. Because I went for my...

Oh, your flying thing. It was so good. There you go. I was so worried about heights, about lots of different things. I won't go into it because it's all a surprise. Yeah. But I was so worried because you know what I'm like with anything like that.

And I smashed it. Oh, really? It was over, in half the time it should have been. They said, Dev, can't believe it. And I loved it. So immediately, 50% of my worry is gone. We've just got to get rid of the other 50%. Which is just me being organised.

And I want people to have their presence. And I want to wrap my presence on time. And I want. But if you want that, then just make it happen. Yeah, just make it happen. This is the problem. You can spend so much time using all your energy. It's preempting.

I'm worrying about something you cannot control. You're doing the pantomime, fact. And it will be. And it will be fine. We know it will be fine. And I get it. I totally get where you're coming from. And it's good in a way that you voice it because you're getting it out.

But you've got to somehow just focus all that energy on getting organized with your Christmas presents. Yes. And then, because I'm doing that, Natalie, because I feel exactly the same as you. I'm going away for 10 days in November, which for me means the best part of my November is written off, coupled with the fact that a couple of weekends prior to going away,

we've got live shows. Yes, I've lost those weekends. No, it's fine. I love doing them and seeing all our listeners. I've got Christmas too. So what am I doing? I'm starting to purchase. Christmas presents.

So alleviate that stress. You're absolutely right. But imagine now, just so you under, I'm putting yourself in my shoes that you're out at 8am. No, I get it. Until 10 to 11 p.m. For the whole of, you've got no to, you're not. You just got to be organised. I know, but I'm quite busy before then as well.

But do you know what? I'm very grateful to be busy. Yeah. There's some really exciting things, really boring. Can't tell you about them everyone. Coming up. But things have come up. I can't believe they've come up.

I've had to say yes. So imagine if it was the. the other way around. Yeah, and you're someone that's just lost your job, being made redundant. I'm sat at home and I can't afford Christmas. I have thought of that, I promise you. You've always got to try and flip it. Turn it.

Yeah, turn it on its head. Yeah, and make it a positive thing rather than a stressful and negative thing. Yeah, and I'm not sitting here, please. There are people, you probably think, poor her. She's got to go to pantomime every night and have a laugh. But everyone stresses their own stress, isn't it? Yeah, yeah. Talking of which, shall we get on with some?

Yeah, please, because there's quite a few. Hi, love. Here's my little bit about mental health and what I do to help my mental health, particularly in this perimenopausal stage of life where, you know, as we know, things can be really tough. For me, my way of sharing my worries or dealing with when I'm feeling a bit down is basically to go to a fitness class. I am blessed to have an amazing lot of powerhouses of women around me

who go to these classes, you know, two, three, four times a week. And in that hour that you're there, you're not thinking about anything else. You are just in that moment, doing your absolute best, absolutely sweating, laughing together, crying together. It's just utter joy. But yeah, that's my therapy, I guess, which is an absolute laugh, really, because at school I was the person that never wanted to do PE. I always used to get my mum to write me a note in cross-country or whatever.

but I actually wouldn't be without it or without those girls in my life. Yeah, it's incredible really. But everyone to their own is there and everyone has to find their own thing. But having people, particularly other women, to talk to, is the most important thing. I couldn't be without other women in my life to discuss things with. And even if it is just for someone to go, oh yeah, me too. And just for you to think, actually I'm not the only person that feels this way, then that to me is everything.

Anyway, I'm going to stop waffling. I've gone over the minute. But hi, Auntie Linney, love you. What a lovely human she is. You can meet some very special people in life. And Bex and I have certainly connected. She's a lovely girl. She's a really nice girl.

She's a nice chat with her on Saturday. She's got a very calming demeanour, isn't she? When she speaks, it's very calming. You can listen to her. And yeah, she's a lovely, lovely soul. She really is. I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass. Shmozing. She's a shoozing. She's a lovely lady. Yeah, really is. And she's absolutely spot on. Again, exercise in the company of women. And I'm not, again, it sounds like we are men. Just saying that you're comfortable,

you're talking about. No, it's because again, man's not going to be able to relate to perimenopause, menopause, or stresses are running a home maybe because ultimately, And that load on the brain that we have. It is very different. I will say it and I'll say it all the time. And that book came out years ago, men are from Mars and women are from Venus. We are different animals.

And it's right, when we're indifferent. We're completely different. And I do think women do have to take on so much more now than say back in the day of, you know, where women were stay at home, didn't go to work, run the house, of course, did the cooking. Yeah. But now we're doing that.

and everything else that comes with it. So, of course, being in female company is probably going to benefit your talk. People won't mind. She's having to sing something on the shower. She's singing in her bath. She's singing in her bar. Yeah, you're going to get it. If you say to a woman, oh, you know, I feel really shit today.

My hair, I've just washed my hair. It's all flat. Exactly. You know, I feel like it's. got thinner than ever, you're going to get it. Because unfortunately, again, this is one of the... Or my breasts really hurt or I'm so bloated this and I feel like this and my jeans are too tight or... A bloated.

I really fancy crying and... Yeah. Yeah. It's just different. Yeah. It's just different. And it's so good to have female company. And again, not everybody has that.

I mean, if Mark was to say to me, my ball bags are heavy, I'm not going to know. No, but I'm not going to know, am I? I thought you had ball. You thought I had balls before you read some balls. We've certainly got some balls that aren't there. I'll tell you that. Boles of bloody steel is what we've got. Well, I might be growing some soon

because when they'd be making me my morning coffee at work, which I do thank you very much, teen. I'm not knocking you. It transpires. Instead of putting my collagen in the coffee, they've been putting my boss's cottage. I have to say, your voice did sound a bit gruff, and I did think a beer was coming on,

but listen, each to their own. I think we did an app once, didn't we? We changed your face and you just looked like Dom when you've got a beard. Yeah, you did. You know, you did. What? No, I think I did as well, yeah. Which is strange, because we're not related.

I thought you was going to say I looked like the person that won the Eurovision. Oh, yeah. Hang on. Who was it? Conjita. No. I don't know. I had a beard.

Is it conjita? Oh, I don't know. Oh, everyone will be screaming. Go on, scream, scream. But, yeah. You know who I mean? I do know who you mean. And everyone said, all that looks like.

Well, listen, I look like, honey, Jude. What can we do? We've all done things. Hey, Nat, just seen your message for your next pod. We have had an awful 2026 in relation to mental health. And our close family is still in a secure unit with no light at the end of the tunnel just yet. But with that, my father-in-law passing, it has been a tough year. Me and my husband are now closer than ever.

He was really struggling and we were lucky enough to access therapy. This and seaside walks and talks have been. a godsend. We have also included our five-year-old in this journey as appropriate, and we're actively encouraging sharing moments when we may be struggling and making it less taboo to talk about. He is amazing and sharing his worries or understanding that being sad isn't a bad feeling or a feeling we should hide, and that is from our listener, Natalie. Well put Natalie, and that's true, being sad isn't something you should hide or be ashamed of. It's just another emotion.

It's just an emotion that, yeah, if you can. share that emotion with people around you. A, they start to have an understanding. Because again, unless you've, you know, sometimes in life, when you've expected, like, we have our grief pod, don't me? Absolutely. For me, that's such a easy pod. Well, we could just talk, I could talk about it every time we're here for an hour. Because we've been through it.

We know the pain, different pains, everyone goes through whatever, but you've been through it. So I think, I think it's really brave, actually, Natalie. I think it's really brave that you have included your five-year-old in that. I think it's a great learning curve and I think I don't know if I would have been brave enough to include my five-year-old in that and I think it's really good because now the more we learn about children,

the more open you are, the better it is emotionally for them growing up. And I think, again, schools are very much now... Well, they have all their PHSC, they're discussing emotions and all of that, but everything starts in the home. Yeah, agreed. So I commend you and I think it's great. And your seaside walks and therapy. Yeah, what better therapy than walking along the sea.

How beautiful. Fresh air, talking and supporting each other, you and your husband. And fresh air is so important than getting out, getting out of the house. You know, they're working remotely now for many people. That can be very isolating. I think so. And in some cases, people aren't leaving their. homes for days on end, that's really not healthy.

And then you become insular and then you don't want to go out. No. You know, it's that feeling. Like, you know, if you haven't been out for socially gone out, say, even. No, but I'm saying I spend a lot of time at home. Yeah. I'm very happy at home. Really nice.

See, I don't see that because obviously I'm out all day, every day. Yeah. Then you forget, yeah, Natalie probably doesn't have to go out. Well, don't get me wrong. I'm doing the school run. I'm doing this. I'm going shopping. I'm doing this.

But if I wanted to, you could. From quarter to nine. You could be at home all day. Yeah. And I am. Don't leave off. But emails this. Yeah.

I'm doing stuff or I'm washing or I'm doing whatever. But yeah, I could easily just be at home. Well, yeah. I've seen it a bit like even with your brother, you know, where he's not been well and not socialising as much as he was. Of course. I, you know, I check in on him regularly now. Yeah.

Because I'm mindful that he's been. It's a long day. Yeah, it's a long day. I mean, don't get me. wrong, he's always quite liked his own company, as much as very, he's very social. He equally does very well with his own company. And we're lucky we have a nice size garden so he can pot her around in the garden. But I worry probably more than he does, because I know if I was at home all day on my own, I think I would genuinely struggle. I, yeah, I, I can, I can, I never

struggle. I'm never bored. Really? Ever? You're potter, you do this, you do that, you emails come in, you're thinking of new things. But then I've been walking. I've been going out for a good hour. Oh, so you're still doing your walking? Yeah, I've been doing it, a good hour, which... Again, that you're out then, aren't you? Oh, it's lovely. And it does make it a huge difference to how you think it's huge, massive. What, mad, isn't it? It's incredible. It's the physical act, isn't it? And that air, that fresh air. I don't feel like, I know people say they go to the gym and they love the gym and all of that, but the walking outside for me, is definitely what suits me.

Me too. It suits me. This is also from Natalie. And she said, I know you hear this a lot, but your pod has got me through some of the real dark times this year and I appreciate it every week.

Oh, Natalie. So good to hear that, isn't it? Yeah, I mean, it's better than anything. And again, we sound like a broken record, I know, but that makes this whole pod completely worthwhile, doesn't it? Nothing else matters. Whether we're just getting someone through another day, or putting a smile on someone's face

or making someone laugh out loud. Well, there was a glitch the other morning. My apologies for everyone. There was a glitch where I think the episode, Monday's episode was locked. And it was a patron only, but it was locked. Right. But the amount of people said,

I feel all discombobulated. I'm getting in the car, it's not there. Where is it? Where is there? Habitual things go on. And it really made me realise that's really important. I'm sorry.

It's a tech issue. And it was all sorted within a couple of hours. But again, for people, it threw them because that's their little routine. Their little routine. Yeah. It's really important. And that's why it's so important, even through, yeah, the month of December. And that's why, again, that's another added pressure, a good one.

Yeah. I want to make sure all the pods are coming out and I'm not, you know, slacking on them and just popping out a load of crap. I want it to be good. And I'm thinking of those and I'm looking at dates. So, yeah. Hey, I have struggled with my mental health since losing my day. last year. I've had 11 years of death, close relatives with cancer, etc. I don't think we

realise the toll it takes until everything settles down. In February, I decided I needed to get my spark back and started strength training. It really helped with my confidence, posture, and help me to start laughing at the little things. I have recently took a dip on Dad's one year anniversary, but I've realised the power of being outside. Fresh air, trees, the beach and walking. It's taking me long enough, laughing face. Alongside these things, your podcast features heavily. And I try really hard to do something creative for half an hour a day.

I find it meditative and it relaxes me. Knitting, sewing, embroidery, cross stitch, hand-piece in quilts, crochet. I love it all. I'm still working full-time. so that half an hour a day is so good. Lastly, I have learnt that you do need to look after yourself and afford yourself the same compassion, care and time that you would give to someone else.

I think the majority of us put ourselves last. It's not about being selfish, it's important. Thank you for all you do, Karen. And again, she's saying all the things. It's absolutely, we are trained, I feel, and I don't know why it is I don't know it's how we've been brought up

or magazines and articles we've read, television we watch and now social media but you know it can't be social media for me because that's not been around long enough

so I think it's all of the media that we have been seen all the material we've been shown or family members when we're listening to people talk

as we grow up we are made to feel guilty if you are doing something for yourself for yourself if it is a past time and that's such a bad trait you are

made to feel like that is wrong. If I want to sit down and write something for half an hour, I should do that. But I don't, I'll potter about and I think, oh, I'll hoover that room and do. Actually, it's probably better for me to sit and do something I enjoy doing. Be that writing, be that looking at a painting. And it just feels that is so indulgent. Yeah. It's lazy almost.

There's no disrespect to men. I mean, Dave doesn't feel guilty going golf on a Saturday for nine hours. Imagine if we did that. Imagine me disappearing for nine hours playing a sport or going trekking or whatever. It might be. Just wouldn't, you just couldn't. I would feel so guilty. Well, there you go.

And we shouldn't. No, no. And we're talking about half an hour and hour. Do you what I do do? I mean, I don't do it regularly enough. Yeah. What I find very relaxing. I'm very fortunate to have a neighbour who's a beautician.

Yes. It's the odd facial or massage. And I'm pleased you do so. That's what I do. It's just come to me. That's something, but when I feel like I've had a tough few months and my shoulders are starting to feel like, you know, they ache, you can feel your head on your shirt, your neck.

I put myself in for a facial or a massage and that is a real treat. Yeah, please. That's lovely. That really soothes me, helps me relax. She's next door, so if you do it late, you can roll into bed. Exactly that. Do you sleep better once you've done that? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Because it's a complete, well, you're a completely, imagine. It's an hour and a half. Maria will do an hour and a half, soft music, candles lit. Yeah, it's lovely. It really is lovely. Now, that I enjoy it.

I'm pleased you do that. That's good. See? And I highly recommend that. We've got something out of it in the end. There you go. Just remembered that. But shows that I'm overdue one as well.

But that's a lovely. But again, that is. But again, it's a cost. I know. It's cost. Razz walking is free. Fresh air is free. But, you know, every now and then, again, it's something, a gift.

Yes, it's a lovely gift. Or you can save up for a budget for it. Yeah. It's a lovely, relaxing. I never do anything like that. You do? No. Whenever I do have a massage.

It's like a sports massage for you, isn't it? But whenever I have one, anyone who's having given me a massage, said you're knotted. Yeah, I remember, do you remember back in the day? You used to book someone to come to yours and we'd all have that. Alison. Yeah, do you remember that? It was so good. But she used to say, Natalie, please, you've got to do this every six weeks.

But then you should be doing it. Even if you don't do it every six weeks, Natalie, it's so good for you. Any massarers, like, I've never known a body like it where it's so tight. Yeah, that's so bad. There you go. Do you think us women have to be so much more resilient? than men have to be. We've got to keep it all...

Going? Yeah, we've got to put on a... I'm... I'm okay. I can do X, I can do Y, I'm going to do Z. I don't think so. I think men do have a lot of stress in their own different ways.

Do you think they just hide it? I think they can hide it. I think we, because we're talkers, I think we're more comfortable talking to women about it. But I also think we are... made completely differently. We birthed children. If you just go back through

the history of time and you look at Hunter Garavarres and all of that, women, female animals, all of that, they are carers. They have sole responsibility in most cases, not all cases, but of children,

keeping things alive. It's that, whereas the man will go out and they'll get bits and they'll hunt and they'll grab stuff. But you're kind of the matriarchal figure. And I think that doesn't go away through time. So you believe in most families, the woman is the matriarchal. I do. Yeah. I do.

Correct me if I'm wrong. I'm probably wrong. Again, another pressure, isn't it? This is quite long, but it's good. Here we go. because I've got to talk about this going off piece a little bit. Hi, Nat, I've been through one hell of a journey with my mental health over the past few years. I'm post-menopausal and out of nowhere was hit with the worst anxiety and panic attacks I've ever experienced.

At times I genuinely thought I was losing my mind. I didn't recognise myself and I couldn't understand what was happening to me. Thankfully, I'm in a much better place now. I still have anxiety but I understand it better and most importantly, I've learned how to manage it rather than letting it manage me. That's good. Although I'm not going to pretend I've got it completely sussed, I still have the odd what the hell is happening to me moment.

What made such a huge difference was talking to people. Here we go again. My close friends and colleagues were incredible and honestly, I don't think I would have got through the worst of it without them. Just being able to say I'm struggling today without feeling judged was enormously important. What has really surprised me is how many people have since opened up to me about their own anxiety and panic attacks, things they'd never told anyone because they were worried they'd be seen as silly, dramatic,

or somehow not coping properly. It's made me realise just how many people are quietly struggling behind closed doors. That's why I think conversations about mental health are so important. Sometimes you don't need someone to fix you, you just need someone to listen and remind you that you're not going mad, that you're not alone, and you will get through it. Here we go for my rant. I have to say I find it incredibly frustrating

when people like Katie Hopkins mock someone such as Alison Hammond. Oh, I was going to bring that up. How funny. Whatever your opinions on someone, there is absolutely nothing funny about ridiculing a person for talking honestly about anxiety or vulnerability.

If anything, people who speak openly about these things are helping others feel brave enough to do the same. So, if you're struggling, talk to someone, a friend, a colleague, a family member, professional, anyone you trust, you might be amazed at how many people understand exactly what you're going through. And if nothing else, my experience has taught me that hormones can apparently decide to throw you into an existential crisis without so much as sending a memo first. Yeah, very well written.

Absolutely love the pod and it certainly helps me unwind and have a giggle, another very important thing for mental health. Yeah. Best wishes, Lisa. Again, laughing is a massive tonic. It's good to laugh. Laughing, finding. A real deep belly laugh is so refreshing.

Yeah. And it's interesting, I've not read that particular message. I must have missed that. Did you see? I saw a bit on social. I didn't see it. I saw a bit on social media. She's obviously had some kind of panic attack whilst.

She was hosting this morning? Yeah, and she was escorted. And she was escorted off. Wow. and obviously everyone was very, very concerned. And they've checked her heart over and whatever. And she's had a panic attack. Allegedly.

I have to say that in case I get sued. But it looks as if that way. That's what happened. And she took a picture of her selfie on Instagram because she does. It's Alison Hammond. She's amazing. With her gown on. Thanks so much for your thoughts.

But nothing, you know, don't worry. But I saw Katie Hoppe. I saw that on social media. Did you see what she called her? Yeah, I did. Well, I watched it. I watched her rant. basically implying that it was attention-seeking

and she kept referring to well her size I guess although she's not very big she referred to her a chuba something a chumba womba that was it something like that's terrible she

hang on I mean she's a brave the person and I'm old Katie Hopkins fucking appalling human being I hope she comes from me Monday. Oh, now you've said that. I think she will be right on now.

Oh, Katie, come around here. In fact, I'll invite you over. Let's have a discussion. She was clutching her chest, Alison. Now, no one, I'm not being rude. What if she had had a heart attack or a stroke, regardless? No, it doesn't matter. If she hasn't had one,

panic attacks can feel obviously like that. And again, it's a very distressing emotion that, you know, in the moment it can be extremely frightening and for poor Alison it's happened while she's on set Please tell me that ITV news main feature wasn't Alison Hammond who used to be a significant chumba womba

about the size of a brick shit shed to be quite honest with you because she thought she might have had a minor panic attack How is she allowed to put this out there? Unfortunately people are allowed to do what they want to do And unfortunately, because she's so far, people watch it. And what everyone needs to do is stop.

I know, but because it's so shocking, I watched it. I watched it. Because I thought, what's going on? I heard a little bit about it. Oh, I'm not reading about it because I heard. So again, she's getting her wish because everyone's talking about her. We shouldn't. We shouldn't talk about it.

We're giving her time. But I'll find it disgusting that people are allowed to call people those names. But what is she trying to prove? She just wants views, don't she? I don't know what she wants. She's not even in the country. I think she's on Alda or something. Why are you bothered?

You're not even, go away. She's doing what you want to do. And has Alison reacted to this? Has she? Her response was... She has reacted to it, is she? Her response was, which I don't know if I could do. No, I'm not sure mine would be classy either.

She said, I'm still a chumbawomba babs with a heart. I thought it was a heart attack and it was very scary. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. even you because you are beautiful on inside and out. Wow. Well done you. What a classy lady. Well, I'm not sure I would have called a beautiful inside and out. But I just can't believe that's allowed to, isn't there a thing that for Instagram to say you've got to block harmful content again going back to all that shit.

But I don't think that's not nice. Look, I'm all for freedom of speech. I'm all for people having their say. People can have their views, but you can't be rude like that. But that's rude. It's rude. And how's that been allowed to go out and not be blocked or removed or Chumba, what is you talking about?

I don't know. And again, she's undoing everything that we are trying to do, even by just doing this pod. Absolutely. Is make people be open about how they feel. How they feel. And what about people who maybe look like, Alison? or mate whatever

and they think oh my God am I a chumbo one book? It's disgusting No it's really not good It's really bad But please Katie We'd love to have you on our pod Oh pop on in

And we can have a right on On in here I've got some pretty important people coming up Katie You can be at the bottom of the list If you wish Because really I'd rather not speak to you

But I think my listeners Would really enjoy me Having a go at you I'd really like to speak to out Would you I find it quite interesting Yeah. I'd love to know what her underlying issues are. Oh, she's got some massive issues.

But, yeah, take us on. Go on. There's a, there's a, what's the word I'm looking for? Natalie, help me. Challenge. That's the word. Yeah, for you. Come and take on a couple of Cassidy's. Yeah, not good. It's not good at all. But Allison's taken it and dealt with it in a very professional way.

Absolutely. for her. Hi Natalie, Natalie. It's Lottie from Bista. You asked voice notes about what we do to clear our heads in terms of mental health. And I just thought I'd share a few of mine. They're probably a little bit cliche. I go for walks so I get out in nature. I find that really helps. I will try and focus my brain, whatever activity I'm going to do to help clear my head, I will focus my brain for whatever period of time that is. So if I can carve out 20 minutes to go on a walk or half an hour or an hour, great. And I'll plan whatever time I've got that day,

I'll plan roughly the route or roads I'm going to go down that I know I can achieve in that time. And then I'm sort of achieving something as I go. Same as if I'm in the garden and I know I've got, say, to squeeze sort of 45 minutes in the garden. I'll go out there and think, right, what can I actually achieve that's really noticeable in 45 minutes? So a little rough plan in my head, a little mental note. and then I'll sit out and try and do that so that I feel I'm achieving

and then I'm focusing my brain on that. It might also be that I sit down and play guitar or do a bit of songwriting, that will focus my brain. It might only have one hour as well, you know, once a month to do that in between cooking, cleaning, little one school runs, you know, looking after my mum,

whatever it might be. It's just squeezing in those little tiny pockets of 20 minutes here and there of stuff I know I really enjoy. Same as cooking. That will focus me for that period of time and I'll really enjoy that. And I just find focusing on one thing and achieving something to an end point means that I am achieving and I'm focused.

And it allows me more space in my brain to not let those little voices creep in that do. So, yeah, just wanted to share the little bits and bobs I do to try not let the internal monologue take over every now and again. Love to everyone. Stay well. And this is Lottie for Bista. Bye. Love Lottie. Is that Lottie that was on Saturday? Sure was. Lottie that slept in her camper van.

Yep. Lottie that slept in a graveyard. Did she? Are we allowed to say that? Well, she'd put it on Patreon that she survived the night. Is that Lottie? Sure that was Lottie. Unless we got two Lotties.

Oh, we might have a couple of Lotties. Who knows? But Lottie, we're going to do a Patreon on episode soon because again she's just such a lovely human I think it'll be a great chat into what she does. I get what Lottie's saying albeit my my what I do is not necessarily not saying I don't enjoy it because I like housework but um that's my cleanse completing a task you like doing don't you? Yeah massively so even if like I couldn't have the thought of say if I've got a busy weekend and I know I'm barely going to be at home I'd got to know that I've

done something that will just enhance. So be it cleaning out the sink drawer or doing out of the sock drawer or the fridge or cleaning out the fridge. Even if it's just that one job, then I know of achieve something, one less task to tackle. I get it. I need to go into that. Yeah. Because I do.

For me, that's very therapeutic. Bits, bits, bits, bits. And I think, don't feel you're getting anywhere. Completing something. Yeah. Well, we've said that to you with when you do a room up, haven't we? Oh, I can't do it. Yeah. And that is for me, like, yeah, I'm not.

But then that's the old self-diagnosed ADHD. Yeah, maybe. I won't start, I won't start, and like Dave wants to now start another job in terms of refurbishing, right? I will not do that until we have completed the drive. I'm waiting for the garage door to go on, the peer caps. No, I'll get that. I don't want to move on to the next job until the first one is complete.

I do get that. Even if that holds something back. I just need to know one, it's completely done, you move on. Which is why I used to say to you, when you do your room, your lounge, make sure you complete it. And you did, by your light vings. Do you remember it took you about two years to get like in. And I've got my pictures on the wall. I've got pictures to be framed because I'm not sure what I want that.

But again, I kind of get that. Yeah, but there are certain things that aren't done. My lamp's 15 years old. That's got to go in the bin. I need new light. So there are bits. Yeah. But yes, in terms of decoration.

But again, she's using it in a scenario, yeah, that for her, she's achieving something. And that clears her mind. No, it's... You have to find your own technique, your own skill set, your own, your own thing. Because we're all different. Absolutely. What might be, you know, for you, it might be more important to sit and read half a book or read a whole book or listen to someone else. It might be listened to a pod.

Someone else it might be going for that walk. But whatever it is that makes you feel better, you've just got to try and incorporate that within your day, within your week. And I think sitting here saying, going for a walk, going outside, da-da-da, that's all very well. And again, I'm always thinking of the worst-case scenario.

I always think of people, people who have, who are carers, carers, 24-hour carers to people. They can't get out on their own. They don't get a break. That's really difficult. Again, conversation, cups of tea. Yeah.

And young moms, young moms with babies. Get the pram, knackered. Yeah. It's like jet lag when you've had a baby. Yeah. Absolute jet lag. If you can't have a baby and everyone's asking you, when you can have a baby?

Why haven't you got a baby? Like a stabbing in the heart every time. There's so many different scenarios that we have to face, that they're all different. You will find a little bit of comfort in something. And that's what we're trying to say. Yeah, and that's why it's the important to find. that bit of comfort, you know.

And again, it is that, I remember that. I remember the feeling of being at home all day with the children, and it was so hard. It was so hard. And I just remember literally Dave would, I could hear the key go in the door because he'd have a long day at work. That key was going to go in the door and I'd literally be like, here you go, I'm just going to have 20 minutes to myself

and I just literally have to just lock myself in the bathroom. I'm just having this to myself. You know, again, really, I should have to be. going out, I should have said, I'm going for a walk. You know, I see it with Annalisa, she's got her trainer, or you just got to have that time away. Yes. Outside of the house to know that, no, for that 10 minutes.

You're on your own. Yeah, no one, you're not responsible for anyone. Just for that half an hour, that's such a pressure, isn't it? Now, whether that's looking after an elderly person, children, her child. Anyone? You're whoever, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Well, that was a quick hour.

Yeah, is it really an hour? Yes, it's a huge topic. We haven't got through half the messages we've got. We've got through a few. Thank you so much. We just wanted to acknowledge it because obviously, as you say, Saturday. No, and it's an important little date in the calendar.

Try and have a tea in a talk with someone on Saturday. Maybe pick up the phone to someone you're not spoke to for ages. The other thing I wanted to say is remember sometimes we did. I think it was a message we had, so it's not just me saying this, sometimes it's the people that are always checking in on other people might need checking in on that they might need a little checking in on

and a how are you or if you've not heard someone for ages and in your head you think oh I wonder how they are just pick the phone up it's not awkward just even his text or a voice note

which is a bit more personable I feel sometimes just pick it up go I thought of you how you're doing I'm massively busy but I thought of you it could make someone's day

I did it Sunday to two friends. That's good. Did exactly that. I'm terrible for it and I'm going to do it. I'm terrible. It could just be a simple high thinking of you? It goes a long way. It does.

But what we will definitely be doing of continuing to do these events that we're, well, like what you hosted on Saturday. Absolutely. Getting people together. Getting people together. For a lot of people, especially people that haven't maybe got a massive circle of friends or female, a network, family network. It's also something to look forward to.

Something to put down in your calendar. You know it's coming. And it's something you can, you know. And again, I know these things can be a lot of money. Not everybody's got the money. You've got plenty of notice. You can save up for it, can't you? Or I'm even thinking of it would be lovely to do a live Patreon one night

where you tell everybody, grab a cup of tea, grab a beer, whatever you want, and we go live. Right. And then people can chat and we're here and we can have a chat, even if it's half an hour. Something nice, something free for people on Patreon. I know Patreon, six, seven quid or whatever, but it's a couple of coffees a month.

It's not a massive, massive issue. You can join Patreon. There's loads of bonus material on there. And again, that community is building. You can see people what they're doing in the week. People are talking. That's www. Patreon.com forward slash life with Nat.

And remember, I will write all of the numbers I said at the beginning down in case you need somebody who isn't family, isn't friends, and you feel low and you want to talk to them. You're not failing doing that. It's really brave to pick up the phone. Absolutely. Really brave. We pick up the phone enough, don't we? We certainly do. We don't actually.

Not as much as we used to. I do love the old phone. Yeah. We don't do it as much as we used to. But then again, because before I knew, I kind of, your extenders, you had a routine. I did. So I kind of knew when you were available. Yeah.

And we've kind of lost that. But, you know. And I have to tell you that my routine in the morning has changed. Just end on a lighter note. They have put fucking roadworks in. It's just the most ridiculous thing for the school run you've ever seen in your life. It's now taking me 25 minutes longer to get back here for Joni. Gosh.

And that's a long time in the morning, isn't it? Added to your normal. It's a good hour and 10, hour and 15. Now I'm 15. How long are they going to be there for? I don't know, about eight weeks, ten weeks. Nightmare. That's not great for the old stress levels either, is it?

But I can call you. Yeah, you sure. If Jane shuts up, stops talking. Bless her little heart. She loves a chat. She loves a chat. She doesn't mind talking. Then I will talk to you very, very soon.

You will indeed. Thank you, everybody. We've got James' little birthday at the weekend. That'll be lovely. James was two. Obviously, it was yesterday. You'll be listening to this. James was two.

And he's got chatty as well. See, someone else for us to talk to. I just had a full-on conversation with him on the phone. He's brilliant. Bye, darling. Yes. Hi, you, nonna. Ice, baby.

It's adorable. I can't believe this too. Right. Okay. Speak soon. Oh, 7-8-20191919. If you want to send any messages regarding this subject, do. I can put them in our group.

We can do this again. again in a few weeks or a few months, you know what we're like. It's lovely to keep things going, keep things which are important going. So thank you for listening. Follow, subscribe, tell your friends. I have a fantastic weekend and I'll see you on Monday. Oh, you'll hear me on Monday. Bye, Lynn.

Bye all. Bye, bye.