Life with Nat - LWN198: Scraping the Barrel #37 - Shoes vs kitchen floor

Episode Date: February 5, 2026

So many topics, so little time! The third Christmas cake, Mouse Saga revisited, an aNATomy lesson, Shoes on in the house, Panto, and Marc’s colour palette Enjoy!! xx Please subscribe, follow, and leave a review. xxx You can find us in all places here; ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podfollow.com/lifewithnat/view⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ We're on Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/lifewithnatpod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Nat's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natcass1⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Marc's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@camera_marc⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Niece's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@natsnieces⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Tony's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@tonycass68⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Linny's insta: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@auntielinny.lwn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ MORE LIVE SHOWS! 07/02/2026 Brighton, The Forge ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TICKETS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 08/02/2026 Newcastle upon Tyne, The Stand ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TICKETS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 25/02/2026 Folkestone, Quarterhouse ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TICKETS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 28/02/2026 Colchester, Arts Centre ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TICKETS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 07/03/2026 Manchester, Fairfield Social Club ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TICKETS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 22/03/2026 Leeds, The Wardrobe ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TICKETS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 29/03/2026 Bristol, The Gaffe - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TICKETS⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Book Club: February's Book - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anything by Sophie Kinsella ⁠⁠https://www.sophiekinsella.co.uk/books/⁠⁠ Nat’s solo chats - any rants always welcome. We're talking big career changes, the constant comparisons with others on social media... and the audacity of teenagers! Scraping the Barrel - SCAN AND SHOP VIRGIN NO LONGER! Bonce vs list! - Are you a list maker? Always collecting for Nostalgia Fest! What’s brewing with the Nieces - AGEING & non-negotiables Things we’re nagging with Linny about - More lateness stories and some cleaning questions, please! The Tony talks chatter - Keep your DIY questions coming. What are your favourite films & albums? What’s the show Tony’s going on about? And is there any way they'd legally be able to continue their holiday if that happened on the boat? Cold water swimmers and shower’ers… convince us A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[e-mail]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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It's taking me ages to catch up on the Christmas-y type pods. but I'm really concerned about the little mouse that Mark got rid of what about his family you've taken him away from his family they probably live in the field next to your house I'm not a stalker you have talked about the field by your house

yeah so I am a bit worried now either the mum or dad mouse just lost their baby mouse or baby mouse has lost their mum and dad yeah this is going to keep me up all night Anyway, see later. Emma's extremely worried about the mouse situation. Well, if it's any consolation, there's not been any other mouse.

Mice. Mouses. Mice. It's these, isn't it, that are mouses? The clicky things that you use on your computer, I'm referring to. What, if you have two of those? That's two mouses. You don't call them mice. Interesting. I'm sure that's correct.

I'm sure someone will let us know if that's not the case. She's right, though, really, when you think about it. I know, but we're not killing them, are we? I know, but you are taking them out of their environment. We're not taking a piece of M&S, fine, it's Cornish Cruncher and sticking it onto a traditional trap, are we, and saying, come on, mouse. No. Come have a little nibble.

I want to waste it. Bang. Splattered. Oh, don't. Everywhere. We don't do that. We use a nice, human. main trap.

Bit of peanut butter and then they get the benefit. The peanut butter is quite bewildering to me. Why is that? Because I never knew that they had a little poncho on for peanut butter. Well I think they eat quite a few things.

But they then get the benefit after nibbling on the peanut butter. Well actually they don't even get to nibble on it to be fair. They smell it. Go in the trap, bang. Little door closes. They're stuck. I need a little Perspex box. Yeah.

And when I go to the snack cupboard to get out some Krispies, I get shut in the box, I'll just have a sniff. No, I can do that. What we can do is we'll just plumb up a couple of the door handles to the mains.

Which means? It just means that when you touch the door handle we get a little shock and you'll walk away from the door. Could do the fridge. We could just basically take the earth off the floor. fridge. Same difference, I suppose. No, the fridge is fine for me. It's crisps. Little shock. I haven't had a bag of crisps or any crisps since Christmas, really.

And it's quite difficult. Why is it difficult? Because I love them. I really love them and I miss them. Okay. Just have some crisps, Natalie. You on the other hand, I thought we could talk about Christmas food and things. Lovely. Although I've banned the word. but the chocolate eating seems to have continued throughout the whole of January and into February. It has, but I've tried to kind of balance that out a little bit

because we've been lucky enough to be going to the gym. So I've sort of done loads in the gym and then eating that box of chocolates that came with your hamper. And then I've done more in the gym and had another box of chocolates. Does that not make you feel annoyed though? Yes. When you've done that work.

Yes. And then you eat loads of chocolate? Yes. It does, yeah. Because it's kind of... Yeah. You could not go to the gym and just not eat the chocolate. Absolutely right. So the moral of the story is, Natalie, stop with the chocolates.

I don't buy them. Put them in a bin. I can't do it. I have got no self-control. So I'm quite good. I'm quite good with the crisps. Beginning of January, I was thinking, I made a third Christmas cake. I couldn't just leave.

it, it's wasteful. You've had a piece of Christmas cake every day. Plus, around, being honest now, I'd say at least after dinner, a slice of Christmas cake. Not for a couple of weeks, this Christmas cake, because I ate it all in about five days. No, if this is gone, but a slice of Christmas cake, and then around six chocolates, at least.

Yeah, possibly. At least. It's not good. Just get it at the house. I don't know. I have to say. And I'll stop eating it. But I don't know how you're not sick. I love it.

love it. I love cakes. And chocolate. And then last night, Eliza made an amazing banana bread. I haven't had any yet. It's amazing. Yeah, I must have a little bit. She also made the same night, she did a chocolate brownie. I mean, it's not good for me. Just like you say, it's a waste of time. I know, but it is really good to be able to have things in the house and not eat them. I can't do it. I'm terrible. You're fine with crisps though, aren't you? I love a crisp. No, you never have a... I've never ever seen you go to the cupboard and have a pocket of crisps.

It's a balance. No, but you would never do that. Yeah. After dinner. Yeah. I've never seen you at eight, half eight, nine o'clock, watching the telly, go and get a packet of crisps. It's fair enough.

Ever. Fair enough. But the mice situation, going back to Emma's message. Yeah. Okay, they've had to spend a couple of hours probably in the trap, but they didn't get a little drive of me in the morning. And I love a driver with you. They're very fortunate.

I think what she was talking about was not being with their family anymore. Where was their family when they were on their own in the cupboard rummaging around? Didn't care then, did they? That's true. So why they bothered now? The fact that their son or daughter has been picked up in a humane trap and been driven the other side of our village across the A-1. 414 and then delivered somewhere else, not my fault.

Don't let your mice, children, rummaged around our cupboards. And actually, since the precautions up there and plays, they've gone. Do you think they have posters, they ring each other, lost child? They haven't got phones, have they? So they don't ring each other, no. Oh, you don't know that? It's crazy.

You do not know. They've got mobiles, have they? They could easily have a small mobile. They could easily. What was interesting was the fact that we found mouse droppings in the living room next to the kitchen. Yes. And the irony was there was lots of mouse droppings around Joni's mouse house. Yeah, it was weird.

Now, how funny would it have been? To see them all in there, in the bed. Actually, it's chilling out. But they've got the whole place built. I mean, they must have been like, come on, come and look at this. It's got a mansion. Yeah. Three extra room.

attached to it. There's a garden, there's a patio area. Yeah, come on. Fantastic bar. Get out of cold. Get out of cold. Come and see this.

Well, you don't know what's been going on. It's like Madam Two Swords for them. But look at it. It looks like Grandad Alfie. Can you imagine? Like poking at the stuffed mice just in the little baby mine. I'll have to put a picture up.

I mean, it could be. I'll have to put a picture up in the mouse house. The thing is, I've squirted that foam, as I've previously said, on the viral video. But I put the foam into the orifices. Viral video, sorry.

Sorry. Fuck it out. Don't get too big for your boots. Viral video. It was my video. It's not a... All right, you know what I'm saying? The video that people were messaging us about.

Yes. It's not a viral video. You know what I mean. I do know what you mean. The point is... By the way, someone did message and said, you can't use expanding foam. They eat through it and they're 100% correct.

But the foam that I used was designed for mice. It's mouse foam, is it? Anti-mouse foam. Yes. Why is that? Is it harder than normal foam? Because mice can eat through expanding foam. Yeah, so this one, is it harder? I'll let you look it up. Here you go.

Here you go. Oh, this is riveting. It's called mouse barrier foam. Really? Yes, because a listener kindly messaged me and said, Mark, you've really mucked up here, you've used expanding foam. And they eat through it. And I said, don't you worry.

This foam is a special anti-mouse foam. Very good. So we're all good. And it's worked. We now sit here now, a month down the line. No mice. No mice. Unless they're in a mouse house, can we ever notice?

Can we get the mouse traps out of all of the places? I like them, but they're in the insurance policy. I really, I really don't want them there. They're in our garage now, though. They've moved. You know that? What, the mice? Oh, no, I don't mind the garage, though.

Oh, yeah. Fine. As long as they're not in the house, it's fine. Okay. Fine. It's going to go on Facebook then, start reading some messages, but I realise I'm doing a podcast of you. You're doing the same.

No, I was looking at what we're doing now. Okay. Although the phone addiction is quite severe at the moment. I was listening to Parrington Hell today, and Josh and, Rob were talking about their phone addictions. And I think it's quite bad at the moment for you. There's a message, by the way, from somebody else about the mice.

Addic behaviour. As I came in from doing the school run today, we walked past the kitchen. Correct. And Joni went, we were with someone else, the parent of one of Johnny's friends. There's mummy, look. And yeah, you were on your phone. Working. Emails.

Yes, she was on our phone. Scott had message. tried emails. I was sorting out dates. I'm talking about the morning and bedtime. Okay. That is what I'm talking about. Okay.

Just be honest. Yeah. Just let it out. Bring it in. I'm not addicted to my phone. And if you want to go down the road now, we can do it now. Get your screen time.

Evening. Get your screen time. Let's do it now, live. I'm talking about evening. I'm talking about evenings. Screen time. How do I do that? Give me your phone.

No, I can do it. No, no, no. It's all right. We can do it. It's all right. I'm on my phone all the time. I haven't said that I'm not on my phone all the time, by the way. Oh, right.

I haven't said that. No. I'm saying that it's an issue. And everyone moans about children, but I think adults are just as bad. You said, I'm addicted to my phone. My problem with you. Nothing during the day I'm talking about going to bed and having it and scrolling. And as soon as you open your eyes in the morning.

But it says on there, what time you start looking and what time you finish looking. So we can compare that as well. That sounds good. Okay. Does that, but does that include an alarm if you're pressing an alarm off? No, it doesn't. Seven hours and 31 minutes is a daily average. Sorry, seven hours.

Yeah. Daily average is seven hours. Well, today, 50% up from last week. But I was in the gym and I was watching for an hour and a half some podcast videos. So it could be that. What's yours? What was it, what was it yesterday? My average is three hours and 12 minutes a day.

Show me? Can I see it? No. Oh, wow. No, this is like trumps. I'm not giving my cards away. That's today. Can I have a look at yours? Seven hours 30.

Can I have a little look at yours? Absolutely. Four hours 18. But you've been out a lot of the day. Mm-hmm. Yeah, and also, I'm not being rude. If you look at the actual things, you've like, wait. for an hour.

That's what I'm saying. I do four hours driving today. Google Maps and stuff is counted in that. Okay. Anyway, I get the point, on the phone a lot. I am on the phone loads. My biggest thing for us is I would love when we go to bed,

I don't go on my phone when I get into bed. Fair enough. And when you wake up in the morning, it's very, very bad. The first thing you do is to do that, to let all that blue light in and all of that information you should get up calmly and just have half an hour

when you're not looking at your phone. Okay. That's all I'm saying. Not saying I'm not on my phone a lot. Hi, Nat. Hi, everyone. Long time listener here. And I've messaged you a few times

and sent a few voice notes. I just had to voice note to talk about your last pod with Mark, talking about the mice. It was so funny. Maybe I'm just too much of an empath, right? But all I could think about, when Mark was saying that he caught the mouse

and took it in the little box and drove it away and then let it free was, oh my God, Mark has taken that mouse away from his mouse family. Not another one. Like that mouse is going to be let free and be like, where am I? I'm away from all my mouse family. I don't know if I was the only one that I thought that, but it just made me laugh.

It's Amy here from Bulldoch in Hertfordshire. And yeah, I just had to share that because honestly, when I was listening, that was the only thing I was thinking about because I understand the reasoning behind it. But the whole time I thought that poor mouse, he's been taken away from his mouse family. But yeah, love you all. Bye. Amy, I completely agree with you. And the thing is, It is better that the little mouse is alive and gets, you know, let out again into the wild.

But I know what you mean about the family. I feel bad now. What about the voice note from the lady who had the mice in the car? Oh my goodness. Amazing. And do you know how many times I've thought about that voice note since I've heard it? Hi, Natalie. This is Zoe from Ardley in Hertfordshire.

Lovely place. I have not long listened to your... your pod with Mark and you were talking about mice at home and I just wanted to tell you my story about mice at home. So we live in a little village so it's sort of surrounded by fields and obviously we have issues with mice and it was one time when my car had to go in because there was a few issues with it. So when they investigated and they took the back seat out to see because there's heated seats weren't working and realized the mice had a lovely time in there, chewed away lots of wiring and some of the seat belts and the seat underneath. So there was foam everywhere.

Obviously going through insurance for this and further investigation, I then get a call basically telling me my car's been written off. Obviously I was a bit shocked and thought they were joking and no further investigation, they literally have done a lot of damage and chewed through quite a lot. I never sort of really found out just how much or whereabouts, but obviously, luckily, it wasn't anything to do with the break. But I was told, you know, it was not a car I could ever drive again, quite an expensive car as well, hadn't had it very long, probably about a year. So it was horrifying. So we now have. little traps everywhere and we've even considered getting a feral cat so we can save our cars.

So yeah, I just thought I'd tell you that little story and sorry I've gone over a minute. The poor mouse is families. That's terrible, isn't it? They've written a car off. That is mad. Yeah. I bet everyone I've got humane traps now. I bet those mice weren't doing the old January diet, were they?

And are we sure that wasn't like rats Eating through brake pipes Well Surely I mean that's quite extreme I thought about that a lot though Since I heard that voice note What was you thinking?

Just thinking about it. Just thinking about your car Well I just think about your car Why? Because the mice would just go in there, wouldn't there Because it's food everywhere Your car stinks No, do you know what it did

It absolutely stank yesterday Yeah And then I realised I cleared it all out and it's fine today. It was a couple of old coffee cups with a bit of coffee in the bottom. Yep, next time you look in there, there'll be some mice just chilled out. Just chilling out. But they have to get in? Yeah. They can get for anything. They get for a pencil. Oh, here we go. The old pencil test. That was funny. Debbie said the pencil test is about the saggy boobs. Yes. So what's that? A pencil from where?

Brought back many a memory. Many a memory. Of what? The old pencil. Reading about the pencil test. We did it at school. What do you mean? We talked about it at school. What, if a woman has saggy boobs? Yeah, if it was in like PHSA or something.

No, it wasn't. What is it? How does it work then? You'd be alright. No, mine are so low, my boobs. My boobs and nipples are nearer to my belly button than they are my arms, shoulders. That is actually true.

Sorry, it is. That's a nice image, isn't it? That's life. So you mentioned the gym earlier? Yeah. And you've been enjoying it, haven't you? I've sort of been enjoying it. Before Christmas, you were like, we're never going to go.

I'm never going to get any time to go. No. And I said, people, you just fit it into your life. I've been trying. You've done really well. Yeah, I've done all right. I wish it was sort of, you know, paying dividends, but for some reason, nothing seems to be happening.

Oh, Mr. Bloody Ferreira, Ross. over there. However, you do fit it in. Yeah. When there's somewhere to go that's nice, we have been fitting it in

as a family and I think it's really, really good for us. Yeah, it's been good. Have you had any embarrassing gym stories, any etiquette, any weird things happen?

Hang on, are you talking about the naked people in a changing room? Well, I'm just following on from conversations I've had with others. All right, but the same applies, if you're interested. Is that what you're asking?

you're interested. I'm interested to see if you've had any... It's for same. It's for saying. Very odd. Just blokes wondering about. A lot of that, yeah. Very odd. Or do you do?

It's wondering about. You wonder about. That one's going to look at me, are they? I've got no worries. I'm fine. No, but do you wonder about, Nate? No, I can't imagine. Absolutely, I do.

No, you don't. It's impractical not to. What I'm going to do with someone of his little towels that's shimmy about? Like, of course, I just that. Who cares? Do you really? Yes. That really surprises.

No. No. It's not my first rodeo. I've been to a few gyms. It's fine. I had the towel today. Right. And I just, someone was there. Well, you just have a roundy waist, by the sounds of things. No. This one of my heartages, I don't need to do this. Look at this. Cover everything up around my waist. According to you, nonsense, isn't it? Rubbish.

But I had the tail around me. Rony waist, yeah. And I was going to try and put my costume on. I took my knickers off and then I was getting my costume on. And it was actually just too difficult to do. Just do it. So I did just do it. Do you just face away?

Do you face it into the lockers? Well, interestingly, I don't know who wants to see my bottom. Oh, so you go for the other way? Yeah, I don't know what's worse. I don't know, I just get very, I'm not sure. Yeah, I don't read. It's an interesting concept though, isn't it? And it's a slippery slope.

And you know what? I'm not going to go there. But it does make you think when I'm standing there naked, I mean, no one's looking at me. but there are definitely people, I will say one thing, as a bloke. Most of the time it's just normal men getting changed and it's fine. Whatever normal is. Not what I mean?

Not really. But two things, two things from the change room, two bits of news. One, there are definitely men that are very interested in you watching them getting changed, in my opinion. I mean, that's a controversial statement, but I think it's true. They're interested in you watching you, watching them. I get that. I get that. I think they're quite... Yeah, yeah, I would say...

They're overly confident. Not for any obvious reasons. Yeah, but I think that's the same as anybody that's in the gym who's overconfident. And they like you watching them work out. And they're grunting and... Maybe. There's that. Another observation, or not even observation,

but a story from the change room in the male part of the gym, there's a lot of sand on the floor. Pardon? Lots of sand. shit. Really? Oh, I shouldn't say that. Swimming.

So, like, I'm getting changed. And I can just feel a bit of, I'm clean. There's a bit of grit on the... It's just where people have got, like, dirty shoes and have gone in the changing rooms and got changed. It's horrible, isn't it? And I was thinking... Is that more of an issue with men's changing rooms?

Yes, there's nothing on the floor. This is like tradesmen going in and out, and people that have been outside. Like me, me even. I've been outside. I just wondered. Women do go outside. They do venture into the outdoors.

Yeah, I know that, but they don't tend to work there, do they? You know, they're not working there in, like, steel toe caps. Might be. Going down a very slippery path there, Marcos. I know. Well, I've already, I've already said that. I'm just talking about on the majority. I have to say that the women's changing room floor,

apart from being a little bit wet at times, I've never felt any sand or grit. So I do think you're right about maybe tradesmen going in and out, what have you? But no, it's the same sort of experience. But it's horrible, though, is it? Isn't it? Isn't it awful when the floor is unclean? The floor bit, yes.

It's horrible, isn't it? I hate it. And it's so horrible when you're in, you know, not even in your own home. Yeah. And it's uncomfortable like that. But to be in your own home and on a daily basis, feel sand and grit on the floor and mud. Have you scripted this?

And stones, lumps of mud off of boots. Horrendous. In your own kitchen. That's a real shitter, isn't it? What you reckon? Because I sweep our floor on a daily basis. And today, I swept the floor, having not swept it yesterday. Shocking.

Because I was out all day. You know, yesterday night, I did look at the floor, I think. It's been at least 24 hours since this floor was swept. So I sort of licked it and went, the state of this. I mean, I sent almost sent you a message about it and said... I was out all day. Get the old mop out again. I was out all day.

Right. At the theatre, which was lovely, Hartford Beam. Oh, right, yeah. That was so lovely with Hartford Orchestra. Really, really enjoyable day. But anyway, didn't get around to cleaning the floor, sweeping the floor. No. And it was like the contents of...

Well, I don't know what. It was like 400 people had been round. and I'd all walked in with their shoes on, I cannot explain to you the pile of shit that I swept up today. I don't know how it's possible. And I tell you what, I do. Stop walking around in your shoes in the kitchen.

Stop it. Okay. I know it's because you're busy and you're in, you're out, you're rushing around. What we're talking about? the floor. I know, I know you are, I know why it's like it. You get in, you've been to the railway.

You've got stuff in a box. You need to go outside. You've got to walk through. You've got to do this. You're always busy. I get that. It's very, very good that you're not a lazy person. You want to get things away.

You want to walk around. But you've got crocs for that. That's what crocs are for. You take your shoes off as soon as you come in and you have crocs at the other end of the house. And that's what they're, I don't want our kitchen floor to be dirty and it remains clean for about an hour. You want to be able to eat our dinner on fat floor, don't you?

No, I just want it to be clean. I want to walk around in my socks and them not be black. Fair enough. That's all I'm asking. Funnily enough, something came up on Instagram and I think you are one of these. It's a lovely word. A Tids optimist is someone who's always late

Because they believe they have more time than they actually do You are a Tids optimist No, I'm not I think you are very optimistic And when you're leaving the house I'm normally 25 minutes early for work Work And I'm normally at work

I do think you run out of time sometimes I do That's where the shoes come in that's where you're running about a bit with the shoes on inside it's practicalities I'm the one who mopped the floor so I just think

oh I just mop the floor again I can normally do I pick your pardon Who was the last person genuinely Me Saturday Sorry Sunday morning And prior to Sunday morning

Who mocked the floor? You When? I don't know actually When you were recording a Tony Talks I mopped the whole floor That's right Because I made a mess on the floor

No I walked in Oh I did but my cocks on did I muddle over the floor It's just those habitual things That make life easier Shoes off immediately As soon as you get him

On that note I've got a few things to question you about Absolutely In the shower Yes Okay Why does every single Vessel

Containing shower gel Or moisturiser Or conditioner Have the lid open All the time Always lid open Never close it

Never closed So by the time I pick up my shower gel. Yeah. It's just been contaminated with water. Because the lid's been open all the time.

Don't use your shower gel. No, I know you don't, but you leave the lid open. No. I'm not touching it. I'm not touching yours. Oh, strange. But I do, I have to say I have ones that are

like little poppy lids. Popper lids. Pump. Pumps. No, not a pump No Very, can't really explain it Not a lid as such

Sort of a press down And then your opening's there So you just press it down Type of thing But you are right about that Now for me I have a bit of a bad back I've got a very weak

weak back And bending down To shut the lids on the bottle Is a bit of a risk for me So I choose to just leave them open I tell why that's funny Pay the picture You are right though

I don't close the bottles No Anyway We've had some lovely messages on Facebook actually So thank you for those everyone Becky Randall said Scraping the barrels are my favourite I'd love to know whether there's any part of you Nat

that has become a little bit of a train fan From Mark's hobby Our son is a huge train fan And we've been here, there and every to indulge his passion, including losing our spare room to his model railway layout. I'd never confess to him, but I think I also now enjoy it almost as much as he does. It's lovely, isn't it? Who is that from?

Becky. Oh. I would say, there is definitely a little bit of me. No, I do. I enjoy the really nice heritage railways, like the Bluebell Railway. I haven't been there for about 10 years? No, and the Romney Hive and Dim Church Railway. I really like those.

Not been in there for about eight years. But I do like those. In terms of being a train enthusiast. No. No, apart from watching, what's his name? That nice man. Tim? Tim Dunn?

No, the famous one. Fred Dipler? No, the famous one. Michael Water. No, the one we watch on Instagram. Oh, Francis? Francis. Right, okay.

I like watching him. So the answer is, no, you're not interested. Right, moving on, next message. Lindsay Porritt. Lindsay said absolutely my favourite when you are spending time on the pods with Mark. So enjoyed seeing you in Crawley. I'd love to know if Mark ever gives you an opinion

on what you are wearing. And if he does, do you take notice or brush it off like I do with him indoors and buy another outfit? Track down a lovely green dress you were wearing last year and got one for myself, good old M&S. Thank you, Lindsay. I know the green dress.

I know that green dress Do you? Yes, I can absolutely picture that. I would say Lindsay that that Martin never gives an opinion on what I'm wearing. He'll always say if I look lovely, he'll say, oh, you look nice. But I can be in what I'm in now,

which is just usually what I'm in, track suit, leggings, whatever, and he'll say I look lovely. And even if I get really dressed up, he'll say I look lovely. So it doesn't really matter, which is really nice. I can know whatever I want.

Hang on a second. So you're saying I don't give an opinion on what you're wearing. No, you'd never say to me, oh, that's not right. No. You wouldn't give me an opinion. But I do compliment you. Oh, yeah, that's what I just said.

You compliment me. I think that's what Lindsay was saying, possibly. No, she said an opinion. She said, does he give an opinion? Because there are men within a couple, man and woman like us, and the man is more interested in fashion. Yeah, that's very strange. No, it isn't strange.

It's not strange. Oh, God. Like, Jack loves buying clothes, loves it. He loves shopping. Does he comment on what Elia's wearing? I would imagine he does, yeah. I don't know if he's got, I don't know if he's got an opinion, but she will definitely say what you think of this and have you.

You would never go online and go, oh, this would be nice for you. No, no chance. No. Generally speaking, I just think you look attractive, wearing whatever you're wearing. And interestingly, even tonight, I said you look really good in that. And you said, oh, it's ridiculous. I've looked at it, blah, blah, all this nonsense, nonsense, nonsense, whatever. That's fine.

But I am honest about that. And I genuinely believe that unfortunately some ladies feel like, I mean, I don't understand. I mean, if you were really into clothes and it was like a hobby, if it was like your hobby, your thing. If I was really into the design of women's clothing, I'd really be bothered about what you were wearing. I'd talk about it. I'd ask questions. I'd make comments. I'd say stuff.

I'd suggest stuff, I'd buy you stuff. I'd, you know. But to be honest with you, I find you very attractive, generally, wearing whatever you wear. And so I don't... Should have gone to the spec savers. Yeah. Well, now I wear these.

Things have changed. But you know what I mean? I do know what you mean. I very rarely will comment. And it's normally very sincere. But then you don't look at clothes for yourself. Well... Yeah, there's certain things you like that you will get.

Yes. You care about the sizing of them, but you've got certain things you'll buy, but I've never seen you sit on ASOS swimming through men's clothes. No, no, definitely not. But I've got enough clothes. I've got loads of clothes.

What's funny, I tell you so, I wasn't even going to say about it tonight, actually. So I've got a quiet month. I'm not really bothered. Like this beard and like what I look like and stuff. It's like, I'm very, I mean, I'm normally like that anyway.

I don't really care. I'm very chilled. Very lucky because you're very chilled. You don't pull me up on what I look like. Never. Only if you've got holes in your clothes, then I'd like them to be thrown away. I love being at home in old clothes

so I can do jobs and faff around doing stuff and not care and not worry about it. Yeah, but that's why I think we work well together because we are quite the same. But I did an experiment this year, which I've tried. tried to do. I've missed two days. And I've always thought about it for at least five or six years. And every New Year's day, I think I'm going to do a selfie and I'm going to do that every

day for a year. And I'm going to put all the selfies together as like a little animation. So it makes like a little video clip. What, like a ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch. Why? I don't know. I've just always thought about it. And do you know something? What it was. I took a photo on New Year's Day when I was working. The next day, I took another one. And the next day I took another one.

I thought, hang on a minute. I've done it three days in a row. I've never done this before. Normally, after the second day, I've forgotten. Yeah. So I got three days in and I thought, oh, I think I've missed two days. And I'm going to keep it genuine. I'm going to, I've missed two days.

I missed one. You're going to carry it on. Joni asked me the other day, actually, because I did one of her in the background. And she said, have you forgotten one? And I said, yeah, I've forgotten two. And she even said to me, like what have you done instead?

And I said, well, I've just missed it. But she's done, she's in the background of some, you're in the background of some, I've done, anyway, the reason I'm rambling on about all of this is tonight, I thought, on Wednesday we've got a quiet day where we're both doing something. And I've got time on my computer.

I'm going to take all of the selfies that I've done in the last month and a half, month and a bit, no, month and a half, month and a week, I'm going to put them in a folder. When I scroll through them on my phone, 99.9% of them, I'm wearing a black t-shirt.

You like Simon Cowell, you like, Rickard your face. Isn't that interesting? That is not a conscious choice, but most of the pictures I've got a black t-shirt on. And funnily enough, if I've not got a black t-shirt on, I've got something over the top of a black t-shirt, like a coat. But I've got a black t-shirt on. You need to get rid of all your t-shirts in the drawer that I can't close.

But I think later in the year, different colours are different. Yeah, it does. It's true. I think it'll be interesting. It'll be really interesting. But colour pallets change through each season. Absolutely. Without even noticing it, you'll realise that you start reaching for lighter colours,

more pastels, even patterns come out more. The same applies with winter. When you go into winter, you find animal prints a better kind of black colour. black and white, velvet, different materials. That tiger print fong, that can come out. There's been loads of stuff. Once it warms up, I'll be... You still got that of mine?

Yeah. I mean, it can't go in the rag draw, can it? What am I going to do with that? Give the old... Floss my teeth of it. The old steam engines, a little polish, little miniature bells. It's a bit small for that, really. Local news is in decline across Canada,

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Did you? Esther Bevan said, can you just let Mark know, she spelled your name of a cable, we'll let her off. Well, no, because my name's Mark. I totally understand that. Can you just let Mark know, I loved watching the Nutcracker at Christmas.

It was beautiful, obviously down to the camera work. Love the pod, and I can't wait to see you in Bristol. Isn't that lovely? Oh, that was nice watching that. I enjoyed, that was a highlight of Christmas Day, that was, watching that. Brilliant. Sod the Brussels sprouts, Sod the pigs in blankets.

Sod Natalie getting drunk and trying to serve up a joking. I've got some news for you. Go on. In fact, I've got some news for everybody. Okay. It's been a huge decision, people. Very, very big, actually. Hang on.

She's not giving up drinking. As we are talking about Mark's Christmas show. Christmas show? Oh, the Nutcracker was mentioned, and that was a Christmas thing. I've decided to do a... pantomime this year. Oh, no, you've not.

Oh, yes, I have. You're looking at the wicked queen in snow white. Won't have to do a lot, were they, for the nose, the prosthetics for the witch. They've had it off. No, but in all seriousness, I'm thrilled, but it was a very, very big decision for me. I've only ever done one pantom in my life, and I did not enjoy it. I enjoyed it whilst I was there, but I don't. I like being around for Christmas.

I haven't got to go into it. Everybody knows. They'll be saying we can't believe it. Honestly, anyone who knows me and listens to this pod won't believe I've done that. But my thinking was this. I don't know financially what is happening this year. I think it's very arrogant to go, oh no, no, I'll turn that down.

When you know you can have a job at the end of the year, which is extremely good money, and turn it down. That is the first and foremost reason I'm doing it, because I'm very honest. Second reason, I don't know where we're going to be with Joni next year. I don't know where we're going to be on the belief stakes.

Change it up a little bit. She can come along, Eliza can come with her mates, all the kids can come, Ruby, Alfie, Amelia will love it, and it's just changing things up for a year. and I don't think that's a bad thing. So there we go, folks. Dunstable, come see me. Are you actually getting paid for it?

Got a broomstick and everything. Do you get to go on Kirby's Flying Bullet? What's that? The wires. The flying about. Who knows yet? Might be a surprise. Okay.

But yeah, there you go. I'm doing Panto. Nice and quiet around here for a month, won't it? Lovely. It means the tree will have to go up in about mid-October. I'll discuss that near the time. I'll tell you something. Imagine that kitchen floor by January the 1st.

Oh, don't. Oh, my God. You're going to be mountaineering up it, won't you? You'll be coming here. Hang on a minute. There's about three inch clearance between the floor and the ceiling here because there's so much crud on the floor, we can't move. I'm such a control freak.

I can't wait. I don't want to think about it. You'll be getting home. You'll be like, right. Here we go. Okay. Day off. Walked up to the front door.

Put the key in. The key's not working. Mark? Key's not. Oh. On the phone. Ring, ring, ring. No answer.

Can't open the front. Someone's changed the locks on the front door. Can't get in. Ring, ring, ring. No answer. Any danger of that happening, do you think? Is that the, is that in the kitchen? In the kitchen,

it looks like there's some terminal. might have been in the kitchen. Oh, don't say that. Hang on a minute. I can't see you because there's so much soil in the floor. There's mud everywhere. You'll keep it nice for me, won't you sweetheart? I won't be here. I might go away. Where are you going? Not to know, I might go to Barbados or something.

What, with the children? No. There are children to be looked after. No, we're having a show with you. Your children. Your children need to be looked after. No. They'll be in the can't by me. Not the old, as people say, oh, he's He's babysitting tonight. I want to smash them.

When have I ever said that? Not you. I'm saying that people. Okay. People go. So what's I got to do with me? Oh, they're babysitting. No, they're not babysitting.

They're looking off. That is what people say. By the way, what night this week are we going to the pub to have an ice meal out? Next Tuesday. I've booked it in. I'm working. No, you're not. You're working Monday.

And you're working Wednesday and Thursday. Got it in the diary, baby. You checked it? Yep. What are we doing Monday? You are doing the Royal Opera House. Oh, yes. But Tuesday you're off.

Oh, that's good. So I've booked in our babysitter. Okay, fine. But to do the school run, because I actually thought we've got a lovely voucher. And we could go up to London early and have an early dinner. On Tuesday? Yeah.

Okay. No. I've probably got, yeah, okay, we'll talk about this. We've got probably quite an early start Wednesday. Yeah, that's why I'm saying early. We go up early and have an early dinner. Because I've said we'll be back by 10. Okay, fine, yeah.

Just a possibility. Lovely. But anyway, date night's sorted for next week. Okay, so yeah, anyone who wants to watch Natalie in Pantamime? Hang on, what's going to go on with your live shows then during that? Are you not going to do a Christmas show? Probably not. Oh.

I would imagine not. But hang on. We can do stuff October, November. Have we spoken about this weekend and two shows? No, we haven't. I've got a little message. Hang on a sec. I've got a lovely little message.

Because I bet there's still tickets available. And I would love... Do you know what I would really like? So I'm with you on Sunday. You are? In Newcastle. Right. As is Tony and lovely Scarlet Moffat.

Okay. So, in the past, we've done shout-outs to people before. Yeah. We've looked up the stats of the pod and said, oh, there's someone in wherever it might be. What, listening? I would be over the moon if on Sunday somebody goes to Newcastle. Where is it in Newcastle?

What's the venue then? It's called The Stand. Someone goes to the stand in Newcastle to watch us on stage on Sunday and say, I've turned up here today because I heard you talking about it on Thursday and I thought I'd buy a ticket. I would love that. I know, it would be good, wouldn't it?

How cool would that be? It's like the power of talking about it now. We're sat in our spare bedroom in our house. On Sunday, we're going to be in Newcastle. We're travelling all the way. It's five and a half hours to go up there, right? We rock up, we come and chat, we meet you all, we get to meet some listeners.

It's lovely. Your fans get to come and see you, Natalie. It's brilliant. We should have a really good laugh, actually. It's going to be really good. You can't beat the Geordies. They're so friendly. The most normal people ever.

Just so lovely. And then we get to do the show and we meet people. I would love it if someone afterwards goes, you said on Thursday, book a ticket and I've booked a ticket and here I am. Please, whoever you are, book a ticket. And let us know in the show. Shout it out. Heckel.

Well, you can write, you'll be able to say. And at the end, you better say. Yeah, because we get little bits of paper at the beginning and you can ask me any questions you want when you get there. And I get all the paper, little slips. and then I can answer your questions and it'll be a real laugh. But I've got lovely Scarlet Moffat with me from Gogglebox fame, Queen of the Jungle. And I just thought it would be really lovely.

I've met Scarlett a few times, but she's so down to earth, exactly like me. But I've been in television since I was 10, and she's got famous from watching the television on the telly. And I just think it'll be a great conversation. So please, if you are around and you're not sure what you're doing at the weekend, Buy yourself a ticket. It's a 4pm show. It's not going to be a late night, Sunday afternoon.

And you can get your tickets from www. Lifewithnat.com. And all the links are on there. 07788, 20, 1919. WhatsApp us. Let's know if you've booked a ticket. And on Saturday...

Brighton. You're at Brighton. With the girls. With the girls. With the nieces. Are there tickets available still? There are. All right.

Well, that's another one, surely. I mean, that's a good night out. What time is that on? No, that's early doors. Two o'clock, matinee. Oh. It's right in the lanes. Hang on a minute.

It's the Forge Comedy Club. I mean, if I wasn't working, I'd be there. That is amazing. Yeah, it's the Forge Comedy Club, which is a really famous comedy club in Bride'sale. At 2 o'clock? Two o'clock. So you can come and watch a show.

Yeah. Get like a couple of hours. Get to see you guys. Just have a laugh. Don't have dinner. Amazing. I mean, we should. should do, why can we not go and watch a show like that?

Well, we should, we should go and do that anyway, because we could meet Joe. Yes. See Joe. Yeah. Oh, this weekend's going to be good. I'm looking forward to that, because we're not done a live show since the Christmas one. So that'll be fun.

It will be. It's a, I mean, I've got to admit the Brighton one would be fun. But it's you three, isn't it? Pasti's coming. Pasti Queen. See another friend. Brilliant. I like those two.

They were great on the pod, weren't they? Yes Really, really lovely Elliot and Jake When was I working that night? Uh No, you had a party It was Mark Kingham's 40th

It was and I came back And over here still That's right And they were going But yeah No the weekend Will be brilliant And like I say

If you don't know what you're doing And you are around Brighton area Or Newcastle this weekend Come on Come on Come and buy a ticket And have a little Natta

It'll be fun Joe from Ashford said Hi Nat was just listening To the episode Where one of the listeners Was gutted because she realised she was a year behind and you and Mark said you wouldn't be able to catch up now.

So I thought I'd message in to say that's exactly what I'm doing. In December 25, my friend Hannah asked me to come to your live session in Fokston at the end of February. At the time, I'd heard about your podcast but hadn't listened yet. Had not long finished catching up with parenting hell, so I was looking for a new podcast to get stuck into. I didn't want FOMO, so set myself a target to catch up by the end of February. I am loving it, have pretty much ignored my family for the past couple of months.

I've also managed to read the flat share in that time too. We can't wait to see you in Folkston, Joe from Ashford. That, that's commitment, Joe. And I'm proud of you, honey. Was that quite Trump like? Proud of you, honey. A little bit, yeah. I'm not sure how much we can mention Trump at the moment.

Someone that said to me. I don't know if I'm allowed to say this. Go on, it was that anyway. We got an editor. It's fun. We had someone here the other day working, and they're going to America for a job. And they had a Zoom fully about clearing your phone,

any WhatsApp, anything to do with America, anything to do with Trump, got to delete everything because they're checking people's phones. They're going into search engines or like WhatsApp and just putting in Trump, and if anything comes up, won't let you in. Hey? Yeah, he had an hour Zoom.

Why? I don't know. I doubt we can... There's a lot going on there. I doubt we can say that, but genuinely, this is lovely, Mark. Again, that thing of going backwards and forwards, this is lovely. Hi, Nat and Mark.

Just want to say, first of all, that I love listening to the pod, especially scraping the barrel. Was happy to hear Mark's mention of me when he was in Tesco's in Stortford. Oh. I have seen both of you in there previously, but wasn't brave enough to speak to either of you until then. I always find your shopping conversations hilarious between you both and Nat's nieces.

Hope to see you again soon in Tesco's love from Sheila. Oh, Sheila. Well, I've not been in, do you know what? I've not been in Tesco's in Bishop's Office since. But isn't that lovely? That is lovely. I really like that. And that gave me a smile.

Oh. Well, Sheila, I've not been in since you said hello to me. That's the fact. That's mad, isn't it? I've actually not been in for Tesco's since then. Oh. No, for no reason, I've just not been in there. So, there you go.

How funny. Oh. It's good, isn't it? Yeah, that is really good. I like that. Power of the pod. Amazing. I bet Sheila's not. Is Sheila going to go to Brighton? Bet she's not. Not sure.

No. Sheela could come to Colchester. Yes. Foxton. So, on that exact subject, live shows. We've got Brighton on Saturday. Yeah. Newcastle on Sunday.

Correct. Where next? Feb 25th, Folkestam, Quarter House, February 28th, Colchester Arts Centre, the 7th of March, Manchester, Fairfield Social Club, 22nd of March leads, the wardrobe, and the 29th of March is Bristol at the Gaff, but Bristol is sold out. So if you want to book those tickets, how do you do that? The website I just told you about www.

www.lifewithnet.com. Brilliant. So there you go. Well, I really hope. I really don't like doing that and you've made me do that. Well, I've made you do it because I listen to this podcast. You've not mentioned it once. And when you were doing the Christmas show,

loads of people contacted you and said, when are you going to come here? When are you going to come here? Yeah, I know. So let people know you're going to Manchester. Fair enough. I bet there's Mancunians who have no idea you're going to be there. They do now?

No excuse now. No excuse. The only ones that are out. out of luck are Bristolians. Yeah, because he's gone. But Brighton, Newcastle, Colchester, Folkestone, Foxton, Manchester, Manchester,

Leeds. And Leeds. I'm doing Leeds. You are doing Leeds? I love Leeds. Surely there's people in Leeds that want to come and see you. Do you love Leeds because it's near York? Yeah. And the York Railway Museum is there.

I love Ilkley Moore, which is north of Leeds. Is that a railway? Nope. It's just a beautiful, idyllic. It's very, very close to where the last for Summer One was filmed. Ah, that was pretty. So my best friend went to uni in Leeds and he went to College of Music and we used to go out around the Moors and go around, we used to go to the pub. Ah. All around that area. Happy memories.

It was beautiful. I love Leeds. And we went out in Leeds all the time. Excellent. So I've got an affinity of lead I love it I love York That's an hour away Very good

Yeah it's just I mean it's just like that area It's just beautiful Oh You do a little program on it darling We could do Unfortunately when we do the pod show We just like drive up there in five hours

Do the show and drive back in five hours I don't see a thing do we No that's kids for you You got to get home Yep Well that was lovely I enjoyed that It was a lovely chat tonight

Well, it's nice to speak to you. I've not spoken to you for at least, I don't know, four weeks. Getting boring now, isn't it? The old I've not spoken to you? Well, we're only talking here, don't we? We're only speaking here. Yeah. That's the rules. Yeah. It's in the contract. It's over to do the contract. Get your shoes off.

Not even married. Get my shoes off. No, night. Pardon? Love you. Love you too. Bye.