Life.Church with Craig Groeschel - Happiness Feels So Far Away

Episode Date: July 27, 2025

Pursuing happiness comes naturally, but what do you do when life doesn't measure up? You might wonder, “Why doesn’t God give me what I want? Does He really care about me or my happiness?” Let’s talk about it.NEXT STEPSHave you made the decision to follow Jesus? You might be wondering what’s next for you. We want to help! Check out these resources to ​​discover what saying yes to Jesus means: https://www.life.church/yesSee You At the MoviesExperience your favorite films in a whole new way during At the Movies! Get in on the fun at a Life.Church location or at Life.Church Online. Find service times and learn what to expect at https://life.church/atthemoviesABOUT THIS MESSAGEThis message was originally presented as a part of a series called Almost True. Find out more about the series here: https://www.life.church/media/almost-true/Each week on the podcast, we’re highlighting one of our favorite past messages. Our current series, At the Movies, can only be seen at a Life.Church location or at Life.Church Online. Find a location near you or check out online service times at: https://www.life.church/atthemovies/Find wisdom for navigating screen time as a Christian with this helpful guide: https://go2.lc/screenwisdomWho is Jesus really? Check out this Bible Plan on how to find Him for yourself: https://go2.lc/findjesusABOUT LIFE.CHURCHWherever you are in life, you have a purpose. Life.Church wants to help you find your next step. Our hope is that your journey will include joining us at a Life.Church location throughout the United States or globally online at https://www.live.life.churchFind locations, videos, and more info about us at https://www.life.church or download the Life.Church app at https://www.life.church/appFIND US ON SOCIAL MEDIAFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/life.churchInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/life.churchTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@lifechurchYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@life.churchCONNECT WITH PASTOR CRAIG GROESCHELYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/craiggroeschelFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/craiggroeschelInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/craiggroeschelTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@craiggroeschel#lifechurch #craiggroeschel Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I want to start today by giving you a little pop quiz. The good news is that this does not count on your final grade. So this is just for fun. We're going to play true or false. And just to make sure at all of our churches you're working with me, can everybody shout true? Can everybody shout false? Just want to make sure you know how to say it. So I'm going to say some things.

And then when I pause, you just shout out. Or false. Very good. So, are you ready? Let's go. Let's go to start easy. Hey, God loves you. True. God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life. And because God loves you, you are worthy of happiness. Your life is meant to be enjoyed. You deserve a life that you enjoy. Therefore, it doesn't matter what you do as long as you're happy. And this is why you shouldn't settle for anything.

less than whatever makes you happy. True or false? It started off easy, then it gets a little bit confusing as we go on. And the reason it gets confusing is because everything that I said kind of sounds true, and some of it is true, and a lot of it's almost true, but not all of it is true. It's not completely true. And the part that's not true is causing more people to walk away from God than almost any other lie in culture today.

And this is my term. I'm going to call it the happiness gospel. What is the happiness gospel? Essentially, this is a popular cultural belief, and that is, above all else, God wants me happy. after all i deserve happiness sounds good feels true it's almost true but it is not completely true and the challenge is that whenever we believe that our happiness is god's highest purpose for us it actually changes our relationship with god instead of us living what's true and what is true

the truth is that we exist to worship, to serve, and to glorify God. But if we believe that our happiness is God's highest priority, instead of us serving God, we start to believe that God exists to serve us. And essentially, it reduces God to what I'd call a cosmic Coke machine. That looks like a cosmic Coke machine, right? And we kind of believe this. Like if we come to God and we do the church thing and we pray the prayer and maybe we give some money and we're kind of nice and we're Christians and we push the button, then God's got to give us whatever we want. But if we don't get what we want, all of a sudden God let us down.

We deserve to be happy. It's God's highest priority for us to be happy. Sounds true, but it's not completely true. And the challenge is, if you believe this dangerous and prolific cultural lie, there is a very good chance that one day you'll walk away from God. And this is what some of your friends have done, maybe some of your kids have done, maybe some of your friends have done. And it kind of goes like this.

They'll think one time, well, I tried the God thing. I went to church, you know, I gave an offering, I prayed some prayers, I sang some songs, but I'm still broke. Or I'm still single. or I'm still in a sucky marriage, or I'm still in a dead-end job that I don't like. I did the God thing, and I'm still not happy. And then what happens is you tend to conclude,

if God wants me happy and I'm not, then either God doesn't care, or God isn't good, or God isn't real, and if either one of those, any of those are true, that I'm just going to walk away. from God. And that's what we see tragically so many people doing today. So what I want to do is from a perspective of God's word, I want to remind you that our king is on the throne, that our God is real, that he is good. And our God does care about you. And God delights in your

happiness. He is a loving father that loves to give good gifts to his children. He delights in your happiness like I do in my kids. I'm a dad with six grown kids and seven grandkids. And I love when my children are happy. And I love when my grandchildren are happy. I've never one time. They're like, oh, they're miserable. Oh, yeah. That makes me so happy. I delight in their happiness. But their happiness is not my highest priority. parents. For example, let's say my kids are growing up and they come in all six of them. Dad, donuts make us happy. So every day for breakfast we want donuts. Every single day, donuts make us happy. I love my kids. I'll give them donuts every now and then, but not every

single day. Now, my grandkids come over and they say, pops, donuts make us happy. So, Chocolate, strawberry glaze, whatever you want. Jack them up on sugar, send them home kids. You deal with that. Payday is coming, right? Because they're my grandkids. And I really want them to be happy. But if they come in and say, Pops, we want donuts and beer.

Donuts and beer make us happy. Hey, you can have the donuts, but you can't have beer when you're seven years old, right? I want them to be happy, but their happiness is not my highest. priority. And in a similar way, God delights in your happiness. He is a loving father who gives good gifts to his children, but your happiness isn't God's highest priority for your life. So you might say, okay, Craig, I'm kind of tracking with you. I mean, I thought happiness was the end goal. I getting that why God's there to make me happy and all that stuff. But, okay, I kind of get it. But what role does God play in our happiness? And I want to say this very, very, very

clearly. God wants you to experience happiness, but not at the expense of holiness. Let me say it again. He loves you. He is a good father who gives good gifts, and he delights in your happiness, but not at the expense of holiness. In fact, God's word says in 1st Peter chapter 1, don't slip back into your old ways of living. To do what? We could say to do what makes you happy, to satisfy your own desires. Peter said, you didn't know any better back before you were a follower of Christ.

He didn't know any better back then. But now he says, notice what he doesn't say. He doesn't say you must be happy in everything that you do. He says, but now you must be holy in everything. you do, just as God who shows you is holy. For the scripture, say it with me. All of our churches, you must be holy because I am holy. You must be holy. You didn't know any better back then. Don't slip back into doing whatever your desires call you to do. There's actually a higher calling as a follower of Jesus, not just whatever your flesh wants, but instead what pleases God.

He didn't say be happy in all you do, but be holy in all that you do. Now, what does it mean to be holy? The word in the Greek that's translated as holy, it's word hagios, and it means to be set apart, it means to be different, it means to be wholly dedicated to God's purpose. So if we are disciples of Jesus, we will not look like the world. We won't be friends with the world. We live in the world, but we're different from the world. We're set apart.

We're not better. We're just set apart. We're different. We are wholly dedicated to God's purpose. And the challenge with the happiness gospel, and this is popular in spiritual circles, is it teaches us to believe a couple of things. Whenever we believe the happiness gospel, number one, we believe whatever makes me happy

must be right. If it feels good, if I like it, it must be the way that I am, it must be right. And the second problem is, whatever makes me unhappy must be wrong. And you have to ask yourself, well, what is it that makes us happy? Well, comfort makes me happy.

And convenience makes me happy. And pleasure makes me happy. And what makes us unhappy? Well, discomfort and inconvenience and pain. So if our goal is happiness instead of holiness, then we're going to pursue pleasure and avoid pain at all costs. The problem is what brings us pleasure isn't always good for us. And what's difficult isn't always good.

bad for us. In fact, God often uses the hard things to do a work in us. That's why James said, consider it pure joy, my brothers and sister. When every face trials of many kinds because, you know, the testing of your face, it develops perseverance. God uses that which is difficult to conform us to the image of his son, Jesus. And the problem starts to get worse. If I haven't pushed you yet or offended you yet, hang on. Because we're all going to get. get stepped on, okay? The problem gets worse whenever we prioritize our happiness over living for God in holiness, because whenever we say happiness matters most, happiness matters most. The moment we believe that almost every single time, somewhere along the way, we will start to rationalize

sin. We'll start to justify sin. You may say, well, okay, what does it mean to rationalize sin? I would define it this way. We rationalize sin when our mind makes an excuse for what our spirit knows is wrong. Hey, I know I shouldn't do this. I know God's word says it, but if I do it, it makes me happy, and I feel this way, and I want to do it, and so it must be okay. And we do this in all sorts of areas of our lives. It might be in your dating life. You know, like, you know, you might read the Bible, It says that, you know, sex is for the coveted of marriage between a man and a woman, but I'm in love. I'm so in love. All the love songs on the radio make sense. And marriage is just a piece of paper anyway.

And God created sex, and he gave me these desires. So I know what God's word says, but sex makes me happy. God will understand. Or in marriage. And again, I don't mean to. I don't want anybody to feel shame because of what I'm going to say, but this is, it needs to be said in our culture today. There are biblical reasons for divorce. Let that be clear. That's for a whole other message, but there are biblical reasons. But what happens today so often is one person will say, well, I'm just not happy. I'm not happy. I'm not happy in my marriage. And so because I'm not happy, I'm just leaving my marriage.

well if you got married you said for better for worse for richer for poor and sickness and health forsaking all others i'll be faithful to this one until as long as we both shall live if you made a holy covenant with god and you go through some hard times going through some hard times may not necessarily be a biblical reason to get a divorce don't want to make anybody feel unnecessarily guilty but it needs to be said uh sex my spouse maybe isn't meeting my needs. Or I'm single and I'm not getting no mingle, not getting any action. So we justify what we look at because we're not hurting anybody and it's not that big a deal somebody's business anyway. Or gossip. You get something juicy. We know it's not supposed to gossip.

Gossip is a sin. But we're Christians. So we don't share gossip. We share prayer requests. Let me tell you about her, so you can pray for her. Oh, Jesus, she needs prayer. Oh, Jesus, Jesus. Holy Spirit work on, wait till you hear what he's doing. Holy Spirit work on it, right? Right? Go ahead and laugh because you've never done that in either of I.

Or, if I haven't gotten you yet, Hulu, Netflix, HBO, whatever. graphic sex, constantly taking God's name in vain, crude, disgusting humor. That's funny, admittedly, it's funny. But funny doesn't make wrong right. And we'll watch stuff that will be dishonoring to God all in the name of entertainment. Why, I know I probably shouldn't put that in my mind, but I enjoy it. So, you know, I love Jesus and all. but I want to do whatever makes me happy.

It's rationalizing sin. It's when our mind makes an excuse for what our spirit knows is wrong. And if right now I'm kind of hitting a nerve and you're like going, you're ticking me off, Craig, it could be because the Holy Spirit wants to say something to you

about something that you've been rationalizing. And to quote one of my favorite preachers and authors of all time, Tim Keller said this. He said, the sin that is most destructive in your life right now is the one you're most defensive about. If I'm touching on something or the Holy Spirit showing you something and you're going, no, not me and you don't understand and you're really ticking me off right now,

that may be the point at which God wants to do the deepest work. Because God is a very, very loving God. He's a loving father who delights in giving you good gifts. He delights in your happiness, but not at the expense of God. holiness. And here's where the sermon, if it's kind of hard, it starts to get special about right now. Because at some point, the more you get to know God, the more that you realize how good he is, how faithful he is, how loving he is, how in his sovereignty, he's working in all things and his standards are not meant to harm us, but to protect us. And the more you get to know God,

the more you realize that holiness and happiness are not opposing values. I used to think they were. Like before I was a Christian, I thought, if I serve God fully, he's going to keep me from all the fun. Anybody ever think that? Raise your hand. On lying, you type that. I thought that, you know, if I give my life to God, then he's going to send me to some other countries a missionary. Or he's going to tell me not to do the thing. My pastor says, God's going to tell you, don't drink, don't smoke, don't chew, and don't run with girls who do. He's going to take away all your fun. And I didn't realize that happiness and holiness, they're not competing, And then you look at everything that culture tells us today, every commercial, every advertisement,

everything that comes across your social media feed is going to send the message that happiness is found outside of God. Like to really be happy, you need to get something else that someone, that attention, that thing, that money, the blame, the vacation, the notoriety, the popularity, the power, whatever it is. You've got to get what you want. And if you get what you want, then you'll be happy. But you don't have what you want. That's why you're not happy.

The problem is, if happiness is found in a what, at some point, you got an old what that you wanted, didn't you? You wanted that what, and you got that what, and maybe you were happy for a moment, but the happiness faded. You got the new shoes, and you were happy till your best friend got the newer ones, and then you were sad.

It happens to all of us. For me, I learned the lesson in the fifth grade. grade, there was a girl named Tiffany, and Tiffany thought mopeds were cool. And somehow, I don't know how, I could ask my mom, I don't know how we afforded a moped, but we got a moped. It was sort of a a moped. It was a bicycle with a motor and pedals, and it was close enough to a moped. And Tiffith is, you are now cool, you got a moped. I'm happy. Then Brian Marquart got a motorcycle, and she dumped me. She dumped me, because she said, all you have is a moped, he has a motorcycle. Then Most of you won't get this.

If you're my age, you'll get it. She said, the problem is, you're Richie Cunningham, and I want the Fonz. Oh. I'm still working through that one. I'm still working through that one. I got the what, but the what didn't satisfy it. And you did too, at some point, right? You got the phone, the watch, the outfit, the purse, the car, the TV, the promotion, whatever it was.

And you were happy for a moment, but the happiness didn't last. Why? Because a what always leads to a what else. A what else? The things of this world do not ever satisfy. And then when you start to see, okay, wait a minute, God is a good God, he's a loving God, he's a father who loves to give good gifts to his children

and his standards and his truth and his teaching, they're not constrictive or restricted, they're actually freeing and leads me to his goodness. and His blessings, that happiness and holiness are not competing values. They actually complement each other. And then one day you recognize that true holiness leads to lasting happiness. It's not a temporary thing. It goes deeper than that.

It's a joy. And true joy, true meaning, is not found in a what, but is found in God alone. And there's a very powerful example of this in Scripture in the Old Testament. King David, he had it all. He had every what that people today would want. He had women, he had popularity, he had power, he had wealth. He would have been verified on Instagram, the real kind, not the one you pay for, right? And so the Bible tells it this way.

The Bible says that in springtime, when kings go off to war, he stayed back at the palace and then he saw this beautiful woman bathing. If we'd modernized it, we'd say it this way. He said, hey, in springtime, he read an Instagram post that said, you can't pour out an empty cup. So I need to stay back and fill myself up. And then he watched a YouTube video that said, your happiness is your top priority.

You owe it to yourself to be happy. The purpose of your life is your happiness or do whatever makes you happy. And he thought, I like sex. He thought sex makes me happy. And so he rationalized the sin. When he saw a beautiful woman, he called her over, he used his power to abuse her. He took advantage of her over, and then he covered his track, had her husband murdered,

and then one day he woke up and goes, what have I done? How did I get here? He was far from God, and he remembered that God had called him to be holy. God had called him to be set apart. And in his pursuit of what he thought he wanted, he rationalized sin in his own life. And what did he do? He did the very same thing that some of you will do today. You're going to stop and say, I have done that. I have compromised. I've justified sin. I'm doing this explaining away. I'm doing something I know is wrong on my head and justifying in my heart. And then what he did is he repented.

Re means to turn. Pint is that which is highest. He turned from the lower things of sin to the higher things of God. and he cried out this beautiful prayer of repentance in Psalm 51. He said this. He said, have mercy, oh God. Not according to your impossible standards, but according to your unfailing love. According to your great compassion, blot out my transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. He cries out, God, created me a me.

a pure heart, oh God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Restore to me the joy, not of the things of this world, not of material possessions, not of power and wealth. Restore to me, God, the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me. Why did David cry out to God? He remembered very, very clearly that lasting happiness is found in a who, not in a what. It's found in a who, is found in the presence of a very, very good God. Who is the who? David cried out to the who over and over and over again. In Psalm 16, he said, I say to the Lord, you are my Lord.

Apart from you, I have no good thing. You're everything I want. You're everything that I need. He said, Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup. God, you make my lot secure. You make known to me the path of life. God, you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

David Swartz out with God, you alone, God, you are my portion, God, you are my joy, you are what I need, you are what I seek, you are what I desire, you are living water. You restore the joy of my salvation. Why? Because lasting happiness and true joy is found in a who, not in a what. And so what I want to do is, like, to our church family, I want to plead with you, do not fall victim to the happiness gospel. It's everywhere right now. It's everywhere. Live your best life.

Do what makes you happy. Live your truth. Chase your dreams. Follow your heart. Your happiness is all that matters. Most of us, we've done that. We pursued what we wanted. We've justified our sin. We've stepped away from the standards of God in the name of pursuing our own happiness. And how's it going for people today in culture?

People are pursuing happiness, and there are more mental health problems than any time I've ever known in history, more depression, more anxiety, more loneliness, more self-harm, more hopelessness. Why? Because you can't self-help your way to happiness. Last thing, happiness is not found in a what, but in a who. You alone, God, are my source. You alone are what I need. You cannot self-help your way to happiness. Everybody breathe in. One, two, three. Breathe out. We're all okay? Some of you look really upset. Just, just, just, just, just, hang with me. Let's bring the application. When we get together in our life groups, because we are people in community, if you're not in a life group, we need each other. We need the body of Christ. We need to spur one another on, to encourage one another daily to sharpen each other like iron sharpens iron. Whenever two or three gather together in his name, he is there.

in the midst of them. When you get together with your life group, we're going to talk about this question over your next meal with your family and your loved ones. Talk about this question. Ask yourself this. Where are you pursuing happiness over holiness? In your own life, think about it. Be open. Ask God to reveal something that you may be blind to. If you find yourself really sensitive to something that I'm saying today, like, oh yeah, if you find yourself there where you push back the hardest may be where God wants to do the most. Ask yourself, where are you pursuing happiness over holiness? And then the follow-up question is, what is God calling you to do about it? What is he calling you to do about it? And then listen and let him speak to you and let him move in a very

special way. So let me say, okay, Craig, are you happy? And the answer is, yes, And no, like all the time. Like all the time, I am full of a joy, like a real heavenly joy, and have moments of like ridiculous happiness. And life is always hard, always at the same time. There's never a moment where I don't have some sense of joy and purpose, and there is never a moment where there's not something bringing along great pain. Every moment, I've got an unbelievable joy that I'm married to Amy and the blessings that we have together in ministry and trust 33 years of marriage, and I've got daughters with severe ongoing health issues, all at the same time.

And I am blessed beyond measure to be able to serve as a pastor to you, as a shepherd guiding the sheep. And James, my son-in-law, just lost his dad way too early. and I'm overwhelmed that last weekend there were hundreds of you that turned away from the brokenness of this world and called on the healing power of Jesus and I've got a very, very dear friend who's a prisoner in his own body,

he weighs 110 pounds, doesn't know who he is or where he is and it's just a heartbreaking thing. And the Spirit of God is going to bring some of you to faith today. And we just buried a 35-year-old mom with a seven-year-old son who lost a battle to cancer. And her whole family filled these two rows with shirts on it that said,

God is good. All the time. And all the time, God is good. Because the joy that I have isn't just based on circumstances, but it's something that only comes from heaven. If we live for happiness first and then we're not happy, we don't like where we are, then we conclude God's not good. He doesn't care or he's not real.

But I'll remind you, our king is on the throne. Our God is real. Our God does care and our God is good. But our happiness isn't his highest priority. He tells us to be holy in all that we do. And anytime there is something that doesn't make us happy, and there will be almost every single day, that thing that hurts, that thing that brings pain, draws you closer to him and teaches you to depend on him. And you get to know them in a way that you wouldn't otherwise.

And you recognize God will use, if you're not happy right now, whatever you're going through, to teach you to depend on him. And then as we pursue him, as we delight in him, as we seek him, as we call on him, as we get to know him, as we trust in him, as we lose our life in him, we discover God is not our ticket to happiness. He is our happiness. He is our joy. He is our purpose. He is our life because he is our happiness. He is real.

He does care. And he is always good. So, Father, we call on you today. Reveal to us, God, any area of our life we're putting our happiness over your holiness and do a work in us. Do a work in our church today. As you're praying at all of our different churches and those of you online, I wonder how many of you say, yeah, I want to be open to what God would show me. Any area I'm putting my happy. over holiness and I really want not just the happiness of this world, but I want lasting joy found

in God alone. If that's you today, you want lasting joy found in God alone. Would you lift your hands all it? Lift them and leave them up, if you will, online. Just type in the comment section. I want lasting joy in God alone. I want lasting joy. As your hands are lifted up in a moment of worship, we just, we just declare God, we love you, we praise you, we need you, we thank you. And God, I ask that your Holy Spirit would do what I don't have the power to do. Draw us to your presence, God. Give us a love for you that's greater than anything of this world. God, any area of our lives where we're compromising and rationalizing and justifying sin,

God reveal that to us and like David. We just turn away. We repent and turn back to you and cry out. God, have mercy on us. Blot out our transgressions. Create a clean heart in us, oh, God. Renew the joy of our salvation. For those of you that are followers of Christ,

and you've lost that joy. Find the joy and salvation and the purposes and the goodness of God. Bless God, your children with more than the happiness of this world, but bless them with joy and you and you alone. As you put your hands down today, nobody looking around,

still in an attitude of prayer. Some of you right now, you've tried your best to find it in this world. You're not walking with God, you're not intimate with God, and you realize I have tried to find happiness. if I didn't, the job and money and people and party life, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And what do we have?

A bunch of anxious, depressed, miserable people. Why? Because we cannot find those things in the world. What's our foundational problem? Our foundational problem is that we are all sinful. But by nature, we're sinful. And our sin separates us from a holy God, but God, he is so good and he is so loved. loving. God so loved the world that he sent his only son, Jesus. Jesus, Jesus came. He was without

sin. He came for those who are broken. He came for the sinners. And he died on a cross so our sins could be forgiven so that anyone who calls on the name of the Lord would be saved. Your sins would be forgiven. There are those of you today. You look for a happiness. You look for joy in this world. You haven't found it because it's not in this world. There's a joy that goes beyond this world. It's found in God and God alone. You can't work your way there. You can't be good enough to get there. We simply turn away from our sin and we turn toward him. We run toward him. He gives us the free gift of salvation. It's a gift. It's a gift. It's a gift. It's a gift. And so when he gives it to us, all we can do is give them our whole life. Today, some of you have been

searching. You've been searching for a what? And I came to tell you, you're actually searching for a who. His name is Jesus and he loves you and he's ready for you today. Wherever you're watching from those who say, that's me. It's me. I've searched. I'm broken. I know I'm a, I know I'm sinful. I'm to turn from my sin. When you turn for your sin, when you call on Jesus, he hears your prayers, he forgives your sins. You're about to be brand new. When you become new, we're going to rejoice, we're going to celebrate like crazy. All of our churches are online. Those who say, I need is grace. Today by faith, I'm turning from my old life. I'm turning from my own life. I give my life to Jesus. Take my life. I give it to you. That's your prayer. Lift your hands high right now.

All over the place and say yes. Right here, praise God for you. Right here, praise God for you. Jesus. Right back over here. I surrender to you. Over here, praise God for you. Yes, I surrender. God, take my life. Come on, church. Let's tell God, thank you. Others of you today. I need his grace. Lift up your hands and say, I surrender to him. Online, just type in the comment section. I am surrendering my life to Jesus. And as you do, all of our churches, would you pray, Heavenly Father? Forgive all of my sins. Jesus saved me. Be first in my life. life my Savior and my Lord fill me with your spirit so I can walk by the Spirit so I can choose holiness and live in a way that reflects your kingdom thank you for new life

I give you all of mine and Jesus name I pray because somebody worship big somebody celebrate welcome those born into God's family today come on church let church church Come on, search.