Life.Church with Craig Groeschel - The Grudge, Part 3: Forgiving God?

Episode Date: November 10, 2019

The past doesn’t always stay in the past. Sometimes, you carry it with you. But you don’t have to hold on to the bitter memories and painful moments that steal your joy and weigh you down. You have the choice to let go of The Grudge. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I can feel it. I can feel. Hey, it's great to have you with us today at every single life church who's in the mood today to hear from God's Word. Always an honor to have you gather together to celebrate God's goodness. Today we're going to be in First Samuel in the Old Testament, a message that I've been praying would impact so many hearts together this weekend. We are in a message series called The Grudge.

I believe that we're going to experience significant heal. I've got a question for you. How many of you at all of our life churches love a good miracle story? Anybody enjoy? Whenever God shows up and shows off and does something powerful, maybe you know somebody in your life group

when they come in with a great testimony. They tithed for the very first time on a Sunday. On Monday, they walk into their job and they get a raise and you celebrate with them. The problem is sometimes you've been tithing for years and you're barely paying the bills. And you wonder, where's my miracle? Maybe you've got a friend that's been praying for a miraculous healing,

and God shows up, and their parakeet is saved from imminent death. They've got their miracle, and you were praying for healing for someone that you loved, and they weren't healed, but instead they passed away. Maybe you've got a good girl. girlfriend and she broke up with her not so good boyfriend. By faith, she took a risk and said, no more. And three days later, God brought into her life this amazing, godly, incredible young man that looks like the son or Brad Pitt and is memorized two-thirds of the New Testament. And three weeks later, he proposes to her and they win a free honeymoon. And they're

memorizing 1 Corinthians 13 to declare together at their wedding coming up. And you did the same thing. By faith, you broke up with your not so good boyfriend in 2015. And the only dates you've had since have been with Ben and Jerry. And you're wondering, God, where are you in my life? Where's my miracle? What do you do when you find yourself disappointed in God? What do you do when you feel like maybe God let you down. I don't know what it would be, but maybe it's the baby that you always dreamed of having, but that baby never, ever came. It might have been the engagement that you believed would be coming, and that engagement is still not here to this day. It could have been the miracle that you believed with faith that God would do for you, and yet God still hasn't done what you know

he has the power to do. What do you do when you don't even want to say it out loud? Because you have reverence for God, but you're wondering, God, where are you? Why aren't you showing up for me? Where's the miracle I've been believing for? And then you might find yourself slightly or even more than slightly disappointed with God,

maybe angry at God, or holding a grudge against. God. It's not that you don't want to trust him. You really, really do, but you might be finding it difficult to trust him right now because God could do something, and yet he's not doing that something. For some of you, if you were really honest, and you may not even want to say it out loud, but there may be kind of a low-grade anger with God. What do you do when you realize you're holding a grudge against God? In the first week of our message series, we talked about forgiving the smaller offenses in life,

the things that weigh us down and hold us back. Last week, we talked about forgiving the bigger betrayals when someone has significantly wounded or wronged us. Next week, we're going to talk about forgiving ourselves. You may recognize God has forgiven you, but you're carrying the weight, the guilt, the shame from something that you did in the past, and you can't seem to let it go. Today, though, we're actually going to talk about forgiving God. What do you do when you realize you're holding a grudge against God? Now, to be really technical, and I want to say this because it's important to say,

we don't technically ever forgive God because God never technically sins. God doesn't do any wrong. So to say we forgive God would be slightly unfair. But there are those of you perhaps that you really do need to reconcile with God because you're holding a grudge. You feel like you've been wronged. You feel like God didn't do what he could have done. And you may need to let something go or by faith you may need to learn to trust again.

What do you do when you feel like you've been wronged by God? 1 Samuel chapter 1 I want to look at a really really powerful story in the Old Testament about a woman that had to perhaps reconcile with some disappointment she had in God. First I'll tell you about her husband, then I'll tell you the story. Her husband's name was Elkanah, and Elkanah actually had two wives. One wife is the one we're going to talk about. Her name was Hannah. The other wife was named Panina.

Now, for those of you dudes that are sitting there going, oh, man, that'd be cool. It'd be awesome to have two wives. Chances are very good, you're not married. I just want to say that because if you are married, you're going to recognize that one spouse is enough to deal with in life. You're probably not married. This is not The Bachelor where you can go and make out with two different chicks on one night, come home and everything is okay. What in the world is going on in that show? I do not know. This is not the bastard. This is real life. This guy had two wives, and what you need

to understand is that these sister wives, they had a serious rivalry going on, and I'll show you why. First, let's talk about the husband, Elkanah. Elkanah, the name, in fact, whenever people would name a son or a daughter, they would often give them a name that had a meaning. Like, my name means strong. So my whole life, when people say, Craig, they're actually saying strong. Prophetic, maybe, perhaps, I don't know. Elkanah, I'm just kind of joking. Elkanah, the name actually means in the Hebrew, it means that God has created a son or God will give you a son. So for this guy's whole life, whenever someone say, hey, Elkanah, what they were saying is, hey, you're going to have a son, hey, God's going to give you a son, hey, you're going to have a son,

hey, God is going to give you a son. For his whole life, that's what people would say. to him. So when he married Hannah, he just assumed God would give them a son. But unfortunately, Hannah couldn't bear children. And that's why most scholars believe that he probably took on a second wife, Panina. You can only imagine Hannah's internal dialogue. She couldn't have a child. And so especially in that culture, she would have felt like a tremendous failure. Perhaps she would have experienced some shame, she might have felt useless, and it would have been real easy for her to say, God, where are you? You're the author of life. Why won't you let me bear a child? So each year, this family, Elkanah and his two wives would travel on kind of like an adventure or vacation,

and they would go to this place called Shiloh to offer worship and sacrifices to God. The problem is Panina, the wife that could have children. She would take. every opportunity, especially on this trip, to throw some serious shade on her rivalry, the other wife, Hannah. Here's what scripture says in 1st Samuel, chapter 1, verse 6 and 7. So Panaina would taunt Hannah and make fun of her because the Lord had kept her from having children. verse seven to me is incredibly painful year after year it was the same for some of you those words may haunt your soul year after year things never changed penina would taught hannah as they would enter the tabernacle Each time, Hannah would be reduced to tears and would not even eat.

Some of you have had a Thanksgiving or a Christmas like that. A breakdown. Someone runs off, falls apart, doesn't eat, and is completely moved to tears. I wish you to try to get into this story and experience what's going on. Here we've got Hannah, this very sweet, very godly girl. Then we got the other one, Penina. This is the girl your mama warned you about. Stay away from girls like this.

She's cruel, she's vicious, she's mean as a cat in the shower. You know what I'm saying. Some of you said, I dated her. Yes, we'll pray for girls like that. You can only imagine Hannah's mindset. She had to be asking, why in the world would God bless Panina with kids and not bless me.

God could have given me a child. Just picture her dialogue. I've been faithful. I save myself for marriage. I read my Bible every single day. I come to the early service at church. I serve in the two-year-old room, right? You know, I'm faithful.

I'm a giver. I love God. I haven't done it. There's all these people. They do things wrong. And yet they have children. I've been faithful. God, where are you in my life?

I don't understand. And so she did perhaps the very same thing that some of you do. She prayed and she believed and she waited. And then there was nothing. Year. After heart-wrenching year, she prayed, believed, and waited. There might be someone here that can relate. You prayed and prayed and believed for the salvation of someone that you love,

but year after year goes by, and nothing seems to change. You prayed and prepared and believed for a job with benefits, and yet that job continues to seem out of reach. You ask God for healing, for someone that you love, and you knew he could, and you believed that he would. but yet he didn't. And you wonder, why does he do it for others? But he didn't do it in this case.

Maybe you prayed and asked God, please make my depression go away. I beg you, I know you can. And year after year, you still fight to get through the day. I don't know what it might be for you. It could be the trial that never seems to go away. It could be the marriage that never seems to get any better. It could be financial hardship month after month, year after year, believing you're going to get ahead and you're always feeling like you're behind.

It could be dreaming of hoping for someone to do life with, and yet year after year you still feel all alone. And then one day you wake up and you're wondering, where are you God? I've trusted you. I'm trying to believe in you. Why haven't you done what I know you can do? Do you hear my prayers? Do you even care? God, where are you?

And so you pray, you believe, and you wait. And another year goes by. If you've ever felt like that, That's exactly what Hannah felt like. She was married to Elkanah, who, as best we can tell, was probably a pretty good man. The problem is, he was still a dude. Ladies, you need to understand, you can't cast the dude out of the man. It's just a part of life.

The problem is with dudes is we just say dudish things. Can I say it that way? We just do. It's hardwired in us. We're all bent towards sin, and our sin nature sometimes takes over, and we just ask really stupid questions. If I can chase a rabbit for just a moment, I need to protect some of my brothers from imminent danger in your life. There are landmines in every marriage. There are certain questions that you are forbidden to ask. They seem natural. They seem right. But my God has sent me here today to deliver someone. from trouble and temptation that is to come. Gentlemen, if I can just give you a little advice, what you never, ever do is you never walk in at the end of a day and ever under any circumstances, ever ask. So what did you do today?

Do not do that in the name of the Father's Son and the Holy Spirit, just be set free. Don't ever do that, and all the ladies said. Amen. Don't ever walk up to a woman and say, did you mean to do that to your hair? Don't ever say that. Whatever you do, gentlemen, I'm in your corner.

I got your back. I'm here. I'm with you. My brothers. Gentlemen, whatever you do, don't ever ask the question. Are you PMSing? Did you feel the tone of the room? Even me bringing this up puts me on incredibly thin ice.

That is how much I love you, gentlemen. I'm in your corner. I'm willing to risk all for you. you. Just be careful. Ask questions like, why are you so wonderful? How did I get you? Questions like that. Elkanah was a dude. Somebody say he was a dude. And he asked an incredibly dudeish question. I want to show you one of the most dutish questions you can read anywhere in all of the Bible. Poor Hannah wants to have a child. And Elkanah wonders why she's so upset. And he asked this question. Why are you crying, Hannah? Elkanah would ask. Why aren't you eating?

Why be downhearted just because you have no children? You have me. Isn't that better than 10 sons? Everybody say, he's a dude? That actually made sense to him, ladies. I cannot explain why, but it made sense to him. Now, Hannah's response is not recorded in scripture, but God revealed to me what she said. And what she said was, do you want to rephrase that question? Because you don't want to hear the answer. At least that's what my wife says whenever I ask her a dutish question. I always do to feel her pain. She's doing everything. everything she possibly can to trust in God. And yet the only thing that she wants

that God has the power to give, God seems to withhold from her. Then she's got Panaina running around with her little rugrats, her little drunk squirrels, always criticizing her, belittling her, and her husband, who's a good man, but continues to put his foot in his mouth. What do you do?

when you wake up and you find yourself disappointed because God didn't do what you know he could have done. What I want to show you is exactly what Hannah did. And this is something that on occasion you might even find helpful. Chances are pretty good. You won't hear about this often when you walk into a church and won't hear a lot of pastors tell you to do this. I wouldn't recommend this daily for the next 20 years, but every now and then you may do what she did, she just unloaded on God. She just let it rip, didn't hold anything back, told God exactly what she felt. She took all the pain, all the hurt, all the disappointment, all the anguish, all the agony, and she just hurled it recklessly toward God.

is what scripture says. Once, after a sacrificial meal at Shiloh, Hannah got up and went to pray. Eli, the priest, was sitting there at its customary place beside the entrance of the tabernacle. Hannah was in deep anguish, crying bitterly as she prayed to the Lord. From the depths of her heart, she cries out. I don't know what she said, God, this isn't fair. God, why didn't you? Why aren't you? Why did you give a baby to her? Why didn't you give it to me?

God, I've done everything I could for you. God, I've believed in you. I've been faithful. God, I've loved you. I've trusted you. God, I've always been here for you. I've always declared your faithfulness, your goodness. Why haven't you done this for me, God?

And she pours her heart out to God. If you ever find yourself hurting or feeling disappointed in God, just let God know. Pour out your heart to him. He is big enough to handle your hurt. David did it in the Old Testament. God, why aren't you stopping my enemies?

Why do you let them taunt me? Jeremiah cried out to God. Jesus on the cross cried out to God. My God, my God! Why'd you turn your back on me? I've been faithful in every moment of my love. life. And when I need you most, you pull back, God, why? Have you done this? God loves you and he understands your pain. I believe with all my heart, he welcomes your questions. He's big enough to handle your

doubts. In fact, with everything in me, I believe that our God would rather have you yell at him in disappointment and pain, than to walk away in hurt and defeats. Take your pain to God. If you ever find yourself disappointed, hurt, disillusioned, God is big enough to understand your pain. Take it to them. Hannah unloaded on God and said,

I don't understand. Then in her prayer, she cries out to God. If you just give me a son, I'll give him back to you. He will not be mine. I will dedicate every ounce of his life completely to you. I will give him to you. Then there's an interesting dialogue between her and the priest. I won't go into the detail.

But at the end of the conversation, the priest essentially says to her, may God grant your request. That's all he says. there's no immediate change there's no heaven opens up and god shines a light down on her she walks away still with nothing tangible she still has to deal with pinina her husband's still going to stay stupid things she's still got no baby she's got no real sign and then what does she do she does the very same thing that you might do

when you find yourself disappointed in God. She continues, by faith, even though she may not feel like it, she continues to try her best to hold on to God and to believe that he's still good. She hangs on. She still tries to trust. She sees nothing, but even though she doesn't see anything, she knows that doesn't mean that God's not actually doing something.

And with whatever little bit of faith that she has, she continues to hold on believing that God is still good. She holds on and doesn't let go. 1 Samuel chapter 1 verse 19 the beginning of the verse is so incredibly emotional to me what it says this is what it says the entire family got up early the next morning and went to worship the Lord once more I love the way this phrase they got up the next morning still seeing nothing and what does she do? She went to worship the Lord once more, once more. This has been the story of our family over the last three years. If you are with us during the series, Hope in the Dark, we talked about the prophet Habakkuk, his name. It means to both embrace and to wrestle,

to simultaneously hold on to God even if you don't understand. I told you about my daughter Mandy that at the age of 20, two weeks before her wedding to James, she got sick and never fully recovered. Had to quit work and had a massive change in lifestyle, living in chronic pain, unable to function like normal people would function. And so we prayed, went to every doctor, did everything that you're all going to recommend and all 12 of you that know that specific something that she needs, dear God, thank you for your heart.

I promise you, promise you. We've heard that 50 times and we've tried it 50 times. Promise you. Doctor after doctor, prayed, wait, and believe. Since then, two of my other daughters with some of the same genetic issues have struggled as well. and so I've unloaded on God so many times. If I told you the depths of the cries of my heart, you might even be like, really, Pastor, you did that?

Yes, really, pastor did that. All the way down to kind of like, and this is rude and prideful, but God, do you know what my family's doing for you compared to other families? Some of them aren't doing anything and you seem to be showing up there. And, you know, I mean, I know it sounds back,

but look what we're doing, God. where are you, God? I know you can, God. Why haven't you, God? This isn't fair, God. And then you know what we do? We hang on and we go back and we worship one more time. One more time.

One more time. One more time. And we believe what we know Hannah learned, and that is this, that a waiting season is never a wasted season. A waiting season isn't a wasted season. That just because you don't see something doesn't mean that God's not doing something. That his spirit is still working.

That he is still good. That he hears the cries of your heart. A waiting season. For those of you that are waiting right now, it is not a wasted season. season. In Hannah's case, God hears the cries of her heart, and God gives her the desires of her heart. That may happen in your life. It may not. No matter what the outcome is, the goodness of God is not based on what we see or don't see. The goodness of God is simply based on who he is. In Hannah's case,

this is what happened. They returned home to Rama. When Elkanah slept with Hannah, that was after he apologized for that silly question. When Elkanah slept with Hannah, the Lord remembered her plea, and in due time, she gave birth to a son.

She named him Samuel, for she said, I asked the Lord for him. And she learned very clearly that God's deliver, are not necessarily God's denials. Just because you don't see it in a moment doesn't mean that you're not going to see it in your lifetime.

And so in our family, as we continue to pray for our daughters, we'll unload on God, we'll tell them how we feel, and we will show up and worship once more. In the message series, hope in the dark, our worship pastors who've been writing a ton of great worship music, wrote a song for Mandy's situation in particular and then for our entire church. And the lyrics of the song still ministered to me in a way that is impossible to describe.

And I pray that they will bless someone here today who's in the middle of a waiting season. They came over to our house, arranged for Mandy and James to be there on that particular night, and took us out on the back porch to bless us with the song. And I want you to take a moment to internalize the lyrics because in a moment, even if you're waiting, you're going to have a chance to worship, not just for what you see, but for who God is. And so let the lyrics speak to your soul,

and in a moment let the cries of your heart touch the heart of God's. If you're waiting today, remember he's still good. You can unload on God and continue to hold on to him. We praise our God, not just for what we see. We praise him for who he is. He is good. He is good. At all of our churches, if you're able and willing,

would you mind standing to your feet just to prepare your hearts for worship? Mandy happens to be in the service with me as well as my other daughters. And I asked Mandy many times, would you change what you've been through if you could change it to go back to the way things were? Because Mandy's actually taking her pain and turned it really into a platform. And there are hundreds and hundreds of people I've encountered that have told me just how much her story has impacted them. She created a YouTube page that's got thousands of subscribers. She went and got a degree to help others to educate them with health. And in those who are going through chronic illness,

she has turned her pain into a ministry for others. And I said, Mandy, would you change what you've been through if you'd lose the effectiveness you have now but could go back to the life that you had without pain? And she said, there's no part of me that would ever, ever change it. She's recognizing that even though she's waiting for the answer to her prayer, the waiting is not wasted. that God is still working, that he's still good.

I don't know who it would be at all of our churches today, but you might find yourself disappointed by God, maybe a little mad at him. You feel like you've been hurt by God or disappointed. You're holding a grudge. I would invite you just to unload on him. Tell him from the depths of your heart,

cry out in anguish and pain and tell him how you feel. But then choose to continue. you to trust in him, you might just tell him, I'm not going to hold a grudge against you. What I wanted you to do and you didn't do, I choose to let that go. Though you didn't answer my prayer the way I wanted you to, God, I still choose to trust in you, not because of what I see, God, but because of who you are. I hope you'll understand this, that our God says he will never leave you. He will never forsake you. Our God is still here. Choose by faith to let him back in.

Let go of the hurt. Choose to trust God. Tell him, I'm not holding on to this grudge. I don't know who this is. You may still be waiting, but you can just lift up your hands while you're waiting. Louder than all your fears, church, you can sing. May our hearts ever be reminded.

Our God, he is good. He is good. Lift your hearts, lift your hands, lift your voices, and cry out. to the goodness of our God. Supernatural healing today for God, for those that are hurting, for those who feel disappointed.

At all of our churches, as you reflect in an attitude of prayer, nobody looking around, this is just your time with God. For those of you who are in a waiting season right now, you've prayed, you believed, you're waiting, and you're still not seeing it.

Would you lift up your hands all over the place today? Father, we ask that by the power of your risen son, Jesus, that we would recognize that a waiting season is not a wasted season, that you are still on the throne, that you still are good, that you hear the cries of our heart. And God, for every person who might feel disappointed, let down, disillusioned, we come to you, God, with whatever faith we have and choose to worship one more time. One more time. And God, by faith, help us to continue to worship you. Not for just what we see, for what you do or for what you undo, God. But for who you are. The Supreme King, creator of the universe, our rock, our fortress, our shelter, our hiding place,

our comforter, our Savior. God, for those who need to release a hurt, to reconcile with you today, God, we thank you for healing as we continue to embrace you even when we're wrestling with you. God, even when we're waiting, we'll lift our hands. Even when we don't see the answer we want, we'll lift our hands. Because, God, we trust your character, your nature. You, God, you God, you are good. as you keep praying today at all of our churches nobody looking around there may be some of you you wonder god do you hear my cries do you even care god are you really good i hope you'll understand just how good our god is our god is so loving he cares about you so much that he became like you in the person of

his son jesus for god so love the world that he gave his one and only one and only son Jesus, that whosoever would believe in him would not perish, but would have eternal life. Who is Jesus? He is the sinless son of God, perfect in every way. Jesus became sin for us on the cross, and that is why God pulled away. Jesus died in our place as the perfect sacrifice for the forgiveness of our sins. But on the third day, when the stone was rolled away, The tomb was empty. Jesus was not there. Our God raised him from the dead.

Why? So that anyone, and this includes you, who calls on the name that is above every name, the name of Jesus, whoever calls on the name of Jesus, you would be saved, you would be forgiven. You would understand the goodness, the character, the nature of God,

just how much he loves you. If you're hurting because of your past, if you feel ashamed because of your sin, Jesus forgives your sins and makes you new. You may feel like you're so low today. You've got nowhere else to look. But to look up, you look up to God. You surrender your life.

You call on the name of the one who cares for you, and he will love you right where you are. And all of our churches, those who say, yes, I need his goodness. Yes, I need his forgiveness. Yes, I need his grace. I turn away from my sins. I turn toward Jesus. I give my whole life to him.

That's your prayer today. Jesus, I give you my life. Lift your hands now. All of our churches and say yes. That's my prayer right back up there. Others of you today who say, yes, Jesus, right back over here, I give you my life. Church online, you click right below me. And as we have people at all of our churches calling on the name of Jesus, would you just pray with those around you?

Pray aloud. Pray Heavenly Father, forgive my sins. Jesus make me new. Fill me with your spirit so I can live for you. follow you and show your love and all that I do. Thank you for new life. I give you mine. In Jesus' name I pray.

Could somebody celebrate big, somebody worship loud, welcome those born into God's family. Hey, thanks for joining us here at Life Church. You know, if you'd like to learn more about how you can take your next steps and your relationship with Christ, we'd love for you to visit life.church slash next. There you'll find all kinds of resources and help as you take those next steps in your relationship with Christ. And if you've been enjoying these messages, we'd love for you to subscribe and be a part of our church community. Again, thanks for joining us, and we'll see you next time.