Lifeline - 152. Don't Get In The Way

Episode Date: March 16, 2025

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RUNK I don't see that at all. Because he would, well probably from hiding in the beginning a lot. He'd hide a lot. So there would be like, how many people would die, there are episodes already going, but how many people would die in the beginning if the whole world fought, man for man? Most people would be hiding, right? You have to believe. Right, well I mean there would be a lot of people who would die if the whole world fought, man for man.

Most people would be hiding, right? You have to believe. Right, well I mean there would be a lot of people who the beginning if the whole world fought? Man for man. Most people would be hiding, right? You have to believe. Right. Well, I mean, there will be a lot of people that didn't hide, that would just go out and start trying to take names. But Anthony would be in the hiding category, and Anthony would hide until I would say probably 5.5 billion people died. And then he would be like, we gotta get food or something. And then he would go out and then I think he would survive

and he would be in 35th place at the end of it. That 34th person standing would stab him in the stomach. Oh, I mean. I mean, taking it so seriously, he goes, oh man, I don't want that to happen. 35th is so good. No, you know what? He would get 35th, get stabbed in his stomach,

left for dead, and then still be the last man alive because everyone would die and he would be bleeding in his stomach and then die. So he's the last, literally the last one on Earth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. Taking a breath. That would suck. Anyway, episode 152, it's Sunday, March 16th. Happy birthday, Alexandra Daddario. That's the one from, she's from. So Italian. Daddario, she's from. True Detective and White Lotus. True Detective, there you go, and White Lotus, yeah.

Patreon.com slash Lifeline Luxury. Go over there and you get 50 plus episodes, including two full live shows of our show, Lifeline Luxury. And it is bonkers. You got to go get it. It's actually really good. It's more bang for your buck over there. So there's no nothing.

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Sometimes you got to repeat things. It's called. Then do repeat things. It's called. Then do it later. It's called salesmanship. OK, then do it later. Then do it later. Do it later on in the episode, Mr. Salesman. It's called being how someone sells things.

Yep. Well, I got new dates on tour, too. Go to chrisley.com. I got new dates. I'm coming to your city. Go check it out. New dates. Go check it out.

And I'm going to be in a, well, yeah, I'll be in a bunch of different, Portland, Cranston, Rhode Island, Casper, Wyoming, Denver, New York, Savannah, Georgia, Atlanta, Georgia. You know what's up. ChrisLee.com. So anyway. You know how we do.

Yeah. Also I got a new website. Check it out and stuff. Isn't that nice? Also don't forget, patreon.com slash Matt Delia. You'll get everything Matt Delia related. All old private record episodes, all future private record episodes,

and every single upcoming episode of Matt Delia is confused 2.0. The show is hilarious even in its early form. It's not even fully a show yet. It's not even fully a show yet. It's not even fully launched yet, but we do impromptu live streams. And guess what happens? Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people come

and they watch and they comment and it is great fun. That's the worst voice. And it's just absolutely terrific. Wow, okay. We almost already have 3,000 members. Can you believe it? So bad, the way you're promoting this. Can anyone even believe it?

It's hard to believe. A mattress salesman. A mattress salesman. It would be understandable if you didn't believe it. A mattress salesman. But the truth of the matter is, you should believe it because it's the truth. And the truth shall set you free.

West Minister mattresses. Thank you very much. Covina mattresses. believe it because it's the truth and the truth will set you free. Thank you very much. Covina mattresses. I'm the host. Call 1-900. By the way, did I mention that I'm the host? Shrinking. Shrinking.

And I go over various topics. All right. Such topics as, what if I just listed 50 topics? Yeah, that'd be crazy, man. It'd be awful. It'd be awful. Oh, God. We'd have no more listeners. I just come up with the

Worst. wildest. I said worst. Wettest. What? Craziest. Hottest. Funkiest.

Funniest. You know, topics, it's crazy to think about. You get, okay, I do never ending bits, okay? Yeah. But I do them fast. You do them so slow. Yeah. That's not good.

I do not care about your opinion. Ha ha ha ha ha. I do not care about your opinion. Do it faster. I do not care about your opinion. I don't care about my opinion. I don't, I do not. You're a little brother, dude.

I do not, I am just, I mean, just, you know, in order for telling chronologically I am. Oh yeah. But I do not listen to your advice. You know whose advice I would listen to if they gave it? Tony Robbins. Who else do you think I would listen to? Dad?

Yeah, well obviously dad's advice I would listen to. Who else? Well, you said Tony Robbins before dad. Okay, so guess someone more. listen to dad yeah well obviously dad's advice I would listen to okay well you said Tony Robbins before dad okay so guess someone more well you do do long bits that's what it is your bits are way too long do one give me your cell phone you don't need it Tony Robbins do more come here open your mouth do more put my fingers in your mouth to mark go like this like this, ah, do that. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, unexpectedly on an elevator with Tony Robbins. Just the two of you. The worst meditation. You would just be like, uh.

What is this calm app? What? Imagine. Go in the corner now. The worst calm app meditation. Imagine you're in an elevator, up the elevator goes. It's on floor, floor five, the door's open. In with the coughs in in walks.

Tony Robbins. Oh, he's big. Look how big he is. And there you go. The doors close and you're on your way to the penthouse. Tony Robbins is so big. I get one, you know, what I get one, you know, dude, I had, but when I was in rehab, I was doing, we had to start the day with meditation.

Oh man. And I wanted, I thought of, I should come out with an app myself where I do daily meditations and I do them the way I wanna do them. And not necessarily the way meditations are. And I think I can make trillions of dollars. Never too late.

Sit, yeah, feel your butt on the chair, put your feet on the ground flat, feel the earth. Yeah, stuff like that, you know. That's actually what people who host meditations do. Are you hungry? It doesn't matter, let it go. Your feelings are not you, they're just feelings. Okay.

Do you have a boner? If you're a woman, are you wet? If not, it's all good. So invasive. Breathe in. So invasive. What if Tony Robbins walked in the room right now? Breathe in, what if Tony Robbins walked in the room? What if he was standing right in front of you?

Breathe out on Tony Robbins. Tony Robbins walked in the room? What if he was standing right in front of you? Breathe out on Tony Robbins. Tony Robbins. All right, well. I am Tony, for those who don't know, I am Tony Robbins 2.0. And it was wrong. Okay. So if you wanna do a one-on-one session

with your boy, Matt D'Alia, Now that's a good way to promote. AKA Tony Robbins 2.0. Now that's a good way to promote. Go to MattDalia.com and book a session with me. That's a good way to pay a Tony Robbins 2.0. That's a good way to go to Matt D'Alia comm admit book a session with me That's a good way to promote and I'll Tony Robbins 2.0 your ass to the Flark and moon see it's taking too long knew it shut up your bits are slow Your face is dumb

What you got for what you got four years old Calvin would say it All right, well, what are we gonna do and jump right in or what? I don't know whatever bro Is dumb. What you got? Four. What you got? Four years old. Calvin would say it. Alright, well, what are we gonna do? Are we gonna jump right in or what? I don't know. Whatever, bro. I'm just saying. Yeah, we can put it to a thing. Let's do it. Alright. Challenging me. Hey guys. Ian calling from the Yukon territory. I'm out here fishing with my dog. Oh, nice.

Catching nothing. Wow, dog looks so miserable. And, uh, I was just thinking, my girlfriend's always mad at me because I fish too much. Uh, what do I do about this? It's my passion. Um, yeah, I live in the Yukon. This is what you do, you go fishing. Let me know what you think.

Thanks guys. Well I mean look, your whole thing is... that's pretty cool. Your whole thing is, I mean this is the man's plight. This is just what happens. You know, I'm assuming this is your hobby I guess and you're not your job, but I guess I don't know. This sounds like something in between how I made a job, like a calling. Right, right, right, right. Well, yeah.

But so she doesn't want you to do it because as Chris Rock said, women want to be the only focus of your happiness or whatever he said, I paraphrased it. But that has nothing to do with her. So she's like, what the heck? Invite her. And when she says no, because it's gonna be too cold,

be like, I invited you. And then also, here's another thing too, get better at it. You said you caught nothing, catch so much shit so that she can't be like, you know what I mean? Be like, well yeah, okay, we're gonna eat for days, dude. Yeah, but also, here's the thing I don't like about all this. I don't mean to shit talk your wife,

I don't like doing that. But like, it's the guy's passion. Yeah. He loves it. Why would you want him to do it for one second less than he does it? I told you why, but yeah. Like, it's crazy.

Let him live, B. It's so common when I come across this shit. My girlfriend doesn't want me to do this even though it's my favorite thing. I don't know how to let go of her. My boyfriend doesn't want me to do this, but it's my favorite thing. I don't know how to get over it.

And it's like, why do these people that you're dating want you to stop doing your favorite thing? Well, because yeah, because they're selfish, I think. Yeah. I get that way sometimes. Kristin is often doing projects in the house. She's often, and I'm like, well, I wish she would hang out with me.

But then I'm like, well, that's what she wants to do. She's having so much fun, I guess. Fuck it. That's having so much fun, I guess. You know, fuck it. That's how far it gets. And I do sometimes say like, yo, can we like watch a movie or something? And she'll be like, can we do it while I'm, while I'm lasering, while I'm etching the bathroom walls?

And I'm like, how? You want me to bring an iPad in the fucking bathroom with I'm like, how? You want me to bring an iPad in the bathroom with us? Yeah, how about? What? How about a little bit? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, help etching the bathroom, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

but that's how I feel. How do you feel? Define it quicker. About, about- Define it in like four words. Don't, don't get in the way. Don't get in the way. Don't get in the way. Yeah, see what that can be.

Why that's good is that can be a bumper sticker. Don't get in the way. And frankly, I've been looking for ways to get rich, frankly, lately, because I'm poor. And I'm going to make that bumper sticker, don't get in the way. I'm going to start selling it. A merch is much better, but OK.

Yeah, I just- Be rich. People don't- it's tough to live with someone. Period. It's almost impossible. Yeah, it is almost impossible. And divorce rate would reflect that immediately. You're helping your relationship by fishing.

Yeah, actually. Probably. I just- I'll never get over the whole thing with, honey, you're doing the thing you love too much. Well, cause it's not involving her. I do get that. But, but, but, but no, but the thing that makes him him is that doing, is doing the thing he loves the amount he needs to

do it. I know, but then once you get with something like that, and I'm only playing devil's advocate, I get it, but once you get to that point where you're with the person and you live with them and you want to start a family, you want to be with them because you're you. Yeah, I understand, you're like going ice fishing in the middle of fucking nowhere. But what about I want I like you and want to be around you? I do understand that. And people aren't happy just being alone by themselves. So what is he? How long do you think?

He didn't say, but how long is a guy gone? I'm sure hours. I mean, look at the setup, dude. There wasn't even a house near there. He's just like waiting for a fish to grab some bullshit. You said it's his favorite thing to do in the world though. How could you with a straight face? I could never do that to my partner. Be like, look, I know you love to ex whatever the hell it is.

Women like to schedule shit. You know what I mean? Like they like to be like, oh, well, but from here to here we can do this though. And how come we don't go to lunch? And she's never gonna be happy, dude. But you know, you know what? It's like, is she going to, here's my bottom line.

Is she going to leave you because you fish too much? Is she going to start, you know, cheating and getting a, you know, a guy who ice fishes less in the Yukon to, to help her satisfy, is she going to be, you know, is there going to be someone else raising your kids? Like Like that's that's then it's dire at this point you're just basically in the situation that every married guy is in and There's no way out of it really except for Fishing less That's it bottom line. So either fish less be be unhappy, or do what you're going to do and deal with the consequences. Wait, that last part's too vague. What do you mean?

Sorry. Either fish less and deal with the arguments or do what you're going to do, meaning fish as much as you want to and deal with the arguments. Yeah, you know what I'm saying. I think you've got to fish. You know what I'm saying. I said it backwards. You've got to figure out the minimum amount of fishing that would suit your whatever the fuck.

Relationship. Level of happiness or whatever. Oh, got it. And just try that out for a little bit. I mean, dude. Try out, figure out what the minimum is. I like working out and I got into it really hard and I liked it a lot and I did it every day.

And it was a few months of that, you know, until Kristen is like, why you gotta go work out again? You know, it's just what happens. There's not a relationship that doesn't happen. It's just what happens. And then I'm like, well, I'm getting healthy, I like it. And she's like, I know, but, and then I gotta do, okay,

maybe I'll work out at home or whatever. It's just what being in a relationship is. So you either say, no, I'm super buff, I'm gonna go work out when I want to, as long as I want to and deal with the argument, or I will acquiesce not work out as much and do, and be at home more. And that will be, have to be okay with me.

And resentment will build. And you won't, you know what I mean? I hate it. Okay, well. It sucks. That's fine, but that's how it is. Men and women are so different, it's unbelievable you know what I mean? I hate it. Okay, well. It sucks. That's fine, but that's how it is. Men and women are so different, it's unbelievable. You might as well be dating a chair.

Well, chairs don't talk back, but next one. Hey guys, love you so much. I don't wanna waste your time, so let's get right into the story. Great voice. So my boyfriend has a roommate. They're both in their mid to late 20s and they live in a two bedroom apartment together.

His roommate's mother lives right down the street We're gonna call her mom mom has a boyfriend who's much older than her name John. Let's just say John sucks as a person We all know it But he's really rich and she always says she's just with him for his money and the gifts that she Gets from him because she's older and he's gonna die soon. Anyways Wow now it's not uncommon for mom and John to get into fights and Mom will have to come stay at my boyfriend's apartment for a few nights because she doesn't want to be with John.

They always get back together. He always buys her things and wins her back. This time, however, mom has said she's done. She's breaking up with them and she's moving out of the state. And she asked my boyfriend and his roommate, her son, if she can stay with them for about two weeks until she can get all our stuff out of the house

and get out and move. Of course, they said yes, because we all want her away from John, so we'll do whatever it takes. But then the other night, the mom starts talking to my boyfriend and I, when the roommate was not present, about how she's been going over to see John and they've been getting lunches and dinners and he's been buying her gifts and he's saying he's changed and being all nice all of a sudden and blah, blah, blah. And we never really thought anything of it because she talks like this all the time every

time they get in a fight. But you know when you're in your really late 20s and someone's mom is staying at your apartment for two weeks when you have like one living area, it's small quarters, it kind of gets a little burdensome. Now we all love mom and she's great to us and she takes care of us, but I feel like there is a line that is going to be crossed and that may have already been crossed. When you're claiming that you don't have anywhere to go

because you're so uncomfortable from this, you know, abusive or whatever boyfriend that you have, to be staying at someone else's house for two weeks, while yes, they did say it was okay and they didn't mind, I think that's still really rude to then go tell those people that you have been still going over and seeing John and hanging Yeah, definitely going to his house because you're just coming back to the apartment to sleep

Yes, and if you're comfortable enough to be around him there, why can't you just stay there? Yes, and then when she was telling us that story she ended by saying don't tell Roommate her son. Oh that I've been hanging out with him. Why we were just kind of like, okay But the more I think about it I'm kind of like should we tell him because he might not be okay with the fact that she's staying at his house for two weeks No, but also still seeing John and not telling him that I think if that was my mom I'd be pretty pissed about it Yeah

but I don't want to like start family drama and you did as my boyfriend and We definitely don't want to start like roommate drama because they're best friends like for a long time But there's a big part of me that's thinking they're just gonna get back together again like they always do she's not gonna move out of there and she's basically gonna have lived with you guys for two weeks for no reason and in my opinion that's kind of rude so my question is would you guys tell the roommate like what his mom said or what she's been doing or would you just let it go and let the two weeks run its course, see if she moves or whatever?

We just don't really know what to do. You could give it two weeks, it's two weeks. So it's not that long. So give it a time, be like, okay, it's two weeks. And then after that, move out, get your own place. And if you're going to move out with a guy, move back with a guy, but like, you know, no harm, no foul two weeks, but that's it. If it's more and she's just like sleeping there and keeps doing it, that's so annoying, but what she did was say, don't tell the other person, which is that fucks everything up because she's, first of all, are the roommates brothers? I think that they were, it was a couple, right? It's her boyfriend and his friend. Oh, I thought that. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. were, it was a couple, right? It's her boyfriend and his friend.

His brother. Oh, I thought that, okay. Yeah. Yeah, I thought it was his brother. It's just, yeah, it's shady. And she's doing that because she knows what she's doing is using them for their place. Also, can she not afford the place or or here's what it's like. Okay, I'm gonna come stay with you guys for two weeks

because I'm gonna break up with my dude. And then if you were gonna break up with your dude, you would just move out. What she's doing is, it's her tell already. Like she's already admitting that she's gonna go back to him by just staying with them. Do you understand?

Yeah, fuck, yeah I do. I do. I think we have a rare case. We might have a rare case of a complete agreement. Oh, wow. Yeah, it's rare. I mean, I'm not saying go tell the person but you should tell her, yo you need to tell him. You need to tell him because it's not like I don't want to keep it from him. You know unless your boyfriend is just like I don't

give a fuck. I mean does it really affect her? I guess it probably does if she goes to stay over there sometimes. Yeah. But yeah I don't know. I think that that whole thing is fucked up and it's weird when the parent uses the kid to like- Go ahead. To like as the parent almost. Wait, is that? The parent is using her son as like the son shouldn't parent the mom. And that's what seems like a little bit has happened.

Yeah, that's a really tricky thing. Yeah. That tipping point happens where it's like... I don't know, I mean... ...with Sue and, yeah. I know there's money involved and it's tough to sometimes get out of your situation because of other reasons and monetary reasons, but you know, you can't, I can't imagine saying to my kids, hey, can I come stay with you for a little bit

while I break up with my, you know what I mean? That's so odd. Yeah, I don't know. It's weird when people cross that boundary of like, my child is my friend, my child is my child and then my child is my friend. My child is my child and then my child is my friend. Because then the child kind of has no parent to go to. They'll always have friends to go to.

But where's the parent that they gotta go to? They get to go to if they're lucky enough to still have a fucking parent to go to. Messy situation. Yeah, I don't think it's good. She sounded like Eliza though. Eliza. Eliza Schlesinger.

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Bonus bets expire 168 hours after issuance. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources see DK ng dot co slash b ball They met he Chris. I love you guys so much. Thank you so much for everything What a shot and following you guys since forever quick question so much my girlfriend of Four months she wants me to paint change Forgets like it is nobody's business. She forgets so much so often. It's not even like a like a cute thing anymore.

It's like I'm worried. She's mentioned. She'll be like, oh my God, you know what? And she said that thing at least 10 different times. And she's done that about at least 10 different things. And I don't know what to do anymore We've talked about it and she's been like hey just pretend like it's the first time again. I'll be okay I'll try and then that works sometimes and sometimes it just does it. I'm like, hey, you just talked about this like two weeks ago

It's just really hard and I don't know like This isn't a non-problem. It upsets me, because sometimes it'll be stuff that matters to me. And it's just confusing. I mean, what do you guys think I should do? Or do you have any advice there? Are you, have you experienced it? Have you been through this before? Thank you guys. I don't want to keep you.

Thank you so much. Thanks for saying it's not a non-issue. That made me really realize the annoyance of it and the depth of it, because this could seem like a silly thing, but it's not. I have been in this situation on both ends, okay? I have been in the situation where I tell somebody something too much

and they're like, what the fuck? Okay? Okay. And I've also been in this situation where, well, the situation that I am in a lot of the time with Kristin is, I've told her something, except she's not paying attention to when I'm saying it. So I'm like, shit, I got to make sure she understands that I said that.

So I will now say, hey, just so you know, um, uh, I, do I have your full attention? Cause I need to tell you this. Yes. I say, okay, we got another trash can and it's outside. So you can put the other trash in there or whatever it is, you know, uh, because I have, yeah, I have to make sure that she's locked in. All right. Uh, in your situation, you can't... it's not like you can say to her, hey, you just told me that, so we're good. You know? I guess... does she talk too much? I don't understand. I mean, you talk about somebody with bad memory. I guess, or she's not processing what she's doing.

I have a truly horrendous memory, like a really bad one. Yeah, me too. I don't have the experience that this guy's describing, like on the other side of it, obviously, as often as he is describing it. He said they've been together for four months. Like, really? Do you know how many times this has to happen for it to be like a real, whoa, shit thing already?

Four months? Yeah, that is weird. But I mean, I wish I knew the kind of things. I wish something's wrong with her. Like, because your doctor? Yeah. Four months is crazy for that. I thought it was like years. Yeah, four months.

Four months? Like, what are the, what are the, she's saying something every day, the same thing? Like, that's crazy. What would be the things? I don't know. It just sounds like the regular ass things, doesn't it? Yeah.

I have no fucking clue what that could be. Just outright forgetting? What I wouldn't know, if he was still here, what I would ask him is, once you have said, hey, you know, you've told me this before, is she like, oh my god, right? Fuck I do remember. No, she's not I know she said pretend like it's the first time I told you that's so fucking annoying Oh, that's that that's no, that's great. That's actually a wild. I heard I I know you told me this That's a wild request. You told me just keep doing it. You told me this you told me this you told me this

If she's doing that much and for much you told me this she's doing it. You told me this. You told me this. You told me this. If she's doing that much and for much, you told me this. She's gonna be annoyed with you, good. It's her doing. Yeah. You shouldn't be able, that's the thing, dude. Like Kristen does this thing where she doesn't talk loud enough.

I say what, and then she doesn't talk loud enough again. I didn't hear it. Boom. I didn't hear it. If that didn't exist, what happened? Yes! It didn't exist. So if you told me to do something like, you know, pick up weeds from the garden and I said what and then you said that again and it was the same level of loudness.

Yes, it's not getting done. Yes. And that's not my fault. I've told you a bunch of times, talk louder, especially if I say, what? Yes, you're not doing it off to do the weeds. Yes. Okay.

Sounds like yes might be the wrong word to apply. I'm saying like make it so at least it's fun for you. So you don't have it's like okay. There's that here's there's also like dude here's another one maybe you just break up with this person. Right true you know and then leave her on her deathbed because she's obviously dying because she has a tumor. It's four months it's not that much investment thus far. It is kind of weird to break up with somebody for that reason. Because they forget something. Bro, if they like forget,

just straight up everything you guys talk about. Imagine you say, hey, you broke up with someone. Why'd you break up with her? She's forgetful. You'd be like, oh, you're a lunatic. You'd be utterly understating the situation. Right, right, right. It's just, she's not forgetful. So Kristen never puts her keys where when we come, you know, we have cars.

Sometimes I drive her car. Sometimes, you know, there's a place for the keys. She never puts them in the thing. So if I need to take her car, I go, oh, fuck. And where are the keys? And she goes, oh, and I say, can you just put them here? And she goes, I know I'm bad at it. Every I don't I actually don't think she's ever done it once.

Okay, so I, rather than get frustrated, I go, okay, I'm gonna have fun. And every time I see the keys not there, I'm gonna say, could you put your keys, by the way, could you put your keys here? And I'm gonna do it in a chill way. But it's gonna be fun for me because I'm gonna get to do it in a chill way.

And I'm gonna see how many times I can do it in a chill way until she's like What's going on here? Yeah, because it's otherwise like I had to make it that way. So oh by the way, babe Can you you might put your chicken? I do it twice a day by the way, babe You might put your either I got to sound like a crazy person. Yeah At least it's fun for me The keys thing I got to be honest that is a consistent Recurring Thing that happens in every single relationship I've ever been in with with with the the girl is like that

Yep, never put the keys back where the keys go. That's all I do All I do is put keys back where they go and then yeah me too, but then all I do That's all I do. I doing I'm doing it now then all then all I do is and I'm is put keys back where they go. And then, yeah, me too, but then all I do. That's all I do. I'm doing it now. Then all I do is end up looking for keys when I know they should only be in this one. Well, no, but that's what I'm saying. Her keys. You're like, oh yeah, where the fuck are they?

But if I ever put the keys somewhere else, which I, sure, sometimes I do. I go, uh-oh, let's remember this. I'm putting the keys here because I always put them over there and I'm gonna be annoyed if I go over there and they're not over there. And then I go later on, oh yeah,

remember the keys aren't in that one place, they're on the island instead. And then I go get them. I'm never like, dude, wallet, phone, keys. Maybe wallet sometimes I misplace in my house, but no, dude, wallet, phone, keys. Maybe wallet sometimes I misplace in my house, but no, dude. No, I mean, I misplace shit.

Not my keys, but I misplace shit, for sure. My wallet, for sure. Ask me where anything is in my house right now. Me right now? Anything. Where is your, like workout bag, your gym bag? And I think it's in my car. So this didn't work out so well.

But it's not in my house. So that's why. It's what? It's not in my house. So that's why. It's what? It's not in my house. So that's why. In my car I think probably. Okay, okay, okay. So you're saying.

It actually might be in the other house to be honest. Okay. I have no idea. Which house it's in. You guys are more complicated when you got more houses. Okay. Okay. All right, well next one.

That's, you gotta, I was just. Have her take ginkgo biloba. What? That helps your memory. What? Carrots help your eyes. Ginkgo biloba. What? That helps your memory. What? Carrots help your eyes. Oh, this is the advice you have.

That is not gonna work. For somebody this fucking forgetful, dude. Snort ginkgo biloba. How do you forget something? How many times could you possibly bring something up in four months? But that's what I'm saying, something's weird about this. Something's wrong, dude.

Take it to a neurologist. No, but something might be wrong with this guy, though. I'm saying. Meaning? Four months, how do you realize that? How do you realize that in four months? Four months is nothing, bro. So what do you...

I'm saying like, how do you... The fact that he's been realizing this may be a problem that on his end. Do you understand what I'm saying? He doesn't think it's a problem on his end. I know he doesn't. She doesn't think it's a problem that she forgets shit. Four months is not a long time. Don't say but. You don't have to take some.

To notice something like that. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, okay. If she does it a lot. I agree, I guess. Bro, if she does think? Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, okay. If she does it a lot. I disagree, I guess. Bro, if she does that shit a lot,

that's like plenty of time. Yeah, go get her checked out. Go get her checked out. Save her life. All right, next one. What's up, Matt and Chris? This is Wyatt here calling in from Reading, Pennsylvania. All right.

Been there. Huge fan of the show. Thanks. Chris, come back sometime to writing soon. We had a blast from your year. Cool. I know it's a little bit of a shithole, but we'd be happy. We're then happy to contribute to you getting some more racks if you get back.

Quick question for the both of you guys. So my girlfriend is going to be moving to the States sometime before the end of the year. Um, she's Western European. My girlfriend is gonna be moving to the States sometime before the end of the year She's Western European She's Dutch and currently living in the Netherlands We seem to have a recurring argument every once in a while Regarding keeping firearms in the house. Oh boy So for context, I'm former Air Force UD and I have tons of experience

safety training with handling firearms and all sorts of weapons so it's kind of second nature for me, but Obviously here up here not allowed to have weapons on you at any place anytime anywhere, so I understand her anxiety from it but Yeah, we'd love to hear your guys's advice if you have any on what we can do to compromise I've offered to keep everything at my dad's house down the road for the time being, but we've discussed maybe moving out west to the Rockies or more north in the Appalachians, and if it comes to that, then we do. So if you guys have any sort of advice for that, I'd really appreciate it.

And Chris, welcome to the club, my friend. Um, but just so you know, it is Porsche and not Porsche. No, I don't do that. I love the Turbo S-man. I'd love to hear more about it if you ever can. But I'm not going to do that. Um, thanks a lot, guys. I understand what it is, but I'm not going to do that.

I do it the way I do it. But I will say, uh, oh, why don't you just, oh, why don't you just, yeah, people are weird about guns, you know? People are fucking weird about guns. Why don't you just try and teach her how to use them? Cause she's got, it sounds like she's got too much anxiety around them.

But yeah, that was my first thought, but like, What? I don't know, keep, I mean, look, if there thought, but like, what? I don't know. I mean, look, if there's a gun here, right? I know it's there, even if it's loaded, I'm chill. Okay? No one's touching it. The second someone picks it up,

I will be a little worried, I think, because it's a loaded gun. Why do you have a loaded gun in this podcast studio? And I sure understand if it's just him and her, why do you have a loaded gun in this podcast studio? And I sure understand if it's just him and her, why do you have a loaded gun with us just in the kitchen eating, right? Okay, so that I understand, but if she's just like, there's guns in the house, I'm scared, I'm anxious,

and they're in the, they're not even in the house, first of all, they're in the, but if they put it like in the attic, it doesn't matter. So, so I would advise, you know, be with her, show her the gun is not loaded. Be like, here, hold it. You know what I mean? Like try to like baby steps and teach her how to use one. Cause maybe she's just scared of something.

People are scared of flying. They won't do it. And it's like, that has nothing to do with reality. Flying is safe. What? I don't know. I don't know how I feel about this one. Oh. Okay. Well, that's not the show though. You have to have an opinion.

I know, I think I'm actually stumped. Okay. Well. The rate of guns, Matt? Yeah, like, cause I've gotten into the, let me just get into it, like on like a real note. Like I've gotten into this literal argument before in the past and like

even when I'm engaged in the argument I Don't on my side like putting my side forth. I don't really like I Have such sympathy for the other side Yeah, like I'm like fuck like I don't know what to do. I get it and so I so I end up being like Inevitably on the losing side because I don't brush my argument very hard because I'm like, yeah I fucking get it right but at the end of the day dude the end of them fucking day

When you need a fucking motherfucking gun Yeah, you're not you're not also there are guns it's not like you can't evaporate them yeah, right So yeah, I understand like what people are like. Oh Make guns a league make him illegal to get it It's like, dude, that's not gonna, you can't just make them go away. Or how about this, like, oh, I don't believe in guns. And it's like, well, you don't have to believe in fucking blenders.

They exist, motherfucker. No, I've never seen one in action. You know what I mean? Like, it's not about belief. I think it's just people chomping stuff real fast. This is about like life and actual death. Yeah. Some shit happens in the middle of fucking night.

You know what I mean? There's also extreme, unbelievable safety measures on these motherfuckers. Yeah, like fingerprint stuff. Yeah, dude. And you can go really, really, really far with that shit. You can go so far with that shit that you don't even have time to get to your own motherfucking gun

by the time you need it. Mm. Right. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And so like, I mean, I, you know, I also think though that there's this argument where Dude, you're You're probably not going to need your gun, you know, very unlikely. So so I don't like because the right can get too like Well, I gotta have it on me and all it's like you I don't like, because the right can get too like, well, I got to have it on me. And it's like, you really don't do it. You don't. If you want to, you want to have a gun, fine. You want to have it in your house.

If you want to have it on you, if you're, if you're out in the, the, uh, you know, the wild or, or, or, you know, you're with, you know, you're hunting or you might hunt. Like I get it. That's fine. I don't care if somebody has a gun on them if we're walking around. But like, you know, people go crazy over this shit because they think you're taking away rights, you know? So I just think it's, I don't think you need to, I mean, I would say try to educate her on the process.

I know, but it's so fucking hard. Cause it's not a matter of rights. She's moving over here for him though. So she's willing to do something. She's willing to do something. Yeah, it's a big step, yeah. So obviously. I mean, she moved over here.

It's like, you know, it's like being a vegan. Like dude, okay, you're moving over here. I'm not gonna just make vegan food still. I wanna eat meat. It's kinda like that. I still gotta do me. There are ways and places to put it that are like near impossible to access. Yeah, right.

Fingerprint. But even like literally like where they are. Well, then why would you even have one? I don't even understand what you're saying. Because you're the only person that knows. Uh-uh. But even your spouse like where they are. Well then why would you even have one? I don't even understand what you're saying. Because you're the only person that knows. But even your spouse doesn't know. Where it is?

Yeah, shit like that. Yeah but that, I don't know if that would do anything. She'd still be scared that there's a gun in the house. I guess there's, yeah. I mean it's, unfortunately it really has been so politicized, but really at the end of the day it's just about, it can has been so politicized, but really at the end of the day, it's just about, it can be just about.

Some people are fucking just enthusiasts at the end. You have kitchen knives. You have kitchen knives in your, it's like, you're not gonna slip up and stab somebody in the neck. Yeah, yeah. Guns are unfortunately sometimes necessary things. Here's what you do. The end. You get a flamethrower instead,

and you just have it on you while you're watching TV. You know you could do the fucking. Nunchucks? Nunchucks. Yeah, but that's not, that's no, that's not, you need something very dangerous like a gun. Like you need to, and you should be like, hey, you'd say you don't want a gun, I got a flamethrower, and it's all good, baby.

What about poison darts? Poison darts? Just, oh man, you sit on that wrong and just. No, it's locked, it's in a lock box just as much. Lock box? As much, what is that? What is his name? Al Gore.

We'll take you to the lock box. We'll put the poison darts in the lock box. And you know, This way they won't poison you. Only you. Suck it. Suck in a mini dick. Ceviche.

Only you know. Play in a kazoo. Only you know. And then the motherfucker walks in, passes through the doorway. Suck the dick so quickly. he just before he knows what him Huh? Only problem is there's another guy why?

Why oh if there's another guy? Oh! It goes in your shoulder. No, no, no, no! Alright, so absolute worst part about being sick. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't laugh. You know? The way I agree. Lance Bass.

Hey Lifeline, this is Sam from Texas. And I just want to say that I am the biggest Lifeline fan. I've seen every episode at least twice. And I've want to say that I am the biggest Lifeline fan. I've seen every episode at least twice. And I've been a Patreon subscriber for seven months now. You're the man. You guys keep me sane and keep me laughing all the time. Heck yeah, bro.

I really love the podcast. Love it. And I'm calling about dating advice. So in the past year or two, I've been on dozens of dates with dozens of different women. Brack Bryan! Brack Brian! Rack Brian!

And it's two dates, two and three and a half days every time. We'll be hitting it off pretty well and we'll have plans for a second date, maybe it'll go through, maybe it won't. But I can't seem to get past one or two dates without the girls just ghosting me. And I'm not really sure what I'm doing wrong or if I'm doing anything wrong, the only thing I've been able to gather is that a few of the girls or maybe a friend of theirs that has told me that I seem like the relationship type and sometimes it's in a negative connotation, sometimes it's not.

Well. And I guess a lot of girls at my age of 21 in college, I guess a lot of girls are not ready for a relationship. But I haven't said anything to them about wanting to be in a relationship or anything. It's just my energy that I put off, I guess. I have a sweet heart nature, I don't know. I was being kind of discouraging at this point because I just can't seem to get anywhere Heart nature. I don't know. Yeah

Because I just can't seem to get anywhere with any kind of relationship and it's not not even Not even something casual. It just it doesn't seem to get there. It's just a couple dates Go well, we smile laugh a lot and learn about each other and then yeah a couple weeks later Just nothing. I mean I can make this really simple. So nice of you, greatly appreciated, thank you. I can make this really simple, or I can talk about it for a day and a half for real, but I can make it very simple. Well, let's obviously go with a simple one because it's-

You wanna make the podcast a day and a half long? Let's do it. You're too nice, bro, and they know that they can date you. You have to make it so they're not sure if you, I look, you're 21. So unfortunately, there's going to be some game playing. It sucks. You're going to meet another 21 year old. It's not, you know, you don't get to when I mean it could work, but to be like, Hey,

I want a relationship. That's why I'm here on this date. If you want one, great. Uh, if not, I don a relationship. That's why I'm here on this date. If you want one, great. If not, I don't know if we're going to work out. Because it is not exactly how he puts it, but yeah. Right, I know. But I'm just saying you have to, you have to seem more unattainable. You have to seem like you can't be caught. Let me ask you something.

Because that's what happened. That's that's why somebody will keep going out with you, because like, do they still want to go out with me? Do they still out with you. Because like, do they still want to go out with me? Do they still want to go out with me? Do they still want to go out with me? Before you know it, oh, what's up? But here's the thing. He does want to be in a relationship.

Yeah. And so I got news for you. So do women that he goes out with. I know that. Yeah. And so if he's setting sail, putting the first foot forward, and it's already a fucking dishonest mode. It's not dishonest, though.

It's not dishonest. It's an energy thing. Yo, I mean, you could put that forth in many different ways. You could be like, I got this date with you right now. Tomorrow, don't say this, but know the energy of, I got this date with you right now tomorrow. You know, don't say this, but know that the energy of, I got a date with a different woman tomorrow and I want to, uh, you know, let's see what you got. That's going to make him more interesting than all my focus is on you. And he's not lying.

He wants to, if he wants to be in a relationship, he wants to find the right match, stop assuming that each person you go out with is going to be the right match. Yeah. Stop assuming that each person you go out with is gonna be the right match. They're probably not. Definitely that, dude. I mean, like the fucking, you know what's weird? This, I'm not counting this, but there are two different one-on-one sessions,

guys have reached out to me with this exact, exact issue. And it's like, dude, it's not like you can't go into these things expecting them to just work. They're probably not gonna work. The odds of them working are so fucking low. Also, I'd like to know how many different women he's seen. Is it seven?

I think he said 12. And all three guys, including this guy, have all been good-looking guys, like, objectively. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's not. Women don't care about that. I mean, they care a little bit about it. Oh, yeah, they do.

No, they don't. They don't want to fuck good-looking guys. Yeah, in theory they do, but they don't actually care about that enough. They definitely don't care about that enough Why don't you because I think this would interest a lot of people tell us What your theory is about what women want to fucking? See or meet or run into on a hinge date Because you've already said these these are things you've said.

They don't need to be good looking. They need to, I forget what you, the first thing you said was something like they need to be like, they need to seem like they're not wanting to date, right? Well, they just need to be elusive a little bit. Let me ask you a question though. How can you be elusive when you're on hinge? Well because you could be on hinge for different reasons. You could be on hinge for, being on hinge is kind of just like a social thing. Just for a re re re to the break. Yeah,

yeah, you could be. You got it going on, right? Like you know, you look, I've never been on one of these apps, but if I was on one of these apps, you put, you know, I don't know what the fuck I want. We'll meet and we'll see what happens. To me, that's, you know, so already, already that's, that's, that's, that is, that is more interesting to a woman than, hey, I'm here for a relationship. Don't bother me if don't, don't waste my time. If you know, they know what they're going to get then. And, and if it,

I'm telling you a woman you want to be with a hot, cool woman is going to know that, that you want to be in a relationship with them because that's what you want and they're hot and you're sitting across from them. So you lost all the power and all the, you know, you got to do stuff like when they start talking about their hobbies, you just got to go, nah. All right. Well, that is that would make them so down, dude, putty in your hands. Well, you know what I actually have been taking up is I've been doing tennis a lot more lately.

I did it when I was a kid and I, nah! I'll have a cheeseburger. The waiter's just like. Yeah. Sorry, he was talking about something. I don't know what it was. Drops his pen, just fucking. I mean, you know how interesting you are? If you do that?

Yeah, dude. Almost, almost zero percent. Fine, fine. Truly almost like zero percent because it's like that person should be committed. Fine, but have the energy of it. Why? Who does it benefit? You.

Why? Because then you seem very interesting and you seem like you got some shit going on. But that's not the only thing you want from her. Tell me why that's gonna benefit you long term or even medium term. You have a better chance of getting into a relationship if you're interesting than if you don't.

Yes, got out of that one. You have a more interesting, more, a higher possibility of getting into a relationship with a woman who says, I've been getting more into tennis lately. And you say, nah! Then you do with a woman who says, I've been getting more into tennis lately. And you say, nah. Then you do with a woman who says, I've been getting more into tennis lately.

And you say, oh really? I used to play tennis as a kid. You still play? You love it or what? Who's got- You guys, yeah. Who? Who?

Who? Him? Him? Him? Yeah. Him? Yeah. Who's got a better shot at a long term relationship? He'd probably do it wrong too.

He'd probably be all like, nah. And then, oh my God, I gotta go. The girl would be like, I gotta go. So the answer is my version? Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Boop, boop, boop, boop. No! When she says like- The strangest- You wanna go see a movie? Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do You gotta have a trumpet around bring a trumpet around with you and you when you train French horn That was a French horn. No, but that's even better. Okay, bring a French horn on a date, dude You know used to be a really good expert French horn player him Marco, yep. Yep French horns the most bitch shit. I mean, it's too big for one year and

That's one year longer than You know making elbow farts make it up, but that's all it is it's a fuck the French horn, bro What is the French horn again? What is it? Let me zip my pants. I'll show you it has a lot of piping and it's Wound up and the horn actually goes that way. Oh, we are talking about my dick There it is look oh that thing is sick as fuck Honestly that thing sucks and you put your hand in the bell see what sucks about it. That's cool It's fucking so what hands in the thing. Yeah. Oh, yeah, is it the year?

1300 then it's cool You get that shit from a fucking guy look You get that shit from a fucking guy look Look at this shit Look out that extra sounds grow look out the trick hit that shit is look at the extra piping and shit It doesn't need all that piping its waste of materials I guarantee It's a beautiful sounding instrument yeah, no this is amazing sounding All right, you guys are suckers, huh?

You guys are fucking suckers, dude. We're a man of the arts. Oh, Jesus Christ. This is so stupid, he's playing something from Star Wars, but what are you gonna do? I mean, bro, that's the first thing you learn with the French horn, come on. Here we go. Oh. Piers Morgan does this too?

Wow, what a bitch the flute is, huh? The flute? Little recorder? You got no argument for me. Bro, hey. So shiny, the shiniest French horn ever. Hey dude, over here? Fuck off.

Make sure it's bloody shiny before he picked it up. That's the guy who's the actor in all those fucking movies now. Yeah, Lucas Black. Yes. Wait what no no Not Lucas. I know who you're talking about. Yeah. Yeah the fucking Glenn Powell. No he played a dude fuck Are you guys kidding on yes, we're the Millers. Yes. Yes. That's exactly right. Yes, dude I could do the no ragrats movie, right? Yeah. Yeah, dude that fuck will is it will pull to her will pull to her He was it He was gonna be it before I guess I'll be it soft, you know, he could still be it where ever

You are and I know the horn is going the wrong way. Before we talk about the shit we talk about before the end of the episode, can we just talk real quick about how the fuck, like truly how the fucking fuck did they invent the French horn? Did Titanic become the biggest hit of all time? No, no, no, we're not doing that yet. We are not doing that yet. We are.

When already, what do you mean? We are knee deep in the French horn discussion. Oh, sorry. And we're not just jumping to fucking Titanic because you heard a bit of Celine Dion song. Okay Okay, so the French horn How was it? the worst the worst

Direction, you know, you know, you know, they fucked up right and they were like look we made it And like what might what look? Oh fuck And they're like, what, my what? Look, oh, fuck. Don't go any other way. And they're like, well, play it. And then you bitches like you were like, well, it sounds beautiful. We're all Michael Caine.

They needed me back then. We're all Michael Caine. Put the horn in the front. Look at this shit. What are you doing, a no look pass with the fucking horn? Look at this. The bell on a French horn faces backwards because it originated as a hunting instrument where the hunter would carry

it on their shoulder with the bell pointing towards the back allowing them to see the... yeah they don't need to do it anymore. You're not hunting anymore. You're just being a pussy if you're playing it. That's not the vibe I'm getting. Myself, sorry about that. You know what I do? If I play the French horn I turn around you see my back so you could hear it nicely Okay hunting dude Are we done with the French horn? Okay. Now you want to talk about Titanic? All right, let's go. How the fuck Did it become the biggest hit of all time Because it was a real thing that happened and they added romance into it.

And it was for fucking all ages. Okay, so how much of it do we think was really truly in the end just about Leo? What do you mean? The phenomenon of Leo. Oh, a lot of it was, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, it would be like Timothée Chalamet writing up, did the right thing.

The rightest thing. The rightest thing, yes. Not the fucking Bob Dylan movie that. That eight people fucking saw, and then everyone's uncle was like, it's pretty good. I actually don't, I can't think of a movie I'd like to see less than. Oh my, just fucking, the fucking Bob,

the Bob Dylan thing rubs my ass so wrong. It's way imaginable dude. Yeah. Bob Dylan as folk hero is just the biggest joke you've ever been sold. You're a fucking moron if you think that. And you know who'll be the first one to fucking agree with that?

Bob Dylan fans. Y'all are fucking idiots. He was not a folk hero. Okay. Oh. Dex or Defer? Yeah, I don't, I mean, I don't know. I don't even know what Bob Dylan's song, honestly. Good for you. Consider yourself lucky. I definitely know one, but I don't-

Consider yourself lucky. But I don't know what it- Consider yourself lucky. No, he's got a couple hits. He's got a couple bangers. He's got a couple- He's got a couple bangers. He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple-

He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- He's got a couple- couple bangers. You see the one that I want to fly away. Yeah. Is that one? Oh no, he does the I will walk 500 miles and I will walk five. And then he goes, ah, that that that that that I'm not done. Then that, ah, when I wake up, right. Those are on Bob Dylan. Fuck. When I wake up, right? Those are all him. Bob Dylan. Fuck.

When's that motherfucker gonna die, you know? Oh my God, when Bob Dylan dies, oh shit. Oh, it's gonna be so, social media's gonna be so annoying. Oh. It's like when David Bowie died. When David Bowie died, yeah. I actually thought for the first time in my life, well since the social media era,

wow, like it finally happened. Someone died who deserves to be seen and RIP'd every fucking second of my life. Just like one of the most influential, baddest ass, smartest, greatest musicians, most talented individuals in the history of the modern world. That should be how it is for me when I die.

Just fucking a king, a true king. Thank you. It's gonna be that way when Bob Dylan dies. The only difference is gonna be he's all, he's zero percent all of those things I just said. Thank you very much. You know, all right. I mean, I don't know enough about Bob Dylan.

Yeah, I know. I know you're not a music guy. I just fucking have a real bone to pick with Bob Dylan. OK, well, I know he sings that song that goes, I want sex and candy, yeah. You know what's weird? First of all, it's here. Second of all, I fucking. What, sex and candy here? Yeah. You know what's weird? First of all, it's here. Second of all, I fucking.

What, what, Sexton Kennedy here? Yeah. I think about that song so much more than I should. The one you were saying, Sexton Kennedy. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's so weird. It's such a weird thing to think about a lot.

It's like perpetually stuck in my head or something What's the song that is the life life house song? I'm a fucking band life house life house, dude vaguely. Yeah, we put up with life house is the worst terrible worst band name life house That's not my moment. Oh, yeah Yep. Oh, I remember moment. Oh yeah. Yep. Oh, I remember this.

Yep. Bob Dylan sang this. Pause that shit. Pause that shit. Just so you don't get demonetized. Hey! Hanging by a moment here with you. Even worse because I'm nasal.

But that's what that is, right? Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that song you could listen to and you cannot listen to any other Lifehound song. Do you know what needs to happen to the guy that wrote the song, Hanging By A Moment? I'm sure it was a guy in Lifehound, obviously.

He deserves to get, like Lawrence Taylor in his prime, let's say, like a 20 yard, like a lead. He needs to be able to get down in like a 20 yard head, like a lead. He needs to get, be able to get down in like a defensive position where he's about to start running and he, and it's just like three, two, one, go. And the guy that wrote the song has to stand, just stand there 20 yards away.

And Lawrence Taylor on a three, two, one, the gun goes off. He gets to just run, go, get up to top speed, and just in whatever way he wants, just tackle. Why? The guy that wrote the song. Why? Because it's the worst song in the fucking world. No, come on, it's bad.

It makes sense that it makes sense that you like it. No, it's bad, but I could listen to it, but if you listen to anything else by Lifehouse, you gotta go, dude. What if it's good, what if it listen to it. But if you listen to anything else by Life House, you gotta go, dude. What if it's good? What if it bangs, dude? She bangs, she bangs. Bob Dylan wrote that.

Every fucking rowdy, Ricky Martin, dude. Bob Dylan wrote that. Dude, you know what I'll never forget? I'm gonna call him out. Sorry, dude. Chris Horn, this guy we all went to high school with. Remember that song, Mambo Number Five? Yeah.

He- Remember it. I lived that. Well, listen to this. He heard that song, Mambo Number Five? Yeah. Remember it? I lived that. Well, listen to this. He heard that song. Fucking the entire song played. Did you say who? What? Who?

Chris Horn. OK, yeah. Chris French Horn. Chris French Horn listened to the entire song. A little bit of Monica in my life. That's that one, right? A little bit of Jessica in her hair. It's known one, right? A little bit of Jessica in the hair. It's known as, and it is the worst song of all time.

It's just terrible. Yeah. If YouTube wasn't a big sack of fucking wet flaming pussies, we'd play a little bit of it for you. Well, I can't say wet flaming pussies either, but yeah. Oh, shit, really? No, no, no. Ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha. For real? Fuck, dude. Whatever, go ahead. Fuck YouTube, dude. No, well, now that we definitely can't go. Ha ha ha. Go ahead, go ahead. Go ahead. Fuck you two, dude. Well, now we definitely can't go. Ha ha ha ha. Go ahead.

Go ahead. What were you going to say? The whole song played. And he goes, fuck, man. And I'm like, what? And he's just like, fuck, man. That song, it's just like it's about me, man. You're fucking kidding me, dude.

It was 0%. Just zero percent fucking around. Lou Baga? Is that his name? What was his fucking name? Oh, Lou Baga is your singer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was the singer, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

That song's not about anyone. The song is about a guy who has a lot of women in his life who wanna fuck him, love him. I guess, I don't know. Adore him, treat him well, yeah. Dude, let me break it down right now. The worst lyric of all time is, "'A little bit of Monica in my life.'"

Raina Lou Vega's got plenty of bad lyrics. "'A little bit of Monica, "'a little bit of Monica in my life.'" So sexist, you know? Jesus. "'A little bit of that twat Monica in my life so sexist you know Jesus a little bit of that twat Monica in my life Cooking clean for me a little bit of that bitch Jessica sucking me off Wow Alright, well that's good there you go come see me. I'll be on the road Chrisley.com

Where is he next? Where is he next? Chrisley.com. Where the fuck is he next? You never know. You gotta look it up. He's on tour baby. You gotta go check it out. You gotta fucking shell out them big bucks to see him. It's worth it. It's worth it. Take out your friends. Take out your family Take out the guy you just met at Radio Shack earlier that day Take out your friends from church that you barely know. It's worth it It's always worth it and don't forget to sign up, of course for patreon.com Matt D'Alia, maybe you'll laugh as hard as I laughed at the last episode about the Oscars when I was watching it by myself. Which is both depressing and impressive.

Thanks everybody. Love you.