Lifeline - 29. The Shadow of the Caterpillars

Episode Date: October 23, 2022

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Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. turn off the air so they're still on yeah isn't that crazy dude we were like turning off at least a couple minutes ago yeah and he was like i'm turning it off i know and it was still on you know i'm just like what it was crazy let me get the. I'm just like, what? It was crazy, right? Let me get the hoodie. Yeah, we started already. Oh, and then the timer wasn't set. Oh, shit. Now Chris wasn't ready either. Oh, shit. So what turns out, I'm the only real one. Do you know why I had to get up?

Because it's cold. It's a little colder. Because it's cold and because the air was on for too long. And they're just chatting like we're not doing a show right now. They're chatting like we're not doing a show. It's fucking ridiculous and it's all good So I got my spin move Mentalities hoodie on

There we go And I'll probably get way too hot in one minute And everybody's real curious why I'm not wearing purple You know what I'm saying? And the reason is because it's a weekend On weekends I take the day off I take off from the purple We're recording on a weekend

That's all they need to know. But the show always comes out on a weekend. That's all they need to know. Okay. We're recording it on a weekend, but also got a new case and it's purple. So technically. But it's the weekend, but your phone's doing business. Technically, never stop.

You know what I mean? No, but. Always on the clock, baby. Okay. Well. You see what I'm doing? Yeah. Okay.

And guess what, Denver? Yeah, that's terrible. Okay. Guess what, Denver? I'll be there soon. I'll be there soon. ChrisTalia.com. Go on over, get your tickets. Denver. Guess what, Denver? I'll be there soon. Crystalia.com. Go on over, get your tickets.

Denver, Denver are coming out. Denver are coming to you live. Denver. Did it, Denver. And then also- There's no other words. Yeah, Tempe. The whole tour is going bonkers unbestankable.

And so go to Crystalia.com. We added so many dates. It's fucking ridiculous. Dates on dates. Doing Midland, Texas. Doing New York. Doing New York. Doing Chicago. chrisley.com i added so many dates it's fucking ridiculous dates on dates doing uh midland texas texas doing uh new york you know doing new york doing chicago we added a show in san diego you know so it's like crazy how it's going seattle what the fuck oh he's doing portland it sounds crazy yeah so it's you know springfield wherever that is missouri isn't that crazy that's crazy let me get the orange coaster because I got orange on.

And I got an orange Perrier. I got an orange Perrier too. Thank you. I'll use the blue one. All right. It doesn't matter though. It does. No, I got green and orange.

It's good because the Perrier is green and orange. Yeah, but it would be cool if you mismatched it. I don't like to do that. So I should do this one. Oh, you want that? Yeah, well, because I have the green one. Okay. See how good I am of a brother? Yeah, but is that good?

I don't like that. I like when it's different. It's nicer. No. i used to like give it back then oh sorry i just like monochromatic and now i like my shits you know popping in we go in phases okay life is a series of phases the worst philosopher and who we are in one of those phases is not the same as who we are in another one of those phases and that raises the question who are we who am i who are you uh and these are these are just the the the musings of a uh you know regular old uh regular old guy

class by sleeping um you know what i was thinking about just now when you were doing that? Yes. I spark thoughts often. Is when you're in college, can you just record the professor with your phone? Like, is that allowed? Yeah. I don't know. And then also, you can just not go to class and have another person record it and then just airdrop it to you. Oh, for sure.

I mean, I passed classes in college I didn't even go to because i just had i was able to go online and see what the fuck happened in class oh wait but not because of video because of like uh what do you call it streaming uh no uh streaming no there was like powerpoints you could access that he didn't during the class oh so it was just like screenshots or no it was a powerpoint like i said so it's streaming a powerpoint presentation see a video why are you cutting me off when i'm just telling you the thing that it is? Okay. It's a PowerPoint presentation that he would use to guide each class.

You could click through it because he posted it on the class website. Was it a video? No. Okay. No, it was called The Origins of Christianity. Why did I take that class? Because I'm smart. No, that's not why you took the class.

It kind of is. The class helped you become smart. I was smart enough to choose to take it and then i got even smarter at the end all right well watch lifeline.com to get your spin movementality hoodies yeah look how pimping pimping he is in that um i let's stop saying no i won't do it also wait go to mattalia.com for your uh advice sessions tuesdays and thursdays from 1 30 to 5 p.m pacific time. Booyah, booyah, and booyah. Oh, shit.

You know where I'm going to be? Not three different things. Cheyenne. I've never been to Cheyenne, Wyoming. Have you? No, but it's Wyoming. You seem like a guy who would have been in. Cheyenne.

This is what they do in Cheyenne. Hey. So, bitch. Dude, I watched. Because I was hunting. I watched. watched uh uh you know the show eraser the show or the movie a grandma such a grandma you know the program program erase i love it at the same time you know you can't let me have it but but just because our grandma used to say program a lot of grandmas we used to watch hunter in bed with our grandma and she

would call it we can't miss our program so no but i'll get in bed with her it's creepy uh no but we we would watch golden girls and then hunter would come on right we would just happen to watch hunter but we were watching golden it was golden girls and then empty nest and then oh yeah dude do you remember how uh light that her top blanket was. I don't. It was so crazy light. Like lightweight? Yes. It was actually, there were holes in it.

Like it was like knitted. So poor, you know? No, but yeah. And she wasn't really, well, maybe she was. She wasn't. Yeah. She just probably handmade it

because she was so fucking old, you know? I don't know. But I always thought about that later on. Cool. That's not interesting. Talk about that therapy. So yeah, no,

but what were we talking about um uh which thing hunter and then uh golden girls before programs eraser you've been a racer he says you've been a lace that's the honest worst thing movie that came out probably in 2001 or something with vanessa williams with james khan don't know who directed it embarrassed go ahead okay so no that's okay you know and don't have to be embarrassed because you don't know who directed a racer machines guy and uh so uh so there's a i watched eraser reborn uh it came out recently who's in it who knows you said you saw it so you do i have no idea what you were your eyes were closed yeah i watched it like this so what i watched the show i have no idea who the actors are is it a show or a movie the movie it's a program why do you keep saying show because i because it doesn't

fucking matter you know because it's so trash well you want to know about uh what distracted me just now anthony went and he was dumb yeah we didn't like that one of the fucking yeah one of the guys one of our producers came and fixed one of the cameras he touched the camera he was moving around and maybe it doesn't matter though so it, though. I felt like Christian Bale during the thing where he gets mad at the guy backstage. What the fuck are you doing? Good for you. On a podcast. Made him so Scottish.

Made him so Scottish. Anyway, about Eraser Reborn. Go ahead. Stop interrupting me with about the fucking Eraser Reborn. You wanted to talk about it. I'm helping you. I know you're interrupting me talking about Eraser Reborn. I'm doing shit that people aren't even going to fucking know about so that's why you say anthony made me mad

and then i got to explain what happened because it's happening off camera and i was saying the cameras and it was pissing me off you didn't need to help i did need to help eraser reborn all right so i i i don't think that anybody should make a fucking sequel 20 years later. We've talked about this. Yep. Okay? So they did it. They do it all the time.

But they did it with Eraser. No good. Was it even a hit? I don't know. It probably was. It was, yeah. It was like mid-90s when he was huge. That's true.

No, I think it was 2000. No way, dude. There's no way. There is no way. year did eraser come out i was more right you said mid 90s so um so anyway i think you said thinking of the sixth day no that was actually 2006 i think anyway um so i'm watching a race for reborn and i tell you what, man, it's so bad. Yeah, I believe that.

It's so bad that even I couldn't watch it, and I don't know who was in it. The people in it are the most computer-generated white guy, Asian girl, and black dude. Let's look it up. Look at the people in the movie. dude let's look it up look up look at the people in the movie dude the the white guy the asian girl and the black dude it's like they are all amalgamations of different uh this isn't on by the way this tv is not on so i'm pissed yeah this tv right here is not so i'm pissed too and i'm just gonna sew that yeah dude so much shit's getting messed up is it this okay so what do i do do it hit up oh shit we got it so all right so listen so look at the guys so bring up so first of all they're all there oh the names are made up too

it is like a cg fucking composite of different it's like ai made these people yeah look at them look at the first guy look at the girl sherwood even their names are are yeah it's from sign jackie lay well and then the black guy's the most ai though generated michael number three mckinley belcher the third dude you know what it's like? The Japanese video games that made the baseball thing. That get it wrong? McHunter, you know, Chin Stop. McHunter Chin Stop. Yeah, yeah. And then they just made McKinley Belcher III, dude.

Well, not III the third, but yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it's a trilogy. Eddie Ramos, okay. Mango. No, but dude. Manchico. I mean, I can't believe the people.

Mambo. Mambo number five. Mambo number five. Brestia. So, yeah, I mean, I can't believe the people. Mambo. Mambo number five. Mambo number five. Brestia. So, yeah, dude, but I can't even believe it. The black dude in it. In his headshot, he has his shirt off. No, no, no.

In his headshot, he's taking his shirt off. Yeah, he is. Hey, dude. Hey, like this, like this. We'll change shirts. Let's change shirts for the next look. And he goes like this. Wait, hold on.

Take it. Anyway, dude. Eraser Reborn. It's on HBO Max, and it's so fucking awful. I'll watch that. You know I'll watch that. I know. insurance for the for the next look he goes like this wait hold on take it um anyway dude eraser reborn it's on hbo max and it's so i'll watch that you know i'll watch i know so i stopped watching that and then i started watching jumper did you ever watch that with hayden christiansen no that looked real bad okay but let me tell you something it's not bad until the end and then it's one of the worst movies of all time ain't that a bitch i hate movies like that yeah so uh anyway i love hayden christiansen though do you really yeah i do I love him did you see Shattered Glass no is he good in it

he's really good in that but you know who's the best in that is Peter Sarsgaard is that the one about the author yeah the journalist yeah yeah yeah okay who made up all the lies oh I didn't know about that yeah so so anyway Hayden Christensen was at the laugh factory once and he came up and he told me I did a good job so I love him so there's another example

of Chris only caring about people and liking them if they like him first. I am insecure. Wow. I am insecure. I am insecure. I am insecure. Oh, my God.

The freaks come out at night. Swimming. I am insecure. Swimming, swimming. I am insecure. Insecure robot. I am insecure insecure robot no the insecure robot would be I am so secure because you know he's lying because he's insecure

I got it I got it it's all good so anyway do you want to go get into the show or what we talked about the hard hitting issue we talked about Eraser Reborn. We talked about Shattered Glass a little bit. We touched on Grandma Carmela's fucking small blanket.

And we talked about Empty Nest. And we talked about how she says program. Right. So let's get into it. Instead of the TV show, what's happening? Just sneaky. Try to do everything. Hi, guys.

I love the podcast. Cute. Makes me very happy. I think you'll like my advice. It'll open up a good conversation, I think. Great. I've recently made friends with somebody who... I bring her up, and she kind of brings me down.

Like, she's kind of behind where I am in life. Okay. Like, she parties a lot more than me and isn't as responsible as i am like i just like to be out of trouble a bit more these days but i know that having me around is really helpful for her but i i'm starting to feel a little bit drained by the friendship so how do you think I can still be her friend but have good boundaries in place? Thanks. Frankly, it doesn't sound like you're really getting much out of the friendship yourself.

It sounds like she's getting all the goods and you ain't getting shit. Which makes me want to ask, why are you friends with her but since you're not here anymore i can't ask you that i mean talking like the bad guy in matrix i'm not doing that well it makes me want to ask why are you friends with her but why why i mean like we didn't get any reasons why and it makes me wonder why you are, does this woman have something hanging over your head? Like a threat? Oh, man. Like Terrence did with me in third grade or first grade? Steeper.

Does she have documents pertaining to? Yeah, I don't know. She brings you up and you bring her up and she brings you down. I mean, dude dude you know maybe just like fucking let her reach out do you my question would be do you like hanging out with exactly you like her it doesn't sound like she you know if you're getting if you're getting enjoyment if it sparks joy as mary condon says or whatever the fuck her name is oh marie condo yeah yeah that's different than what you said but yeah as marie strata compton mary condoms mary condoms that'd be a good condom company um

if you're if she's sparking joy then hang you know hang out if she's not then what are you doing hanging out i think what you should do is either honestly not really be friends with this person or say something just be like look i feel like in our relationship it's kind of like i'm giving you much more than you're giving me and like you kind of suck things dry while i'm adding life to it like what do you what do you do you also feel that way like what's going on morning on? We don't want to make her horny and say, suck things dry. Well, why are you making it fucking sexual? What? Yeah, I don't know. It doesn't sound like you're getting anything out of the relationship.

So I think stop being friends with this woman. That's what I think. She sucks you dry. You don't want to say that. And pinches your fucking nipples and tickles your butthole. Wow. You know? So, worst fucking therapist.

So, yeah, I think that you've got to... There's either she's... You have fun hanging out with her or you don't. If you do, talk to her. If you don't... Hit the road, Jack. Hit the road, Jack. Okay.

Hit the road, Jack. Don't you come back no more no more no more you know no okay all right yeah dropper dropper wow that's my advice to you okay next one just got hey matt 100 um i need some advice so on dating and relationships so cool would you tell someone that you were dating non-exclusively that you were seeing other people at the same time and how would you go about being honest about that? I'm seeing somebody that I really like, but it's not exclusive. And somebody else asked me out today, and I kind of want to tell this guy that I'm seeing just to make him jealous.

Okay, well, don't do that. I guess my question is, like, is that okay to do, to, like, tell a guy that you're seeing other people with the intention to make him jealous? You know the answer. Or should I just keep it to myself? Dude, she's got three dudes in the backseat right now. That's what she's doing.

I'm not seeing anyone else. They all got fucking. What do you guys think? So drunk. So high. I mean, at first I was like, yeah, I was thinking like, yeah, just tell him. But then she revealed her reason, which is specifically to make the guy jealous, which is a fucking shitty thing to do that shitty people do. So if you're a shitty person, yeah, do that.

Let him know you're shitty by doing that. Because it's good to be honest. If you're shitty, it's good to let him know. But I was just not being shitty and not trying to make him or anyone jealous dude this video could have been four seconds long and it could have been this um should i make someone feel awful i mean like the context matters yeah yeah it's it's just like you don't if if you look the the game's the game all right if you want to go and date another dude then do that if you want to tell the dude tell the dude but if you're doing it to make him jealous then

that's like why are you backing it up for this new dude you know but what i think you should do is be open and honest with this dude and if you are seeing another guy then you know it's okay to let him know but also like it mixed in the head if you want to make him jealous you want to know what i think actually yeah what i think is dr strange what i think is she wants him to be jealous because she doesn't think he's into her and she wants to be with him so she wants to be exclusive with him so how about this instead of asking saying yes to that other guy and telling your boyfriend about it say no to the other guy and say hey this other guy asked me out but i said no and guess why because i want to be exclusive with you yep and here's the best part if he says no i don't want to be exclusive with you box up then you can fucking go date whoever the fuck you want. Yeah. And it'll be back to where you are right now.

But you don't do something. Make your clam move three feet backwards. You don't do something specifically to hurt someone, period, ever. That's not what people do. Yeah. Just make your clam go from here. Hey, excuse me. You know what I mean? I can't go out with you.

Hold that thought. Hey, I told the guy no because I like you and I want to be excused with you. Do you want to be excused? The guy goes, no. Then we take the clam, we move it back three feet. What is the clam? Come on, man. The vagina?

Yes, if you want to be clinical about it. But what do you mean you move it back three feet? Because you, well, I mean, that's that's a big big rod but you know maybe oh like his dick is three feet all right you're doing it all right you're not clinical okay that's why i didn't understand it though three feet nobody associates a dick with three feet it's so stupid just saying all right yeah so the advice there is on the ground be different on the ground. Be different. It sucks. Be the exact opposite. Be the exact opposite of what you are. It gets scraped on the- Shut the fuck up.

Top of it. Shut the fuck up. Okay. I'm saying it gets scraped on the- We heard you. No, no, no. Because you'd think it was the bottom, but it's not because when I walk, it goes like this.

It drags. Yeah. And the top of the head gets all gravelly and fucked up. Exactly. Okay. Now shut up. Don't be a shitty person. Do the exact opposite of what you asked us if you should do or

not okay bye yeah matt and chris love love the dynamic of how much matt cringes at everything chris does ah falling good timing i need advice i've been with my girlfriend for a little while now and mostly it's good but but literally every big event, her birthday, friend's wedding, my birthday, anniversary, etc. becomes a huge fight about what our relationship is or isn't. We will be having the best time and I'll go all out for her, getting a cabin with her closest

friends, flowers, fancy restaurant, name it. We've only been dating about a year and a few months. You shouldn't use the word only because that's a long time. We've lived together now for about six months. Otherwise, our relationship is generally good, but these fights when we're supposed to be

having our best times and making memories have put a huge doubt in pursuing a lifetime with her. If I can't enjoy life's important moments with arguments, I'm not sure

that I can enjoy life with her. Your advice would be greatly appreciated. Leave her at the cabin. My first piece of advice is to use your and your and separate them because you said you are advice instead of your advice. Maybe that's – now you're acting like his girlfriend. Right, yeah.

But this isn't a special moment. This is just whatever. Well, I mean he's on Lifeline. I have experience in this. that every it was long distance and every time we were about to see each other again we would we would get into like the biggest fight about the smallest non-thing that's so common yeah it is common i think this is sort of like it's not the same thing but it's generally on the same wavelength i don't know what the fuck that is but i don't think it's like i don't know i mean some i think usually what is, is a sign of like incompatibility in general.

I guess so. But it's so easy not to argue when you're just chilling. Yeah, exactly. And when the second something comes up, then it's like, it's like, you guys are like this.

And the second somebody is like, let's go to the park. It's like, right. Oh shit. And then it's harder to get back on. And it fucking, and before you know it, you're like, where's the's the fucking where's the you know yeah and she's like i told i didn't yeah

i think you're fucked i think fights start to arise when expectation starts to creep in and that's why expectations are no good for anybody because people start to expect things and then when that expectation is not met they get angry and then they bring up the partner bring it up with the partner as if it's their fault the partner gets mad for having expectations put on them that are unfair blah blah blah blah and so on and so forth kristen the bottom line is stop stop expecting things tell people what you want so you don't have to expect they'll just be able to give it to you. You know what I mean? I understand, yeah.

So tell her maybe instead of having an expectation about your birthday or your friend's wedding, tell me how you think it should go beforehand and then we can just do it that way. Yeah, it's still tough. I mean, look, here's the thing. Yeah, it's not that easy. If you're arguing and it's tough a year and six months in, and if it's been happening for a bit, and it's happening every time you're doing some shit, it's tough. If you're five, six years in, something like that, it's a deeper.

Then it's a little different because you've been together for longer. But like if it's all, you're in your honeymoon phase. Like this is something that shouldn't be happening so so much now at this point. So it is a red flag. But also I don't know man. Are you doing stuff like getting a cabin going to a fancy restaurant getting flowers together and doing all this shit because you are like running from something you know what i mean in which case that could be something within you that you got to look at i don't know the whole thing kind of sniffs of a red flag to me and i mean how huge are these

fights too are they like big blowout fights because couples fight in fact when couples don't fight at all that's a sign that something's really wrong or or it's perfect let's not forget that i still think every couple should have at least one fight a year just to keep it right you're right you know so we're gonna fight about uh yeah oh honey we haven't had a fight in 11 months we should get to it yeah you know it's last may yeah exactly um i just think like go fuck yourself you're not gonna have you're not 11 months, we should get to it. Yeah. You know what, it's last May. Yeah, exactly. I just think like, go fuck yourself. You're not going to have,

you're not going to find someone that you've never fight with if it's a good relationship. So if it's really all the fucking time, every single time there's some big event, something exciting about looking forward to,

something that's supposed to be fun and she or you always turn it into shit in one way or another, yeah, I'd say that's something worth looking at fight once a year at least once a year but right but he's already fought many many many times in a year and a half so you bought yourself some years of not fighting

so maybe be single and don't so stupid so stupid i'm just saying um up sweetie but yeah i mean we haven't argued since last j, and it is October. Your dad's annoying. I agree that if you can't enjoy life's moments without arguments, then break up with her. Right. Yes.

But if you love her and really want to make the relationship work, figure out a way to get fucking through it. Maybe go to couples therapy also. Yeah, I thought about that. Maybe you are. All right. Better help.

Better help. Betterhelp.com. Laying down. Just woke up right yeah better help better help.com laying down just woke up need your help with something so i started talking to this girl a couple weeks ago everything's going great she's super hot um has a good job fun to be around not his hand really nice um the only downfall is she has a dog that she treats like a human um literally so she takes showers with the dog she talks to it like it's a person um she has it like sit down at the table with her and oh what food well drinks water out of cups it goes everywhere it dictates her every it's a pilot um and yeah i've never seen anything like it and i've had pets my

entire life so it's a little weird um is it maybe because she just has like good motherly instincts and she well projecting that on this dog so deeper but i don't know let me know what you guys think should i just do a spin move should i try to talk to don't know. I mean, people are really sensitive about their pets. So when you do bring it up, don't be like, what the fuck is up with you and the dog? I know what to do. Do the opposite of that. Bring it up, but bring it up real careful

and do it as if you're just curious. And don't say, hey, I'm just curious, but embody just curiosity. That's the only way you'll be able to get answers. And then be careful along the way baby step baby step baby step and maybe you'll get some kind of color on why the fuck she acts like that but showering with a dog and having a dog sit with you at the dinner table is very very strange get a donkey and do the same thing she does and one-up her just a donkey in the passenger

seat just while he's driving to see her get a shetland putting wearing a fucking like a um what do you call it uh patagonia like a like a person thing oh right like it's a human shorts on it and and like jordans and then like having it get out of the car just like just fucking the car up and shit and then like having it sit in the passenger seat and you're in the back and she's driving and fucking up her car and shitting all over her passenger seat and and and also like fucking the dog up a little bit like with it and then it'd be like i'm sorry they're just in a fight like you have to like they have to let them figure it out and she's like but on the second she says but it's a donkey and then say so we agree then

right okay well don't do that yeah because the dog is a dog and a donkey's a donkey but but to do that you'd have to have a donkey yeah get a donkey and that sucks to have a donkey thanksgiving just sitting there giving it a knife and a fucking right just with the turkey just killing your uncle and shit you can't have a donkey and then just go oh so we agree take a shotgun boom with the donkey in the boom with the dog oh my god you make a great point though no no no donkeys you can get a donkey for a thousand five hundred dollars that's too much effort oh that's a cute donkey you can get a donkey for a thousand five hundred dollars i think it's great a great idea uh okay so i think cheaper than purebred dogs a lot of people are crazy about their pets that is a bit above and beyond but i

think all you need are answers her answers might make it sound and seem a little bit better it also asking about it might at least open the door for you to be like well maybe like maybe not like at the dinner table like some kind of compromise but if she fucking drops if no it's about her and her dog only there's no donkey in this situation but if she gets really really defensive about it that is a huge red flag that is not a situation worth being in if she's open to it and like listening and kind of takes your concerns into account yeah like if you have? If you have this conversation with her and she says, well, let me see how my dog feels,

then you got to go. Yeah, right. That's a bad sign. Let me ask my dog about it. All right. So yeah, that's a weird thing that fucking people do. Yeah, it is weird.

Usually they're old people and really lonely though. It's not like that. Well, more chicks. It's mostly women or gays that do that. But yeah, no straight dude does that. So I bet they do.

Yeah, I know, but I'm generalizing so anyway mostly what's up chris uh hopefully got an easy one here 85 percent dude mostly wow dude a tree that guy he's fucking in uh what's the harry potter for sure all right next one he's he's fucking in uh what's the harry potter for sure all right next one yo what's up chris what's up m diesel what's up hopefully got an easy one here for you uh so i'm not much of a drinker um but i do like to go out and socialize when opportunity presents itself uh with co-workers and friends and whatnot uh however i have a hard time figuring out what i want to order uh because i don't have a taste for for it i don't drink a lot um so if you guys throw me some suggestions

i know matt probably you're uh better at giving some suggestions uh but also chris um like if i don't want to drink how do you how do you go about that situation how do you approach that and like um without getting the attention on yourself and um kind of slowing down the momentum of the the social uh gathering uh sweet um super excited for the confused podcast coming out can't wait to see that uh and thanks for the advice dude i always would it's so enough because i don't drink and like it would be so annoying when i was sitting there nothing and people like why aren't you drinking so i would just get a sometimes get a club soda but then i would i would often tell

them can you put it in a fucking glass like that would i'd get like club soda because it's so annoying when people like you're not drinking and you got to explain it you're doing this like nine times a night so i get one of those little mini straws that they have and a fucking lime with the club soda, so nobody would ask me shit. Yeah, that's good, actually. I don't drink now. I used to drink like a fucking fish, but I don't anymore. And I never even thought about that.

I just say, what I actually say is, no, it's okay, I don't drink. And then they look at you a certain way, and then I immediately say, no, I'm not like sober. I just don't drink because they always assume like, oh, like are you an alcoholic? Yeah. And that's obviously not the case with you. It wasn't the case with me either.

I just, I don't know. I lost my taste for it somehow. But also if you do want to get a drink that you can nurse and not get fucked up on, I mean, definitely beer is the way to go. Everything else you can't really manage or you won't know how long

an iced tea. Beer or Long Island iced tea, really? Yeah, no Long Island, no Long Island iced teas for you. Those will fuck you up

immediately. Long Island iced tea? Beer, beer or, yeah, do the thing, that's a good idea. I never really thought

about that. yeah, no, that's so much better. People are fucking, it's so annoying when people ask you that shit. How come,

so how come, oh, that's, and then you tell them you don't drink, they drink they're like you know what that's really cool i really respect that you're like what that's not why i'm doing it asshole yeah um thanks someone the uh get a coke make it look like rum and coke get a soda make it look like vodka and soda uh get it just honestly go like this do you guys have root beer floats and when they say fuck this and leave i mean that would as he said ruin the social gathering though it'd be funny well i don't know man i don't know he'd be alone at home after that if that happened he's drinking a rope root beer float not if they didn't have it but if they could go to like some a diner afterwards yeah that's more fun anyway man i mean all right though he wants to hang with his fucking friends and

they're all hanging at the place maybe he does maybe he doesn't dude he said he does how about suggest other things like you can't change the whole fucking thing of advice okay that's small-minded you can dude one person may not be able to change the world but it can spark the idea that does i mean wow tupac said that okay okay something like that okay it doesn't matter though uh okay my advice was good. Yours was too, until you did it all fucked up. Uh, all right,

next one. I still like my donkey one. Hey Chris. Hey, pastor M diesel. Uh, love the podcast by the way. What's going on?

So I have this, I have a bad habit of biting my fingernails. Um, I have for like, since, since I was a kid, I've been doing this and it's, it's just a gross habit.

The most regular shirt I've ever seen. Um, I'm trying to stop whenever you, like, since I was a kid, I've been doing this. And it's just a gross habit. The most regular shirt I've ever seen. I'm trying to stop. Whenever I'm shaking somebody's hand, it's just I'm self-conscious. And I'm always, like, hiding my hands because they're just gross. I need to have, you know? So, yeah, just any advice on smaller habits like this. Because I'm, like, I'm not, like, an alcoholic. But it is affecting my life.

Like, it is an annoying problem. So, just any advice on maybe how to cope with it stop it completely wear gloves thank you guys you wear gloves dip your fingers in like fucking your anus awful vinegar and then stick them in the ground before you leave the house go to no go to the zoo. Say, where are the rhinos? And then go find where the rhinos or the hippos are and then stick your hands in their anus. You might get pink eye, but you will not eat your fucking nails.

And also- If he's not touching his face, he won't. Right. Well, yeah, but he'd be just like this, walking around. And people would be like, ew, why does that smell like rhino shit? Yeah.

I think you should wear gloves for real real get gloves get those fucking um what do you call them those gloves where the the rubber gloves that like uh dentists yeah yeah and people want because then it's a two kind of twofold it's like you'll your fingernails will get better you'll get better with your habit and then also people will think that you're very important yeah people think you like make a lot of money yeah yeah oh what's going on there what do you got to be like oh it just came from work and but they you don't have to maybe work a crate and barrel but it doesn't matter they don't need to know they'd be like oh he's a dentist why don't you take those off and be like silly me i think actually it might be cool if you put like something on the insides of your fingertips

that not everybody could necessarily see but you could feel it and so like when you're about to bite your fingernails you just like maybe remind yourself to do this. It doesn't work. And it always looks like you want to make money. Just like this. That doesn't work. How do you know? How do you know?

Because I've tried. Oh, you've done that? Yeah. I know you haven't. Yeah. No, I have. No one's ever done that. No, no, no.

I know. But I pick my cuticles and you go to, I was in therapy actually a long time ago, first round. And she said, just put your finger on it and hold it. And you might get it better. And it didn't work. So there's a thing on Shark Tank where the guy was like, hi, sharks. I have a thing where if you bite your nails, you get like shocked a little bit. And they were like, are you fucking kidding? Dude, it's a Shark a shark tank episode and the guy's like you can't sell this right yeah

he's like well it's a low-grade shock like for dogs and then they were like and then they're like well who shocks you and then they were like you do so he's like you go you go oh hi what yeah that's the worst fucking product it actually wasn't if you've ever seen that show there are tremendously bad products so worse than that that? That seems like as bad as an idea could be. It's pretty bad, yeah. Wear gloves. That's my fucking thing. Wear gloves, for real. Some kind of reminder that only you can be reminded by, you know?

A song, a song. Alright. No, yeah, wear gloves. Okay, cool. Or, or, or wear one of those fucking, what's the Silence of the Lambs masks? Ah, yeah. Candy shit. Or any mask, yeah.

COVID mask. Or like the Black Death masks with the big nose. Oh, you can get under it. But they can be like this. Right. And eat it. You can still do it

if you're that dedicated, yeah. That looks like you're sucking your thumb under that big dick nose mask. But at least it would be a reminder as you're doing this, you'd be like, oh, that's right, that's why I'm wearing this mask.

Yeah, yeah. Okay. All right, next. too it'd be a reminder as you're doing this you'd be like oh wait that's right that's where i'm on this mask yeah yeah okay all right next it makes me smile and uh it's kind of serious at the same time uh so i'm bonnie i'm from hungary and i have this thing about not picking up the phone i know it was a topic before but i'm on the other side i'm the one not picking up the phone. I know it was a topic before, but I'm on the other side. I'm the one not picking up the phone because it gives me anxiety. And I don't know why. I don't know what's going on since the pandemic is accelerated.

So I don't know what to do because I'm losing friends over this. Oh, wow. I try to talk to them and they don't really understand me. I mean, I don't even know what's going on, but they're my friends. They're supposed to back me up, right?

So it's just like texting is all right because I can write back whenever I feel it's okay to write back. But when I'm writing back, they try to call me immediately. I'm like, fuck me. That's the problem, guys. So I'm losing frenzy over this, and I don't know what to do guys if you have any advice just just uh i don't know maybe fake john lennon quotes or variations of spin moves or mats any serious thing and just you know i'll just cheer me up because i'm in a really bad headspace right now and i don't know what to do thanks guys what a bummer well you can't uh how bad could it be yeah yeah that's

kind of weird that your friends are giving you that much shit over it. Yeah, dude. I mean, what the fuck? Spin moves don't work here because you're not even with them. Right, right, right. But why don't you try

starting with the voice memo thing? Ooh. You just go, hey, what's up, guys? Ha-ha. Baby steps. Boop. So insecure.

No, I think that... Why are your friends pushing it that hard? That's my question, yeah. Because. It's like they're trying to upset you or something. That's not cool. Like, got him. I'm going to get him.

But I can't imagine. I can't imagine someone just being like, he doesn't pick up the phone enough. Yeah, he texts me back, but he doesn't pick up the phone enough, so I don't want to be his friend. Or like it's a fact. I don't understand. That's so weird if you're friends. I'm like that, and my friends are, no. Like, I don't pick up the phone enough so i don't want to be his friend or like it's a fact i don't understand that's so weird for your friends i'm like that and my friends are no that like i don't pick up the phone and they're like oh that's how mad is that's how your friends are supposed to be

my friends call me i cancel it and then text them and say no text it well that's fucking rude as hell i don't do that i just don't pick up the phone or calling one back i text them i suffer from the realness but what you want out of a friend is the friend to be like uh well that's just who he is it's annoying but fucking haha it's kind of funny because it's not a big deal it's not a big deal it's not at all it's not so if this is a big deal and if your friends and now look i will say though something seems weird if your friends if there's multiple friendships that are like have a problem with this then maybe there's something that you're not thinking about that you're doing that's affecting this because the common denominator

is you in this situation but if it's just about not picking up the phone and you are texting back and you're you know then it's kind of you know it's kind of an it's that's weird for them dude it's weird for them but also like maybe you could a little bit pick up the phone like if you're actually losing friends that you like because of this maybe like give a little bit and if you're gonna expect them to give a little bit understanding you maybe you give a little bit and uh maybe that will like absolve you in their eyes or take a a Xanax and say, call me in five. Ooh. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Yeah. Just don't take all the medications Matt took on that plane from Montreal. Don't take three and then get on a plane. Because then you pick up the phone and you'd be like, remind me on the best side. I can't. What was it?

You pick up the phone and don't call me. Don't call me as you pick up the phone. Nice. Okay, cool. It all comes full circle. Yeah, dude. That's rough though, man. And I'm sorry. And I hope we cheered you up. And I don't call me as you pick it up yeah nice okay cool it all comes full circle yeah dude that's rough though man and i'm sorry and i hope we cheered you up and uh i don't know where you're from it's he's from bulgaria but where's he living with the accent sounds english sounds african to me yeah oh yeah maybe yeah all right so next one what's up guys

um i love y'all's podcast thank y'all for doing this y'all give some really great advice um so i'm really hoping that maybe y'all could help me out a little bit okay um i'm a woman in a manly in a mainly male dominated industry i've been doing this for well over five years i've been with the same company since the beginning they've taught me everything i know and i'd say i'm fairly good at it recently my boss hired this guy and he has got over 20 years of experience he claims um and he has just come in and completely derailed everything he comes in and he goes behind me um he goes and tells my boss what time i show up to work what time i leave um and it's just caused a lot of trouble and he's only been with us for a couple months um he's taken the reins a lot over these jobs and i know it's not my place i'm not

the boss but i am a worker and i do i do good work i think i deserve a little bit of respect so what do y'all think i should do about that sounds like is it did you speed that up or did she speed it up i think um uh she uh that sounds i don't I don't jump to this conclusion ever, but it sounds like it might be a chauvinistic thing. You think? Yeah. Yeah, but that's what she's getting at. She's saying, how do I deal with that, though?

Oh. Well, she didn't say that. No. Did she say specifically what industry? I missed that. No, she didn't. Just that it's male-dominated? Okay.

Because obviously. I think that maybe. She works it. Just without, the thing is, if it is a chauvinistic thing, he would be defensive about being called out for that. So I think that what you should maybe do is just like have a sit down with him, but a casual one,

not like a hand to talk to you. Be like, you know, like, I've been doing this for a while. Like, I know how this goes. Like, you can give me more responsibility than I think you think I might be able to handle. Like, if you haven't said anything, start out by making it sound like you're giving him the benefit of the doubt. So he doesn't have to get all fucking.

It seems like, I feel like. Yeah, exactly. You know. So he doesn't have to get all fucking defensive and be like, well, I have 20 years of, you know what I mean? Yeah. Because you know how people get. Yeah. When they get told that they're not doing things right at the workplace.

Especially if they have a lot of experience, they get so fucking defensive. But yeah, start out that way. And if it continues or gets worse, it might be the kind of thing you have to go to the boss. Also, is he above you? It sounds like he's come in and taken a position of higher than her. Yeah, because that's annoying. Yeah, the guy sounds like a fucking tattletale though dude yeah that's the shit that's if you're a good worker and okay you leave early or get in late and but you're fucking killing it and firing on all cylinders and nothing's changed just the only thing that

changes that he's here right right you've always done it like that and you've been with the company for five six years she said right something like that so it's like fuck this guy dude yeah i fucking can't stand these motherfuckers man like the title aspect is crazy but dude he also like do your job right and if his job was to come in and figure out where the problems with the company is yeah it sounds like it's not you it sounds like it's not you uh i know that we're just hearing your side of the story but that's what why he was hired though okay but that's what i'm saying but it might be but if it wasn't okay then like if he came in to fucking be like i need to find out who the weak links are we need to get rid of them then okay but

be on your best behavior but obviously she seems like she would be so dude, the guy's a tattletale. He's chauvinistic and it's bullshit. And say, why don't you do this with Frank? If it comes down to it. Why don't you do this with Frank? Frank was late the other day. I'm not turning... Don't throw Frank under the bus. Maybe he does do it with Frank, though.

Well, if he does, then it's not a sexist thing. It's still a shitty thing, though. It's a shitty thing because he's still a tattletale. Yeah, he's still a tattletale and he's still like a nitpicky motherfucker. Yeah. So whether it's chauvinism or not, it still sucks is what I'm saying. Right, right, right. It sucks whether it's chauvinism or not.ale. Yeah, he's still a Tattletale and he's still like a nitpicky motherfucker. Yeah. So whether it's chauvinism or not, it still sucks, is what I'm saying.

Right, right, right. It sucks whether it's chauvinism or not, yeah. Yeah. But bring it up in like a casual setting and make sure, even though it's annoying, make sure it doesn't, he has no way of thinking it comes off as like any version of like complaining.

HR too. Yeah, but you don't want to jump to HR, right? No, you don't want to jump to HR. That's what I'm saying. The first thing you do is just offer the fact that you've been there a while, you know the ropes, and you can handle a lot of responsibility. And you've been there a while, you have your own habits. You would think that that would be okay.

I've been here for a long time. Everyone knows the way I work. Everyone's okay with it. As long as it's okay with you, I think i'm going to continue to do that yeah also he's been uh he has 20 years experience and you have but but he doesn't have 20 years experience of that place you're at that place longer than him so you have that under your belt yeah true yeah or in your skirt whatever i'm just trying to be on his level you know what i mean chauvinism wow but i'm not being chauvinist it's funny in doing so you're being chobish. Well, it's a joke. It's a comedy podcast.

I mean, that sucks, though. Yeah, that does suck. A guy that would be in CSI. What's up, Chris and Matt? So today I have a mental health question. So I'm an actor here based out of Atlanta. I'm 24. I've been committing to this for like five ish years now cool and i've been watching my friends graduate college the past few years and now they have their big boy jobs and they're all comfy and set right uh i've also been watching

friends like in the business kind of like really grow and um some of them made it right out of high school and you kind of really don't know the same struggles and i'm trying not to compare myself to other people it's much easier said than done yeah uh so what are some of the things that you kind of did in your earlier days to like power through like the struggle phase and like the the lows because honestly it's becoming really mentally heavy and it's hard not to feel like a loser and um i know 24 is like young in the eyes of guys 24 like the majority of the world i feel like i haven't accomplished enough and like i'm yeah it's it's heavy uh lately so please uh let me know uh some things i can do to kind of power through and keep myself

like in a good mental check uh yeah thanks all right you're 24 first of all second of all you look like an actor i was wondering before you started talking i said that you would be in csi yeah uh you know he calls it fucking amazing i don't want to make it about me but i called you did it's funny you didn't want to make it about you but you did so i remember when i was like this guy's british and he's like, oh, what's going on? But what I'm saying is, dude, 24 is nothing. And I know that's so annoying to actually hear. Because I was 24 and I was in the same situation, dude.

All of my friends were on TV shows. They were all bigger than me. Okay? Okay. Now look at you. No, I don't. But I just want to be like a decade what i was gonna say right but a decade later yeah yeah but what i was gonna say is they had different they're not

even actors but a day the oh one way to make yourself unhappy in any profession it doesn't matter what it is but especially some kind of any version of the arts or you know tv whatever the fuck acting is to fucking compare yourself to people that are your age comparison is the thief of joy i don't remember who said it was probably a lady that has like a fucking youtube channel but she was right well it's true comparison does take away all joy but what what you're not realizing when you compare you're only comparing yourself to people that are more what you're not realizing when you compare you're only comparing yourself to people that are more successful you're not taking into account the fucking billions of motherfuckers who are less successful than you it was theodore roosevelt who said that uh and a

lady from youtube who had a youtube channel obviously stole it from theodore roosevelt and i don't think that's cool to do to teddy but if you um yeah don't compare yourself try it's so fucking hard dude it's so hard but it's misleading i do it with jesus christ all the time and it's misleading it's unfair to yourself because it's misleading you're only taking into account the fucking tiny sample full of people who happen to be more successful i know i know it's true you're not taking into account the here's what you should do watch go on youtube and watch short films made by people that are generally your age oh you will be astonished at how shitty they are how much worse off than you they are and you will fucking feel better to know that that

is the vast majority of people will be hilarious if you had a youtube short on youtube now look you might as you might very well be one of those people if you are i'm sorry but i don't know i don't know what to tell you uh some you know something that'd be bad but my point is uh yeah don't compare yourself i know he but he knows not to compare himself he said it right he was like i don't mean to compare me i try not to compare myself but um but don't because it requires action you have to look up people to compare yourself yeah true true true that is stop doing that it's like going on fucking health i suggest get offline bump on your neck get offline you're an actor focus on your i hate when people say this but craft and then also you can take things into your uh you could take things you can what am i trying to say take things into your uh you could take you could

take control of your situation yes you can you don't it always it used to be about getting on a show getting on a fuck getting on csi getting on a sitcom getting on a fucking show on hbo it's not anymore you could make your shit happen you could create you can either write something or get somebody who you can partner with that it wants to write in the same situation that you're in get together in atlanta and write some fucking cool shit and post something right i mean good then you're kind of doing what matt said but don't make it shitty but don't be shitty yeah don't be shitty about it but make it come from your truth i get it trust me i get it dude all of my friends were successful before me man and you know then a second later it's like

they'll have different jobs but it's not and i'm not even trying to compare it don't compare yourself obviously when you're on the fucking also as well right yeah don't ever compare yourself right yeah but but my point is um it'll happen just keep going and dad always used to say this uh it's not going to happen the way you think it is but it'll happen yeah and um and it will do just keep going the frustrating thing about being an actor or anything in that industry in our industry is that is that there's no ladder that is established right to reach success you talk about people in business yeah people uh in health care in most professions there is a well-established road to get to where people want to go uh as they progress in their career it is not true as an actor or any other thing in the arts you can fucking at 48 get your

first big break and become a huge fucking actor it's it's actually that has literally happened like there's there are all different kinds of career paths and that is both the worst thing about doing what people like you do and also the best thing because it's the worst thing in the way that god damn it could take until you're fucking 48 to get your big break but you could also be the one motherfucker who had 47 and nothing going on and that, you fucking hit it big and you got the best fucking career you could have possibly imagined. There's no way of knowing. And it'll be that much sweeter then. It'll just, dude, just keep going, man.

You're 24. It's too early to fucking be upset and get, you know, I'm not trying to. This guy's still got baby powder on his fucking ass. This guy's still drooling all over his bib and his mommy's fucking taking it off and cleaning it. A little bit overboard, but yeah. This guy still fucking has no fucking pubic hair. Check your belly button. Do you have an umbilical cord coming out?

This guy literally still has no pubic hair. None. I would argue he probably has pubic hair. You saw his eyebrows. He literally hasn't gone through puberty at all he definitely has because it looks like two caterpillars are meeting in a pubic area is as hairless as his fucking behind okay okay it looks like two caterpillars are meeting at the forehead cafe he also he also had the beard that looks like it like he actually has five o'clock shadow yeah

yeah no matter what actually has his shave every morning because like he's got a full beard yeah yeah yeah it always looks like someone's walking in front of him like that's how much it he needs to shave like he's like why is it dark on your face okay um so anyway maybe it's the shadow of the fucking caterpillars the shadow of the caterpillars poetry i know i was just gonna say a movie with fucking Ashley Judd and Morgan Freeman. The Shadow of the Caterpillars. Fuck. When they meet on the forehead cafe, that means you're in trouble. Maybe they'll shoot it in Atlanta and he'll get a fucking role in it. Make a short film, The Shadow of the...

The Shadow... What is it? The Shadow of the Caterpillars and have it be about a serial killer who has the biggest fucking eyebrows that cast a shadow over his face and they look like caterpillars and have it be about a serial killer who has the biggest fucking eyebrows that cast a shadow over his face and they look like caterpillars and be the lead role. I always get to my destination. My eyebrows always get to the destination

two minutes before me. Put the lotion in the basket. Have a role like that, you know? The caterpillars want revenge after this coffee at the forehead cafe worst fucking plot of all time like what are you even saying you know what's happening those are the caterpillars ew no no no you do not make that sound they're drinking the cat i don't give a fuck what they're doing. I do not accept that sound. One, please.

Thank you. Look, we're going to think about it. We'll get back to you. Thanks for coming in, okay? Mime school. I look and they just go. All right, cool. Would we have one more or what?

Okay. Hey, Matt andris um my name is kate i'm a long time fan um i'm gonna try to be quick because i keep exceeding the limit so my question is about my marriage um i've been married for seven no nine years this is joan together about 17 years um my marriage is great it's good it's really good i married a really good guy uh we have three kids um but my question is about my husband like isn't able to open up to me he's not very um emotionally literate he doesn't really have feelings he doesn't share feelings doesn't share thoughts with me um beyond like day-to-day like kind of basic stuff um i tried to get him into therapy and he refuses like flat out that is his worst nightmare um so i started therapy

on my own and it's life-changing um Um, Chris, I'm kind of interested to hear your thoughts, knowing how you have transformed over the past few years. Um, so my question is, how do I get him to open up? Do I push him into therapy? How do I get him to open up in the meantime? How do I get him to be more like just more connected to me um okay thanks so much that's so interesting man like you know join the fucking club that's like the prime woman's complaint i know about men oh man it's true men are just like you know how ask a man how his day was he'll be like oh that's good yeah ask a woman how her day was just fucking watch the clock wow so high energy dude fucking how was your day and the woman just fucking i mean people walking by oh god oh god yeah rolls are coming yeah all right right right yeah yeah yeah dude it's so

and i'll tell you what dude i here's what fucking came up for me and then we'll get to you but man i'm like i open up so much i open up so much in therapy everywhere chris with chris for her like with my wife i open up so much like she'll like, how do you feel about this? And I go like this. I take a beat. I'm like Justin Trudeau when he was asked a question by the reporter and people like, oh, he didn't have an answer, but he was taking a beat, dude, you know? And so then I fucking start talking and shit. We have conversations and it's like, I'm not saying I deserve a medal, but dude, I

need to show her this. But was it always like that? Chris? Was it always like that? No. I'm saying you got to get to the place as a man that you understand the value of opening him up. Yes.

Men don't intrinsically know that women do. Right. So men have to learn the lesson of why the value of opening him up yes men don't intrinsically know that women do right so men have to learn the lesson of why it's valuable uh and i think i mean don't strong arm strong arm him into therapy but you can you can kind of like softly put your foot down about it someone did that for me once and it's like you know that relationship was a fucking disaster but the one good thing i got out of is that she actually did make me go to therapy you know yeah i i think if it's the kind of thing where you think it's affecting your marriage and you're you've grown into this uh person that it's important to i think it's worth saying like you know don't give him an ultimatum like oh you're either going to do therapy or i'm out but you should express to him how important it is for you to it for him to at least try it you

know what i mean because especially his aversion to it is a little bit i don't want to say it's not alarming i mean look the guy probably thinks his life is fine and it's going good he's got a great life but he might benefit from it yeah it also though like if he's got some trauma i have no idea what his who this guy is but like you know he's probably pretty level-headed you seem level-headed but like you know he might be trying to not want to talk about some stuff and not even know about it like he might sit down at therapy and she might be like at the first session he'd be like so how are you and he just goes fucking yeah yeah yeah just crying barbells you know what i mean in slow motion just crystal fucking like right do you know what i'm saying and then just crying so hard yeah and like some people don't want to confront that trauma yeah a lot of people don't and and and i

don't even think that's that bad you don't have to feel your feelings all the time but if you're feeling your feelings never it's a problem we got a problem and that might lead to crystal barbells flying right uh but ultimately those crystal barbells if you stay at it they turn into less and less and less less crystal barbells and then suddenly you're not only feeling better but you know how to communicate better yeah uh but yeah you really gotta figure not like you you want to like trick him into this but like there has to be a way to get him to understand the price he is paying by being a person that doesn't open up. He's paying a price, whether he knows it or not,

and somehow he must be illuminated to that fact. You often talk like the bad guy from The Matrix. I don't do that. I don't do that. Illuminating, like you do it, but it but it's okay also he should open up because that stuff becomes cancer later on for sure yeah like you that's what i'm saying those are one of the those are one of the costs of not opening up you need to release crystal barbells also otherwise that shit will and then becomes cancer and you got melanoma on your chest dude

try to get him to go to fucking better out he doesn't have to get off his couch yeah go to bed dude yeah give him the code for better help for our shit um and it's really uh i don't know it's it is weird though that there are still guys that are like no way not therapy that's for fucking women or whatever the fuck you know that's for like people who have real problems yeah yeah yeah let me tell you something buddy you probably got problems if you're that adamantly against yeah yeah stripping yeah oh look at that look at that look at that okay i guess it's been an hour hasn't it yeah i guess it has but also um yeah that's it sounds good got lint all over me. That's great. But dude, that's the life, the spin move mentality hoodie that you can get on lifelinemerch.com.

And if you want one-on-one advice, his sessions with Matt, he books them up. They're booked, you know, go to mattdalia.com. You got to get in there. And if you have a question, go to watchlifeline.com.

Another thing is, your boy's going to be in Denver. Your boy's going to be in Albany. Your boy's goingcom. Another thing is, your boy's going to be in Denver. Your boy's going to be in Albany. Your boy's going to be in San Diego. Your boy's going to be in New York. Your boy's going to be in Chicago. Your boy's going to be in Springfield. Your boy's going to be in fucking Midland, Texas.

Your boy's going to be in a lot of different places. Your boy's going to be in Seattle. Your boy's going to be in Portland. Your boy's going to be in Lakeland. Your boy's going to be in, you know what I mean? Your boy's everywhere. Your boy's omnipresent. Yep.

I'm omnipresent. So that's it, man. So come on and see me on tour at chrislea.com. And that's that. Yay!