Lifeline - 76. Bristopher Nolan

Episode Date: September 24, 2023

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Let's go seize the night. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash yamex. Benefits vary by car and other conditions apply. Let's see what you got going on here. you look good you look good you know what i thought when you walked in my ass what that you never wear red and you look good in red thanks you know i don't really wear red i don't i don't don't wear red ever no you think you know mom always said i look good in red she was right she was she was I guess. I don't wear red because it's such a like, hey, well, not that I don't wear hey look at me clothes, but I don't know.

It always feels like a hey look at me color to me. And why has that always stopped you? You always wear hey look at me. I know. I don't know. Well, you know what it comes from to me? Honestly, the reason why I don't want to wear red is because I genuinely dislike red cars. That's, I think, why.

You know you're not a car? You never know? I don't know. I have had people inside me. And you know I go 100 miles an hour, baby. I was so dumb. I spoke with somebody who used to be a crip. Okay.

And he was talking about wearing red. Yeah. Just can't do it. Oh, you told me this. Yeah. And he was talking about wearing red. Yeah. Just can't do it. Oh, you told me this. Yeah. That's crazy, huh? And you told me, what is it, the C? They can't say...

Oh, yeah. They don't say, like, they don't say cool. They'll say... Oh, wait. The crips will? All I know is that they say, instead of, like, cool, they'll say bull. No, bloods. Yeah. No, Bloods. Yeah.

Yeah. Bloods won't even use words that have a C in them. Man, I'm so branky. Well, I follow this guy on Instagram named Still Brazy. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I follow him too. Wait, I told you about him, right?

I don't think so. Oh, no. I told somebody else about him. We talked about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Because it's crazy.

I have no idea what it meant. Brazy is crazy, yeah. But I guess he used to be a- Oh, is that right? Blood, yeahzy you know i'm brazy i go brazy as hell i go brazy but um yeah who's your favorite favorite filmmaker mine's west braven um wow i feel that uh well mine is bristopher nolan so i uh Mine is Christopher Nolan. Nah, but anyway, dude. Episode 76, wow. Mine is Alfred Hitchcock.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Sub-a-c-my-bock. Sub-a-c-my-bock. I can't believe how long it took me to know what you were doing. Oh, sub-ack my bock. In Rewind. It sounds like you're being rewound.

So episode 76, Sunday. Hey, Sunday's up for Lifeline. Go sign up for Lifeline Luxury, patreon.com slash lifelineluxury. You know we got those brazy episodes on. We got those brazy eps on there. It's the best show. It's the Kest show. What Ips on there uh it's the best show yeah it's the cast show what i don't get is it is the best show should be getting millions and millions and millions of hits

um yeah lifeline luxury anyway go hit it up uh you can go see me on tour where am i going to be i'm going to be in cleveland and pittsburgh and uh fort myers and orlando and uh redding and philadelphia and uh virginia i always forget that one, Virginia, but I am RNI. I'm going to be in Virginia, aren't I? God damn, I am going to be RNI. Isn't that crazy? Wow. Yep.

It's just a soup of words with no space in between any of them. You got a question, click on the link description below. Go to Watch Lifeline or go to WatchLifeline.com. You also can dial the number and leave a message anonymously on our hotline. But yeah, send us a video. We love hearing from you. You're great. We love follow-up videos and we love message anonymously on our hotline. But yeah, send us a video. We love hearing from you. You're great.

We love follow-up videos and we love new videos too from the new people. You want a one-on-one session? Do you? Well, you should want one. It's a confrontational. And if you do want one

because you should want one, you should book one with me at mattdelié.com. Your secrets are safe with me. And if you want the merch, get it all at lifelinemerch.com. You're going to look good in it i guarantee it wait not like a legally binding guarantee but oh subbuck my babuck it would be not box just was thinking about that um oh subbuck my babuck that's gangster to be like

that can't even put it with a ck yeah babuck yeah the babadook it's just about that's a crip's dick or a Bloods dick. That's a good movie. No, it's not. Oh, really? It's not. It's not about that. Oh, okay.

That movie is not about a Crips Dybbuk. Dybbuk? Wow, Dybbuk is a real thing. It is. And Dybbuk should be up for the Jewish. There is a movie called The Dybbuk. Yeah, I'm sure. It's recent.

My buddy has the shoe company called Dybbuk, and they make really good shoes. Oh, yeah. What, Donnie? Is it him? Yep, Donnie Dybbuk. go look at his stuff anyway with the dice yes i seen him so uh actually you know what i know i told you this but there's an addendum to this story and i know you know this i think i told it in the lifeline group chat all right i'll just tell it yeah we don't know what it is yet you do once i start it i know but everyone needs to know okay i'm having a conversation with kristin on the patio of the coffee shop block i used to run that used to be the coffee bean and tea leaf and now it's an

alfred's coffee okay so it's better but you think it's worse it's worse right it's better 99.9% of the population would say it's better you are in the 0.1% that would say it's worse okay go ahead because i'm a genius and so so we're we're having a conversation kristin is looking at me and i'm looking to her and i am facing the street you know where this is going i do i think i do yeah um a car pulls up on the street and stops because it's at it's waiting for a red light okay i'm talking to kristen she's telling me something important actually to where i i can rack focus behind her and i see the window is open in the passenger seat and inside is somebody staring at me and as i rack focus i see it's bruce willis okay question okay at this point you say oh that's bruce willis i didn't say that

yet in your mind uh-huh uh in you how much and how quickly rather did you absolutely no for sure it was him instantaneously just immediately it was immediately that was that's bruce was you know why because he was looking directly at me i made eye contact with him and he was he was actually doing his bruce willis smirk where he was like yeah i can't do it but you know i'm talking about right he's being bruce he's being bruce willis okay got it so i she's telling me something important and actually emotional okay oh no so i'm seeing now i'm seeing bruce willis oh god okay what a dilemma yeah so i'm like oh fuck i don't know what to do that's terrible but and i actually think i need to be here for her but but she'd want to see bruce

willis but you also also you got to be there for Bruce, too. He's looking right at you. Something's going on. Right. So I'm like, now in my head, I'm like, is Bruce Willis famous enough to where I should stop this and tell Kristen about it? Okay. Because if it was Barry Pepper, I would just tell her later afterwards. No offense to Barry Pepper.

No, we love you, you Barry Giovanni Ribisi I probably wouldn't do it either No way of course not Anybody from Save It Ryan Besides Matt Damon And Tom Hanks I don't think I'd do it Unless it was Tom Slytherin

Because he's dead And I'd be like Why is he alive Ted Danson No He's not in it He is He's got a little role in it

Oh he is Yeah Wouldn't do Ted Danson No Not Ted Danson So So I'm like I gotta say something And I So I'm like, I got to say something.

And I say, I'm sorry, babe, but that's Bruce Willis. Yeah, he's one of the most giant movie stars. He's one of the most giant movie stars of all time. There's no doubt you have to stop and say, yeah. And I'm a huge fan of his. Yeah, you are, yeah. Right? So I say, I'm sorry, babe, but that's Bruce Willis.

And she looks over, okay? And Bruce willis is still staring directly at me and how close are we talking let's see uh how far would you say that wall is over there 30 30 40 feet okay so 35 yeah something like that 60 feet twice oh that's close though yeah it's very close yeah yeah okay so he's 60 feet away and then i i he's looking at me and i say that's bruce willis i guess i say it loud enough yeah which i really didn't try to but a few of the people around me go like this so now yeah bruce willis look at me everybody's looking at bruce willis okay on the patio okay so now i'm like i have to say something i guess because i don't i don't know why he's looking at me all right and he's not looking away at any point he's just staring no dude he is not looking away at any point he is staring at you're not weirded

out even a little bit i'm very interested in what is happening what is going on here yeah why is he staring at me yeah did he just watch my netflix? It's like this kind of thing where I'm like, did he just see a clip of mine or something? Or, or do I look like a guy that like fucked his ex? Like this is how he's looking at me. Right. So I say to him loud, cause now everybody's kind of involved in a way. And I want to jump past the part of awkwardness and I can do it like this. And I say, Hey man, we all love you. Right. And I say that that loud because I want him to know, because I know he's also going through that thing with,

with the brain fog and all that. He's not doing well. He's not doing so well, but I got to tell you something. He looks fantastic. He looks, he's Bruce, but he looks fantastic.

But you know, you, you know, you sometimes you see a guy after you haven't seen him in a while and you're like oh they look really old yeah he looks great he looks great okay so i say hey man we all love you and everyone's looking at him and he leans out of the car yeah and he goes like this that much a lot okay you told the story wrong dude but first i told it on text so i know but to know how could i how could i get this through text? There's no way. Just that part, voice note. It would have been such a different thing.

You didn't do enough O's in the word. I wanted to do it on the podcast. All right, then say that. I'm asking. And that's it. And then the guy who's driving him, that looks like Akon, by the way, he's going like this,

pointing at me. And Bruce is like, woo,'s going like this pointing at me and bruce is like and they so he's literally that says no words no words only woos that's and then later on i'm telling this story recalling it to kristin and someone else and chris is like well he was looking at me and i'm like oh dude it's possible no it's not how do you know i guess maybe because her back was to him right wow hey come her back and i was staring at him from the beginning and and she was here i was here bruce was there so when she turned around boom it looked like she was looking back into the left back into the left but it looked like he was looking at her obviously he was looking at me because i fucking said the thing and also he's looking at me in the beginning so i get that okay no the best part was no who's that

guy from the bear the actor jim Jimmy? Jeremy Allen White? Yeah. Before the Bruce Willis thing, I walked by that guy. And I was looking at him as I was walking by because when you're famous and you see another famous guy, you got to look at each other and be like. Okay. So I was walking by and I went to go look at him and he didn't look at me so i was like hey man okay and then i went in and i got the bruce willis thing maybe he didn't see you though could have been but but i walked right by him why and i and then and then so jokes on him because i got the bruce willis thing yeah you that? So jokes on him because I got the Bruce Willis thing after that. Yeah, you don't even need him because you got the biggest movie star.

I was like, ah, man, that sucks. You know, the bear guy didn't kind of look at me. And I was making sure to, I was ready for the famous, to receive the famous, oh, we are both in this together. You didn't even know his name. He's not on Bruce Willis' level. Exactly. And then I got the Bruce Willis thing. And then not only that

bruce willis was one that started it and he also did the woo like for so long according to you yeah was everyone else like what is he doing no because the whole thing was weird it was like they were like i can't believe we saw bruce willis okay for me there's another day in the office you know but for everyone else i get it wait but no i i want to stick more with the crazy wooing he did i don't know why he did that did he really do it for that long i might have been doing it maybe i did two woos extra he did a lot of woos why did he do so many woos that was fantastic is that part of his thing well no i don't think it was i here's the thing it he did not in any way seem out of it oh or incoherent or anything like that he just seemed like he was having a fun time

maybe he was on drugs i don't know i have no idea i mean i have no idea about any of that yeah so that's what happened damn but kristen thinks it was for it was for her and i you know it's just like okay anyway that's my story all right yeah that's a that's a pretty good story yeah thanks yeah oh the addendum i didn't even tell you the addendum there's an addendum there's an addendum i said that there was going to be an addendum oh okay i thought that was okay yeah dude i'm at a fucking grocery store today eating yeah and i i'm just eating i'm having a you know i eat healthy i got cod i'm eating cod it doesn't matter the story but i am that doesn't matter yeah eating at a grocery store yeah that's what I'm eating cod. It doesn't matter the story, but I am very healthy. Eating at a grocery store?

Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Eating cod at a grocery store. Dude, are you 78? What the fuck? Eating cod at a grocery store. 78 years old. You know? I don't feel shame about it at all.

You shouldn't. I'm just saying. Yeah, you're 78. I'm with two other people. I'm just saying. Yeah, you're 78. Okay, keep going. I'm with two other people, okay? Okay. Famous. You're with them? Yeah, I'm with them.

They're famous? Oh, yeah. Okay. So three famous people. But that doesn't matter the story at all. I know. I'm just telling you. None of this matters. I'm coloring it like a novelist talks about the clouds

when they're really the books about the guy. Start saying the parts that matter. Okay. I'm eating the cod yeah that doesn't seem like it matters but but i gotta and i'm doing it and we're having a conversation rumor willis walks by his daughter who we know this is a fucking willis like for me just like a heavy willis week. It's a Willis Fest. Is that the whole story?

Just weird, right? That's not weird. That's not weird, really. That's not weird? Not really. They're two different people, you know? They're in the same family, dude. Yeah, but they're not.

Yeah. Yeah. You don't think it's weird if one day somebody sees Matt Thalia and the next day they see Chris Thalia? It's weird. There we go, dude. It's a little weird, yeah. Anyway, dude. Joke's on that Jimmy Page Allen guy. guy i wonder who you're gonna see tomorrow you're gonna see demi tomorrow or the other bruce willis scout three i think he has four they have four daughters together

i don't know lemonade is a popular drink and it still is i get more props and stunts than bruce willis okay shout out to guru Rest in peace Oh he's dead For a long long time Damn R.I.P. He's the man So anyway Was the man

Let's do it Let's do one It's so dark Hi Matt and Chris My fiance and I Watch you every week We love you guys But my question

Is that we're getting Married in May And my stepdad Wants to have a Father daughter dance My real dad is probably not going to be okay with that. He's like typical hotheaded, very emotional Italian father. And I think he'd be hurt if I had a dance just with my stepdad. I think it would like lessen the

importance of the father, real father daughter dance. So you are going to have a father, but my stepdad was, has been there since I was a kid. He spent money on the wedding and I want to do something special for him too, but I don't want to one up the father, daughter dance. So if you have any advice on what I should do, um,

or any ideas on what to say to either of them, that would be super chill. Thank you so much love you guys bye all right here's the thing first of all a lot of people say i don't know how to i don't know how to tell the person that uh that's a common thing people call in to show yeah it is true almost always the answer is how you just said it to us yeah yeah dude that's oh it's like there's no how would you say it on lifeline that's what you would yeah that's the answer like you would say it just the way you did it was honest it made sense it was it was respectful of everyone's feelings you

don't need to come up with this whole way how do i do it how do i do you just did it just do it to a different person that being said can't you just have the father daughter dance with your real dad and then have like another nice thing with your stepdad later that's what i'm saying yeah like just have a whole you its own thing don't have it compete with your actual dad have it be separate everyone can be happy and if your real dad gets upset about that we got an asshole on our hands well honestly but he he's an italian guy he's a hot-headed italian she said so he's also if this guy's paying for the wedding like why isn't your dad doing like come on the guy came out every which way yeah i know you're not dancing with your stepdad right yeah i know you'd never do that to me right yeah that's how it's gonna be and then fucking

later and then after that it's gonna be like and now the dance with the stepdad and you're gonna hear are you fucking kidding me from the back for christ's sakes this guy's not gonna pay and he's dictating who you can dance with like no this guy this guy come on you came from my balls sweetheart and you're gonna dance with somebody whose balls you didn't come from wow the speed his speech yeah you know i was gonna come up here and give a really great speech about my daughter and how great she was i remember times we were playing light bright and shit but let me tell you something man this disrespectful motherfucker all right first of all her second of all this no nuts motherfucker all right she came from my balls okay she came from my balls all right i jizzed out in her twat right there stand up stand up i know we're not on good terms stand up point to your twat that one point to your all right now this no nuts you stand up

you stand up point to your nuts she didn't come from there you know where she came from pulls out his nuts right there and she's gonna disrespect her father me she's gonna disrespect me let him come out of my nuts i get a dance and then he also gets a dance so what do i get another dance here we go band hit it come here daughter wow this ball still out play what i want this time cisco wow wow dude i don't think it'll go that badly but just if it does your real dad's dickhead you know a lot of times people's real dads are dickheads yeah it's true yeah yeah um but yeah just have it to do its own your own separate thing with the other guy yeah it's only right he's been with you since you were a little kid he paid for a fucking wedding

and you love him this is 2023 not everything's all cut and dry perfect like it used to be i mean not like things used to be perfect but i mean like the family unit it's sloppy it's messy that's how it is though so now i get another dance invent your own shit go hits play sinatra come on all the kids are crying you know at the wedding uh yeah make shit up more people need to do that at weddings anyway don't do like the shit everyone's always done true make it yours yeah fuck all this fucking shit everyone's always yeah the traditions they're not your traditions you know me i don't believe in i don't like traditions at all make sure you're all having

fun at your wedding the everyone's enjoying themselves that's it i went to a wedding this past i guess two weekends ago well three weekends ago when this comes out but um it was great the way they did the thing they they wanted to do um a uh they wanted to not announce the people when they come out afterwards and they just all came out at once they're like give it up for the bridal party and the groomsman and they just all ran out it was really cool like a sport like a like a yeah like a sporting event okay like notre dame or something i'm clapping for that wedding yeah it was good that was a good wedding dude shout out to dom and mariel um dom and mariel dom and mariel thanks dom and mariel yeah so anyway all right all right next one so bitter you weren't in the wedding that's great hey boys i need some advice here so uh my co-worker is like 45 and i'm 27 and i'm a nice guy

and he's nice he's really really nice uh but i just get the feeling that he needs a lot of attention like grew up military kid traveled around a lot i don't know that he had a lot of friends because he just does not seem socially aware and there's days that i have a lot of capacity for it and i can shoot the shit and then there's days i just don't and i end up kind of like not exploding but snapping being like very rude how do i handle it man like it's legitimately he's an older person but he'll come in being like he'll ask you questions that he's wanting you to ask him the question hope your weekend was good and you're like yeah it was hope yours was too and he's like yeah did your kid get a lot of sleep and you're like yes and he's like mine didn't and you're like oh fucking here we go now we're going into how you're doing this guy's fun and i swear

to god dude the other day he said blast as i like upset he was like oh blast who the fuck does that man love you guys thanks This guy's funny. I like this guy. I think you're mad at the wrong things here. I don't. I like blast. Dude, say whatever you want. No, but here's the thing.

You need to develop a relationship with this guy where it's okay for you to be like, why are you fucking doing this shit? That's exactly right. And you can do it in a humorous way. It might be too late now to do that. He fucked up probably. that's exactly right and you can do it in a humorous way it might be too late now to do that but you can also just do it in a boundaries actual way and be like hey which i don't i'm not i'm a big fan on not not you know just being making making a joke about it i got problems so um but but you can um you can do that you should do it you're funny though he should have done that

already you're saying he but what do you mean the boundary you're saying he can say look like i'm this and this and you're like hey man you know i don't like when this happens i like you but like why do you do this you don't have to do that like yeah you know yeah god that's hard because you're telling somebody what their like issues are kind of kind of i mean try to do it try to do it like it makes me feel from that i agree though start just like you're obviously a funny guy in a funny way be like what the fuck like why do you do this like what try that yeah just try it it'll also help her i know you like you just want to tell me about your weekend so like go ahead what are you doing yeah don't make me answer first i know and you might

be funny dude you might feel weird about it doing it the first few times but also that makes you funnier because you'll be able to signal while you're doing it the first few times but also that makes you funnier because you know while you're doing it signal to him that you are also having fun with it here's the other thing though you gotta learn he's his boss right uh no he's a co-worker okay you got then even just the same you gotta you gotta coexist with this person yeah so you there's no choice so you don't want to just like be irate all the time like you are you son of a bitch why do you fucking bring up my kids sleep when you know i want to you gotta just learn how to have fun with it like lean into how ridiculous the person is

and have fun collecting stories about him so you can talk shit about him when he's not around walk here's what you do next time you see him, say, hey, gotta ask you, why did you say blast? Is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is it the 1940s? Yeah, yeah, he'll like that. He'll laugh at that.

I hope he would. If he didn't, then that's crazy. Or you could be like, dude, congratulations. It's crazy, but you look fantastic for your age. And he'll say like, really? How old do you think i look and then say 45 and then when he says i am 45 say that can't be you said blast you're at least 90 so long to get to the punchline um yeah blast huh that's pretty funny though the guy that they got

i'm gonna start saying blast i like that guy i going to be 45 in a few years, though. I like that guy. But I look great. The co-worker, what? But I look great. It's all right. All right, yeah. Breathe in, breathe out.

I had that stuck in my head because you said lean in. And now I'm thinking of that. Great. One of those things, huh? I mean, you know I could be it could be a far it could be a thing all right all right hey Matt and Chris this is Sarah in autumn coming to you from Connecticut I am looking for advice not not for me, but for my fiance. I love him dearly. I want to preface with that.

But he goes on paternity leave when mine ends. And I work from home. And I need you to give him advices on what he can do on his paternity leave so he doesn't drive me nuts. And I say that with all of the love. Right. All of the advices you give

funny, serious, we love you, we watch the show together, so I hope he enjoys watching this. Can't wait to see you come to connecticut soon matt we love you as well so does autumn um see you guys soon thanks look at how cute that baby babies are never that cute yeah well no you know what it is baby that you know what it is that baby is so close to birth that they're not usually cute yet that's what i'm saying yeah yeah

yeah but i'm saying really newborns i'm saying it just like like scores better wait what are you saying i'm saying it like leagues better than you are no i'm saying babies at that age are never cute that baby's insanely cute that's what you said now but what you said then which was what which was that baby's really cute wow and then i said it leagues no you no you just didn't hear me i said babies are never cute yeah that's what you did say but i'm saying it leagues better being like oh babies that age are never that you mean newborns yeah yes which is a better way to say it even still close to birth newborns are fucking always ugly or look like aliens i don't i don't one or the other i don't agree the ugly thing i think that the i think that it is it's cute in that sense that's a that's a personal yeah it is a personal taste though

yeah i'm saying like objectively they're like they do look yes they they they look very well they look non-human right well also think about it though like they just went through the most traumatic thing ever yep their faces are red they've been through some trauma and like fucking bouncing around birth was traumatic for me but then in the in 2020 it was harder but yeah cool traumatic thing ever yep their faces are red they got shit over them and like fucking bouncing around birth was traumatic for me but then in the in 2020 it was harder but yeah cool man uh yeah so what about i'll tell you what i'd rather be born again than go through that shit okay i'm saying but anyway advice for autumn autumn's dad autumn's dad autumn's dad dude how to not drive his wife crazy well i think it i think

i think it i think it falls a little bit more on you i think you need to set some sort of god i hate this word but boundaries you need to set some sort of this is my work area this is my work room this is when i'm working when i'm working here don't bother me unless it's an emergency right don't just be like where are the diapers you fucking Find them right or whatever I don't know I don't know what kind of relationship they have with the you know If it's 50 50 or if it's like it sounds like 50 50 he's taking paternity leave but

Um yeah I think that it falls More on you to be like Yo this is my space I gotta work From now to now take care of this shit Don't come to me unless somebody's bleeding Okay there's that but there's also For him i would say the advice is probably something like you're gonna not know what to do because not only are you off of work and you're usually at work but you have all this free time but you also have a newborn baby and you have no experience with those

things and that's difficult right and then you have your wife who on top of that just went through labor and is recovering from that and a lot of other shit going on hormonally it's like it's crazy time do the things that are expected of you ask if you can do more whatever those things are do them and then once that's done get the fuck away because you're going to be annoying if anyone ever talked to me that way i would be out i'll tell you okay and here's the other thing she's asking the question wrong she's saying i'm how do i give my advice no i know i know i'm giving advice to him no i know yeah but she's saying how do i give advice to my how do you or i give advice to uh like you us or i her she's saying advice to my husband to not drive me crazy the advice should be how do i make sure my husband

doesn't drive me crazy when he's home from paternity leave but i'm telling you that because that's much better okay but she watches it with her husband they're gonna watch it he's gonna watch it so she's calling for him. Okay. Which she made very clear, but you weren't listening. No, no, I do know that, but I'm just saying,

Hey dude, she's about to tell you something. Now then just, now you look at him and tell him what I just said about you. Hey, this is my workspace and I'll just do it. She has her own workspace and also figure it out unless someone's bleeding. Wow.

So that was totally unnecessary, which is all good. But yeah, man, just stay away and don't annoy. Just in general, don't annoy someone who's just been through something really, really crazy. Like birth. No, I don't. Yeah, for the mother, yeah. Yeah, for the mother.

Also help, just help. What's up, Chris and Matt? I love the show. I the mother. Also, help. Just help. What's up, Chris and Matt? Love the show. I'll just get right to it. What do you say or do to someone who is chewing so

ridiculously loud that it makes you want to do violence on that person got a co-worker i'm with him every now and then and uh i mean we're literally stuck in this tiny van an invisible friend nowhere to go lunchtime's the worst usually eating with a clenched fist yeah let me know what i can do yeah that's tough dude i'd eat outside of the van i think honestly that's disgusting you have to say something yeah for sure something you gotta say like because sometimes honestly i've okay so i would love it if this guy would love

it if in particularly that guy he's talking about saw this and wasn't didn't know he's going to be seeing it and he would be like oh the chiller yeah yeah for sure yeah because you know it's him because he knows he sits there so i have done this before i've i asked somebody once who i was eating around a lot yeah why they chewed the way that they chewed yeah because it always bothered the hell out of me and it was like you know when you see somebody chewing with their mouth full yeah you're like well were you never a kid yeah yeah because when i was a kid 20 because when i was a kid if i ever made that mistake for half of a chew yeah some adult would have been there and said don't chew with your mouth 100 and susie be like close your mouth when you chew. Right.

So if you skipped all that, like how did you, you couldn't possibly skip all that. So you must have not been a child. Yep. They weren't children, right? You were born at 20? Say it to the guy. Yeah, exactly. Just so roundabout our advice for this episode. You were born at 20?

What? Well, because you couldn't have been a kid, right? What are you talking about? So when you're a kid and you're doing things that you aren't supposed to be doing right adults stop you i mean this would be with your mouth open this would be pretty good way yeah yeah yeah in all honesty that would be great but um yeah like it's just it's it's it's anyway what i did i brought it up and i said i don't remember exactly how i said it but it was rude it's rude because when you confront somebody like that so there's no way to not be rude yeah my issue is that sometimes i know that

and i lean into the rudeness because i'm like we both know rude is coming right right right and i like that you know what i mean i appreciate it yeah cool thanks you're the only one and uh you know i'm like that so what happened is the person said back to me an actual reason then i felt bad yeah they they have they had something with their mouth where like they to actually close their mouth and chew like caused them pain and so then there i was literally shaming someone who kind of had like un unbeknownst to me, like a disability with their mouth, you know? Yeah. So maybe there's something like that going on.

There's that possibility, but there's also the possibility that you're dealing with a fucking slob who was never a child. And if that's the case, do what my brother just did. Why don't you just say this? Are you a slob or do you have a disability? What if after that the guy said my chewing yeah right it's happened dude happened before i you talking about my chewing i um i have a friend that chews absolutely disgusting no condition no not open like that or just like i honestly i don't even want to describe it because it's going to make me feel disgusting yeah okay okay fair yeah and i said ah you chew all fucked up huh

and he was like what and i was like you chew fucked up it's gross don't do it like that right because it's disgusting okay nice and i was like i just chew like this i don't know man it tastes good and i was like yeah but it's fucking disgusting for everyone right and i got another guy in and i was like that's fucking disgusting right and he was like well you chew kind of with your food up front and you know it's disgusting yeah the whole restaurant and so the hostess come by you do choose really fucked up yeah people from other restaurants you've been here but you've been to mine before and it's disgusting um but yeah and so i did do that and uh and i remind him whenever i see him it doesn't change every time no no no if i'm eating

i'm like ah yeah that's right i forgot you didn't change the fucking guy's married and shit like what's he gonna change someone married him i can't believe it to be honest i can't believe dude i would never be able to marry someone who chewed with the disgust with their mouth open good looking dude great guy funny choose disgusting that's tough man yep close everyone listening now pay attention to how you chew if you happen to chew with your mouth open fucking close it it's also not the regular mouth open disgusting chew he does he does a specific thing i think i know i don't want to hear it i don't want to say it's on we owe it to the audience he leaves the food in yeah in front of his yeah i knew it dude and and you can see when he chews it it's in it's in front it's in like it's dip oh my god

fuck that guy dude and and it's disgusting and when you choose it you can see the strings from up okay man okay i'm just saying imagine i'm eating tuna okay but i'm just saying i did already okay and i don't want i don't know why he does that, dude. Stop it. If he's listening now, does he know? Well, I'll tell him. I'll text him about it. Does he know?

If he's listening now, does he know it's him? I'll text him right now and see what he says afterwards. I'm not going to say who it is, though. He's also not listening to this. Oh, okay. All right. Let me see here. I'll update you.

All right. Hey, man. You chew fucked up huh fucked up huh do i know this person just yeah thinking about it i think i might know do i maybe is it possible that i know who it is maybe okay all right i'll see what he says. All right. Hey, Chris and Matt. Love the show.

I think it's a great thing what you guys are doing. Thanks. I'm a longtime listener, but this is my first submission. Cool, dude. So we'll see how it goes. Anyways, I have this family member who, for the last six years, myself and others have been encouraging him to go to therapy. Wow.

And anyways, we're in this loophole where he says he'll do it to make us feel better and then never does it. And he really needs it. The last update we got, he had actually booked an appointment, which gave us some hope. And then I texted him the day of his appointment asking him how it went. And he canceled it because it was a remote session and he didn't think he'd get anything out of it now i've been to therapy remote and in person chris i know you've been to therapy maybe you could share some words of wisdom but i guess the advice i'm looking for is just what do i do I know in-person therapy is really hard to find right now.

Yeah. Wow. And yeah, what do I do? Cause he's, he's very valuable to me. Like he's a, this is a relationship that I don't want to let go, but he's not getting better and I, he's not pleasant to be around. And I just frankly don't like being around him. Anyways, yeah. Dude, how do you make somebody do something that they don't want to do? Anyways, thanks, guys. Looking forward to hear what you have to say. The answer is you cannot cannot you can absolutely not make someone do something they don't want to do so that being

said you've tried a number of ways to get him to go to therapy you think that'll make a difference if not even if it doesn't make a difference immediately you know it would be a gesture signaling that he actually wants to change and cares what his friends and people close to him think about him but like dude you don't want to be around him he doesn't want to do the thing you're suggesting i mean the solution is right in front of you man you you got to stop hanging out with this guy also that's just how it is yeah if people don't want to change even though you've suggested a number of ways that they could possibly go about it and they don't even want to try those things that might result in them changing they they're going to come up with...

Some motherfucker who's never been in therapy is going to say, oh no, I don't think remote therapy would work on me. That's crazy. You don't fucking know anything, dude. Like he's just going to come up with some excuse and he's going to continue to come up with those excuses. So do yourself a favor and move on from this dude.

This guy's fucking not a good friend. You don't like him. You don't like being around him. I think he says family member. You don't owe him. You don't like being around him. I think he says he's a family member. You don't owe everyone your friendship just because you have been friends with them. I think he said he's a family member. It's not. Oh.

He didn't say that because it's not his family. Okay, I thought he said it. Anyway, but thanks for cutting me off. Jumped down my throat. No, but it's good that you cut me off four different times throughout the thing I was saying. To make sure you said something that wasn't true. But yeah, dude, you don't owe. I just hate. saying to make sure the wrong thing you said something that wasn't true but uh yeah dude you don't oh i just hate i don't like when people think yeah they like have you don't owe this

shit you don't need to be this person's friend just because you have been this person's friend if they're being a bad friend then don't be their friend it's family there shouldn't be such thing as a bad friend because once you start becoming a bad friend you're not a friend anymore that's good i like that thank you that's almost as good as the saying go ahead and call the cops i'll have sex with them it's up there um yeah you the other thing you can do is try and maybe you have tried this but work the prescription medicine angle. Like, it'd be like, yo, if you go to this, they could give you a prescription to something that might actually help you.

You could try that angle, be like, that's how you can directly benefit from it. You know, you think you won't benefit from it from a Zoom session, which is not true. It's very weird. But also, you know, they could prescribe something to you that could absolutely help you

so unless it's against medication or the whole thing in which case matt's right yeah dude like i mean the guy it sounds like you love this dude and that breaks my heart but like doesn't change doesn't change the advice man like if that person is not going to take a single step in a direction to improve or address the things that people around him who love him are trying to get him to address then like he's not participating in the friendship or uncle or son or brother because it's a family member but yeah but yeah no the same does same is true of a family member you don't owe your family your time like you just you just you keep people in your life that, you just, you keep people in your life that are good for you.

You keep people in your life that you respect, that respect you back. But you can't just keep someone in your life just because you have been friends with them up to this point. That's not a good reason. Yeah.

That can count extra. Yeah. Like if the friendship is still there. Yeah, exactly. But it can't be the only thing. Yeah. When shit's hanging on by a thread They get credit for it. Yeah, exactly. But it can't be the only thing. Yeah. Yeah. When shit's hanging on by a thread.

Yeah. All right. Yeah. Cool. Sounds good. Next. Hey, what up, Matt and Chris? How you doing?

Chris, I saw you when you came to Sydney. Like, I don't even know how long ago. It was like 20 years ago by now. I was trying to please 2018. Please come back soon. You were hilarious. And Matt. Thank you. You are so funny on Lifeline. long it was like 20 years ago by now please come back soon you were hilarious um and matt thank you you are so funny on lifeline and i think you give amazing advice thanks for everything you guys do

thanks man my problem is with my girlfriend i love her to death but whenever we pick a movie she refuses to give good movies a chance you know she would rather watch a shitty netflix movie then watch an actually decent movie i mean so she's 20 i'm a big movie guy i studied film i'm a big movie buff i personally believe that all the best movies in the world have already been made not to say new movies can't be good right but let's be honest all the best movies already exist sure so whenever i'm trying to convince her to watch you know your matrixes your fight clubs signs of lambs pulp fictions whatever those kind of movies she just won't do it she she just doesn't want to watch them she doesn't want to take a chance on them and i know she'll enjoy them if

she watches them but it's just yeah i can never convince her to just be like, hey, just give it a shot. I'm sure you'll like it. She would rather watch some fucking shitty Netflix movie that came out this year, you know what I mean? So it's like, what can I say to kind of convince her to just take a chance on a movie that

I know she's going to like? Anyway, yeah. Is it that she won't sit through it starts slow thanks buddy or is it that she just doesn't want to yeah that's what i want to do the latter then like you just gotta talk to him but like hey can you just please try this yeah yeah you you will like it but i feel like most movies that are really great they usually start pretty slow because you i feel like well i don't know if that that's trying to think of the movies he's mentioning i don't think those they don't do well fight club is very boring well i don't know if that that's trying to think of the movies he's mentioning i don't think those they don't well fight club is very boring i i don't like fight

club but beginning i think so maybe people don't i guess yeah fiction isn't it no public is not boring to me it might but you know what dude to somebody who's like into tiktok and shit yeah sure well there is the whole conversation that whole scene it's like that scene is long and you're like what is this turn this off until everybody makes me mad that someone would do that but they would 100% they would yeah i mean people turn shit off in one minute so yeah you know yeah um so have you heard of the millennial pause you know about this do you know about this chris what is it the millennial pause no so millennials are now obviously like a little bit

older than like gen z and shit right and i think i'm a millennial technically i think you might be 1980 is the last year yeah uh and so i definitely am yeah and millennials do something where when they're taking a video of themselves to post online, they take like a beat or a breath right after they hit record. So they'll hit record and then they'll go, hey guys, that little thing is something that Generation Z and Zennials say is like an annoying thing millennials do because it's like just get to the video whoa yeah dude really yeah if you look it up it's there's a millennial pause and put it on the thing yes i don't know if i don't know if anthony can because he can't do that he'll click on fucking yeah it all multis falcon right p-a-w-s he writes oh look there's even a wikipedia thing he writes p-a-w-s

sure okay or just go to the wiki go to the wikipedia page yeah um the millennial pause zoom in is speaking the millennial pause is a pause in speaking that is present at the start of some recorded videos especially on short film video app tiktok the practice of including such a pause is generally ascribed to millennials a group often that's funny defined to include people born in the 80s and 90s the phenomenon is example of the digital generation gap between millennials and younger generations so yeah now so i started with taylor swift someone pointed out but that taylor swift does it that's funny that's funny and she's obviously young but she's still a millennial so like we're considered well we including we yeah and we is taylor swift which is insane but we me you and taylor swift three of us are all millennials yeah and we all probably do the

millennial pause and that makes younger people mad because they have to make sure that that is working that's hilarious it's half a second i know yeah dude apparently does it make them mad i was reading a whole thing about it dude like generation z is like oh i'll just keep swiping if they don't start right away yeah they're not talking right away i'm not watching it's like oh i'm sorry oh i'm sorry is your time so precious such an old guy you know i'm sorry you're a fucking 14 year old you got a whole bunch of stuff to do you got a whole lot of fucking videos to fucking click on the fucking fuck cares what you gotta do in your fucking shit ass life i'm gonna pause for as long as I fucking want. In the line of fire. In the TikTok of fire. Dude, in the line of TikTok.

Why is... I mean, how fucking precious is your time? John Malkovich, dude. Fucking relax. Who gives a shit? They took a fucking breath. Taylor Swift took a fucking breath before video. Line her up.

Shoot her. John Malkovich. Took a fucking breath before video. Line her up. Shoot her. John Markovich. Dude, why do people not say that... Shit, who's that guy in... Pull up the cast of Dope Sick. Peter Sarsgaard? Is that his name? No.

Is that him? He's a guy who I love, yeah. Michael Stuhlbarg? Peter... That guy right there. Stuhlbarg? No that guy right there stillbarg no right there stars guard yeah what about him why do you say peter stillguard michael stillbarg is right next to him no peter stars guard that's the guy you like who i like him right there's guard that man you brought him up though what about him yeah that's cool that's it no i'm kidding so so hold on. So Peter Sarsgaard, why don't people say, why don't a resounding amount,

why don't people say unanimously that he is John Malkovich? Yeah, I know what you're going to say. And John Malkovich is not John Malkovich anymore because he's too old, and now Peter Sarsgaard is John Malkovich. He's a little, I'll tell you why. He's a little more sensitive in the roles he did. He's less, yeah, I agree.

He's less weird. More like less aggro explosive you're right you're right peter sarsgaard's fucking amazing though you think i love him yeah i wouldn't say otherwise i just why he's not in a lot of shit that you know not he's in a lot of weird shit like random shit him peter sarsgaard the only person we're talking about right no no you are kind of a little bit talking about john mackervich i'm not. The only person we're talking about. Well, we're talking about John Malkovich, right? No, no. You are kind of a little bit talking about John Malkovich. I'm not mentioning him at all. We're only talking about Peter Sarsgaard right now.

You know I'm that good of an actor, right? As who? I think you can see Peter Sarsgaard's cock in Kinsey. That's correct. That is correct. And I can act like that too. Seen it. I would be in a movie where it shows my cock.

I was in a movie where it shows my cock. I'm not ashamed. Now, don't break the internet, but American Animal happens to be streaming on Paramount+. It does? Don't all go over there and flood the website and ruin it for everybody trying to watch the new Beavis and Butthead movie

and all the other shows that shoot in Montana. Now they're going to watch the Beavis and Butthead thing. What is that show that everybody loves? Yellowstone. Yellowstone. People want to watch that too? Is your cock blurred out on Paramount+. What's that?

Is your cock blurred out? Probably it is. You think so probably yeah yeah i don't know hey find out american animal on paramount plus it's a great movie yeah watch it i'm not directed he's in it and his videos letting us know if matt's cock is blurred and his babak is in it thank you yeah my babadook is in it so uh but yeah also uh kevin bacon's dick is in Wild Things for no reason. It's the rest of the show. How do you feel about that? Whose dick is in what? Bruce Willis' dick is in Night of Color, Color of Night.

Color of Night. The NC-17 version only. Theatrical cut. Theatrical cut. His dick was cut out of it, if you know what I mean. Yeah, they call that the the uh circumcising circumcision yeah color of night was circumcised uh so that movie got panned right color of night yeah yeah dude it's a notorious is it really bad though i like it i saw

it oh okay man you literally just said ask me how it was. I started answering and before I even got a word out, you said I saw it. That's the kind of stuff I do. Yeah, well, it sucks. I didn't know. I don't remember if I liked it or not. It was a long time ago, okay? Do you remember what it's about?

Like the plot? Kind of. Not really. It's crazy cuckoo stuff. Oh, so that's why it got made. So what is it? Why did they show his dick? It's so weird.

So go ahead. It's a full-on sex thriller. Yeah. It's like all-on and they don't need sex thriller yeah it's like all about sex and neuroses and weird sex personality disorders jane march plays do you want me to say two people in it yeah i know that she plays a boy in his therapy group he's a therapist bruce willis is a therapist in it and the woman's seducing him outside of the office but isn't it the same person the whole time yeah and he's and he doesn't know even though jane march is like a very sexy beautiful woman so that's why and she's in bad makeup and a bad wig

the whole premise is therapy with like brad dorff and him and we're all supposed to pretend it's not a hot woman no everybody brad Brad Dorff, you know. Yeah, Brad Dorff is the man, dude. I don't know who that is. Pull him up. Brad Dorff. Dude, Brad Dorff

is in that scene that there's a clip of Congratulations where you're talking about Nicolas Cage being the best actor to the break of dawn, baby. Yeah, he's in that?

You know when he pushes the money on him and stuff like that? He's great. He is great. Yeah, see? That guy's amazing. Yeah, I knew that was him.

Great guy. Chucky. His daughter is also an actress and she's amazing yeah yeah i knew that was a great guy chucky his daughter is also an actress and she's also great she looks just like him it's crazy really yeah yeah man what you gonna do oh what you're gonna do see there you go wow twinsies dude wow how much is brad dorff some guy that would stop you on the street once to ask you for directions oh yeah i mean i I mean, I wish he was. That was the fucking guy from. I love Brad Dorff. Really?

God. Yeah. All right. Well, okay. Let's do another one before we get out of here. So it's your. Hey, what's up, Matt and Chris? Got a question for Chris here.

Yo, man, when you're training, working out, I don't know if you've ever measured your body parts, your legs, your arms, you know, to do, you know, see how you've been growing. I've measured my arms and one arm is like three quarters of an inch smaller

than the other arm is. Okay. What would you do for that? Do you just curl more with the one arm? Yeah. Do you just hope people don't notice? Hit me up with that question. Well, people probably don't notice. Yeah.

My fiance and I, we're going to be checking you out in Ottawa. We actually bought tickets. Hell yeah. Still got to sell it out, though, but we'll be there. See you guys. See you, Chris. So Dick, you're not saying I can't sell it out. Peace.

Ottawa's the one I'm not selling. I was sold out in Edmonton. Wait, edmonton calgary and montreal oh no and hamilton oh no not edmonton yet why the fuck am i not sold out in ottawa go figure dude i'll be there soon but yo uh or wait no i'll probably already have done it at this point with this out but anyway i mean losing millions on your phone money yeah, I lost a lot of money. Yeah, but it's all good. So. I mean, it wasn't for me. Yeah, but also it's very, very obvious.

Just do an extra set or a few reps on the other one. It's too hard. Oh, no one's going to notice. No one notices. What is this guy talking about noticing? No one notices anybody anywhere ever. I know. In all the time.

I didn't even notice you sent in a video i didn't notice anything was going on are we doing a podcast right now i didn't even notice i'm awake yet today i didn't even notice that um i think yeah just do a few extra reps obviously that's so obvious so it's all good that's just the most obvious thing in the world yeah um what do we do to get your muscles bigger is basically yeah well how do i get one muscle to be as big as another work the smaller one out more john malkovich okay work the smaller one out more yeah dude okay that's it dude get trainer. Figure that shit out. You know?

Just lift more weights with that one. I can't say it so many different times. Yay, figured it out. Yay. Okay, that's the end of the show. When does this one air, though? For real? Not this Sunday, but the next. That is... Sunday the 24th.

Okay, so then I will be in yeah i will have already done all the canadian dates so pittsburgh cleveland detroit orlando richmond baltimore fort myers philadelphia reading pennsylvania go go to uh chrisley.com get your tickets and sign up for page of lifeline luxury that's patreon.comash Lifeline Luxury Where that show Is just us Bullshit And it doesn't have to do with We don't take submissions But it's very fun

Go check it out Don't Don't sleep on that We already have a bunch Of episodes there You can go watch them all If you got a question Go to the link

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