Lifeline - 90. Off The Deep End

Episode Date: December 31, 2023

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Oh, it's episode 90. And guess what? It is December 31st. And guess what that is? It is New Year's Eve. New Year's... Oh, yeah. All right.

A drunk elephant. Welcome to Lifeline. Lifeline is the last episode of the year 2023. Tomorrow, if you're watching this on the day of its release, is the beginning of the year 2024. And guess what you should do in that year? Get tickets to my tour. The very first thing, not that. The very first thing you should do,

if you haven't already, if you have done this already, you're the greatest person in the world. If you haven't done it, you can still be the greatest person in the world by going to do it now. Patreon.com slash Lifeline Luxury. Sign up for Lifeline Luxury.

It is the second greatest show on earth after this show, which is Lifeline. But also, I'm on tour. New material, not from grow or die a different different stuff doing all new stuff can't bring myself to do the old stuff i get bored with it whatever hey uh brea california anyway i'll be there i'll be in sacramento i will be in phoenix i will be in el paso albuquerbuquerque, Kelowna, B.C., Vancouver, so many places, Kitchener, Rochester, New York, Houston, Texas. Go to chrisley.com. There's a lot of dates out there.

Norfolk, Virginia, Durham, Corpus Christi, Houston, yeah. All right. So that's that. And also, if you want to send in a video here, click the link below and also send a thing for Matt, Private Record, privaterecord.com. Got the podcast, the Private Record solo podcast coming out real soon. All right. You're going to love it. Go follow it on Instagram and TikTok, YouTube.

Tippy top, tippy top shape. Tippy top, tip, tip, tip, bing, bong, bong. And so the one-on-one advice sessions with Matt at mattdelay.com and the merch at lifelinemerch.com. So, look, we did the holidays, and here we go. We have another one. I've talked about this on my, I think on my podcast, congratulations,

but all the holidays are smashed together. And I don't like that. Jesus shouldn't have been born so close to New Year's Eve. You mean Horace? You mean Horace? Jesus should have had the presence of mind to be born right after the pilgrims and Indians broke bread. You mean Horace?

And right before the new year you mean horus horus grant no no not way later horus grant was the egyptian god that was uh died on december 22nd and ran rose back from the dead on december 25th and there were three kings with him and he had 12 followers and disciples and And it is the story, basically, of Jesus. It only happened 3,000 years before Jesus. Hi. Well, yeah, but the Epic of Gilgamesh, I mean, every one of those stories is the same. I know.

There's the flood. I know. You know, it's the baby. And Horus was the first documented one. Immaculate birth. I understand it. From a virgin. He was born from a virgin.

Resurrection. Horus was born from a virgin. Hey, would you look at that? They're also similar. I'm just saying. All the Abrahamic religions and also all the religions before that. And we're entering

the age of Aquarius. Horus Christ. I mean, stop saying Horus Christ. Horus Christ. That's a good one. And we are entering the age of Aquarius and we are doing that

in 2200. And once that happens, we will have a new deity to worship and that's what will absolutely happen. I've seen way too many conspiracy theory documentaries.

Wow, dude. You are just off the deep end. Stop. I won't. Watch different stuff. But that's what will absolutely happen i've seen way too many conspiracy theory wow dude you are just i am off the deep end stop i won't watch different stuff that's actually true read i do read this is what i get the information from but read like a book not some i've read the client absolute i bat shit insane website that no one's ever heard of it's not a website dude what i'm saying is when the age of aquarius comes well i'm starting to sound like a crazy what does that even mean dude you're like you're like in the age of pisces see you dude and see you the most see ya ever okay moses died then jesus happened and after j, there's going to be a new deity. Worst history lesson of all time.

Okay. Stop saying Horus Christ. Horus Christ. Horus T. Christ. Horus. Horus Tyrone Christ. You better call Tyrone Horus Christ. Are you saying Horus?

Horus. Horus, like H-O-R-U-S, though, not Horus. H-O-R-A-S-E. Oh, got it, got it. No, not Horace. I'm saying it so he'll understand what I'm saying. But it's Horace is the H-O-R-U-S, Horace. I don't know how to spell it,

but it's the guy with the fucking eagle head and he's Egyptian, dude. Yeah, Horace Grant who played for the Bulls in the 90s. No, dude. That's the same guy, dude. Teammates with Harold Miner. No, it's not him. Okay.

Harold Miner won the Dunn contest and he was absolutely fucking awesome. He was on the Miami Heat though, not the Chicago Bulls. not him. Okay. Harold Minor won the dunk contest and he was absolutely fucking awesome. He was on the Miami Heat though, not the Chicago Bulls. I know. Horace Grant was on

the Chicago Bulls with Michael Jordan and Scotty Pippen. All right. Scotty Pippen. Was Horace Grant the one with the face mask? Yeah, dude.

He was the man. Like it's a horror movie. Why did they wear that shit? Why did basketball players wear that plastic thing? I don't know why he did it. I think it's, oh, it's because

they have vision problems. No, their nose. Oh, you're talking about the nose it's when they have a nose thing no Horace Grant had this just goggles oh you're right yes I'm talking about

not that that is right I got it mixed up but what is the thing with the glass on their face to protect a nose that was broken recently

or something like that wow yeah that is crazy because it's really sensitive cartilage you can bang it again no I understand

but just don't play right oh if you understand then don't ask no you have to play can bang it again. No, I understand, but just don't play, right? Oh, if you understand, then don't ask. No, you have to play, dude. No, I understand after you told me. Oh, okay, yeah. But don't. But you have to play because if you're the man and your team needs you, you can't be like, oh, my face is going to maybe,

you've got to put the mask on and suit up. Suit up. Got to get Z'd up from the feet up. Suit up. Okay? All right. Well, Horace Grant was a good basketball player, but he got forgotten because of Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen,

and that's okay. Dude, how about Scottie Pippen and Michael Jordan in like a loggerhead situation? You know Michael Jordan's son? Yeah. You know about this? Yeah, I do. Do we talk about this on the show?

No, we did not talk about it on the show, but I'm up on current events. Michael Jordan's son is either engaged to or dating or maybe even married to Scottie Pippen's ex-wife. Scottie Pippen, Pippen, Booyah, Booyah, and Booyah. Oh, you didn't know this? No. See?

Yeah, and even Michael Jordan's like, nah, that ain't cool. Isn't that weird? Even Michael Jordan's like, don't do that. Who's his son? Michael B. Jordan. Yeah, Michael B. Jordan. Michael Basketball Jordan. It's whatever, somebody Jordan. It's whatever.

Somebody Jordan. Let me see. Yeah. And he's younger, obviously. And Scottie Pippen. He's really, really, really handsome. Is he? Obviously.

Michael Jordan is so handsome. Michael Jordan's fine looking. Dude, I think Michael Jordan is so handsome. Really? Yeah. Oh. I mean, I would never say he's not a fine looking guy. I think Michael Jordan is absolutely one of the best looking like major

uh athletes of all time that's crazy scotty pippen's son no no michael jordan's son the only person we said is dating or maybe even married to scotty pippen's ex-wife yes they're they're they're intimate together don't stop even say dating or married just pick one you know lana what's her name he had it up and then he ruined it oh wow michael jordan's son is good looking marcus jordan and larsa pippen 25 years after michael jordan and scotty pippen won their eighth michael's son marcus and scotty's ex-wife laura have a wedding yeah dude they have a wedding in the works. And apparently Michael Jordan is like not in,

they're like Tim's, he asked him or whatever and he's just like, that's fucked up. Man, I just say that's fucked up, but you know what I mean? Look how handsome his son is. Yeah, he's a good looking dude, huh?

And Larsa Pippin looks more like Mr. Potato Head. She's pretty much low Kim in white makeup, but I- Look at all the random parts that were assembled on her face. Yeah.

That nose is created, manufactured. She must be bad though. She must be bad in real life. The lips look like they're just injected with every possible thing you can inject. But she must be bad. Look how fucking sick-ass

Michael Jordan's son is, though. So, all right. So there you go. That's wild. Yeah, Michael Jordan's good-looking. Come on, look at Michael Jordan. He's so handsome. Yeah, but to say he's one of the best-looking

major league... Major athletes. No, that's crazy. Name Come on, look at Michael Jordan. He's so handsome. Yeah, but to say he's one of the best looking major league. Major athletes. No, that's crazy. Name two that are more handsome than him. Seriously? Yeah, go ahead. Well, first of all, there's so many baseball ones. So name one.

There's many, many, many football ones. Name two that are more handsome than Michael Jordan. I know it's subjective, but. Yeah, obviously Tom Brady. I mean, I don't agree, but i totally get why steve young steve uh uh oh what's his name from uh the guy who has 900 kids from um now obviously he's hot because he's been banging and ringing um the the tyro what's his name tyro tyro owen what sport oh that guy's major handsome.

No, come on. Oh, come on, bro. You know who's really handsome, was really handsome? A lot of quarterbacks were handsome, right? Yeah. Joe Montana. I mean, sure. Joe Namath was handsome.

Joe Namath was handsome, yeah. Yeah. Joe Montana's okay. Yeah, no, Michael Jordan's more handsome than Joe Montana. He's like a Michael Jordan to me. They're both the same equal. Michael Jordan's mad handsome, dude. Did you guys say Tom say tom brady already yeah we did that was the first one we said um uh uh who's the running back uh barry sanders is really good looking more than michael

i don't know i mean he's well he didn't look so good there oh no you know what i'm not i'm not talking about barry sanders i'm talking about um the one in the other one emmett smith emmett smith yeah he that's who i met yeah yeah but my friend's more he's he's very who tony siragusa tony larusa tony larusa dude um uh dennis eckersley was really good looking get the fuck out of here i mean tony larusa you know no yeah a lot of dennis eckersley look up dennis eckersley dennis eckersley e-C-K-E-R-S-L-E. There you go. Come on.

That guy was good looking. That's a good looking dude. He had a vibe, but he wasn't. Yeah, I guess. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The Eck was hot, dude. The Eck.

Steve Sachs was really hot. Was he? Yes. Todd Zeal. He was the hottest. Todd Zeal was the hottest, he says. Kind of whatever. What's his name?

Steve Sachs? S-A-X. His name is almost sex. Like sex, but with an a uh and then it goes say i go young well it'll come up he's a good looking old guy yeah here we go oh let's see let's see let's see the bat one that one that one oh sure yeah but not on the left though not on the left you're right but right there yeah so there you go dude i mean there's many many more to say michael jordan that's you're only saying that because he's a star people act like you know what you're a hoe people act like derrick jeter is like dude he's so ugly derrick jeter is a very good looking guy what it's his eyes

no cap you're out of your no cap that that's crazy dude derrick jeter's good looking dude you're crazy you've never been honestly you have never been more wrong that's crazy dude derek jeter he he he's he's good he's got the sauce you think he's better looking than michael jordan i do yeah when he was young my mind is shattered dude you talk about young yeah it doesn't matter anytime he was never better looking than michael jordan what about this uh pete sampras andre agassi okay well you're talking tennis tennis is like the hottest guy i mean look at derrick jeter's wife dude nadal federer sampras look at his joker look at his ivan lendl what about hockey players dude hockey

you're forgetting dude you're crazy you're out of your element look at derrick jeter's wife bro i don't oh yeah i know derrick jeter's a hot wife? He's worth $800 million. I know, I know, I know. I get it, I get it, I get it. Fucking... Anyway, Michael Jordan is a fine-looking guy, but I would not say he's... We're talking about it too much,

but I would not say he's one of the best-looking athletes. No way. I love the way Michael Jordan looks. Okay, you know. Physically. Physically. A housewife. Physically, I love the way he looks.. Okay. You know. Physically. Physically. A housewife. Physically, I love the way he looks.

That's fine. That's the only way you're going to like someone looks. It's physically. I'm just stressing it. I like the way he looks emotionally. You can't say that. I just mean like, I don't mean like on the court when he's in motion. I'm talking about physically in still images.

I love the way Michael Jordan looks. Get it. All right. I get it. All right. I get it, my baby. Let's start. And on the heels of that, let's start with the advice Start And on the heels of that Let's start with the advice

Okay cool I guess let's start with the advice Hey Chris Hey Matt Hello Hi Try to make this fast So

I don't know what that means I'm such a goofy person When I'm by myself I love who I am When I'm by myself I make myself laugh And like I don't care Who I am

There you go And then all of a sudden when I get into groups of people even with my husband or whatever I like I get really quiet and shy and awkward but like I want to be a weirdo I want to be the weirdo that I am and I want to be who I am in front of people but I don't know how to start that with people that I already know because I can't be weird and quiet one day and then all of a sudden be weird and crazy so what is your advice for slowly taking steps to be who I am around the people that I've known forever overthinking it huh thank you I love you bye you're overthinking it not that it's not valid

totally yeah right yeah but you're just overthinking it and it's making it worse to overthink it is making it worse that's true of almost every single thing okay okay but not but not everybody overthinks things and i'm saying this is she is what she's doing over what i'm saying is overthinking things almost always makes things worse right gotcha okay cool so so that's the way we should have said it right but you didn't say it like that exactly what i said anyone who has questions about it can rewind and see exactly what I said, which is exactly that. So yeah, I actually totally get it.

Not in the way of like, I want to be my true self and it's weird, but like I've had the experience of being like, I've changed or I believe I've changed and people who know me know a version of me that they insist on being the case and I feel like I've grown in a different way than like they see me because they've known me and that when you know someone,

you come to expect behavior from them and it can be hard to be the way you want to be and be seen as such versus their ongoing expectation of what they've always thought you'd be. So I can relate in that sense. But the truth is, it doesn't matter. Ins and outs, specifics, nuance don't really matter. All that matters is you have to act the way

that feels natural to you and right to you regardless of what people's expectation of you are, even if it's very, very, very different. That's it. There's no other like, you could go on and on about it and talk about your specific case. It doesn't matter.

Like the only way to solve this scenario or issue problem is to act the way you feel is most aligned with the way you are and the way you want to be. Even if people are like, oh, that's really different at first. They'll get used to it. If they're really different at first they'll get used to it if they're really your friend they'll get used to it i think she's expressing some sort of

uncomfortability though is what when she's doing it it feels inauthentic even though it's authentic because she's around people and it gets and she gets all bunched up about it which i do understand but i would say that which would be another symptom of overthinking it right yeah but i would yeah i would say that also with age it it gets a little easier i don't know how old she is but you know i think that like because i was like that in my 20s um also putting yourself in situations where that's hard for you makes it easier you know it's like when i do stand up and i would bomb i'd get better because i would just be like oh this is what bombing is who gives a fuck and then fuck? And then you end up going on stage,

and you figure it out. And they don't sniff that fear from you, so you're you, unapologetically. You know what I'm saying? I do. I don't know if it applies to her, but I do know what you're saying. Well, yeah, I don't know.

I have something that halfway applies as well, too. Dude, I remember the day I became no longer shy. What? I distinctly remember the day it happened. I was the crossing guard at my elementary school. I was in fourth grade. And the crossing guard who I saw every day, he'd walk me across the street

when I would go to walk home from school. He knew me and he knew me as would go to walk home from school. He knew me, and he knew me as like a really quiet, shy kid. And I had this friend who was the opposite of that. And I think it was the reason I was drawn to him. He was so unabashedly himself all the time. He was a really wild kid and funny kid, I thought at the time.

And when this crossing guard would see us together, I assumed he thought we were both like that, in reality it was just my friend this day i was alone and i remember thinking i'm gonna act the way i feel is more aligned with who i really am in front of this guy because there's no stakes i don't care what this guy thinks but i was shy to everyone in the world including this guy so i was gonna test it out on this guy wow and i started being like you know we're doing i don't even remember what i was i remember i started i took a penis i started peeing all over the road and on him and i was like being silly and goofy and i go it's just me i realized like there are no consequences it's totally fine to either be shy or super outgoing and silly and goofy. And honestly, from that day on,

I was no longer a naturally shy kid. Whoa, how old were you? I was in fourth grade. I don't know, that's 10 or 11. What? Yeah. Isn't that weird? That's crazy.

I remember I used to be shy. I see it in Calvin now. You know, Billy's only eight months old, so I don't really see it. But I see Calvin being shy, and it's interesting. Well, here's the thing. I know i was cripplingly shy so i i know i was wary of that so i was on the lookout for it so when he started talking to people i would make sure that i was with him and i'd say it's okay why don't you say hi to that person and tell him and when somebody says what's your name i say tell them your name i don't say it you know it's

okay tell him and and now he's you know i don't know if you could say a four-year-old i don't know if he's outgoing or not for a four-year-old but he'll go up and he'll be like you know he's less shy than i was oh that's good and and and you know part of it is because probably he has some of kristin in him but like a lot of it is, I think, because I led with me knowing how I was and how it was hard for me as a kid and how scared I was because I was always scared of everything. And I don't wish that on him. You're a huge pussy.

No, it's true that you're a gigantro pussy. So I wouldn't say gigantro. You're a gigantro little wussy baby boy. Okay. Okay. Gigantro P-U-S-S-Y is very disrespectful, and I will tell you this. It has the adverse effect of what you think it does

because a gigantro P-U-S-S-Y means it's not an effective P-U-S-S-Y because a lot of people would like the tighter ones. So what you're saying is I'm not. Yeah, but now you're getting off point here. What you're saying is I'm an ineffective P-U-S-S-Y, which means I'm brave. So thank you're saying is I'm not, yeah, but that's, now you're getting off point here. What you're saying is I'm an ineffective P-U-S-S-Y, which means I'm brave. So thank you very much.

Got out of that one. Yes, got out of that one. So dumb. I've thought about this and getting out of that one bothers me so much. When you say got out of that one bothers me so much.

You laugh at it. So how do you feel about that? You laugh at it. So it doesn't bother you deep down. So let's talk about it. How does it make you feel? It pierces your armor. I absolutely detest it.

But then why do you laugh at it? Yes, got out of that one. You, no. It says more about you and who you are than anything else imaginable. Yes. What does? Crushed you on that one. What does?

The fact that you say got out of that one when you're not even in one. Okay? I was in one. You weren't in one. You're never in one. When you say got out of that one, you're never in one. You're just like, we're just talking. What would be in one? got out of that one you're never in one you're just like we're just talking in one like in a real bind and you're cornered and like that's not what a conversation is i got out of the predicament using using vocabulary is my point using uh

gymnastics using linguistic gymnastics i was able to you know what I mean? The part where Catherine Zeta-Jones is doing the thing in Entrapment where she's trying to get through the laser beams, that's me. God, it's so weird that that is the enduring image from that movie. And every time I bring up Entrapment, that's what you say.

It's just because I can't believe it though. Also, why did you bring up Entrapment so often? Well, that's the real question. It was a movie. It was honestly, before that life was good and then entrapment came out and things really went to shit.

But I will say. It entrapped you. But I will say that movie, the reason why that happened was because that was pretty sultry. I know, but it's weird that that, it's so weird to me, the things that become touchstone,

like enduring images of things. What else is one? Can we think of one? Yeah, I mean, this was on my mind earlier today. So I don't know if everybody knows it, but The Exorcist, the image of Max von Sydow

outside the apartment and near the light post. That was the poster. Yeah, it was a poster. Got out of that one. See what I mean? Got Hollywood out of that one you didn't you weren't in one hollywood was in one hollywood was in a predicament when you said that

so uh yeah but that was the poster yeah i guess it was i don't know if it was the poster the poster of entrapment was her just it might as well be yeah yeah that is weird how that stuff sticks in our minds but maybe it's just us if we say entrapment to someone else, first of all, most people would be like, what the fuck is entrapment? Of course. It'd be like a movie. And they'd be like, oh yeah, that one with Sean Connery. They might not even know Catherine Zeta-Jones is in it.

You know what? Let's Google images and see when the butt comes up. Okay. Scroll. It's going to be. No, don't put poster. The posters doesn't. Yeah, no poster.

Don't fuck it up like that. Movie. Just do movie. You got to put movie. You got to do movie. You don't have to do movie. I mean. There it is.

It's first page. It's right there. Was it really? It's in the middle. Yeah really it's in the middle it's yeah it's in the middle and then he keeps fucking it up oh there it is yeah yeah there it is the very first non-poster image was that's so weird what is it look how many people have watched that well 2.16 million views and we get it we understand why it's not because of the plot it's because of herrarius maximus yeah uh isn't that weird that's so much in all the press photos how much did sean connery smell so bad and knew it and made katherine zeta jones deal with it and was just like put the chairs closer he's saying dude and also how about when he said he would hit women and he was like yeah so what so what? So today he said,

yeah, I still think that. So dark, you know, like the darkness in that, in his memory, in his mind, what's flashing are like some of the darkest moments ever, you know,

when they're talking about that. I don't understand how, and that came out, that they were like trying to say shit about him when he was still alive and it just kind of went away. What do you mean say shit about him when he was still alive and it just kind of went away what do you mean say shit about him you know how the people they'll be like oh you're canceled because of this or whatever yeah but it was people there's no like rhyme or

reason or or uh uniformity to that working like people try to do that shit with many many people that doesn't work you know true i guess you're right it's just like some trains just keep rolling and yeah you're right you know it's just i wonder if it affected sean connor at all you know? True. I guess you're right. It's just like some trains just keep rolling and, you know, it's just, I wonder if it affected Sean Connery at all, you know? No, no, dude. He's an outrageous dickhead.

Is he? Yeah. Well, obviously he said that, you know? Yeah. Well, yeah,

I don't even mean that. Do you know other dickhead stories with him? there are crazy stories with him being just a gigantro dick. You can't, no, you know what's weird is I know guys that, like stars that like are like that That you know

They're not my friends But I know people That are dicks And people think That they're great And they don't know The real them And they're such

Fucking assholes Yeah And it's crazy That these people Are not like Get passes Or don't get exposed And some people do

And then some You know what I mean It's like odd. It's completely crazy. It's so odd. The idolatry of public figures in general is stupid because the chances of someone who's really, really famous and really, really, especially really, really powerful

being a good person are crazy low. That's the thing that I don't understand about how, like then they do this. And they're the most put on a pedestal and beloved by people who have no idea about them well that's the thing i don't get about like ellen or like it's like oh you remember when it was the comment that she's a big dick and like yeah yeah she's not gonna do the show anymore i don't know she doesn't show anymore but like but like oh your boss is a dick yeah oh your boss is

a dick the ellen one was weird to me because it was like she's just a mean boss a boss everyone is a mean boss yeah poll the public i would i would guess who likes their boss 60 to 70 percent of people think their boss is a dick yeah yeah and then but guess what guess what most of the time their bosses don't even know they're being a dick they're just a boss and they're like oh fuck really i didn't know that fuck you yeah but even that's immaterial because they're being a dick and like the person under them thinks so yeah it's just true across the board it's so weird that was a really weird that was a weird one but there were other ones too everyone was like she's such a monster who was the one who did the directed the who was the guy that directed the... He did some superhero movie.

Oh, James Gunn. No, not him. That was just for some jokes he did on Twitter, which was stupid. Bryan Singer? No, no. Let's be real about James Gunn, though. He made too many jokes like that, but go on. Yeah, okay.

But still, he was trying to be funny, whether or not they were not funny. It was very obvious that it was a joke. Yeah, no, it was... Was it... It wasn't Whedon, was it? Oh, Joss Whedon. Yeah, yeah, yeah was, was it the, it wasn't Whedon, was it? Joss Whedon. Oh, Joss Whedon. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dude, the thing on him, I was reading it. I'm like, nobody's even saying anything specific. They were just like, yeah, he made me feel bad. I didn't read anything about him because I don't care about him. But everyone does. So, yeah, everyone cares about him. Go up, go up, go up, go up. Accused of misogyny i i read it and i was like i mean i i guess look i

maybe i didn't read the whole thing i don't remember but i remember being like what is this what's oh yeah he's mean somebody said he's mean oh i remember this everybody was like he's a huge dick and everybody came out with stories about it yeah i mean well look here's the thing i don't know if you're a huge here's ultimately if you're a huge dick to everyone you encounter you should expect there to be a lot of people eventually

it might start to trickle out slowly at first but eventually everyone's gonna be like that guy's a huge dick and it'll kind of course correct itself so

I get it that like people want to let the world know that their heroes are dicks that's fine with me though anyway I just hope that they reboot buffy yeah well that's what the conversation is all about okay let's do another one uh all right yeah yeah we are way too long hi chris and matt my name is emily i'm a huge fan chris i've seen you in new hampshire and boston

and matt we had a private session because my mom was dating a q and honor oh yeah you're happening so thank you oh uh so my issue i am 33 i've been single for a long time and would like to get back into dating um after having done a lot of work on myself i am now over a year and a half sober from alcohol and my struggle is that I don't know if there's a right time to tell a guy about my sobriety. And if there's a way to frame it where it's not automatically seen as a red flag. I've been rejected a lot. I understand why a lot of people would have addiction and alcoholism as a deal breaker.

But it would be nice if I was given a shot. Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated thank you well it's up to you to help the stigma though i mean like you can be an addict and still you know there should be no you you have to you have to get to a point where there's no shame in it you know is she's i'm sorry just for clarity is she saying she'll tell people that she's sober and though people will hold that against her well i think i'm not i'm actually that sounded like i was being a wise ass no there are people who are like that and obviously the answer to that is you don't need those people in your life yeah those people suck

but i think to go beyond that she's talking about the shame she has where she feels like she has to bring it up and she doesn't want people to have a certain reaction to it. And when should she bring it up? And I think that it helps. Period. It helps things if you just drop the shame. You learn how to drop that. And just say, yeah, I'm sober.

To somebody. It doesn't matter. First, second date, whatever. Because it's just it comes up when it comes up. And if they don't want you in your life like because of that then they're doing you a favor i i i think that you know being an alcoholic and being an addict is is tough uh to navigate and you have to come to grips with the fact that you're okay you you're a year and a half sober that's amazing that's that's actually a lot of time under your belt you know i mean you're you're you know yeah

there's people who are sober for 20 years but you know it's uh it's a you're doing a good job and you should be proud of it yeah 100 exactly not not oh what's this person going to think uh and and and furthermore it's so many people are addicts man like the people you tell this to they don't even know they're addicts in some way or another and they're just saying you know but i i get it i get the shame but like you you you should just you need to work out get to a place where it doesn't bother you because i know as an addict that when you let the shame take you over, it just spirals you into more of an addict, you know, of addict behavior. Right.

So, yeah. So work on it to where you're okay with yourself and fuck them, dude. I mean, people, yeah. But also about when to bring it up, I don't think you, I think this is kind of a version of what you're saying, but like you don't, there's no right or wrong time. Bring it up when it comes up.

The first time you guys are in a place where he might be ordering a drink and you don't, explain it then. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't mean explain it, like defend it. I mean just say it. Yeah, I don't drink. Oh, why?

Oh, I'm sober. I mean maybe I feel a certain way about it because there's so many sober people in LA. Maybe it's different in other places in the country. Yeah, true. It is. That there's more of a stigma. But here, dude, it's so not stigma-tested.

Yeah, no, not at all. At all. But also, you also don't have to make it this thing where like, hello, I'm sober, this and that. That's what I mean, yeah. You can just be like, oh, yeah, I haven't drank for a year and a half. I't do that shit anymore it's fucked my life right right you know i'm saying yeah who wouldn't understand that yeah who's got a thing about oh you don't

here's the thing you want to make the focus about it i don't drink because i'm a better person and healthier and wiser and it's better for my life because i don't not when i drink i get all fucked up yeah and it's this illness that i have like no no you don't drink because it's a better decision for you not to drink that's a thing that everyone should be seeking in a potential partner they've weeded things out of their life that make their life worse you have a good think of it as like a badge of honor not a badge well it is yeah it is about that's what i'm saying it is a badge badger yeah period yeah that's it um think of it that way and when it does come up be proud to talk about it i yeah if they don't like it for sure fuck them well yeah do you want that person yeah yeah yeah even if you're not

sober and you're with somebody that thinks that you don't want to be with them that's a weird way to think i think i think yeah i agree i couldn't that's too solidified i do have a question for um mako actually and he just went to the bathroom but he's coming back Mako you gave me an accessory to charge my iPhone you gave me this which is so

big right can we agree Lifeline viewers that this power pack is it's not just big it's heavy literally it's match face it has a lot of charges on it it's got a lot it's heavy literally it's match face okay now there we go leave that because it's got a lot of charges on it so that's great okay i plugged it into my iphone i got a charge i got a charge it was great i was doing well then i looked and down and it said accessory

has won't charge the device because it has too much power that's what it said your device has too much power anymore oh it said that oh it said that why would he why would he make that up well i don't know if it's going to do that again now because it's probably not going to do it again now okay so when it comes back i'll show you okay you're my witness okay so i'll keep it there okay can't wait for it to do it again being so loud it's no but it's fine i can't wait all right so let's do another one okay hey chris hey matt highest voice i saw you in salt lake city a month ago so yeah absolutely wonderful show thank you matt i saw a trailer for uh your movie and you

look like christian bale when you shave your head in your face so uh know that okay great i love you both i love the podcast keep me going through my days thanks bro so i got this thing where i'll work with heavy equipment and i'll be pinching my fingers and i get a blood blister and i'll cut it so that it doesn't stick on my skin looking all gross and weird and shit sure well i didn't know if it was weird because I'm self-harming, like an emo. I want to know your guys' thoughts on that. I love the podcast. Keep ripping.

Life ripping. Appreciate you guys. Take care. 65% of men who live in Salt Lake City look like that guy. Dude, how crazy is that? Look at him. He's got the Salt Lake City face. I mean, right there, he looks like Billy Bob Thornton in Sling Blade.

Yeah, I don't know. That's not self-harm you know of course not but i will say it's fucking funny shit why is it so fun what is what is he talking about he's saying he's got blisters and they they they bulb up oh yeah okay yeah and he pops them is that weird i thought he said he cut the cuts well yeah yeah i mean popping them is cool why are you cutting them well i think that that's you gotta you like heat the blade and then no is that what he does you should right you don't want to use some random blade it's dirty and shit yeah but i think what he means does he means he actually cuts it off i thought he no i think he cuts it open and and lets the juice which is popping it lets the juice squeeze out i mean this guy's semantics and which is popping it it's not popping it it's it's what do you call that

when you like lansing yeah yeah exactly yeah dude how about that i am a linguistics and i and the way i get out of shit is unbelievable i that technically wasn't a yes got out of that one up but but i would lance it off i would lance it off i boil up with fury when you say I got out of the water. Shakespeare. I feel my body welling up. Shakespeare. With hot. Oh, body. Hot volcanic. Oh, body of mine.

Boiling blood. Over the hills. I'm boiling. Yeah. I don't know. I don't think it's weird. I do it. And man, do I love it.

You love that? You drain it. That's how you weird. I do it. And man, do I love it. You love that? You drain it. That's how you lance and then drain it. I mean, get a thesaurus for fuck's sake. I didn't need one. I did it myself. But that's fine. But guess where my thesaurus is?

Guess where my thesaurus is? All right. Well, stop. Would you like to look? Try to check if we have pants on. What does that say? It says, cannot use accessory. This accessory uses too much power.

Oh. does that say it says cannot use accessory this accessory uses too much power so what's it mean my phone's fucked right here of course not that's fucked now though because you just broke it here sorry why is that 28 pounds and what what is that so what does that mean it doesn't mean nothing you know my accessory uses too much power or his accessory uses too much power who cares you're saying that? Your phone's charged. No, it's not completely charged. But it's enough. But what if it fucked it up and I got to get a new iPhone?

It didn't, dude. Just wipe it off and you'll never know. It's already gone. Wipe it off, you know? Okay. No, swipe it. All right.

Swipe it. I get it. Swipe it. Calvin would say, squipe. Squipe it off. He thinks it's scripe. Can you scripe it?

That's cool. It's so cute. All right. Yeah. I don't think it's weird to lance your shit off. He thinks it's scripe. Can you scripe it? That's cool. It's so cute. All right. Yeah. I don't think it's weird to land your shit off. It's not weird at all. Wait, I did one recently.

What'd I do? Oh, I had a, oh dude, it didn't come back. When was it coming back? I had a thing, all of a sudden, I was like rubbing my,

and it hurt so bad and it was like a skin tag. Oh yeah, it came back. Really? I think so. We don't talk about this. Why'd you bring it up then? Well, I didn't want to, no, I didn't want people to know. Oh, it came back. Really? I think so. We don't talk about this. Why'd you bring it up then?

Well, I didn't want to... No, I didn't want people to know. Oh, it's back. Yeah, I feel it. No, no, no. That's not it. That's not it. That's not it.

I had to... Dude. You know? Stop fucking doing that. I did it so many times before. I know. I was getting upset and then the last time,

it's like, I get it. I was just waiting for you to react. It was weird that you didn't react. Well, fucking don't be like that, dude. I caressed his it was weird don't be like that dude i caressed his neck fucking little brother ass motherfucker correct i caressed his neck it was weird though i know but you took so many times to say it was weird i thought it was interesting anyway i i took it off because when i was at the beach once no no the pool we were out of vacation as kids and oh it's a long time ago yeah it was just me and you we left mom and dad at home yeah no but we went to we're at the pool and i had i had this uh skin

tag that was here i had him all my life yeah and it was it was falling off and as it was falling off i was in the pool i just go i took it off oh whoa okay that's what's hanging on by a thread right and the next week it was back it grows It grows back. You know that, right? Right? So I got it removed. Sure. By a doctor. Yeah, yeah. Got it removed.

And so this one, way little older than this one, but all of a sudden, I'm like, oh, what the fuck? What is this? How can, you know what I'm saying? When you get older, some shit will just appear? Like crazy weird. Yeah. So it was hanging on by a thread.

So I twisted a little. It hurts so bad. Okay? That sounds painful. So I twisted a little. It hurts so bad. Okay. That sounds painful. Sounds gross too. Like someone stabbed me. So I'm like, all right, fuck it. So I get the, Kristen got me a nail clipper kit.

Oh, Jesus. What are you doing? Okay. Took the fucking sharpest lance. I go like this. Gone. No, it didn't hurt. Okay. just realized no it's not back it's not back it's not back oh what the frick how crazy is that it'll come back it'll come back it'll be i'll wake up one day and it'll be like in my dresser you know why though i feel stop me if we've talked about this already on the podcast

it's in your dna yeah to grow out of your body at a certain time in your life and then if you cut it off after it comes out yeah your body's still wired to have that so it'll be like wait no you need that your butt yeah your body goes exactly no no no yep um no yeah we did talk about that before on this podcast okay No, we did talk about that before on this podcast. Okay. So, I got three moles removed though. When?

A month ago. Dude, oh yeah, good. That's good. When I was little, I think again in fourth grade, a lot of fourth grade stuff coming up, I had a big mole removed from my back. Yeah. And it was big enough to need stitches i thought it was my our other brother but okay we know i thought we had three brothers but that was a mole oh now you get it job yeah okay out of that one and

and i started showing people at school and said, well, this is hilarious, actually. I don't think I've ever told you this. I said the scar was from my brother stabbed me in the back. Shakespeare. So fucking symbolic. How crazy is that? And people believed me. Why the fuck did nobody? The scar is like that big, you know?

What did I stab you with, a toothpick? Why did nobody say anything to me about it? They were scared of me. That's why. Yeah, they were like, go stab me. Oh, that must have been why people were scared of me mum's a word when they came around dude i was pretty much tony soprano dude pretty much yeah and then there was that other kid who said you were a drug dealer who i beat up after school a lot a lot of a lot of things said untrue

about me so but anyway let's do it and let's do another one yeah Yeah. Hi, guys. Chris, Matt. Called it before. Chris, you remember my kitchen. You said it looks dope. Come over. Anyways, I need help. I don't think I remember that. There's a good friend of mine. Her name is Tubi, not announced.

Anyways, she's really cool. Hi, I'm Tubi, not announced. And I don't want to stop being friends with her. However, she has sperm eyebrows. You know what those are? Mako, can you bring however she has sperm eyebrows you know those are mako can you bring a picture of sperm eyebrows i don't bring up stuff anymore but nope you don't look wrong fucking thing anyways whatever uh their eyebrow literally little ball and then chute tail like a sperm okay i'm not saying my eyebrows are the best but okay what do I do what do I tell her how do I be like

yo go get a microbladed yo let's see look up her sperm eyebrows that's not a thing she made that up well google sperm eyebrows thanks love you Chris I'm gonna see you Sacramento VIP hell yeah dude let's see can you google it

yeah you can google it what are you gonna type in Oh, yeah, dude. Let's see. Can you Google it? Yeah, you can Google it. He's going to fucking... What are you going to type in? You know, this isn't even going to be his fault. I don't think... There's no such thing as a sperm eyebrow. Oh, well, that one looks like it is. That one looks like sperm.

Oh. Oh, my God. That looks so much like sperm. What's that's her friend? Well, that's drawn on, right? Of course. I never really... Oh oh it really is a thing oh my god can you can you just go to like news or something yeah news about sperm eyebrows

can you just go to like not the pictures though i want to see if there's like links sperm eyebrows like buzzfeed did some sperm eyebrow updates.com can you go to links can you just go to all go to all my lord almighty dude why would the fuck would you not want images because i want to know if it's the story of sperm brows so now we know it's a thing dude this guy really doesn't get it huh early 2000s sperm brows making a comeback it look sperm brows it's a thing look listen it sounds like sperm brows are a thing that people do on purpose yeah that's what it does so why would you tell your friend that she has them she obviously knows she's doing them on purpose that's crazy this is a non thing

to call in about you you don't tell it's like you don't tell someone like hey do you know you just got a haircut yeah they know they got a haircut because they got the haircut hey hey uh you got sperm brows shit i know oh okay exactly movie exactly um but that's a stupid thing that it's a thing honestly that's a stupid thing because all eyebrows kind of look like sperm anyway that's a dumb thing that somebody made up they all kind of look like sperm wait what do you who which group of people are saying are dumb though i'm confused the people that? Anyone that made up that thinks sperm brows is a real thing. No, I totally get it. No, no, no, no, no.

I understand. But eyebrows are already so on their way to look like sperms that you can't be like, these eyebrows. It's not. It's like, you know. Yes, you can, though. Because, no, that's exactly why you can. Because they look like flat things that curve around your eye.

I guess. I'm not into it. But then when you shave all but the little ends, but they look like balls, it looks exactly like a sperm. I understand. But maybe also people are just born with it. Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's Maybelline.

Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's sperm eyebrows. Maybe it's sperm eyebrows. Yeah, dude. Exactly. sperm eyebrows maybe it's sperm eyebrows yeah dude exactly but i i don't i this is not this would be like hey my friend has the step haircut that was really popular in the 90s i get it i don't know how to tell him he has a step haircut and it's like you don't need to tell him he got the step haircut i know i got sperm brows done yeah hey dude you got a shirt on yeah yeah so next hi chris hi matt hi i'm big fan of the podcast my husband and i listen all the time so i'm currently four months pregnant yay at the end of may great and i have a friend college, which was many years ago now, who's

getting married in June. She's asked me to be a bridesmaid. And last time I talked to her, you know, she just wasn't totally understanding that I'm expecting to have a baby at the end of May. And it might be, it will be really difficult to be a bridesmaid and have a baby within the same month. As you know, due dates are not set in stone. So I could potentially have a one to two week old and she's just not totally understanding without me having to say that.

So looking for some advice on how to approach that conversation with her and tell her that it just doesn't feel possible to be able to do both. Any advice that you have would be greatly appreciated. Thanks. I got great advice. Your friend fucking sucks big

chunky assholes. Wow. First of all that street is really loud. Your fucking friend sucks. You need to move. It is so loud on that street is really loud outside fucking friend sucks you need to move it is so loud on that street how could your friend be so terrible as to not understand why you wouldn't want to be in their fucking wedding i got when you're literally gonna have a baby that day i got one word that's conjoined bridezilla okay next it's like i don't like to say this but bridezilla okay i don't like when you say it either yeah no i don't like bridezilla at all but uh in this case, it-

People are such fucks about their weddings, man. This is the problem about weddings. God damn it, dude. When women are like, this is my fucking day. No, it's not. It's everyone else's day too. You just happened to get married on that day. It's everyone else's day.

Fuck, dude. It's my day. I have to go. That is infuriating. It's my day too. That is upsetting. Yeah. Yeah, actually, there's nothing that would, yeah, you would particularly be really infuriated. that is upsetting yeah yeah that actually there's nothing

that would yet you would particularly be really yeah that's so something that would make me mad and it did so congrats yeah uh yeah just say no dude say no that's too much on your plate dude she no she said she did say no and her friend was like not understanding i understand but keep to the no is what i'm saying i mean i should fucking hope so right right i think she's more saying like why like what do i do about my friend not understanding yeah that's not cool you have a baby do on yeah what she like hold she's just like hold it in your pussy yeah what does she expect you to even what is the solution even i do she's up there like yeah yeah yeah water just dripping down her leg? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on. Knock is on there because she's having a baby. God, dude. Because that happens to me.

That is like peak selfishness. Think about it. Yeah, it is. That's crazy, dude. Peak selfishness. Peak selfishness because it's not even just about, it's about the lady. It's about also the baby.

You're ruining a bunch of stuff. So many stuffs. Imagine, you were born at my friend's wedding. I couldn't say no to. Sorry, dude. Yeah, I had to hold it because I had to make sure that, you know, I printed out her vows. Making her feel so bad and shit because of this, dude? Yeah.

Come on. Yeah. Yeah. That's true. It was loud, huh? I really... It was getting to me that you were doing that you know yeah i know but uh i think it's gonna lay it out there it was getting to me i think it was good in

fact i missed the first one and that's what pissed me off because here's the thing i saw the first one go by i was about to do it i was like i shouldn't do it and then i got upset i didn't do it so then i did every single car after that secrets and then when i was delighted when i saw cars go this way too i was like oh cool and then I saw one make a turn and I go. Delighted, you know? Yeah. Okay. It's the small wins in life, you know?

I agree with that, but that was a loss. It's the small wins in life and I won there. That was a net loss. It was a gross win. Because you're going to learn about loss. What's that? What is that from? It's a gross win.

I don't even know what it's from. It's from a movie. Oh, oh, you're going to learn about loss gonna learn about us from kate fear uh you're a dork um all right all right next one what's up matt what's up chris my hair if i got electrocuted this i will be six months sober oh um i had a very bad alcohol problem um And that led me to move home to get some help temporarily. So I'm staying with my parents. Good for you, man. And through the time at home, I've noticed something that my dad does that drives me absolutely insane. So my mom buys ice cream.

She buys it. She doesn't eat it. She buys it for me and my dad to share. It's like a communal ice cream. Okay, well, that's not a good Zach Braff movie. And we both eat out of the carton. Now, my dad likes chocolate syrup. I sometimes like it. Most of the time. I know what's going on. My dad will pour the chocolate syrup into the carton of the ice cream instead of putting it in a bowl. Inexcusable. And that ruins it for me inexcusable most of the time

i don't want it so when i go to open it right there's chocolate syrup all over the place he says there's not but there is oh i like this because i'm looking at it um now i need him to know that it's an extremely inconsiderate thing to do yeah um and if he wants the chocolate syrup he should be putting in a bowl yeah but he doesn't chocolate syrup he should be putting it in a bowl yeah but he doesn't think that he should be putting it in a bowl because he says oh well it's it you're not going to notice it i eat all of it and he doesn't and i've seen that so um you don't where do you guys fall on this and uh how do i get him to understand that this is something he should not be doing to his son hey uh chris i'll see you january 20th at celebrity theater in phoenix

life rips hell yeah dude chris.com for tickets dude hey how about this use bowls you fucking heathens yeah oh here's here's the main thing though how do you convince him like show him i know show him the chocolate syrup in the in the car i know what you don't like he doesn't believe it i know what's happening it's not that. And the dad's just like. Of course. Yeah. So it's like, I get what the dad's doing, but use bowls, you heathens. Yeah, use bowls. Dude, you're two different people. Yeah. Yes, exactly.

Use bowls. You share it. You know you share it. Heathens. Yeah. Yes. And also, chocolate syrup. Is gross.

Sucks, bro. You're a fucking disgusting father. It sucks, dude. You're a fucking disgusting father fat fuck and honestly disgraceful that you use it sometimes you heathen yeah here's another thing that you could always pull you say to your dad oh you know what you do it again you put chocolate sauce on the thing i'm gonna start drinking again great i'll be on you my life's on you as you walk away and the next day show up so drunk you know it's interesting congratulations

on your sobriety though these kinds of things are often like yeah well yeah but that that well but it could be that no that's not what this is your dad is plain ass wrong plain old plain ass dead ass wrong i'm liking it okay i don't like anything about this so now what you're gonna do is make sure that he uses a bowl from here on out okay or give your mom you cheap ass fuck a little bit of money to buy two ice cream fair enough have one that is yours and one that is his the dad yeah yeah but when he does then you'll have even more of a legitimate gripe your dad is fucking everything up won't matter though but give your mom a few extra bucks to get two of them no that's the answer is use bowls obviously but it's

cost effective but it's obviously not going to be done by the father fuck i'm angry yeah that's the point so we're gonna you know what i would do honestly when the ice cream came i would take half of it out and put in a bowl in the freezer wow you're crazy i would that's crazy though it it needs to be done it's a necessity and when i would do it i would go like this yes got out of that one yeah you would do that because dude it's like god chocolate syrup sucks so bad why does he want chocolate syrup on his ice cream it's fine you like what you like but ice cream comes already done it's so sweet it's so sweetly flavored it's finished it's finished they tested the taste of it i i know i dude you're talking to me bro and they put the thing in the cart and it's done i don't even like cranberry sauce on thanksgiving dinners i get it dude

yeah it's done i want everything a la carte so So when I can, you know me, right? I have met you, yeah. So it's like, I get the brownie and the ice cream. I take the brownie. I dole out how much ice cream I want out of the brownie. You don't put, don't you dare put the fucking ice cream on the brownie. That's different. Nah, it's not different, dude. I'll tell you why it's not different too.

Because the ice cream melts all over the brownie because the brownie's hot. Dude, guess what? I'm in the restaurant. Don't even fucking microwave the brownie. I'll decide. Thank you very muchie i'll decide thank you very much you'll decide what the heat the temperature and how much ice cream gets doled out on the brownie at an at a restaurant how you're gonna go in the back in chief um i gonna

go in the back no no i say i would like dude i go to this restaurant sometimes i don't and they get they have a brownie and and the nerve of these motherfuckers, man, you go to the brownie and they say, okay, great. You don't say anything. They bring it with fucking whipped cream,

ice cream, nuts, motherfucker. It says brownie. So I say, it doesn't say under it comes with it. No. So I say brownie.

I want the brownie. Don't heat it up. And then I want ice cream on the side of it. And it comes bing, bam, boom. I got the way I want the brownie. Don't heat it up. And then I want ice cream on the side of it. And it comes. Bing, bam, boom. I got the way I want it. Okay. Okay, that's the end.

But you sounded mad. That's a good ending. It's infuriating that people think brownie comes with everything. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's not good. Here's another one. Hey. Oh, dude, this drives me drives me fuck why do people put a

fucking lime in club soda or water here's the worst part you don't think that's bad well let me grind your gears okay would you like a would you like a lime that they just ask that right yeah no thank you yeah great that's how it should be. You're saying, right? No, that's what they do. Oh, okay. They go club soda guy at the bar just puts the lime on here. Now you're, we're getting into territory. You asked me some shit. I didn't, I had to answer.

It shouldn't even be on there period. Cause I just asked for a club soda. If I want a lime on it, I should say, hi, I'd like a club soda with lime. If I just said club soda, don't ask me about lime. But if you're going to ask me about lime and I say, no connect with the bartender on it i should say hi i'd like a club soda with lime if i just said club soda don't ask me about lime but if you're gonna ask me about lime and i say no connect with the bartender on it yeah i completely agree i didn't think you're gonna agree no of course i agree well i mean if they ask you do you want something you say no and they bring it to you and it comes with the thing you specifically said you didn't i know i know then there's no you could have said it's not a big deal but there's no opinion there it just is the plain fact that obviously it

shouldn't come with a line i know all right let's do another one all right so hi what's up fellas my name is hans i live in anchorage alaska um that's southern alaska no one cares not northern alaska i don't care about keep going do my. However many weeks ago, Chris mentioned how people in Northern Alaska may not find anybody, you know, to marry or whatnot. I did find somebody. My fiance is from Alaska. Cool. However, we did meet in Boise.

So there's that, you know. But I just wanted to mention that. Is she from Boise then? Because, you know, maybe our Oklahoma girl, there's some hope for her. You know, I found love all the way up here in Alaska. Hey, nice. So anyways, I'm just calling though with some questions. I'm getting married this summer.

Nice. And I know my opinion does not matter. And I'm okay with that. I'm 1,000% okay with that. Oh, about the wedding. However, my fiance still wants input. Yeah. How do I go about that?

You know, planning for a wedding, that's my question. But knowing your opinion or input isn't really going to be taken seriously. I'm not offended by it, but she still asks all the time. I know I want to be involved, but it's like, you know, it's her day. She's going to get what she wants. That's my question, guys. You're awesome. And hello from Alaska.

Thanks, bud. What up, man? Appreciate you. Here's how it goes. You say, look, I'm 100 100 happy to give you my opinion on options but i'm not going to generate any ideas for it because they're just going to get shot down and why waste either one of our well he's precious time so what what you should do is do pull together your ideas and then you know as like a sub whatever of your ideas options about those ideas and i will pick

the things i'll put my vote forward but i'm not going to be generating any ideas about this stuff nor do i think i should that should all be from her and then you get your input you tell you know you have your voice heard about the options she provides you but i think that he's talking about when she asks him a question yeah not necessarily generating ideas i think she's like like i took it as hey what color do you want the napkins this one or this one yeah that's what it should be what do you mean that's what i'm saying because i think bro because women will still be like you'll be like oh i like this one they'll be like no i'm gonna go with this one well that's crazy well then here's the advice say okay yeah don't care if you don't care then what do you

care yeah that's the thing if you know if you don't care a and you have no problem with your voice being drowned out by hers what's what is even the problem how to act this is how you act hey honey you know i we want the tablecloths but we don't know if we want this color or that color what do you think oh i want that color and she says oh no actually i think this color is better you say oh yeah that color's great too you finished you finished it all congrats you're done i don't know you go like this i like this color you like this color i like this color oh really i like this color cool i'm not marrying you or that yeah i don't um yeah yeah i don't know uh i think it's fine. And marriage is less about, you know, I think wanting to, you know, I mean, you say, oh. Wow.

You know, you gave up. You look at your house and you're like, oh, how much of this did I decorate? Zero. You know, and then it's like, I don't care, actually. Yeah. I think that's the. Dude, it's so good for everybody. And this is a recommendation to everyone,

men and women and everybody in between, okay? The more things you don't care about in your relationship, the better off your life and your partner's life will be. Yeah, that is true. So anytime you realize the sneaking suspicion, oh, wait a second. Oh, wait. Oh, I don't give a shit about this. Yeah, that is true. So anytime you realize the sneaking suspicion, oh, wait a second. Oh, wait. Oh, I don't give a shit about this.

Roll with that. Stick with that. Yeah. Go with that because it's good for both of you. It's good for business. Everyone's going to be happier. Mm-hmm. So stick with that.

That is man and woman's best friend. It's good for business. Not caring. Okay? Yeah, it's a dog, but yeah. It's good for business. No, man and woman's, yeah, right. Okay.

After dog, it's man and woman's yeah right okay after dog it's man and woman's best friend so dog's man's best friend second best friend a man not caring about the relationship well no dog is man's best friend not caring is man and woman's best friends different category not caring okay so a best friend is man how about single man's best friend is a dog best friend in a relationship if it's a if you're a guy is not caring about the relate what the woman wants in a relationship and letting it slide taking it so seriously but if you have a dog in the relationship then the dog goes to moves to second right yeah okay okay great that's fine are we done i would say yeah well you know what honestly i think we're done with that that could be it that could be the last one that's that is literally the last submission of the year 2023 oh wow yeah

that that was okay i will say that's the that that's not uh for last submission in 2023 it was horrible it was horrible but guess what it gives it makes the bar for next year lower and we're gonna top it you raise me up you raise the bar up um josh groban for some reason i can't sing it so i'm not gonna try i i to the tune of you raise me up i think and sing sometimes to myself the lyrics you braise my beef no reason at all we better not end the year on that sing you braise my beef and that'll be the end you you braise my beef see it's good dude wait you've always thought this for some reason i just think you braise my beef. You braised my beef. There you go. See?

That's a great note to end on. Are you kidding me? That's tippy top shit. What do you call those pressure... In a beautiful pressure cooker, you braised my beef. I don't even know if you braise beef in a pressure cooker. I have no idea. Nobody knows anything. Nobody even knows what the word braise means.

Even chefs. That's not true. Yes, it is, dude. and if you prove me wrong right now it's over braise my braiser hand uh all right well look uh happy new year tomorrow happy new year tomorrow and get those tickets dude uh i will be in albuquerque and el paso and sacramento and brea and houston and uh phoenix and all sorts of places corpus christi i'm going to be in Albuquerque and El Paso and Sacramento and Brea and Houston and Phoenix and all sorts of places. Corpus Christi, I'm going to be in for some reason. Kelowna, Vancouver. And go watch Grow or Die. You know what?

Go to Chrisley.com, get Grow or Die. Watch it tomorrow. Watching it on the first would be a great way to start your year. That's my new special. And then come see me on tour. I see all new stuff. So watch the special and then see all my new stuff. Thank you very much.

And also subscribe to Lifeline Luxury. Yes, patreon.com backslash, is it slash? Patreon.com slash Lifeline Luxury, the second best show in the world. First show, first best show in the world being this show, Lifeline.

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You want a one-on-one, a one-on-one, a one-on-one with me? Go to mattdalia.com. Book an advice session now. And of course, if you want the great Lifeline merch, go to lifelinemerch.com. All good. Happy New Year. We will see you all in 2024 oh yeah you braised my beef