Lighthouse Horror Podcast - I Got A Job At A Hotel. It Has A STRANGE List Of Rules | Scary Stories

Episode Date: December 13, 2023

I applied for a job as a hotel bellboy, and the interview came with some peculiar rules.        Story from fashionablecrow Make sure to check out more of their work at u/fashionablecrow   ��    Original Post: The Rules of the Magnum Hotel : r/nosleep    Original YouTube link: I Got A Job At A Hotel. It Has A STRANGE List Of Rules.           For more stories like this one, check out my YouTube channel: Lighthouse Horror | YouTube  Patreon: Lighthouse Horror | Patreon Merch: lighthousehorror.com  Sound Effects: Freesound Zapsplat  Music: Lucas King - YouTube Myuu - YouTube  Incompetech Thank you for listening to this scary story! If you enjoyed this new creepypasta story, please check out some of my other horror stories. We'll be uploading new episodes every week, featuring ghost stories, haunted encounters, mysteries, true stories, creepypasta, and anything supernatural and paranormal. Don't miss out on the thrill and suspense that await you in each episode!

Back in October of last year, I applied for a job as a hotel bellboy and the interview came with some peculiar rules. I'd been laid off in August, like many others, and this opening came up and passing during a conversation at a bar. I was camping on a college friend's couch at 22. We decided to meet his girlfriend to get out of the house and have a drink with her old sorority sisters. The term outdoor in 50% capacity had been stretched to its limit in Hoboken. The only real change since the pandemic was that no one could sit at the bar and they put less tables on the floor, meaning seating was cramped. That's how I met Catherine. In the commotion, my group rushed to find seats with some friends we already knew. Catherine

had been talking to my friend Jill when everyone scrambled to make room for us, and she hesitated to move during the seating shuffle. When everyone was settled, my roommate had stolen Jill away to another table. and Catherine was trapped with us. Catherine was a pretty blonde girl with big brown eyes and definitely one of Jill's sorority sisters. While conversation kicked up for our group, Catherine was quiet, obviously feeling kind of awkward and excluded. I guess she only really knew Jill, so I struck up a conversation with her to be polite. Of course, there's a limited number of topics near strangers are comfortable having with each other at first. Inevitably, I asked her what she did for a living.

I work at the Magnum, she said as if I'd know what that was. To be fair, most of my friends who'd taken up business degrees and gotten jobs as analysts of some kind answered the question the same way. My biology major didn't lend itself to company names. When I asked, she explained it was a luxury hotel in the city. I thought hotels weren't doing so well right now, I said. It's the type of place with clients rich enough to rent out floors for six weeks," Catherine explained.

We kind of don't worry about rotating traffic. Pays well, tips are pretty good too. Biggest problem is the short staff since, you know. The giant unemployment elephant in the room all of us young workers refused to acknowledge hovered wordlessly between us. I spent the rest of the night talking to her about hockey, latching on to the fact that she was a devil's fan. I didn't really get desperate enough to consider hotel service until a month later when my already pathetic savings had dwindled to almost nothing, and none of my

other prospects had panned out in my field. I was staring down my last can of tuna, and, though Brian hadn't asked, I knew I should be paying rent or moving out by now. I wasn't going to move in with my asshole dad, and my mom just sold her house to pay for her own hospital expenses. Money, any money, would do. I decided to take a chance and text Catherine, hoping she wouldn't be offended that this was the first time I was reaching out to her since we met. I got an automatic message back that I was texting a landline. I half assumed then that she gave me a fake number, one off from her cell or something.

Part of me found that amusing. I called it, half expecting an automatic machine to tell me I'd connect to the moon and the rejection system. This would be a funny little anecdote to tell Jill if that was the case, and maybe a little concerning for my social skills. But no, two rings in. Catherine picked up. Hello? Oh, hi, I said, stilted, shocked she was actually on the other side. Catherine. This is Catherine, right? Right about then, I realized I didn't remember her last name. Um, from the the bar the other night for Jill Delaney's sorority sister reunion. It's Jesse, by the way. Smooth as sandpaper. Yes, I remember. You are right over there, Jesse? Yeah, I just didn't

expect you to answer a landline. Right, she said sheepishly. I forgot that. They don't really let us use cell phones here, so I kind of fell into the habit of giving out people my work phone. Sorry. You can call me Cat, by the way. Cat. Okay. You're working. I can call back. Or you can call me back. Or I heard myself making a bigger deal out of a simple question than it should be. I had a question about your job. If you were still hiring. I mean the magnum. Like if it was still hiring. I was listening to myself nervously rattle off nonsense wondering why I wasn't dropping day. for mortification yet. Somehow, after that mess, Catherine didn't immediately hang up. She even told me she'd asked the manager about potential openings. I didn't hear anything for two days after that,

and had almost forgotten about it, when my friend Brian dropped a manila envelope on my lap. It was addressed to me, though I usually had my mail forwarded to my mom's in South Jersey. But there it was. When I opened it, there was a little introductory letter to me in type and textured paper. Dear Jesse Falks, your interest in joining the Magnum's hospitable team. We have been referred your information and believe that it may fit the goals of our hotel. We would like to extend an invitation to conduct a formal interview and further discuss your skills and qualifications in relation to further opportunities.

Please arrive at the following address, at no later than 10 a.m. Sharp on Saturday, 1010, 2020. Before your interview, please be sure to study the following rules before arriving and to come prepared. Number one, if you arrive by car, you may park on the east lot in any blue space. Do not park in the white or reserve spaces. These are for guests. Number two, you will enter through the eastern entrance. An eagle in the bronze filigree on the door is the correct entrance should you not notice any signs. Number three. If the door is open, walk in and proceed to step 3A. Number four, if the door is closed, walk around to the south side entrance marked with a decorative woman and proceed to step

3B. Number five, please bring a printed copy of your resume. A, if you have arrived through the situation described in 2A, hotel staff will be there to greet you. Give the blonde attendant your coat and hat and other personal belongings, if you have either, and deposit any electronic devices on your person into the bin sitting on the accent table beside the mirror. B, if you have arrived through the situation described in 2B, you will be alone. Place your electronic devices likewise in a bin on the nearest accent table without a mirror. in front of it. Leave your personal belongings, including purses, handbags, backpacks, timekeeping devices, wallets, keys, papers, notebooks, books, pens, pencils, and hats on the chair

beside the table. You may proceed with your coat. Number six, proceed to room zero zero two and on the map provided. Please take the time to memorize both routes. You shall not be permitted to speak to staff or guests under any circumstances. A. Do not interact with the staff or diverge from the most direct route possible. Number 7. When arriving, knock twice. Enter when you hear two knocks in return. Number eight, if you arrived in situation 2A described above, sit in the chair to the left. If you arrived in situation to be described above, sit in the chair behind the desk of your interviewer. In the unlikely event that all chairs are filled, stand in the left-hand corner. In the unlikely event, that there is only one chair, stand in the left-hand corner. Number nine, if it is only

you and the interviewer, you will introduce yourself first with the following phrase, What a swell day it is to be out yonder. Lovely to meet you. I'm your full name, hear about the position. If you entered through the situation described in 2B, however, you may introduce yourself as you please. Number 10. If there is anyone else in the room you are to wait to be spoken to.

If there is a woman in the room wearing green or a man with a feather in his breast pocket, do not speak to them no matter what they see. say to you. If there is a man in the room with a hat, look immediately to the floor and do not look up at him for the remainder of the time he's in the room. If there is a man wearing red in the room, do not say nor confirm your full name throughout the duration of the interview. When asked to speak in this group, the phrase you will say in turn to your interviewer, it's a pleasure to meet you as well, I am excited for this opportunity to become a part of the Grands a Luscious The illustrious team.

Number 11. The interview will be conducted at this time, answer honestly all questions, barring the caveats mentioned above. Number 12. You are not to leave the room until dismissed. Number 13. Upon leaving, you will wait for any women in the room to stand and exit first. Do be sure to stand if they rise from their seats and return to your seat when finished.

If the man with a feather in his breast pocket is in the room. room, you will wait for him to dismiss you before leaving. Number 14. When exiting, you will leave through the east side entrance. And number 15, discuss this list with no one. We're excited to meet you. Call with any questions or clarifications. The Magnum.

I looked at the rules and flipped to the other pages in this packet. There was a map of the parking lot and first floor, contact information, clothing requirements, and an old-fashioned brochure listing benefits, responsibilities, and average salary of a bellboy, which was too good for what I expected to be a minimum wage experience. I think I'm being pranked. I told Brian, letting him read over the rules. Brian laughed and told me to toss it in the garbage or just frame it. It was garbage, Which, yeah, but I knew the only person who would have Taylor made this garbage for me. I was flattered.

Really, this was pretty elaborate, and I'll admit very detailed, down to the weathered look of the floor map. I went to text Kat, then remembered I still didn't have her cell. I called the landline instead to say thanks for the prank gift. I didn't send you anything, Kat said, sounding genuinely surprised. I thought it was funny, Kat. the rules list is kind of just dramatic, don't you think? Rules? Kat sounded confused over the phone, and then laughed. Oh, right. I forgot how weird they are

when you start this job. What? I didn't send you anything. Kat said again. All I did was mention you to my manager, lied a bit, and said you had some experience in hospitality. It's not like this job is demanding. He asked for your name and address, and I know you live with Jill's boyfriend, so easy enough. Your name is Jesse Fulkes, right? Yeah. He sent you a package, right? Lots of weird rules? If it is only you and the interviewer, you will introduce yourself first with the following phrase. What a swell day it is to be out yonder. I read dramatically. Yep, Katz said, laughing a little. You're actually supposed to follow them. Seriously? I'm not going to remember all this trash, I said, not without a checklist or something. Hold on. Kat hung up and she didn't call back

in a few minutes. She didn't call back until the next day. Hey, Jesse, Kat said. So I asked around and I was right. You don't have to worry. It's always the same. The rules are overcomplicated. If you want, I can go over them with you, but essentially you're supposed to follow the 2B rule set." That's it? Yeah. I felt the biggest weight lift off my chest then, thinking of having an income again. If these people wanted me to sing and tap dance, I'd learn the choreography fine. At the end of the day, I'd have the job and it's easier to hire someone than fire them.

If this was all just a complicated hazing, fine. I asked Kat directly what lines I had to have. had to know for my play act of an interview. She started listing them off casually, but then sort of petered off. If you don't think you'll have it by Saturday, Kat said, a little hesitantly. I can come over and help you go over it. I grimaced. She was inviting herself over. Kat seemed sweet, and I wanted to think of it as a kind gesture, but this felt a little too above and beyond. I held the phone to my chest, Just panicking, looking for Brian to hiss my concerns at, but he was off at the gym. Suggest somewhere public, I thought to myself.

Uh, how about we talk it over at, like, the park instead? Tomorrow? When do you get off work? I'm off at six tomorrow, actually. It'll be dark by then, I thought. Whoa, there's a coffee house nearby. We could meet at the green. She agreed, and I hung up feeling pretty good about relocating it to somewhere impersonal.

Brian laughed at me when I told him later, and I realized I probably made it sound like a date. Shit. The not date review of the rules was actually not as bad as I thought it would be. Kat seemed truly eager to get down to the business regarding what to do and when. She kept the list in her hand and made me recite each step. We ignored all the caveats and kept to the bare necessities. of the path she and the other employees went through. And after you leave your stuff in the bin, but the jacket I can take. I chime in. When you get inside the room and sit in the back chair,

you'll say, It's a pleasure to meet you as well. I'm excited for this opportunity to become a part of the Grand's illustrious bullshit team. Catherine smiled wide, observing me with wide brown eyes. You're hired. She teased. I felt pretty all right about Saturday. The attire required was another hurdle, but not as bad as the others. Black pants, black shirt with a collar, black shoes, red tie. I had some slacks for my graduation and borrowed the shirt from Brian. Jill and I found a tie for a buck at a thrift store. I took the subway into the city and made it to the Magnum at sometime around 9.50. As Cat had promised, the east entrance was closed, which meant I was going around to the south entrance. The building itself looked like any other hotel I'd seen

in the city, tall, stone structures with filigree and crest that added some extra air of importance to the structure's existence. To add to that, it was right across from the park, but only four blocks from a Chipotle. Nothing in the city is above being neighbors with convenient fast food. Before I even got inside, however, everything kind of went sideways. The east side entrance was closed as it was supposed to be, but so was the south side door. The filigree of a woman stared back at me, refusing to budge. This was the south side. This was the door I was supposed to walk through. But I pulled on the handle and it didn't open. I knocked and waited.

No one came. I rushed immediately back to the east side door, half dreading that it was the open one. If that was the case, I was screwed. I only knew the rules for the B scenarios. But when I tried that door, it was just as locked as the other. The hell? I walked around the street looking for another entrance, but couldn't find one. It was soon 10.05, and I was wondering if something had gone wrong.

So, I did the only thing I could think of. I called Cat. She answered quickly enough. What do you mean the doors closed? Cat snapped. It's Saturday, isn't it? Yeah, it is. You're supposed to be here.

I saw it on Robert's schedule. He— Hold on. I'm coming down. just go to the east side of the building and walk past the door into the alley. There's an employee entrance there. I can let you in. Just wait there.

She hung up on me and I practically sprinted back around the wide building. The alley she was talking about was the odd backing to an otherwise opulent building. The walls were flat, the dumpsters crowding both sides and half open, reeking with garbage. Even in the middle of morning, it was dark in that little crack of space. The door cat mentioned was a bland gray door that looked severe and functional, completely detached from the gaudy façade that decorated the front. I paced up and down the chipped asphalt, dodging the glass chips and piles of crates. Then the white door opened, and I turned at attention. But it wasn't cat at the door.

What are you doing here, kid? You lost? A man asked. He wore a trim red and in black uniform and a little name tag that said Eddie. Instinctively, I would have answered no and babbled about being here for an interview, but I knew I wasn't supposed to be back here. This was off the interview script, and if this was my only entrance, I couldn't be shooed away from it. I'm the new guy. J-Rob told me to come in this way today. I said, boldly dropping the name I heard Cat use. But I... I made an awkward gesture toward the door, trying to convey going through and hoping vague complications seem like an understandable enough barrier.

Oh, he said, seeming to think my uncertainty was warranted. His thin lips pressed together tight, and he gave me an odd kind of look. He may have wanted to say something, but instead quickly shouldered a large garbage bag that had been laid at his feet behind him and held the door open for me. Go on, then. He's got an interview of something today so you can wait for him in the break room. 15E. I took the door from him and held it open and turned so he could take the garbage.

Thanks. Eddie nodded. His bag was dripping garbage slime, which is never pleasant, but he didn't seem bothered to have it hauled over his shoulder. When he walked it past me, there wasn't the lingering smell of garbage, but there was something like iron. He walked on, and I walked into the hotel, the door closing behind me. I looked down at the polished floor, and there were stains where the garbage bag had been.

They were a little red-brown, like the kind you'd see on a counter or a cutting board after cutting up a steak. Expired meat, I thought to myself. I realized Eddie wouldn't take too long to throw out the trash, and I had to be out of sight by the time he arrived to not get caught. I sprinted down the hall through a few sets of double doors, heading inward to the best of my approximation, hoping to hit a lobby or room numbers to guide my way. Soon enough, the tile floor turned to green carpet, and the ornate facade was back as I walked

into the main rooms. I looked at the first door beside me. 025E. It wasn't where I was supposed to be, but it gave me an idea of where to go. Cat showed me a direct route on the map, so I knew I had to walk to the North Wing first, which meant following ease numbers until they dwindled to one near the lobby, and then continuing on the way I would have if I entered through the southern entrance. I still had my coat and my phone, but this wasn't unmanageable.

I could fake it. First things first, I had to get rid of my stuff. The hall was ornate, decorated with slim wooden tables and delicate golden. electric lighting. There were pieces of ivory, jade, and copper art that looked expensive. I quickly removed my coat and my phone by 011E and kind of bundled both up and shoved it in a nice, wide porcelain vase. I wasn't about to lose a stupid interview over a technicality. I continued on, half afraid I was already lost until I hit the first wall with a copper bust of some 1800s guy. Kat had mentioned it before. I was in the hall directly behind the lobby and standing directly

behind the concierge desk now. All I had to do from here is turn left, or I would have if I was coming from the south side. Now I just had to keep walking and I'd be there. I'd keep going, turning right at the women's restroom and then 002N was on the right. As past the bust, two-chating women dressed as staff, rounded the corner and spotted me. When they did, they went dead silent. They didn't slow down, but they stared, jaws falling a little slack at the sight of me. I tried to smile back, but they ducked their heads away and kept walking. One of the girls dropped something. It was heavy enough that they should have been able to hear the dull thud, but they rounded the corner instead of stopping. It was a key.

I picked it up and it was clearly an old-fashioned room key, not a card for an electric door, but a heavy brass key with a little tag that said zero zero one. I backtracked a little, trying to catch their attention. They huddled closer together, walking arm and arm, whispering and giggling to one another. One threw her head back to sneak a glance at the empty hall and looked genuinely surprised to see me. I held the key up, showing her wordlessly what she left. She nodded and tossed her head to the side, as if saying, get going. But she raised her hand to her lips and turned her back to me, breaking into a run arm

and arm with her friend. I turned the key over in my hands. This was the part of the hall I was supposed to walk into. The instructions said I wasn't supposed to talk to staff. Maybe she knew that. Maybe she was one of Kat's friends and was helping me out. Should I have left the key on the ground? Was this a part of this weird hazing? I have to bait it just leaving it on the floor, but it was in my hand anyway. I'd turn it into the guy in my interview and tell him what happened. Maybe that was the point of it. Finally, I found room zero zero two-end was where

cat set it be, the second to last door in a dead-end hall. The last door, 001, was propped open, slightly ajar. Inside, the lights were off, giving me only a glimpse of the carpet. I knocked twice on 002N like I was supposed to. Come in, I heard from the other side of the door. I remained outside, at ease, knowing what Cat and I had rehearsed. Hey, I said, come in, the guy on the other side called, a little louder. I shifted a little, debating if I should knock again. No, two knocks. Cat had even wrapped her knuckles against the table when we went over it.

I was supposed to wait for two knocks. As I waited, I heard another noise just behind me. From zero one, the door squeaked on its hinges. When I turned, it was a little more open, but I still couldn't see much from my angle. I could hear something inside, though. Someone was moving around, scratching against the wall just across from me. I heard a voice, like an old man's, moan weakly. Help!

He said, his voice sorrowful and cracked. Somebody, help. I don't know what made me weary. Maybe it was something in the voice. Desperate, yes, but a little too clear, like it knew I was there to hear it. Some instinctive part of me told me to stay put. Then the groaning stopped and there was a heavy thud like a fist pounding the wall. I heard the man inside groaned and shone.

shuffle again, slowly making his way down the length of the rum closer to the door. I knocked again at 002N. Hey, hey, there's someone here. I called, only to be met with no response. The groaning crept closer to the door. Help, just help. I rushed to Door Zero Zero One, grabbed the handle, and slammed it shut. I didn't look inside, but I caught a waft of the smell.

The pungent stench of a sewer on a rainy day came to mind, like something had died and rotted inside. Then a hand reached out and grabbed my wrist and tugged. I was thrown back against the opposite side of the hall, and there was cat, pulling the door closed. Room Zero-0-01 shook as the thing on the opposite side threw its full. weight against the door. Cat turned and looked at me, holding her hand out.

The key! She hissed. The key! My hands were shaking as I fished into my pocket for the brass key. I hardly had it out of my pocket when Cat snatched it away and locked the door. Another powerful bang sent her stumbling back to the opposite side of the hall. It was then. I heard too calm, controlled knocks behind me.

I nearly jumped back to the other side before suddenly remembering this was 002N and I was waiting on them. I looked to Kat, who paused, midway through fixing her blouse. Kat pulled me onto my feet and fixed my tie. Don't worry about that. Kat whispered hastily. Tell them you lock the door with no one's help. I wasn't here.

Go. I practically threw the door open and sprinted in. Three members of the hotel staff sat inside, all very composed and evidently confused by my heavy breathing and my no doubt priceless expression. What's the matter, love? You look absolutely shaken, the woman behind the desk asked. Uh, I immediately shut my mouth, taking in exactly who was in the room and where. There were three people like Kat had warned me.

But they weren't. They were more distracting than I expected. Cat told me to expect to see a man in a red vest, and I did since I'd stumbled into his chair. What I didn't expect was for him to be badly burned. A nasty pinkish scar ran up his neck, shriveling his chin, his ear, and his nostrils. One eye was permanently shut, and the other was crooked. The other, was a woman who stood in the corner. She loomed over the chair next to the man in red, her sunken eyes fixed intensely on me. There's no other word to describe her, other than intense. I felt like I was under scrutiny for how I moved and how loud my steps were as I passed her. She was very tall, so tall she had developed a hunch from years of bending her neck to look down

at people. She said nothing to me, but her head turned, tracking me as I went. The last was the woman in green I wasn't supposed to speak to. She was sharply dressed, and quite pretty, but was also the one sitting behind the desk where I expected my interviewer to be. I wasn't supposed to speak to her, wasn't I? That was the whole point Kat had drilled into my head. The one I wasn't supposed to worry about was the looming woman who twitched when I took my seat in the chair behind the desk. Can I get you a glass of water, love?" The woman in green asked sweetly. You're our ten o'clock, aren't you?

Jesse Fawkes. He's skinny, the tall one said, buggy eyes still set on me. Her pale tongue darted out to lick her lips. Behave, Lori, the man told the tall woman. Jesse, this is Lori Belaford Honorary Front Office Manager. He said, nodding to the tall woman. He then gestured to the woman in green. Frederique Xardy, the general manager of this hotel, and I'm Robert Strauss,

chief concierge and hiring manager. You can tell us a little about yourself. I, uh, I, it's a pleasure to meet you as well. I'm excited for this opportunity to become a part of the Grands. I couldn't remember the stupid word used between this part. Illustrious team, Frederica supplied. Close enough, I'd say. The three of them chuckled a little.

I looked at Robert. I. There's something in room one that. Robert held up a hand. We'll get to that. Okay. Did you have any trouble finding the entrance? Robert asked. No. No. I, uh, someone walked out when I walked in. At which entrance?

The East one. Strange, I was sure both were locked. Robert said, looking dead on at me. He arched a brow, waiting for my input. When I provided none, he continued. Why did you? Why do you? you lie. I didn't have any trouble finding the entrance. Do you know what was in the bag? Laurie asked. Her voice pitched high and eager. What bag?

Robert asked, looking confused. The bag Eddie had, Laurie said. I shook my head, too terrified by her gaze to really reply to her. Robert arched a brow. You saw Eddie? janitor. For a second, I said hesitantly. Robert and Frederica shared a look, but Frederica smiled. It is an east side entrance. Robert cleared his throat and moved on. Then you saw two girls drop a key to room one. Why'd you keep it? I wasn't going to keep it. I was going to give it to them

when I came in, but then room one. The woman in green supplied. I almost answered in the affirmative, and then stopped myself. She smiled wide, amused to nearly catch me. What'd you do? Robert asked. I, I closed the door and locked it. That's it. Yeah. Why didn't you go into the room to see who was calling, he asked. I had a bad feeling. And you weren't tempted to look. Walk in. Just see. Robert asked. That was a test, wasn't it? I asked. Are people supposed to look? If they don't want to be here, Lori said, with that wrinkled, over-eager grin. Does she upset you? Frederica asked me, Suddenly, with a wicked grin. As she did, Laurie's wrinkled face curled into a frown, and her eyes were still menacing

me. I wanted to protest, but I'm not supposed to speak to her. I started weighing how much I cared about the rules in a place already as twisted as this. She does, doesn't she? Frederica taunted. Hear that, Laurie. He thinks you're disgusting. Laurie stopped forward and suddenly was looming over me, and I had nowhere to go but the

back of my chair as buggy eyes glared further and further down into me. Then Robert cleared his throat. That'll be enough, thank you. Laurie and Frederica stood, and I stood as well as they both made their exits. I looked to Robert then. What kind of place is this? One that requires discretion, a good sense of memorization and improvisation. I think you'll be a good fit here," Robert said, standing and walking over to the desk.

He unlocked a cabinet drawer and pulled out some papers. He then drew a handkerchief and reached up, pulling up a piece of the skin at the top of his I nearly leapt up out of my seat as he started peeling the skin back. Holy! Robert kept pulling until half his face was removed, but there was no fleshy muscle beneath, just a regular half of a face. It was makeup. Burn makeup.

Excuse me a moment, the prosthetics itch, but I'd like to make you an offer to sign on. with us. It was on makeup, I asked. Part of the interview. The bag Eddie carried was meant to be suspicious and Joe gets a kick out of scaring the new guys in room one. See, like I said, this is a job that's unpredictable and we look for a certain personality type. We try to learn it as quickly as possible. Robert wiped off the rest of the makeup with his handkerchief and looked like a normal man in his mid-forties. Most people break with Lori or forget the rules with Freddy. I looked dumbfounded from the door to him. That's it? That's the interview. Yes. Don't you want to ask me questions? Oh, I've learned about everything I need to know from you. The fact that you

were able to find us and send a letter of inquiry to us at all is to start to let me know you know what kind of place this is. Following the rules and your reaction to our surprises, for you tells me everything else I need to know. What kind of place do you work that you need to know how I'd react to a bloody bag and a guy moaning from another room? Robert straightened and smiled as if that was a question with the most obvious answer. We're a luxury hotel. Half our job is going about as if it's business as usual, but it's not. There's a lot of protocol to follow, and it requires you to know what to do in a lot of situations. Did you have anyone help you with the rules? No, I say as I rehearsed. I wasn't supposed to show them to anyone else, also an extreme

part of this test. Good, Robert said. If you can't memorize a and follow those instructions in the time we gave you, then you wouldn't be able to handle this job. But you were a natural. But you still have enough independence that you're not completely lacking in critical thought. You'll do well here. Listen, after all this, I don't even know if I want this job. Robert didn't say anything, just showed me the starting salary. This This was the walk through fire, but I can guarantee if you sign on with us so long as you stick to the rules, you'll be fine. The money was good.

Really good. The first set of rules wasn't so bad. If this was some kind of weird promoting discretion, then fine. Joe and Eddie were a setup. I could keep my mouth shut. If they'd let me in and all I had to do was learn a routine, fine, so I took the job. It was better than anything I'd get in a lab, and in that moment things had gone from terrifying to completely lax.

I signed a contract there and went home with a set of rules, a schedule, and a signing bonus. I was giddy, waving my check in Brian's face. Jill came by later, and I wholeheartedly thanked her too. Hill, I'm so glad you keep good friends, I said, as I tore into the new list of rules. What do you mean? Catherine. Who? Catherine.

I still couldn't remember her last name. Your sorority sister. You were sitting with her at your reunion before we arrived. Oh. Jill nodded. I turned back to my employee contract and pulled out the new list. list of rules, flipping to the first page. You mean that blonde girl?

Jill asked. I only met her that night. I thought she was a friend of yours. Rule number one. Never speak to Catherine. Never give her your name. Well, shit.