Lions Led By Donkeys Podcast - Episode 32- Everyone is a Nazi!
Episode Date: December 31, 2018On this episode Joe is joined by Army Veteran and one of the characters from The Hooligans of Kandahar, Mike Huang to talk about how a number of people ended up volunteering for the German Army during... World War Two from a guy who ended up becoming a US Army Green Beret, the son of the founding dictator of Taiwan, and a poor Korean conscript who ended up fighting for everybody on accident. Support the show: http://www.patreon.com/lionsledbydonkeys Buy some merchandise: https://teespring.com/stores/lions-led-by-donkeys-store follow the show: @lions_by follow Joe @jkass99
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Hello and welcome to another episode of the Lions Led by Donkeys podcast. I'm Joe.
Nick is still in Japan.
So with me today is Mike Wong.
Mike is a U.S. Army veteran, college student, and one of the starring characters from my book, The Hooligans of Kandahar.
How are you doing today?
Oh, fantastic.
What's going on, everybody?
Yeah, Mike is joining us from New York, Brooklyn, right?
I was in Brooklyn, but I live in Queens now.
I'm always going to claim to be from Brooklyn, though.
At least until you're priced out by Amazon.
Yeah, until I can't live in New York anymore.
It's coming. It's coming. It's coming soon.
I give myself at least two more years.
Oh, you're generous.
So I wanted Mike on with us today because we're doing something a little different.
We're not going to talk about a specific person or conflict like we normally do.
Instead, we're going to have a theme.
And that theme is people who just cannot stay in one place for very long and always ended up as Nazis.
Some of these people are well known, but some of them really aren't.
And one of them has to do with a pretty important person
from Mike's birth country of Taiwan
or the Republic of China.
I don't mean to offend you, Mike.
No, no offense taken.
It depends on which economy is doing better
is which country I claim to be.
So today, I'm going to say
Republic of china is
pretty good okay uh but before we jump over to asia we are going to talk about uh a northern
european country that apparently has a conspiracy theory on the internet now that says it does not
exist and that is finland what yeah have you heard that one is it like finland doesn't exist
people actually think an entire country doesn't exist i don't know if it's real it might be one
of the stupid like people believe the earth is flat just because they want to be like
contrary to everybody else i don't like it's a reddit thing but at the same time at the same
time like president trump came from fucking 4chan so these things have real impacts yeah they seem to
pick up steam real quick it's like it's like shit picking up steam down a sewer and then
eventually impacting the water supply somewhere that's how i feel like is a good analogy for
what's happening yeah yeah i think they just call that flint oh yeah that one hits close to home
there yeah that's why i live in washington now where I can just be poisoned from the Boeing plant instead of the city.
Oh, so getting away from it.
Yeah.
Back on target here.
The first person we're talking about is a guy named Laurie Allen Torney.
Laurie Torney was born in Valpuri, Finland, in 1919 to a ship captain father and a homemaker mother.
Now, he was born with an interesting part of Finnish history.
About one year removed from the end of World War I as well as the Finnish Civil War as they broke away from the dying Russian Empire who was caught in the throw of the Bolshevik Revolution and the Russian Civil War.
Interestingly enough, Finland actually elected a king and then attempted to stand up a kingdom before all those came crashing down in less than a year um and that's the the the situation that
he was born in um and torney himself was renowned across his hometown for being something of a
natural-born athlete and even trained with a future boxing gold medalist named sten stuvio
which sounds like a gold medal boxing game.
This sounds like somebody that Rocky would fight.
Yeah, absolutely.
It sounds kind of like royalty, too.
It sounds like he should be fighting with a crown.
Yeah, yes.
King of the ring.
Yes.
It seemed that no matter what Torney picked up,
he would be better at it than just about everybody else.
He was probably like the
shithead you went to school with that you fucking hated like if you got a c on a test this dude got
an a he had a leatherman jacket he'd fuck he had frosted tips oh god yeah he fucked your girlfriend
he he he was the guy that nobody liked but everybody wanted to be effectively and that's
something that he would be good at like his entire life which makes him
even more like makes me hate him even more yeah i used to secretly hate those type of guys but i
hate them much more openly now it's just the stain has grown throughout the years yeah yeah because
they end up having jobs that impact your everyday life and make you hate them even more exactly
they've got it all yeah and you know they don't have to worry about losing their
apartment uh after so after graduating school he joined the finnish civil guard which actually got
its start as the in this finnish civil war as an anti-communist militia uh this would kind of
impact torny's life uh as you'll find out um it was known as the white guard like their white army
anti-communist friends bordering in bordering Russia.
Post-war, however, nobody's really sure what their job was.
They weren't a reserve or a national guard.
So instead, they just hung around and organized sporting events like some kind of weird ass militant YMCA.
This guard was so unorganized actually they actually made them buy everything
uh themselves to include their own rifle like you just showed up one day with nothing and they gave
you nothing like well come back when you have money kid oh god yeah uh eventually though torney
came of age and enlisted in the finnish regular army, joining the 4th Independent Jaeger Infantry Battalion in 1939.
Generally, Jaeger at the time was a catch-all term
for light infantry and scouts and things like that.
Okay.
He did small unit stuff.
Like most people, he was probably expecting to do his national service in peace,
but instead the Soviet Union invaded a year later to start the Winter War.
So he doesn't
have good luck uh he probably wanted to use a gi bill too and get out and go to college yeah
got stuck got stuck in the middle of a war it sounds like a familiar story yeah and unfortunately
for him the finnish government extended his enlistment contract indefinitely once russia once Russia invaded. Yeah, that's a tough one. He got Finnish stop
lost.
Torni found himself smack
dab in the middle of the invasion around the
Lagoda Lake area of Karelia,
which is like the whole part that
the Soviet Union wanted.
There's a
single Finnish division stationed there, and
they found themselves outnumbered nearly five to one.
Oh, no.
And as something that would become
pretty common during the Winter War,
the numbers really didn't matter.
Torni and his Finns
totally fucked up the Soviets in every
single way.
Torni himself led
to the
surrounding and destruction of an entire
Soviet Army division, which would actually go on to be one of the Finnish tactics of the war. uh this to the surround surrounding and destruction of an entire soviet army division
which would actually go on to be one of the finished tactics of the war um the fast light
finished forces which didn't really have any heavy weaponry to speak of would pick apart the massive
slow-moving columns of the red army before surrounding and destroying it bit by bit like
kind of breaking it up into small pockets and taking them on one at a time that's kind of like guerrilla warfare yeah effectively and uh there's there's actually
like an added anecdote of they would purposely go out of their way to make life for the soviet
troops miserable like they would target their kitchens and stuff in the field so they'd have
nothing to eat and then they would freeze to death uh as they blew up their their like closed
depots and stuff.
And I kind of wish they had blown up our kitchen when we were deployed together.
I think we could have gotten out of some food poisoning.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But we would have significantly less energy drinks, which would have been a problem.
I don't know how I would have survived without rivets. Yeah.
They're the fuel that actually led the war, not JPA.
Exactly.
Torney was recognized for his actions and given a battlefield promotion and then sent off to Officers Training Academy.
He graduated as a second lieutenant.
Unfortunately for the young Torney, who was really only good at war, the Finns signed a peace deal to end the Winter War before he graduated and could return to battle.
That's when things got weird though uh the fins during world war ii made some strange allies and one of those was
nazi germany um and it wasn't because they were fascists although that can be argued that uh
manor heim was kind of fashy uh it was more of a defense thing um it's fascism light yeah uh like diet fascism finland knew the
soviet union was going to attack them again and the only people in the neighborhood that wanted
to help them against the soviets was nazi germany so it was it was an alliance of self-defense
i see is that kind of like an enemy of my enemies my friend type deal right and you know that would
be underlined significantly
more in a couple years which we'll talk about um and then they briefly go to war against each other
also so um oh man but one of those things that uh that they did uh to become closer was like an
officer's exchange program um and during that piece torny was part of that he traveled to vienna
austria for seven weeks
and began training with the waffen ss he would officially gain the rank of unterstrumpf fewer
which is like the ss version of second lieutenant um and this this wasn't like um ceremonial he was
officially commissioned as a waffen ss officer and. And an official picture exists of him in the Death's Head uniform.
Oh, man.
You can't live that down.
Yeah.
You probably shouldn't be able to live that down.
That's crazy.
So what happened next?
So the peace between the two countries
would only be about 15 months.
After the Germans launched Operation Barbarossa,
the invasion of Russiaussia for people not
aware uh finland uh decided to join in uh because they wanted to recapture the territory they lost
in the winter war uh so they invaded as well their goal was to recapture karelia a province
they are forced to cede in exchange for peace um and it was kind of like a world war one piece. It was so brutal that,
um,
uh,
it,
war was inevitable.
Crayola was 30% of the Finnish economy.
So there's no way they could live that down.
Um,
and this is now known as the continuation war because there was such a pause
between the two wars.
They might as well just,
you know,
blend them into one.
Uh,
of course,
uh, T tourney's individual
unit uh which was you can't necessarily call them special forces they were they were light
infantry but they were kind of they operate in small unit tactics guerrilla war type stuff um
but it was what they were good at um they were they were so devastating to the soviet army
that the red army placed a bounty of three million Finnish marks on his head.
The closest converter I could find, because the Finnish mark doesn't exist anymore and hasn't for some time, equals to be about a half million dollars.
That's a lot of rubles.
For some random Finnish second lieutenant.
Yeah, that's a lot of rubles right there.
You must have pissed somebody off.
He was actually eventually awarded
the Mannerheim Cross, which is the highest
award in the Finnish army.
So it's their medal of honor.
This officially made him a knight.
Oh, now he's
actually a real team now.
Eventually, though, this war would end
as well. The Moscow Armistice
was signed between the Soviets and the Finns in 1944.
Again, the Armistice wasn't super nice to Finland, but it was better than being invaded by the entire post-German Red Army, which is now no longer being destroyed by purges, fueled by Lenz leases.
Now they're fully mechanized you
don't want to fight that red army it's a completely different red army than the winter war yeah um
a part of the armistice was the expulsion of all german forces from finnish land
um obviously the germans weren't really keen on that and they refused to leave
um for good reason i mean they owned a flank of Russia effectively, not that the Germans were going to be able to invade again.
But, you know, there could be a thorn in their side.
Yeah, of course.
So with the Germans refusing to leave, the Finns launched another war, this one against the Germans.
And it was called the Lapland War to kick forcibly kick the germans out um after the wonder if he had to take off his uh
ss waffen uniform when they finally declared war again you know nobody really seemed to mind that
um uh torny fought against the germans too uh which is which will become uh ironic very quickly
here in about a year and a half um after the lapland war ended in 1945 uh torny and most of the rest of the finnish army was demobilized uh is also part of the armistice
which kind of seems like a trap to me but the soviets left fins alone
um good yeah yeah um and but 20 wasn't done uh you see, whether it be through weird, twisted loyalty to the SS or because he hated the Soviets this much, he skipped Finland and rejoined the SS in 1945 to fight near Schwere, Germany.
And if you notice that the date there, this is pretty much just about the end of the war.
He surrendered to American forces in June.
So he,
he really only fought with this,
with the SS for a couple months.
Um,
he was placed in a British POW camp,
which he then quickly escaped and ran back to Finland.
Um,
that'll be another claim where he claimed to be finished once again.
Yes.
Yeah.
He's,
he's finished of convenience.
Um, the small problem though, is he was a literal card carrying nazi now and that was illegal as fucking finland and that this actually wasn't illegal before uh again because they were allies
but part of the armistice with the soviets was uh like you have to a make the communist party illegal again and and b get
rid of all the fascists which included people who trained with the trained and joined the ss so that
meant um 20 attorney guy had to go yeah that meant 20 was quickly arrested and put on trial for
treason um now normally when you think of this in history, like he was put on trial for treason.
Um, this is normally where I say something like, and then he was shot or, and then he was hung.
Um, but he wasn't, there's no, no happy ending to this story.
Uh, no.
Uh, instead he was sent to just six years in prison.
Yeah.
So like, I've seen people get, get longer charges for like a bag of weed.
That's insane.
Yeah.
I mean, this is... It kind of speaks that the Finns really didn't care about getting rid of all the Nazi sympathizers.
They were just doing it to appease the Soviets.
But since this is Tony we're talking about, and he just escaped the POW camp, he escaped prison again.
Nice.
But he was caught this time and sent back to prison a second time
i i've got to be wondering like how is he getting out of these prison camps
does he have some sort of special skill is he people got to reevaluate when he escapes prison
like the second time yeah they're in prison they're doing it wrong obviously um he i don't
know he's just fucking crafty man and and you have to realize torny is like
almost a household name in finland he's a war hero oh okay so he probably had some help oh
gotcha and uh because of those two things um he was actually given a presidential pardon in 1948
uh so they kind of forgave him for the whole treason thing. He got off scot-free.
Not quite.
Even though he got a presidential pardon, he was still kind of frowned on for effectively joining Finland's enemies. Because the Finns lost thousands of people fighting in the Lapland War, which then he went and joined the Nazis.
So he wasn't really liked much after that.
And like many Nazis post World War Two, he ran to Latin America where he ran to several of his army buddies.
Oh, boy.
Yeah.
He went to Brazil and like a lot of people who went to like Argentina or whatever.
He went to Brazil.
Apparently, it's it's more agreeable to the Finnish war criminals.
It's more agreeable to the Finnish war criminals.
Apparently, the Latin life wasn't for him, however, because he quickly went and got a job on a boat called the MS Skagen.
And once it was in the Gulf of Mexico, he quickly jumped overboard and swam to shore in Florida.
This is ending up to be like that show Prison Break. It gets dumber because he actually, from Florida, he hitchhiked his way up to New York and worked in New York as an undocumented immigrant for quite some time.
Wow.
And in 1954, he enlisted in the U.S. Army.
So there is a provision at the time called the Lodge-Philbinbin act which allowed for foreign nationals to join the u.s military um now the the act was effectively uh
not necessarily like it wasn't in the text but it was meant for people from eastern europe to join
the military uh because this is you know height of the Cold War type shit and
the idea of a war against the
Soviet Union is very, very, very real.
So they wanted something
of an American foreign legion made out
of all these satellite states to be like
the liberating army.
So they wanted the inside scoop on these guys.
Right. They needed people who spoke
the language. They needed people who knew the cultures
and the customs and everything.
Torni was none of those things. And he actually should have been strictly barred from from joining through the Philbin Act.
Now, he got through on a loophole and that was the act forbade German nationals or countries involved in the Marshall Plan from enlisting.
This is for the sole purpose.
They didn't want to accidentally recruit Nazis.
Now, Torni was never technically given German citizenship.
And due to the way Finland negotiated their way out of World War II,
and Finland wasn't part of the Marshall Plan,
he was exempt from both of these clauses.
And citizenship was promised to all of these enlistees after five years of
service.
It was kind of,
yeah,
it was kind of like,
uh,
the French foreign Legion.
You get French citizenship after five years of service.
Um,
okay.
Just to be safe though.
So nobody caught on to who he was.
Uh,
he changed his name to Larry Thorne.
Wow.
Um,
there's a lot of people who are listening right now who have never heard of
hornyny but the
name probably piqued their interest because he's something of a green beret legend uh which he
probably doesn't yeah which he probably he probably doesn't deserve and we'll go into that um and in
case you're wondering if this lodge philbenack sounds like a really good way for immigrants to
get american citizenship well it expired in 1959 it It was never resigned. So, no, it doesn't exist anymore.
So let me get this straight.
The last uniform you put on was a WAP and SS uniform,
and then the following uniform was a Green Beret?
Well, he was a basic infantry guy at first.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, and there's no saying that the U.s military did not know 20s passed um okay the
wartime oss or the precursor of the modern cia have been tracking his x points since his service
in the winter war they knew that who this guy was okay um his official u.s army record even
mentions his time as an officer in the Waffen-SS. Wow.
Now... Imagine that showing up on your DD-214,
just your time spent in the SS.
Yeah.
Nothing follows.
Now, there's a good reason why I bring this up.
This is because the U.S. government labeled the SS
a criminal organization during the Nuremberg trials in 1945.
The only people exempt from this label
were SS conscripts,
of which there were hundreds of thousands,
from 1943 onwards.
Not only was Torni not a conscript,
he was a foreign volunteer,
which normally meant a death sentence
in battle if he was captured.
Right, makes sense.
Yeah.
There's actually an SS unit
made out of French volunteers
called SS Charlemagne.
And they actually were one of the last units
to fall apart during the defense of Berlin
because they knew what would happen
if they were captured.
Oh, they're all going to be killed.
Yeah, they knew they weren't going to be
sent to a pow
camp the french would get it we're gonna kill them if they went back home and most of i think
like out of the 60 survivors half of them were executed by the french government so like yikes
yeah that's normally what happened from friend from foreign volunteers um but the us has balls
deep in the cold war and they had all kinds kinds of Nazi war criminals in the military and the government.
I mean, the entire rocket program that we sent people to space on was Nazi science.
So we weren't shy about this.
We just needed somebody who had a decent record of killing communists.
And that was Torney's favorite hobby.
As Torney was incredibly highly trained soldier already
he quickly rose above everybody else and joined the u.s special forces
um like the ss he was quickly sent to officer's candidate school and became an
officer in the third military of his career wow yeah
now if you were to think uh if you look at the time, where do you think he's going to apply his trade next?
I mean, he started in Finland and then he worked for the Nazis and now he's a Green Beret.
So, I don't know, space?
That's the last frontier.
Well, before that, he was sent to Vietnam in 1963.
Fuck off.
He spent his time training
Montagnard anti-communist militias,
which was the original Green Beret purpose,
and found himself caught in the middle of Tien Bien.
And in true Nazi
action movie fashion, he was wounded twice, but
was integral to the camp not being overran.
He was awarded the Bronze Star
for his service and immortalized in the famed
Robin Moore book, The Green Berets.
What? That was him? Yeah. Now, they change hisized in the famed Robin Moore book, The Green Berets. What? That was him?
Yeah.
Now, they change his name in the book,
but there's a very Finnish man
in the book with a different name that's
very obviously Larry Thorne.
Oh, okay.
And this is where things get dark.
Now, I have to point out...
Things have not gotten dark already?
No. So, there is no evidence.
I keep
calling him or criminal but that's because technically all SS people are
war criminals they're criminal organization so there is no evidence
during his service with the SS or the Finnish Army that he took part in any
atrocities none there's no evidence so he quickly made up for that in Vietnam
oh boy so on his second tour in Vietnam. Oh, boy.
So on his second tour in Vietnam in 1965, he played a founding role in a unit that a lot of people may have heard of.
That is the Military Assistance Command Vietnam Studies and Observation Group or MACV SOG.
Oh, man.
Now, this unit existed before Torney got there, but Torney literally wrote the book of their tactics and procedures that's right one of the most famed
special forces units in american history was
fine-tuned by a nazi
oh fuck uh while
like i said he took in part of
no ss war crimes that we are aware of
he made up for all this by
being one of the founding minds of
the phoenix program
so the phoenix program i'm glad you asked mike it is probably one of the largest black eyes on
america for the entire vietnam war oh shit it's got to be pretty bad then so the phoenix program
was a ci-led mission during the vietnam war that was meant to cut off the political support for
the north vietnamese government in the vietcong in south vietnam they did this through targeted killings
and massacres torture was widespread and it was described by author douglas valentine as quote
rape gang rape rape using eels snakes or hard objects and then rape followed by murder electric
shock rendered by attaching wires like rape they just that rape. Oh, it gets worse.
Oh, man.
Electric shock rendered
by attaching wires to
the genitals or other
sensitive parts of the
body like the tongue.
And there is a water
treatment and the
airplane in which the
prisoner's arms were
tied behind their back
and the rope looped
over a hook on the
ceiling and suspended
the prisoner in midair
after which he or she
was beaten, beaten
with rubber hoses and whips
and used for police dogs to maul oh my god um this was so the whole point of the program was
obviously the regular regular army was fighting um the vietcong and the cia thought well the
vietcong wouldn't exist without support so the cia attacked the support channels which is semantics for saying they attack the
civilians who supported the vietcong right and this included all like the vietcong uh
communist leaders in the area all the the village chiefs things like that um by the end we're trying
to win any hearts and minds here no no this was like straight up um like the the closest parallel to
this we can see uh in in other wars recently is like the soviet war in afghanistan where they
just thought uh since the taliban or it wasn't taliban time but since the mujahideen drew the
vast majority of their support from the countryside we'll just kill everybody in the countryside
and that was kind of their idea effective strategy
right so by 1972 it is estimated that this program killed 80 000 people man uh yeah so
torny made up for that um war atrocities on war atrocities it's crazy yeah uh torny took part in
infiltration missions uh where he would chart out the Ho Chi Minh trail.
So it could be more easily attacked by aircraft.
Um,
and one of those missions would be his last.
In October,
1965,
Tony was aboard a South Vietnamese helicopter where it went down 25 miles
from Denang.
Rescue teams were unable to find the crash site and he was declared missing
in action.
He wasn't discovered until 1999.
Um, so he finally died, uh died uh three three militaries in and uh one phoenix program later he died doing what he loved yeah that's all that's all we can ask for uh so if you were to say um this man's
legacy do you think he's thought of well or like kind of swept over the rug?
I mean, the fact that I've never heard of this guy, I think it's kind of been swept over the rug a little bit, swept under the rug a little bit.
I can't believe that.
I hate to be the one to burst your bubble, Mike.
So Major Larry Thorne is buried in Arlington National Cemetery in Section 60, Tombstone No. 8136.
He also enjoys something of a heroic reputation to this day and was recently prayed by some shitty vet borough companies on Facebook.
He is also honored in the form of the Larry Thorne Award, which is awarded to the best special forces detachment.
Wow.
Also, right before we went on air i was curious if i
could find anything from like an official military website uh about him yeah and the u.s european
military command official website has an article entitled the ideal green beret that's about him
let me guess they don't they don't list all of his other accomplishments before the green beret
though uh you know the interesting part is they don't shy away from it they say yep he was
definitely in the german army uh now a lot of people like to say the german army rather than
the ss but he was not he was not in the wehrmacht like our next two people
no he was up there yeah i'm gonna go on a limb here and say, if a photo exists of you in full Waffen SS dress regalia,
you should probably not be celebrated,
given a spot in Arlington,
and given a spot in the Vietnam War Memorial,
which he also has.
You shouldn't even get likes on Instagram with a picture like that.
That's crazy.
Yeah, and I really wish I could find this shitty vet bro company.
They try to make a t-shirt out of them or something.
And I couldn't find it.
I think they finally realized they're...
I don't know.
It's probably their brand.
But Sofrep, if I don't know if you've ever heard of them.
Sofrep.
They're a really, really shitty Vetbro news...
They like to call themselves a news agency.
They were the website that first published the GoPro
footage of the Special Forces soldiers
being killed in Niger.
They still openly
praise him quite a bit.
There's a lot of kooky
vet groups out there.
Don't praise
Nazis.
Don't praise Nazis. A lot of the support for
current day Nazisis is coming
from those you know right wing groups that right they're kind of fishy yeah yeah there's there's a
lot of dog whistling going on there like there's a reason why you keep praising some dude that was
in the ss man yeah that shouldn't that shouldn't be happening in 2018 yeah yeah you would think
that um so that is the the tale of larry thorne and our next story brings us
all the way to korea uh to a tiny peasant rail yard worker named ying king jong i probably
fucked that up uh yeah that's pretty good that's pretty close i'll take it um so yang was born in
the japanese protectorate of korea sometime sometime around 1920 because records weren't kept really good in Japanese colonial territories.
The record of his life is pretty spotty.
Also, it helps that he was declared dead like 50 years before he died.
But we'll get into that.
Okay.
Yang was born to a desperately poor family and as such went through uh to northern manchuria to work in the
japanese railway industry uh the japanese thought their korean subjects were uh subhuman uh so life
was pretty terrible and most of the time he was not paid nor was he allowed to leave once he got
there so things aren't looking good for yang uh and he is hardly an adult at this point i think
he's like 15 or 16 that's a hard knock life right there yeah
uh but uh just because he was a subhuman korean doesn't mean he wasn't too good to die for the
emperor because in 1938 yang like tens of thousands of other ethnic koreans was forced
in the military service with the kwantung army uh now the kwantung Army it was technically an army group of the Imperial
Japanese Army
kind of
they weren't ran that way
in reality it was a totally independent army
being ran by its commanders like they were
like the Emperor themselves
they would act
they were
the army itself attempted multiple coups against
civilian government in Japan in an attempt to return the emperor to absolute power.
Some of these were actually during World War II themselves.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, they had very little accountability.
Yeah, so Dan Carlin did a pretty good overview of the Kwantung Army in a recent episode of his show.
But it is really weird.
It's like if a random army battalion in the u.s army today just
decided to completely run itself and start its own wars and everything that was the quantum army
jesus and they're trying to they're trying to install the uh the emperor back back in is that
what you're saying right like the the emperor existed uh already like this is the showa age
so emperor hirohito is is already there uh he had, like, there's a prime minister.
There's a whole dite of the parliament that they have.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, he wasn't really in charge as much as a lot of people like to think.
He was influential, certainly, but the Japanese emperor was not an absolute ruler.
Okay.
He was kind of used by a lot of people.
Yeah, well well more powerful
than the queen he's like okay uh i'll give him one step above the queen okay but he absolutely
knew like complete side note here he definitely knew about all the japanese war crimes during
world war ii he was just given a pass uh the army actually so one of the founding reasons that started
the
second Sino-Japanese war
which would also eventually
fold into World War II
was the takeover
of Manchuria where they would
install a puppet empire
called the Empire of Manchukuo
that happened just before world war ii
the kwantung army did all of that on their own without even talking to the government
wow uh so they also installed several of their commanders in high positions of the japanese
government um there's a guy named shishiro itagaki who became minister of defense pretty much just
based on the fact that he was a Kwantung Army commander and
another guy that more people probably heard of
named Hideki Tojo as prime minister
so
yeah they have some pull
yeah
in case you were wondering what kind
of terrible shit army
happened in Korea that these
guys did both those guys were hung for war
crimes so
it's not a good army it's not a good start there no um so yang was caught in the middle of
all this uh and this is despite the fact he did not speak any japanese whatsoever
uh japanese military basic training at the time was so ruthless it was actually blamed for a lot
of the cruelty they showed people later on. They fought throughout history.
Makes sense.
Yeah.
Training was framed in like the 18th century Prussian style, where skill was secondary to individual soldiers discipline.
And they got that through frequent and severe beatings for the smallest problems.
Jesus. uh i imagine this problem uh or this kind of like problem solving would be difficult for a young korean person who doesn't understand the orders being screamed at him yeah he probably doesn't
even understand why he's getting beat yeah so you can imagine that yang had the dog shit beat out of
him quite a bit absolutely yeah uh within the japanese military the kwantung army had something of a reputation
of being nearly unbeatable on the field of battle um this had to do with them not really fighting
any army of note until uh they ran smack dab into the sleeping superpower of the soviet red army
um now the two sides were not actually at war uh but the border between the Manchurian puppet empire and the Soviet Union is largely
uncharted, and both
kind of disagreed where it began
and ended, so they shot at each other quite a
bit over the border.
While regular nations
and, you know,
the governments would probably want to
talk this whole thing out, the
Kuantan Army really only believed in fighting
as a form of discipline and diplomacy, so they decided to try to push the thing out. The Kwantung Army really only believed in fighting as a form of discipline and
diplomacy. So they decided to
try to push the Soviets out.
They sound like the original Spartans.
No diplomacy, just
ass kicking. Yeah,
except they wore clothes
in 300. And they were significantly
less cool because there's a whole bunch of poor peasant
kids who didn't speak the language being drafted.
And significantly less oiled bodies. Yeah, you would hope so because there's a whole bunch of poor peasant kids who didn't speak the language being drafted. And significantly less oiled bodies.
Yeah, you would hope so because it's really cold up there.
The oil would just freeze to them.
Exactly.
Now, there's a small reason why the Kuantan Army thought it was a good idea to pick on the Soviets.
The local NKVD commander actually defected over to the Japanese side and told them that the Red Army was completely falling apart due to all the political purges that were going on.
So this is around the same time that Stalin got really paranoid and started shooting pretty much every lieutenant who looked at him wrong.
So there wasn't really a lot of command and control in the Red Army.
They had several small clashes before they finally threw down in a major battle.
Now, reminder, this whole
time, they're not actually at war.
This devolved into the Battle
of Khalkhin Gol, which
the Soviet Red Army
was joined by the Mongolian Red Army,
and they fought the Kuantan Army in a
border conflict that involved north of
100,000 men of both sides.
That's a shit ton of people.
Yeah.
And the Red Army was
they had their issues, but they were also being
commanded by Soviet legend Georgi Zhukov
who would go on to take Berlin
a couple years later. So they had
a pretty decent commander in charge.
So
it turned out
the Kwantung Army was not ready for fighting an actual army.
And what amounted to a total defeat, the army lost around 10,000 people killed, another 8,000 wounded and 3,000 captured.
Now, Japanese military doctrine completely forbade surrender of any kind.
So if you surrendered, like those 3 3 000 people who were captured they just told
your family that you died to save them to any desire what the fuck yeah like yep he's dead
and like that's it uh so that's why uh yang was declared dead uh because he was uh captured he
was one of the 3 000 pow's uh thankfully for yang however he was captured when the two sides weren't
at war as opposed to being
captured a few years later when it probably would have been a death sentence because the soviets
were worse to their pows and virtually anybody else um yeah yeah instead he was just sent to
a siberian gulag which is somehow better i guess he got to keep his life yeah and slightly better
and he was used to awful slave labor because he worked for the Japanese before this.
So like there was probably nobody more prepared for a gulag.
Oh, he's already used to the beatings.
I mean, that's that's part of his daily routine now.
Yeah.
Just substitute in people screaming Russian at him and Japanese.
And he's he didn't move.
He's still where he was.
It's not like he understood either people anyway.
Yeah, and that's where he stayed
until 1942, so he did some time.
Jesus.
That's when the Red Army came calling.
Now, the Red Army had all but collapsed
in the face of Stalinist purges
and the German operation of Operation Barbarossa,
so they needed pretty much any warm body
they could get their hands on.
That's where Yang came into their plans plans and he was given a rifle,
a different uniform and shoved off to the front line again.
Oh boy.
If he disagreed,
it didn't really matter.
The only,
yeah,
it doesn't say whether he was like,
cool,
sign me up or he understood what was happening again.
Like I'm being given a rifle again.
I don't understand.
Oh yeah.
Just for a second imagine
how fucking confused this dude was first he was uh first by the japanese uh he now he's being
yelled at by some soviet commissar in a second language he doesn't understand yeah so wait i've
been a prisoner this entire time with my daily meetings and now you're gonna give me a gun
yeah okay okay all right let's see how this plays out yeah and you know yang was one
of probably hundreds of thousands of people forced into service this way uh like there was germans
who end up there was actually um an interesting story of an american who ended up fighting with
the red army uh which is not included in this episode because the episode already got too long
but yeah he was uh wounded and put in a POW camp, which was then liberated by the Soviets.
And then he joined the Soviet Red Army
for like six months.
And then he met Georgi Zhukov in a hospital
because he got wounded again
and was really curious about the guy
who spoke no Russian.
And that's when he told him his story.
And then Zhukov realized how bad that looked
and immediately sent him
to the nearest American embassy to be repatriated
so there's a happy ending
for this story at least
so much like
his time in the Red Army
or his time in the Red Army much like his time in the
Kwantung Army would be brief but once again
he would find himself in the middle of a giant meat
grinder before the end
and that was the third battle a giant meat grinder before the end.
And that was the third battle of Kharkov, where the Soviets were trying everything they could to take the pressure off the encircled Stalingrad.
And what they really did was grind their armies down to about as few as one to two thousand combat effective soldiers per division.
Yeah. Which is, you know, on brand for the Soviets. The Germans
knew this and launched their push to retake
the city of Kharkov.
Yang was one of around a half million
Soviet soldiers caught in the middle of it all.
Over the course
of the next several months, almost 90,000
of them would be dead. Fighting in the
city would be brutal hand-to-hand, room-to-room
affairs that were kind of reminiscent
of what they describe in Stalingrad
where like people try to retake
the kitchen from the living room type stuff
oh shit yeah it wasn't
that the Soviet way to just throw bodies
out of problem oh yeah yeah
that was their main material
where they run out of bodies yeah
yeah and then they can just dip back into the prison
camps and because
this is the Eastern Front,
very few prisoners who were taken were kept alive.
Most of them died horrible, horrible deaths.
And if you're paying any attention,
you know who one of those prisoners who got lucky was.
Our boy Yang.
Dude, he's like a Korean version of Forrest Gump just tripping over his dick through major parts of history at this point because you have to imagine he has no idea what's going on
he's just trying to finish the race at this point yeah he's like uh now i'm getting like i don't
understand who you people are but you know you didn't shoot me so i think that means we're
friends yeah yeah just to keep running.
Yeah.
Uh,
and that was how Yang was, uh,
drafted into his third army of the war.
Jesus Christ.
Uh,
so,
uh,
there's a reason for that.
Um,
by 1943,
the Nazis would take almost anybody to get their hands on,
uh,
not to mention former Soviets into the army who would be like propaganda wins.
They would be framed as like free Soviet men wanting to liberate their former country from the despot Stalin.
No one realized that one of their, you know, captured Soviet guys looks suspiciously Asian.
Well, that's the thing is there's a lot of people in the Soviet Union who were Asian, like Central Asian Republics like Kyrgyzstan.
Yeah.
Oh, I see.
Yeah.
I mean, you remember Manas.
I mean, I'm not saying that Koreans and Kyrgyz look the same, but to an untrained racist Nazi, they totally do.
To a Chinese eye, when I was in Manas, I was confused as fuck too.
I was like, what are my people doing here i don't what part of china is this yeah and they probably just expect
like they probably just thought he was some central asian soviet guy and not a korean um
i gotcha yeah and it's not like i didn't know how to speak fucking korean so there's like whatever
go into this unit and that's where he went.
So the Germans founded what they called the Eastern Battalions or the Ostruppen.
Ying served alongside people from pretty much every nation of the Soviet bloc.
Most of them joined the Wehrmacht to escape horrible POW camps.
He was in the Wehrmacht, not the SS.
There was several people there.
I mean, there was a lot of Eastern European people
who were drafted into the SS,
but the vast majority of them are from Latvia, Estonia,
Ukraine, stuff like that.
Most of the Asian-looking dudes were put in the Ostropen.
Okay.
All of those people were probably really confused
when a Korean showed up because he didn't speak
any of their languages.
And there was actually another
type of German unit that foreigners
went into called the Ostlegions.
And there was actually
an Armenian legion, a Georgian
legion, shit like that.
That sounds meaner.
That sounds meaner for some reason.
When you slap Legion at the end of anything, it sounds bad.
I'm going to dent this Legion.
That sounds awful.
They probably work at Gitmo.
They probably give you cavities.
Those legions were made up
exclusively of volunteers from certain
countries, so that's why he was put into like the kaleidoscope units,
which is interesting because that means those battalions were integrated.
Right.
Which actually makes the Nazis one step more progressive than the U.S.
Army at the time.
The U.S.
Army was was not very progressive at this time.
Oh, no. Like like if you one of the most highly decorated uh units of the war was a unit made of specifically japanese americans uh because
nobody trusted them enough to serve in other units really yeah and they were sent to europe
rather than the pacific theater for that exact reason um well because they thought they couldn't
trust them when they got too close to
home.
That's bananas.
You have to think where did the vast majority of those recruits come from?
Internment camps.
Uh,
okay.
Yeah.
You got a good point.
Yeah.
Uh,
a lot of them,
uh,
were like,
they're,
they're,
there's pictures of them like going home on leave,
but they were only allowed to go back to the internment camps.
Yeah. It's, it's terrible. Uh uh and at the same time of course like black people weren't allowed to serve alongside white people in combat until the korean war oh man so yeah i've almost forgotten how
racist we are oh man yeah i mean like they were ordering all black units of the U.S. Army during World War One to charge trench lines in the minutes leading up to the armistice that everybody knew was coming.
Sounds about right. Yeah. Yeah. That sounds about right.
The U.S. Army doesn't have a great history on this. But so when Yang was forced into this unit.
So, you know, like I said, he wasn't in the ss i guess he
has won over on torny from earlier uh the nazis tended to know an army full of pows uh from the
eastern front probably should not be sent to the eastern front so they shipped them all off to the
western front uh and that is how yang force gumped his way into another major battle in history. D-Day. Yang was stationed on
Omaha Beach.
This guy's luck, man.
It sounds like my love life.
Yeah. When
American troops landed
on Omaha Beach on June 6th of
1944, Yang and his
battalion buddies were some of the
tens of thousands of German soldiers dug in against
them. Yang's unit broke and ran,
however, and Yang was once again
captured and became a POW.
This time he was captured by the
101st Airborne Division.
Oh, the Flyboys.
Okay. Yeah. Now this is where
we have to come out and say that there is some
contention of the existence of Yang.
This contention
pretty much only comes from the
south korean government uh there might be a good reason for this like it's not cool to accept that
like um your countrymen went off and fought for the nazis but uh they did this claiming he doesn't
exist yes uh they did a whole documentary where they said, nope, Yang didn't exist. But at the same time, they also made a movie of his life called My Way.
So they claim to have no record of his existence, which makes sense as one South Korea did not exist at the time.
And the Kwantung Army wouldn't either because they said he died three years and two armies ago.
So why would they think Yang existed when Yang died at the Battle of Calc and Gull?
Right, right, of course.
Okay.
So, there's just a Yang corpse in that army now.
Right.
Zombie.
Now, we do have some proof.
Since he was captured by the U.S. Army, who is very good at taking a lot of notes,
U.S. Army Officer Robert Brewer from from e company second battalion 506 infantry regiment
processed four strange asian looking german pows um brewer noted that three of them spoke german
and russian explained them they are in fact turkmen and they don't know where the other
dude came from we can't talk to him eventually they found out that he spoke Korean and another soldier would translate for him.
And then they shoved his ass into a POW camp.
Of course, as you do.
Yeah.
Eventually, Yang was transferred to a camp in the U.S. where he'd finally be allowed to wait out the end of the war.
The U.S. Army did not draft Yang.
It turns out I'm partially convinced that the entirety of world war ii was just yang
fighting himself in various different uniforms and not understanding a single word just that
entire time not having not a clue what's happening like i'm 99 sure he fought the entire war without
even knowing who adolf hitler was yeah absolutely it's like oh i'm just i'm giving a gun i'm pointed off in that direction
i guess i'm just going to do that or die yeah um and because the u.s didn't want to send him back
to korea for various reasons going at the time i was pretty much a death sentence sending him back
to south korea now during the partition going on there between the the red north and the american
supported south so they let him stay in the u.s
um he got released from a pow camp and settled in illinois which might be the biggest fuck you
of this entire story really like why illinois like imagine surviving nazi pow camps russian
gulags and the japanese kwantung army only to be like, yeah, you can live in fucking Illinois and nowhere else.
Wait, they
told them they could only live in Illinois?
That seems like
cruel and unusual punishment.
Well, I know and
remember it, I could be wrong, that
when the U.S. allowed POWs to
settle in the U.S., they kept
pretty rigid track of them and didn't allow
them to move very freely.
Oh, okay. That makes sense. That tracks.
He finally died in 1992.
I'm personally a little surprised
that he wasn't forced to fight in every
succeeding American war between World War II
and his death.
Like, alright, Yang, off to Vietnam
you go. Okay, Yang, off to
fucking Iraq.
That's why we lost Vietnam. we didn't have our good luck charm
yeah and then he would end up fighting for north vietnam and things would get awkward
they would get awkward yeah you're right and that is the horribly tragic story of yang the man who
fought and you know he's noted as being the only person to fight on every single side of world war
ii um and not understand why he was doing it.
Yeah.
I mean,
yeah,
you have to think a fucking half illiterate peasant rail yard worker from
Manchuria probably did not know what was going on in Europe at the time.
And then he ended up taking part in like all of the major battles of world
war.
Like the only thing missing is that he wasn't at Stalingrad and he didn't
like fly a plane during the Battle of Britain or something.
Exactly.
It seems like a wild story.
Yeah.
And I hope he died happy knowing that all the Japanese officers who gave his life, made his life a living hell definitely died in World War Two.
And he didn't.
Yeah.
That's the ultimate fuck you surviving.
Yeah.
And that's what brings us to our final story
and back to asia to someone mike might be familiar with and that is generalissimo
chen kai shek oh boy the father of our of our country there let's see dear leader
dear leader um for people not Mike
and not familiar with Kaishak he was the
ultra nationalist some would say fascist
leader of the Chinese Nationalist
Party some people
would say or Kuman
Tang or they also call it the KMT
I don't know Mike
you'd probably be the best presenter
here was the KMT are the KMT still fascist?
Well, the party still exists in its current form in Taiwan.
They were part of an election recently for the presidency,
and they are the political party that's mostly associated with the Taiwanese independence.
And I think they just lost the last presidential election.
So the political landscape is kind of changing in Taiwan.
A lot of the younger people in Taiwan want to be a part of China, and a lot of older people don't.
But everybody knows who Chiang Kai-shek is.
but everybody knows who Chiang Kai-shek is.
Yeah.
I mean,
it's,
it's interesting that,
well,
I mean that,
that divide of not wanting to be part of China, but also wanting to be part of China is,
is it more rooted in reality that they know if they declare like unilateral
independence,
that China will blow them out of the fucking sea?
Or is it that they still hope that one day that they'll retake China?
Um, I think at this point with how how big China is getting, has gotten,
there's no chance of, you know, the quote unquote legitimate government,
and I'll claim that for life, you know, to ever regain power.
And I think at this point, it's probably best to just cut our losses
and, you know, try to assimilate ourselves into one of the most
dominant economies of the current century. And also in particular, in recent years,
Taiwan used to be able to count on America as an ally to protect us from Chinese aggression.
And ever since 2016, we haven't felt like that we could rely on our American ally in that way.
So the landscape is changing a little bit where we're seeing less Western support.
And we're trying a lot of the younger people in Taiwan are leaning towards China,
that support that we used to get from America.
And is there like free movement between the two or is, uh, or is China not so happy with that?
Um, as of a couple of years ago, they had opened up tourism between the two countries for the
first time. And I think that was back in 2012. Uh, I think nowadays there, there is, um,
immigration between the two, but I don't know if it's completely open yet.
I'm not sure about that.
It's been a couple of years since I've been back.
Interesting.
So we aren't going to be talking about Chiang Kai-shek directly.
Instead, we're going to be talking about his son, Chiang Wei-ko.
Which is going to be interesting that I think Mike can explain here a little bit.
Ko was actually born in Tokyo to a Japanese woman and a Chinese father.
Who was not actually Chiang Kai-shek himself.
Rather, he was some dude named Chai Tao.
Tao was having an affair while the Kuomintang was exiled to Japan by the Biaoyang government.
And he didn't want to bring his side piece kids home with him and ruin his marriage.
So he just kind of handed them off to Sheck.
What?
Now, do you think a half Japanese adopted kid would have a hard time growing up in Taiwan?
A pretty hard time.
I don't care.
If someone handed a kid to me
and was like, he's your problem now, I would not
be like, okay.
I would not say that. That's bananas.
Which is weird because
Chiang Kai-shek has several
actual
kids of his own.
It's weird that he would just accept somebody
else's.
And that adoption thing would be something that Ko would deny and even fist fight people about if they brought it up.
So, yeah, he handled that adoption real well.
And, like, it's really obvious that he's not Chiang Kai-shek's son.
He looks nothing like him.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I mean, to the untrained eye, maybe we might still look alike.
Well, he's very obviously Japanese.
Oh, okay. I got you.
It's a very dominant facial trait that he has that Chiang Kai-shek is distinctly missing.
I hear you. It's the eyes thing. It's all in the eyes, man.
It's a magic distinction. Go ahead.
So Ko actually had an older brother named ching uh who was sent to
moscow uh for school but it was also around the same time that uh the communist party and the
nationalist party in china were having a rift so moscow just kind of took a hostage and wouldn't
let him go home oh shit um so so he's really good at hanging on to people. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's something they,
they're,
they're good at making people disappear.
Uh,
yeah.
Time and time again.
So when co came of age,
Shaq had only one place to send his one free son for an education.
And if you've been paying attention to the episode,
you know where he's going.
And that is the German,
the German military Academy at Munichich known as the creek shul
the motherland yes and you know being a national nationalist government um chinkai
put a pretty big importance on his military military education at least as far as like
nepotism went like he wanted his kids to have the best education even though the entire uh
kumatang's military was incredibly defunct and stupid
yeah of course ku uh ko would not be one of the stupid leaders uh he would actually be one of the
best and the germans are the reason why okay i mean obviously his goal was not just for his son
to get a good education but also a modern military education he'd be able to bring home and serve the
nationalist cause he graduated at the top of his class
despite not actually knowing German
before showing up.
He kind of just taught himself.
It's a typical Asian thing.
Just going to a new school and then excelling.
Yeah, he taught himself German
while also learning in German.
It's insane.
It's such a Chinese thing to do, but go on.
He completed his basic training and attended
the elite german school of alpine warfare and earned the edelweiss sleeve insignia which is
like a small white flower uh okay it's the sign of like an elite soldier um and the only way you can
get that flower um is by climbing a mountain where it grows and it's like 10,000 feet
above sea level. Wow.
Yeah. That sounds like one of the
actual trials that like
Hercules has to go on. Yeah, it's
not easy. And that's like to the
point that when
people were like German
soldiers, even all the way through World War II,
they'd like wear the Edelweiss on their uniform.
And I think in band of brothers,
it shows,
um,
somebody like plucking one off a uniform and talking about,
I don't remember though.
Oh,
okay.
I gotcha.
Yeah.
Um,
he was also really,
really good with weapons.
Um,
as in all of his pictures,
he's wearing a German marksmanship lanyard,
also known as a shoot and sneer,
which is,
um,
not easy to get. I actually have one and it fucking sucks like i imagine i imagine it was way harder back
then it's just an overachiever it sounds like yeah by 1938 um ko was a sergeant officer's cadet
and given command of a tank uh it is around this time that Germany annexed its neighbor,
Austria.
This is actually,
yeah,
this is known as the Austrian Anschluss.
Now there's a lot to this event that we're not going to get into.
Just know that Germany was heavily involved in the Austrian Nazi movement
that also include allowing Austrians to vote in German elections,
which would eventually lead to the Nazis winning a bunch of
seats in the Reichstag. People got
assassinated. Eventually, things came to
a head, and by 1937,
people were openly talking about taking Austria
by force.
In 1938, Hitler was
demanding that power be given to the Austrian
Nazi party, or he would invade.
The Austrians would not go down
that easily and refused to appoint a Nazi
chancellor, which is how Hitler came to
power. So
Hitler went all Hitler-y and invaded them
instead.
As Hitler does.
As Hitler's do.
He'd be crazy.
On March 12, 1938,
Coe and the German army stormed
across the border to cheering crowds
of Austrians.
This looks like
a triumph of victory. All the pictures show
Austrians clapping and cheering for the German
soldiers.
It's seen as the first major test of German
power, which would lead to World War II.
In reality, it was a totally
confused clusterfuck, and German units
got lost, broke down, and ran into one another.
Yikes.
None of this sounds like the U.S. Army.
Yeah.
And, you know, none of this really mattered because the Austrian government ordered their army to not resist the German army.
Otherwise, there would probably be a lot of dead German soldiers.
Yeah.
Apparently, Coe did good enough in the middle of all this to get promoted and he
was commissioned a full lieutenant in the german
wehrmacht oh man uh he
was given a full command of an entire platoon
of tanks which i don't know about
uh 1939 that's
in modern day that's four tanks so
he was given a fair amount of responsibility
yeah and then him and his unit
were awaiting deployment to poland
where they would uh take part in the event that would actually spark World War Two.
But that wasn't in store for our boy, Ko.
Before he was given orders to mobilize, I think his dad realized his son was about to get involved with some real, real shit and then quickly recalled him to China.
And then quickly recalled him to China.
But then he took part in the Chinese fighting against Japan's invasion during World War II.
That's crazy. So he just finds out one day that my son is actually fighting a war.
Oh, no, no.
He needs to come back.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think.
It's crazy.
I don't know if he was told about the Anschluss beforehand.
Or I imagine there was significant censorship of any letters that Ko was sending back to China. I don't know if he was like told about the Anschluss beforehand or like I
am I imagine there was significant
censorship of any letters that co was sending
back to China about like an
upcoming military operation
so his dad probably didn't
realize it happened until like there's
this weird Asian guy driving a tank through
fucking Vienna like oh
that's my kid especially like your son
was no longer with us for some reason
yeah oh shit's getting real especially like your son was no longer with us for some reason yeah
oh oh shit's getting real just a coincidence i'm sure yeah uh and then and then he ended up
fighting the japanese and he was one of the the most successful nationalist commanders of the war
um he fought hilariously enough is the tanks he was using in the chinese uh war was you know m4
shermans things like that uh because yeah
they were just given tons and tons of weapons by the allies to fight the japanese
and then after the war uh the nationalist government was teetering from massive widespread
destruction of almost every layer of society from long brutal years fighting against the japanese
uh they also uh they so the Nationalists had a significantly larger military
than Mao's
communist forces.
They were also
better trained and equipped.
This has a lot to do
with the Western Allies
opening up a heavy weapons
pipeline to resist
the Japanese.
It turns out that
Ko's dad was so corrupt,
however,
that even college-educated
Chinese students,
you know,
the same people
Mao would mock
and later execute,
joined the Communists
anyway out of sheer disgust of all the problems of the Nationalist government. uh, the, you know, the same people now would mock and later execute, uh, joined the communist anyway,
out of sheer disgust of all the problems of the nationalist government.
Um,
so to make matters worse,
when the civil war did kick off,
the nationalist generals and other officers were generally promoted out of
political loyalty to Kai Shek rather than any actual skill.
Um,
uh,
yeah,
like,
like any good despotic government. Um um this loyalty to the chain of command ended
pretty much as soon as it branched away from kai shek though with subordinate leaders refusing to
listen to one another and actively backstabbing another in order to get like uh in the favor of
the party leader so it sounds very familiar actually it kind of sounds like the current
administration but yeah like it's nothing but backstabbing and political maneuvering all while attempting to fight a war and it did nothing
but completely fuck over the nationalist army yeah now that's to be said i don't think the
nationalists would have won even with the functioning military because mao was just
so good at leading a people's war not so good at governance it turns out but uh a really good
guerrilla leader um he's really good at starving people apparently yeah and making
fucking pig iron backyards and chasing sparrows around with pots and pans yeah
um this explains why ko who was a lieutenant when the war started was a general by the time it was over only a couple years later um it should be said all nepotism aside he was the one of the best
leaders in the nationalist army so while some of the the promotions were definitely nepotism
related like a lot of them were skill skill related um see taiwanese people love sending their kids to to western schools and
western academies and i didn't know that it started all the way back from the founding
father of our country that's crazy i had no idea it's a tradition now that's weird too
if you have any money at all or any sort of influence you don't let your kids go to school
in the country you live in no you don't do that you send them across the entire country and the entire planet
and you let them go to school in like germany or america or something like that is that because
do they see like taiwanese schools as not being good because i mean the general thought is asian
schools are all better than ours it's not that it, it's not that, um, Asian schools aren't good.
It's that,
um,
Western,
Western schools have more recognition.
Oh,
okay.
Uh,
like the,
the whole saving face thing is,
is very big in,
um,
in Taiwanese culture and,
and I want to say most Asian cultures.
So,
you know,
it's not necessarily about what kind of education you get.
It's about how,
how big then is the pull that is the recognition
of this of the school that you get get into and uh you know unfortunately or maybe fortunately
most of those schools are in the western part of the world so that's that's where taiwanese
people send their kids eventually interesting um yeah it's always kind of because we um in texas
we would train um and and when i was at fort knox
from time to time we would train taiwanese armor officers and stuff like that and it was always
really weird that they would come over to train on m1a1 main battle tanks when they were using like
40 year old vehicles in taiwan but it was yeah it was more of the the uh the claiming hierarchy type shit like well i
went to school in the u.s i guess it's making sense now yeah they just get to get to say that
you know they have to have that good american western training and that somehow puts them you
know head and shoulders above their peers that's's how Taiwanese people view any sort of
Western institution.
It must be good.
I don't know if that's true necessarily.
I'm a little biased when I talk about
how amazing our armor education is
but I digress.
The multiple reasons why the Nationalist Army
lost in the Chinese Civil War can be
summed up by U.S. General Barr who was a U.S. military observer for the Nationalist Army lost in the Chinese Civil War can be summed up by U.S. General Barr.
He was a U.S. military observer for the Nationalist Army who said, quote,
Their military debacles, in my opinion, can all be attributed to the world's worst leadership and many other morale-destroying factors that led to a complete loss of the will to fight.
The complete ineptness of high military leaders and widespread corruption and dishonesty throughout the armed forces could, in some measure, have been controlled and directed had the above authority and facilities been available.
So, yeah, the Nationalist Army was a bunch of shit.
So we fucked up.
We fucked ourselves up.
Yeah.
Like, I mean, I feel like that's most armies and nations led by like the great man theory like because without chen kai shek there
would have been no nationalist movement and the whole the whole party just orbited around him
and he led with charm instead of you know having actual policies yeah and he was corrupt as fuck
himself so that was kind of like one of those well well, if he can get away with it.
And it just trickled all the way down to the lowest fucking private.
I see.
I see a little bit of that happening in the Philippines right now, too, with I think his name is Duterte or something like that. Oh, Duterte.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it was corrupt at the top and it's starting to trickle down all the way to the bottom.
Well, when your president openly talks about raping and murdering people like that definitely sends a
message yeah it's not a good look no it's not it's not um like most people uh when the nationalist
army fell uh ko and everybody else fled to taiwan or what is now known as the republic of china
to some people to some people uh so because of his position as a war hero and the son of China to some people. To some people.
So because of his position as a war hero and the son of the dictator,
Koh continued to hold senior positions within the army and in the new one party state based on the island.
That was until 1964 when Koh really fucked up.
Oh, what did he do now?
So during a staff meeting of the first armor division of which Koh was the
commander, an argument broke out about the state of the country uh not in disloyalty against kai shek
of course um this was between ko and his deputy commander a general uh chao chi hua and they were
arguing that their leader was surrounded by corrupt officials and they needed to deploy their forces
to taipei to cleanse the government of them
indefinitely so it wasn't that chen kai shak was leading an awful government it was like all the
people around him are bad and must go um yeah it sounds like corruption all the way down yeah so
they're they're leading something of like a really soft military coup uh but because this is 1960s taiwan however every single unit had a political officer uh
in the same vein that the ussr had these guys would be remembered as commissars
the political officer uh at the time had power over anybody of any rank if they were talking
about disloyalty right and because these guys are dumb as shit the political officer was in the room
uh so they so the political officer arrested the commander and the deputy commander
well i guess that's that uh well not really short and sweet because uh hua being a a regular army
officer was swiftly sentenced to death um Ko being Kaishik's son
was spared any real punishment
instead he was
effectively barred from holding any real
military power ever again
he wasn't
like demoted he wasn't
sent away to like
I don't know the farm up north
for shitty old military officers
he was like just banished to work at a military academy forever I don't know the farm up North for shitty old military officers. Um,
he was like just banished to work at a military Academy forever,
uh,
which I suppose is a punish.
I don't know.
I guess he actually has to work there.
I think he got off pretty easy,
you know,
for,
for treason.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just having to work in school is not too bad,
especially because the guy he was planning with fucking swung at the gallows for it
yeah exactly like the other dudes did yeah he got off pretty late yeah and you know finally when
chen kai shek died in 1983 this uh like blank check of him getting away with everything kind
of went away and that led to a slight political liberalization of taiwan um and that was known as like the
localization movement also known as like the taiwanized nation movement um it refers to the
empowerment of the local taiwanese uh culture that had long been oppressed during the mass
migration of han chinese from the mainland after the defeat of the nationalism um i'm sure you can talk a little bit about that um
yeah the the local the local people um they they look a little bit different than
than the han chinese people and they're segregated in their own little communities in taiwan um
and very similar to the way that native americans are segregated in um in in amer. And I just kind of think it's an interesting kind of parallel
that they both, Native Americans and Native Taiwanese people,
they both feel like they're oppressed by the new people
who came into their land and took away their homes.
So now the Natives, they live in the mountains
and they have a poor standard of education and standard of life
and a lot very similar to some native american
tribes that are on these reservations so it's kind of a sad story and that goes on to this day huh
yep still it still happens to this day it's kind of like uh australia too the aborigines
it just seems kind of like you know if you if you're slightly darker skin than the people who
come bearing guns then you know they're gonna they're gonna think that you're lesser than
that's kind of something that's common in chinese culture i think uh even in the mainland um the
uighur people in the far west of of china the the muslim uighurs are uh getting pushed out of their
own territory and thrown in effectively concentration camps
while the Chinese government encourages Han Chinese to move into the area
and kind of manifest destiny the Uyghurs out of it.
Yeah, absolutely.
It's something that you don't really expect to be seeing much in 2018
because you just think, you know, hopefully the planet's moved past that.
But it's pretty evident in some places around the world, even in some places that we think are pretty first world.
Right.
Not all the way. Not in the entire country, anyway. In order to counter this localization movement, Koh decided that the only way to stop these goddamn natives
from getting unrestive is to run for president.
And he failed miserably in 1990
because even though he's Chiang Kai-shek's son,
everybody knew he was kind of an asshole.
And once you got rid of one Chiang,
you don't want to elect another one.
Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah. And once you got rid of one check, you don't want to, or one chain, you don't want to elect another one. Yeah.
I mean, yeah, I,
I definitely think you probably would have been worse than his dad.
Um, especially because the main thing that, that, and you know,
motivated him to run was native people having rights.
Yeah.
Not a good look.
Um, it seems like a pretty bad dude.
Yeah.
Um, finally co kind of disappeared from, uh, Not a good look. Seems like a pretty bad dude. Yeah.
Finally, Ko kind of disappeared from the public conscious and was about ready to fade off into the ether.
But then his maid was found dead in his house.
What? Yeah.
So they found a police found his maid dead from a gunshot wound.
They found a police found his maid dead from a gunshot wound.
And I can imagine that gun ownership in Taiwan is pretty strictly limited.
And it's a very low.
I was about to ask,
like,
where did he get a gun from?
Which makes us the rest of us even stranger because when police searched his house,
they found a massive cache of illegal weapons.
At least it was like 60 to 80 different firearms
that seems like he would fit right in in america but that seems very weird right this isn't
anybody's house in like fucking mississippi or something but yeah yeah uh this is like a military
like he lived uh in military housing in taipei um i guess the way it worked i'm sure you can
tell me if i'm right or wrong,
was like, if you're a general officer, the military kind of just gives you a mansion.
Yeah, yeah. It's kind of like the mayor's mansion or the governor's mansion. If you're a general, you get one too. Yeah. And that was the house where he had all these weapons,
and they were all weapons from the army. Oh, okay. That makes sense.
But which he definitely was still
not allowed to have because he had not been allowed to have a military command now for almost 40 years
yeah so he just murders his his maid yeah and one of the weapons uh was used in in in the shooting
and she was shot the way she was shot was like right in the face um and it wasn't um like there
was no gunpowder residue on her hands
and it wasn't it wasn't a point blank shot or anything um so the taipei police just declared
it a fucking suicide and washed their hands of the entire issue yeah apparently the being a chang
still helped him a little bit there yeah corruption runs deep let's just say that was
finally what uh made the kumintang kind of shun him
they didn't kick him out of the party but they just didn't allow him to go to meetings or or
have any party power anymore yeah yeah um now totally powerless ko spent the rest of his days
petitioning the communist government of the mainland to allow his father to be buried in his
hometown uh this is actually
apparently something that kind of still goes on uh where uh people want to be buried in the
mainland under a taiwanese flag and that you know beijing just laughs at them yeah that sounds that
sounds about right yeah uh and i i is i assume everybody laughed and gave him the finger uh this
this kind of speaks volumes of how little
the nationalists regard taiwan to me at least i mean correct me if i'm wrong um i mean this has
been decades since the nationalists fled to taiwan and set up what is effectively an independent
nation out on the island yeah but this nation that they built still isn't good enough to store
his corpse yeah it's just it depends on i guess his corpse. Yeah, it's just, it depends on, I guess,
if you're talking to Taiwanese people,
it depends on the generation that you speak to.
A lot of the, I want to say Chinese people too,
but I know more about the Taiwanese side.
You know, the younger generations don't necessarily feel
as much animosity towards Chinese
because they didn't necessarily experience the actual conflicts, but the older generations all remember.
There's a pretty big divide between the old people and young people these days in Taiwan.
That seems to be the case with most things in the Chinese sphere
of influence over there with younger people openly mocking
Xi and calling him the poo bear and stuff like that.
And then mysteriously getting disappeared.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
One person gets sentenced to like five years in prison
for that, I think.
Yeah, sounds right.
China's doing a lot of crazy shit over there.
I think a lot of it has to do with
they have the New Age Mao almost.
Not in the insanity of the Great Leap Forward
and the Cultural Revolution,
but in the strong of like the great leap forward and the cultural revolution but like in the strong man tactics um absolutely it's definitely his way or no way yeah i mean imagine
my twitter feed being from a chinese person i would be in jail so fucking fast oh yeah absolutely
i mean the only thing i use my twitter for is to literally curse out the president of the united
states and that would definitely not fly in china i would be i would be disappeared for sure oh yeah um and that was uh this petition
to get the his remains and his dad's remains moved to the mainland uh was so stupid even
the nationalist government didn't support it that's not a good sign yeah no it's not a good
look when your own government's like this is ridiculous yeah no it's not a good look when your own government's like this is
ridiculous yeah and it's not gonna happen it was a pretty big sign that the nationalist government
and the party and and the military was so over the changs um because uh so ching uh ko's son
was not in the military which from my understanding is pretty surprising
yeah because we have mandatory military service.
Right.
So he used his connections to get his kid out of it effectively.
Nepotism.
Yeah, which certainly never happens in any other nation of the conscription.
No, of course not.
But Ko wanted to move out of Taipei.
Ostensibly it was for health,
but it was probably to get away from the party who hated him.
Yeah. And so when he did that he handed his house over to his son who had not served in the military um this uh being the house that was a military gift effectively now this had happened
quite a few times from other leaders and nobody really gave a shit it was like just kind of
of shit it was like just kind of accepted as par for the course um so the government in ko's case decided to not only kick his kid out of the house they then fucking bulldozed it
all right you're not welcome here anymore yeah yeah like that that is probably the most stern
fuck you the government has ever put on anybody who is supposed to be benefiting from being the founding father's kid.
Yeah.
Holy shit.
I didn't know about that.
Yeah.
I didn't know that happened.
Ko finally died in 1997 from kidney failure in a Taipei military hospital.
Having only really achieved anything because his real dad really did not want to fuck up his marriage.
Cause I mean,
I can't imagine,
um,
a half Japanese born out of,
uh,
a half Japanese kid born out of wedlock was going to accomplish great things in
China in the 1920s.
No,
funny enough that the hospital that he died in was the hospital that I was
born in.
So what you're saying is you're the reincarnation of Chang Kong.
I'm continuing the legacy.
And yeah, you'll be seeing me up for world domination soon.
I'm sorry to start small with Taiwan and then China, but world domination.
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
I look forward to KMT2, the electric
boogaloo.
It's coming with
significantly less math.
You have already won me
over, sir. I am
so terrible at math.
Just not one of those math Asians, man.
Oh, man. So that's our story today.
Mike, thank you for coming on the show.
Thanks for having me.
Yeah. We've known each other for almost a decade and a whole tour in Afghanistan. And
you're on the other side of the country now, but I'm glad you could join us.
It's always nice having a firsthand witness to some of the stupid history on the show.
Yeah. And some of it is pretty stupid. I definitely agree with you.
Yeah.
I mean,
that's,
that's our kind of our brain is dumb history.
Um,
like I probably would have called the show drunk history of comedy central
than already beat me to it.
Yeah.
Um,
but you know,
I look forward maybe,
uh,
later on having you on again.
Um,
yeah,
absolutely.
That was fun.
Yeah.
Uh,
thanks.
And for everybody else,
do you want to pimp out your Twitter Thanks. And for everybody else, do you want
to pimp out your Twitter account or anything for people to follow for you screaming at the ether
of President Trump? I don't post anything other than like literally, fuck you, Trump, on my
Twitter. There's no need. There's no need. That's my outlet preventing my frustration towards the
current administration. But they should follow you.
You should throw your various social media handles.
Well, if you want to follow the show, you can follow us at Lions underscore by.
You can follow me at Jcast 99.
You can follow Nick, even though he hardly posts more than Nick and Nick Cass M1.
And our show will always be free,
but if you want access to our bonus,
uh,
content,
you can give us a dollar or so on Patreon.
If you think we're worth it and,
uh,
help support the show.
Uh,
you'll probably hear Mike's life story and his time with the hooligans on
there shortly.
So I look forward to that.
Um,
everybody else,
we will talk to you later.
Take it easy over there on the East Coast there,
Mike. Hey, take it easy, man. Hi, this is Nate Bethea, and I'm the producer of the Lions Led
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