Living The Red Life - Your Success Circle - Key to Growth?

Episode Date: January 4, 2024

In this thought-provoking episode of "Living the Red Life," host Rudy Moore delves deep into the concept of building and nurturing your personal and professional circles for success. Rudy emphasizes the impact of the people around you on your life, goals, and overall well-being, drawing parallels with maintaining a balanced diet for a healthy body.Key Segments:Rudy Moore introduces the theme of the episode and invites listeners to join him in transforming their approach to life and success.Rudy discusses the significance of your circle of influence, comparing it to a sports team where each member plays a crucial role in your journey.Exploring the 80/20 rule as it applies to lifestyle and relationships, Rudy highlights the importance of having a predominantly positive and supportive circle.Rudy addresses the reality of negative or neutral influences and how to balance them without compromising your goals.A deeper reflection on how your circle extends beyond professional life, touching upon family and personal relationships and their impact on your life.Rudy wraps up with actionable advice on evaluating and nurturing your personal and professional circles, emphasizing the long-term benefits of doing so.Featured Topics:Building a Supportive NetworkThe Impact of Social Influence on SuccessBalancing Positive and Negative RelationshipsThe Significance of Personal and Professional CirclesReflective Strategies for Personal GrowthListener Takeaways:Techniques to assess and improve your circle of influence.Strategies for maintaining a healthy balance of relationships.Tips on nurturing beneficial connections.Insights into the long-term effects of your social circle on personal and professional growth.This episode is a must-listen for entrepreneurs, professionals, and anyone looking to enhance their life through strategic relationship building. Join Rudy Moore in "Living the Red Life" as he guides you through the nuances of creating a circle that not only supports but propels you towards your goals.#LivingTheRedLife #SuccessCircle #RudyMoorePodcast #Entrepreneurship #PersonalGrowthDon't forget to subscribe for more insightful episodes and join our community discussionConnect with Rudy Mawer:LinkedInInstagramFacebookTwitter

Understand where you're at can change and it might not be easy to change and this is probably a reflective episode where you know We're not talking about marketing This is a big part of your life, right who you spend your time with is a massive part of your life And this extends into family too and relationships My name is rudy moore host of living the red life podcast And i'm here to change the way you see your life in your earpiece every single week If you're ready to start living the red life ditch the blue pill take the red pill join me in wonderland and change your life hey guys welcome back to another episode of living the red life today we're going to talk about building

the red life around your friendship groups your inner circle your peer group and how to build the best possible friendship groups that actually support you to grow. Now, most people listening to this, you have people in your world, your sphere, right, your circle of influence that are very beneficial. Okay, and then you also have people in your sphere and your circle that are not very beneficial. Now, if you're a serious entrepreneur, or you have serious goals in life, you have to build that sphere, that network,

kind of like a sports team. That's how I look at it. So I try and build my circle and spend time with my circle like a sports team. So I was very fortunate. I moved to America about eight, nine years ago. And apart from a couple of friends at grad school that I'm still in contact with and friendly with, which both kind of got into marketing and worked for me and, you know, kind of came into my entrepreneurial sphere. Apart from those couple of people, everyone I know in America is either a staff member, a family member or an entrepreneur. entrepreneur and I'm very fortunate of that because it basically forces my network group and who I spend time with to only be successful people. Now not all of you are fortunate enough to put yourself in that position and you have what I call baggage right. A lot of people have the old version of themselves and the friends and the people that were supportive of that or aligned with that 10 years ago. And a lot of us are scared or we don't want to hurt people's feelings. So we're afraid to

go and say, hey, this person doesn't serve me anymore because it's very cutthroat, right? When I say it like that, it's very cutthroat. So what have to understand is you you as an entrepreneur you're constantly adapting and growing and the people around you aren't constantly adapting and growing like you so a lot of people in your team right if we imagine like a sports team like I said or a sphere or a circle of influence they're not the right people anymore and if you were to recreate that sports team from day one now, what would that sports team look like? It would probably be different to the people around you. So think about that for a second.

If you were going to grow a sports team, i.e. a friendship group of people around you that got you to the best version of yourself in life and made you the most successful as possible, what would that look like? Okay. And again, this isn't for everyone. Some people, you know, they want to go out drinking every weekend and you want to do that too. And you're not like all in as an entrepreneur and maybe you can still be all in and still party at the weekends. I don't know. I don't do that. But, um, you know, so obviously there's a level of extremism here. I get this, but I want you to imagine and play the game with me for a second. So play the game of I'm creating this elite sports team, this draft pick, right? So who would all those people be

that make up that elite sports team? And I guarantee if you spent time and every day you were with those people in some capacity or texting or whatever, you would become way more successful than a normal group of friends or a normal sports team right and and that arguably you could have a bigger impact than all the day-to-day you do in your marketing because it's such a compounding effect of like knowing the right person to get you a million dollar deal knowing the right tax attorney to save you tens or hundreds or even millions of dollars, hundreds of thousands of dollars or millions of dollars in taxes, knowing the right person to

get you on the Joe Rogan podcast and Good Morning America and Ellen and all these shows, right? So having that circle could be as if not more powerful than the day-to-day your business that you grind on 10 or 12 hours and it's like a sports team if you're a mediocre basketball player and you train 10 hours a day you're going to get slightly better right over months and years but if your sports team was like five of the best NBA all-star players how good are you going to be in a game you're going to win pretty much every game, even if you're average, because the rest of the team around you are so elite. So I don't think a lot of people, and that's why I'm shooting this today for you guys,

because it's hard to make these decisions, and it's hard to analyze outside of work and outside of entrepreneurship. It's hard to sometimes analyze it. And a lot of us separate it and we go, oh, well, I go to these events and I meet these entrepreneurs and it's great. And I have a business partner and I'm in Rudy's mastermind and he's entrepreneurial. So I get this good energy and these good vibes and I have this good inner circle over here. But then half my life, I have this normal circle that doesn't serve me. And again, I'm not saying you can't have friends that like maybe aren't entrepreneur, you don't have to get

rid of everyone, but you have to create a stronger sports team. So going into this next few months and year, I want you to look at, you know, a lot of us look at our goals. We look at what we're doing in the day to day. We look at our marketing initiatives, we start to look at maybe our team as we become a bigger business. But how often do we look at our circle of influence, right? The people that influence you on a daily basis. And we can all get better at this. Like I can even I have amazing network and friendships and celebrity business partners. And, you know, a lot of who I speak to every day are like very successful people there's people that I'm ultra connected ultra successful people I'm connected with that I don't spend enough time with and there's people in my life still whether it's

staff or whatever that I spend way too much time and they bring me down. And you've got to understand you're basically on this continuum and you're either pulled up towards success and happiness or whatever in life, whatever your goals are, or you're on this spectrum and you're getting pulled in the opposite way. Okay. And the more, obviously, like any spectrum to go to the successful million dollar plus side, you need to spend more time with more people pulling you there and less, way less time with people pulling you on the left, right? Pulling you down and backwards.

And most people, it's inverted and shifted in the wrong way. So they have 80% of the time they're getting pulled down and backwards and only 20% of the time are they getting pulled up, right? 20% of the time is when they get on a live call or they watch a one hour podcast or they go to an event every couple of months and get two days of energy or they have a one hour coaching call with a marketing coach or a famous entrepreneur or someone successful, right? Or a friend that's successful that motivates them. But that's not going to work. It's like whatever you, it's like diet, right?

If you're eating horrible, terrible food 80% of the time and you don't have a terrible lifestyle, you're going to be ill and unhealthy. Whereas if you have a really healthy lifestyle and really healthy food 80% of the time and eat 20% of bad food, you're probably going to be okay because the laws of this repetition is what determines your outcome in life and success. So if 20% of the time you've got bad, maybe bad people or not even bad, just normal people that don't necessarily serve your goals, but 80% of the time it's all positive, it's encouraging, it's pushing you to be bigger,

better version of yourself, you're getting really good connections, you're getting motivated, you're getting all that great energy, you're going to become more, way more successful. So build that sports team. Think about those people in the circle of influence, right? And think about how do I play this 80-20 rule so I can still keep maybe people in my life that I care about that don't maybe serve my entrepreneurial goals, but get rid of most of the people that don't serve me and don't provide anything for me. And just because, you know, you've known them for years or you worked with them or work with them currently in a current job or whatever it is, you play sport with them. It doesn't mean they have to stay in your life. And the thing with a lot around relationships is when you constantly put yourself in new environments and meet new people, you make a lot of new friends and you continually grow.

If you're stagnant in the same place, in the same city, in the same job, then it's like kind of dating, right? If you never go on dates, you get worried you're never going to have a relationship. And if you're in the same environment, then you don't see that you can make new friends. So don't think and get yourself in a position where it's like, oh, these are the people I just went to school with and they're my best friends. And that's all I know, because you have opportunity to make new friends. And it doesn't mean you have to get rid of all the old friends, but you can have new friends that maybe give you a new look on life, a new outlook or new motivation or whatever that is. So I want you to go into this year and I want you to look at not only the business and the goals that you've set,

but I want you to look at the environment that I talk about a lot at. And a big part of that is the sphere, right? The inner circle, the sphere of influence. And, you know, a lot of this is like the famous saying, right? If, you know, your outcome in life is dictated largely by the five people you spend the most time with. And Les Brown, one of my friends and partners, he says it pretty well too. He says, if your nine friends are broke, you'll be the 10th, okay? And there's plenty of other sayings, right? If you show me your friends, I'll show you your future, okay? So this stuff has been around for many decades and it comes all the way from tribes, right? Depending on what tribe you're in and, you know, if you go back hundreds and hundreds of years,

that will dictate how you become and how you interact and what school you go to and then what clubs you join. And then as children, you know, if you're in a group of friends where they're all that study and play sport and have good relationships with their parents then you're probably gonna have a better outcome there than the other side now understand where you're at can change okay and it might not be easy to change and this is probably a reflective episode where you know we're not talking about marketing or anything because this is a big part of your life right who you spend your time with is a massive part of your life and this extends into family too and relationships okay you know Grant Cardone talks about this a lot with Elena

and I've spoke to them about it when I've been with them that and lots of successful people say this too the spouse is one of the biggest indicators of your success, right? If your spouse supports you or doesn't support you. So have a look at not only the inner circle, but the people you live with, okay? Family members, right? And look, I have family members and people that don't get what I do, and they don't get my decisions, and I might might fire staff or someone and they're like, how can you do this? They have, you know, families. But you have to understand that if you can't always

get rid of someone after your life, right, or you don't want to get rid of someone, then you have to just put up what I call this like force field, right? This shield where you don't let their input dictate your energy, outcome, emotional decisions, because you will have some people as you're listening to this saying, well, my spouse is the worst person for me based on that rank. You're saying, really, should I get a divorce? Or you're saying, oh, my, you know, blah, blah, best friend that I've known for 30 years is the worst person. If you can't always get rid of these people,

then you have to put like containers or parameters in place to make sure it doesn't affect you. And that's a skill I've had to learn. Like a lot of people, I've just naturally gravitated to. And I'm pretty cutthroat because I'm very focused on myself and my goals. That if someone doesn't really serve me, and I don't mean in a monetary way. If someone doesn't add to my life and make my life better then I kind of just move on and it phases out it's not like an awkward conversation generally it just phases out right and if there's people in my life maybe family members or whatever that I can't necessarily just you know walk away from or don't want to because

they're family then I create these force fields around me and containers so I know, hey, this person does this well, right? Or they, you know, they're a great family member, right? But they have no business clue and I'm not going to take any advice from them around business. So you have to kind of create these containers for these people so you know when to basically open up and let them in and listen to them, right? And let the energy in and listen to them right and let the energy in and then you create these barriers so when it's like hey they've moved into a section that they're not they shouldn't be talking about or impacting me on and then you close the the force field right so that's how I I

look at building that sphere of influence the last part of this is how do you find those new people, right? A lot of you saying, Rudy, this is great, but I, you know, I want to meet new great people that can build this elite sports team for me or this world-class circle of influence. And obviously the best way, in my opinion, that is how I've done it is go to events okay and I made a I guess a fortunate but also a very unique and extreme decision because I looked back at my life since moving to America and growing my businesses and this was about six years ago and I go all my biggest success the best people I've met the best contracts I've got the best money I've made the best opportunities the best lessons and contracts I've got, the best money I've made, the best opportunities, the best lessons, and where I've been the most like motivated has been at events and masterminds. So I looked at my

line and I go, well, if I know this to be true, how do I go to more of them? And then I go, well, I go to more of them if, you know, the reason I don't go to more of them is because I go to one, I come home for a week or two, I'm paying a lot of rent, I lived on the ocean in this like penthouse condo. I was like, well, I always come back for a week because, you know, I don't want to be away too long and I'm paying all this money and stuff. And I go, well, what would stop me doing that? And then just go to all these events. I go, well, if I didn't have this place and I have no reason to come back, then I would just go to as many as I could. So I kind of reverse engineered it and I gave up my lease, put everything in storage and I traveled the world for two years. And that was one of the best decisions I made because in those two years, not only did I have

a lot of fun, I traveled the world, saw a lot of great places, met a lot of great people, but my business continued to grow. And I really kind of built my brand and met really key people and put myself even more on a map, so to speak. So for me, it was events. I'm not saying for every single one of you it'll be events, but generally you've got to go where these people hang out, okay? So if you want to make gym friends, well then go to the gym and start working out and chatting with people. So try and find where these people hang out. Obviously big marketing events corporate events are the best but then you want to look at like other places right other places they hang out maybe it's the golf clubs maybe it's networking events maybe it's hotel lobbies maybe there's

like in your city there's different like pop-up business events so start looking at where these people hang out and then one tip that I found that's really successful is once you find a couple of people, then they usually have a good circle of influence too, right? So it's kind of fascinating because if you become friends with one person, then what I've noticed in my life sometimes is that one person, you go out with them, meet their friends, and then as long as you're proactive and engaging and interesting as an individual, those friends you get to know, and then they eventually kind of become your friends, and then it creates this cobweb, like spiderweb effect, right, where

now you made, from one friend, you made four new ones, and then those four have other friends, and now you've got 16, and then you kind of keep adding it, right, and it's like now you've met 100 people from like five people, or one person originally, and then four, and then you kind of keep adding it, right? And it's like now you've met 100 people from like five people or one person originally and then four and then, you know, eight or whatever. So really do whatever you can to get to the events and then look locally, of course, and then join groups, right? So like you can have a lot of my good friends are online and they're in like LA or Austin or wherever.

And obviously I have a lot in Miami where I'm based. And then obviously when I travel, I see a lot of great people. But you can join online groups, Facebook groups. You can join masterminds, coaching programs, live Zooms. And you can start to network with people online. And I've become friends online with people that I've known through the industry. And it's took two years until we've hung out in person but we've become you know we've chatted on the phone and blah blah blah so don't think that it has to be in person you can do it online

too and the last thing I would say is when you do have these opportunities you're at a mastermind event you're at a coaching event you're at a networking event you're at a bar you're at a Christmas party full of entrepreneurs. Be intentional. What I find, and I'm not always super intentional, but I find I go to these events, I meet 100 people, and then I have dinner with 10 or 20, and then the next night dinner with 10 or 20. But during that two-day or three-day event, there's probably like four people I really hit it off with, right? And I kind of go in my brain, I really like this person, I really like this person. And then for the rest of the two days,

I sit next to that person. And when it's cocktail hour, I go hang out with that person. We maybe go to dinner after the event ends with that person. And then, you know, we obviously have exchanged numbers and stay in touch and do a follow up call a month later. And I look at maybe where I can help them or connect them and that like builds this long relationship so some of my business partners some of my advisors some of my close friends have literally come out of that one thing where I met them briefly did a dinner and then I like was like this is a good person they have similar interests passions goals maybe you know their level of business is a similar size to me.

So a lot of the boxes checked, right? And then I was more intentional in continuing that relationship versus the other 60 people that were also at the event. So be intentional and then understand it doesn't have to be hundreds, okay? A few key players in your sports team, right? If you add Steph Curry and LeBron James and Michael Jordan to your basketball team, you don't need a bunch of people, right? You just need a couple of Tom Brady's.

And they can also help you meet other Tom Brady's, right? So look at that intention because that intention can get you a long way because it creates this ripple effect or that spider spider web effect that I was talking about so there you have it circle of influence how to build it how to really level the playing field because I feel a lot of you a lot of people I meet at least entrepreneurs they have way too many of the wrong people not enough of the right people in their life and it's okay to make that realization for yourself. And when you do make that realization and start to fix it, I promise you, your life will get better because,

you know, energy is just transferred, right? And if your energy is 80% of the time bad, it's very hard to find the good, okay? So do what you can to make those shifts in your life because I promise you your life will become better You'll meet better people you'll become more successful and overall you'll be way happier as a person and these little things have major shifts On your income right how much you earn as a company and you know don't work all day So then go and put yourself in this bad environment So do what you can both in the business and out the business to set yourself up for success. I'm not just talking about money here. I'm talking about happiness. I'm talking about fulfillment. I'm talking about health, right? Those people that align with those things cross over into many parts of life. So there you have

it. That's how you live the red life and build team red i'll see you guys soon take care you