Locked In with Ian Bick - Beat Up By The Police | Kyle Hunter

Episode Date: July 6, 2023

Moving throughout Illinois as a child, Kyle Hunter starts getting into trouble at school, leading him down a path of fights and drugs. In this episode we dive into Kyle's early childhood, his downward spiral into crime, his many run ins with law enforcement and the moment that changed his life forever and put him onto a path towards success.Connect with Kyle Hunter:www.coachkylehunter.com www.youtube.com/@coachkylehunterInstagram: @benicetomekyle  Connect with Ian Bick: https://www.ianbick.com/Subscribe to our membership program on YouTube to get early access to interviews, see behind the scenes photos & more:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRvVklIft6DMelVW18M0oBw/joinPowered by Q29 Productions, LLC Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Taste your escape. Kaman Jack, America's number one margarita. Kaman Jack is a premium malt beverage with flavors. Please drink responsibly. Kaman Jack beverage company, Chicago, Illinois. Hey, guys, it's Ian Bick, and we are back with another episode of Locked-in. On today's episode, I interview Kyle Hunter, who grew up. in Chicago and experienced a life of crime at a young age until one detrimental moment and an act of God

prevented him from a lengthy prison sentence and changed his outlook for the rest of his life. Thank you guys for tuning in to the show. Thank you guys for all the love and support. And if you could please, please, please take a one quick second and go to Apple Podcasts or Spotify podcast to leave us a review. It helps improve our show and it helps get the show out there to more people. Sit back, relax, and enjoy my interview with Kyle Hunter on Locked in with Ian Bick. Kyle Hunter, welcome to the show, man. Thanks for having me. You came all the, you just drove, what, 15 hours from Chicago to come on? 15 hours from the city, yeah, from the north side. That's awesome. Well, we appreciate you coming out

here and sharing your story. This is the first time you're going to be talking about your story on this level, which is exciting. And, you know, I really think the viewers are going to appreciate your story and kind of look at like the what ifs of what could happen if they continue on or don't continue on a certain path. So let's start at the beginning of your story. Where are you from? Where do you grow up? What's your childhood like? Yeah. So I grew up in Glenwood, Illinois, which is a South Chicago suburb, like 15 minutes from like the city line. Went to school there through grade school, started to have issues with like disciplinary stuff, getting into fights and that kind of thing. pretty young and then my parents were decided to move me to will county which was a town called mochina

which is much smaller and they had this idea of moving me away from like a higher crime area would help with a lot of the stuff that was going on and it didn't clearly but but i moved there at seven years old stayed until i graduated high school and then moved to decalb for a couple of years which is like a college town and ended up in Chicago for seven or eight years after that. And now I'm in the suburbs where it's quiet and safe and it's great times. So you spent your whole life in Illinois so far. Are you an only child? No, I have a younger brother who's five years younger. So okay. And growing up are your family, is your family wealthy, middle class, poor? Middle class. My dad was a truck driver when I was a little kid. Didn't make a ton of money, but worked constantly

traveled a lot. And over time, I think he started to find other opportunities and started to have more success in his career, which kind of allowed us to have the flexibility to move. And when we were in Mokina, we were like middle class, but definitely not towards the upper part of the food chain. Like that was like a relatively wealthy area. So that's, I mean, I wouldn't say we were poor, but we definitely didn't have like a ton of money, you know. What about your mom? What did she do for work? She didn't work. So she worked until I was born. and then was a full-time stay-at-home mom. Yeah, my parents did the same thing.

My dad worked and my mom was the stay-at-home mom. I mean, looking back on, I think that was probably the best thing that could have happened because you have that one parent that's devoted to the kids. You hear some stories where both parents are working. And like some kids I knew growing up, like they're always in daycare. They're always in child care. A babysitter. Like there's no family interaction.

Right. And they say that like those years leading up, to being like seven years old or so impactful on your mental stability later in life that it's just kind of crazy to think about like being left with another person that's not a parent for so long. I don't know. Who knows how that affects a psyche and all that? Yeah. And it can affect our actions or like abandonment or anything like that. It's just it's interesting like to see how people's like the early development. We've been getting into that recently on a lot of episodes on what their childhood is like and the relationships with their parents and how they affected

the future. So you had like a pretty normal childhood in that. Yeah, for the most part. I think my dad not being there was, um, was kind of difficult, like just with his work schedule is kind of nuts. So he was traveling, I'd say 80 to 90% of the time, um, to make sure that he had the money to take care of us. Um, so that component of it was unfortunate because it's like, you know, when he was home, that's who I want to spend all my time with. It's like, you know, my hero growing up as a kid, especially as a male, you know. So that part of it, I think, was a little different than a lot of households, at least where I ended up moving later on.

But for the most part, yeah, I mean, my parents are still together and they didn't do anything off the wall crazy that made me, you know, nuts. So they were pretty normal. So even though your dad was always working, you gravitated more towards your father than your mother? Absolutely. Why do you think that was? It's like a combination of things.

I've always respected his work ethic. It's been something that's still instilled in me now. He's a blue-collar guy. It's like just seeing how hard he would work to put food on a table and to be there for us. Was inspirational to me at a young age. And then you value that time with him so much more because he's rarely at home. So the, you know, a couple of nights every other week that I'd see him when he'd be there, it's just I'd be so excited to spend time with him.

And it was like there was like that ample. excitement for nights that I knew he'd be home early enough to get me from school or whatever. He protected me a lot when I was a kid. I remember at six or seven years old, getting into a fight outside of the school that I was at. And the kid that, I always had like a brain that was thinking 10 steps ahead with later in life with the criminal aspect. And as a child, just trying to think of consequences because I was real small. So I didn't want to just get into fights with people for whatever reason and then get beat up and, you know, I always wanted to have some kind of fair altercation. So I remember him, I would wait for him to pick me up from school before I'd do anything

to one of the other kids because I knew if that didn't happen, like I was screwed, you know? So, so I remember once I had like a lunch pail, right? You remember these like ice packs they made? They're like these blue rectangle things. Yeah, we still have some of us. Yeah. So my mom would put those in the bottom of my lunch bag and this kid who's a taller kid who was like messing with me every day and when I would leave school my mom would be there and I didn't want to do anything in front of her because like the kid's dad was always picking him up and he didn't really care that he was messing with me almost like thought it was funny type thing so I waited right for a couple of weeks and it just kept going on and like you know kids are like if they let they get away with it a

couple of times, even in adult life, like people that are praying on other people. That's just how they function. So, um, just continued and continued. And I remember the day that my dad was there to pick me up, I walked outside the front of the school. The kid like was kicking my leg or something messing with me. And I made sure he was looking. So he could like see the beginning of it. So it wasn't like it was all me. And I turned around and hit him with the, with the ice pack and smashed and, and, uh, put the kid down. The dad was like trying to grab my shirt and, and, and, and, you know, you know, like pull me off of them and my dad like grabbed him and they got into it. And it was just cool to have him like have my back with it and teach me like defend yourself,

that kind of thing. And later in life like that stayed with me and just, you know, I gravitated towards him just because like the male energy of him as a protector and a provider. I think it's just a natural thing. Not that I didn't love my mom. I think she's phenomenal. She's put a ton of time into us. it's just, I feel like a natural progression, you know. Yeah, it's amazing that you were, had that mindset to think about consequences and what could happen if you did something or didn't do something a certain way. Absolutely. I never thought about that as a kid and that led to every single one of my problems.

Now I'm way more calm and cooler and collected and think about it before I make a decision. And then the thing with your dad, like now that you're saying that, that makes me think too because my dad, like, I love my mom and she was the one that was raising us and my dad was working, but he was the one that took me to karate. He took me to the tournaments when, you know, we went to New Jersey to do, like, grappling and wrestling and all this stuff. And he took me the basketball games when I was on the basketball league. And he was always, like, there for me showing up in that regard. And I remember he was the first, because I was bullied as a kid. I was a one called, you know, Twinkie and Fatso and, like, every bad name, because kids are just,

you know, fucking ruthless. And he was the one that he said, Ian, you know, you just got to hit him in the nose. Like, that's what you do. Someone bothers you. Just fucking whack him. And it took me a lot to build up to that to do it. And that's why I went to karate, um, because I had a lot of like self-confidence issues and that. And I did it. And then when the bully finally hit me and I hit him back for that like that first time, well, one, the bully never touched me again. And two, my dad, I went right to my dad and to dad. I hit him. He said, said, good job. Even though I was getting suspended, he said good job. And he was always in my corner. Was bullying a big part of your childhood? Not really. I kind of liked to fight. So I think for the

first few years of grade school, it was, because I was a really small kid. And I was like super awkward looking because I had like, my nose was still kind of big like then. It's not as disfigured as it is now, but it was like, you know, I just, I had this like look to me where I'd get constantly like picked on for little stuff. And it never really bothered me. But, as I got older, I started to get into more fights just for whatever reason. I'd say like six, seventh and eighth grade. It was a lot more consistent. And I started to enjoy the physical part of fighting. Eventually, like, started to train the same way like you're talking about. I didn't know that you did all the martial arts stuff. That's really cool. Do you still do some of that now?

I actually just got into boxing. Again, when I got out of prison, I did some boxing and then COVID happened. And then I got back into it recently. And it's just been like super. therapeutic that to me like that's like my therapy and I'm training because I want to like go into that whole world of you know there's like celebrity boxing and this and that like I just feel like that could be a good component and I just like love that underdog story like I love training and working for something like building this podcast starting at nothing and building it to what it is now I feel like that with boxing because I'm not I'm the first person to say I'm not the most athletic I'm not the most flexible I'm not the fastest I'm not the strongest but I've been just changing my body

the last few months and just like going hard. I'm in the gym like twice a day now. And I love that and that's like a big part of who I am. So it just, I don't know, like that whole, it's mindset really what it is, what the human body can endure, what you can go through and how you can progress and really change yourself. Like the idea of focusing on one thing and like committing yourself to that no matter what and just going for it is great.

Did you ever see yourself becoming the bully like the other end of the spectrum? because of your love for starting to fight? Not really. I still kind of felt like I had to stand up for a lot of those kids. Like I guess it kind of depended on the situation. I'm not going to say that I never bullied anybody, but it was never like my MO. I didn't like go out seeking kids to like pick on or anything like that.

I've always had like this weird like line in the sand kind of moral compass my entire life even through like all the crazy years that I had where like for example, I never believed in stealing, and everybody I was around was constantly looking for people to rob or people, the houses to break into and all these things. And it just never sat well with me. So I don't know if that was upbringing or what it was, but I would have this like this guilt, even at a young age where I didn't want to pursue a lot of those things because I knew that I would feel bad afterwards or regret it or whatever. And I just didn't believe in that kind of like behavior. So, yeah, I would say that it wouldn't, it didn't make me.

bully kids more or like, you know, more than anybody else. But I definitely like participated in some of that. I mean, I can't say that it, you know, never happens. I think we're all like in one way or another, we get bullied and we can bully others like, you know, indirectly. We don't know our actions at the time. Like I've read some comments from people like when the HBO documentary came out and stuff. They're like, the kids a bully. It was a bully in high school. And I'm thinking to myself, like I didn't intentionally mean to do that. But people can, think that if like I didn't invite them to a party or I didn't do this or I didn't do that. It affects people because people react to certain things and they feel different emotions.

And at that age, you're not self-aware and you're not, you're only focused on yourself. You're not keeping in mind other people's feelings. Absolutely. Now, is high school the part of Chicago that you're in is the high school like what we hear about on the news like in Chicago, our kids like bring guns to school? Is there crime? There was crime and kids did bring weapons to school. but it wasn't like an inner city school.

So I was far enough outside of Chicago to where it was, I mean, we still had 4,000 kids. So don't get me wrong, there's a ton of people at the high school I went to. But the crime was different. It was more drug-related. And there's a lot of opiates and that kind of thing. It was very common, prescriptions, stuff like that. I was in high school for a lot of the oxy-cotton pandemic stuff,

where like the 30-millimeter oxy-cotten were super common and popular. So those kind of flooded and like heroin's huge in that town. So that kind of stuff is is very common. Weapons in school I did see, but it wasn't very, it wasn't like an everyday thing. I don't have to worry about somebody shooting the afterclass type of thing. Did you do drugs or alcohol during high school? Yeah. So actually before high school, I think.

So when I was 14, 15, I had a lot of like trauma, deaths in the family, things like that that really affected me negatively. Back then, I didn't know how to process those things or how to, talk to people or really how to deal with any of that. So I saw my dad as this like stoic figure, right? So I didn't want to go to him and feel like a bitch for, you know, for having these like emotions or whatever. My mom is an Italian and she's got like, she's like a very emotional person as it is. So I didn't want to bring things to her unless it was like absolutely necessary. So I internalize a lot of things like really young. So I think that development went like I was an honor roll student up until seventh, eighth grade. And then I had an uncle pass and a grandmother and

stuff. And there was like a lot of that that happened in a short period of time. And then that turned me into more of like, like I need to find an escape somehow, right? So I started this with smoking weed and taking pills and whatever. And that progressed eventually to heroin and other things. So I definitely participated in a lot of that. And I sold drugs for many years as well at, at first for money and then it kind of turned into like a habit. So, so yeah, I think it's, I think it was all related to like trauma stuff that I'm digging through now like all these years later. But I never would have thought of that then. Like then it was just like I felt kind of trapped. So rather than try to talk to my parents or somebody that I felt like could help me with it, I didn't understand it fully.

So I would just do drugs with the other kids and start to hang out with people that may have been like undesirable for that type of progression, but it also gravitated me towards people that were without either without a family member, without a parent, people that were already involved in criminal activity because I was like thinking of like this person has the same struggle as me and it, we have like this weird bond where we can talk to each other and it makes sense, right? But I can't go home and talk to anybody the same way. So I think that that's like a lot of what pushed me towards, like, that kind of activity was, I mean, those guys ended up like brothers to me because we spent every day together and all our time together, but we were doing things

that obviously were not good for anybody. Looking back on it now, what do you think was the most traumatic experience as a child? To be honest, I think it's just a, it was just a combination. I mean, I had all of our, I had family Christmases and stuff like that that were, like, big elaborate, had everybody there, like a lot of, uh, a lot of stuff that like was warming the heart growing up and was good for the soul type thing. And then years later, uh, like age 14 and 15, I had lost, uh, three or four immediate,ish family members. Um, so grandparents, uncles, stuff like that. And it just kind of ruined that, uh, that part of my life. So we no longer had these like big family

get togethers and things like that. And I think that's an important component of anybody's life is like having family that you rely on or whatever. So it's hard to say exactly what it was. I do remember when my mother's brother passed, we like went together to tell my grandma. And I was 13, I think, and my brother was eight. And I just remember like them bringing us with and like her finding out through us and just that like screaming and like, you know, that the hurt that it caused her. I just remember all that being like really really vivid. So I would say a lot of a lot of that would be probably I mean none of the like violence like physical violence and stuff like that ever really stuck with me until later on. But as far as like true emotional trauma, it was mostly all loss.

And when when you associate it with like the family gatherings where your peace as a child and then you lose that piece, I think in any situation when you lose your peace, it kind of derails you. that's like when a job loss, if your job's your piece or relationship loss and that relationship was your piece, you lose it, it could spiral you. So in your sense, that kind of spiraled you to drugs. Absolutely. What was that first drug you tried? We won't count weed. I mean, that's like it's a recreational thing. Every kid goes through it. What's like the first hardcore drug you try? Hardcore, it's probably heroin, but I don't know if you consider like Vicodin and stuff like that hardcore. I would definitely, you know, that's a, it's a, it was, it wasn't prescribed to you.

No, no. So, uh, Norcos were like everywhere. And I remember taking those first and then just random prescriptions like Xanax and stuff at school. I mean, freshman year, high school, every kid had different things that they'd bring to school and try to sell or trade for other things. So I would just take whatever I could find at that point. So, but yeah, I think Vicodan was the first. Was that because of the environment that kids were doing that? Or was the school not preventing it? What do you think it was? It was both. I mean, there's so many kids.

Like 4,000 people is a lot of people to, like, manage on a daily basis. And a vast majority, I feel like, of kids that were my age were involved in that kind of stuff. Whether it was for, like, social reasons, like, they thought it looked cool if they sold drugs or whatever their reasoning was. It was, like, so common that you didn't have to look far. It was everywhere. So it was really, really common. I mean, actually, Will County, I was looking at statistics yesterday's. of the worst in Illinois for just overdose deaths and like thinking back on how many friends I've

lost over the years like because of how that progressed because once all the oxygotten went away when the DEA had this like big crackdown. I don't remember what year exactly it was, but we replaced it with heroin. So now everybody's doing heroin and then it's as the fentanyl thing has gotten worse. It's just constant funerals, deaths, people that are that are dying over the stuff. So it's just crazy to see how it's progressed over the years from this like little pill take it was no big deal you know and now it's everybody's in the ground you know i'm sure that really makes you think too like just thinking about how you got past that and you survived that yeah absolutely not everyone makes it along the way and that's why like these stories they're heartbreaking when you

hear about it because some individuals especially the ones that come on the show they've been through so much and they've really pushed their limits with drugs and there's so many people that are dying every day from drug use every day and when you see those statistics and when you look at it and you're like, holy shit, like it gives your life, you know, more meaning. And I think it gives people the urge to tell their story so they can inspire people to not be another statistic. Yeah, two of my best friends passed from overdoses

that I had spent my entire, you know, adolescent life with. And it's rough, like, just thinking about, you ask so many questions afterwards. Like, it's not the same as like a suicide, but it's, there's a lot of pain that they leave behind with the people that care. about them, right, where you're just constantly wondering, like, could I've gotten to this person sooner? Or is there something I could have done, right? And those kind of things stick with you for a long

time. How do you transition from using to selling? So I was selling before I was using anything harder than weed. So my first couple of years of like drug use were just weed. It took a while to start to progress to other things. I think I was 16 when I took the first like Vicodent. And so it was a little bit of time. But I saw how lucrative. like the weed business was back then because we're talking 2006 like it wasn't legal anywhere yet so everything was a lot more expensive I had a lot of different routes to go and get things through friends and things so I just came up with different plans of like how I was going to sell it and then I sold weed for a couple of years and made decent money doing it and just went from there and was the

money the motivating factor at first yeah so it was for a lot of years I I would say until I was 19 or 20, like money was the main factor for why I did anything. Just because I enjoyed like that feeling of like having a lot of cash in my pocket or being able to buy what I wanted to when I wanted to. But yeah, I mean, it turned into like funding a drug habit like way later down the line when I started to do harder drugs. And I realized like, man, these are expensive. So I better sell more of this to get some of this, you know. Did that need for wanting money come from not having a lot when you were a kid? I don't know. I don't think so. I think it was more just the people I was around.

So just to backtrack, when I was in seventh grade, I was 12 or 13, I remember I was sitting in like the cafeteria and hanging out with like some of these kids that I was, that were like academic type kids. And I remember seeing a guy come running into the cafeteria with like a blue bandana on his face. flatbrim on and just crushing this kid with a book and beating a living shit out of him in front of everybody and i was like man that was badass like who is that i find out who it is his name is cody ended up being a good friend of mine like years later and that i remember that moment changing my mindset to thinking like i want to start to have that same like fear like i want people to see me as like a bigger person than i am because i physically i'm so small so a year or so later i introduced myself to this kid because I was in gym class with him or whatever and we got to like being

good friends like over time he had like a similar similar situation lost his father not too many years prior um we had a bond like a bond in that aspect and we started to get along really well and then that became one of my best friends going forward and he was a lot of where the drug stuff came from because he was already heavily involved in all of that so it just kind of pulled me into it so yeah i mean it's a people that were around that can affect our decisions. I remember in middle school I was trying to fit in and I was around guys that were like selling pot and you know skateboarding and stuff and I started doing that even you know I would get free weed from one of my close friends who would steal it from his dad and we were selling weed out of like the little film capsules. Right. And I was carrying around a skateboard and I

changed my appearance even though I couldn't skate for shit and I changed my appearance like I grew my hair out and I had highlights. I looked like a fucking chipmunk or a squirrel. And I had the backward hat. I was wearing DC shoes, DC hat, the clothes from Zumis and Pax Sun. And I was just trying to be someone I wasn't

because I wanted to fit in. But that was the people I was around and that had this effect on me. And I didn't realize it at the time until way later. It's crazy when you really like dive in and you think about it. Yeah.

That's the same style we had too. So that's funny. Do you graduate high school? Yeah. So you make it through high school No major problems or anything like that? I almost didn't walk in graduation, but that was just from doing like stupid shit at school,

you know, like blowing air horns and throwing shit. I got banned from high school graduation. Did you really? Yeah, and then I had to go. Bonjour, compadre. It's the Priceline negotiator. How do I negotiate so many great travel deals? My greatest gadget.

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or just grabbing one more spoonful of yogurt. Keep it real. Look for the seal. Real California milk by real California farm families. Go to summer school for two weeks, but they said we'll let you go to summer school, but you can't walk at graduation. But looking back, I don't really give a shit.

Like, it was probably for the better. I probably would have done something ridiculous back then. Pretty much. Yeah. So you make it through no major problems. Do you go to college? Yeah. So I got into Northern Illinois University.

And that's, I think, where a lot of the future stuff started. Because I barely squeaked in, like, my last couple of years of high school, I definitely wasn't trying anymore or applying myself academically. And then I got accepted there. A girl that I was dating at the time was also going there. So I was kind of following the girl, which was really stupid. but definitely no do that if you're thinking about it because it's like follow your own bath type thing it always results with a girl yeah it does yeah so so I did go there and yeah that's I

didn't finish I went for a year uh failed out the set the second semester and stayed there for a second year just to party and sell drugs did you have a major at all yeah so I went for engineering technology and you were passionate about that or it was just whatever yeah I mean it was cool like I was into, like, because it's a lot of working with your hands and using CAD to like make cool stuff, but I, my head wasn't there. I just didn't care. I think school was like the last thing on my mind. I just went because it, like, pleased my mom, you know, she, you know, like parents are you're probably close to my age. They think, they have this like mindset of you have to go to college. You have to finish school in order to get a good job. But obviously isn't entirely true. But we're like programmed to believe that at such a young age. So when I got out of high school, it was basically joined the middle. military or go to school. So I was planning on the military and took the ASVAB and scored high enough to where even the recruiter was like, go to school, dude, you get a brain. I'm like, all right, yeah, I'll try that. Shit, just trying the military. I hate that stigma. The whole you have to fucking go to a good college to be successful. And then people were like, oh, there's only like one percent

of people that are actually successful without college. But like, it's fucking ridiculous. It's bullshit. You do not need college to be successful on any level. What you need is mindset and you need determination and you need the will to go out there and want to carve your own path and try to figure something out because school's not for everyone. No, not at all. It wasn't for you. It wasn't for me. Like I'm not the type of kid that'll sit there and open up a chemistry book and try to figure it out.

It's just, it's not me. It's never going to be me. Right. And I got friends that are like, why don't you go to college now? And I'm like, I'm not passionate about it. I'm not interested. you have to do the things in life that you're passionate about and interested in. Anything else is irrelevant and life's too short in that basis.

Yeah, just to give you an example, when I started in the automotive business, I was a porter like moving cars. And the first promotion I got, I started writing service. And that started me at like 55 a year. And I remember kids getting out of college like a couple years later telling me that they're making 40 to 42 or something like that in average. And I'm like, well, why would I go to school? and then I ended up getting that to like 100K over like three or four years.

And like now it's like I have no use for going back to do it whatsoever unless I wanted to go start an entry level job somewhere and start the whole process over. It just makes no sense. Exactly. So yeah, but the passion thing is definitely where it's a. So many people I know from high school got a degree, some bullshit degree in marketing, business, whatever. You know, and they come out and then they go and they get a job that's not even in their degree and it's making way less below. market value. I was at Whole Foods. I would have made over $100,000 last year, no college degree, felony record, all from hard work, determination, and moving through the ranks. And people are like,

oh, I don't want to work at a grocer store, this and that. The point is opportunities out there if you apply yourself. How is the relationship with your parents going on when you drop out and do they know you're selling drugs? What's like the dynamic? It's not good because that's when I started going to jail too. So I had my first two arrests, I think my sophomore year of college, first semester that year. And then actually, I think I had three arrests that year. So I had three ongoing cases in that county at one time. And they were definitely not in a good place with me in general because they,

I think they started feeling like there was nothing they could do, which is unfortunate to see the people that raised you, like feeling that way, obviously. But, but yeah, I mean, I just started, I'd get arrested. They'd tell me, if you. you get arrested again, you're going to go to prison and get arrested again. You know, same thing would repeat over and over again. And a lot of why I thought your story was so shocking was like the number of times that I've been to jail in different counties with ongoing cases and probation in different areas and never did prison time. It's just insane. And like hearing your story, I was like,

this is, this is nuts. Like the way that they just threw the book at you, dude. It's crazy. What are you getting arrested for? The first time, so I was selling. weed out of my, well, not out of my dorm my freshman year, but I had like houses set up around the campus. I knew older kids that also went there that either went to the same high school or somebody I met through friends or whatever. So I would pay people to keep safe set like their houses so I could go place to place and I'd never had anything in my living area. You know what you mean? So I did that for a while and the police, I think, were, I don't know if they were catching people that I was dealing with or what was happening, but I know that they were like kind of onto what I was doing. And eventually they like

came and raided my dorm, which is basically just four cops like come and rip your dorm apart and throw shit all over and didn't find anything. And I could just tell it like they definitely like knew what was happening. I don't know how. Probably somebody, you know, got caught with something small and said my name or whatever. But they were definitely keeping track of me for like a while. So my sophomore year as soon as I got there, I think it was like the first or second weekend of everybody being back at school, they found, they came to my apartment, like seven or eight cops, knocked on the door. I thought it was a friend, opened it, and they saw a pipe on the table, and that's their probable cause. I mean, I didn't even think to look, you know, it's like the first week in a school. I just moved in

and shit. And they ransacked the place. I got, I think, a paraphernalia charge and a possession charge there, which was pretty small, class A misdemeanors, I think. And then a few, I'd say, three to four weeks later, I was super hammered at a party. Somebody hands me like a solo cup of vodka full to the top of vodka and I slam it. I'm 18, 19, just thinking I'm a party animal. And then I can handle it. I can't black out like immediately. Fall, crack my head open on this like pavement, right? And this kid that I'm with is like, yo, we should probably call somebody like, you're fucked up. I'm like, ah, yeah, it'll be fine, you know. But I was bleeding so bad that like eventually they called. So they call the ambulance. The police show up instead, of course. And right away, they're like cuffing people for drinking underage. And I said something like, you guys weren't the ones that we called. We called for an ambulance. The fuck are you doing here arresting people. And, you know, the cops are giving me a bunch of shit. So I spit in the cop's face. And they arrested me for a felony assault on a police officer that time. I had a half ounce of weed like in my pants. They found like when they fucked me up and like went through my shit. I found that. I found that.

So I got charged with that. And then a little while after that, I, like, blew out somebody's back door with, like, a lawn brick. I was, like, fighting a kid in, like, the living room. It's so stupid, dude. Like, so thinking back on some of this shit, like, we fought because I didn't like the song. The kid was playing on the TV at this party. So I said something. It's fucking shit's garbage, you know?

And he's, what'd you say? You know, stupid fucking shit. We started fighting. And I beat his ass. Some kid that lived there saw this happening and grabbed me while I was on top of the guy and held me, held me there while he fucked me up and threw me outside. I'm like, all right. So I picked up this lawn brick and blew out their back door and they came running back out. We got to fight and get to the backyard. I got arrested that time for like criminal damage to property and a few other

things. Yeah. You're telling this whole story right now and I'm just thinking about super bad. Yeah, pretty much. Spitting at the cop and this and that. That's just wild. Yeah. Yeah. So that was a few of them. Yeah. But I mean, this is all ongoing. And like, so my parents got a call that night. right at three in the morning when uh when i spit on the cop and they basically told them like hey your son's arrested for a felony assault on a police officer right it's no joke like that's Terry carries like real time um so they panic and they start calling all these attorneys well the cop that i spit on ended up beating the shit out of me so bad that like i had a torn rotator cuff could move my arm like i was

bruised covered in bruises like face arms legs and they ended up dropping the charge so they said that it was they dropped it to a battery charge. I basically said that I spit on a paramedic instead of a cop. I think probably because all the paperwork and all the stuff that was involved because it was bad. Like I had to go to a hospital and get checked and all this shit. I was beat up. So the cops are just like attacking you?

Dude. They had me cuffed. I was like sitting on a stairwell. Had me cuffed and the cop like I said something like, you know, what are you guys doing here? We didn't call you. He tells me to shut the fuck up. Fuck you, this and that. Get into it.

And he gets real close to me and he grabbed my shirt like he was going to hit me. And I spit on him when he pulled me into him, you know? And as soon as I did it, he turned me over and just started stomping me into the stairs, dude. And like, your actions warranted that or no? Fuck, no. I mean, I don't know. It's hard to say, like, I expected it. Like, it was stupid.

I shouldn't have done it. But, like, it was pretty rough. Not to get your ass beat. No. So they took my blood after this happened, right? And I had, uh, my butt alcohol was like a 0.38. It was like fatal level. Like, it's like 30% of your blood is fucking vodka, dude.

It's insane. You know? So, like, just knowing that I was that hammer. It's like, I don't know if I would have done that to a kid. Like, you're kind of being an asshole to know. Yeah, especially a kid. You're not dealing with a grown man and you're handcuffed. I mean, like, we had Steve, the CEO on the show and he's like, you know, when you have someone

in handcuffs, it's over. Like, there's no beef. Like, you can't. What are you going to do? You're playing that hierarchy card and the bad guy, tough guy thing when the other person's handcuffed are locked in the cell. Yep. So that's kind of like that and this.

Absolutely. And it's interesting to hear that that does go on. I mean, we hear about it in the news and. stuff like with with cops and stuff. The fact that they literally beat the shit out of an 18 year old kid. Yeah, more than once. Like, that's happened to me a few times. Your parents are probably getting like devastated and frustrated with you at this point. Oh yeah. Absolutely. I still remember like the call that I like got from them the day after where they thought that I was going to be looking at prison time, you know, and it just took a while for them to understand like, hey, it got dropped.

Like it'll be fine. I for some reason I didn't care when it came to myself. Like the whole time, there's all these people telling me, these prosecutors, there's my lawyer or all these people telling me you're going to go to prison for an extended period of time. If you keep getting in trouble, well, I didn't care. It was like nothing slowed me down. I would just keep doing stupid shit, almost as if, like, I had no purpose, right? There was no direction in like my path, right? So it took a while to like start to get to the point where I actually had life purpose in general because I knew that all these actions like were going to come with real consequences. they knew what I was doing.

And when I started to graduate from the weed to the Coke to the ecstasy and all these other things that I was still selling in decent quantity, like it was even more dangerous. You're playing with fire the entire time with priors. And I don't know. I just never really gave a shit. What do you think you needed looking back on it now back then? Like to deal with stuff from when I was a kid, you know? I still think that's why I do a lot of the coaching stuff that I do now.

So I have a coaching business that I run both in sports and for like individual coaching because it's so common for people to have these like especially like young men to have feelings of like just that they can't express to people. Right. And sometimes that's all it takes is somebody to talk to. I feel like I needed that the whole time. I just didn't know how to say it. Right. And I didn't understand it. I didn't know enough about myself. And I was so fucked up half of the time like either drunk or on drugs that like how am I going to figure it out, you know? So I think that it's a combination of things, but... Yeah, because the world's not fucking talking about it. Like, a perfect example is I will meet women and they see that I'm more, I guess, emotionally intelligent in a lot of ways and I'm open about my feelings and I'm open about my thoughts and that took like a lot of therapy to get to that. And they're not used to that from past men. So you look at those men who they were used to not being open, keeping their feelings in

because it's like the societal, you know, point that it's like men don't go to therapy, men don't talk about their feelings, that's not masculine, this and that. That's what needs to change. I mean, all these men out here, that people are dealing with that, they're not open. Like, that's what needs to be fixed. And maybe situations like yours, if that was an open conversation, because mental health and mental illness is real with men. It's not just women. It's a joint factor. Yeah, absolutely. How does this progress? How does it get worse from here? So those three cases ended with, they gave me a deal basically that was three years, three or four years of probation. Just if you get arrested again, you're going to get the full extent

of these charges. So you got a slap on the rest. Pretty much, which is insane to me. But how I got the attorney I had to was just kind of insane. Like my parents were like panic dialing different attorneys at two in the morning, trying to figure out how to get me. out of the situation I was in and like some random attorney who's like a federal lawyer downtown answers a call. I'm in DeKalb, which is two hours away. And he's used to doing murder cases and stuff that's way more high profile than mine. I guess felt sorry for them or something on the phone. Answers his cell phone at 2 a.m. and says, yeah, I'll take the case. And then starts coming to DeKalb, Illinois for all my court's like court dates for months and took care of me like really well. So I think

he was the reason that that I got taken care of so well, um, or that my deal was so, uh, was so much better than I thought I was going to be. Um, but I had the option to go to trial through all that and it was just not realistic because, I mean,

how are you going to prove that the underage consumption is like one of those things are guilty. It's like I'm 18. I, they fucking took my blood. I was like, like, fuck, you know, so I couldn't. So I took the deal, um, paid a bunch of money, did these classes, whatever. It was really, really easy as far as, uh, overall like slap from the wrist.

So I go home. to my hometown. And within a month or two of being there, I'm driving, like, just randomly 10 o'clock at night. The cops there knew me and were way worse than any other area that I had ever been in. Like, they knew that I was involved in the drug dealing and, like, sale of all these different things. So they would pull me over and fuck with me constantly.

And, like, if they smelled anything or if they wanted to search my car that day, they'd find a reason to search it. But half the time they wouldn't document these stops because they wanted to see what I was doing, fuck around, basically say, hey, we know what you're doing, and then let me go. So this day, they pull me over and the cop comes to the window and he says, get the fuck out of the car. I said, for what? He said, I didn't have, I'm not talking to you, like, get the fuck out of the car. And I told him, fuck off, you know, I rolled the window up. So he smashes it with the baton. Smashes your window with the baton. Immediately, dude. And they charged me with a resisting

police officer. I didn't even know it was a charge. I thought, I knew resisting arrest was a thing, but I wasn't resisting arrest. I just was like, you didn't tell me why you said, you didn't tell me why you stop me. I'm not fucking opening this fucking door, you know. So it closed it. They smashed it. Pulled me out and fucking threw me on the pavement. It shit fucked me up. Threw me in the back of the car. Sargent comes over and he says, you know, you want to apologize to the officer? I said, fuck you. Absolutely not. They took me in and I got this random misdemeanor charge I'd never heard of for resisting police. So I talked to my attorney again and he said that that would violate what I had going on in the other county. Apparently they never talked.

so I kept going to court, which was really weird. Like I was going to like drug court and shit and taking drops like in Will County for something that usually would just be like a really, you know, minuscule charge in comparison. So I'm going to court in both counties at the same time. And then I end up moving to this like suburb closer to the city with another girl. And I was working for Chevy at the time, which is like I just got into the car business. I was selling a lot of Coke and a lot of ecstasy. I found this system where I would go to concerts and I would bring just like a shit ton. I mean, I'm sure you're very familiar with like this aspect.

But I bring a shit ton of caps of just molly and different shit, you know, and I'd bring them in, sell them all in the first 20, 30 minutes, make a ton of money and leave. This was like a nightly thing because Chicago has so many concerts going on at all times. So I was doing this for a pretty extensive amount of time and getting like black market drugs and shit. Like I had friends that were on the Silk Road that would order stuff, give it, me, I'd go to the concerts and do the legwork. So the Coke came after that because the after party started to get so nuts that I would go out, sell these capsules, make my couple thousand

dollars or whatever at the show. I mean, I'm talking to just disgusting amounts of like, of caps, like just in my jock walking into these places. How they never found these things, I have no idea. Well, security was way different back then. There wasn't mass shootings and this and that in these, you know, sports. That was a place of gathering. It didn't really change until like the later in the 2000s in that aspect like the early 2010s and later yep that's for sure so um but anyway that that was my income for a while right on the side so i was still working the full-time job uh writing service in cars because on paper it looks like i'm making a good living like i think i was doing 70k there or 70 to 80k at that range um and i was so young that that was great money you know

why would i ever go to school those type of shit you know immediately what i was thinking like it's fucking stupid. So I started to get into the Coke because I would go to these after parties with friends and stuff that would help me with the selling stuff. It was like a big concert. I'd have three or four guys with me that would all, I'd give them whatever and we'd figure it out at the end. So we start going to these parties. I start bringing the Coke and that brings the popularity. Now everybody wants to be at the parties that I'm at because there's a lot of blow. and it started to go sideways where I was like getting really sloppy with what I was doing and I was in between houses. I can't remember what the reason was, but there was a guy that I worked

with that lived in Indiana and it was, I think it was closer to work at the time and I was like, I'm going to move in with him. So I'd go to transport everything early in the morning one day and I was driving a company car. I was like a brand new Impala. I was late, you know, and I had everything in a duffel bag in the back seat. So this is what I was telling you, like, where this divine intervention came in, right, where I'm driving to work going 120 on the highway and I'm going through a construction zone and get pulled over. I'm like, a fuck, you know, like if you go, I think it's like 15 over in a construction zone they arrest you immediately. So it was like reckless driving or something along those lines. So cop pulls me over and I have nothing in the car. It's a brand new car. It's a dealer car.

Nothing's in the car except for this duffel bag in the back seat that's got, a half ounce of blow. It's already bagged out. It's got a scale. It's got caps of Molly. I have no idea how many are in there, but they're already pre-capped. Like, it's just, I'm fucked. You know what you mean? And I already have a record. I already have a record. And those are still active. Like, I still have the probation in the one county and I still have the other case that's ongoing. So all he has to do is open the back. You're sweating bullets. Dude, no. Like, I was fine. It was the weirdest thing. Out of all the arrests that I've had, there's so many times where I've been nervous, like, fuck I'm this is the time I'm gonna have to stay here you know this time I had there it was it was the

weirdest thing I've ever experienced I was completely calm and it was like something telling me how to like react to the situation um and so this cop comes up to my window he's like a heavyset guy a cook county cop um and he says you know how fast you're going yeah too fast all right well you're going you're going to jail I mean you're under arrest as soon as you go over this limit you know we have to put you in cuffs I'm like fuck all right He already has a probable cause. There's no case, right? He just has to open the car door and go through the shit. So he puts me in the back seat and I'm sitting back there. I've, just for a sidebar, I've never watched a college football game in my entire life, ever. I've never paid for cable when I've lived on my own. I just don't watch TV. I'm just not into it. For some reason, like something came into my head and said, talk to this guy about football. It's the weirdest fucking thing. So he gets back in the car. He's running the plate. I ask him about college football, some random fucking team. How's USC doing this year? Oh, this guy just loves the shit. It's like his favorite topic. It's, I don't know how I thought to say it. I literally would never have said that to anybody,

you know, and the guy rambles about it for 20 minutes while he's writing up the ticket and going through the shit. And he randomly stops and he says, you know, you have a warrant, an arrest warrant into Cal County. No, for what? We missed court. Fuck, I didn't know that, you know? He goes, okay. So now he's got to process me, send me to Calb to their county jail, process me again there. I have to sit and wait until the judge is there. You know, this is the whole process. Like, I'm really fucked. But he doesn't do anything about the warrant. He sits there. He says, you know what? I'm just going to tow the car. There's nothing in there, right? You just got the duffel bag? I'm like, yeah, it's just my gym clothes. All right. Sits in the car with me, talks football, runs his mouth the entire time.

I didn't say it were, I sat there and listened. Oh, yeah, yeah, definitely. That's great. Yeah, a great team this year. I swear to God, they fucking towed the car away, didn't even call for backup. The weirdest thing I've ever seen. He was just sitting in the car with you while they towed it. Just sitting with me while he ran the plate, while he ran my info, all that. Drives me to the police station. They impound the car.

I bonds me, so I didn't have to pay anything, lets me leave and says, call your lawyer, take care of that warrant. Yes, sir. Walked out. That day, I swear to God, it's something from outside of this world told me how to talk, how to handle myself because I was fucked. I'd still be in prison, like today. I mean, we're talking.

That would have been the rest of your life over. How old were you at that time? 20. You know, I think if this conversation was a few months ago, I would have been surprised by the cop not searching, but after talk, we interviewed an NYPD cop, and he was saying they have the discretion to arrest you if they have an active warrant or not.

They can let you go. Unless it's like something serious, but a promise to appear if they run that, some cops don't give a shit. They don't want the paperwork. And that's fine, but he already arrested me because of the reckless driving. Like, that's a misdemeanor. It's already an immediate arrest.

Like, I'm already under arrest when I'm in the car. You know what I mean? And, like, I've never been arrested or even not arrested and had interactions with the police where they haven't run through every single part of my car. And it's like, the bag is the only thing there. He's staring at it. What's in there? Oh, Jim Close.

Oh, all right. That's the only conversation. I've never had that happen in my life, dude. Like, I've never had him not call a second cop. It was the weirdest fucking thing I've ever seen. It was like he was so comfortable with me that he was just cool sitting and talking and bullshitting and taking me to wherever and let me get.

And you weren't being an asshole. Fuck, no, absolutely not, which is also probably a first. So what do you think this is? Is this fate? Is this destiny? What is this moment? So, like, now I think it's, I've studied a lot of energy and spirituality and stuff like that. I think it was like a spiritual experience, dude.

I think something like gave me the words. I'm not a religious person. Like I don't believe in organized religion at all. But I don't know if you want to call it God or spirit or what. Something literally took over and allowed me to talk my way out of the situation. Otherwise, I had to have had a bigger purpose than the path I was on, right? Because I'd still be in jail. There's no doubt.

So that happens. Do you go take the duffel bag and start selling right away? or does your life change? I mean, I ended up, yeah, for a little while longer. Yeah, I still participated in it, but it was like before I had no inkling of like stopping at all. It didn't even cross my mind. When this happened, even if it would have happened in a different way

and I still didn't end up in prison, I don't think I would have stopped. I think I would have stayed the same, like doing the same thing. I think it was just the way that all these things went down, like affected me so heavily that it was almost a daily basis where I'd think about it. Like, holy fuck, I got it. off like really, really lucky here. Like something weird told me to talk about that. I don't know

shit about what I was talking about. It was just so like weird to me. I don't know the timing, everything about it was just off the wall, dude. You don't think you were testing your luck by getting back out there selling a drug. Yeah, absolutely. So why do that? I think it was just programmed into me, dude. It was all I did. Like there are so many years that I spent just with like the same people doing the same thing. And it was like for me to just up and quit was was like, was like, was like, like a far-fetched thought, right? I didn't even really like enjoy working. I only worked because I needed to show some kind of income on paper, right? So, you know, it was the very first time that I started to think about it. I'll say that. And it didn't take long after that for me to

completely cut it off in maybe six months. So I was like you learned your lesson, but you didn't really learn it yet. You had to still keep, you know, you weren't all the way in it. And I can relate to that in a lot of ways. And I'm sure a lot of people can too. They have that aha moment. but they still need to keep their feet in the water a little bit before they officially pull it out. Yeah. I mean, I definitely was thinking like I'm done. Now, do you contribute you eventually getting done to this moment, this like act of God, whatever you want to call it? Absolutely. When, what happened when you decide to do it? Like, how did, how does your life change? So I would say, like from a, from the drug perspective,

it still was pretty bad from a using standpoint for a while after that, like for a couple of years. I still had like a heavy dependence on opiates on like painkiller stuff like that. Like all that was building while this is happening, right? I mean, it started out as like, okay, we're going to do coke all night. And then the next day I'm going to take a couple of painkillers and then crash or whatever, right? Same with like X. People use it same way all the time. And so that developed into a dependence.

So I was already like not heavily addicted to painkillers, but pretty close. So even after I stopped selling it, it just became like, okay, now I'm going to actually focus on my career. However, I'm still addicted to drugs. So I'm still going to start spending those bigger paychecks as I move up the ladder in my career on drugs. So it was like a constant like push and pull, right? Like, okay, I'm going to remove myself from this group of people and like this lifestyle and then start to push more towards like work, right, or finding things that I enjoy doing and trying to strive at those. But I had this like thing on my back that's just constantly there that's like, well, you still have to get high, right? Because I'm so used to it at this point. Like, I don't think, I thought about this once

before. Since I was 14, I don't think there was a day where I wasn't on some kind of substance, whether it was weed or some kind of pill or some kind of like booze, whatever it was. I was constantly doing something. And I don't know if it was just, like even when I was doing heroin, I've known so many people that get addicted to heroin and they, that's all I can think about. They lose their house, their fucking family, their friends, everything. Live under a bridge for fucking how long until they either end up in jail dead or find a way out, right? I was never like that. I would do heroin and be addicted to it, but I would replace that with another substance and that was fine with me. It was like I just had to have something, almost like there was an emptiness,

right, that I had to fill with some kind of substance. So I think that stayed with me for a long time, like for a good, like two, three years after that where I was still doing drugs. And then finally went and saw a doctor, got help with it, and ended up on, like, a program and starting to, like, realize, like, you know, I don't know if you're familiar with, like, Suboxin and that stuff. So what really made it click for me was I got to a Suboxone doctor, started seeing, like, the people coming in there on methadone and having, like, a lot of friends pass away from overdoses and things like that, as is all happening simultaneously. And I'm like, man, I don't want to fucking do this anymore, right?

So I start on a Suboxone, and I cut everything else out. And then one day this guy was taking like four or five norcos a day for like an issue he had in the military, like some injury or whatever. And he took like a little tiny piece of a strip that I had and it blasted him. He was fucked up. I'm like, dude, holy shit. This is what these things do to people that don't take them. Like, and every day I'm taking two of these things, right? You start to think like, I don't even know what the fuck life is like.

You know what I mean? Because it's been so long since I've. have not been on a substance. And yeah, you feel normal on Suboxin, but that's normal to me. But a regular person, if they were to take one of those strips, would be fucking out of commission dude for two days. It's crazy. So it just, all of these things, like, started to add up in my head.

And I just had more of, like, understanding of this is not, even being on a maintenance program is not normal. I need to get off whatever it is that I'm using and get on the right path. So that's been kind of where I've been, sense. It's amazing how it just clicked that you needed to get help. But I mean, it's timing is such a big factor too. Like everything had to go a certain way and, and affect you and like going through that incident of, you know, almost landing in prison for a very long time. And going through seeing your friends passing away, it all has to kind of like fit and flow together, which is unfortunate

of all the incidents, but it had to work out the way it worked out for it to click in your head. And I mean, thankfully, it didn't happen to you. and you can make it through to the other side of that. Yeah. And to be honest, like that my dad has told me this since I was a kid, the most common mindset that you're going to hear from people is that it'll never happen to me.

And it's so prevalent, like, in any, especially like with illegal activity and stuff like that. It's like nobody ever thinks it's going to be them, right? But then, like, I had a friend not too long ago end up dead in an alleyway with his head crushed in and he was like going to be a professional fighter, dude was an animal, right? If that can happen to him,

it can happen to anybody else, right? Or somebody, I had a buddy get killed over a woman. Same thing. Just like banging a chick and the guy comes home, smokes him. It's like this kind of shit happens and you never think it's going to be you ever. And I was the same way. And it's like until you have one of those experiences, we're like, oh, fuck, this is really close. You're going to keep thinking that way until it does, you know.

Have you been able to make peace with your parents, like throughout everything with the addiction, the crime, all that? Yeah. So I've been really open with them over the last few years just about. what's been going on in general. I think they always had a feeling that I was like doing something as well as I can hide like my addictions.

It's pretty hard to hide being fucked up on heroin like you're like basically like asleep talking to people. So I think they knew something was happening and like at the same time my brother was like a whole 10 times worse than I was and he was on a whole different path that was just nuts like

overdose died a couple and had to be revived. type thing. Like he was he was really really bad. So I think for a long time they were so focused on him and I moved out at 18. So I never, you know, they never really saw me as much as him. So yeah, the last couple of years it's been a lot of getting back to explaining things to him and trying to talk through a lot of this stuff. Because I think that was like the biggest thing. If I was as a kid just thought about maybe I should talk to them about how, how, you know, rough this is on me or whatever the situation was, I think I would have been surprised at how much they had to say that was useful. I just think that I kept it all inside so often that it never came out to them, right? So they know, they don't know. I mean, how are they going to, it's not their fault. Have you had moments where you're on the verge of relapse or going back to any of your old ways? No. So I would say from like a fighting perspective, yeah, like I've been in a couple of fights the last couple of years even where it's just, I mean, it's pointless. I mean, that it's always telling me too that it's just, it solves nothing, right? Um, but, um,

And that's a similar situation. It'll never happen to me when somebody gets hit once and hits something when they fall down and kills them, right? Like, that kind of shit happens. So even, like, engaging in that kind of activity has been dumb. But outside of that, no, I've been pretty good. I don't even think about the drug stuff on a daily basis, typically. And I'm just cool, you know. What do you end up getting into, like, for work after this whole thing?

Because you lose, like, 15 years of your life through this whole drug addiction. and crime and ins and outs and everything, all the shit you were doing. How do you find stability? So a lot of that I contribute to my girlfriend currently. She has, her name's Nikki. She has her own wellness business. It's called Modern Zen Collective.

And she has taught me a lot about like how to learn more about myself and heal these wounds that are like internal and learn about energy and learn about how to treat other people and always approach things with positivity. Without her, I don't know, where I've probably still be in a tough spot. I've been with her over three years now. So I think I was still in a good place when we met,

but it's just been getting better because I'm starting to understand myself more through that part of the relationship and just watching her work with clients. I'm like, oh, wow, this is a lot of shit that I don't do, right? So, I mean, it's simple stuff too. Like she tells me all the time.

Just don't look at your phone in the morning for 30 minutes. And fuck, I do it anyway, you know? It's like, why? Yeah, I mean, everyone always says, you know, you find yourself a good woman and you stay grounded in that. I think it's especially true to individuals like us who have been through shit like crime, addiction, anything like that. Prison, you know, a good woman could keep them grounded.

I got an email from this guy the other day that listens and watches to the show. And he wrote me this very long email. And I read all my emails. I try to respond to as many comments as I can and the DMs because I think that's what separates me from other creators being very responsive and all that. And at the end of it, the last paragraph he says he's like, because he was going through his own shit. He's faced addiction or gambling issues and he related to my story.

And he said, Ian, you know, my best advice for you is find a good woman that, you know, you could stay grounded in and that, you know, you can end up marrying because the woman he ended up marrying changed his life. So it sounds like that's kind of, it's really helped you and kept you in a good headspace in a lot of ways. Absolutely. Absolutely. And I really appreciate the way you do your show as well.

think the whole coming in here not scripted and having no direction of the conversation is so good for having like organic dialogue and you were so responsive and like good with like figuring this out and making sure it all happened. It's just I really appreciate you and how you run all this too. Yeah, we appreciate you man. Now on that topic, how does it feel to talk about it? Like to come out here, traveled all the way from Chicago, what does it feel like a weight off your chest? Like, and why a stranger? Like we don't know each other. You just, you've seen that. You've seen my show, what is it like from an outsider that listens to the show that's been through shit? Yeah.

That attracts you to coming here to share your story. Because there are a lot of people that have similar stuff that are afraid to talk about it or, you know, it might be hesitant to. Right. Well, it's that, right? Like I want to try to reach as many people as I can, especially the youth. Like, if I had some kind of a mentor figure when I was younger, I feel like it would have changed a lot of my trajectory and who knows, like, what I would have accomplished right. By now, if I had a straight head the entire time, I was an adolescent, right? So I think it's a mixture of trying to reach younger men, especially, and just being out here and showing that, like, I'm, like, talking about this publicly, I feel like is a huge weight just because of

having to keep it in so long, right? Like, there's only a select couple of people that I've talked to any of this stuff about, right? And then that's a lot of weight to carry for so long. And I think just the combination of your situation, the way that your platform is, and how genuine you are as a person, I think coming here to talk to you and have actual dialogue and intellectual conversation felt a lot better as far as exposing a lot of this stuff publicly because we're having a more in-depth conversation than just talking about crazy violence and things. You know, not that people don't enjoy that. I know that they do. but the mindset stuff is so important just to understand from an individual standpoint. And if we can get to one person that it helps, it's like worthwhile to do all of it. Yeah.

I mean, and people want to hear about like the arrests and the drugs and like they're going to find entertainment and you spitting on a cop and then like those stories, you know. But it's balanced out. And this is where I think difference differentiates us between a lot of other creators. It doesn't just stop there. Right. Like I will sit here for someone for an hour, two hours, three hours, and we'll hear about all the fucked up shit they did, the drugs they did, the people they fucked over, all the crimes they committed. But at the end of every episode and every story, that person has, you know, they found themselves. They've, you know, reform themselves. They've made it to the other side of it. So I think when you find that good balance, you have something there. Like it's special in that regard. Now, if you could have a, if you could say, down or stand in a room with a group of kids that were in the position you were in, dabbling in drugs, you know, maybe against authority, getting into trouble, crime, whatever, what do you say to them? How do you persuade them to not land themselves at prison,

to not overdose or to not continue down the path? Because they're not going to be as lucky as you were. Right. I mean, it's tough. It's tough to talk to a group, I would say. A lot of what I do as a coach is analyze an individual and listen to their specific needs and then make a plan for that person, right? As a group, obviously, I'm going to tell them you're always going to think it's not going to happen to you, right? And explain some of these things and give these stories where I can, right? But when it comes down to like how I can actually help an individual, it's all about that person's structure. I don't know if this person needs me to listen to them. I don't know if they want to bounce ideas off of me or whatever, but it's sometimes just having another person there that's been there.

that's been there and has seen a lot of these things and done a lot of crazy shit. That's all it takes to get somebody to open up and start to change direction. It's not something that happens overnight. It doesn't matter who it is. Once somebody's already starting, they're getting their feet wet in that area, it's really hard to pull them back, right? I mean, Lord knows I tried with my kid brother, you know, for a long time. But it's a lot of commitment, dedication and just being a person that's going to listen and not tell, right, like that I'm going to listen to like everything that you're feeling and then start to give you what I think about it and not tell you, you should not do this or you can't do this because that's what fucks people up. Like,

especially as a kid, every time somebody would tell me, hey, you don't do this or do this thing or whatever, that pressure, I hated it, like from kids, from whatever. And a lot of times that would be why I'd fight. I don't tell me what to fucking do, you know? And that's the same with younger kids. Like if you're telling them constantly doing this is bad, you can't do this. They're going to fucking do it more. It's just how they're wired. So I think a lot of it just comes down to listening. Yeah.

I think you're going to be a great dad one day. I know we were talking earlier and you said you didn't have kids, but it's a life experiences, man. It's going through shit. Like people that go through shit and make it to the other side, there is such a power and a difference in that. And, you know, like I can't wait. when I have kids one day and I have a family and I can like put all of my life experiences because

I experienced a lot. I'm only 28 in such a short period of time and I have so much more to experience. I feel like I'm in like my fifth act of life right now and I'm just now figuring shit out and you know, I just can't wait to like put that energy into someone and do all those things. But Kyle, thank you so much for traveling here today. Thank you for sharing your story. And we wish you the best man and, you know, look forward to see. everything you have to come and offer to the world and see a little mini Kyle running around one day. Cool. Thank you. Thank you guys for having me. If you guys want to reach out to me, my email is Coach Kyle Hunter at ProtonMail.com. Once again, I really appreciate the platform and everything that you do

for the public. It's really good for people. Now, can people like book a one-on-on-one coaching by reaching out to that email? Yeah. So I usually am priced relatively high as far as market. But if you want to reach out and tell me your story, I'll work with just about anybody if I can find a way to do it. So it doesn't really matter who it is. Awesome, man. Well, thank you, and we wish you the best. Yeah, thanks, man. Appreciate it.