Locked In with Ian Bick - Struggle Jennings: How I Survived Prison

Episode Date: March 17, 2025

Struggle Jennings talks about the life choices that landed him in prison, the drug empire he built, and how he broke into the music industry. #StruggleJennings #MusicIndustry #PrisonToSuccess #DrugEmpire #TrueCrime #CountryRap #SecondChances #realtalk Thank you to LUCY & FACTOR for sponsoring this episode: Lucy: Let’s level up your nicotine routine with Lucy.  Go to HTTP://LUCY.CO/IANBICK and use promo code (IANBICK) to get 20% off your first order. Lucy has a 30-day refund policy if you change your mind.  Factor: Head to http://FACTORMEALS.com/FACTORPODCAST and use code FACTORPODCAST for 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. Connect with Struggle Jennings: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamstruggle/?hl=en Linktree: https://linktr.ee/IAMSTRUGGLE Hosted, Executive Produced & Edited By Ian Bick: https://www.instagram.com/ian_bick/?hl=en https://ianbick.com/ Presented by Tyson 2.0 & Wooooo Energy: https://tyson20.com/ https://woooooenergy.com/ Buy Merch: https://convictclothing.net/collections/convict-clothing-x-ian-bick Timestamps: 00:00:00 Serendipitous Meeting in Nashville 00:06:18 Influence of Childhood Experiences on Life Choices 00:13:12 Discovering a Lifelong Passion for Music 00:20:35 Navigating Childhood Without a Father Figure 00:27:14 Turning Point: Arrest and Intervention 00:34:18 The Search for a Father Figure and Vulnerability to Gangs 00:40:46 Reflecting on Life's Journey 00:47:26 Navigating Life's Challenges as a Single Parent 00:54:18 Legal Battles and Indictments 01:01:04 Journey of Music and Struggle 01:08:22 Overcoming Adversity: A Story of Family and Redemption 01:15:02 The Strength to Endure and Overcome 01:21:45 Transformative Moments at Riker's Island 01:28:32 Con Air Experience and Prison Transfers 01:34:42 Rebuilding Life After Prison 01:41:16 Understanding Empathy and Compassion in Difficult Times Powered by: Just Media House : https://www.justmediahouse.com/ Creative direction, design, assets, support by FWRD: https://www.fwrd.co Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Restrictions apply. Struggle, welcome to Lockton, man. I'm so glad we can make this happen. Thanks for, you know, reaching out. And, you know, it's funny how we met. Like, I had DMD when we were just happened to be in Nashville. And then Clever introduces you to JD. And then we ended up.

seeing you like a couple weeks later we came back and you know now here we are yeah that's crazy but you know there's no coincidence everything happens for a reason and uh then we had that other situation pop up and it was like it just fell in the place as it always does it really is no coincidence yeah no it worked out i'm glad we got to enjoy a good dinner last night have brand in here yeah man you took me to it took me to an incredible spot and that place was that place was great Connecticut pizza let's go yeah we got to we got to give you a reason to come back, you know, show good hospitality. Yeah, no, I'm having to, I don't know if I can eat pizza anywhere else now.

Is there good pizza in Nashville or no? Yeah, we got some good pizza spots, but that pizza last night was like, it was pizza. Yeah, you tried all the different flavors, too. You didn't have a normal cheese experience. Yeah, and you do it like I do. Whenever I take somebody to a restaurant, I love, like for me, it's Jeff Rubies in Nashville. I'll order every appetizer, you know, I want everyone, I want whoever's with me to try everything, and you did that.

That was great. So I passed a struggle test. Yeah, man. Not bad for a, you know, scraughty white kid that went to prison, you know? When you first met me, did you think I went to prison? Well, no.

But it doesn't surprise me. You know, I've done enough time throughout my life that, you know, you realize that all walks of life are subject to it. Like, it's possible for anybody to go, you know. It can be as easy. Somebody can walk a straight. line and have a bad week and end up in prison.

I've met guys that were super successful. And, you know, I met judges that had too many drinks and drove home and got in a car wreck and hurt somebody and ended up in prison with the same people they had put in there. So it's like, you know, I try not to ever judge when I see somebody at all. Because I knew guys like you in prison, you know, that came in and just had that good old boy. innocent look, you know, that you wouldn't, you knew they weren't out there just, well, I can't even say that, because I've seen some guys that were like you that were stone cold cowboys, you know.

Yeah, that's how they say Ross Ulbraid was in prison too. And he looked younger than me and even skinnier and everything. Yeah. And he just got pardoned and got out too after 11 years. Are you familiar with his story? Uh-uh, I'm not. Yeah, he just got pardoned by Trump. He was the one that did the Silk Road.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm very familiar with his story. Yeah, that's big. He was in the fence. Yeah, it's cool. You know, I saw people kind of giving him shit about pardoning that guy, but, like, you know, a lot of time for, I don't need, I mean, I guess he pretty much just set up the website, right? Or was he dealing as well? No, he just set it up.

And I guess he got that time because he was trying to orchestrate like a murder, but. But he wasn't, like, it was more like threats and there was corrupt, like DEA agents. Like, it was very intricate. But I don't think he deserved life. No one actually died. Yeah. Or anything like that. And there's people that do die that get way less time or sex offenders or anything like that, you know?

So that was crazy. I think like 10, 15 years at the max if you even want to go that far. Yeah. And he did, I think, like, 11 or 12. He ended up doing. Good for him. Yeah. Hey, all, before we jump more into today's episode, I need your help.

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slash Factor Podcast. You'll hear more about that later in the episode. Hope you guys enjoy today's show. So did you grow up in Nashville? I'm born and raised. Yeah, my family's from there. My dad's side, the family's from the west side, a neighborhood called The Nations.

And, of course, Waylon and my grandmother moved with my mom there when my mom was four or five. late 60s. So yeah, my whole life I was in Nashville. Were both of your parents together growing up? No, no, they were together, I think, until I was about four. And then my dad was murdered when I was 10. My mom was in and out of abusive relationships.

You know, she kind of liked the bad boy, you know. And she was just, my mom was so sweet and innocent. She was 16 when she had me. You know, had grown up, kind of sheltered. in the house with Waylon, which that was during Wayland's wild times. So she wasn't too sheltered, but, you know, she was private school and she had a great upbringing. So, but she had a thing for, you know, she liked the bad boys. Do you think you ever had a father figure in your life in that point?

Yeah, well, you know, my dad was really present. Even though I only got to see him, like maybe one weekend out of a mile, supposed to get every other weekend, but, you know, he was young, too. So he didn't come get me every weekend, of course. But he was a good father figure why he was around. And then as I got older, when he died, Waylon really stepped up to the plate. But of course, Waylon was also doing 250 shows a year, you know, in touring. And so, of course, then after that, it became more of the strong.

streets and the OGs and the guys that I looked up to in that life because my mom was working two jobs and going to cosmetology school. Wayland was on the road. So I didn't really, I had the house where my mom was gone a lot trying to pay the bills. So like all the kids would come to my house after school or I would, you know, wander through the hood and get into trouble and stuff after school. because as long as I was home before she got off work, you know, I was good. So, yeah, I had a lot of strong men in my life, in and out. And then when I was 16, my Uncle Tadpole got custody of me. And that was probably the first real, like, man in the house that I ever had.

And he had to break a lot of bad habits that I had. and he taught me what real work meant. He taught me a lot of things that now I look back and there are a mind frame that, of course, led me to where I went. Just, you know, you take care of your family by any means necessary. And just that whole, the neighborhood

and where I grew up kind of had that mentality that it's okay to do wrong if you're doing it for the right reasons and justifying a lot of the decisions that I made in behavior by taking care of the family. In actuality, when I went to prison, my family became the biggest victim because they didn't have the father, the husband, the brother, the son, you know, there to protect them and provide for them.

So that was one of the biggest things in stripping down all the layers and becoming who I am now was realizing that a lot of those. beliefs that I was taught as a kid were irrational as hell, you know? And yeah, we're getting, I'm just, but yeah, so yeah, I had some good men in my life. But in and out, you know, and really all of them were rowdy. Like my dad was, you know, a good old boy. He was a hustler through and through, murdered when I was 10. my uncle was a hustler, you know, that raised me.

My grandpa, Whalen, he had a super, you know, he was the outlaw. So then I had, like, uncles around, like, you know, whalen had, boomer and deacon were his security. They were big hell's angels. So there was a lot of, a lot of strong men, but, of course, a lot of them were definitely had some type of criminal behavior in their life. Oh, is that where the outlaws and angels thing comes from? Well, my angels and outlaws really came because it was all the men in my family were outlaws, not motorcycle gang outlaws, but like outlaws in the sense.

And, but it was the women that kind of controlled everything. Like on my dad's side of the family, my grandma, Helen, she had, you know, a house full of kids. They were all rowdy and troublemakers, but when she came down through there, you know, she would beat their ass. Like she was a strong woman that held not only the house, but the neighborhood together. Waylon, you know, being an outlaw, but my grandma Jesse was what kept him alive and kept him straight and kept him afloat for many years. me growing up and being crazy. My mom and my grandma Jesse were like the ones that really kept me grounded, planted all the seed, right seeds. And so it was always like a bunch of badass guys.

And there was always a woman that kept that together, that held them together. That was their rock, you know. even though the women were probably more outlaw than most of the guys. So I, because I was raised around a really a lot of strong, strong women. So that's where that came from, angels and outlaws. But, of course, I got a lot of friends that are outlaws, and I got a lot of friends that are hell's angels too. So I get shit about it sometimes.

but they know that, you know, it's all love. How would people describe you as a kid growing up? Like, if we had your best friend from school here today, what would he say about you? Man, you know, I was always, I've always had a big heart. You know, I've always been the guy that had a bunch of friends staying at my house or was helping everybody out. But I bounced around so much. Like, my mom was one of those kind of moms that every six months would be like,

I need a fresh start. We'd move across town. And I'd have to walk into a school, nobody knowing who I was. And so I was pretty quiet as a child, I guess. But I was one of those kids that loved being outside. I love riding my bike. When my dad got killed when I was 10,

I didn't have to go to school the rest of the year. So I was the only kid that could be out. riding his bike without the police pulling up and wanting to know why they're not in school. So all the kids that, the older kids in high school that were skipping school, they'd send me to the store to get the stuff they needed. And so I ended up, you know, 10 years old hanging out with all these high schoolers. And that's when I, of course, started smoking weed and, you know, trying things that most kids don't try until high school. I was doing about 10. Were you passionate about music as a kid because of your family?

Yeah, you know, it was, ever since, I can remember music, like, really spoke to me, like, really just grabbed me emotionally as far back as I can remember. And then by the time I was 12, I was already writing poems and trying to rap and, you know, sitting in the mirror, rapping and singing songs and stuff. Like, it was always something that I was super passionate about. And when I was young, my mom for a period of my life, sang backup for Waylon. So she'd be gone a lot and I'd be with a babysitter. But then summertime or certain times when I didn't have school, I'd get to go out on little runs, you know, ride on the tour bus and go to a show and sit backstage and watching him walk out on that stage.

And the people cheer and hearing the instruments. and the band and the whole show and then sleeping on that tour bus, I immediately fell in love with that. And kind of knew that's what I wanted to do my whole life. There were periods throughout my life where I definitely had a lot of self-doubt because of circumstance or situations

that I never thought that would really be possible. So then I kind of leaned into different dreams, you know, either being Tony Soprano or Tony Montana. but yeah but but music has always been super it just it hits me like i can i can hear a song and go back mentally and emotionally to a period of time when that song was out you know and i can i can i categorize times in my life with certain songs so music's always been really deep really deeply impactful and like my therapy. Are you stuck in a takeout rut?

You think it's convenient, but do you actually enjoy it? I used to order takeout all the time, thinking I was saving time, but it was always expensive, hit or miss, and honestly not that great. Then I found Factor. The other night, I had their shredded chicken taco bowl, and let me tell you it was better than anything I would have gotten from delivery. The flavors were on point. The ingredients were fresh.

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free shipping on your first box. Once you try Factor, you'll never go back to your old routine. Don't wait, get started today. Now let's get back into today's episode. Did your family struggle for money, even with their music success? Yeah, for sure. So, Waylon, you know, Whalen spent most of his money from when he was really popping. And, you know, he had a huge drug problem, $1,000 a day drug problem. And by the time I was five, he had had a double bypass, had had a heart attack. And so he quit doing drugs.

and through the 80s he started to, you know, of course he was doing good. There was Cadillac, Mercedes, Mansion, a nanny, a maid, guard at the shack. Like, he was doing good. My mom, I lived pretty comfortably in the first 10 years of my life because my mom sang backup for him. We lived in a house that he had bought for my mom and dad. My dad helped out when he could. But my mom didn't, I didn't really know much struggle. before I was 10.

It was kind of pretty much a good childhood life. Now, I saw some crazy things going to my dad's on the weekends, back to West Nashville, you know. So I kind of always teetered those railroad tracks, you know, where in one sense I had my dad, my dad's side of family from the hood, and then my mom had me living in a decent neighborhood. And then getting to go to Waylands on the weekends and see the mansions and the big, you know, the stuff,

and play with Shooter because my uncle Shooter and I are just a year apart. But by the time, once my mom got a really bad relationship when I was eight, she got married to a guy that was super abusive. When she finally got out of that, it was around the time that my dad was killed. And her and Whalen kind of fell out because he was like, you know, you need a she was jumping into another relationship with another guy and he was moving from California to live with us and wayland was like look you need to chill out focus on your son focus on your career and of course my mom was like she bucked that you know and it was like

you're not my dad because waylon was her step grandfather but was her stepfather but he adopted her when she was four so uh we immediately there was a shift where I went from this normal neighborhood to then we moved to Nashville because we were living right on the outskirts in Franklin and so then we moved to Nashville we moved to Hermitage so it was immediate shift in like culture shock right and my mom didn't want any handouts she wanted to prove that she could do it on her own at that point so we struggled super bad financially where she was taken any kind of job she could get.

She was still working on her music, but she was, you know, when started going to cosmetology school, you know, to look for another career. And my mom was 16 when she had me. So she was just a baby, you know, trying to figure it all out. So, yeah, we struggled super bad.

There were periods where, you know, she would break down crying when I asked her for lunch money for school and she didn't have it. And, of course, me being, a mama's boy and being raised by my mom and I lived in a single parent home my whole life. You know, it's just me and my mom since I was four. I wanted to help.

So that's when I started veering out towards hustling and selling drugs and gambling and just anything that I could do to make some money and try to help ease that tension. So I didn't have to ask her for money or so I could help her with money. And that's probably around 12. that I really started hustling and selling drugs. Did you look at your friends who didn't have to do that and kind of maybe have some envy for them or, you know, or just kind of feel like there was a lot of pressure and weight on your shoulder? Not really, because I think where we were living in those times,

nobody really had shit. And I never felt envious towards like Shooter, you know, who lived in the house of Wayland. I think I was always inspired and motivated more than every, feeling like envious there were times where I would be kind of like seeing people that had really good dads and I didn't have a dad in my life there were times where I would probably be envious of that you know just like man dude's lucky he's got a dad in his life I didn't have a man in my life except for whalen and you know he was gone a lot and then when him and my mom fell out of course

I got to see a lot less of them. But I'd still go over there to hang out with Shooter and see him and spend time. Like I had probably the best relationship with Whalen out of any other man in my life. Him and my Uncle Tadpole were the two biggest forces in my life that really made me who I am today. Were you thinking about the future at all in high school, like college, what you would do? Absolutely not. I knew I wasn't going to go to college. It was never really, nobody in my family ever went to college.

My mom went for a couple years to Belmont, but then dropped out because, you know, she was, she had a, you know, two-year-old son and was working on her music and stuff. So she dropped out of college. Nobody in my family ever went to college. So it was never really like something that I had a goal of doing or I was never persuaded. You know, I know a lot of kids have parents. They're like, oh, you got to go to college. And their bigger brothers went to college and all that.

I never had that. The neighborhood that I lived in in West Nashville, the nations that my dad was from, was surrounded by factories and prisons with our death row and our max and another Tennessee state prison. And then it's all factories. So it was like there. It was like you either go work in a factory or you end up in prison. It was kind of the mentality. And I wasn't ever going to work in a factory.

So I don't think I ever really, I always knew I wanted to do music. And I always knew that I wanted to be rich, right, when I was young. Not even that I wanted to be rich, that I wanted to be comfortable because I saw Whalen and I saw that house. And I'd see the Cadillacs and the Mercedes and, you know, the guards at the gate. But then you watch Scarface and they got the Mercedes. and the Cadillac and the guards at the gate, right? And then you go back to your neighborhood and the only people with Mercedes or Cadillacs

or the drug dealers. So I was always, always, there was two good things that came from that in that sense was I knew Whalen came from nothing and seeing what he had accomplished always, I never lost hope that I could have that. I always had that little bit of glimmer of hope that a lot of people from my neighborhood didn't have.

A lot of people from lower class or from hood neighborhoods, they don't really have that close of an example to really always have that guiding lighter, that saying, oh, no, I know somebody that really made it from nothing and accomplished all this to where I always had that as a, as a glimmer, I hoped to where it was like I never gave up because I knew it was possible. But also, it gave me the taste for finer things. And I was going to have that one way or the other.

Do you remember your first running with the law, if any, as a teenager? Yeah. The first time that I ever got arrested, a girl that I was dating at the time, I found out that she was cheating on me. So me and a friend of mine were drinking and I was like, you know what? I was like, I got to go out there and catch her. She's cheating on me. I got to go kick this dude's ass. You know, I was 14.

And I'd already been doing stuff selling drugs and doing stuff, but I hadn't had any running with the police yet. And he's like, well, you know, girls gone. Her parents are out of town. their car. Her car is sitting at her apartment. We could break in the back door, get the keys. I saw where she was hanging the keys. And I was like, shit, let's go. So we went, broke in the apartment. I took the keys, drove across town to catch this girl cheating on me. The guy was already gone. I ended up hanging out with her. I came back and my buddy was like, well, give me the

keys. I'll go put the car back. She won't even know it's gone. We even stole it. I was like, cool. Well, I guess he got nervous and ended up driving it down a dead end road and wrecking it and throwing the keys in the woods. But before he did, he drove it through the school parking lot and flexing in this stolen car and the girls at school. So she sees him in her car automatically police go to his house. He rats on me. I'm laid up with the girl. She stayed the night in my house. My mom has no idea that the girl's even back there.

because my mom was, she was young. She was a little naive. She's a gangster now, but back then she was a little naive, you know. But so they kicked the door open for Grand Theft Auto to arrest me. And, yeah, that was the first time I ever went to juvenile and, like, had a running with the law. So they just took it at his word for it that you... Oh, yeah. They came in blazing.

There was no evidence on it. No, not at all. Not at all. And I tried to say, no, I don't know. I didn't ever ride in that car. You know, but he had already told on me. Did you get off easy for situations like that because of who your family was? No, not.

Well, so knowing yes. That time, I'd say maybe. I don't really remember as much. Now, fast forward a few years. My mom was to the point that she really couldn't handle me. She was working. She was exhausted. I was full-blown gang activity, full-blown selling drugs, stolen cars, pistol on my waist, 16, came home when I wanted to, went to school when I wanted to.

And she was just kind of at that point that she didn't know what else to do. So she had called the cops. They came, searched my room while I was in school, came arrested me, found a bunch of stuff in there and like stolen radios, drug paraphernalia, you know. They come and get me and they were going to, they had enough on me at that point to send me away until I was 18, at least. back then I think DYD custody Department of Youth Development was like they could hold you to your 21 the day before your 21st birthday

or something back then but so I was pretty much about to go to Taft or Woodland Hills which is like our juvenile prison and it was literally like a scene out of the movie where like Waylon walks in the courtroom and they go back to the judge chambers and then they come back and they're like

we think he just needs a father figure so his dad's brother is going to take custody of him take custody of him because I was you know I was looking at drug trafficking charges gang activity firearm charges stolen goods charges unruly you know just about everything that they can give a 16 year old so at that time it really weighed in my you know in my favorite because Waylon stepped in and, you know, it was Waylon fucking Jennings. So that time it did help out. And I went to go live with my uncle at that point,

and which my uncle was like hardworking hustler. You know, it wasn't long. When I first moved in with him, I was like, God, man, this dude is fucking tough on me. You know, he's making me help him build cars. I'm having to go do construction work. I'm having to do all this. And then once he trusted me, he was like, well, just so, you know, we also grow weed.

And, you know, he was like, you know, he was that guy. He's just a hustler, man. And he taught me, though, he taught me a lot about hard work and because I was just a thug, you know, at that point. I was just gang bang, sell drugs, rob people. you know, I was just wild, and he taught me what it really meant to go out every day. So even after that, regardless how big I got selling drugs and how, for the most part, always kept a nine to five, you know, or had some kind of business that was a front, right? But I went to work every day.

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Now, were you using the drugs you were selling, too, at that time? There was periods. Like, when I'm 17 to 19, I was selling cocaine, and back then I was using. I was snoring about a half ounce a day, nonstop party selling cocaine, and really just selling enough to keep a stack of cash in my pocket and stay high, you know. That changed when I had my first kid. then it was kind of like, okay, I need to settle down. I've been kicking indoors, robbing drug dealers,

whiling out. Now it's time to settle down like an adult and sell wheat. Right? That was kind of settling down in our neighborhood was stop stealing and robbing and, you know, using drugs and get a job and sell weed. Do you think if you ended up in juvenile detention, didn't get that, you know, kind of hall pass or free pass? ass in a way you would have been better off looking back on it now.

It ought to have been ten times worse. Now, if you asked me if I would have not went to prison this last time, I'd be dead or doing life. This time it's saved my life. That time, I think it was exactly what was needed, right? I needed to go be around a real man that went to work every day, 5 a.m. to sunset, you know, and came and put that food on the table for his family. I needed to see that.

I needed to learn that. If I would have went to juvenile that point, I would have just stayed in that cycle. I'd have been caught in that revolving door because I wouldn't have had that good support and that good man to give me those tools that I needed because now I've got seven kids. And if I didn't have those tools,

I wouldn't be the father I am today. I wouldn't be the husband I am, the provider I am. He taught me a lot of those really good values. There were some other values in them that come from that era, those areas of poverty, that mentality, that hustle by any means necessary mentality that I also learned from him that, you know, led me into trouble. But as far as 95% of what he taught me was how to be a man, so I needed that. And just for people out there that are like maybe going through that with a kid or something,

Like, that's what, especially single moms, like, find a good man. Don't just write them off and let them go to juvenile and think that the justice system is going to correct them because that's a crapshoot, man. You know, I think the justice system is definitely flawed, but I also know that there is some correction in it if you want it. And if you're ready for it, you can get all the tools in there to fucking change your life. I'm living proof of that. but it really helped me to have a support system and a man step in because that's one of the things I was lacking and I was just trying to find that connection anywhere I could whether it be the drug, my plug that was selling me drugs or the big homie or, you know, anybody else. I was searching for a father figure so much that I would have jumped off a bridge with anybody that gave me that, anybody older that gave me that kind of love. Do you think that feeling that you're describing is what made you vulnerable to gangs?

Oh, 100%. 100%. Definitely. Because that's what I was looking for. I was looking for a father, man. I was looking for, my mom did the best she could, but being a young, single mother, working one, two jobs, going to cosmetology school, you know, trying to do anything she could to just feed us and keep the bills paid and figuring out life on her own at that point. I didn't have, I needed that

connection. And I was dealing with a lot because I told you that my dad was murdered. I just found that out two years ago. Well, I found out he was killed a while ago, but I found out who did it two years ago. When it actually happened, I was. I was outside playing football, and my mom called me, yelled outside, said, hey, your dad's on the phone. And I was like, tell them I'll call them back later. I'm playing football. When I came in that night, I sit down and watching TV. I hear my mom in there crying.

I knock on the door. She's like, I'll be out there in a minute. I sit down, I'm watching TV. I tell my friend go home. I was like, my mom's crying for some reason. Just I'll see it at school. All of a sudden, all these cars start pulling up to the house. and wayland everybody comes in

my other grandpa Duane they all come in they send me down and they're like hey man your dad's no longer with us but they tell me it was suicide so for most of my teenage years I was living with that regret that what if I would have answered the phone

like man would he have maybe still been here if I would have stopped doing what I was doing and just ran in to talk to him because he was my hero but at times you know when a parent calls or something you got to do something every day as a kid you're like I don't want to I want to talk right now I'm having fun I'm playing you know so I lived with that regret and I was suicidal and that was you know I thought that's how my dad went you know that's how I was going to go and so there was you know my dad didn't make it to see 30 you know I had that whole mentality um and a lot of it was

So I was just riddled with hurt and regret and wonder, like, what if I would answer the phone that day? Would he still be here? And it wasn't until I was 18 years old that I had been suicidal. I had, you know, done some crazy stuff. And my uncle's like, bro, what's wrong with you, man? I'm going to ask how my daddy went. He was like, boy, your daddy didn't commit suicide. He was like, he was killed.

And I was like, why would you tell me that? Why would you let me live with that regret? And he was like, I'd rather you live with regret than revenge, which brought a lot of closure to my life. But then it also opened up that door. It was like, damn, my dad was murdered. Who did it? You know, nobody'd tell me. Nobody knew.

And then it wasn't until about two years ago that I was sitting there and found out that who killed. him and I was at uh went to go see my aunt she was my favorite aunt she's was the world to me still is right uh she's gone now she passed but i come to see her and i walk in there and she's just like full of life on her last leg right i'm like what you doing baby baby she's like uh hey i'm just waiting on them to open the door so i can see what's on the other side you know and her son's like oh you're eating a lot mama and she's like And I'm like, here's the last supper, motherfucker. And I'm like, she's just in that zone about to go.

And I got my arm around her. And one of my aunts, I got a bunch of family around me. And one of my aunts has got a phone on speakerphone. She's like, your uncle wants to talk to you. And there's one of my other uncles. And he's like crying. I can't understand what he's saying. And he's like, your aunt's the one that killed your daddy.

Talking about my aunt who I got my arm around. And, you know, there was that moment where I was just like, I didn't even really know how to process it. But she had been, like, such a rider for me. And maybe because she was living with the guilt, that she was the one that killed my dad. And I don't really know what happened. I don't know what kind of, there was an altercation

or because she passed that night, so I never really got to get that closure and get the story or what happened. But I didn't feel any type of way against her. Because I've been through enough of, life that I know how in the blink of a moment, anything can happen, especially if they were drinking or doing drugs at the time. You know, it was enough closure for me to where I wasn't living with that sense of revenge

in the back of my head. Like, who killed my daddy? I'm going to find out who killed him one day, you know, who took that away from me. So, you know, it was another piece of the puzzle that was pushed in. you know but uh she had she had been such a light in my life and had my back in so many situations that there was a really like surreal like there was a really crazy emotion i had never felt it was like a calm rage covered in peace and i don't even really know how to how to explain that You know what I mean?

Except for it was just like, of course, after I left there that night, I went and rode through the neighborhood and got, I actually got out of the car, parked the car, and walked around and just kind of feeling that nostalgia where I was from because you've got to think at this point I'm not in that neighborhood anymore. Got a nice house, got custody of all my kids, out of prison, traveling the world, doing really good with my life. But it was like one of those moments where I just needed to ride back through and get out and walk those streets that kind of made me who I am.

Do you imagine if you were told that earlier, you could have made some decisions that would have derailed your life and everything that was to come? 100%. That's why I really don't believe in coincidence. That's why I have no regrets in life. Because I feel like everything has fell in place exactly how it's supposed to,

to make me who I'm supposed to be, and to give me the path and the purpose that I have. You know, one thing could have changed it could have thrown it all off. I had to go through everything that I went through to be able to understand who I am, what I want to be, what I got to fix, the purpose that I have in life. You know, I used to say all the time people ask me, you born, are you ready? And I was like, shit, I was born ready. But I wasn't. I had to go through all the shit that I went through to get ready.

And I tell people all the times, you got to fall in love with those flames. You got to understand that everything you're going through, everything that you've been through, it's just building you up and strengthening you for something so much greater than you can even imagine. If you stay on that path, you believe in, you believe in yourself, and you don't take those second chances and that forgiveness for granted. I feel like everything that has happened to me, some of my biggest tragedies, bro, they ended up being the biggest blessings. Times in my life where I thought I would not be able to move on from it or move forward ended up being the biggest blessings in my life and the things that made the biggest impact

that now give me the opportunity to go out and have that impact on other people without them having to go through it or letting them know that they're not alone if they're going through it. So I wouldn't change anything. There's some things I wish that I would have, there's been times when I wish I would have been maybe more compassionate

or a little tougher on somebody or, you know, but I don't have any regrets because I'm like, this is exactly where I'm supposed to be right now. I had to go through all that shit to get here. Tell us about your 20s. What happens in your 20s?

My 20s were wild. I had my first kid at 19. Did good for a little, you know, a year. All right. Kind of like working, just, you know, getting a pound of weed and selling little bags to the people that worked with me, you know. I think by the time I was 20, I was probably getting 50 to 100 pounds a week.

All right. 21, I went down on a case, 25 pounds, sale to a undercover. I didn't actually make the sale. I had somebody else drop it off for me, but it was set up. A friend of mine set me up. When did 15 months for that on a three?

Because I got two Class D felonies. It was two separate sales. I got two class D felonies, 10 to 70 pounds. Two to four, got a three on both of them, run concurrent. Going to jail 15 months right before I went, this big deal went down. I was already, my cousin had just got killed. My uncle Tapp, whole son, Blake, he just got killed. And another friend of mine had got killed in a home of Asian.

So some little things were happening that I was like, you know what, I'm a pull, back for a little while. I still had some weed I needed to get rid of. And I had a friend that was like, hey, man, I got these guys. You know, helped me do this deal. And first I was like, no. And then his girlfriend talked to my baby mama into making the deal. They went and tested it out and sold the guy one pound.

And then ended up being the guy wanted more and he wanted to buy a gun. And I didn't feel good about it. ended up being a setup with the feds. I never made any transaction or was a part of the deal, but the mother of my kids went down because she was there and she made the deal. She went down. She ended up doing like three years in the feds, plus federal probation and all that.

But they were trying to pin me to it all, of course. But there was absolutely no evidence. A little bit of some of the people in the case might have been talking too much, but nothing that they could actually, but they still hung it over my head and, you know, threaten me with indictment for fucking seven years. But so I went through that in early 20s, did the 15 months, got out.

The mother of my kids was fighting the Fed case. She was in a federal halfway house. She had been out, you know, just she was young. She was trying to feel. figured out, knew she was going to go to prison. So my kids were both, you know, with other people, got out, got them. I was a single father. Came out of that and did really good for three years, walked down that community corrections. Plus, I had the federal thing hanging over my head where they were still threatening that they were going to come and indict me on that sale,

or on like a conspiracy of the sale, right? Even though I didn't make an actual sale. But so I kind of had that hanging over my head, which in hindsight kept me straight. I was on community corrections did 15 months and 3 years community corrections on that charge got out

being a single father working, you know, whatever jobs I could get, restaurant here and there. And then life hit. You know, you're getting eviction notice on the door. I got a new girlfriend.

We start, she gets pregnant. So now I got another one on the way. I got two that I'm, you know, I got a bunch friends that are crashing at the house, kind of taking care of everybody. And I actually lost a job, you know, go to get another job and still got the felonies. Back then, it was a lot harder for felons to get jobs.

And fell right back into it. And I've never, you know, it always started with me being like, well, I'm just going to get like quarter key of Coke. Or I'm going to start with like five pounds of weed. And I'm just going to break it down and stack enough bread to get a new place. you know, pay my car off, put some money in the bank, and it just, you know how it is. It's like a revolving. It never stops like five pounds turns to 20, 20 turns to 50, 50 turns to 100. Now you're trying to go down there and pick up 350 from the, you know, the border is like, it's never in it.

It was always that cycle of just go big. And so then landed me. I have five kids. And finally got indicted my state charge, my Fed charge, girl that I had dealt with for a long time. We had, because I had about a six-year run, you know, seven-year run where we were doing pretty good, you know. Selling a lot of drugs, really nice houses and cars good, kids good. A lady good, friends good, family good. But I signed a record deal and was like, okay, I'm going to quit.

The owner of the record label, who is now my business partner, and one of my best friends, but his father got killed in a motorcycle accident. And he pretty much just disappeared off the face of the planet. Like it was super devastating for him and his family. and I took a step back from the streets to focus on the music and been down in Atlanta recording an album with drummer boy you know just really going after it and but of course I'm the label is like paying my bills

you know and I was still hustling a little bit on the side because it didn't always you know fulfill that gap especially when I had been running so hard and making so much money. But so he like disappears off the face of the planet. And, you know, so I went back to hustling. Immediately I just dove in face first. I was like, man, this is just, I guess this is what I'm destined to do.

Everything else falls through. The only thing I'm good at is selling drugs, you know. That was just that mentality. Which now, you know, if I would have took debt, fucking energy and my ability to lead and organize. I could have been a Fortune 500 company owner. You know what I mean? Like I could have owned a corporation with that kind of mentality that I had in that

hustle and that grind. But so I got back at it. A girl that I had dealt with set me up on an oxy cotton case. They didn't find the money. They busted the car. They didn't find the money. no transaction was actually made. She never got in with the drugs.

They thought they were going to hit me and find a bunch of cash. They didn't find any money. She's standing outside going, he just showed it to me. They didn't find the money. So, I mean, it's old enough now, and I already have done my time,

but, you know, we had the hydraulic arms on the dash. So, you know, you hit a little couple buttons and the airbag pops up out. on hydraulic arms. So when she got in, she was acting sketchy. And she had been my plug on pills. I never sold OCs. I didn't like oxy cotton.

I'd sell loratabs. She'd bring me 20,000 lower tabs a week. And in the bottle sealed from Watson. And so we had a good little hustle going on. It was a side hustle for me, but it made a lot of money. And she had literally been like, well, let's take a little break. I got to go handle some stuff with my daughter. She's getting in trouble.

We'll take like a six-month break and I'll hit you back up. Six months to the nose. She hits me up on MySpace. Like, hey, you ready to get back to work? I'm like, hell yeah. Like, let's get it. It was a good little Shuck move every week. And she told me she had the oxy cottons and I said, I don't deal with those.

I had a friend that had died on, I had overdosed on him. I was like, I don't fuck with those. But then I had two friends, one that it just came home from Iraq. And he was disabled, but his benefits hadn't kicked in. He was like, man, please get those. I can sell them. And then another friend of mine who's passed away now, he overdosed and went. He was like, man, please, like, get them.

And, you know, we'll give you this much money for him. And I was like, I was like, all right, I'll do the deal. And sure enough, it was set up. And so they let us go. But, of course, they came then and indicted me because there was no evidence, no deal went through. They took us in there interrogated us. They're like, you know what these are? I'm like, absolutely not.

I haven't seen those at all because she just jumped out the car, took off running because she got spooked. And so, of course, I had time to put the money up. They didn't find the money. And, yeah. So I'm fighting that case. Of course, you know, I've got a music career going on at this time. Still hustling. Like, at this point, I'm like full in, you know, five kilos, six kilos of cocaine a week.

Sometimes way more than that. And but when you're in that space where you're like, I'm fighting a case. there's you're in i was in such like a rat race of wanting to leave something for my kids wanting to make some kind of mark wanting to show that i that i wasn't um that i proved that i wasn't selling drugs you know that i was just uh i was just making music and you know doing good we started filming a documentary during that time I'm documenting everything I was doing. And then I go one day to take a piss test at the Fed building,

and here come the marshals. Or the, actually the marshals in the state. And they're like, state's got an indictment on you. 200 keys of cocaine, 300 pounds of marijuana in a school zone, money laundering. I was like, fuck. And at first, you know, because the guys, all my guys had got busted about nine months before that, a handful of my plug and a couple other guys, they had got busted. But I had just talked to him a few days before that.

And he was like, hey, we're going to let us go. The feds dropped the case. So we're going to get out this week. Well, what had happened was the state was pissed that the feds dropped the case because they had used so many of their resources that the DA picked the case back up. He got one of the guys to flip, and they pointed my voice out on a phone conversations. I had just been unidentified mail on the phone conversations, and they pointed my voice out, and it was a rap. They indicted me with them all. Ended up getting cocaine special amounts, 13 years, 13 and a half years, 30 percent.

The Fed case, ended up getting 57 months. Sposional run concurrent, but of course I go do my state time, parole to the feds, get to the feds, and they're like, oh, no, your time starts the day. And I've already been in prison like two and a half, three years. I think I'm getting out in eight months, you know. Normally the feds overtake the state and the state would have never even charged you and they would have just let the feds handled it. I know. They didn't do none of that. They both charged me.

The DA for the state, he was gunho. like he wanted to prove a point. I could have sat in there because they all sat in there until trial day before you. They all got less time than me. Some of them got caught with half a million. I didn't get caught with anything.

Some of them got caught in the stash house with half a million dollars to cash, 50 keys. Every one of them got less time than me. They got sent back to their countries, a lot of them, right? But they sat there. there in county jail for those four years. I went on the prison, got on the weights, took a bunch of classes, did my time, you know, and they sat there in that county jail, but they ended up, they ended up beating a lot of the charges and getting out because nobody was telling at that

point. What was your reputation on the street at that point? Because the feds in some of the articles made you out to be like the biggest, you know, drug dealer in the state, but. Yeah, well, you know, It was just, I sold a lot of drugs. I was good to people, never been robbed. I was a cowboy before I was an honest drug dealer. You know? A hard work at 9 to 5 drug dealer. Yeah.

Yeah, I was a cowboy before that. And so I had a reputation of he'll shoot. You know, I was always strapped. I handled my business. Took care of people. Always good to people. Took up for people. So I had a good, I had a good rapport in the street.

I wasn't a rat. I wasn't no bitch. Didn't put my hands on women, you know. No senseless violence, but capable. So I had, I always feel like I had a really good reputation in the street and still do, you know, even, even though I'm not, I'm detached from that life. I got a lot of friends that are still attached that I got to keep it a, arms distance, but they know that they can call me if, you know, they're in a bind and they need some help. But as long as they don't bring it bullshit around my house, my family, that's why I love where I live,

because where I moved to my entire life, it was like, oh, you don't go to Hendersonville. Them cops up there are crazy. They're, you know, now I'm like, they're like, man, you live in Hendersonville? The police up there. I'm like, I love it because you're not. Coming through it, you know, there's no bullshit up there. It's pretty chill. And the cops are all fans.

And they also really, they dig what I'm doing, going back into prisons and starting the rehabs and, you know, all the good that I'm giving back with what I did. Because that's one of the things that I realized, man, is like, I made a lot of mistakes. I hurt a lot of people. I don't glorify it. But if I can take all of that. and do something great with it. It's not in vain.

None of it was in vain. Going back to what you were saying, the feds did paint a picture that I was a monster or a maniac or that I, you know, it was also really, as me and Jelly were starting to pop in the music, people that I had never met, love to say, oh yeah, you know, I get my dope from struggling jelly, you know.

So it's like there was a lot of people out there. So they probably thought we sold to, that I sold and him to, to the entire city just because everybody, because our music was starting to pop. Of course, then I go away five years. Think the music's over with, you know. Jelly jumps in a van, sleeps in a van, starts. just pounding the streets, touring, touring, touring. He really, you know, took a step back from the streets at that point,

seeing what happened to me. And he had kind of already stepped away a little bit before, definitely stepped away before me because he started, he really had the dream of he never gave up that he was going to do music. And then that's all he was going to do. I had a lot, I was riddled with a lot of insecurities, a lot of self-doubt, a lot of irrational beliefs that this was the best I could have. Even though I still had that hope glimmering in the back from knowing whaling came from nothing

and made it, I never saw myself as half the man whalen was musically. So it was always, you know, those are two bigger boots to fill. but these fit me just right, you know. Did you and Jelly ever serve time together? No. Now, when we met, he had just got out of doing a year, day for day for robbery. I just got out of doing, I was probably a year and a half out from doing the 15 months, and I was on community corrections.

He was on probation, and we met and became just best friends. He went. he went away for a year day for day and then got eight years probation for getting caught with a little coke and a little weed as an adult, which I think they tried him as an adult on his robbery case when he was younger. But so he did a year day for day like right in the middle of our friendship. That was the only time that he did. And that was for a drug case where he had one of those situations where, like, the cops hit the house for some kids that were breaking into cars. And all his drugs are in the back of this girl's car. And he tells her, just get out of here.

The cops are letting her leave. But then they stop her. And he comes out there, you know, trying to tell them to leave her alone. They end up searching her car and his drugs are in there. And he took the charge and did this time. And then I went away two, three years after that and did a stretch, did a low over five. When you were in the state before you went to the feds, how are you treated in the prisons there because you were so well-known? Well, it was good.

Like, so, of course, I was gang-affiliated at the time when I was a gangster disciple, G.D. So as soon as I went in in in the state, I had to deal with that, you know, I went in. Got on count. I had to do that. I was changing my life. But, you know, this is one thing about GD is it has a lot of properties of growth and development in it. So there's a lot of literature and guidelines when I was a part of that that actually helped make me a better person. I know there's a lot of street shit that, you know, gets misconstrued and it's still a gang.

but the actual teachings of it are a lot about, you know, growth and development, becoming a better person. So when I went to the state pen, I had to deal with that, of course. My music was popping. I had dropped outlaw shit. It was just, it was going viral. People were, it had struck this whole flame of country rap, right? So, like the guards and the, like the guards and the, security team, the green team, they'd be out there listening to my music before they came

into work. They didn't give me any special treatment. If anything, they gave me more shit because of it, but, you know, I had good paperwork. I was a stand-up guy. I was on a compound where a lot of people either knew who I was or heard about me. So it wasn't, you know, there's definitely some moments where I had to definitely stand my ground or make some calls or, you know, but also went in there like, hey, look, I'm not on this bullshit. I'm in here to turn my life around. I don't want no smoke. If that's what it has to be, then I'm very capable and willing, but I don't want that. I want to come in here and do my time, change my life. And there was a lot of guys in there that had enough love and respect for me that they kind of huddled around me and allowed me to make those changes.

Like I look back now and it's the first time I've ever talked about this because you brought that up, but it was like there were some really good guys that are in there or were in there that really did kind of shield me to give me that opportunity to change because they believed in me. They believed in my music. They believed in me as a person. I had put plenty of work in, you know, and I went in and hit the ground running with like, I am going to turn my life around. I lost 140 pounds. I got the best shape of my life. I got the closest to God I had ever got. I learned more knowledge, got more information. I was going to the parenting classes and would graduate them and go back to them so many times that I was teaching when I left.

I taught the parenting class. I taught the health and wellness class. I taught, you know, like, I was fully programming because that kept me straight. I've always had something. I've got one of those overactive minds where I have to be doing something or I get in trouble. And I went in there and you see the different guys, right? You see the guys that are sitting over there eating honeybuck. smoking cigarettes, gambling, you know, getting high, probably owe half the compound money,

you know, and then you've got the guys that are going to the gym that are out there on the yard, working out, reading books, going to classes, going to church, they just carried themselves different. And I was like, that's what I want. I'm a father. I've got five kids out there that are suffering right now. The mother of my kids, as soon as I went down and got all that time, she automatically got super strong out. I started popping pills.

I was calling home. My kids had an eight all day. I'm having to teach my six-year-old how to make macaroni and cheese over the phone because her mom's been passed out all day and her little siblings have an eight. It's five o'clock in the afternoon. I'm hearing that my daughter's getting molested

in a drug house. I'm hearing that the mother of my kids is getting dragged into an abandoned house and almost raped until somebody saw it happening and went there and saved her. My son got run over by a car in the fucking hood, you know, because his mom was passed out and wasn't watching him. So I'm having all these things happen to me or happening to them.

And I realized that I had no control of what was happening out there. Now, I can call Jelly. Jelly's going to ride through there, you know, and drop off rent money or if it's some gangster shit. Like if I need certain friends to be there, they're going to pull up. But I really can't control what's happening outside those walls. I'm locked away. I'm in prison. The only thing I could control is what I did with that situation, who I became and what I turned it into and who I came out.

And so I decided to buckle down and work on that. My kids ended up being drugged through the mud. They ended up in foster care. The mother of my kids died from a drug overdose. I came home. I fought like hell. I got my kids back. You know, I talk about my daughter all the time,

and they're all success stories, all five of them because they went through hell. But she was molested. She watched her mother go down this deep, dark path. She was bounced around from place to place. She was in car wrecks with a drunk driver that, you know, they almost all got killed. She ended up in foster care.

She just graduated with 3.9 GPA honors high school, six months early. She's in college now, crushing it, working a full-time job, full-time student. She's designing the rehabs because she's in school for interior design. So now she's designing the rehabs that we're doing across this country after losing her mom to a drug overdose. It's just full circle. and it's so powerful and beautiful what can happen if you just make that decision to not let the story be told that way.

Because I was like, man, this is not the legacy I want to leave. This isn't what I want from my children. If I wouldn't have came home, they'd still be in foster care and no telling what would have happened to them. My 16-year-old, straight-A student, not even like A-minus, like everything over 100 honors, crushing it right now. Full-time job, full-time student.

My older daughter, Brianna, about to put out her, like, fifth album. Killing it. Works all day, works on a farm. Just because she wanted to learn how to grow vegetables and shit, she goes out there and works 10 hours on a farm, paying all her bills, making music, independent artists, dropping albums, hit number one on blues every time she drops.

That girl was her day. dad was a drug dealer and her mom was a stripper. Me nor her mom did any good. I mean, we were, we loved her and we were good parents, but we were, you know, we were good parents, but we made a lot of bad decisions. But she didn't, she didn't let that stop her. You know, like all my kids had all the excuses to justify following the same path that me or their mother did.

But they all chose different. Just like I chose different to allow that to keep being the reality that my family was caught in. And now I get to give that back. Now I get to walk back into prisons. I do it on stage too. Some people might get aggravated,

but when I'm on stage, where it's a sermon. You know, I just did that 81 days tour with jelly roll, and then the 40 days, with Brantley Gilbert, and every night I tell that story. I tell the story about my daughter. In between the songs, I tell little bits and pieces

because I want people to know that, like, regardless what you're going through, what you've been through, then it's possible. Change is possible. All your dreams are possible. You just, you've got to believe. You've got to believe in yourself, and you've got to put the work in. Faith and hard work is going to win every time.

And if you keep moving in the direction you want to go, regardless, what gets in your way? Keep moving. You're going to get there. And if you look at those obstacles and turn them into opportunities, another chance to sharpen your blade, another notch under your belt, another part of your story, another, if I wouldn't have went through so much tragic shit, I wouldn't be able to reach so many people that are in dark places.

So at this point, it's like, you know, I still go through shit. Like, I feel like God gets it. gives his greatest warriors the toughest battles. And I must be one of his greatest warriors because he piles it on me. But I'm okay with it. You know, Bruce Lee said, I don't pray for an easy life.

I pray for the strength to endure a hard one. And it's always resonated with me because it's like, I don't want it easy. What does easy really bring? I pile it all on me, put it all on my shoulders, because I want to show people that they're stronger than any addictions. They're stronger than any other struggle they might go through in their life. They can overcome that shit.

And if I got a sacrifice a little comfort for that, I'm okay with that. You know? Yeah. That transformation that you were just describing that happened to you, why do you think that doesn't resonate with people right away, all these individuals, men and women that are in prison? And, you know, it doesn't get through to them the way it got through to you. No matter how much we share these success stories,

it just something in them, that first time it doesn't take them that to realize that. Why do you think that is? You know, I don't know. There's a point in the Bible where the disciples looked at Jesus and they said, you speak to us so clearly, Jesus, but when you speak to the people, you speak in parables. And he's like, well, when it's time for them to understand it, they'll get it. Right.

So I kind of feel like everybody's got their own, everybody's got their own path, right? But I really don't know because I could have answered that different years ago. But with this fentanyl crisis, I'm watching friends of mine die. And I'm like, bro, you're still getting high. We've buried 30 of our closest people. in the last three years to fentany. Guys that we know were the toughest, they've been through the craziest stuff

and we're bearing them by the loads from this drug and you keep sticking it in your arm. You keep popping that pill. I can't even go to funerals anymore that are overdose because I can't stand the mama sitting there going, God, why? God gave that boy a thousand signs. I don't know.

I really don't know why it doesn't resonate. Because for me, it wasn't easy because it took a couple sentences being shot a couple times. I've overdosed on cocaine a couple times when I was younger, you know, buried a lot of friends to gang violence. I didn't really get it either. But when I did get it, it was so clear that I couldn't run from it. So I'd like to think that everybody's supposed to get it when they're supposed to get it.

and when it clicks, it clicks, right? I just wish it would click a little quicker for some people. And that's why I love what I'm getting to do right now because when I was in prison, a guy like me didn't come in there. There were some guys that would come in and be like, oh, I did, you know, six months in jail for a DUI 20 years ago and now I'm running AA, right? And we're all like, oh, yeah, man, he gets me.

He went to jail, you know. But there wasn't a guy that came in. in there that was like, hey man, like when I did Turney Center, there's four people in the crowd that I was locked up with. When I just went back last week and did Northeast Correctional Facility, where I was locked up at in the state, there were people in there that I was with, that I was in there with. I was able to really look at them and go, bro, you know I was just here. And I know you see me on the radio now.

You see me on TV? Like, you, you know I'm popping. Like, you know that now you should know that this shit is possible, but you got to change. And I get to really, I explain what I had to do, the beliefs that I had to let go of, the, the insecurities, the, you know, all the shit that was holding me back. I'm able to really give them that and say, this is what worked for me. Now with the rehabs, I'm hoping that I can do that with the rehabs as well, because we're starting the rehab, sound sobriety. We're going to have a detox, 28-day program, and then working with long-term facilities until we can get our own long-term facilities. But, you know, we're implementing songwriting in so that we can give them that outlet and therapy that I have of writing my feelings, emotions, and my story on the paper and teaching them how to,

to put that in the song form, then they'll have an agent that represents them that pitches their songs, right, once they've graduated the program. So they, songwriters make a lot of money. You know, hey, Morgan Wallen, pick up one of your songs, dog, you're millionaire. So, but trying to implement that in as well. And, you know, I just want to make any dent that I can. I know the ripple effect of me changing my life. How many people it's the, affected between my family, my community, even without my music. Let's take my music and the fact that, you know, I have hundreds of thousands, millions of followers, but hundreds of thousands that reach out to me and say that they

latch onto my music for inspiration. My music got them through a prison sentence or a divorce or back to their wife or through their relationship with their mom, you know, repairing and rekindling relationships with their children or, you know, whatever it may be, that my music has helped a lot of people. We'll take that out of equation. Just me coming home, getting my kids out of foster care, the effect that my children are having on the community,

being great kids, star sports players, going to college from where they could have been, right? another statistic in a broken foster care system if I can change if I can do that one time every time I go and speak somewhere I feel like

everything that I went through is not in vain and it's happening dude I just did Rikers Island crazy yeah I was with you two days before you flew out I know there you're telling us about that I know and if you watch it because it's on YouTube you can watch it and then I dropped it as

I dropped the live recording as an album as well. I saw your album cover on Instagram. Yeah. So if you watch it, you can see guys in that crowd, walls breaking down. Like it'll pan from me saying something to the crowd. And you literally, you can see it just like, they're like, fuck. You know, hitting them. And that's a blessing, you know.

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Do you think if you didn't have your music career start to take off before your prison sentence, you would have done your time a lot differently? Like, do you think that gave you hope to stay on track? For sure. You know, I got to give jelly a lot of credit. Because I don't think that it was my music career that really gave me the hope. Because, yeah, the song was doing good. on YouTube, but there was like this whole genre coming behind it, right?

Because I was kind of the one that sparked the country rap movement. And so I'm watching all them blow up thinking, man, by the time I get out, man, I'm not even, you know, like I miss my chance. I really felt like I had missed my chance. But jellies out there grinding in a van, sleeping in a van, doing these tours, going Bub, it's possible. I'm in Wichita tonight. I'm going to be in Omaha tomorrow.

You know what I mean? Like, and so that gave me a lot of hope. But yeah, you know, if I didn't have that hope, if I didn't have that dream, if I didn't have those kids, I would have done my time a lot different. Kids were the biggest defining factor, though, because I really, I really prided myself on being a good father. I had my kids in really nice houses, wearing really nice clothes riding in really nice cars,

none of that shit mattered. That wasn't what being a good father is, but it took me having to watch what my actions did to them and see them become the biggest victims for me to really understand responsibility and accountability and to look at myself and go, everything that has happened to me in my life is a direct result of a decision I made.

I can't be mad at the guy that's, snitched on me because I was doing the crime. That was a decision that I made. I put myself there. So, and once you find that and you get real true accountability, then you have the power to truly change and to chase and follow and obtain any dream possible. Because you have to take accountability, you got to realize that everything, if I get teaboned by a drunk driver, I could have left five minutes earlier. I could have left five minutes later. I could have took a left instead of a right.

Everything that happens to us is a direct result of a decision we make. And when you have that accountability, then you don't have as much disappointment. You don't have that victim mentality. You don't have that poor me, pity party. It's like, no, this is my life. I'm in control of it. What am I going to do with it? Am I going to get up every morning?

Am I going to go to the gym? Am I going to eat clean? Am I going to read books? Am I going to fill myself with the right materials spiritually to keep me sound and grounded? Am I going to be a light to other people? Am I going to be kind to every person that I come in contact with? Like, you have the decision to be the best version of yourself. And with that, we all know what comes.

Good attracts good. So I think that was one of the biggest things. that just finally sitting down and accepting that it was all me, that there was nobody to blame. I couldn't be mad at anybody but myself. And what am I going to do with that? Am I going to sit here and wallow in it? Or I'm going to stand up and start working to be better?

Was it hard to transition from the state to the federal prison system? Because you had never been there before, and now you're kind of a smaller fish in a big pond. Oh, is it? I mean, so did you just go to one prison? No, I was in Fort Dix, Danbury, where we were last night. So you know, it doesn't. Con air.

I don't care how big, bad, cool, any of that. When you walk into a new facility, it's a whole new feeling. Because you don't know anybody in there. You're like, fuck. You know, because you never know, you know. But going from the state to the feds, of course. Like, you know, you hear that the feds are sweet or different. It's not that big of a difference.

It's a difference in the politics. Some of the foods different, better commissary. You know what I mean? Because of the politics in the feds, the feds weren't as wide open violent as the state. You know, you got to go, if you want to punch this guy, you got to go talk to this guy's shot caller. And, you know, you got to talk to your shock collar. You got to talk to his shocker. You know, there's like a whole chain of command.

So it was different in a lot of senses. But, yeah, it was crazy. You know, they pick you up from the state. We were in a van. We went to, like, one county jail. They dropped us off, leave us. We didn't know if we were there a day or 10 days. And, of course, they're holding us in 23 and ones because we're all federal inmates.

and then they'd pick us up, take us to another county jail, worked our way all the way down to Oscella, Georgia, stayed there for a couple of days, drove us up to Atlanta, half the buses were taken off to go to Atlanta, which I think at the time had no lights. Like, you know, it would be like crazy. Everybody's like, oh, we don't want to go to Atlanta. I got lucky, got on a plane, flew me to Oklahoma City,

which we talked about, Conair, last night. I mean, you're like shackled. There's like duct tape on the plane. There is people saying I'm lying. There's duct tape. There's duct tape on the wings, bro. And you look around like, well, they wouldn't have all these, you know, federal employees if it was dangerous. But you look around, all the air marshals are like 70 with ARs.

You know what I mean? They're like. And they're out of shape over it. Yeah, they're like the ones that are like, this is a retirement as they're flying on this plane until they crash. You're in shackles. You get the little bag of water. You got to, like, bite the corner off and drink it to the back. And then they would do petty stuff, like, land in South Dakota.

We're picking up a bunch of inmates, federal inmates from South Dakota. And they're like, everybody off the plane and walk us out on the tarmac and make us stand there in those paper suits. It's like negative five degrees. While they do another count, that's crazy. But, yeah, so I went to Oklahoma City. Then I flew into, when I got classified, I went to Terre Haute. Was that a medium at the time? Yeah.

Okay. So they have a max, which is a newer facility. The medium that I was in was the one from the 30s. Crazy. So I come from a state pen where it's like state prison, you know, white walls, gray bunks, not supposed to hang anything up. You know, we'd have some pictures hung up stuff. It's not supposed to really hang anything up.

But, you know, you keep yourself super clean. And it's kind of just real, everything's uniformed. Get to Terre Haute and I walk in and it's like the old two-tier metal bars, all bars. There's like shit hanging all over the place. There's like it looks like people, some of the cells look like people have been living in there for 40 years. You know, there's guys tattooing with a cigarette hanging out their mouth when you walk by the cell. I'm walking in with this bus tub, you know. And I'm like, what?

This is something out of a movie. Crazy. And I walk in and I drop my stuff and I turn around. This guy's like, it's a big old boy. Got a big old beard. I mean, he's just wide as the door. Hey, what's your name? I dropped my bus time.

I'm struggling. He was like, I know who the fuck you are. And I was like, God, Dad. I ain't been here five minutes that I'm fitting to have to fight. probably one of the biggest guys on the compound. And he goes, man, I love outlaw shit and grabs me and bear hugs me. He's like, I was listening to that when I got arrested. I was like, oh, man.

Woo. Because I don't care, dude. Like, listen, I can do this. I don't care how tough you are, bro. You don't, like, it's just crazy. And it can get real dangerous real fast. And, yeah. He became one of my best friends.

And so my time in Tara Holt was good too. I got a job on the rec yard and worked out super hard, trained hard. And then when I finally leveled down and they would send me to a low, I wanted to get close to home. So they sent me to Lexington, which is a medical compound, but it's also got a low. And I did the drug program. I got caught in that where Obama did the nonviolent offenders drop two points. So where I got to the feds and I had a fresh 57 months, it ended up getting knocked down to 46 when everybody got those time cuts. And what was it?

2015, 14, 2015. I was watching guys with life sentences go home and drug charges and stuff. But I got 11 months off for that And then of course I did the drug program Which gives you a year off And then six months halfway house So I ended up doing two and a half in the feds Instead of the five

I did two and a half in the state Two and a half in the feds And they went to a halfway house for six months Was it hard to rebuild when you got out Or was it just was your career waiting for you Because your music was starting to take off Oh no not at all Well my music had

I only had one album that I could drop while I was in prison and I had dropped it right when I got to the state pen about a year into my sentence. Because I was in county jail for the first 11 months or so fighting cases. So I needed new music, of course. There was a little bit of a buzz, struggles home. Jelly was starting to pop a little bit. Yellow Wolf was popping. Those were two of my biggest best friends and biggest supporters.

So jelly was starting to pop, but he was still sleeping on couches and stuff. You know, his name was getting out there, but he wasn't really generating a lot of money. He was doing well, you know, enough to keep a fresh rental car and a nice outfit on. But this is really good. This woo. Woo energy. Yeah, you got that one. You got the lemon flavor.

Yeah, I got the living one. It's fire. Yeah, we're going to send you some of those. Yeah. Shout out to Rick Flair. So there wasn't anything laid out for me. I came home. Of course, I didn't have any money. Jelly wasn't in a position to just drop a bag off to me. Yellow Wolf, his company was, his Slamerican was doing good enough that he could put me on pay. So I got like $10 an hour. But I was in the studio, you know. Which we had to set it up because, and like I was selling merch on the website,

so I had like a little desk set up with a computer and shit, but really, I was in there recording an album. I can say that now because it's been seven years. It's not, you know, I can't come back in a rest of me for that. I'm off parole. But, you know, and there was artists that wanted to do features so I could pick up a little thousand, two thousand here and there to help out. But I just got straight.

out and I just started making music. I was sleeping in my brother's basement for the first six, seven months I was out. Then I moved in with my girlfriend, who has been my best friend for 25 years. We're in different relationships together. She's got two kids. I've got five. Her baby daddy died from a drug overdose, the father of her two kids. The mother of my three youngest passed away from a drug overdose.

And we had all been friends, you know, for a long time. And, you know, we're just kind of the two that made it out of the fire. And now we're forged together with seven kids doing incredible. And, you know, her kids, she's a mother to my three that lost their mother. And I'm a father to her two that lost their father. And, you know, we've got a really cool thing. And that could be a whole podcast on its own, you know. You got to interview her on yours.

You have to interview her on yours. Oh, yeah, yeah. To talk about your journey together. Yeah, no, I can't believe I'm about to have my own podcast. I did not sign up for that. It's going to be fun, though. I'm going to be calling you for advice. And you have the voice, though, too.

You have the voice and the look. Yeah. Like, when I first met you and heard your voice, like, on music and stuff, because honestly, I had heard your music before Jelly Roll. I got put on the Jelly Roll like a couple years ago, his music. But I had heard yours. And then I kind of, I'm not really good with names. So I was like, oh, I heard his music when I first saw you on Instagram,

because people would always say, you need jelly roll, you need struggle. Yeah. And then I Googled you. I was like, holy shit. Like, I went to prison. He was in the feds. Yeah. And that's when I followed you.

And, you know, it's crazy. Like, I manifested it, you know, like, and now here we are. Yeah. No, that's insane. Yeah, it's so crazy how it happened, too, because JD, uh, literally I saw clever. I'd just done the song were clever, but we had. released the jet. I saw him getting off the interstate in Nashville, you know, and he lives in Gadsden, Alabama. So I hit him like, bro, where are you going? And he's like, oh, I'm going to do this podcast.

And I was like, I was like, oh, okay, cool. And then he's like, he texts me, hey, can I, we're quick to do this doing the podcast as a fan. So he calls with JD. And I'm like, I know who you are, dude. Like, I've seen your shit on YouTube. And even when I met you that day, we, we. With JD, I didn't realize, I don't know why I didn't put two and two together that I've already watched a bunch of your... Yeah, because I had followed you like a couple weeks before and you followed me back right away. But we had never, like, talked or anything. Yeah. And then when the other stuff that came up recently, that's when you had DM me, but we had already met before and then everything pieced together.

Yeah, it's crazy, yeah. It's crazy. But, you know, there's no coincidence. And I believe that everything's part of a story. And, like, I'm really glad that I got to be a part of last night where Brandon's... interview. And I'll leave that to Brandon's interview. But I really, you know, because I was really proud of him, for one, for the way that he

handled and his accountability and his integrity. And because I know he's changing lives. I've seen it firsthand. And I haven't known him that long, but I've been watching. And we've gotten really close through both of our missions to. just help families get together, help communities, help guys coming home,

be able to come back and transition because we know how hard it is. Like you're just asking me, like, it's hard to transition back into society. Like we have to figure out our kids and our women and our families have been out there

where before we went, they maybe depended on us financially or, you know, we were the one that they called. Well, they just went through all this time with having to go through life without us. And we can't just come back and insert ourselves like we're the same person. Like we, you have to come in and you have to work your way back into those situations.

And a lot of guys come out and they get frustrated because things aren't what they exactly thought they were going to be. They'll have lists and dreams and I'm going to go get a job here and I'm going to get this license and I'm going to do this and I'm going to open this business And then they get out and they realize it might not be that easy. But if you, every time a door slams in your face, knock on another one. Knock on the same one. Be persistent. Knock on other ones.

You know, like don't give up and don't revert back to your old ways. And everything will work out, you know. Yeah. And, you know, a lot of guys come on here and they share war stories. And I really wanted to do Brandon's episode different where it was more about, you know, him getting to share. his story because sometimes people go do podcasts and that the interviewer wants the war stories wants all that and I knew with Brandon's episode it had to be a little bit different so he could have that opportunity to really be vulnerable talk about feelings and take that accountability

and I think he really did a good job doing that because it was a tough position to be in well for sure and you know as men and as humans and human nature and our flawed selves at some point right But first instinct when I hear, oh, this girl is bashing him and going after his family and he's done so much to do right and to fix his life. First instinct is like, oh, man, like, no, you don't, you know, you shouldn't put her on that show. You shouldn't. But when I remove myself from it, I'm like, this is a woman that's hurt.

She lost the father of her children. He's having to watch her. I know I lost a mother of my kids, you know. And you really don't, like, you can't judge everybody's, everybody's situation is not the same. And you've got to put yourself in other people's shoes and be compassionate and go, how would I act if that was my baby daddy? Just like I would urge her to say, man, how would I act if,

how would I feel if that was my son that had made that mistake? And I knew he was working to do better. You know what I mean? but I got to understand from both sides and be objective about it. And that's tough for us, you know. So I was so excited that her story got out there because it needs to be heard. And she is owed. She deserves that, right?

And those boys deserve that. They deserve for their father, his name, to live on and to be honored. And to watch, because I was a little nervous about how Brandon might handle it. Just because we're men. And sometimes our defense mechanisms kick in. And, you know, we all, you know, you don't know. And I was literally sitting out there with headphones on watching y'all's interview on the screen. And I was just, I was emotional because I was just like, man, he's came so far.

And I hope that a lot of healing comes from her episode and a lot of healing comes from his episode. and I pray that one day somehow those two worlds can connect because it would make that story even more powerful and healing and change for not just the families, but for hundreds of thousands of people that are watching. Yeah, I watched his initial interviews when he got out of prison and started getting online, and you just see a night and day difference

between what he discussed yesterday and what those interviews are. And I think that caused a lot of the friction out there too. Yeah, of course. So she was kind of throwing me under the bus because she thought that I had reached out to her. Right. And she was like, so when it got sent to me, it was like, hey, this girl's bashing you saying you're threatening her and stuff.

And so automatically go to her page and I'm like, I've never even seen this girl. I don't even know what this is going on. And then I saw Brandon was attached to it. So I hit him like, bro, what is this? And he's like, oh, that's, you know, it's the victim's mother of her kids. And so I immediately wasn't mad anymore, right? I was like, well, we need to fix that, which I haven't got a chance to reach out to her

because I wanted to make sure that everything was good because things can be taken out of context, right? But I guess she had got an email from or some kind of email from... Yeah, Instagram message. An Instagram message from the project that I was a part of. I don't have any access to that Instagram or it's not my project. I'm just a person that they are filming for the project. You know what I mean? So I guess she thought that had something to do with me and that definitely wasn't me.

I would never reach out and, you know, to anybody in any kind of situation like that. So hopefully that will get squashed. But I was really glad that I could orchestrate him coming on and getting, it's not even telling his side, right? Because the reality is when there's that much hurt and pain and stuff, it's not even about sides. It's just really about the healing, and this is what happened. And it's a tough situation. And, you know, but I was really proud of how you handled it. What's the lesson you want people to take away from hearing your story today?

Don't give up. Strive to be better. Take accountability and raise those babies, man. And if you got, listen, if you got a story, tell it. Like if you've been through some stuff, everybody's been through something. Right. We all get, I never judge another man's struggle because I think mine was worse or his was worse. You know what I mean? Because I feel like God only gives us what we can bear. Right. So a kid in high school, his parents might have got divorced and that was the most damaging thing in his life. But it made him tail spin out. Right. That's what, that's, that's his story. And that's so many people are going through the same thing. that you are. Tell your story, man.

And, you know, just work to be a better person. And hold on, man. It's a wild ride. Fall in love with the journey. You know, that's like my thing now is just fall in love with the journey. Think about a roller coaster, man. If you didn't know them tracks were there, you know, it's scary. But, you know, those ups and downs, man,

just fall in love with the journey. Life's crazy. It is. But it's beautiful. It's beautiful chaos. And you get one life that we know of. Just live it. Enjoy it.

Soak it up. Don't beat yourself up. If you make a mistake, get up the next day and just do better. You know, don't count yourself out. You're going through some hard times. I think one of my favorite things to say is the game isn't over until you quit playing. You can be down 100 points. But until that buzzer ring, the game's not over. Just have fun. And keep taking every shot that you can take and enjoy the game.

Struggle. Thanks so much, man, for coming out here today. You know, I'm really looking forward to continue, like, to grow our friendship and do some stuff together. Definitely. You know, get involved with some things. Yeah, well, I'm going to make you come down there and do my podcast. Yeah, no, 100%. And then we got to do a volume too because we didn't scratch the surface. And I'd love to help you with your stuff and everything like that. For sure. You know, whatever with your boxing projects and anything like that, I want to do more for the community and whatnot.

So I'm looking forward to it, man. Let's do it, man.