Loremen Podcast - Breaking the Lore 02
Episode Date: March 24, 2022Two BIG bits of Lore Breaking this week. Return to Yorkshire Atlantis and actual BREAKING lore news from Japan But it is all a ruse to advertise the livestream tonight (24 March at 830pm GMT) *Updat...e* It's happened now! Rewatch it here https://youtu.be/g0ZnFR3e77I
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Oh, Alistair.
James.
It's breaking the law time again.
Breaking the law.
Yeah.
Ow, I hurt a nail there.
Oh, no.
I whipped my hand against the desk as I said it.
Still pretty edgy.
It is very edgy, as is right at this new strand, breaking the law.
We got a good reception for the last outing for breaking the law.
Yeah.
Well, we're trying to keep our fingers on the pulse if they're not been smashed against tables.
And that pulse is dead because it's a ghost.
Exactly.
Exactly how it works.
A ghost's pulse.
Once again, people have been inundating me with links to a Guardian article.
Are the post bags full, James?
Yes.
The post bags, DMs, are full, have one or two messages in.
Will a prize be winging its way to the people who DM'd you?
Nope.
No, that will not happen.
Not allowed to give prizes anymore.
Even though we're not regulated by Ofcom,
we're still following that rule.
Yeah, yeah.
There's a great rule.
Alistair, it's your friend and mine,
Raven Sirod is back in the news.
Or in the news, to put that another way.
He's in the news for the first time, yes.
Yeah, everybody else is reading about it for the first time
and the law folk can be like, oh, this old story.
Yorkshire's Atlantis, I think you'll find.
Yes, I'm well aware.
I did see some great snarky comments from law folk,
like the article refers to the inhabitants of Ravensarad
as like merchants.
It's like, well, I think you'll find they were pirates.
I think that's ours,
and more realistically, your fault that people think they're pirates,
because we covered the story of Ravensrod,
a.k.a. Yorkshire's Atlantis, didn't we?
Yorkshire's pirate Atlantis.
Yes, yes, we did.
I think what they did was they forced people to land there
and trade with them under their terms.
Right.
Is that piracy? Yes. Well, I guess so. Look, they were pirates. they did was they forced people to land there and trade with them under their terms. Right.
Is that piracy?
Yes.
Well, I guess so.
Look, they were pirates.
I'm not worried about offending the people of Ravensarad.
Really?
Yorkshire's Atlantis.
No, I'm not.
Yeah.
Cancel me.
If it was possible to offend those people of Ravensarad, that would mean that they'd survived being submerged for 800 to 900 years.
Yeah, in which case I wouldn't really want to get on the wrong side of them.
Yeah, I would say you probably want to...
You don't necessarily want to butter them up, but you don't want to...
What's the opposite of butter someone up? Margarine someone down?
Scour them of butter.
De-butterise.
No, you wouldn't want to.
I enjoyed the Guardian article because of the main character of the Guardian article,
Daniel Parsons, professor of sedimentology.
Yeah?
Is there a professor of sedimentology on the plane?
Oh, no, I'm just a normal medical doctor.
Get out of here, you hack.
What I particularly like about it is basically it's the story of a man who set out to find Raven
Sirod and did a 10 hectare
search and didn't find it but is really confident
that he will find it next time. Yeah because he heard about
it of some lobster farmers.
What it actually says is
given the stories we've had from the folks on the lobster
vessels I'm pretty confident we will find
something and I haven't checked but
I think this is people who catch
lobsters are not vessels that
are manned by lobsters yeah or vessels that are giant lobsters yeah because the lobster community
in yorkshire is quite very insular there's a lot of tension there actually you know what we're
getting to a point where we could be offending the current population of ravens are odd lobsters
they could be lobster folk they could be lobster folk. They could be lobster folk, yeah. And now come at you, giving it all that.
Are you making a snipping gesture with your hands?
Clippy, clippy hand gesture.
So that's breaking?
Yeah.
It's breaking like a wave against a groin.
It is just like the real news.
I've got another breaking bit of news.
Oh, hold on.
I just realised I've got my window open.
Excuse me a moment.
So people are getting a free preview.
Sorry, I just heard the banter cops coming to take us away.
Bantz, bantz is the sound of the bantz police.
Clack, clack, sound of the lobster police on Ravensarad.
They'd know how to bind you as well, wouldn't they?
They've got some experience with that.
Yeah, and they've got the little portable jails. Yes, they
do. The lobster pots. I don't think they
call them little portable jails.
The people who work the
lobster boats. Get all
the little portable jails aboard.
Just a little lobster they're chalking
off on a piece of coral. How many
days it's been inside.
Let's do another story.
I've got some actual breaking, breaking law news.
In Japan, I'm sure everyone has heard about this,
the headline is,
Japan's killing stone splits in two,
releasing superstitions amid the sulphur springs.
That is a very creative headline.
It is, isn't it?
Good work, that sub-editor.
I don't know who was responsible, possibly the journalist, Justin McCurry.
Yes.
Which is probably where you would want a naan bread or paratha.
Justin McCurry.
Justin McCurry.
Good point.
Sorry, Justin.
So what has happened is, in the past, in around 1100 and something Western years, the Emperor Toba was the victim of an assassination attempt by a woman called Tamamo no Mai.
She was, in fact, a shapeshifting nine-tailed fox in the format of a woman.
Have you heard of the Japanese yokai kitsune?
No.
They apparently gained tails during their life,
these trickster fox spirits.
Right, so the more tails they have, the more...
The older they are, the wiser they are.
It's like with duck's beaks and STIs.
Like the darker a duck's beak is...
Oh, I thought you said how many beaks they have.
Oh, they're awful.
The older and wiser they are.
Like an accurate biblical portrait of a duck, just all beaks.
Just all the way up, like fanning out over, like some sort of mirror effect.
Yeah, like an endless recursive quack.
What was that about STIs?
So the yellower a duck's beak is, the healthier it is.
Whereas when they get STIs, their beaks go dark.
I thought you were saying it's like ducks,
they get more beaks as they get older,
and the older and wiser you are, the more STIs you have.
Yeah, so can you think of a fox that's got more than one tail
from popular culture?
Yes, I can.
Yes.
Miles tails per hour.
Yes.
Quote marks tails, end of quote marks, per hour.
Yeah.
So they are a sort of trickster god who was evidently employed by an enemy of the emperor
to pretend to be a beautiful woman and carry out this assassination attempt.
Emperor got wind of it, not sure exactly how, maybe looked down and the feet were Fox's feet.
Yeah.
Or she made a yowling noise at night time.
You can tell from the shape of their droppings.
Yes.
If it tapers to a point, that's fox rather than a local dog.
And the difference between human?
Smaller.
In the garden?
And in the garden usually, yeah.
So this particular one was killed or trapped in a stone,
which was said to release poisonous gases
but what has happened now is that stone split in two shattered yeah broken asunder yeah it is cleft
it's near mount nasu there are hot springs which are giving off a lot of sulfuric smells
ah right yeah which explains the poison gas, I think. The poison gas thing.
So it's actually quite a deadly area.
But this rock has, yeah, totally split in two.
And they think...
Who's they?
That the demon spirit...
Local authorities.
...may be resurrected after a thousand years.
Or...
Or it could be rainwater.
It was seeped in and then frozen and then cracked.
Masaharu Sugawara, the head of a local volunteer guide group,
is quoted as saying it was a shame that the stone had split.
I like the way the quote in the Guardian article is just the word shame.
Yeah.
In quotes.
He doesn't seem exceptionally loquacious for the head of a local volunteer guide group.
What do you think of it?
Shame.
Just one word.
Rock.
That was the tour previously and then we just
point and says shame shame for shame shame yeah so once again this was an elaborate advert for a
live stream again it was we're doing a live stream that's tonight that is tonight thursday the 24th
of march 8 30 p.m greenwich means time greenwich means time. Greenwich means time. Think Greenwich. Think time.
Oh, this is good.
So join us on youtube.com forward slash lawmenpodcast.
Or twitch.tv forward slash lawmenpod.
Have you got a story planned for me, James?
Oh, big time.
Yeah?
Yeah, I went to Norfolk.
Yeah?
I'd made a field report trying to find that blooming peddler of Swatham sign.
Twist is, I find it and I'm still annoyed.
Just, yeah, like all the greatest stories, you know, we completed the journey.
But in a sense, nothing has changed.
Basically, it's sort of a YouTube format Moby Dick.
There's a whole five minutes where I talk about whale penises.
When I get whale penises wrong.