Loremen Podcast - S3 Ep95: Loremen S3 Ep95 - The Pedlar of Swaffham
Episode Date: January 20, 2022James delivers a triptych of tales, originating in the land of dreams. Chief among them is the Pedlar of Swaffham - the story of a country bumpkin who goes to That London and stands on a bridge. For a...ges. Are the locals friendly? What do you reckon, geeza? This episode is brought to by those titans of the fruit industry, Big Pear. (This will make more sense after you've listened.) Loreboys nether say die! Check the sweet, sweet merch here... https://www.teepublic.com/stores/loremen-podcast?ref_id=24631 Support the Loremen here (and get stuff): patreon.com/loremenpod ko-fi.com/loremen @loremenpod www.twitch.tv/loremenpod www.instagram.com/loremenpod www.facebook.com/loremenpod
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Welcome to Lawmen, a podcast about local legends and obscure curiosities from days of yore.
I'm James Shakeshaft.
And I'm Alistair Beckett-King.
And I'm an idiot.
Yes, have you got an apology to make there, James?
When we recorded this episode, I made an error.
I did not check my inputs,
and I recorded it on a much lower quality microphone.
Was that error recording the whole thing in a well, James?
Basically, it sounds like no one told me
that I wasn't supposed to record a podcast in a well.
So we've got some poor sound quality from you,
but I think it's more than made up for by the quality of the story. That's the that's why this hasn't been binned off it's the peddler of swatham
hello hello alistair hi james i wondered can you tell that I'm pronouncing the D in your name?
No, are you pronouncing the D in Alistair?
That's very thoughtful of you.
I'm always definitely trying to pronounce the D, Alistair.
Since I came down south, I've noticed people making an effort to pronounce the D.
In the north, everyone just says Alistair.
Nobody made any effort to say Alistair.
Alistair.
I get a lot of Alistairs down here. Oh, look, it's Alistair. Here comes Alistair. Alistair. I get a lot of Alistairs down here.
Oh, look, it's Alistair.
Here comes Alistair.
Alistair.
It's the same name.
You should say it the same.
But it's spelt funny.
It's not spelt funny.
The other Alistairs are wrong.
It's got an alas in it as well, which makes me sort of feel a little bit sad for you sometimes.
Yeah, I think that explains my natural melancholy.
Alas.
It could be a case of nominative determinism.
Friend of the podcast, nominative determinism.
I'd keep it a well away from that friend, that so-called friend.
Why is that, James Shakespeare?
No reason.
Is it Shakespeare shaft or is it Shakespeare shaft, do you think?
Shakespeare shaft.
You think it's Shakes Haft?
It's the handle of a knife, axe or spear.
It's the same root as Shakespeare and it is that of a pike man.
It's not with Shakespeare.
It's not he shakes a pear.
No, that'd be absurd.
The guy who shook a spear.
Oh, he shakes pear, wouldn't it?
He shakes a pear.
It's like, what are you, a lazy orchard worker?
Climb the tree and pick them don't just shake them he's just trying to get across his anger at the texture of a pair
his mealy mouth feel oh i like a pear oh too mealy i once had a bad day turned around just by having
a pear at the right moment what i was really really down and i just ate a pear it was just
one of the best pairs
i've ever eaten and all the all the joy it absorbed all of the sun's energy and all of the joy in the
pear transferred directly to me hold on hold on have you been bought alistair are you in the pocket
of big pear big pear yes yeah if it's if this is a, we have to say on the podcast... This episode is brought to you by Pear.
Big Pear.
The conference pear.
What's a conference pear?
I think it's like a business pear.
A business pear?
That's the type of pear.
One of the types of pear.
It's the one with the sort of mucky coat.
It looks like it's got mud on it sometimes.
It's very matte finish.
A pear is like a matte apple, I-M- matte apple imho you can get some matte apples though
james maples there are matte apples now i want a jazz apple if i'm having an apple i want something
that's out there zinging like the jazz apple or the pink lady one of the ones that has a sort of
a soho vibe to it yeah oh granny smith she's a saucy granny.
She's got bite.
Keep your apples in the fridge for extra zing.
Well, I don't want to be too thrilling, but I have quite sensitive teeth because of the acid in an apple.
I'm already taking a risk.
So if the apple is refrigerated, it's just too much of a risk for me to take.
Oh, sorry.
Am I infringing on your pear deal at the minute no i can't i mustn't uh
talk kindly of apples i just gum down a pear and it brightens my day i like pears gum down a soft
pear i was down apple town you're listening to apple town the podcast where james and i discussed
in extraordinary detail the different qualities of fruits.
The orchard fruits.
It's just apples and pears.
If only there were a fun saying we could have used as the name of the podcast.
If only we had a Cockney on who was just baffled.
I think this has been one of the most to-the-point intros we've ever done.
Yeah, this is like five minutes of pure orchard.
I want you to leave that in after
this has been edited down to like 30 seconds of just us saying the word pear at each other
i can't believe i can't believe it's not apples i've been bought by big apple not new york they
really want me to point out that they're not affiliated with the american city new york it's
a real branding problem now i've got loads to tell you about alistair i can't believe i'm waffling on about delicious delicious apples and pears and pears i've got a main tale for you
and some subsidiary tales just gonna ease this in with a little subsidiary one if that's okay
i got this from the dictionary of british folk tales by katherine m briggs this comes from the
section called the supernatural it cites its sources really clearly, which is nice.
This is from a publication collected together by Augustus Hare
called In My Solitary Life.
Augustus Hare?
Augustus Hare.
H-A-R-E, like the animal.
And he wrote a pamphlet called In My Solitary Life?
Yep.
This is a sad story already.
I can picture his ponsne glasses.
Is that how you pronounce it? Pinch nose? Yeah little ones the little pyro glasses i think it's yeah
ponsne poor little augusta's hair well he was chatting to a mrs butler and he got this story
she lived in ireland with her family and one night she dreamt of a house a beautiful house and she
woke up the next morning and said to her husband i've dreamt of an amazing house i absolutely love it and she kept dreaming of it night after night and talking
about it so much so she would say that she would count the hours until bedtime that she may get
back to the house wow that is almost rude to her husband i think yeah well her family apparently
started taking a mickey out of her for this house as well so maybe it was a little bit of a
riposte to that.
Away up to bed to spend some time in the house, are you?
That's what they might have said.
Ah, she's always after going to the imaginary house of dreams.
She's after sleeping her life away, isn't she?
I was just trying to lure you into doing your Irish accent there, James.
That's all I was trying to do.
Unfortunately, I don't think these are accurate accents for Mrs. Butler,
because the next part of the story says that the butlers grew weary of their life in Ireland.
And I quote, the district was wild and disturbed.
The people were insolent and ungrateful.
I think it sounds like Ireland grew weary of the butlers there.
Yeah, I'm very much on the side of the insolent Irish people in this case.
Yeah, me too.
I don't find that very plausible.
Why did you leave that area?
Ah, just insolence.
The general insolence of the people there.
The lack of gratefulness.
So they went looking in that London for houses.
And they went to view a surprisingly cheap house in hampshire i love surprisingly
cheap houses you are just guaranteed body in the wall if you're getting a surprisingly cheap house
well as they came up to it she's like this is my dream house when they were getting shown around
by the housekeeper she actually started showing the housekeeper around the house saying oh the
conservatory's through here down here we've got the pantry the pantry. Which is amazing, but also sounds really annoying.
Don't show the housekeeper around her own house.
If you've ever dealt with estate agents,
sometimes you do have to do their job for them.
They came across a door in an upstairs passage
that she didn't recognise.
And she said, but that door isn't in my house.
And the housekeeper said,
I don't know what you're talking about,
about the your house thing,
but this is a new door.
It's only been here six weeks.
And then they started to inquire as to why the house was so oddly cheap.
Oh, it's important to point out here, when they arrived at the house,
the housekeeper had slightly sort of jumped.
She'd been a little startled.
Oh, of course, the other people have come to see the house.
Oh, I beg your pardon.
Oh, oh, my goodness.
Yes. Oh, is it today already? Please don't interpret see the house. Oh, I beg your pardon. Oh, my goodness. Yes.
Oh, is it today already?
Please don't interpret this as insolence or ungratefulness.
Please don't interpret this as foreboding in any way.
So they asked why so cheap and the housekeeper said,
it's because the house is haunted.
Wow, she just came out and said it.
She just came straight out and said it.
And she said, but you guys don't need to worry because the ghost that haunts it, Mrs. Butler, is haunted. Wow, she just came out and said it. She just came straight out and said it. And she said, but you guys don't need to worry
because the ghost that haunts it, Mrs. Butler,
is you.
What?
Hold on. I'm confused.
I was scared and shocked
and now I'm confused. The ghost that
haunts it, Mrs. Butler, is you. Yeah.
So when she'd been dreaming about the house,
she'd been in the house as a spirit.
She was the ghost when
she was asleep yeah but it was an alive mrs butler who was asleep they didn't know about
mrs butler and the need for silence and gratefulness around her so the housekeeper had
seen mrs butler wandering around the house as a ghost night after night and presumed that was a
ghost as you would or probably a break-in so Mrs. Putler was gifted with the capacity for astral projection.
Yes.
And she used it to get a head start in the London property market.
For house hunting.
Which can be very competitive.
Her astral projection has been made redundant by Zoopla.
We're not affiliated with Zoopla.
Nah, just have a pear and don't think about it.
Have a lovely, lovely, refreshingla yeah just have a pear and don't think about it have a lovely love
refreshing pear just have a delicious have a horrible mealy wet pear that was one of my
little amuse bouches because today alistair i want to talk to you about dreams like hopes for
the future one day someone might listen to an episode of this podcast i mean there's dreams
and then there's fantasies oh okay okay okay, okay. All right, sorry.
I completely disagree when people say that it's boring to hear about other people's dreams.
You don't agree with that?
Not at all.
Not one, not a jot.
I love it.
People seem to forget that they're basically just giving you a glimpse into their subconscious
and you can just be all total judgy on them and their internal thought.
I think it's great fun.
Like if someone tells you they
had a dream that they bit into a delicious apple but their teeth were made out of soft cheese and
just smeared on the apple yeah you're like oh i see what's happening here you want to you want
a lovely lovely pear they're softer gum down their mealy mealy flesh look the agreed wording
with big pear was not gum down the mealy flesh so steer clear
of gum down altogether while dreaming i did once invent the popular quiz show format basist or
racist i think we've talked about this before because i've talked about i had a chat with
someone who told me a joke in my dreams and i've been too afraid to tell that joke for fear of
being accused of plagiarism so you heard the joke in your dream yeah it was about the guy that invented the
automatic gearbox who insisted on naming after himself but his name was emmanuel
and it never took off or something like that i think we were you know spitballing the idea
so i think to be honest i have some claim to that joke yeah once it becomes a joke
if i at any point Once it becomes a joke.
If I at any point turn it into a joke.
Have we talked about basist or racist on the podcast before then?
I feel like we have.
I feel like we might have.
Yeah.
So it's okay.
It's copyrighted.
Maybe we dreamt we talked about it in the dream podcast record. I mean, I forget.
Just like you forget a dream the moment you wake up.
I forget everything in every episode of the podcast the instant it's released.
So that was a tale called the dream house mrs butler did manage to buy her dream house the dream house thing is a big part of hey we're going to help you find your dream house
yeah because my dream house turns into a hotel halfway through that hasn't got any stairs in it
and is also being attacked by sort of malevolent gremlins. Kind of a combination of Lord of the Rings 3 and Fawlty Towers.
Absolutely nobody calls it Lord of the Rings 3.
I've no idea what film you mean.
That's the first time anybody has said those words.
Lord of the Rings 3.
Lord of the Rings 3, the one with all the fighting in it.
Lord of the Rings 3?
With all the fighting in it.
I think you mean Return of the King.
I don't even like these films and you're making me seem like a nerd.
I don't like these films.
Lord of the Rings 3, the Kingening. Lord of the King. I don't even like these films, and you're making me seem like a nerd. I don't like these films. Lord of the Rings 3, The Kingening.
Lord of the Rings 3, the one with all the endings.
Okay, so the main story I want to tell you is the peddler of Swatham.
Swatham?
I hardly know him.
Sorry.
Carry on.
Where's Swatham?
I only know of Swatham from Alan Partridge, so i assume it's in norfolk ah so we're out east
on england's bun yeah the bun of the witch's head if you follow my directions is in norfolk and
in swatham there lived a peddler what is a peddler it's someone who sells trinkets and things
peddling is just selling not a cyclist not. Not a cyclist. It's even spelt differently. Yeah, it is.
Goes around, little blanket, lays
out their wares, pedals the wares.
Pedals them wares. Yeah. Anyway, so, oh,
by the way, this is from Abraham
Della Prime's diary.
Abraham Della Prime!
You are knocking it out of the park
with the names of
the people who wrote this nonsense.
Peddler of Swatham, I think this is a reasonably well-known tale,
but I'd never heard it before, and I presume you haven't,
because you haven't gone, oh, yeah, I know that.
Never heard of it.
So there was a guy from Swatham, a peddler,
and he dreamt that if he went to London Bridge and stood there,
he'd hear very joyful news.
Okay, that's vague.
And at first he thought, nah, that's weird.
Then he dreamt the dream again and again.
It also sounds like it's just that someone told him about this in the dream.
Yeah.
He doesn't know what the news is.
It's more like someone comes in and goes,
if you go to London Bridge, you're going to hear some good news,
rather than he dreamt that he went to London Bridge and heard good news.
Yeah, it's hard to communicate the good news
without being specific about what the good news is.
Mm, exactly.
This vexed him so much, he decided to go to that London
and go to that London Bridge. Presumably, first so much, he decided to go to that London and go to that London Bridge.
Presumably, first of all, he went to Tower Bridge.
Yeah, a bit of confusion there.
Went to the very boring London Bridge.
Well, actually, he probably would have come into Liverpool Street.
Yeah.
I would think, if he's in Norfolk.
Checks out.
And then just Central Line to Bank.
Yeah, I reckon, yeah.
And then Northern Line down to London Bridge.
Yeah.
It could be just as quick to get the bus from Liverpool Street
if he was there in the middle of the day.
If he can avoid rush hour, he could save time and avoid the tube.
He's not going to have downloaded a London bus app before he goes.
No.
I think he's just going to get there, get straight on the tube.
That's what you do.
Yeah, all right.
Yeah, okay.
If you're coming from out of town.
Yeah.
Maybe he just banged it into Google Maps.
It doesn't specify, but he did end up at the bridge.
He says he stood on the bridge
for two or three days.
Wow.
I've got a strong sense
of how swiftly his good news arrived.
And he says,
looking about him,
but heard nothing
that might yield him any comfort.
A hopeful expression on his face.
Like hen parties in limousines
going about.
I think he might have tried peddling because a local shopkeeper saw him would this be at the time when they had shops on
london bridge maybe because i think my understanding is the bridges of london tended to be full of
booths like wooden huts so that they were lined either side with stalls.
So selling something on the bridge wasn't a crazy idea.
What this shopkeeper noted, his fruitless standing.
He should have given him a peg.
Yeah, a real run up for that one, yeah.
And seeing that he neither sold any wares nor asked any alms.
So he wasn't selling, he wasn't begging.
He was just standing, hopefully.
Standing, looking around.
For two or three days.
So the shopkeeper begged to know what he was doing there,
what his business was.
And the peddler answered him honestly.
Oi, mate, what are you playing at?
I dreamt that if I come to London, go to London Bridge,
I'm going to hear some good news.
To which the shopkeeper laughed heartily.
Yep, now that shopkeeper's a true Londoner.
He was like, you can't be serious.
Did you really come all the way on the train and then tube
without downloading the bus app just because of a dream?
Asked him if he was such a fool as to take a journey on such a silly errand,
adding, I'll tell thee, country fellow.
I'll do this in the voice.
Yes, could you do one of your classic acting school roles, James?
I'll tell thee, country fellow.
Last night I dreamt that I was in Swatham in Norfolk,
a place utterly unknown to me,
where me fought behind a peddler's house in a certain orchard
and under a great oak tree.
If I digged, I should find a vast treasure now
think you that i am such a fool as to take a long journey upon me upon the instigation of such a
silly dream no no i'm wiser therefore good fellow learn wit from me and get you home and mind your
business wow so his dream was like a dream gazumping of the other guy's
dream so this peddler from swatham yeah he went home he went to the orchard behind his house he
went to the big oak tree in the orchard behind his house and he started digging and he found a
massive treasure and grew exceedingly rich was Was that treasure pear seeds? It being an orchard.
The Londoner's dream was the good news.
The Londoner, cocky Londoner,
thought he was getting won over.
It seems unfair to me,
because the Londoner was given that dream.
Okay, he didn't follow it.
Why not just give this guy a dream
that there's a treasure in your back garden
and cut out the middleman?
Well, I think they wanted to show the ease
in which you can catch a train from Swatham
with also sponsored by train.
Well, he grew rich and he rebuilt Swatham Church
and there's a statue of him with a pack on his back,
a dog at his heels,
and his memory is preserved in one of the old glass windows.
Oh, sorry.
And his memory is also preserved in most of the old glass windows in oh sorry and his memory is also preserved in most
of the old glass windows taverns and ale houses of that town and to this day he's in a lot of them
in most windows there's a picture of this guy in swatham wow so if we have any any swatham
correspondence any swathites can they back up that the peddler was there getting one over
on a cheeky london cockney and there is the end of my tale of the peddler was there getting one over on a cheeky London cockney?
And there is the end of my tale of the Peddler of Swatham.
Terrific tale.
Okay, there's another story of dreams that I've heard about.
I've only found it in one book called Forgotten Folk Tales of the English Counties.
Written by Zebediah Pike.
Collected by Ruth L. Tongue.
Oh, yeah.
The Tongue-ster.
So this story, this is a Romany legend,
and I've also heard it's incredibly bad luck to talk about it.
Oh.
So if you don't want to hear this, if you don't want to hear this bad luck,
skip on three minutes and we'll not bring it up in the scores.
I'm quite excited, but now I'm a little bit nervous.
It's just an amazing story.
Let's hear it.
So what it is, it's called The Maple Durham Treasure
and it is a series of dreams that people have.
The dreams occur approximately every 25 or 30 years
and they've been noted going back 100 years
and this book is written in the 70s.
So in 1900, it was dreamt about in Berkshire
and in Tame in Oxfordshire.
In the 40s, it was dreamt about.
In Buckinghamshire, Exmoor.
In the late 60s, it was dreamt about in Somerset, London and Devonshire.
So I think there would have been another one in the late 90s and then we're due another one around now.
Yeah, we're due.
And what it is is that someone dreams about a treasure
and it is specifically a treasure on or related to a donkey donkey and
there's drawings here of that it's either gold bars that are kind of wrapped up or it's like a
pack horse satchel with the sides splitting and jewels and gold kind of sticking out a donkey
treasure like old school money bags in black leather and they have drawstrings
on them and one there's three and one of them's fallen over and the gold is coming out yeah the
golden age of the money bag really has passed hasn't it thought to be maybe a roman treasure
that got lost in a bog and it's considered to be bad luck to go to dream about it or go and find it. And yeah, it's that big a deal that it comes around every 30 years.
Someone dreams of this treasure two or three times in a year.
Wow, that's really good.
That's got like weird fiction vibes to it.
It feels like it could be on like a comet that keeps passing the planet, sending out dreams.
Yeah, very peculiar.
I like it.
And it's like Rokos Basilisk, like you're not allowed to talk about it.
Don't mug it off.
What about if he talks about it, but in a good way, like bigging him up?
It interests me that you said the point of Rokos Basilisk is that you're not allowed
to think about it, not that people are mugging it off.
Yes, you can't mug it off.
They're not mugging it off.
It's like the game.
P.S. I just lost the game.
It is exactly, yes.
It's the game, but for people who invest in crypto.
Right, Alistair, are you ready to score me?
It would be a dream.
Oh, lovely.
See?
Yeah?
Yeah.
Excellent.
Yes, I am.
What is your first category?
Names.
They were good.
Weren't they just?
They were good.
What was it?
Augustus Hare.
He's a giant rabbit.
Rabbits aren't hares.
I know, I know.
He's got his little piece of nares on his nose and they're jumping around though because it's twitching so.
Yeah, and a pocket watch.
Just a waistcoat.
No other clothes.
Yogi Bear style.
All the bears.
Winnie the Pooh.
They were bear bears.
All the top bears just wear, just on the top.
The top bears
are bottom bear.
Top bear,
bottom bear.
The top bears
are bear bear bottoms.
Are we just writing
a Dr. Seuss poem?
Abraham Della Prime.
Abraham Della Prime.
Which I guess
is French for
the first Abraham.
Which he can't
possibly have been.
We've got Mrs. Butler.
I have to say,
I did not warm
to Mrs. Butler. No, she is, I did not warm to Mrs. Butler.
No, she is...
Maybe I'm reminded of a particular teaching assistant from my primary school.
Oh, really?
I think there may have been a Mrs. Butler in that vicinity.
I don't feel warmly towards her.
Did she consider you insolent and ungrateful?
I was certainly regarded as an insolent and disruptive child, yes.
What's that in the lunchbox? seven pairs you can't have seven pairs
alistair you can ask a question unless it's about pairs and slowly moves down back to the desk
yeah no i don't think anyone likes mrs butler the housekeeper jumped when she saw her she
haunted the house so much that they
sold it below market value and then she was the one that bought that house i mean that's basically
insider trading but would you if you could would you haunt your house in order to drive down the
possible idea for a channel 4 property show, manifestation, manifestation. That's very good.
So, yeah, come on, names.
Peddler of Swatham.
Swatham.
Just say it.
Say Swatham and try not to give me a five.
Okay, Swatham, it's a four.
Okay, then.
Supernatural.
I think it's 100%.
I don't think anything has happened that isn't supernatural.
You haven't given me anything even approaching history,
and I'm not convinced that whatever his name is archibald pine abraham della prime i'm not sure augustus
hair i think they might have dreamt all of these stories themselves yeah very mysterious impossible
to explain i think the only bit that is plausible is that no one around the butler's house liked them in ireland i also find it plausible
that a london shopkeeper was short with a tourist yeah yeah yeah it's five out of five for
supernatural yes perfect okay my next category it was just a dream and it was is in caps or bold
oh yeah and then but afterwards there's in a much smaller font
there's a little question mark in bracket okay all right and then after that and i've changed
the color of the font so it's white to match the background of the thing it says that's the point
actually mate isn't it and that's the name of the category yeah that's the name of the category in
full right okay it was just a dream brackets, question mark,
and then hidden sort of semi-visible text.
That's the point, actually, mate.
That's actually very much the point, mate.
Yeah.
One of them.
Something like that.
We'll sort it out.
That's a really bad category.
What?
That's some really poor work there.
Came to me.
Well, it's now basist or racist.
Can you explain what the category means?
What it is, is normally you complain about my stories.
Yeah.
Well, that was just a dream.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Because someone's lying in bed and then they, quote, wake up and see a ghost and then go straight back to sleep because it was a dream.
Yes.
I say that a lot.
But this, Alistair, what I've done here, Alistair, I've cleverly sidestepped it because it was just a dream.
The was is in capitals.
You pulled the rug out from under my feet.
Yeah.
You've ripped the counterpane off the bed.
Would sir like his petard?
Oh, no.
It's not going to hoist me, is it?
Yoink.
Yes, you're right.
That is what I always complain about.
And wow, you built it in.
It's five out of five.
Yes.
It was all a dream and that was the point
because they were dreams.
Very much the point, mate.
I thought that was a bad category,
but actually you've, you absolutely played me.
You played me like a Cockney shopkeeper
plays a Norfolk tourist.
I've played you like the demo button
on the Casio keyboard in the music room when I was at school.
A lot.
To the point that someone in authority had to complain.
All 10 of them in the room just running around pressing them all.
They're not going to be in sync.
Oh no.
It's horrible.
I spent so much time thinking of that last category.
I couldn't think of another category,'ve one has just been texted to me
it's a category of pears i'm sorry i've got big pear on the phone and they want to know if you're
going to give me less than five out of five for pears well i mean there were several pears in the
story you know um mrs butler and her counterpart there's the pair of people on the bridge having
a conversation yeah yes they had their dreams were in a pair he stayed there for the pair of people on the bridge having a conversation yeah yes they had
their dreams were in a pair he stayed there for a pair of days and there's you and me two white
guys with a podcast what my pair of accents that i can do yeah and of course uh at the end of it
all there is um the delicious pear itself the mealy mealy wet the sweet it sort of feels like
it's already been bruised.
It's the consistency of a bruised apple.
I don't know where you're getting your pears.
It doesn't sound like you've had good pear.
It's five.
You know what, Alistair?
Looking back on it with hindsight,
I think I was just sold a squashed apple.
James, I've got a little apology after that.
Swatham doesn't have a train station.
Oh.
You have to get a bus to Peterborough and then you come in to King's Cross St Pancras.
So everything I said in this episode
about travelling to London was wrong.
Thank you for
attempting to take the bullet for me, but I think what people are going to be walking away from this
podcast thinking is, let's get some pears. If you want to help us get James out of that well,
you can get on the Patreon if you think we've earned it. There is a real fun bonus episode,
which you will get access to if you join the Patreon. At patreon.com forward slash lawmenpod.
Alistair, can you drop a record scratch in here?
James, is there no end to your audio vandalism in this episode?
What has happened?
I've got breaking folklore news.
Or record scratch.
That's how they do it on the real news, isn't it?
Is someone handing you a sheet of paper from off screen yeah yes remember the maple durham treasure
yeah yeah of course you remember i said i could only find this in one source a book by ruth l
tongue so i did some extra research i messaged on twitter mark from the folklore podcast and he
spoke to a colleague who's more familiar with romany law, and there is no mention of this story outside of this one book.
Ooh.
Now, have you got the internet where you are right now, Alistair?
Yes. Yes, I do.
Get up Ruth L. Tung's Wikipedia page.
Okay. Ruth Lindle Tung.
Does anything catch your eye there?
It's got a controversy section.
It has. I'm seeing the words
problematic figure yes i was lost to a house fire yeah all a lot of people nowadays think that she
made up a lot of her stories oh more like ruth l forked tongue more like ruth lying
with her tongue that's not as good it's not as good. That's not as good.
She didn't cite her sources,
and a lot of her stories only appear in things that she's written
and are very much in her style.
Her defence was that a lot of her original documents
were lost in the house fire.
However, this particular story,
it's cleverly got its own alibi built in.
It's considered bad luck to talk about it.
That's explaining why you're not going to find it anywhere else.
Ah, yeah.
And you know what happened, Alistair?
What happened?
We talked about it.
And what happened to the sound quality?
Ah, yes, the curse.
Yeah, I think the biggest trick Ruth L. Tongue ever pulled
was convincing the world
that that treasure didn't exist
but then also wrote about it in a book
for some reason
some of that should have been in a smaller font
kind of invisible font yeah
yeah invisible font yeah