Loremen Podcast - S3: Leicester Comedy Festival Announcement Minisode
Episode Date: February 18, 2021Just a wee one to let you know we are appearing *online* as part of Leicester Comedy Festival on Saturday 20th Feb *2021*. James throws in a few bonus nuggets of folklore, featuring: pigs, beans, sock...s, Americans and Leicesterians. £5 tix are here... https://comedy-festival.co.uk/event/loremen-live-online/
Transcript
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Alistair
James
I'm sorry to interrupt
But whenever you say Alistair and I say James
I really want you to say Team Rocket
And it never happens
Okay
Alistair
James
Team Rocket
Thank you
Had to do it this time
We've got the blooming Leicester Comedy Festival this weekend.
I know.
Are you excited?
I am a bit, actually.
I found a really fun story about Leicester,
and I've also found some other fun stories about Leicester.
So since the live show is coming up this Saturday,
and this is just a mini episode trailer for it,
I mean, correct me if I'm wrong,
it seems like the perfect opportunity for you to share
some of those mini stories with the listenership.
Yes, this is like a little sort of amuse-boosh.
Boosh?
Amuse-boosh?
Yes.
Amuse-douche?
That's very much the premise of this podcast.
I'm the douche and I am amused.
I am amused.
I found this in Westbourne and Simpson, Law of the Land, the absolute classic lawmen text.
The classic folklore handbook, if your hands are flipping massive.
Yeah, you've got tendon power in your wrists.
Better be the size of an Irish giant if you want to call that a handbook.
According to St James Magazine, in 1762,
the mayor of Leicester was chosen by a pig.
The classic one pig, one vote.
And what they would do...
Or first pass the pigs?
I don't know.
It doesn't really work.
Pass the pigs.
I was thinking like first pass the post combined with pass the pigs.
It doesn't really work.
No.
What happened apparently is that all the candidates sat down with a plate of beans on their lap and whoever the pig went and ate the beans of first got to be the mayor.
Who agreed to this?
Who staged it?
Big Bean.
Probably Big Bean.
Broad Bean.
And it made me laugh a lot because it reminded me of
when I was being bullied in the workplace.
You remember all the nicknames. Oh, yeah, yeah. They said, and I bought into this because it reminded me of when i was being bullied in the workplace um you remember
all the nicknames oh yeah yeah they said and i bought into this because it was quite funny but
they would they said that the town i grew up in chipping norton that the mayor was a clever pig
in fact the cleverest pig and that's how come it got to be mayor when we know in reality
it's not even that smart it It's a very stupid pig.
Pretty much average.
And it would roll a green apple to say yes and a red apple to say no.
And that's how it would sort of do its mayoral edicts.
This bullying is quite elaborate.
It is.
It's got a backstory.
It passed the time, to be honest.
It passed the time.
And so I had a little look online at non-human uh elected officials
well no i say i didn't google that that's what the wikipedia page ended up being called i googled
pig mayor and it first came up with giggles the pig who ran for mayor in flint michigan oh yeah
didn't get in probably explains flint's current woes but in texas in a town called didn't ask that lady on
the internet how to pronounce it but it's lajitas it's like fajitas but with an l at the start so
i would say lajitas but my dad would say lajitas i'm gonna go with lajitas in texas they voted a
goat in to be the mayor by a landslide according to the quote which a goat
would probably be good at dealing with because they're usually mountain based excellent balance
yeah and it's been goats ever since people don't like change if it ain't goat don't fix it yeah
and another goat was voted mayor in Vermont in March 2019 AD ACE now i'm talking like a couple of years ago this is not like medieval
times yeah yeah a goat was voted in as to be mayor of vermont and it was a close it was such a close
call it only won by two votes over a dog called sammy oh what a blow for that dog yeah that was
the closest it had ever come.
And now it knows it's going to be goats.
It's going to be all goats.
The goats are going to get other goats in. Once goats get in, yeah, once they've got their little hoofs under the desk,
can't get them out.
Nope.
And it's not just America and Leicester where these stupid things happen.
No, because I was ready to believe it was.
In 2001, in Marseille, in France,
a dachshund called Saucisse, French for sausage,
was a candidate in Marseille.
It got 4% of the votes, didn't get in.
And eight years later, was a contestant on French Big Brother.
That's a fairly good lifespan for a dachshund.
Yeah.
But it did make it onto Big Brother.
Yeah, the dog was on Big Brother.
I don't know if it disgraced itself and then ruined all its political chances afterwards,
like George Galloway.
And the best one, and this is objectively the best one,
in 1967 in Ecuador, the mayoral candidate who was voted in was a foot powder.
Like talc? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.. Like talc?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And the talc won? Yeah, the talc won by
clear majority.
Yeah. Wow. Yeah.
My favourite one, it's not even the candidate,
it's just the way it's described, which
is Ed the Sock,
comma, a sock puppet.
I'd love that, but
we need to be told that Ed the Sock is a sock puppet. This isn't a proper episode, need to be told that the sock is a sock puppet.
This isn't a proper episode,
so we're not going to do
proper voting and names and stuff,
but I would definitely win
with the boar hog
that was nominated
as a candidate
in the 1968 US presidential election
called Pegasus the Immortal.
That's great.
So we're not going to talk
about that on Saturday.
No. If people are coming to the show thinking, well I hope
they talk about that time that the Leicester Mayor was
voted in by a pig. Not going to happen.
But I want you to know, we know.
We know. And that's going to be in my
head for the whole gig.
So if you'd like to learn about things that aren't
that pig, but do pertain to Leicester,
come along to Lawmen Live.
It's a virtual thing, you don't have to go anywhere.
You can do it from the comfort of your own internet.
So that's Saturday 20th of February
2021.
Doors open at 4.10pm.
Google Lawmen Live.
You know how to spell it. And Leicester Comedy Festival.
And pay five quid.
Quick! It's Thursday already.
Bit nervous. Bit nervous. And I really
need to stop thinking about pigs.