Love Life with Matthew Hussey - 280: "Why ‘New Year, New Me’ Is a Lie – The Truth About Change"

Episode Date: January 22, 2025

In this episode, Matthew dives deep into why the "New Year, New Me" mindset often sets us up for failure and how true change is possible with practical steps to break through our old habits and wiring. Topics include: Why Resolutions Fail: How old patterns and beliefs hold us back, no matter how ambitious our goals are. Why creating new goals without addressing underlying habits leads to frustration. The role of action and getting new reference points to rewire our beliefs. Breaking generational patterns of beliefs, behaviors, and trauma. Deciding to "be the pioneer" who changes the trajectory of your family or personal life. Recognizing the opportunities missed due to self-protective behaviors. Why fear of rejection and always "playing defense" hold us back. Practical tools for managing emotional triggers and replacing them with healthier responses.  ►► Join The "Matthew Hussey Weekend Retreat" In Miami, October 18-19. Grab Your Early Bird Ticket Before Prices Go Up! → https://matthewhussey.com/weekend-retreat-25-eb/ ►►Ask Matthew AI Your Biggest Dating Question for Free Now at. . . → http://www.AskMH.com ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com

What's up everybody? Welcome back to the Love Life podcast. Before we get into the episode today, are you someone who is seeing someone and struggling to get to the level of commitment you want with them? Maybe you don't know how to have the conversation. Maybe you've already brought it up and it didn't go well or they just never bring it up. Well I have something for you today. My biggest ever live event that I did called Casual Too Committed which talks all about this subject is available again. You can attend this masterclass for free right now. You don't have to wait just go to GetCommitment.com you can join the next session and watch it right now. In this session I talk about the biggest reason people struggle to get to commitment and

how you can avoid it. I talk about something called the progression bias and how you can use it to be taken seriously in dating without coming on too strong. I talk about the quick and easy way to see if someone's willing to commit or if they're just wasting your time, the secret to breaking out of dating limbo and creating true momentum in your relationship and the no games approach to any commitment conversation without the risk of driving someone away. Go check it out it's a really powerful program it's free and you can watch it now it's at GetCommitment.com. I think you're really gonna to enjoy today's episode

of the Love Life podcast. If you're someone who has been struggling to change, if you've been beating yourself up going, God, I'm just never going to get over this or I'm never going to be able to change this about myself. I'm never going to be able to stop having these emotions that plague my life. If you've been making resolutions this year, but it feels like it's all in vain because you're stuck in this brain and this body Doing the same things all over again. I want you to watch this I promise you this episode is gonna leave you way better than it found you First time going live, we're going live everywhere, YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, those are going to be popping up shortly.

If you're here on YouTube, seeing this first, hello. If you're watching the recording of this later in the future, then hello to you too. Welcome to, well, it's a bit late, I suppose, 16th of January to say welcome to 2025, but I, for the first week or so, week and a half of the year, me and Audrey and my wife, we took our moms to Hawaii for a vacation because it was a kind of dream of theirs

to go to Hawaii. So we wanted to fulfill that dream and create a memory. And you know, we don't have all the time in the world, do we, with the people we love? And you know, we wanted to make a memory and you know, life is make a memory and you know life is short so we were like let's do it what we waiting for let's make it happen so we booked it when you book things like that this rarely ever

convenient is it usually it's inconvenient to do something like that but we did it and it was amazing and we're so so happy that we did it. But we are now back in LA after that trip and we came back to a very strange and and sad and and you know devastating set of circumstances in LA with the wildfires. And through all of that we went, you know what, New Year's, we're deciding New Year hasn't started yet. New Year starts on Monday, whatever it was this Monday. We were like, it starts this week. So I'm, I don't know about you, I'm considering this the first week of the year, even though it's the third week of the year, technically, or the second, third week of the year.

But I'm excited to be with you all for a little bit today. You know, if you've got time to just sit with me for a few minutes now, for the next 30 minutes or so, then sit with me for a few minutes now for the next 30 minutes or so then sit with me and let's just have a chat and see if we can 30 or 40 minutes from now finish in a better place than however we're coming to this right now I hope you're in a good place already but if there's some part of you that is feeling in any way anxious right now or stressed or you're putting an enormous amount of pressure on yourself right now or you're feeling like things just aren't working out or maybe you're

feeling like the you know in some way you've already let yourself down on certain promises you made to yourself at the beginning of the year, resolutions that you you made, maybe you're finding that the same old patterns are reasserting themselves and it's rather depressing that that's the case because you are wanting it to be a new year and a new you and it just feels like It somehow isn't landing in the way that you'd hoped Then let's enjoy being together and see if we can make some progress here Before I get started. I want to just say hello to some people

Hello to you Mark, I really appreciate you being here. You're the next level of just relationship advice, the GOAT. I mean, I'm always, there's a big compliment, Mark. I really appreciate it. Jay, I always feel better after watching your videos. Thank you, Jay. Hi, Monica on YouTube. Who's here from Instagram right now? Looks like we've got Eugenia on Instagram. We've got Bernadette, hello to you.

Lucy, hello to you in London. Luke, what's going on in Italy? Good to see you here. Riffin on TikTok says, is this AI or is this really him? Is this the world we're living in now? Where we can't even, I can't like imagine, when AI gets to the point where it can go live

across platforms and be mentioning your names, which probably is already happening somewhere to be fair. That's gonna be scary. I mean, I do have an AI, so I am part of the problem, I suppose, but my, I'm very clear about when what I'm giving you is me as AI, I never pretend that it's me when it's actually AI, I'm always very clear. This is Matthew AI. This is the real me.

Um, Natalie, what's going on? Uh, good to see you on tick tock. Um, so look, I want to, I have a message today that I think is really important for all of us. There's a lot of rhetoric at the beginning of a year that is around this idea of new year, new you. That's what so many things are sold to us as, new year, new you, you know. That's what so many things are sold to us as. New year, new you.

And the message is positive, but it's a message that sets us up for an immediate fall. Because the reality is that there really is no such thing as new year, new you. We go into a new year and we make all these new plans about what we want to happen. But the reality is our old wiring, the wiring we had last year

and have probably had for the last 20 years or 30 years or 40 years or 50 years, comes with us into the new year. So while we might take our journal out and scribble down, you know, our top 10 goals for the year and things we want to make happen, our wiring is dictating what we do, how we behave, how we respond to things, what emotions we feel, far more than what goals we make for the year. Which is why we can have this awful feeling of no matter what I do, nothing ever changes. I never seem to feel better.

I never seem to feel less anxious. I never seem to feel better. I never seem to feel less anxious. I never seem to be happy. I never seem to find the right people in love. I never seem to lose weight even though I constantly set that goal to lose weight. I never seem to get the body that I keep telling myself I'm going to, you know, over the next three months I'm going to work hard and get the best body I've ever had. We, we have this awful feeling of nothing ever changes. I can't seem to do something different or to be a different way than I've been my whole life.

And that makes us scared. It makes us frustrated. It can make us angry and it can make us incredibly defeated and hopeless. Nothing works. If you relate to this, just say yes in the comments right now, or if you're on Instagram or Facebook, say retreat, because I'm gonna send you a link to something in a bit.

In fact, for anyone who hasn't, I'm gonna say this quickly now, but for anyone who hasn't, I'm going to say this quickly now, but for anyone who hasn't got their ticket yet to my event, that's happening in October this year is a two day event. There's early bird tickets available now. Go to MHRetreat.com. I'm not going to talk about it right now, but go there and grab your ticket. Um, because it's going to be a really special event and it's going to be live

and it's going to be in Miami. I'm going to be with you all. So, um, make sure you grab a ticket while the early bird tickets are available. Um, but, but if you relate to this, I see you Luke. Yes. Yes. Yes. Um, I, uh, Rebecca on Tik TOK.

Yes. Alec. Yes. So this is an extremely common feeling. I've had it many times in my life, like, God, this thing's never gonna change for me. The first thing we have to recognize is that change is hard. Everyone in our lives finds change hard, not just us.

Everyone finds change hard. That's why we have family members that we're constantly frustrated by, or we wish would behave differently. I mean, we just came out of the holidays season and the holiday season is one of the most infuriating and upsetting times for a lot of people because they go and they, you know, get back together and huddle together with family and they're reminded of all of the ways that their family has not changed. All of the ways that their family is still doing those things that drive them crazy or

that make them upset or in some cases just keep perpetuating this trauma that they originally created that we still carry with us. There's all these ways that we see the people around us not changing and that is because changing is incredibly difficult and in any system and let's say for now we're talking about a family system of mothers and fathers and stepfathers and mothers and brothers and sisters and children and cousins in any system very few people proactively change in ways that continue to make their life better. Life is going to change us in ways no matter what but positive change is not automatic and the

reason it's not automatic is because it's really really hard to change but change is possible it's possible to be something different it's possible to have different emotions than the ones we're having it's possible to live a different life than the one we've been. It's possible to live a different life than the one we've been living. It's possible to feel a different way than we have been feeling. Even if it feels hopeless, I promise you,

it is possible to change. But in order to change, we have to decide to be, and I want you to write this down, we have to decide to be the pioneer of our system, of our family, of our lineage. Because in most families, trauma gets passed down generation after generation, bad beliefs get passed down generation after generation,

ways of being get passed down. Now, if you had a mother and a father that taught you to stress out all the time and your body becomes wired to be stressed, then you could go through your whole life getting activated really quickly and finding that things constantly stress you out. Who relates to that pattern?

Who knows, like, oh my God, that's me. I'm like, I'm so hypervigilant. I get stressed really easily. Things really affect me and I feel like the moment something goes wrong, I, you know, I get anxious or I get afraid or I start getting overwhelmed. That's because we had people in our lives who modeled that kind of wiring for us or who put us in that kind of wiring consistently, even if they weren't. And that's how we got wired up. That's what we learned. And now what happens is we go, why is it I'm anxious all the time?

Why is it I'm stressed all the time? Why is it so hard to change? It's so hard to change because that was learned at a very early age. And by the way, your parents, the people before you, your caregivers, your role models, they had things passed down to them. And it requires someone to carry the torch where it's never been for the system to change, for your lineage to go a different direction.

It requires somebody and anybody can be the pioneer. This is what's interesting. This is what's exciting to me. Anybody can be the pioneer. But we have to decide I'm going to be the pioneer. And one of the things that's helpful, if you're in a lot of pain right now, if you're struggling right now, if you're in a lot of pain right now, if you're struggling right now, if you're feeling like you're so done being a certain way, that's powerful.

That's not a problem. That's power. When you feel like enough is enough, I can't do this anymore. I'm sick of stressing all the time in this way. I'm sick of being this anxious. I'm sick of constantly berating myself. I'm sick of feeling guilty or I'm sick of constantly pleasing people. If you get to the point where you've had enough, that's a really powerful place to be at the beginning of the year because necessity, you know, you ever heard that phrase, necessity is the mother of invention, right?

Well, necessity is the mother of our reinvention. When something becomes necessary, when a change becomes necessary, that's when we do something about it. That's when we decide, you know what? I'm gonna become a pioneer because I have to. There's no other choice. I can't live like this for the rest of my life.

I am done being this way. How many people here right now watching this are holding themselves, if you're if you're honest with yourself, are you holding yourself back in your love life because you're afraid of rejection or because you are afraid of getting hurt or because you're just afraid to be in the game because maybe you got hurt or someone broke your trust in the past or maybe you don't feel good enough, maybe you don't feel attractive enough. Write a comment now if you're holding yourself back right now in your love life,

but maybe you're sick of it, because you go, you know what? I'm gonna run out the clock on my entire life if I keep doing this. If I do this for another 10, 20, 30, 40 years, that's it, my life is gone. And what do I want on my tombstone? Am I going to be proud of my tombstone if they write, you know, here lies Mary. She never got rejected again. That's not exciting. That's not a story that we want told about us. Got hurt once,

but never got rejected again. That's not an interesting story, right? We wanna be the people that go out there and live it up and have a story and create memories and squeeze every drop out of this life. So you could get to a point where you say enough is enough. I don't wanna run out the rest of my days, the clock of my life on being afraid all the time. I can't do this.

I'm not gonna do this. So necessity is important. So let's just backtrack for a moment. As we go into a new year, the reason why so many of our goals don't work, our plans get disrupted, our resolutions don't happen, is because this new year, new me thing is a lie. It's not new year, new us, it's new year, old us.

New year, same old wiring. And no matter what goals we create, if we don't create new wiring to go with them, we're just gonna replay the same story we've been playing out our whole lives. So we have't create new wiring to go with them, we're just going to replay the same story we've been playing out our whole lives. So we have to change the wiring. Now changing the wiring isn't easy, which is why most people we love who frustrate the hell out of us don't change, is because change is hard. But change is possible for anybody. It requires us to be, to decide I am going to be the pioneer of my life. I'm going to be the pioneer of my family.

Maybe my mom or my dad or my brother or my sister, maybe they're not willing to change. Maybe they don't have the resources to change. Maybe they don't have it in them. Maybe they don't have the constitution to change. I am going to. I am going to be the pioneer of my life. I am going to be the pioneer of my family.

I'm going to do something different. Right? And by the way, we spend our whole lives looking for closure from people who are never going to give us closure because they won't change or because they're never going to say that cathartic thing before they die that's going to make us feel like, oh my God, they did love me.

Or, oh my God, they do acknowledge the ways they hurt me. Or they do see me. There are many moments in our lives or many people who are never going to give us that catharsis. The ultimate peace, the ultimate closure is the change we make for ourselves to never be like that, to create a different life for ourselves, to get around people that aren't like that, to create a different experience for ourselves, to create a different world for ourselves. That's the ultimate closure.

That's the peace. The peace is the closure. The peace we create in our lives by being different, by not subjecting ourselves to that same treatment over and over, by not holding ourselves back, by not giving into that story someone put in our head that we're not worth it. So yes, change is hard, but it's possible for the pioneers.

And if you're watching this, and if you didn't switch this off, then my guess is you're someone who the idea of being the pioneer in your life is exciting to you. This resonates with you. I wanna be the pioneer in my life this year. And like I said, we become the pioneer because something becomes necessary.

All right, it's no longer a choice. We go, I can't live like this anymore. I'm not prepared to. I wanna make a change. I don't wanna spend the rest of my life being this way. All right, if I stay this stressed all the time, I'm never gonna enjoy anything no matter what I achieve. Or if I hold myself back in this way,

I'm never going to find love. Or if I stay hung up on this X from my past, then I'm going to miss out on all these amazing people that are actually still out there who will want me or who will treat me well. So we have to get the tools to change our wiring. We have to get the tools to change our wiring. We have to get the tools to change our wiring. And what's beautiful is as we start to take more action, action in a different

way, because one of the ways we change our wiring is to get curious about well what what else could be possible or how could I live differently than I've been living and could that give me a different result than I've been getting? That changes things. If you just say, even if you just have the, you don't have to have belief that something better is possible, you just have to have the belief that something different is possible and that's pretty easy when you think about it because you go, you know what what it can't be true that the way I live is the only way to live there must be other ways of living and other people are getting different results than me

and I'm not talking about other people who are more attractive than me so we could use that excuse yeah but they're getting that result because they're more attractive no there are people who look like us who are our age who are getting different results than we are and when when we acknowledge that, which we have to because it's true, we have to say why are they getting different results? They must be doing something different. And why is doing something different reserved for them? Answer is not. We can do something else as well. We can do something different. So when we decide, you don't even have to have belief. My friends, you don't have to believe

that you can be more, have more, do, like you don't have to believe any of that right now. I'm not talking about confidence yet. You just have to know that the way that, you just have to have the humility to know that the way that you just have to have the humility to know that the way that you live isn't the only way to live. I was someone who for a long time I struggled to trust. I struggled to trust. I had a lot of things happen in my life that meant that trusting people was very very hard for me. If you relate to that pattern, leave a comment now.

I had a lot of things happen in my life that made it really hard for me to trust. And I didn't realize that by the way in my 20s. If you'd have asked me in my 20s, do I trust people? I wouldn't have even been conscious of that pattern in me. I would have said, yeah, I trust people. People are great. I didn't realize how much I didn't trust people and how much my actions were constantly driven by not trusting people. So I would always be afraid, who here relates to this one, I was always afraid that I was going to give more than I was going to get. Not because I'm not a giving person because deep down my nature is I love giving but I was always afraid that if I gave I was going to get taken advantage of. So I was really careful in that way and I always was scared about like you know how close do I let

someone and and you know this person's going to take someone and, and, you know, this person's gonna take advantage of me. So then I would play defense instead of just like really being an amazing human being with this person. And here's the scary part about life. You don't, we, we, we often get caught up on the opportunities that we know we miss.

You know, when someone outwardly rejects us or leaves us or, you know, a business opportunity that we know about, passes us by after initially showing interest, we know about the opportunities we missed and those are the ones we tend to focus on. Let me tell you the much scarier part. The opportunities we don't even know we're missing are way, way, way more.

What I didn't realize for a long time in my life is how many opportunities I was missing that I didn't even realize I was missing by being this way, by not being able to trust, by being afraid of taking advantage of. And it cost me opportunities in every part of my life. And at the time in my 20s I was really focused on building and growing this company and doing what I was on the mission right because I was really focused on building and growing this company and doing what I was on the mission, right? Because I was insecure and I was trying to make myself feel better that way and I

Know looking back now because I have much more awareness of myself and my patterns and life. I Know looking back now how many opportunities I missed Or would have missed because I was that way. I know because of how many more opportunities come to me today than did then. And the fascinating part is the way I learned this was how do we change? We first, we get clear that changing is a necessity. We decide to be a pioneer. clear that changing is a necessity, we decide to be a pioneer. And then we start to look at, well, I need to do something different.

I don't know what that different thing is, but I need to do something different. And we start looking around and going, who could model different for me? Who's like me, who's getting results? I'm not. How can I get different modeled for me in a way that allows me to change? And I got around people who were getting results I wasn't. And it was enlightening because I realized when, you know, I would get to a point, for example,

I would get to a point in a business relationship or a friendship where I would feel like, well, I don't know if I want to do that for someone, because if I do that for someone, I could get taken advantage of. And I'd have friends in my life, new friends, who didn't think like that. And I'd realize where I went left, they went right. Where I said, I'm not going to offer that because I might get taken advantage of, or I might give too much.

They said, I'm gonna, I'm gonna be generous. I'm gonna show up. And if they take advantage of me, so be it. I'm, then I'll, I'll learn who that person is. And I won't go, I won't show up in that way again. But I'd rather show up in this way than not show up in this way and miss out on the most quality people in life by not being that way. And what happened for me is I missed out on a lot of quality people by not being that way, by not expressing myself fully, by not giving fully. So this is just one pattern. are so many right we just took our mums to Hawaii. I was saying this for those of you just joining I was saying

this to people we just took our mums on a dream tip trip to Hawaii because life is short and I was like we need to make moments with our mums that their dream is to go to Hawaii let's go and make a moment it's not convenient I've got tons on my plate so as Audrey it's not easy. I've got tons on my plate. So has Audrey. It's not easy to take a week and a half off at the beginning of the year when everything's starting to ramp up. But you know what?

This is important to us. We wanna make these moments. We'll never regret making these moments. And we took our moms and there was a, we were in Maui and there was a hike that we wanted to do. And the initial response from our mums to this hike was, Oh, I can't do that. And I remember specifically, you know, my mum was a little, my mum's,

my mum's a bit of a people pleaser. So she, my mum, even though she probably didn't want to do it, she started to come around because she was trying to please me. But Audrey's mum was like, you go, I'm not doing it. And I was like, I know you can do this. This isn't a question of can you do it? I know you can do this hike. And she kept telling us, I can't do it.

I'm not, I'm, I'm, I'm not in shape. I can't do it. I'm not like, it's not possible for me. I'm not going to do it. Like you go do it. I'm not like, it's not possible for me. I'm not gonna do it. Like you go do it, I'm not gonna do it. And here's the crazy part. I won't go into the long story of like what we, the way we spoke to her and what we said

to get her on that hike. But when we got back from that hike that she did, the next day we asked her, we said, what's been your favorite part of the trip so far? We had already been away for a week or so. So's been your favorite part of the trip so far? We had already been away for a week or so. So what's your favorite part of the trip so far? She said, the hike. She said, I loved it.

And she said, it has made me realize how many things I am still capable of doing. Now what it created was a new reference point. I want you to write that down. Reference point. It created a reference point. A reference point is what we hang a new belief on. And in 2025, all of us, me included, are a bad judge of the things that we can't do. We think we can't do a lot of things, but we have no concept of what's possible for us.

Because there are many things we can do, but we just don't have the reference points for them yet. What I want us to do is go out there and create the reference points. Just like Audrey's mum did on that hike in Maui, she created a new reference point. And that reference point has changed, that's already changed her this year to a point where she said, what else am I saying I can't do that I may be able to do? How

many things in my life am I telling myself I can't do? And I see Lulu on Instagram is saying lucky if you have the support. Let me tell you this for everyone out there who wants support in this, who is like I am at that point Matthew, I am I want to be the pioneer in my life. I don't want to accept where I am. Life is too short. I want to make memories. I want to get out there. I want to live it up. I want to see what's possible for me. I don't want to hold myself back. I'm ready to begin a new chapter. You can do that with me this year. And this is a special year unlike any

other year, because in October I am running a brand new live event. It's happening on the 18th and 19th. It's a retreat in Miami. It's at the New World Center, which I'm geeking out about because the architect that designed the Walt Disney Concert Hall in LA designed this building. So it's this ultra modern gorgeous building,

architecturally. It's gonna be, I think, my favorite venue I've ever performed in. But people are gonna fly in from all over the world and we're gonna make these changes together. We're gonna do this together, this work. I've created a framework that I've worked on for 17 years of my life now.

And I'm downloading it to you in the weekend that we have together. A framework that helps you heal from the past, a framework that helps you manage emotions differently so that when emotional triggers come up, which they will, you know how to replace them with new triggers that have you doing new things and taking new actions so that new actions become automatic. We're gonna be learning how to truly create core confidence on that weekend. I'm gonna be giving you a framework for making decisions

about the next chapter of your life if you're not sure which way to go. I'm gonna show you how to change your wiring for good. And it's gonna be an amazing time. So I know not every single person watching this right now can make it, don't worry, I'll carry on for a little longer. But I just wanna say to everyone out there who is capable of getting to that weekend, make that a date

in your diary this year. It's happening in October on the 18th and 19th. If you're on Instagram and Facebook, comment the word retreat and I'll send you a link. If you're on YouTube or TikTok, go to this link. I'm going to pop it up right here. It's uh,Retreat.com go to that link right there MHRetreat.com and the reason by the way to do this now and not to wait is because we have an allocation of early bird tickets we have different this is the first time I've ever done an event like this where there are tiers of tickets so we want a really affordable ticket for everyone who wants general admission for people who want a really affordable ticket for everyone who wants general admission, for people who want a VIP ticket with the works and the front of the stage and all of that. We have that kind of ticket as well.

But right now we have deep discounts on every single ticket as part of an early bird allocation to begin the year. That's not going to last. So if you know you want to come and join me, grab a ticket now. Make sure that you get it while the year. That's not going to last. So if you know you want to come and join me, grab a ticket now, make sure that you get it while the price. This is the most affordable it's going to be for the whole year. And the beautiful thing is it's a weekend. It's not my retreat until last year was a six day program

and a lot of people wanted to come, but they just couldn't get the time off work. They couldn't get their kids or their pets looked after. It just wasn't possible logistically. This is a two-day event. So we're gonna have many, many people coming that could never come before. Teachers, I'm looking at you,

because I know there are a lot of teachers out there who have always wanted to come to one of my live programs and have never been able to because it's always during term time. You can come now because it's just a weekend. And also men, men, you have never been able to come to one of my programs before in this way. This is an invitation to all of you to come and join us.

We are welcoming you. It doesn't matter what gender, doesn't matter what sexual orientation, we just want you there. We are so excited to spend time with you and I'm so excited to give you the things that I've been working on. It's not just gonna be the best of the best of all of the tools for change

that I've had from the past. It's also all of the new things that I'm learning that I'm going to be downloading to you that weekend. So like I said, MHRetreat.com is the link to grab a ticket. I really, really hope that you come and join us because I'm mega excited for this event. This is gonna be an amazing weekend. It's gonna be really immersive and it's a one-time event. I'm doing it once this year and that is it.

So make the time. And also there's something really, I always think there's something very powerful about putting something in your diary now instead of thinking about it, having it locked in and put, I have a big calendar on my wall for the whole year, Jesse Itzler's big ass calendar. And in that calendar, I put my event,

I put every event I'm gonna do. When you put this event in your calendar, you're sending a message to yourself, my growth is a priority, My change is a priority. And once you do that, once you lock that in, once you book those flights, there is something psychological that happens. You start taking the year seriously

on a whole different level. Not only that, but you start going, what changes do I wanna make before I even get there so that when I get there, I have new things to talk about than the things that I wanna talk about today in January. So, come, that's all I'll say, come. I'm so, so excited to be with you. This is a dream of mine to run an event like this

and we've been mega excited about it behind the scenes. I'm excited to finally be able to talk about it and announce it to all of you. I wanna just say hello to a couple of people. Kimmy says good luck I wish I could go on Instagram I wish you could come too Kimmy but I respect the fact that you can't I've just hope I wish that you could if anything changes let us know. Manisha says I might find a man on your retreat for the first time that might be true. Until now, you definitely wouldn't have found a man

on our retreat, because it was 100% women. But yeah, who knows? We've got a significant number of men who are coming because the men, you know, I have a lot of men who over the years have always wanted to come to an event like this of ours, and they've never been able to. So there's a big backlog of men

that are gonna be joining us this time. And let's see, and by the way, if you've been looking into the retreat in previous years and you're like, I just can't afford it, check out the prizes on this one. They are completely different. It's a completely different level and we've made it much more accessible.

Chrissy says, yay, this is so exciting. I am excited too, I'm glad you are. Katia, thank you for that comment on TikTok. Mad Meryl says, you are the reason why I have my husband. Thank you. That's amazing. That's so, so cool. Reluice Adventures, hello from Ireland, hello to you in Ireland, Sonja, hello to you in Europe. Uh, lovely. Janja says, well if you're looking for a good man, this event is the way to go. Let's hope so. I feel like the quality of men will be good.

I feel like I've always been really proud of the audience that we attract. You know, we attract people who are thoughtful. We attract people who don't want to be patronized with overly simplistic messages. You know, we attract people who value authenticity. We attract what we are and for me what's most important is that I'm always real with you. What's most important is that I never always real with you. What's most important is that I never make things sound easier than they are, that we're realistic about what we have to do in order to make change in our life. I never want to dumb things down. I always want to, you know, I love making videos for people that enjoy things that are

both entertaining and intellectual. So, you know, I've always been really proud of the people that come to our events because they're a reflection of all of those values. Very good. Well, everyone, it's been such a pleasure to be with you. I wanna do more of these, but I wanna welcome you to the new year officially because I haven't had a chance to do that yet.

For everyone who is, I know, going through a really difficult time in LA right now, I'm with you, I'm literally with you in LA right now. So I feel you, I've got many friends who have been affected by this, and some that have been affected in really terrible ways. And it's just extraordinary how many people have lost so, so much. So I, my heart's with you and I hope wherever you are in the world right now,

that you've had a start to the year that you'd hoped for. If you haven't, then I hope that together this year we can get you to a place where you feel back to yourself or better than back to your normal self. You feel like you're better than you've ever been and you know if you're someone who where it's already feels like the wind is at your back I'm excited to help you go to a whole other level this year. Not just in your love life but in every part of your life and for those of you that are coming to the retreat in October, the weekend retreat, don't expect this just to be something that helps your love life. This is going to be something that helps every part of your life. You know we're focusing on the three relationships. Your relationship with other people,

not just in love but with people in general. Your relationship with yourself and your relationship with life itself, especially when it's not going our way. If we master those three relationships, we're going to have an amazing life. So I am excited to see you all in person and of course to speak to you more this year. Thank you so much for joining. Don't forget if you're on Instagram or Facebook comment retreat right now and I will send you a link to get early bird tickets for the retreat. Pam, I see you just did that. Well done. That's great. Make sure it's swords life Just said, just commented retreat.

Make sure you do that. And if you're on YouTube or tick tock, that won't work. That only works for me to send you a message on Instagram and Facebook. But if you are on YouTube or tick tock, you can go here to MH retreat.com. Look for that link at the top of my screen right there. If you just type, go open another browser right now or another window in your browser and type in Mhretreat.com Learn all about the program and grab a ticket while the early bird special is on because that's gonna be closing soon. So

Go and grab a ticket while they're cheaper. Why not if you're gonna come this is the time to book your ticket So thank you so much. I'll see you soon. Be well and giving you love and wishing you peace and happiness wherever you are in the world today. Alright, thanks for tuning in and thank you so much for spending some time with me. I'll see you soon. Thank you so much for listening everybody. If you have any questions on the retreat, you can email us at podcast at matthewhussy.com and our team will get back to you and make sure you have everything you need to make your decision to come to that program, which

we really want you to come to. So I hope to see you there. Thanks again for listening and I'll speak to you in the next episode of Love Life.