Love Life with Matthew Hussey - Let’s All Do This One Thing Today

Episode Date: July 22, 2016

I have a challenge for you today… It’s something that you think about doing almost daily, yet you probably never make the time to do it. It’s something that would make another person in your life very happy, and yet would make you even happier. It won’t cost you a cent, and will only take a few moments out of your day. You’ll feel better afterwards than before you did it. Are you up for the challenge? Listen to today’s LOVE Life and let’s do it together…

Hello everyone, this is Love Life with Matthew Hussey. You know, we've all been hurt in relationships. If we're not careful, we can end up shutting ourselves off completely to protect ourselves from more pain. But that cheats us out of opportunities to find the love we really deserve. So what should we do instead? I want to come back to this at the end of the show. But first, let's get into today's episode. I have a very important subject today, and that subject is the people you love,

the people you care about. I feel and have felt lately that there are too many people in my life that I don't reach out to, to connect with. I had a friend contact me recently and he told me, you know, when are you, when he said, when are you back in London? And I, I was too quick in my email. I said, oh, I'm, you know, I'm not sure yet. I'm just trying to figure out the schedule. How are you doing? And he, he wrote me this kind of lengthy email about everything that was going on in his life and how great, you know, things were going. And he said, I really want to see you. He said, I'm doing this party in Ibiza soon. I'd love you to come join me and the guys. If not, at least love to catch up in London when you're back, if you can make time. And, uh, I still haven't gotten back to that email.

And it occurred to me this morning, he wrote it a few days ago. And this is one of my dear friends. This is actually someone that I spent a lot of time with. I was in China with this person. I used to live in Shanghai for a little while and I was living in an apartment in China with this person. And since then, we were so close then and we haven't touched base. And I felt bad about that. And I didn't just feel bad for his sake. I felt bad for mine. I heard a quote recently from Christopher Hitchens, the late Christopher Hitchens, where he said one of the great melancholies of aging is the realization that you can't make old friends. And it hit me profoundly when I heard that.

You can't make old friends. You can only make new friends. And there's beauty in that, of course, because there are always new people that can come into your life. But I want to take a moment to acknowledge the old, to acknowledge the people that were in our life and maybe are still around for us to connect with, family, friends, maybe people we

went to school with, maybe people we met at university, maybe people we met in our first job, but people that we just lost touch with because life gets in the way. Life moves quickly. I understand it. But I think it's important for us to connect with those people again. And I want to set you and me a challenge today. And the challenge is to pick up the phone to one person that you want to reconnect with, that you just want to find out how they are and what's going on in their day and what they're up to and where they are right now. Where are they living? What are they doing? How's their job? What's annoying them right now? What's frustrating them?

Don't make it one of those phony calls where you call them and, hey, I'm great. How are you? I'm great. Everything's great. No, but have the phone call where you really have a chat with them and get into it with them a little bit. Because I guarantee at the end of that, you're going to feel so much better. I never regret it when I do it. I pick up the phone, I talk to someone, and I feel connected again in life. There was an article that came out a few years ago, a very profound article, which talked about the top five regrets of the dying. And this was from a palliative nurse who would nurse people in their dying days. And she found that consistently there were five regrets that kept coming up for people. And one of these regrets was, I wish I'd stayed in touch with old friends. I wish I'd stayed

connected to people because of course, at the end of it all, who do you have? What do you have? Your relationships. And I always fear for myself that I spend so much time on this ambitious road of what I'm trying to create that I don't leave time for the things that are actually important. Because what do you, by the way, once you've created it all, what do you want? You want someone to share it with. You want friends. Once you've made your money, where do you want to go? You want to go on holiday with who? Your friends, your family, the people you care about. And if you didn't nurture those along the way, it's going to be hard to pick up the pieces at the end of it. So find someone who means something to you.

It could be someone close. It could be someone that was close a long time ago. But pick up the phone and connect. And feel how fulfilling it feels and how much meaning it gives your day just to have 10 minutes of connection that you wouldn't normally have. And how much less lonely and isolated it makes you feel. And by the way, the pleasant surprise you will have is how much that other person appreciates that you thought of them too. That's it. I'll see you soon. Bye guys. At the beginning of today's show i brought up the question how can we open ourselves up to love

again when we've been hurt in one of my live seminars i actually coached a woman through this in a q a session and i want to give you free access to it today i call this video the three female mindsets that drive men wild. And it's filled with empowering and practical advice that you can use today. To get your free access, just go to lovelifepodcast.com forward slash mindsets.