Love Life with Matthew Hussey - (Matt Monday): Doomed to Never Find Love? This Will Change Your Story...
Episode Date: September 18, 2023I’ve found that one of the biggest confidence-killers in dating happens when we dwell on the reasons why someone may not be attracted to us. Whether we’re sensitive about our looks, our age, or ev...en the fact that we have kids, the fear of rejection can sometimes stop us before we get started.  Angela’s story in this week’s episode is one of the most impactful I’ve heard on this subject. I’m so excited for you to see it. If you want to feel more confident in dating (and in life!) you can’t miss this one! --- ►► Transform Your Relationship With Life in 6 Magical Days. Learn More About The Matthew Hussey Retreat at. . . . → http://www.MHRetreat.com
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🎵 We all have our personal story about why we are going to struggle to find love, about why we have
struggled to find love, about why it's never going to happen for us in the future. And one of my
favorite things to do is to dissolve those stories so that we can finally go out there and get what we deserve in this area.
This is a story that I wanted to show you that can give you hope and a new belief in your love life.
I want you to think about the story you've been telling yourself about why you're not going to find love.
And see if by the end of this story, you don't feel a little bit
lighter with it. There was this one person on this program that called me up a couple of months back
because she had had some things happen in her life since that program. And when she made that call, I heard it and I went, you got to come back.
You got to come back and I need you to tell other people what you've done because wow.
And so she came back this time and I'm going to bring her up here
and we're just gonna spend five
minutes just talking about what she has done since because her story is a very
very interesting one and so relevant to all of us so Angie where are you oh
there she is okay give it up for Angela everybody how How you doing?
Now that's 10 years or 8 years now.
Wow! Was it that long ago?
Yeah. And I haven't aged a bit.
You haven't. You haven't.
So you came on that program and I remember, maybe a good place to to start is I know there was a big event in your life.
Let's fill people in on that because I feel like that gives us context for everything that we'll say after that.
So as you can see, or you might not be able to see, I wear a prosthetic. And my story is quickly that I was 23 and I was making my way home from work and life was great.
I was with friends, I had a job I loved and in the moment everything changed.
I sadly was hit by a drunk and drunk driver and when he hit me in a van at 70 miles per hour
I was injured for life and the injuries I have now happened at that moment
and the hardest thing was when my leg was taken from the impact of the vehicle.
The driver stood over me and he walked away. And this is what led me to Matthew. Because
being in hospital and getting told, you're injured, you're not going to walk again, you're not going to live
independently again, we don't know if you're going to be able to have eat yourself or dress yourself.
I defied that. I made sure when I left the hospital that I would walk again.
I walked in crutches but that was good enough But my self-worth was on the ground.
And there was nothing around me.
And there was nothing there that showed me how to put that together.
So I went onto YouTube.
And it was one of Matthew's earlier videos.
I mean that in a nice way of course.
He was in a park, what park was it in London?
It was in Berkeley Square.
Yeah, and...
I remember the video.
I was sat on a, nowadays we have Jameson and everything, I was sat on a bench just filming
myself.
And I do this, it wasn't on an iPhone it
was on like an old Sony cam like yeah and it was about core confidence and I knew what I read what
confidence was you know you read in the magazines or your friends tell you be more confident but I
knew my confidence was on the ground more than most because
the thought that was left with me was like how am I worthy if somebody could
walk away and leave me so I clicked on the video I watched it I wrote every
word down what confidence is what the levels are like I've done the same as
you guys and I still do the same thing. I watch the videos. I learn everything from it
and one of the biggest things that ladies have taught me is we share the
same thing. You just, we just get it what you're saying you know. So when I went on
his website, you were doing an event down in London and it was about
confidence wasn't it? And then I went to speak to Matthew and again he was bouncing from one side to the other.
And it was like, this is amazing.
And the ladies who I met there are the ladies who went to the retreat in Florida.
And we're still friends to this day.
And we're not friends because of what Matthew's connected us to.
Because the journey that we've experienced and we're still
experienced and I'm still tapping into Matthew's work today because I still want to go to that
next level in that next level so then when you I so that kind of brings us to the retreat because
I remember a very specific moment on the retreat that you you reminded me of this home in Florida there was like a mini
like kind of movie room and Angela pulled me to one side and said hey you know you know let's
have a chat we went into the movie room we sat down one-on-one and she and you can tell me if I'm paraphrasing correctly but you had mentioned to me that
when you were on a date what the the monologue that was constantly going through your mind
is he's not gonna want me because I'm missing a limb yeah pretty much yeah Pretty much, yeah. What happened next?
Before he got to that point, we sat in silence.
And he said, I'm going to sit here until you tell me what it is.
And I sat there.
And then I crossed my arms in defiance I was like I'm not saying and then I couldn't say because I
felt so sad about that I couldn't say because it's a guy sitting in front of me like can I say this
the one thing that's on my mind and he just sat defiantly and he's like, we're going to sit here all day. I was like, that pain?
Scottish stubbornness was coming out quite badly.
And in my head I was thinking, he has to see other ladies.
So the more you sit there, you're stopping him going to talk to the other ladies
and allow them to have their moment to talk about things.
But I just sat, I just couldn't say it and then he said
there's nothing I haven't heard before just that you've said this week and I said it I think I
blurted it out and he just said in what just those simple words like in what In all the things that I'd been carrying with myself.
Like, it was like, oh, you've been carrying this?
You built it up to this big picture?
And it was like, in what?
I remember saying to you, I remember looking at you and saying,
how arrogant are you?
Do you remember that?
Yeah.
I burst out laughing, like, yeah.. I never thought about that. I said how arrogant are you? And she went like this. And then after like 30
seconds just died laughing. Do you remember? Like just in fits of laughter.
Yeah. and I remember
specifically Angela saying she started laughing and laughing and laughing and I
said as she was laughing I said what you need everyone to want you like everyone
you go on a date with has to fall in love with you and choose you no one can
reject you who are you no one's allowed to say I don't want you how
arrogant is that and she started laughing and laughing and laughing and
she says I know that is arrogant and she's like and and it was this this
moment that I remembered that moment because of the phone call that you gave me because you then called me this
was what you said 10 years ago something like that yeah you called me a few months ago and
tell everyone what you told me by the way I also remember a moment where I also remember a moment
where Angela was we were in the kitchen remember, and you fell over in the kitchen and I was, go on.
So it's taken me a while, so just to give you a heads up here and with all you guys,
this is pretty much the first time that I'm wearing a skirt with my legs out. Thank you.
Thanks, guys.
Please.
The Scottishness now.
But it was my mum at the back.
And some of you might know my special story with my mum.
She's always gave me the confidence to get out there and share it.
And here I am.
So I'm digressing.
So when I went to Florida, it was all about the long dresses.
Something cardigan to hide my arm.
And I thought it was like a fashion statement I was going with.
But looking back, I was actually covering up, covering the insecurities, covering everything I could possibly do.
And that morning, we were down to the kitchen and I'm trying to catch up with everybody else.
And I remember Steve's in the kitchen I remember mum's in the corner at top of
the table making sure everybody's okay and Matthew came down and I just went
I fell and my skirt went up and I was like oh no hopefully my pants don't show but I was more bored about my
legs showing I was more bored about that insecurity that thing that thing like in Chris um you were
talking about this week see that thing that's holding you back that thing that you don't want
to talk about that thing that that's there like see since you start talking about it oh my god your life will go like this
it's took me like come on went to treat 10 years I took on this stuff then I kind of debated about
I'll take this little bit but maybe not that little bit and I'll take this little bit maybe
not that little bit some of it works some of it't. And as time was going on I was like, yeah this is taking a bit longer than everybody else. And
then I thought, let's just do all of it. And all of it, again, my life opened up. And the
story was the phone call that I shared with you.
So tell me, tell everyone what you told me because this was one of the greatest phone
calls I've had in these last two years.
Can I just say something about your mum before I go on?
Yeah.
So when I fell, my head did make a kind of a scene.
And the one person that came over to me was his mum.
And she picked me up and she could see that
I spelt something on my dress and I can't do an accent so I won't and she says you go upstairs
get dressed come back down and I'll wash your dress she washed my dress by hand and she hung it up
and just by doing that little thing like feeling embarrassed
and feeling like
so awkward
just by that beautiful action
that she'd done and it's not a big deal
touched me
and it still has touched me to this day
like as Matthew says
that's the way his mum is
and the next day I wore the dress again
because of his mum is like and the next day I wore the dress again because of his mum so thank you
I'm digressing sorry I think I take after you
so the thing was leading up to this information I was going to share with Matthew was how do I get the guy
who goes all around the world how do you reach out to the guy who's everywhere so I thought right
I'll send this email but I don't know if you'll get it I don't know if it'll even reach him you
know like and get the guy techniques the techniques that he shares with you today.
Now, if this is me, if that was there 10 years ago and this is here now,
your life is going to be even more better than mine.
Was I met a guy?
And the second date, the first date was good.
You met for a couple of hours, caught up.
And the second date, as Matthew said, just put it on the table,
just tell him what it is, like get it over and done with
and I did
and I was so worried when I was going to tell this guy what my accident was and what scars I've got and what I wear
that he turned around and he said the same thing as Matthew
and what? you in what and I knew I knew then that this is the man for me and within yeah like just and it's
was it because what Matthew said that that this man had said this?
Probably.
But also, what Matthew had taught me about myself,
when I was sharing this with him, I remember before meeting up with him,
if he doesn't like me for who I am, then stuff it.
I'll just keep going. I'll keep going.
My worth doesn't define what his is so the get the guy stuff
that works
and with all
if I'm standing here and you can see
what I wear, my scars
the insecurities
any insecurities you've had, I've had it
seen it, done it, got the picture
if I can get that
you can certainly get that and then a few
months later we went to St Andrews which is a beautiful place in Scotland so we went on holiday
and he booked the honeymoon suite and I was like wow like nobody's ever done that for me
and I was like this is amazing he said oh it just so happened the hotel that was the only room they had. I was like wow, amazing, my mum knows. And then we go out for something to eat and then he's really nervous,
like at one point he was shaking and at one point he's like, he literally said you want to try this
and when he said to try the food it went and hit someone. It was like that bad and I was thinking I was thinking I've still got it
and then he's like that I need to take you to St Andrews it's a beautiful place up there
beautiful scenery and I was like yeah let's do that under the stars beautiful and then he's like
close your eyes I've got a surprise for you.
And I was like, okay.
And then I'm closing my eyes
and this is five minutes later and I'm thinking,
I'm gonna get murdered.
I'm gonna get murdered.
It's like, I'm thinking the worst.
And then he's like, close your eyes.
And I was like, okay.
And then walking with heels on sand
with a prosthetic leg is really difficult.
So I'm going down to the sand and I'm like trying to walk sexy but slipping.
It was like, but he thought it was cute.
It wasn't really.
And then I just was like, wow, this is so beautiful.
And look at everything you can see.
And then, what are you doing down there?
And he proposed. And six months later, we were married.
Because of you.
I've got two more things to share.
Just, I don't want to take your time up.
No, take my time up.
You can run the day today
I think my nerves
are kind of disappeared now because I'm super
excited now that I'm sharing this with you girls
because see all week I've wanted to tell you
things I've wanted to come
and sit with you but I've had to kind of stay
a wee bit
what's the word closed you know
like in case I slipped up
and I shared this you know because I in case I slipped up and I'd shared this, you know,
because I'm a bit of a gab. So another thing that I shared with Matthew was
my story, the thing that I couldn't speak about, the thing that caused me most torment, the most
thing that I was scared about. Again, this thing about the thing that's holding you back
is now for me, now I've spoke about it you back is now for me now I've spoke
about it Matthew got it out me I've now started my own charity and I now help families and children
who have been hurt by drunk and drug drivers so yeah but I wouldn't have been able to do that if
I hadn't experienced the retreat I wouldn't have do that if I hadn't experienced the retreat I wouldn't have
experienced that if I hadn't had the beautiful elephant hair presentation I wouldn't have had
to been able to do that if his mum's love and affection like the way that she is with people
like I am like that now when I go and visit families you know just with a touch or I'm not washing clothes but
and my beautiful mum in the corner as well like her kindness and compassion and beauty
and always been there for me you know I feel very lucky but it's took all this time to get here
so I need to give this to you because I need to show you something so one of the saddest things
so one of the saddest things about being um in the accident and watching this for you guys is like
getting told that this is not going to happen for you like you're not going to have your life
you're not going to it's like Matthew was talking about the the moment when you look back at your
life you don't have the people around you and you don't have the people around you
or you don't have the things that you want.
And I was told, because of the severity of my injuries,
that I'm never going to have a child.
I imagine that, like, you've always wanted to have a family
and have a child and to have that taken away from you
and to think, like like how do you console yourself
with that like I don't think I could and lucky I've got the love of my lovely husband now and
things like that but Matthew wanted me to come out and talk when was it Christmas time and sadly
I had to go back into hospital for another operation and my operation it wasn't good
ladies it was really hard in fact it was life-changing
mummy can you come and see this Pauline Pauline Stephen can you come and see this Pauline? Pauline Stephen can you come and see this?
I'm going to show you guys just in a minute but I just want you to see this reaction because
their love and care for the retreat has brought, I'll let you share that with mum and dad. I know, like, oh, so lovely.
I know.
So, I know.
So, yeah, so I've got a wee baby girl now.
Thank you.
I'm so pleased for you I really hope nobody told you
in the spoil the surprise
how could you not tell me that on the phone
it was really hard
I did have work
I did say to him I had work on
and I did have work but it was still that way like would it be safe to travel and things like that
and um but most importantly like... What's her name? Hannah. Hannah. And she's so cute.
It's like sometimes I look at her and I just think wow like I carried you like amazing and
I think what I want to share with you and I hope this you can all hear this like if you think like
coming to the retreat or get the guy thing and you're thinking oh it's not knitting not getting
it I don't have my goals I don't have this, or you might be thinking, oh, this
is what I want to do, it's funny how things just change, but they've changed because you've
had this experience, and I'm not any different for you, my scars are different, my life experience
is a bit different, but I'm just like you, I'm just like one of the girls but I know and I've came from
Scotland two flights away I dragged my mum here she's now burnt
sorry sorry it's a lovely suntan
I've came this way because I want to tell you that this works I was trying to think of a
beautiful quote or something like that but
that's what I said to you on the phone. This works. There's no like sugar coating it, there's no putting
it a pretty bow or if this is wanting your life to be better and sometimes I started out thinking
I wanted to go in this direction, and it's took me to this direction.
But I have fulfilment in my life, in all areas.
But I know that I'm going to have dips,
and I've got tools now as well.
Like, I feel boosted, and I've got even more tools for my self-esteem and my confidence.
But I know what I've learned from you.
I'm going to teach Hannah.
And what amazing little girl she's going to turn into.
Do you know what I mean? So I want to say
thank you for listening. Thank you Pauline,
Mummy Pauline. Thank you Steve for your amazing elephant. I'm with mum there and of course my mum,
I love you. But the trailblazer matthew thank you
ladies please can we because angela did not need to come here this week and she has for us
can we give her a huge round of applause give it up for Angela everybody
I will always remember having coached Angela she remains one of my dear friends today by the way
I'm going to link up in the description where you can go and support Angela's cause if you want to, because she's doing amazing work right now
alongside bringing up her beautiful family. If you want to go through the same process that
transformed Angela's life, you have that opportunity in just three weeks. This, I think, is pretty much the final call
for the live retreat in 2023.
It's happening from the 9th of October until the 15th.
It is the same six-day process,
albeit improved over many years,
that Angela went through that changed her life
and enabled her to find love.
And you can now experience it for yourself.
Go to mhretreat.com to get your space now.
We're down to the last handful.
So this is it.
Don't lose any more time.
Come join us and I'll see you in Florida
in just a few weeks. Outro Music