Love Life with Matthew Hussey - Quieting the Voice in Your Head [Part 1 of 2]

Episode Date: October 28, 2016

Do you hear that? It’s the voice in your head… reminding you of your to-do list, nagging at you about your insecurities, analyzing that confusing text you got from your guy last night. This voice is normal, but it can cause problems if it becomes too loud and drowns out your ability to relax. In this episode of LOVE Life – Part 1 of 2 – I’ll hand you one strategy to separate yourself from your inner voice, and give you a challenge that will set you up to learn the ultimate solution in Part 2.

Hello everybody this is Matthew Hussey with Love Life. Do you know the number one most powerful technique you can use to get any man addicted to you and only you? Take a second to see if you can figure it out. Don't worry if you can't guess what it is. It's simple to use but it's also easy to overlook which is why most women will never use it. I'll tell you what this subtle trick is in just a moment. But first, let's get to the episode. I wanted to talk today about why it's so difficult for people to enjoy a massage. I was getting a massage recently and I found that I was suffering from a particular problem of not being able to enjoy the massage for a little bit. And I know I've had this in the past as well. You know, the difference between thinking you're going to enjoy something and then actually

enjoying it. Now, there are many reasons that people don't enjoy getting a massage. One of those reasons is that they have a stranger touching them who they don't know and they're not comfortable with. For other people, it's that they're not comfortable with their own bodies. For other people, it's that they're afraid to say what they want. But there is one reason that I believe it's difficult for people to enjoy a massage that supersedes all of these. And that is the voice inside people's heads. Uh, it's known, uh, in some psychology as the ego. Um, it's the self is the part of you that continuously talks to yourself and tells a story and analyzes and thinks about things, uh, past, present, and future insecurities. But it's that constant voice in your head. I know that I was in this massage and literally

this is an example of some of the stuff that was going through my head. I'm laying there and I'm thinking, oh, there's those two biographies that I really want to read. I both want to read Churchill's biography and Franklin's biography. I really don't have time to read both. I don't know which one to read first. That's the thing. And then I started thinking, I really need to read more, but I don't have enough time. I need to make more time for myself. Ow, that actually hurts the way she's massaging my foot right now. Shall I tell her? But the thing is, maybe it's doing me some good. So maybe I shouldn't get her to go softer because then it won't do my foot as good. And also, if she starts going softer, maybe she'll now go softer on my whole body. And I don't want her to go softer on my whole body. So maybe I just ride it out and see if it gets easier. And I kept going and going and going like this. And you can imagine right now, as I'm doing this, I'm not relaxing. It's the furthest thing from what I'm doing. Instead, I'm laying there stressing. I'm just doing it while someone is massaging me. I'm stressing at a rate of 150 bucks an hour. So it's not helping in the way that we think it is. And that's because our mind is always

coming with us. In other words, that voice in your head walks into the massage room with you. And I know that maybe you haven't felt this on the massage table, but maybe you felt it somewhere else where you tried to go to relax, but that voice in your head followed you where you went. And this is a big problem. It's something we have to learn to eliminate. And one of the things that I want to talk about is how to begin by eliminating that voice. Well, firstly, understand that the voice is there and it's not the same thing as you. It's in some ways separate from you. In other words, you can separate yourself from that voice in your head and see it objectively. It's been described by some meditators as when you get angry, notice that you're angry, but don't feel like you are an

angry person. Just notice that you're angry right now. When that voice in your head is saying, I really need to read more, you're able to separate yourself from that voice and say, okay, right now I have this insecurity that I don't read enough. I'm distancing myself from that and understanding what I can do about it. This is the difference between being the voice in your head and understanding the voice in your head and understanding the voice in your head. And it's in that space in between that you actually have all of your power. Now in the next episode, and I want to keep this short and sweet right now, because I want to create this awareness of this voice in your head. In the next episode, I'm going to tell you how to

deal with this voice in your head. How do you actually make it so that you can not just eliminate it, but understand how to move away from it and recognize it for what it is. Right now, here's what my challenge to you is between now and the next episode. Notice just how many times that voice comes to you in a day, because the beginning point is recognition. But in the next episode, I'm going to tell you how to actually deal with it. Okay. So join me in the next episode of Love Life. I can't wait to speak to you then. If by the way, you have a question or if you have a comment about the show, join me on Facebook for the discussion. It is facebook.com forward slash

coach Matthew Hussey. I will see you there. And I can't wait to speak to you in the next episode. Now, on to the answer to the question that I asked you at the start of the show. What's the number one most powerful technique to get any man addicted to you? Compliments. It sounds simple, and it is. A well-given compliment will make him melt in your

hands, but the exact words you need to use are crucial and easy to mess up. That's why I've created a special guide for you where I give you my five most powerful compliments that you can give to any man to create a deeper connection. To download your five compliments guide, just go to lovelifepodcast.com forward slash compliments.