Love Life with Matthew Hussey - (Rewind): They’re "Not Sure" They Can Commit to You? These Words Put YOU in Control
Episode Date: January 24, 2025"I’m not sure if I’m ready for a relationship with you right now. . .” Nobody wants to hear these words. Especially when it’s coming from someone you genuinely care about. Someone you...’ve invested time and energy in. . . and someone you feel could be the right person for you in the long term. It leaves you wishing they could just get over their indecision... If that sounds familiar, I have a simple solution: Because there IS a right way and a wrong way to handle this situation... The wrong way is to try and convince them of all the reasons you’re a great fit (even if every reason is true). This can accidentally push them further away. . . The right way to handle this situation is to meet their confusion with love and kindness, while also standing strong and respecting yourself. (Here’s the surprising part: this is actually an incredible opportunity to show your value and remind them of what they risk losing.) --- ►► Ask Matthew AI Your Biggest Dating Question for Free Now at. . . → http://www.AskMH.com ►► Order My New Book, "Love Life" at → http://www.LoveLifeBook.com ►► FREE Video Training: “Dating With Results” → http://www.DatingWithResults.com
Transcript
Discussion (0)
I know that I need someone who is completely in because I wouldn't want to be with someone
who isn't 100% about wanting to be with me. What's up everybody? Welcome back to Love Life, the podcast. This episode is one from
the archives, a nice little rewind episode for you. I hope you enjoy it and if you have any feedback or questions for future episodes email us podcast at Matthewhussy.com
I want to talk about some words that men say to women that women do not look
forward to. I'm not sure if I am ready for a relationship. I'm assuming that
you're watching this because this is a guy that you do actually care about that despite saying he's not really ready for a relationship or that he's
not sure is not necessarily a bad guy but just a guy who is confused and a guy that despite his
confusion you still either like or love and both want the best for and want the best possible shot at being with. So with
that in mind, here's what you can say. It seems like you need to go away and
figure out what you want and be on your own for a while. And I want your
happiness more than anything in the world. I just want you to be happy. So I feel like you need to go and be alone
in order to figure out what you want.
And I hope that I'm still here when you're ready.
But until then, I know that I need someone
who is completely in,
because I wouldn't wanna be with someone
who isn't 100% about wanting to
be with me. Here's what I love about you saying all of this. He's not sure what he
wants and trying to make him more sure about you isn't gonna make him more sure.
All it's gonna do is make him feel like he's being sold on something. Instead
you saying I think you're right. You
need to go away and figure out what you want and you need to be alone to do that.
He's now scared because he's like now I have to go and be on my own and maybe I
don't want to do that and since she's making it okay for me to go and be on my
own and figure myself out it doesn't even seem as attractive anyway.
It's not like I have anything to rebel against
because she's telling me to go and do it.
Then when you couple that with saying,
I want you to do that because I care about your happiness,
your happiness means the world to me.
It comes from such a loving and sweet and pure place.
It's not like you're just trying to manipulate him.
You really want him to go and find out what he wants.
Because the last thing that you want is for him to be unhappy in this situation. So he now sees this
unbelievably loving woman in front of him that he's about to lose. Then when you say, I hope I'm
still here when you're ready, that notion is introducing that seed of doubt. Like, you're
leaving now and I'm encouraging
you to do it because I want you to be happy but you're also showing that it
may not happen. There is that chance that he may not get everything that he wants
at the end of the day by doing this. And then lastly when you say to him, I want
someone who is 100% in with me. I want someone who really knows what they want.
That's what I deserve. That's when you show your value, that's when you show you respect
yourself, that's when you show you love yourself and that's why you couldn't
accept anything less than someone who's sure about you. This whole response is
loving, it's kind but it's also strong and it shows him that you're someone
that he truly is gonna be losing out on
in a big way in his life.
Thank you so much for listening to the episode I hope you enjoyed it. Before you
go make sure that you do this today I promise you every week you are missing
out by not doing what I'm about to say. I am sending a private email to a group of people who have
registered for it every single Friday. The email is called The Three Relationships and
every email is packed with advice on how you can improve one of the three relationships
that I believe determine the quality of your life. Your relationship with other people, your relationship with yourself,
and your relationship with life itself.
It's a super valuable email.
People really look forward to it.
This is not the kind of email that you don't open.
It's the kind of email you can't wait to see
in your inbox every Friday.
Go over to the3relationships.com
to sign up for that email for free,
and I will see you in your inbox this
Friday. Thanks for listening everyone, I'll see you in the next episode. Be well and love life. Bye!