Love Life with Matthew Hussey - The Effort IS the Reward

Episode Date: May 27, 2016

How do you reward yourself for putting in hard work? Is it with a glass of wine, a new pair of shoes, perhaps binge-watching your guilty pleasure show on Netflix? You definitely deserve to treat yourself, but today I’m sharing why I believe that the best reward of all is an internal one: your effort in and of itself. 

Matthew Hussey here with Love Life. Quick question for you. Do you know the nine words that you can text a man that will make you completely irresistible to him? No, I'm not talking about sexting. This is much more intelligent because it allows you to keep your standard and drive him crazy with desire at the same time.

Think you can guess what it is? I'll come back to this at the end of the show today, so make sure not to miss a minute. So I woke up this morning and my wonderful cameraman, Jameson, passed me a video of David Belisle in his speech to his Little League team from Rhode Island. And I have to confess, I know nothing about Little League. So forgive me for talking from a place of ignorance about the sport.

But what I will say is the speech that he gave to his team, who had lost this very important game, was very moving and very touching. And I actually think brought up some interesting lessons. So this is the speech that I'm talking about right now. Everybody, heads up high. Heads up high. Let's talk for a moment here. Look, I got to see your eyes, guys.

Okay. There's no disappointment, okay, in your effort. Okay. In the whole tournament, in the whole season. It's been an incredible journey, okay? We fought, look at the score, eight to seven, okay? 12 to 10 in hits, came to the last out, we didn't quit. That's us. So I heard this and it was a very beautiful words. And I'll tell you why. This was a team of kids who had lost. And in that time, you could see they're all sitting around and they're crying and some of them are sobbing and

you're watching this and your heart is breaking for how much hard work they've put in. And he's talking to them about the fact that it's not what them losing isn't the important part, that he's proud to have worked with a team of guys who really committed. And that's the thing that should make them proud of themselves, is that that will last a lot longer than the victory. I think so often in life, we're holding out for the victory. We're holding out for the win. And when you value the effort over the result, which is what this coach was talking about, you can have real pride when you go home at night. I was actually going through some very,

very old notes that I'd written the other day. The kind of notes that you read from 10 years ago in your life. And there was amongst all these scrap notes, there was this old Tony Robbins quote that I'd written down and it said, the effort is the reward. Now here's the funny thing. I read this, this is no joke. I read this maybe three days ago. And when I first read it, I read it and I couldn't remember the context of it. And I thought, well, that, I don't understand that. The effort is the reward. I don't, I don't understand that. The effort is the reward. I don't get that. Yesterday, before I watched this speech, it clicked for me.

And it clicked for me because yesterday I went to the gym. And after the gym, after working out for an hour, which, by the way, left me feeling incredibly sick and nauseous. I felt awful at the end of this session. I went home and an hour later, I got this adrenaline rush. And I don't mean literally a chemical rush. What I mean is I got this kind of metaphorical rush where I felt like I'd really achieved something already that morning. I had put effort in. Now, I didn't see the reward already. It's not like you necessarily go to the gym and all of a sudden you go home and you're ripped up the way you want to be. No, that takes months. But I got home and I felt that joy of

having put in the effort and the reward. People say, oh, the reward is I'm now going to go and get a massage or the reward is I get to now kick back and, you know, watch my favorite TV show. Those are artificial rewards that we put in and they have their place. But the real reward is that, you know know you did something, you know you put effort into something, and that makes your time afterwards feel so much more incredible and magical because you feel like you've used the time. And that's what this coach was really getting at in this speech, is these guys put in so much effort, and that effort is the reward. The reward isn't the win, because the win can come later.

But real champions derive their satisfaction from the effort that they put in, because that, my friends, will last far longer than the victory will. So thank you for listening. Go watch that speech. If you go to howtogettheguy.com forward slash blog, we we'll put it up on the blog and you can go and see it for yourself there. So thank you for listening, my friends. Go put in the effort. Don't worry about the victories. They will come sooner or later, but get your satisfaction from the effort and how much pride that makes you feel. So have you guessed what those nine words are that will make you irresistible to men? No? Well, I've included that and eight other equally effective scripts in a free guide I've created for you called Nine Magic Texts No Man Can Resist. The text I was talking about at the top of the show is number two of nine.

Just copy and paste it or any of the nine texts tonight and he'll be eating out of the palm of your hand. To get your free guide, just go to lovelifepodcast.com forward slash Texas.