Love Life with Matthew Hussey - When Your Friend Ditches You for Her New Boyfriend, Say THIS…

Episode Date: September 2, 2016

You love your friend. You want nothing but the best for her, including an amazing relationship. So why does it feel so sucky when she falls hard for a new guy and wants to spend alllllll of her time with him? You don’t want her to make a mistake, of course, but could there be something else going on? In today’s LOVE Life, we explore what happens when your BFF takes a “Boyfriend Hiatus” and what you can say to her to bring her out of it to spend some time with you. But be warned: she’s not the only one getting a reality check in today’s episode!  

I'm Matthew Hussey and this is Love Life. If you've ever felt like you didn't know the right words to say to a man to create attraction and chemistry, then you can't afford to miss what I have for you at the end of today's episode. Stay tuned because I'm going to hand you five phrases that are so simple yet so powerful with men that you're going to be furious at me for not giving this to you years ago. Today, we are talking about boyfriend hiatus, which I guess can be girlfriend hiatus as well, but this question is from a lady. So let's answer it this way round. My girlfriend is on a boyfriend hiatus and I want her back. She has a new boyfriend, but she's slowly slipping into that boyfriend hiatus where all she does is work and hang out with her boyfriend. I'm very happy for her,

but I need to pull her out of this slippery slope because I've been there. Firstly, I think women are much more confusing to other women than even men are because women spend their entire lives trying to get their friends into relationships and then spend the second half of their lives trying to get them out of them. It's like they want them to be happy. Like, I just want you to find a guy. You really deserve a guy. And then of course she finds a guy. And what do women do when they're happy and they find a guy? They start spending all of their time with that guy. It's a really tough one. When I hear women talking about this, I think, okay, firstly, even this question, it includes a lot of eyes, right? I'm happy for her, but I need

to pull her out of this slippery slope because I've been there. This is very kind of me question. And I wonder how much this person is really talking about their friend being happy versus themselves feeling a little bit lonely that they've now lost their friend. So that's the way I look at it. It may be a little harsh. And the truth is sometimes we do see our friends going after someone or in a relationship with someone and we get frustrated because we think, oh my God, they're going too far. They're going to blow it. You know, they're being too needy. They're being too desperate. Any waking minute outside of their work, they're spending with this person. This isn't good for their relationship. They're going to burn out on each other. I need to be the one to save them a little bit. And that's fine. And if that's true, then you go up to your friend and you say, listen,

I really need a girl's night with you. I miss you. I'm excited about seeing you. I love, I'm excited about your relationship. I want to hear all about it. We have to have a girls night so you can tell me the great part about that is you're not in conflict with their relationship. The worst thing you can do is go to your friend and say, listen, you spend all of your time with your guy. Now I never see you. I don't see the point in texting you or calling you anymore because you never answer blah, blah, blah. That's only going to create this element of friction between the two of you, which is going to make her associate you with negative feelings.

Instead, tell her you want to hear about this thing that's making her incredibly happy. She's going to want to talk about that all day long. So a girl's night, tell me all about this new guy of yours. I want to hear everything. I'm so excited for you. That's going to get her out of that pattern and be a little understanding. Because my guess is if you found someone that made you that happy and you wanted to spend every waking minute with them for a little while, you might be a crappy friend too. So with that, I say, be the best friend you can be, be as understanding as you can be. And in the meantime, go out and find your own sources of happiness outside of that friend because we all know the disasters of relying on one friend for too much of our validation.

All right, that's it for me today. Thank you so much for having me. I'll see you next time. Now, before you get too mad at me for not giving you the five phrases years ago that could have saved you all that high this guide is based on years and years of studying the exact words to say to trigger deep chemistry with men i'm happy to say that all of my effort was worth it because these five phrases work so incredibly well with men. So let's not wait another minute to download these five phrases.

Just go to lovelifepodcast.com forward slash compliments.