Lovett or Leave It - Babydog 2024 (Live from Madison, WI!)

Episode Date: July 21, 2024

RNC you next Tuesday! We bid farewell to America’s Dairyland, but not before an incredible show at Madison’s Barrymore Theater. This week, Victoria Vincent is anything but conventional. Mandela Ba...rnes and Fran Hong break down the far right and the Frank Lloyd Wrong. Thomas Lennon helps our audience find the plot, and we finish off the evening with a delicious spin of The Cheese Wheel. Did we mention we’re in Wisconsin?Tour dates & cities: crooked.com/events For a closed-captioned version of this episode, click here. For a transcript of this episode, please email transcripts@crooked.com and include the name of the podcast. 

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, Madison! It is great to be back at the Barrymore Theater. And lovely to see all of you. Five days of watching Republicans nonstop. Is that Pod Save America or a shy closeted gay delegate at the nightly Hilton orgy? Five days of watching Republicans nonstop. You get it. We've got a great show for you tonight. Victoria Vincent is here to turn many a Republican's trash into a comedian's treasure.
Starting point is 00:00:54 Former Lieutenant Governor Mandela Barnes is here. State Rep Fran Hong is here. Thomas Lenin is here. And then we all put our heads together for some good old curd mentality. But first, let's get into it. What a week. The state of Wisconsin unclenched this weekend as the Republican convention in Milwaukee drew to a close.
Starting point is 00:01:27 The highlight of the RNC to me at least, West Virginia Governor Jim Justice's obese bulldog Baby Dog, which he brought on stage with him. Everybody gets one problematic it girl. And by God, mine is baby dog, the Republican bulldog. Speaking of slobbering, here's Nikki Haley. Donald Trump has my strong endorsement period. As a reminder, here's what Nikki Haley said, not in 2016, not after she left his administration, but in February of this year. They know what a disaster he's been and will continue to be for our party.
Starting point is 00:02:16 They're just too afraid to say it out loud. I feel no need to kiss the ring. Which means that even though she had no need to kiss the ring, she did it anyway. Because she wanted to do it. That's how much of a ring freak Nikki Haley is. She didn't need to do it.
Starting point is 00:02:38 She told us herself, she wants to do it. She wants to kiss that ring. Mwah. Like how her wanting to do it is supposed to needing to do it is like how I always set up a truth or dare game in Wisconsin that results in my eating huge amounts of dairy. After promising John and Tommy I wouldn't do that, thereby ruining the van ride back to O'Hare. And I need to do it. And I need to do it. And I want to do it.
Starting point is 00:03:07 Speaking of people you don't want to go to a second location with, Florida Congressman Matt Gaetz taunted his nemesis, former speaker Kevin McCarthy, while he was doing a CNN interview on the floor of the RNC. What night are you speaking? Are you speaking tonight? No? Hey, you're not, if you took that stage, you would get booed off, you would get booed off the stage.
Starting point is 00:03:35 Gates's girlfriend would have been there to keep him under control, but she's at camp. We also have that moment again, but from the CNN camera. One who's not coming back, and then the other part that you have is one person who raised the issue. He's got an ethics complaint about paying sleeping with a 17 year old. It's like Rashomon. I want you to know something. I don't understand the reference I just made, but I know it applies to seeing a story from
Starting point is 00:04:11 multiple angles. I could not tell you one other thing. I know it also relates to Run Lola Run, but maybe not. After the exchange, Wisconsin Republican Derek Van Orden tweeted at Gates, Yeah, yeah, I know, but just here's the thing, we're gonna deal with it. He gets off a sick one. Just let's, that's, it's okay. He tweeted at Gates, I just saw this. Tubby did not need to be physically held back.
Starting point is 00:04:42 Don't like the Tubby. He pulled a hold me back bro move to look like a tough guy because he is in fact a little bitch. Here's what's fucked up about this. That, that's the party that's completely united. Compared to Democrats right now, that's what unity looks like.
Starting point is 00:05:06 Then on Wednesday, Matt Gaetz gave his speech and even more memorably, debuted a new face. For those at home, we're showing it. You know what they say, face New York, body LA, haunted mannequin Milwaukee. It's terrible work. You can still tell it's him. My team is always telling me I can't get Boat Docs in the green room before the show.
Starting point is 00:05:35 And purely on a logistical level, boy were they wrong. The fuck? I'm sorry, but I don't know who did that, but I pictured the doctor from Deadwood. Like, he's coming in with his leather satchel, being like, I just took a bullet out of a cowboy. What do you need? Filler? Let's see. Bite on this stick, Mr. Gates. This bit of ether and then the injections will begin.
Starting point is 00:06:14 Meanwhile, a fake tweet supposedly by a Grindr exec called the RNC basically Grindr Superbowl. And that post went viral on Twitter. Though by all accounts, Grindr was actually pompon, which I've heard. I really don't... There's no way for me to talk about this without you people doing innuendo. Trump also announced his VP candidate, JD VD. Vance, famous for writing a book. I've never heard it said. Vance is famous for writing a book about a hillbilly he killed.
Starting point is 00:06:53 I haven't read it. I'm trying to pick up the film of pieces. I don't know. And then enjoying the Democratic chaos, the Trump campaign said it wouldn't commit to a date for the vice presidential debate, saying in a statement, we don't know who the Democrat nominee for vice president is going to be, so we can't lock in a date before their convention. To do so would be unfair to Gavin Newsom, JB Pritzker, Gretchen Whitmer, or whoever Kamala Harris picks as her running aide. Whomever. That's by the way, that's what, don't applaud that.
Starting point is 00:07:26 Don't applaud that. That's, that's exactly what's wrong with us. How do we have all the gays and women, and they are mopping the floors with us, bitchy energy-wise. We're getting out trolled by a came 100% of, by, and for divorced dads. Step it up, people. Stop doing your little brat dances for five seconds and get in the fight. I want you to know something. This is how I know that I've been Wisconsin-filled, that I've been here for long enough, because before I had to think to myself, is the...
Starting point is 00:07:59 the brat... brat... Is it Brat Summer? Speaking of running mates, the biting campaign on Wednesday tweeted out a newly unearthed audio of JD Vance saying this. I certainly would like abortion to be illegal nationally. Even more disturbing is the video in which Vance sits on Santa's lap. And then the RNC arrived at its finale.
Starting point is 00:08:27 First we got the Hulk. Last week when they took a shot at my hero and they tried to kill the next president of the United States. Enough was enough. Boo. Yeah, I know. Boo, sure. But it's fucking cool.
Starting point is 00:08:50 That's cool. Anyone thinks that's not cool, you're lying to yourselves. That's cool. We would kill to have a Hulk. Who's our Hulk? Chapel Rome? It's too soon. It's too soon.
Starting point is 00:09:00 It's too soon. I think our Hulk Hogan is books. I'm so... I don't know who our Hulk is. Mark Ruffalo. Ugh. I'm not, that's a bad guess. I guess. But more of the kids, it's not the Hulk, Mark Ruffalo,
Starting point is 00:09:22 it's the kids are all right, Mark Ruffalo. Sad dad, Mark Ruffalo, it's the kids are all right, Mark Ruffalo. Sad dad, Mark Ruffalo. They get the fucking Hulk, Mark Ruffalo. We get a sensitive lesbian drama. Sucks. I want Hulk Hogan. Why don't we get a Hulk Hogan? Ugh, we're gonna expand Medicare. No, it's never that.
Starting point is 00:09:52 It's always my immigrants. Mr. Hogan continued. Let Trumpamania run wild, brother! Let Trumpamania roll wild, brother! Let Trumpamania roll again! Hey man, the last time Trumpamania went wild, we were one locked corridor away from seeing the bottom of Mike Pence's shoes. You know what? That's pearls before swine, alright? There's been a million fucking jokes about Mike Pence almost getting his ass hung. And that shocked you.
Starting point is 00:10:29 Being vivid, you never thought about seeing the bottom of his feet. Eric Trump spoke, which led to Trump's creation of a new facial expression, which is a face that says, I wish you were Hulk Hogan. Trump looked so much happier during Paul Kogan's speech than he did during Eric or Don Jr's. It's incredible. It's incredible. Then Trump took the stage with his name and lights behind him.
Starting point is 00:10:56 That fucking fag. I mean, just, what the hell? Eddie Redmayne at the Tony's is less gay. This is like, what are we doing here? What are we doing here? Trump has always said that his favorite movie is Citizen Kane and his takeaway from that film is make your name real big. Trump addressed the assassination attempt at the very top of his speech.
Starting point is 00:11:27 There was blood pouring everywhere and yet in a certain way I felt very safe because I had God on my side. Trump went on to say, but not the God you're thinking of. We love Baal folks, don't we? We love Ba'al, folks, don't we? We love Ba'al. We're all gonna, we're gonna make Ba'al the most beautiful calf in the world, a solid gold calf for Ba'al, many are saying.
Starting point is 00:11:54 I don't know. If I remember my Diablo III. Think back to my religious studies of Diablo 3. I don't remember where all comes between Asmodon and Mephisto after. Thank you, sir. At one point, Trump also kissed the firefighter's uniform of the man who was killed during the Trump assassination attempt. Don Jr. was reportedly kicking himself for not hiding inside the uniform. I don't know if this is allowed.
Starting point is 00:12:43 I don't know if this is allowed. I don't know. But as predicted by me, Trump did a 20-minute topper on the assassination attempt with a pay-on to unity and then went right into his usual stump speech about Democrats, the media, and immigrants. By the way, you know who's taking the jobs? The jobs that are created? One hundred and seven percent of those jobs are taken by illegal aliens. You can trust those numbers. Trump-Ed is numbers guy, baby dog, all over it.
Starting point is 00:13:15 Maybe it's over 100% because immigrants are taking impossible jobs that do not and cannot exist, like square circle specialist and time-traveling grandpa murderer. Afterward, RNC chair Michael Watley said this during his Fox postmortem. There's some criticism of the second half of his speech in that it turned rather dark
Starting point is 00:13:38 as if he was looking for retribution when he becomes the president again. Any comment? Well, the president has been very clear that his retribution is going to be success. First of all, they've tried this because he said, you know, I will be your retribution and they realized that must look terribly.
Starting point is 00:13:56 It must have numbers that show that people fucking hate that. So he's like, my retribution is your success. His success is retribution. So we should just reverse that on him. But in a BET interview released Wednesday, President Biden again insisted he was staying in the race. When asked if there's anything that might make him reevaluate that he said this.
Starting point is 00:14:14 If there had some medical condition that emerged, if somebody, if doctors came to me and said, you got this problem, that problem. Responded Biden's doctors. Nearly two thirds of Americans say that Biden should withdraw from the race according to a new poll by AP, sort of proving Biden's point. The economy is now so good, two thirds of the American people are elites. Could you believe that? That's how hot Joe Biden's run in this economy. Two thirds of the economy is just pundits,
Starting point is 00:14:51 elites and wealthy donors. That's incredible. That's an incredible thing Joe Biden's done. I'm getting a bit, all right, all right, all right, all right. Listen, listen, we're gonna get through it, all right? There are fine people on both sides. I accept your boos as intended. Deserved. I deserved.
Starting point is 00:15:17 I'd boo me too. And then boo you. Joe Scarborough on Thursday all about joining the calls for Biden's... Joe Scarborough on Thursday all about join the calls for Biden's, for Joe Scarborough on, Joe Scarborough said something, let's roll it. It's really incumbent on people that are around Joe Biden to step up at this point and help the president and help the man they love
Starting point is 00:15:45 and do the right thing. This is not going to end well if it continues to drag out. Look at the events of yesterday, the events of the last three weeks. Anyway, Joe Biden loves morning Joe. This would be like if I settled in to watch Hacks and Gene Smart looked straight down the camera and said, John Lovett needs to quit comedy.
Starting point is 00:16:11 And I won't Gene Smart. I will finish the job. Whatever that means. Meanwhile, the chorus calling on Biden to step aside has continued to grow. We're getting more details of Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer's private conversations, presumably because the private versions of those conversations weren't working. On Thursday, Montana's...
Starting point is 00:16:34 That's why. Why do you think we're hearing about it? On Thursday, Montana Senator John Tester joined Vermont Senator Peter Welch in officially calling for Biden to drop out of the race. If President Biden is dropping out, it's news to him. The president said in a statement Friday while recovering from COVID, I look forward to getting back on the campaign trail next week to continue exposing the threat of Donald Trump's Project 2025 agenda while making the case for my own record and the vision I have for America,
Starting point is 00:17:00 one where we save our democracy, protect our rights and freedoms and create opportunity for everyone. But that's sort of how it works, right? He's got to be 100% in until the moment he's not. It's like when you're thinking about breaking up with someone, but haven't pulled the trigger yet. It's I love you so much right up until it's we need to talk, or they could beat you to it. Said Biden, the stakes are high and the choice is clear. Together we will win. You know, sometimes they'll build a fake bus stop outside of a nursing home, Said Biden, the stakes are high and the choice is clear. Together we will win. You know, sometimes they'll build a fake bus type
Starting point is 00:17:27 outside of a nursing home. So if people wander outside, they'll just wait for the bus. No bad ideas in a brainstorm. Couple of columns, little rose garden. A couple columns. A little rose garden. You don't even need any corners. Just a round space.
Starting point is 00:17:52 Meanwhile, during a campaign speech in North Carolina on Thursday, Vice President Kamala Harris took aim at Trump's new running mate, JD Vance, who addressed the RNC the night before. Frankly, what is very telling is what he did not talk about on that stage. He did not talk about Project 2025, their 900 page blueprint for a second Trump term. He did not talk about it because their plans are extreme and they are divisive.
Starting point is 00:18:30 I like where she's going, but that she didn't change the subject or trail off with a well anyway. I'm not sure it's going to cut it. Vice President Harris continued. In recent days, they've been trying to portray themselves as the party of unity. But here's the thing, here's the thing. If you claim to stand for unity, you need to do more than just use the word. You cannot claim you stand for unity if you are pushing an agenda that deprives whole groups of Americans of basic freedoms, opportunity, and dignity. Now land the plane, Madam Vice President. Defensively attack Lester Holt for never mentioning how Trump sucks.
Starting point is 00:19:21 And even as calls for Biden's ouster grows, the Biden administration has continued to roll out progressive policies. In a speech before the NAACP, President Biden called on Congress to cap rent increases at five percent nationwide. It does seem as though Biden has entered the bargaining phase. Though Biden struggled to read the teleprompter and mistakenly announced an even more renter-friendly policy. The idea that corporate owned housing is able to raise your rent three, four hundred bucks a month or something under what I'm about to announce, they can't raise it more than
Starting point is 00:19:54 $55. That is the most veep shit. That is the most veep because then it's like, what do we do? Well, now the policy is $55. Okay. No backsies. Instead of America's renters. $55?
Starting point is 00:20:18 Okay. This is the thing about our new slot machine style Biden. Sometimes he pays out with badass policies. Other times he vows to defeat Medicare. So there's a little bit of luck to it. Some people think it's about how you jiggle the handle. The president is reportedly on the brink of endorsing major Supreme Court reforms as well, including term limits for the justices and an ethics code with an actual enforcement
Starting point is 00:20:52 mechanism. Because you do want to end on a good joke. Speaking of finishing, the New York Times this week asked the question, how did raw dogging transcend its obscene origins? This is the New York Times. To find more mainstream usage over the last few months. The article contains the sentence, you can even raw dog life
Starting point is 00:21:17 by being sober. That's the paper of record. The article was a follow up to last month's smash investigative piece, That's the paper of record. The article was a follow-up to last month's smash investigative piece, barebacking why young people may not be referring to horses. But some of them are referring to horses. Now the piece failed to credit the true popularizer of using raw dogging in this way, Jaboukie Young-White, who in 2019 tweeted,
Starting point is 00:21:46 How are people out here with no therapy, not taking any prescribed or illicit drugs, just raw dogging reality? That's what actually set it off. And I do believe Jaboukie deserves credit. But then, the Love It or Leave It writing team did some sleuthing. But, but we can go back even further because the true visionaries first used raw dogging as a non-sexual diphamism in this way received little to no recognition.
Starting point is 00:22:13 A Twitter user named Crappy Fumes in 2015 tweeted, Sometimes I ride the subway without a book, headphones, phone or sunglasses or as I like to call it, raw dogging New York. That's maybe first, maybe first to it. That's cool. That's cool. Crappy fumes? Love it or leave it, salute to you.
Starting point is 00:22:37 Sure. And finally, speaking of people who love raw dogging, comedy legend Bob Newhart died on Thursday at age 94. Bob was born, I love Bob Newhart, Bob Newhart was born just a month before the Wall Street crash of 29, was a witness to everything from World War II to Vietnam to 9-11 to the pandemic. So maybe we'll have better luck without him. But... But...
Starting point is 00:23:08 Bob Newhart's cause of death? Stampede at Copa America. It's bad timing. Got as healthy as an ox. I love Bob Newhart. Do you know how good the Bob Newhart comedy specials are? If anybody here know about that? Mind of the...
Starting point is 00:23:24 Mind of the buttoned up man or buttoned down man. The buttoned down mind the Bob Newhart comedy specials are? If anybody here know about that, Mind of the Buttoned-Up Man or Buttoned-Down Man, the buttoned-down mind of Bob Newhart. That's what it's called. Has anybody heard it? Oh, you should do yourself a favor. Check out the 1960s comedy specials of Bob Newhart. I'm cool. I'm a really cool guy.
Starting point is 00:23:44 And before we go, it's time for a little segment we're calling America's Least Wanted. This week we're here in the beautiful Badger State, so we're visiting one of our old nemeses, Wisconsin Republican Senate nominee and fellow Californian, Eric Hovde. I heard a moo in there. Here's a refresher. Hovde is an ultra rich Trump backed California bank owner and real estate developer who put on a cowboy costume and came to Wisconsin in an attempt to unseat two term democratic incumbent Senator Tammy Baldwin, friend of the show.
Starting point is 00:24:24 He has repeatedly expressed his dislike for single moms, elderly people, and we assume the most beloved members of each of your families as well. Perhaps to smooth over his nasty habit of scapegoating black single mothers for America's problems, Hovde went on a historically black tech show on Juneteenth to show that he gets it. Let's take a look. Look, I've spent a lot of time in black culture and as Tor look. Look I've spent a lot of time in black culture and as Tori knows I've spent a lot of time in places like Africa
Starting point is 00:24:50 because I have homeless shelters or abandoned kids. Cannot be overstated for those at home how uncomfortable the people in this video are. Every single one. Eric Huvdy included. Good job, Eric. That'll show him. Saying you understand American black culture because you've been to Africa is like me saying I understand women because I traveled through my mother's birth canal. Which she never shuts up about.
Starting point is 00:25:16 Women, am I right? Hovde spoke at the RNC on Tuesday where he yelled a lot and looked like a main cast member on a new season of the angriest, most hate-filled White Lotus season. We are blessed to live in the greatest country in human history. America, our home. That's fucking terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible.
Starting point is 00:25:45 Imagine being such an uninspiring speaker that you can't even stick the landing of America is the greatest country in human history. Getting tepid applause for that line at the RNC probably puts you on some sort of Heritage Foundation hit list. Biden won Wisconsin by fewer than 21,000 votes in 2020 and statewide races here since have been decided by similarly razor thin margins. It's likely the Senate race will be no different and the stakes could not be higher.
Starting point is 00:26:08 So get organized Wisconsin, because this moment demands the leadership and all business haircut that only a seasoned Midwestern lesbian like Tammy Baldwin can deliver. Love, Tammy. I'm on the floor with this fucking guy. So if you want to send Eric Hovde back to where he belongs, the part of California that's rich but has no celebrities, go to vote save America dot com slash 2024 right now to find out how to get involved.
Starting point is 00:26:44 And if you were here in Wisconsin, just a reminder, you don't just have November, you have a primary on August 13th. Everybody here know about the primary on August 13th? Everybody making sure that people in their lives vote no on these Republican backed amendments? Because because they want to use that money for their own fucking shit. Instead of helping people. You all know that. And that's America's Least Wanted. Alright, we have a great show for you up next. Victoria Vincent has two choices. Make believe or can you believe it?
Starting point is 00:27:23 Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. My next guest is a hilarious comedian. And after this week, we need it. Please welcome to the stage, Victoria Vincent. Hi, it's good to see you again. How are you? Come on in.
Starting point is 00:27:48 Come on in over here. Good to see you. Welcome back. Oh, that was my skirt. Thank you so much. That was for you guys. So obviously this week was the Republican National Convention. Did you see the new face that Matt Gaetz debuted?
Starting point is 00:28:09 That's all I saw. That's all. Couldn't stop. So, and we have his previous work here. Let's go to the next. So first of all. Is there a third choice? I... Hehehe
Starting point is 00:28:28 Uh... I support people doing whatever. Oh, okay. You know? For don't you? I just like, people want Botox, people want filler, people want whatever they want. I say go with God. Yeah, go with God to someone who does it. Yeah. Yeah, I go with God to someone who does it. Yeah. Yeah. Do you think that the person that
Starting point is 00:28:51 did the injecting or taping or whatever it is that is going on in this photo, do you think they are just a die-hard Democratic voter? Or do you think they canvass knock on doors? Like, how much of an insider did we have? I would like to say that it's that they're just democratic because there's no way that why so many of them come back and they look like evil villains it doesn't help it doesn't I mean I I wouldn't have got behind them anyways
Starting point is 00:29:18 you know the women the kids but those eyebrows are like Superman villain. I think the Joker has those. Just needs to settle. Now we all have a sleep demon, so you're welcome, Madison. Did you watch any other Republican National Convention? I think my favorite part were the people who were covering their ear like Nellie did, right? Because honestly, I guess it's not ghetto when you guys do it. And it's crazy to me, but but they were like that was probably one of
Starting point is 00:30:06 the coolest things. Hulk Hogan I think might have been having an aneurysm. I don't know how he's been doing that for so long and nothing's happened. He looks good. Come on he looks good. I know do you know a lot of people of color? Sure, yeah. Okay, because then he doesn't look good. Right, no, I see your point. You can compare him to Florida retiree, he looks great. But no. No, I hear the point there.
Starting point is 00:30:43 We should help him. I think that's why he's so angry. It's the skincare. He doesn't have a 10-step plan like the Sephora girls. So he has to re-channel it into JD Vance. So now it's been a whirlwind of wigs, white supremacy, and some of the worst work we've seen east of West Hollywood at the RNC this week. However, I'm going to quiz you about it in a game we're calling, Now You RNC Me, Now You Don't.
Starting point is 00:31:11 I'm going to give you a moment. You will have to tell us if it's real or if it's fake. If it's real, we will applaud you. If it's fake, I'll go. You have to go to Matt Gaetz's filler person. Oof. I always look surprised. The work's got to settle. Maybe it'll go. You have to go to Matt Gaetz's filler person. Oof. I always look surprised. The work's gotta settle.
Starting point is 00:31:28 Maybe it'll settle. Maybe it'll settle. How about we do it either get it right or a crowd surf. All right. I love that. I love that. That's a punishment for all of us. Rudy Giuliani tripped and fell into a bunch of folding chairs.
Starting point is 00:31:46 That's real, because that's on my depression playlist. Yeah. I'm clearly, on some level, conflicted about Rudy Giuliani falling down onto those folding chairs, because on the one hand, I keep bringing it up and showing it. And on the other hand, I don't feel, he's a man with nothing left. He's just nothing, he's just wandering.
Starting point is 00:32:09 Yeah. He's just a wraith. That's crazy, because we're different people. Um, I was like, what's next? Because the hair dye, I thought, was it. And then, and then here we are. And like, you know, no Tino shade to Biden, but they're toe in toe for what they're doing. They don't like that.
Starting point is 00:32:33 Listen, I know how to play the game. I know what to do in the fall, but let's be people. Let's be people. They're just honestly, they're just a little brittle right now. We're all a bit sensitive because democracy is on the line. Now at the Republican National Convention, the whole crowd did the Macarena. See, I feel like that's fake because most of them don't have rhythm, but I could be wrong. I feel like it's fake.
Starting point is 00:33:08 It is fake. It is fake because it took place at the Democratic National Convention in 1996. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. You know what? I love this clip. I love this clip. Right. Now that was this year, right?
Starting point is 00:33:37 That was this year. That was this year. No, that's the 1996 convention. That's crazy. And here's why I like this clip so much. Because everybody laughs and have your little laughs. These are people who could dance like social media didn't exist. Look at the joy in their eyes.
Starting point is 00:33:58 They're not afraid that the meanest person that their high school has ever produced is going to think for two hours about how to make fun of them on the internet. Didn't exist. Didn't have it. The internet at this point, it's just people, it's just, it's geo-cities. Research, yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:16 They were not doing anything. These people are at peace. That's happiness. We'll never see that again. We'll never see it again. We'll never see it again. We'll never see it again. I've said it once. I've said it a thousand times.
Starting point is 00:34:28 The internet was a mistake. Yeah, listen, there's nothing like 90s joy. There's nothing like it. Look at those suits. Look at those. Who's wearing a pantsuit tonight? Stand up. Come on up here.
Starting point is 00:34:45 I mean, those are, I mean, we have to bring back the pantsuit. What are we doing? That's the social edulation I'm working on in Madison. I like that. And I've talked to your guys' representative about Four Locos. I think we can bring back the original formula. That was a crazy moral panic.
Starting point is 00:35:03 The Four Locos moral panic was insane. It's like, it's rum and coke in a can. It's like, the kids are going to die. What are we doing? And we didn't die. We're here. By the way, Panera got rid of their juiced up lemonade. Well, that one was insane.
Starting point is 00:35:19 Yeah, that was wild. What in the world? They're still selling it, into, they're doubling down. Well, Starbucks is doing it now. That's crazy, you guys. They really want us to die. They're like, the poor love this, and they're trying to kill us all off.
Starting point is 00:35:36 I can't believe that that's legal. You hear so many doctors talking about it. And honestly, how much do you believe that people are going home and adding liquor to that? So then, or is for it? Yeah. Exactly. This guy wants to die.
Starting point is 00:35:49 Let's do it. What are we even doing here? You know? Next up, Marjorie Taylor Greene finally confessed her feelings for Donald Trump during her speech saying and I quote, I'm in love with Donald Trump. I'm in love with the big man in the Oval Office. I can't stop thinking about blonde beach body bitch. Oh. I remember she said the thing about the flag.
Starting point is 00:36:17 I feel like this is, I don't think she said that. Did she say it? That's true. It's pink. Let's go. If I win, he's paying for everyone's true. It's fake. Yeah. Let's go. If I win, he's paying for everyone's tickets. A hairless cat named Mr. America became an instant TikTok celeb after his owner sneaked him into the RNC.
Starting point is 00:36:34 Well, I was going to say, I don't know too many of them who would have a hairless cat. I'm going to say fake. That's correct. I don't want to stereotype. It was the dog. They had the dog. They had baby dog. That's a, yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:50 That dog rules. That's insane. I love that dog. That dog doesn't want to be there. This is forced. That was forced labor. We should do something. That dog is black block.
Starting point is 00:37:02 That dog is a Antifa through and through. That's what we do. That's what we need. Sleeper dogs. Even though Donald Trump was almost assassinated by an AR-15 last weekend, this week RNC attendees could win one for free. American Dream. I feel like that's true. It is true. The US Concealed Carry Association held a giveaway for an AR-15 that convention goers could enter.
Starting point is 00:37:31 So in case you're wondering for you in a moment why things are terrible. Can you believe that? I 100% believe that. That was very easy. That took me two seconds to... Where I grew up, there was a dollar store next to the gun store, and that was pretty common. And people would just be like,
Starting point is 00:37:55 oh, I need something at the dollar store, and I need a gun. That was... That's like 90% of Ohio. They're like, let's get out there. You don't have to agree, but I know where I've been. You guys didn't live that life. Where in Ohio?
Starting point is 00:38:13 I grew up in a suburb of Columbus, but now my parents live in a very rural area where there's a lot of Trump supporters. And what's very funny about that is my dad is a surgeon, and he's actually the only surgeon in that area. So if they want that surgery, they better like black people. You want that? That'll be place.
Starting point is 00:38:37 Yeah. But yeah, Ohio is interesting. I'm learning a lot since they moved out there. What else? What else have What else? What else have you learned? During the pandemic, the hospital my dad worked at had a Christmas party where masks were optional.
Starting point is 00:38:57 And one time I was in Kroger's, shout out to monopolies. One time I was in Kroger's and they had an advertisement for the vaccine and people in that Kroger's in this area were like, what would I need that for? Wow. Spitting on me with no mask. So it's been really good time out there. He did buy 80 acres so at least it's like you know as close as we were gonna get to the 40 acres in a mule. so. I mean, that's right, you guys, let that white guilt sit in. Yeah, why do you think they went, ooh, they were like, mm.
Starting point is 00:39:34 What'd you say? Their reaction was a bit like they were uncomfortable. They were, because they hate that. Listen, I need somewhere to ride out my days when this happens, so what I'm doing is I'm creating a compound. You all are invited. Um, the only requirement is that we all craft, like, an hour a day and play The Sims.
Starting point is 00:39:56 So welcome to my cold. So mules. You're really on that one. It's a donkey and a horse. It is. But the mules can't reproduce. And that's probably why they promised them. Right.
Starting point is 00:40:15 Right? It's sort of like it's a one-off. Yeah. Because you got to make it. They're like, we'll get them this time. And then they even get us. It's like a seedless watermelon. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:23 Where'd this one come from? Exactly. Well, it's been lovely to see you. It's like a seedless watermelon. You know, where'd this one come from? Exactly. Well, it's been lovely to see you. It's been lovely to see you. I got them all right, right? You got them all right. You've won the game. Rust the stage. Victoria, where can people find your, where can they find you? Oh, I thought you were telling me to get out. He's like, where can you go? Get off the thing. I'm on Instagram and TikTok. They're both the handles are, Victoria is OK. That's not a joke.
Starting point is 00:40:55 It's my handle. And I am OK. You can find me there. And then, you know, also, like I said, if you guys want to play The Sims, let me know. Victoria Vincent, everybody. She'll be back for the wheel. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:41:07 That was great. When we come back, your former Lieutenant Governor Mandela Barnes and state representative, Fran Hong. Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!
Starting point is 00:41:17 Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!
Starting point is 00:41:21 Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! And we're back. Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Nice. And we're back! Nice. Please welcome to the stage Wisconsin's own former Lieutenant Governor Mandela Barnes
Starting point is 00:41:32 and your state representative Fran Hong. Hi, thank you for being here. Nice to see you. Good to see you. Come on in. They love you. Come on in. They love you. They love you. That's all for me. You know that, right?
Starting point is 00:41:54 Hi. Hello. It's time for a segment in which we talk about political topics in the Badger State. And at the same time, I get into a state and Badger you about topics. Which is why we're gonna do it in a segment we're calling Frank Lloyd Wrong.
Starting point is 00:42:08 I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry. Fran, it's nice to have you. Thanks for being here. Oh, thank you. I can't get my eyes off that turtleneck.
Starting point is 00:42:22 Yeah. It's great. Yeah, we're saying no. Okay, okay. No, no, don't do the pantsuit. Do the turtleneck. Yeah. It's great. Yeah, we're saying no. OK. OK. No, no, don't do the pantsuit. Do the turtleneck. I can't do a turtleneck.
Starting point is 00:42:30 I have a short neck. Some people have long necks. I have a short neck. I don't do turtlenecks. I don't really like collars. I can't tell you how much shit I got during my campaign for a turtleneck sometimes. Really?
Starting point is 00:42:39 I popped up on a Zoom one day just completely unexpected and I had on a turtleneck and everybody just lost it. Right, no, and I'm with them. Fran, where are you on turtlenecks? Vito. Yeah, what do you think that is though? No, you're right, you're right on the facts. So what do we think the problem is? I clearly do not have a problem with them.
Starting point is 00:43:04 No, no, I know. I think they're too close to like the half sip, especially Wisconsin male politicos where this like weird half sip fleece situation. And I really think it could stop. It's practical. It is practical. It's not. People are saying it's not. I guess it's just sort of like, I don't know, then you're inside.
Starting point is 00:43:25 Okay. Uh, Mandela, you are now president of Power to the Polls. Yes, and thank you for everything. Can you talk a little bit about what Power to the Polls is doing to just get people in the fight right now and what you're hearing in terms of what it's gonna take to get the voters out that we need to get out. So if we look at this election like a turtleneck. There are those who are with us
Starting point is 00:43:54 and there are those who will never be with us. So yeah, no, seriously, thank you and everything that Vote Save America has done to support Power to the Polls. And everything that you've done to support Vote Save America has done to support Power to the Polls. Um, and everything that you've done to support Vote Save America. So, you know, after my race, you know, after the frustration, you know, after, you know,
Starting point is 00:44:12 just thinking about how can I best, you know, stay in the fight, how can I remain involved? I started by, you know, with organizing, and I want to continue to be an organizer. It's very important to me to look at how we viewed our shortcomings and the shortcomings of our party infrastructure in general and how do we fix it. And there has been a drastic decrease, I should say,
Starting point is 00:44:34 in civic engagement and voter participation in black communities since 2012. This has just been the case. And my first organizing job, our organizing director said to us, there's no such thing as an apathetic voter, just a bad organizer. And that's something that's lived with me. I talk about this anytime I kick off a canvas,
Starting point is 00:44:54 anytime I talk to young organizers, and I do believe that that's true. I believe that there is a way into the hearts and minds of people. We just have to be willing to take the time to do it. And so, we're scaling up a program to contact black, brown, and working class voters.
Starting point is 00:45:16 We've been on doors since September, we crossed 100,000 door mark just last month. The thing about having been on those doors in September, we were able to take time. Like if people hadn't been fed all sort of misinformation, I like to say it's this information versus this information. That's how we're approaching these conversations on the doors and we have the time to do it.
Starting point is 00:45:42 So when people would push back, our organizers could say, well, this is not the case. We can talk about all the achievements of the Biden-Harris administration, the lower costs on prescription drugs. We can talk about how folks can save money with the Affordable Connectivity Program. Unfortunately, a funding has run out.
Starting point is 00:45:57 We need Congress to act. But we also talked about the Inflation Reduction Act, primarily, and how people can save money on their utility bills, how people can advance in more sustainable ways in living and upgrading their homes. And we had a pretty good response. We get pretty good responses, but at the same time,
Starting point is 00:46:14 there's a lot of work for us to do. People are frustrated, cost of living is still through the roof, we need to figure out a real answer to solve those people's issues. And if folks are filling it in their pocketbooks every single day, it's a very hard sell to get them to come out in November. But we're talking about what the alternative was,
Starting point is 00:46:35 because we don't have to say what a Trump presidency will be. People have experienced that we have four years of evidence. And we also have four years of evidence of the Biden-Harris administration we can compare it to and things are drastically better overall, but we need to connect that on a micro level. Fram, this is Frank Lloyd writes, Taliesin in Spring Green, Wisconsin.
Starting point is 00:47:02 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Taliesin. Taliesin. Talies whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Talesian, pow. Tally-esson. Tally-esson? OK. Too much seating. What are we doing with all these built-ins?
Starting point is 00:47:18 There's no flexibility, don't you think? It's, look at all these chairs. You have to sit against the wall, right? I think people just want to look outside. The chairs are facing in. Not the ones that are by the window. Those, I guess, okay. They're meant to be lounged on, not just sitting up straight.
Starting point is 00:47:40 I don't know. You know, they're for the ghosts. They say tele-essence is haunted. You think it's haunted? Yeah, I've't know. You know, they're for the ghost. They say tele-essence is haunted. You think it's haunted? Yeah, I've been there. What are you hearing during this campaign when you're knocking on doors, when you're trying to get people to turn out, especially when Wisconsin has not just a presidential race, but a Senate race, ballot measures, state house races, and congressional races?
Starting point is 00:48:02 Voters are actually quite apathetic at the doors, which scares the shit out of me because I think apathy is one of the biggest things that undermines democracy. But when you approach voters and, again, we're meeting them where they are and you're vulnerable with them and you may share, these are my fears and these are the things that I would like to see for my community and my family, Some people will say fuck off but other people actually
Starting point is 00:48:29 open up and I've heard on the doors and I think this is why we shouldn't underestimate voters. I'm hearing people talk about caregiving and why we have to increase wages for caregivers. I'm hearing people talk about, yes, absolutely, that is a huge issue. I heard Justin Mount Horne the other day, a woman tell me about public safety and specifically school safety and gun violence. And then I also ran into a couple of Trumpers who think Libs are controlling the weather. And we're not. Yeah, last I checked we're not. But again we have to keep meeting people where they are. We have to keep having conversations. I don't think we have to think of them as political conversations but more just of a lot of people miss
Starting point is 00:49:22 having connection and if you approach a door and you have a conversation and build a connection, I think more folks are willing to talk to you and also don't talk about the top of the ticket and they'll talk to you. Such an important point. Mandela, I'll now direct your attention to Frank Lloyd Wright's wing spread in Windpoint, Wisconsin. Apparently the roof is leaky as hell. A problem experienced in many of Frank Lloyd Wright's dumps. Do you know that he famously said if the roof doesn't leak
Starting point is 00:49:54 the architect hasn't been creative enough? What kind of maniac? Look at that. You want to live in that? Well the the thing is, like, it's designed to prevent leaks, but it just doesn't work. So you're blaming the construction people? No. It's a design flaw. I'm always with the... Hey, I am always with the proletariat. It's so fun to attack Frank Lloyd Wright.
Starting point is 00:50:22 I've never done it before. It's really fun. It's like funny. Yeah. It's like, it's one of those things, like you think you have a good idea, and in practice, it's just not. And this is it. Yeah, I agree with that.
Starting point is 00:50:34 Maybe this segment. We'll find out. All right. Fran. Yes. You were a chef? I was. Well, you can do it.
Starting point is 00:50:44 You're always a chef. You can't take that away. I think I'm more of a cook now. And I miss line cooking a lot. What is the difference between a chef and a cook? Ego. Right. No, I actually think that line cooking is very much
Starting point is 00:51:04 like building more of a democracy. And here's the thing, we, in order to have a good service, you have to have mise en place, right? You have to have all your ingredients ready. What was the term? Mise en place. Yeah. You know this.
Starting point is 00:51:18 Mandela pretends to cook and know that he's a chef. Wow. No, but it's like you have to have all your ingredients prep. And actually, more goes into the prep than what you may be preparing on the line for the dish. And so when I think actually about democracy and specifically what's happening here in Wisconsin, I really do think that we're doing that prep work.
Starting point is 00:51:41 We're building up that line to be able to create a really great dish, which, yes, this is corny, that's democracy, right? We've got folks on the doors, and it's not just volunteers. We've got elected officials on the doors. We've got folks who have never been door knocking before. We've got competitive maps now, and 97, yes. 97 out of 99 assembly districts have a Democrat running. That hasn't happened in years.
Starting point is 00:52:15 And then we've also got, I mean, people need to remember that we've been organizing for the last 12 years, right? I would say almost every person in a county in Wisconsin knows what gerrymandering is. That doesn't happen without coalitions like Fair Maps Wisconsin. Um, yes. And so we're building that coalition, and I think now it's much more multi-ethnic and multicultural,
Starting point is 00:52:40 and that's only gonna make our, like, the fate of democracy fucking runs through Wisconsin, right? And so we're, yes. And so we're building up all this prep, all of the ingredients to create a really great dish. And I think cooks are the best at that. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:58 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And if the meat sauce is done well, it doesn't matter who the chef at the top of the ticket is. Well, okay. That's some...
Starting point is 00:53:08 Hey. Okay. I like that. Because everyone knows what to do. It's all there. It's all planned. Yeah. It's all planned.
Starting point is 00:53:19 And hopefully planned better than the stately Robie house in Chicago. You know what's good for a house on the Great Plains in the winter of 1909? Floor to ceiling fucking windows. Sure, it looks chic as hell, but you know everyone is shivering their asses off, saying, oh, we love it, Frank. Beautiful on the outside, total mess on the inside.
Starting point is 00:53:40 Remind you of any podcast hosts you know? Care to comment? I feel like they just stole a bunch of stained glass windows from churches and we're like, we're gonna build this now. Yeah. Maybe that's what Frank did. You would have to have an Eric Huvdy mustache to want to own this place. Yeah, that's right. That's right. Take that Robie House in Chicago,
Starting point is 00:54:07 which I believe is near the campus of the University of Chicago and wasn't open the time I tried to go in. Anyway, Mandela. What are we going to do? No question. Forward Together. Yes. We're also working with Forward together. Oh man. Yeah. Nice. Oh, that's super fun.
Starting point is 00:54:30 We just here to plug all of his jobs and organizations right now? Well, do you want to do any more plug? This is supposed to be a softball. You can talk about whatever you want. We did a whole thing to, we queued you up for a great thing about how being a chef is like cooking democracy. And it was beautiful. Yeah, no, that was, I mean, I worked on that, let's be honest. No, I think it's important to talk about who's also vital, the communities that are vital to be able to win this election.
Starting point is 00:54:56 And I completely agree with Mandela that it is going to be black voters, specifically black women voters who are going to get us the win. And I think it's also important to think about the Asian American women who are leading in communities all across the state right now. I mean, Biden won by barely 20,000 votes in 2020. So it's these communities that are going to be the margin of victory to make sure that we have, that we fucking save democracy. So Mandel, one of the challenges that's really important and one of the challenges I think
Starting point is 00:55:34 you're both kind of getting at here is look, I think everybody here is going to do what they can, right? A lot of people listening are going to do what they can, but the people were trying to reach either people that didn't vote in the past or maybe voted for occasionally in the past, maybe voted for Biden and are feeling pretty disillusioned, the less engaged they are with the day-to-day coverage of the news, the more cynical they now are. That's true all age groups. That's true of a disengaged senior.
Starting point is 00:56:02 It's true of a disengaged NZ person. Cross-racial groups. The disengaged senior, true of a disengaged NZ person, cross-racial groups, right? The disengagement and cynicism are tied. And I'm just curious what your experience has been trying to reach those kinds of voters who basically are like I... That they're dissatisfied with their options, they don't feel the effects of politics,
Starting point is 00:56:20 they don't believe you when you tell them about the good that's been done. I mean, it's literally the hardest organizing work that I've ever been a part of. And black women have certainly been the backbone of a democratic party. And I will say about that too is we know that we can't take voters for granted. And that's what has been the problem. And because of that is where we see this slow chipping away of black male voters. And that's what's very troubling for me
Starting point is 00:56:48 because it's not even a policy conversation. You start talking about policy, it's like, okay, well, yeah, we are still with the party by a very large margin and still are even though some folks are chipping away, but it doesn't have to be anywhere near majority. It just needs to be a slim margin, as was mentioned, 21,000 votes is what Biden won by. And so when you get in conversation with somebody and just like, you know, nobody's been looking
Starting point is 00:57:18 out for me. Everybody's ignored me. And people feel like their very real grievances have just been pushed aside, it becomes almost impossible to ask somebody to vote. And the only way that it does become possible to get them to become a voter and hopefully vote for the right candidates is taking the time to learn and be that person who actually does listen. Because if you're not the person knocking on the door,
Starting point is 00:57:48 having the conversation, it will not have happened at all. And so that's why I encourage people to step out, get out there and volunteer. Because anybody who feels ignored, we should take that seriously. But who are the people who will actually listen? It's not like, unfortunately, it's not like their members of Congress are showing up
Starting point is 00:58:06 and knocking on doors. You just don't have the time to as a member. Occasionally you get your state legislators who show up your local office holders, but somebody who can actually take the time to hear people out, that's where we make up the difference. Sometimes it is really just being there. Being there to listen to somebody's story about
Starting point is 00:58:27 having lost a loved one to addiction, to gun violence, or even how their job just does not exist anymore. These things, they matter to people and they feel like they don't matter to anybody. In many ways, we are social workers in communities. We feel so many voice for folks who feel like, or who really have lost it all, but you could be that difference. You could be that person that gives somebody hope and inspiration and faith in a time
Starting point is 00:58:57 where it feels like there is none. So the answer is you all. The answer is anybody who's listening. The answer is anybody who has the time to get out there and act as if this democracy is worth saving. You! You! You!
Starting point is 00:59:11 You! You! You! You! You! You! You! You!
Starting point is 00:59:18 You! You! You! You! You! You! You! You! You! You! You! You! You! Frank Lloyd Wright only took two hours to sketch it, and we can tell. There's a waterfall in the middle of it.
Starting point is 00:59:28 You know what the original owner of Falling Water called it? Rising mildew. It's also structurally unsound. Fran, do people know about these two amendments that are on the ballot? They're an absolute power grab by the Republicans in the legislature in order to be able to undermine the powers of the executive and essentially continue to hoard power in the
Starting point is 00:59:54 legislature. And so please vote no to both and tell everyone that you know to vote no to both. There are yard signs you can pick up with the League of Conservation Voters. They've got phenomenal, I think they're like orange and blue and white yard signs that you can put up that say vote no. And remember that the Republican Party here in this state is not going to change. They will continue to try to hoard power, harm our communities, and I think we have to say it for what they are.
Starting point is 01:00:25 Yeah. I think Frank Lloyd Wright is probably a genius, you know? I think Frank Lloyd Wright is probably a genius. You know, I'm not really, I'm just kidding about it. If you really care about him, because he's like Wisconsin, I'm just kidding about it. I don't, no. He did come to, so Frank Lloyd Wright came to Los Angeles. I don't know when he leaves Wisconsin.
Starting point is 01:00:49 I haven't read the Wikipedia. But he does come to LA. And it's after a gruesome murder. And then he builds these mausoleums buildings around LA, these giant kind of dark, they're actually in the movie Blade Runner because they're a dystopian future building And they're inspired by like South American architectural
Starting point is 01:01:09 archaeological sites, okay, I Really don't think we're supposed to like this guy Hey, so it's like it's like the whole thing like we at some point we liked him and we don't it's like like Hulk Hogan You talked about Hulk Hogan now. I have to remind you like it did look kind of cool, but he's not the Hulk Hogan of our younger years. This isn't the person... This isn't the dude that told us to eat our vitamins. This is the Hulkster with a hard R. That's such an important point. And by the way, I didn't realize until this moment that part of the appeal that Hulk Hogan has to me is a sense memory from when he got me to take my vitamins. Because the nostalgia.
Starting point is 01:01:55 Because the wrestling was on either before or after American Gladiators. And I used to love American Gladiators. As did I. Because of the articles. And... This is how you door knock, by the way. You know, I door knocked today with Ben Wickler. You did.
Starting point is 01:02:15 I knocked on doors today at Madison. Thank you. I won. That's awesome. And, you know, first of all, it's amazing to watch him knock on doors. He's very, he's just, he's obviously the pro. But it was amazing knocking on doors in Madison, which is obviously a strong, very democratic area.
Starting point is 01:02:32 But so, so it really is more about just turnout and reminding people. But you knock on the door, somebody opens the door and they're like, yep, I'm about no on those. I've heard about that. We're going to, we're going to elect the whole slate. We're going to do this. They know the thing. They know that it was exciting. It was good. It's like they're getting the word out. So
Starting point is 01:02:46 we're really by the end, we're trying to sign up volunteers because people are keyed in, which is cool. I'm very proud of Madison and how engaged they've been. And I think the folks here who help us uphold the progressive values we really used to have in this state and we need to continue to build that. What is one thing that people get wrong with ramen? That you can be messy with it. You should. You should slurp.
Starting point is 01:03:22 You should get a bunch of shit on your shirts. This is the reason we had ramen bibs, especially for lunch regulars, because they had ties. So we gave them a ramen bib because it's not enough just to have a napkin on your neck, because that shit will bleed right through. You can wear it to your neck. You beat me to it. You beat me to it. You beat me to it. What, before we go, what is just for people listening that are not from Wisconsin, You beat me to it. You beat me to it. You beat me to it. Before we go, what is just for people listening that are not from Wisconsin, what's the most helpful thing they can do right now? You can help us get more money.
Starting point is 01:03:53 Make a donation to legislative candidates, especially assembly Democrats. You can do that at www.wisembleydemocrats.com and anyone. Each person, regardless of if they're for Wisconsin or not, if you have a small connection to Wisconsin, you are a trusted messenger to someone. So folks in this room may not be able to reach voters across Wisconsin, specifically more maybe in smaller communities. But again, if you're a trusted messenger, give them kind of the vision of what you want when we have a Wisconsin that works for everyone.
Starting point is 01:04:36 Yeah, and could not agree more and could support the work of Power to the Polls Wisconsin, power to the polls wi.org and the vital organizing work that's happening. We need you to help save Wisconsin in order to save democracy. All right. Framindale, thank you so much. They'll be back for the wheel. Thank you. That was great. Really appreciate it. We come back.
Starting point is 01:04:52 Thomas Lennon is here. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back! Comedy icon, please welcome to the stage, the one, the only, it's Thomas Lennon! He's running full speed. Full, full, yes! Okay, hi.
Starting point is 01:05:16 Hi. Thank you for being here. Come on. All right. That was exciting. You bounded out here. First, I want to apologize to the people that can see us in person for looking so much like Eric Hulve-D. Stop.
Starting point is 01:05:38 That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Hi. It's nice to see you. It's so good to see you. Hi. Do you know that we met once before? Where was that? That's pretty good. Hi, it's nice to see you. It's so good to see you, hi. Do you know that we met once before? Where was that?
Starting point is 01:05:48 It was a punch up. Oh shit. For a, Oh what? For a script. Something bad. Something bad. It was a movie that I think was ultimately called The Campaign.
Starting point is 01:05:59 Oh wait, wait, wait, wait. With Zach Galifianakis and Will Ferrell. Will Ferrell. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For I'd never been in a puncher before. Those are a horrible thing. They do these things when a movie is really just already tanking and they just are looking at it on paper.
Starting point is 01:06:14 It's such a scary thing. And then they get a bunch of people in a room, and they get a bunch of donuts and crullers and stuff. And then people throw out thousands of jokes. And it's just a r- and none of them are ever in the movie. They're never in the movie. It's just like you put hats on hats on hats on hats on hats. Cause the movies, the movies are already about to be made.
Starting point is 01:06:34 They can't change anything. It's like, well, you can't make it. You can't change too much. But they hate it. But they hate it. But they hate it so much. We got to change everything, but nothing. It has to be completely different,
Starting point is 01:06:44 but we have to shoot exactly what we've already written. We hate this so much. We hate it, we gotta change everything, but nothing. Yeah. It has to be completely different, but we have to shoot exactly what we've already written. We hate this so much, but we've already spent $70 million. And so you try to, so a lot of times what you'll end up, it's like, okay, when this person's head is facing away. ADR jokes. We'll have the actor come back in and write a joke that you can say from far away.
Starting point is 01:07:04 I've been asked to do some of those. Yeah, just the over the shoulder ADR stuff. And then you always put them in and it's never, someone just goes, Chariso! It's like, what? That wasn't, it's never part of the scene. You can always tell that the side of their face is not moving. What's the difference between me and Eric Holdy? I don't know, what's the difference?
Starting point is 01:07:22 I don't know either. Really good. What's the difference between me and Eric Holdyvde. I don't know, what's the difference? I don't know either. Really good. What's the difference between me and Eric Hulvde? I'm not sure, what? I have a Wisconsin driver's license. Whoa, nice. That was good.
Starting point is 01:07:35 Oh yeah, that was good. That was good. He got Lenin'd. What's that? Lenin'd. I got Lenin'd, yeah, you got Lenin'd. I got Lenin'd. Yeah, you got Lenin'd. You got Lenin'd.
Starting point is 01:07:47 I actually never really heard of him until I saw all the pictures up and I was like, oh, it's like looking in a mirror. Nah. I don't want to wish him well, but someone's going to have to play him in a shitty Lifetime movie at some point. Someone's going to have to, and it's going to be me or Andy Daly. Probably Andy. Two great options. Probably Andy. Well, two great options. It'll probably be Andy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:08:05 Great option. Honestly, we have great options. We have great options. We just got to talk about it. We'll think and think about it. We just got to talk about it. I'll let you know in a couple weeks. We're just going to have to go talk about it.
Starting point is 01:08:12 But we think you're amazing. Love it. I have tickets for Taliesin tomorrow at 11, 15 AM. Oh, really? Really? I'm going to Taliesin at 11, 15 AM tomorrow. Wow. At 11, 15.
Starting point is 01:08:23 That's great. And then you walk around and be like, oh, look at that. Look at that. There's a four hour tour. And I was like, I'm not doing that. I have a D.D. four hours. There's a four hour tour. And I was like, I'm not doing that. I don't care. We went to the Biltmore Castle. Sure. And in North Carolina. And there's a little hand they make you.
Starting point is 01:08:41 You can walk around with a who are the Biltmore? Is this the Biltmore? Some sort of robber barons. Yes, it's a... Yeah, yeah. The Carnegie's, Rockefellers. The Carnegie's? Vanderbilts.
Starting point is 01:08:50 Oh. It's the third one. Yes. But they give you a little thing where you can listen as you walk around. I'm not doing that. No, I'm not doing that. I'm not doing that. So you wrote a book called Writing Movies for Fun and Profit, How We Made a Billion Dollars
Starting point is 01:09:02 at the Box Office. I would like to point out on the actual title, the words fun and is crossed out. So it's actually writing movies for profit. Oh. That was a joke, but it's actually true. It literally is crossed out on the title page. That's funny.
Starting point is 01:09:17 It's funny enough. Because it was for profit. It was. We actually had fun though. Here's the thing. We were such dicks when we wrote that book called That, that we were like, now we can't take the money. So we actually gave all the money from the book to the USO.
Starting point is 01:09:32 Oh, that's nice. Well, it was just like, we made it, it's such an obnoxious title. You're like, you can't do that. And then be like, look, and then we got more money. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. It just seemed like a dick move.
Starting point is 01:09:44 Well, it's funny too, because the people that write books like How to Make a Million, the book is the way they're making the money. Of course. We actually had a chapter in the screenwriting book, but we took it out because it was so mean. And it was a chapter that listed all of the movies that had ever been released by all the people who had written other screenwriting books. And like, Robert McKee, who ended up becoming a person that I like a lot later, but like his only movie credit
Starting point is 01:10:13 is Barbie and the Dream Castle, which is a TV movie in the sort of mid 80s. Ah, but they were ahead of the curve on the Barbie thing. They really were. It almost caught fire. Yeah, so it was just interesting. We took some time to write it. How would you actually write movies if you really did it for a living all the time?
Starting point is 01:10:32 Had to deal with the studio system, which I think you know a little bit about. It can be very tough. Most of the movies they're making, they kind of hate already. So it's an interesting racket. What do you think about the studios and the threat of AI replacing joke writing? Yeah, you know, have you ever heard a really great AI joke yet? This is like a weird nuance. Like jokes are so jokes are very elusive thing. I mean, I think AI is going to do a lot of weird things.
Starting point is 01:11:04 It already shows you weird photos. Have you seen all the things that, like, everything, like, turns into something? Like, people are like, they sneeze, and then they turn into a pile of lumber, and then, like, spiders come out of there. Everything's just fucking weird. So I think it's going to be great at shit to look at when
Starting point is 01:11:18 you're on mushrooms for, like, a second. It's going to be great at, like, doing a visualizer for your iTunes screen But I don't know if it's gonna write really funny stuff In fact, I actually think that comedy might be a pretty safe thing from the robots for a while What a thing to say. I mean the robots that are hearing every word of it and using it When I was a boy, we were super worried about a Y2K happening, and we had one yesterday.
Starting point is 01:11:48 Yeah. We actually had one, and it was like sort of in the news. But we were all like, we were all like making love on mountains because we knew we were going to die. We're like the second it goes to midnight, we're all dead. Every plane's going to fall out of the sky. Remember that? We all thought that for sure.
Starting point is 01:12:07 I remember Y2K. Yeah, and then we had it yesterday and everybody's like, nah. They're like, oh we never come. You couldn't fly on Spirit? Is that the worst thing that ever happened to you? Yeah, I will say a lot of Republicans. Hey, hey, hey.
Starting point is 01:12:21 A lot of Republicans did get stuck in Milwaukee for several more hours. Milwaukee is a beautiful town. It's a beautiful town. It's a great, great town. Yeah, we did have a Y2K. I actually slept through the Y2K. When I woke up, the Y2K was already over.
Starting point is 01:12:35 Were you a little bit bummed? Well, it's really, wait, what's up? Oh my God, Y2K, come on, Y2K. And then it's like, you know how, okay, this is going to sound mean, but we're in the Midwest. You know how when you hear about a storm that's going to hit Florida sounds really scary? And you're like, oh, that sounds cool. But every time it gets to the shore, it's a category four storm. It's just like Y2K was that. We were like, oh my gosh, an airplane's going to fall out of the sky. really yeah your coffee maker messed up for a second for a second not even and
Starting point is 01:13:08 then people saying they're smart they're smart fridges where we're working it's like hey that was a stupid thing to buy why did you your fridge your fridge was fine when it was dumb as hell the only fridge improvement and thank you robot overlords is have you seen the fridge that the door is glass? Yeah. So you can see what that is. Okay. Yeah, it was smart to make the fridge glass door glass.
Starting point is 01:13:29 One for the robots on that one. One for the robots. Way to go. Point robots. You see that some of the CVSs have replaced the glass doors on the drink cabinets with a screen that displays what drinks are behind the cabinet? And then you go call someone and say, could you please help me get this drink out? And then they come over real mad about it.
Starting point is 01:13:44 And then they have to find a key. They got to find the key. But you don't need a screen because you had glass. Glass was nature's. Minus one robots. Minus one. We didn't need a TV here. We didn't need a TV on this side.
Starting point is 01:13:58 We had glass. We could have looked at the item. Yeah, it was nature's glass. Nature's glass is the computer screen. But it's not as cool. It's not as cool. They can't put ads on it. That's a digital powerade that represents an actual powerade.
Starting point is 01:14:13 There is a viral clip. There's a clip of you on TikTok that is everywhere all the time, 24-7 a day. Can we see, can we show the clip? Wait, what? I'm just goofing. New boot goofing. Oh!
Starting point is 01:14:28 And I think what's amazing about this clip, it's not just that people say New Boot goofing all the time. It's a cadence. It's a trip. People must be shouting at this to you all the time. It is. There's actually two beers called New Boot Goofing that I found out about. And I was like, hey, would you send me some? And they're like, yeah. And then they sent me like one. And I was like, I could say, why don't I send you a cease and desist? But no, they, they're all, they're lovely. They sent you one?
Starting point is 01:15:00 They sent me like a beer. It was so cute. But I'm from cable. I'm used to that kind of thing. Here's the other big bummer about the Lieutenant Dangle and the boots and everything is there is an official Lieutenant Dangle Halloween costume that like Comedy Central and Viacom that they sell. But it got a little bit popular and it was a little bit expensive. So Spirit Halloween makes a fake one that does way better. And it's called Sergeant Short Pants. And I don't know why I'm giving you a plug for the one. Sergeant Short Pants, they sell it.
Starting point is 01:15:41 It's like always next to like the inflatable, like dress up like a penis. That's an actual spirit Halloween also. You can kind of put them together if you wanted. Definitely. Definitely you'll see those guys together places. Yeah. Captain Penis and Sergeant Short Pants. Yep. Yep. By the way, that's not a terrible Comedy Central series for us to pitch right now.
Starting point is 01:16:06 Yeah. Captain Penis and Sergeant Shortfence. Sergeant Shortfence. Solving just old Sherlock Holmes mysteries that already exist. Oh, can I tell you something? Let AI write that one. What happens to the robots? Do they explode like Videodrome when you put Leprechaun in space and say put it in space? What does the AI do?
Starting point is 01:16:26 It blows up the mainframe Like that movie Millennium What's the movie Millennium remind me it would with that singer who died? Chris Christopherson and the airplanes this is sucks because I'm just finding out that Chris Christopherson And the airplanes. This sucks because I'm just finding out that Chris Christopherson died. I'm sorry to tell you this, but Chris, I hate to... I'm sorry. This is not the way you were supposed to hear.
Starting point is 01:16:50 I need a minute. This is not the way we wanted you to know that Chris Christopherson died. This is just not how we thought you'd find out. Chris Christopherson, if you don't send me flowers, you don't sing me love songs, you hardly talk to me anymore when I come through the door is dead. Yeah, that one. Are we sure? Honestly, no. Yeah, that one. Are we sure?
Starting point is 01:17:05 Honestly, no. No. He may be alive. I think he's fine. No, because wait, if Chris Christopherson is... Chris Christopherson is my Schrodinger's cat. Is Chris Christoph... I believe that he is alive and fine.
Starting point is 01:17:20 Well, that's... And he's an ass pin or some bullshit. He's alive! Chris Christopherson's alive Hold on hold on somebody look Then who died No, who's fine and he's the only person who ever stood up for Sinead O'Connor, but person who ever stood up for Sinead O'Connor. But...
Starting point is 01:17:44 Okay, now I'm freaking out. Because that's part of the thing of the person who died. Get him on the phone. Get him on the phone. I can probably get him on the phone. What do you mean right here? You're just pointing at your phone. We all have Chris Christopherson in our phone.
Starting point is 01:18:00 Who's star of the movie Millennial? Millennium. What is this movie? I don't, I think you're having the Mandela Barnes effect. Come on, come on. All right. Do you know, by the way, so the house I grew up in is three blocks on the exact same street as the Frank Lloyd Wright home and studio. Oh, interesting.
Starting point is 01:18:24 Yeah. Don't clap for that. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Don't clap for that. Don't clap for that. He's a super weird dude. He's a weird guy. We don't know anything. After his third wife, he started dating a sophomore at Madison. I didn't do it.
Starting point is 01:18:39 I'm bringing you the news. Yeah, it sucks. He's bringing us the news. It sucks. Have you heard the good news? Chris Christopherson is risen. Now, shit, we're going to have to check the news. He's bringing us the news. It sucks. Have you heard the good news? Chris Kristofferson has risen. Now, shit, we're going to have to check the news every... When does this come out?
Starting point is 01:18:50 It comes out tomorrow, I believe. And so he makes it through the night. I'm like, my mind is fucking blown because I saw Chris Kristofferson, the star of the film Millennium, which doesn't exist. What the fuck is the film? There is no film Millennium. It does exist. It was him, but he didn't die.
Starting point is 01:19:12 Then who died? Who was the- Love it, what happens in the film Millennium? In the film Millennium, aliens, sorry, in the film Millennium, people in the future and their magical computers send people back in time to take human beings off planes that were about to crash anyway, to bring them to the future to reproduce because they can't reproduce in the future.
Starting point is 01:19:30 Then they put fake corpses onto the planes that were going to crash anyway so they don't change the past, and they crash those planes. And investigator Chris Christopherson starts to find their future technology and begins to piece together the fact that humans from the future are sending fake dead bodies back in time to steal the real live bodies to make new people in the broken dystopian future of millennium. It's genuinely a better idea than I've ever had. It's a really good idea.
Starting point is 01:20:03 It's also a little bit like Scientology. Yeah. As every kind of like the Cliff Notes. It's a little bit like the Cliff Notes. What good idea isn't a little bit like Scientology? So now you are an incredible writer who has written on so many projects. I'm a busy writer.
Starting point is 01:20:20 You're very busy. So it's time we play a twist on a love really classic called Did I Write This? We're going to have Chris out there. Chris is over there. I thought you were going to use the Urkel, like, Did I write this? That's better. That's a good pitch, but you weren't here. You didn't pitch that till now.
Starting point is 01:20:40 All right. If somebody would like to, let's, somebody raise your hand. You want to answer a question? Was I the pen behind, and I'm going to say her name properly, the Lindsay Lohan vehicle, Herbie Fully Loaded? Yes, correct. Got it. Correct. So you talk about, in the book, about making this movie. What is your takeaway now all these years later? Couple of things. Lindsay Lohan is, she's excellent in the film. The film actually did really well. And everyone just hated us so much when that movie came out.
Starting point is 01:21:15 The reason, oh, it's in the actual poster right now. We actually got fired, even though I'm in the movie at some point, we got fired off of writing the film. Because the studio producer, after something happened, was like, and then Herbie's gonna smile. And we were like, Herbie's not fucking like liquid metal. He's not the T1, his lights go on and off,
Starting point is 01:21:40 his trunk opens, he goes beep beep, but he's not like, he's not gonna go, like fucking smile, like the Joker, that's insane. That's crazy. If the car smiles at Lindsay Lohan, she's gonna go, that's crazy. This is a sentient, like insane thing. So that was the hill that we died on and then we... So for some reason, we were perfectly happy to write a Herbie Fully Loaded movie, but gonna be dicks about that the car couldn't smile. Which was such an awesome idea. No, and that's-
Starting point is 01:22:10 And they really got us on the poster. Right, because the car does seem to smile. He has just got a shit-eating grin on his face. He's almost saying, hi Tom. So Herbie is a sentient vehicle. Herbie, yeah, Herbie. This was actually, I think, probably something like the sixth Herbie movie, something like that.
Starting point is 01:22:32 Wow. Yeah. And this, oh, yeah. It was an interesting time to write that picture, for sure. So did Thomas write Weird, the Al Yankovic story? No. That's correct. Correct. So, did Thomas write Weird, the Al Yankovic story? No. That's correct. Correct.
Starting point is 01:22:50 Okay, I wrote, did I write Reno 911, The Hunt for QAnon? This feels like a trick. It's distressing how many of you have not seen that that's a real movie. I'm a big fan. I just found out about this. Okay, that's really fucking distressing. This is a giant movie that came out on Paramount Plus. I thought it was a giant movie.
Starting point is 01:23:20 I'm sorry. The answer was yeah. I'm gonna go with yes. Well, yeah, obviously. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. One of my smarty pants friends pointed out, they're like, shouldn't it really be called
Starting point is 01:23:31 Reno 911 The Hunt for Q? And I was like, yeah, but they already told us what the title was. That's right, because Q and non is everywhere. And plus, like, we didn't make Herbie smile. I'm like, I'm not going to fucking do this again. They told us what the title was. Shut up and do it sometimes.
Starting point is 01:23:52 The answer to who Q is in that movie is RuPaul and a speaking spell. That's cool. That's as good a guess as any. As good a guess as any. I started to spoil it. Please watch it. It's on Paramount+.
Starting point is 01:24:04 I will. I'll watch it. Yeah, it'd be good if they just any. I already spoiled it. Please watch it. It's on Paramount Plus. I will. I'll watch it. Yeah, it'd be good if they just hit play and left the room. Sign up for Paramount Plus and just leave me on. Yeah. Next question. Did Thomas Wright the pacifier starring one Vin Diesel? I hope so.
Starting point is 01:24:19 Yes. In the book, you said you met with Jackie Chan to potentially star in the past before Vin signed on. It was 100% just supposed to be a Jackie Chan movie. One thing is in the original draft written for Jackie, pitched to Jackie. Jackie loved the idea. He said script very good. After we pitched it, he did some kung fu at lunch.
Starting point is 01:24:42 It was really one of the coolest days of my life. And the idea was that he goes to a really great Chinese market, and he's going to make a duck for the children. And so the children freak out, and of course then he becomes friends with the duck. And he has sort of a scene where the duck is like his razakul, and he kind of talks to the duck a little bit. And they become friends, and the duck, of course, is a
Starting point is 01:25:04 popular character. So when Jackie ended up, they didn't want to do the movie with Jackie for a minute because the tuxedo had just kind of, in Hollywood you can cool off like in a millisecond and then you're hot and then you're freezing cold and you're hot. It's gaslighting all the time. So Jackie was no longer going to be in the movie, it was Vin Diesel. And I was like, well, let me go do a pass because we obviously have to cut the duck,
Starting point is 01:25:30 that doesn't make sense. And they're like, no. The only thing in the movie that for sure stays is the duck. Like, but why? And they're like, because he has a duck. I'm like, that, how? Fucking poster. I'm always wrong.
Starting point is 01:25:50 Look at the fucking poster. Every hill I die on is in the poster going like that. Ducks and smiling beetles. Did they make the car smile? I guess so. They did make the car smile. Passfire was sort of oddly a big hit. Yeah, I get it.
Starting point is 01:26:08 So was Herbie, by the way, even though it's a weird movie. Well, because it's about a sentient car that has no rights. We did. We made a huge mistake, which was at the premiere of Herbie Fully Loaded at the El Capitan in Hollywood. We talked to Nina Jacobson, who was the president of Disney, about what the sequel was going to be. Don't ever do that. Don't ever do that.
Starting point is 01:26:33 Don't ever go to the bar and be like, woo hoo, what's the next one? Herbie is going to get into that. Don't do that. Don't ever talk about what the next Herbie movie is going to be. You're at the El Capitan with Nina Jacobson, the former head of the studio. Don't bring up the what the next Herbie movie is going to be. You're at the El Capitan with Nina Jacobson, the former head of the studio. Don't bring up the sequel for Herbie.
Starting point is 01:26:49 We all talk about it, high five in early, don't do it. It's a curse. That's the curse, famously. The curse of talking about the movie too much. Did Thomas write for Comedy Central's legendary comedy series Strangers with Candy? I'm a contrarian, no. Incorrect. Come on. That was an interesting one because, so Stephen Colbert was a head writer of Strangers with Candy, who has also played one of the main characters. There they are. It's most of Exit 57, it's Amy and Paul and everybody. But really almost nobody else wrote Strangers with Candy episodes.
Starting point is 01:27:26 I don't know why they really let me write one, but I wrote the one where Jerry had traded away. She'd had a child years ago that she traded for a guitar. And then this new boy comes to school and it seems like this might be the boy that she traded for. So she goes to the Sadie Hawkins dance with what might be her son. And it's like very romantic and she gives a long speech about how she always wondered what happened to that guitar. It was a good episode. Stephen Colbert is a tough, tough guy to work for on that show. Tough. He's very, very, um, he's very hands on writing. Really? Yeah, yeah. Very. He's smart. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:06 He's so funny. It gets a little, it's, yeah. Sometimes it feels like, yeah, intense. I like that. I mean, we're friends, but it's also, it feels, you know, it's like, definitely like the stakes are high. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:17 You don't want to let him down. Yeah. We've gone on the Late Show with, and it's, you know, the people you meet and they're just like, I don't know, I'm pretty, I'm pretty inured to it at this point, but I am so nervous. Oh no, that one is particularly, yes, yes. You can just see it, he's so smart, he's so funny.
Starting point is 01:28:38 Yes. He has such a, there's also just like a righteousness to him, like an integrity to how he does things. Yes. But it's just, you really, I really want, I wanted to do for him what he wants me to do. Exactly. It's not that I want his approval, I want to succeed in the way he hopes to succeed.
Starting point is 01:28:52 Oh, I want his approval very much. And I also want the approval. I want his approval. 100%. One time he told me that I looked handsome and it was the first time I was happy in, I don't know, 35, 40 years. But you know, that was just, it felt good. Yeah. I think you're handsome.
Starting point is 01:29:06 Oh thanks very much. I look a little bit like Eric Hulvde. Yeah but but but not in any way that matters. You know? Come on. You put you put. That's a great stranger with candy also on Paramount Plus. Please go to Paramount Plus everybody. And if you take anything away from this. Just put it on. Just put a thumb on it. Thomas Lennon, thank you so much for being here. Oh my god, love it. When we come back, you've won the game, sir. You can stick around, because we're going to do the wheel.
Starting point is 01:29:34 When we come back, it's Nacho Average Wheel. And we're back. And we're back. Before we get to the wheel, journalist Erin Haynes has interviewed vice president Kamala Harris more times than any other journalists and on hysteria last week, she joined Alyssa to discuss building the media narrative around the vice president in light of recent calls for Biden to step down. Erin was also a great guest on pod save America this week. So please check out that episode on Amazon Music
Starting point is 01:30:07 or wherever you get your pods hysteria. This just in, Chris Christopherson has died. There were too many ads in that break. Somewhere between the mattress ad and the vitamins. He succumbs to a stampede at Copa America. All right. Let's bring out the extra chairs. And let's bring Victoria and Mandela and Fran.
Starting point is 01:30:36 Can you come back out? Come on out. Thank you. Sit wherever you want. There's no rules. Come around this way. We've got so many chairs now. Here, I'll sit here.
Starting point is 01:30:52 I'll sit on the edge. Believe it or not, I'm the far left tonight. Oh, there he goes. There he goes. We've done a lot of ranting. There's a lot to rant about. But you know what? We're going to take a break from ranting. All right? We need to be lot of ranting. There's a lot to rant about, but you know what? We're gonna take a break from ranting, all right?
Starting point is 01:31:05 We need to be replenished with cheese. Which is why we're closing out the show with a spin of the cheese wheel. We'll spin the wheel of chees- Nope, nope, that was too quick. President Biden. Each of us will share something cheesy that we love. That was too much.
Starting point is 01:31:30 Let's spin the wheel. Victoria, you're up first. What's something cheesy you love? That's wild. Like cheesy, like in a fun way, not pizza. It can be pizza. It can be actual cheese. It can be just anything that could be defined as cheesy.
Starting point is 01:31:51 Express your love for it. That's all it takes. That's fair. I don't know if fan fiction is cheesy. I feel like it's just... It's cheesy. That, and like I said earlier, I love crafts. You know, I can't keep saying it.
Starting point is 01:32:11 I can't be like Sean Hannity and use the same jokes. But I, the last time I was on your podcast, I said I love miniatures. So miniatures are the thing that I love the most. I think I'm a serial killer, but we don't know yet. We don't know yet. Great. I thought that was it, right?
Starting point is 01:32:29 I was like, this way? I was like, we were done. I was posing. No, I know how the show works. I know how to do it. Mandela, you're up. What is something cheesy that you love? You have 60 seconds.
Starting point is 01:32:43 Well, according to you, turtlenecks. But I will I will I will say one thing, though, if I'm at an event, I could be at a bar, I could be at a rally even. And if there's like a slip of the vibe, I will start playing Words with Friends. Like I have played Words with Friends consistently since like 2010. I play with donors. I play with random elderly people. Doesn't matter. Words with Friends consistently since 2010. I play with donors. I play with random elderly people.
Starting point is 01:33:06 It doesn't matter. Words with Friends, I play it. It's a part of my routine. I do the New York Times many. I do connections. And then I just fall into Words with Friends. What I think is great is when somebody talks about how they find out that years later their ex-boyfriend has been
Starting point is 01:33:23 playing Words with Friends with their father, kind of surreptitiously, for a really long time. I could be that guy. I like that. He really will be that guy. I like that. Yeah. Let's spin it again.
Starting point is 01:33:34 Cheese, friend. Cheese, friend. Cheese, friend. Cheese, friend. Cheese, friend. Cheese, friend. Woo! Ding, ding, ding. I'll just say that I like a romantic comedy where two people don't like each other and
Starting point is 01:33:55 then they realize they're in love with each other. I like it every time. Enemies to lovers. It's not broke. We don't need to fix it. I like it every time. Hey, love it, could I just pitch one of those as how to lose a guy in 10 days on Paramount+.
Starting point is 01:34:16 Please give it a like, please give it a like. Just let it run and give it a like. Just let it run. While I'm in and then I don't fucking care after that. I also like romantic comedy where they like each other in the first scene. Those are also good. Notting Hill's very good.
Starting point is 01:34:37 There are a lot of them. Oh, so many. You know what one I didn't care for? The Holiday. Wow, it's a divider. Why don't you like that one? Why don't I like the holiday? Because very early in the film,
Starting point is 01:34:51 Cameron Diaz says the word chutzpah. Mm-hmm. And Nancy Meyers, a maestro, lost me. Because Cameron Diaz can pull off a lot. She can pull off funny. She can pull off serious. She cannot pull off Jewish. I think she was just trying to pull off
Starting point is 01:35:14 cultural appropriation. You know what, that's really good for her. That's just advancing to her full white woman. Fair enough, Fair enough. All right, let's spin it again. ["The Last Supper"] Thomas, it's landed on you. So in terms of actual cheese, I'm
Starting point is 01:35:41 worried this answer is going to make me seem out of touch. Oh, this is going to be good. We have probably two or three different fondue machines. And for sure, but here's why. The sterno kind of fondue machine doesn't work at high altitude. This is, I knew you were gonna say I was out of touch. I knew you snowflakes were gonna say he's out of touch because he's got a special fondue machine for high altitude. Well I do. And it plugs in because the Sterno will go out because the air gets so thin. And then I've got a couple different kinds of Rock-Plet machines we can get.
Starting point is 01:36:28 We'll get into it. I feel like I've lost the people on this one. Do you have fondue parties? No, no, no. Fondue is like cheese abuse. Fondue is a big thing again. I'm going to seem out of touch. But what a lot of people forget when they make fondue is Kirschwasser.
Starting point is 01:36:45 Um. I mean. Yeah. The other thing they forget to do is rub the garlic on the inside of the bowl. And then just throw the garlic away. You don't want it. It's like a, yeah.
Starting point is 01:36:59 How often are you firing up this fondue machine? A lot. A lot. A lot. I'm on a pretty heavy duty cholesterol med that I won't plug. But when you know how much Kirschwasser you need and when you have a high altitude fondue machine, you've got to be on some pretty good cholesterol meds. And that's, and by the way, that's so important. So important.
Starting point is 01:37:24 And not enough people are talking about it. And so we're getting the word out. We're getting the word out. We're getting the word out. I didn't know that I was depressed for a decade. That's crazy. Until. Until.
Starting point is 01:37:44 You're right. You're right. You're right. Until we turned on one of those, it was a machine, I guess it was a chocolate fondue machine. Yeah, the same machine, but yeah, different. But this was chocolate. And there's a photo, and there's a photo of the moment the chocolate crested over the top in which there's a photo of me,
Starting point is 01:38:05 and for the first time, maybe in my adult life, I'm experiencing sort of unalloyed joy. And it was after that that I thought, oh my God, that's what it means to be happy. I need to figure out what I've been doing wrong that it took until the chocolate crested over the upper thing for me to experience joy like a normal person.
Starting point is 01:38:28 I gotta talk to somebody. I gotta get on something. I gotta fix this. I'm gonna be the thief of your joy. If it bubbled over the top, that's a chocolate fountain. Um. Um. So.
Starting point is 01:38:40 Wow. That's what it was. I just wanna clarify. He, he used your internet. Most of the audience at home is screaming, he's describing a chocolate fountain. And I just don't want to be part of, if we don't agree on with the truth,
Starting point is 01:38:54 we seem crazy. You know? No. So, we just have to agree on some facts. First of all, Thomas Lennon, I mean this, thank you for holding me accountable. Let's spin it again. It was a chocolate fountain.
Starting point is 01:39:10 You're right. Being crazy. ["CHEESE CURDS"] Fran, you're up. What is something cheesy that you love? Well, I love cheese curds. Cedar Grove. Cedar Grove, room temperature, absolutely
Starting point is 01:39:30 can't have it any other way. And if anyone here likes Culver's cheese curds, I don't think we can ever be friends. No! And then a not. Victoria, did you have a comment on Culver's? No, I didn't. Everybody tried to back away.
Starting point is 01:39:47 I didn't eat those on the drive over. I definitely. Just celebrated 40 years. Yeah, great Wisconsin company. I was there today. Doing great. I ate the cheese curds today and I know you're right. I know you're right, I know you're right.
Starting point is 01:39:58 They're bad, they're road curd at best. I have a whole Twitter thread on this. And if you're depressed, like road curd, you know, Culver's in the little, like, where you put, in the cup holder. That's where you put Culver's cheese curds when you're on the road and they're cold and you're just sad.
Starting point is 01:40:17 I mean, you have to call me out. I mean, you have to call me out. I wanna say the sadness has nothing to do with the cheese, so I want you to know that. Even the worst cheese helps. Heard. In my cheese journey, the best cheese curds come from places that have no more than one location. Cedar Grove.
Starting point is 01:40:39 But I also really like boy bands or did like the boy bands like O-Town and Hanson and 90 Degrees. Thank you. I remember them. Yeah. O-Town. I know. The O is for Orlando. It's the O is for Orlando.
Starting point is 01:40:56 It is. Seriously? Yep. I never knew that. You didn't know that? Wait, what did you think it was? I don't know. I thought it was like, oh, oh.
Starting point is 01:41:07 I just always, I always thought no one calls Orlando O-Town. And then these guys had the chutzpah. That's chutzpah. That's, that's chutzpah. That's chutzpah. She... Cameron Diaz says chutzpah the way Tommy Vitor says chutzpah. Which is like they're visiting a place and trying something. Ooh, should we try the chutzpah?
Starting point is 01:41:32 The chutzpah. I like, here's the thing, a bad day at Cheese Curds is better than a good day at work is what I would just say. You know what I'm saying? I had cheese curds yesterday, or two days ago, or maybe a month ago. I don't know. I'm in sort of a cheese haze. But they were dusted with powdered sugar, and we dipped them in maple syrup.
Starting point is 01:41:55 That's right. Get the fuck out of here. Stop. Sit down. Never. That's right. That's right. Was it at the RNC?
Starting point is 01:42:02 What? No, we were in Milwaukee. We were in Milwaukee, but it was a local establishment. It was, it was. And there was a pride flag, which tells me that these are woke cheese curds. Yeah! It's the first time I've ever agreed
Starting point is 01:42:16 with how they talk about the word woke. Yeah. Yeah. Because that's not elevated. I was... I want you to know that. Okay, well, you know what? Because that's not elevated. I want you to know that. Okay, well, you know what? I ate every goddamn one of them.
Starting point is 01:42:31 And that's the cheese wheel. We come back. We'll end on a high note. And we're back! All right, what's your name and what's your high note? My name is Michael and my high note is I'm here with my best friends Jamie and Rosie and in October I get to marry them together. That's awesome.
Starting point is 01:43:06 I officiated a wedding once. It was for a gay couple. We secretly did it at the White House. And then we did the ceremony later, and they were both Eagle Scouts. And I said, they have so much in common, they're like brothers with benefits. Yeah, that's how it went.
Starting point is 01:43:31 What's your name? What's your high note? Hi, I'm Amy. And my high note is that I'm the deputy city clerk where I work. And I just wanted to shout out Cami, my city clerk, because she's amazing and we get to facilitate democracy and I love it every day. So.
Starting point is 01:43:44 Thank you. Thank you for doing that. Hi, what's your name? What's your high note? Hi, I'm Jeremiah. I was here a year ago when you were here, and I was sharing with you my high note that I was about to marry my fiancé, and we're here now. We've been married for a year. I am happier and happier every day,
Starting point is 01:44:03 and we are now expecting our first baby. And... Um... Um... Um... How? My wife is having a hard time, but I'm, all of us here can support her
Starting point is 01:44:14 and I just love her so much. And I need her to know how much I care for her and how lucky I am to get to love her and to be a better partner and a better to be father. Every day. That's so sweet. A child conceived at last year's episode of Love It or Leave It.
Starting point is 01:44:30 Incredible. Beautiful. Thanks to everybody who shared. I know tonight, if you want to send us a message about something that gave you hope, you can send us a voice memo. And that is our show. Thank you so much to Victoria Vincent, Mandela Barnes,
Starting point is 01:44:46 Fran Hong, and Thomas Lennon. There are 24 days until the Democratic National Convention. There are 106 days until the 2024 elections. Have a great night and have a great weekend. And thank you to the Barrymore. Thank you, Wisconsin. Love It or Leave It is a crooked media production. It is written and produced by me, John Lovett and Lee Eisenberg. Kendra James is our executive producer.
Starting point is 01:45:20 Chris Lord is our producer. And Kennedy Hill is our associate producer. Hallie Kiefer is our head writer. Sarah Lazarus and Jocelyn Kaufman, Peter Miller, Alan Pierre, Will Miles and Mohana Del Chiqui are our writers. Evan Sutton is our editor, Kyle Seglin and Charlotte Landis provide audio support, Stephen Colon is our audio engineer and Milo Kim is our videographer. Our theme song is written and performed by Sure Sure. Thanks to our designer Bernardo Serna for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast. And to our digital producers, David Tolles, Claudia Sheng, Mia Kelman, and Matt DeGroote for filming and editing video each week so you can. It's love it or leave it.

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