Lovett or Leave It - Biden's VP Pick ACTUALLY Revealed!

Episode Date: August 15, 2020

Big episode! Kamala Harris makes history. Trump issues BS executive orders. And people lose their minds over a song about heterosexual goings on of some sort. Sasheer Zamata is here for the monologue. Alyssa Mastromonaco talks about the VP roll out. Ben Rhodes walks us through a week of big developments in foreign policy. And we quiz a listener (and math PhD!) on the different economic stimulus plans. Oh and fine I'm SORRY about last week's title, I guess.

Welcome to the 23rd episode of Love It or Leave It, back in the closet. Bye. He believes in science. His divinity was told. And now he's back. Back in the closet. He's stuck there in his room. Attempting his jokes over to. He's back. In the closet. Eating all the ground and snack. He caught and killed that genie.

Back, back, back, back. That song was sent in by Levi Phillips. And Levi, you've outdone yourself. I played the song and then I said, Ronan, you have to hear this. And he said, I heard it in a way that said, it's good, but don't play the song about yourself again, please. We want to use a new song each week, so if you want to make one, you can send it to us. We have a new address just for Love It or Leave It because we were getting a lot of incoming at that other address.

So send us an email with your song at leaveit, at crooked.com, L-E-A-V-E-I-T, at crooked.com, leaveit at crooked.com. That's our new address just for the show. You can send a song. You can send an idea, any thoughts you have really generally, complaints about other things that aren't the show, whatever you want. Also, the DNC, the Democratic National Convention, starts this Monday, and you can watch every night live with us at cricket.com slash convention. You can watch the convention live.

We will do it with commentary from me, John, Dan, Tommy, and some of our pals in the group thread. In the past, I know that sometimes group thread we haven't been able to show you, say, a debate because of copyright and stuff, but we have the feed now so you can watch live with us the speeches, the

floor. There's no floor, but you know, you can watch the convention with us, which will be great. And before the final night on Thursday before Joe Biden us the speeches, the floor. There's no floor, but you know, you can watch the convention with us, which will be great. And before the final night on Thursday, before Joe Biden accepts the nomination, we'll be doing a live Pod Save America convention pre-show starting at 5 p.m. Pacific, 8 p.m. Eastern at crooked.com slash convention. That's where all that will be. All right. Later in the show, we'll be joined by Alyssa Mastromonaco to talk about the VP selection

and Ben Rhodes joins to break down a big week in foreign policy and to talk about his new podcast. But first, she is a co-host of the podcast Best Friends. And you can watch her stand up special Pizza Mind on Amazon Prime, Stars on Demand and listen on iTunes and Spotify. A lot of platforms. Welcome back. All those platforms. So cheers, Ameda. Hello. So those platforms. So cheers, Amedda. Hello. So many platforms. If you have a platform, you can consume my content. I just want you to know that I have been really enjoying,

I've been going back to old episodes of Best Friends because it's nice to listening to people just live their lives having no idea what's coming. Oh my gosh just the pre virus just like, you know, let's go to a restaurant. Oh, we were in Europe. There's just no I know we did an episode with Mateo Lane in Canada for it was like a live just for last performance. And we were like making fun of Naomi Campbell for how much she prepares for a flight. Like, she's wearing gloves and goggles, like a hazmat suit. She's spraying everything down. How crazy. And then fast forward, really just a few months, and then everyone else is doing the same thing. Look, you don't get diamonds from Charles Taylor by not taking care of shit and making sure you're safe. You know what I mean? You got to get those

diamonds. Yes. You got to make sure you're safe. All right. Well, Sashira has graciously agreed to join for the monologue where I will tell some jokes and she can like them, hate them, comment on them, ignore them, many options. We'll see. So let's get into it. What a week. Let's start off with the big one. No, not the massive earthquake that I lay awake expecting to happen every night now that the San Andreas Fault is like, hey, remember me? I don't care how bad it is. I can do whatever I want whenever I want. No, that's like a pre-joke sentence. Now Joe Biden, it's like not even, there's nowhere to even comment. It's just a thought exercise. Semicolon and then separate. son. Semicolon and then separate. Here's a separate thing. No. Joe Biden made the biggest decision of the presidential campaign when he selected Senator Kamala Harris to be his running

mate. Kamala Harris becomes the first black woman and the first Indian American to be on a major party ticket. It's historic, said Gretchen Whitmer, before she faded like Michael J. Fox in that Back to the Future photo. Oh, man. It does need to be said, but it's just so funny to be like, can you believe the first? And it's like, oh, duh. Like, I don't, of course.

Yes. I honestly thought she was the first. Or like, I guess we've had women. I can't believe there's only been three, four? Well, there have been, right, three VPs, four if you include Hillary Clinton at the top of the ticket. Yeah. So there's been four women on a major ticket. include Hillary Clinton at the top of the ticket. Yeah. So there's been four women on a major ticket.

It's so crazy. There's been so many presidents. So many. And some of them have been so bad. So bad. Yeah. We've had really, really bad men. Yeah. Terrible.

And you can't get just some women? Yeah. We've been giving everybody a multiple choice test between two men every four years. And they've gotten it wrong about half the time, at least. Obviously, this is a monumental moment in American history and an important moment for the Biden campaign. Kamala not only brings energy and enthusiasm to the ticket, but she also will be available to apologize on behalf of Joe Biden at a moment's notice. And, you know, women are great at that.

Apologizing? Notoriously. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kamala is a strong pick for a few reasons. She fought the big banks during the mortgage crisis. She joined Bernie Sanders and Ed Markey to introduce the Monthly Economic Crisis Support Act, which will provide $2,000 a month to every American for the entirety of the pandemic.

She has fought for free masks and tests for every American. And she has a husband named Doug. Thank God. That's what we need. Doug, look, Doug is going to go through a sex symbol phase. All right. You think so? Absolutely.

Absolutely. Absolutely. I think the first week of September, right before Labor Day, there's a little bit of a lull. How's Twitter going to fill it? It's going to have the hots for Kamala Harris's husband, Doug. Doug. Have you met a Doug in real life?

Have I met a Doug? I've met this Doug. Oh. Okay. That's one. That's one. And I could barely keep my hands off of him. Dirty Doug. Oh, okay. That's one. And I could barely keep my hands off of it. Dirty Doug. I was like,

get me out of here. I can't be in the same room with this Doug. I'm freaking. I guess I haven't really thought about Doug that much. I gotta, I gotta go relook at some pictures. I definitely saw that video of him dancing at a parade or something like that. And I was like, okay. She picks someone with some rhythm. That's good. The Trump campaign seems at a loss for how to attack Kamala, announcing that she is not only a radical leftist,

but also too centrist, a corporate cop who moonlights for Antifa. They had months to work on this. It's as if they had a weekly show and they waited up until seconds before it began to work on the jokes, which I think is great. Are you talking about your show? I might be talking about this. Can you tell that some of these may have been finessed moments ago?

I can tell. Yeah, I can tell. I still can't believe you started with the earthquake and then pivoted to a hard pivot to Biden. Not even an easy shift. Just like, oh, here's a separate subject. No, just definitely. Yeah, just put up a sign. This is a dangerous curve. Trucks do not often make it. It's very dangerous. It was a really hard turn. often make it it's it's very it was a really hard turn uh meanwhile marjorie taylor green a q anon supporter won her gop primary runoff in georgia and will most likely be elected to the house of representatives it seems like she probably couldn't have won such a high profile race however

without at least some support from the globalist child sex ring led by living jf Jr. Oh, this is a QAnon? Mm-hmm. Okay. I feel like the twist there is, oh, she was actually supported by a living JFK Jr. I had to really fight for living JFK Jr. There's just a lot packed into that one punchline, I guess. Is that a punchline? If you could call it that. If you could call it that.

If it's any consolation, this was a Republican primary in Georgia, so it's not like the alternative was great. She wasn't running against Mitt Romney. Her opponent was like, stop talking about Pizzagate. We got to focus on making sure no one tears down this statue

of an enslaved person giving Robert E. Lee a thumbs up. See, now that's, it is a joke, but it just makes me sad. Like, because it's like very real. It's pretty dark. Here's the thing. I've become so desensitized. Like the world exists in a tiny box and I can just put different windows.

Sometimes I can put a Golden Girls window up. Yeah. Sometimes a virus. Sometimes racist protesters. Sometimes we'll throw on a season two episode of Seinfeld just to see what's going on there. Yeah. And I will just tell you that yesterday, Ronan referred to early seasons Jerry Seinfeld as Twink Seinfeld. And I can't get it out of my mind. I mean, yeah, that was a very svelte, spry Seinfeld. And as a kid, he was an older person. But now I realize he was younger than me in those episodes. So that's a journey I'm on. How old was he? Like early mid 30s. Oh, wow. So that's something I'm experiencing.

You know, sunrise, sunset. Oh, good for him. Kind of a deal. Yeah. I'll keep going. that. Oh, good for him. Kind of a deal. Yeah. I'll keep going. This week, Donald Trump doubled down on his assault on the post office, admitting he's doing it to stop votes from being counted. This happened the same day it was announced that the Postal Service would be shutting off mail sorting machines ahead of the election. And then right before we recorded, news broke that Brad Parscale, Trump's former campaign manager, had snuck into Cliff Klavan's home and slit his throat. I mean, I'm not surprised. I'm not surprised I heard this. Here, Mr. Trump, I bring you the head of Cliff Klavan. I can't believe Trump admitted that. Yeah, he just said it. I mean, I guess I can believe. He doesn't care. He's like, I'm untouchable. I've done this much so far. What are you going to do to me?

His move has often been to just say the, tell the truth, you know, and is convoluted, hard to follow away, but just tell the truth on television because there are things that he's tweeted that if a journalist had been able to like uncover it in a secret memo would be like a huge scandal. But because like so much of our like kind of culture around the news is built around like you have to discover something incriminating people don't just say something incriminating he like skips the like dramatic crescendo of like catching him yeah you know it's like it like if nixon like early on in watergate like he'd gone to the cameras and be like they broke into the watergate to help me win it would have been so boring by the time bob woodward and

and carl got around to it. Yeah, it's like it's not a scandal. It's like, well, I guess he just owned up to it, so. It's not new anymore. Good for him. At least he's honest. I just can't stand these phonies. Yeah, not talking about all their scandals. President Trump also signed a coronavirus relief executive action to halt evictions, claiming it would take care of pretty much this entire situation. But the text only asked federal agencies to consider if a

temporary halt to evictions might be a good idea. This is a momentous historic document right up there with the recommendation of independence and the emancipation insinuation. I like that. That's funny. Thanks, Ashir. Also, like, it kind of was an emancipation insinuation. I like that. That's funny. Thanks, Ashir. Also, like, it kind of was an emancipation insinuation. Yeah. Not everybody got freed as soon as I got signed. Right. It took a while still. Yeah. It took years. Years. Years. Yeah. Yeah. So. Because, right, because Juneteenth marks the fact that it took years for it to take to reach Texas. Yeah. Like two years. And then they were like, someone said, oh, by the way, you guys are free. Did you know? So this is like one of those things where like, you know, like if you meet somebody

and they tell you their name and then you don't remember it and then you know them for a really long time and it's too late to find out the name and you're not really afraid to ask them their name. This is a little bit like that in that like we should have told you this so many years ago and now we just feel so weird about it. Yeah. The masters were like, oh God, it's like too, it's like so awkward. I'm just so sorry. In Florida, Marion County Sheriff Bill Woods banned his deputies from wearing masks while working and banned visitors from wearing masks at the sheriff's office. He wrote in an email, the fact is the amount of professionals that give the reason why we should, I can find the exact same amount of professionals that say why we shouldn't.

It makes you think like how if a doctor says you need surgery to remove a tumor, but a dietician who once worked with Gwyneth and who took an online course in probiotics after a career in mixed media sculpture didn't work out says you only need a low FODMAP diet, you can just pick the one you like the most. Yeah.

This is literally the kind of thinking that killed Steve Jobs and now none of the chords make sense. Wait, what do you mean? Well, because Steve Jobs had cancer, and he didn't like the recommendation from the doctors he was meeting in the U.S., so he went to a kind of guru who was like, here, have this lemon water and just sort of meditate,

and now my computer can barely plug into my phone. And it affects us all. Damn it, Steve. Come on, Steve. Come on. Trust medical journals. Maybe then, what's it? Lightning cord, USB-C?

Come on, man. We needed you. Yeah. Also this week, Andrew Lloyd Webber volunteered to get an experimental COVID vaccine, saying he would do anything to prove that theaters could open safely. Here's hoping that the COVID antibodies don't make Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber their jellicle choice. Oh, no. Oh, no. I'm about to tell you the worst thing I've ever written down.

Ready? Ready. What if this experimental vaccine leaves a Jesus Christ super scar? Okay, that is really bad. I can see why you thought that was maybe good, but it's really bad. It's really bad. Do you have more? This actually is exciting.

Do you have more? This actually is exciting. On Wednesday, Los Angeles Mayor Eric Garcetti revealed the city's plan to accelerate development of a $10 at-home COVID test. So you're saying I could get three COVID tests or watch the live-action Mulan on Disney Plus? I think I know what I'm going to pick. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to stay home for weeks and enjoy this Mulan movie.

That is great. $30 is a lot of money, though. Yeah. It's a lot. The whole service is like $20. Yeah. It's a lot of money. I guess they're just really relying

on those kids to hold their parents hostage. And they will. And they'll get their Mulan. They'll get their Mulan. Yeah. And I hope they do. I hope they're just really relying on those kids to hold their parents hostage. And they will. And they'll get their Mulan. They'll get their Mulan. Yeah. And I hope they do. I hope they do. And I hope they do.

The Big Ten Sports Conference voted this week to postpone their college football season to spring of 2021, saying they are prioritizing the health and wellness of their student-athletes and do not want to risk anyone getting the coronavirus and an incurable head injury. Is that what they actually said? This is a joke. No, that's a joke. I see. They don't care about the injury part.

No. They want to make sure that there's no virus in the way of the terrible toll of this game. Yeah. You know? I tell you what. If they really cared about their student athletes, they'd pay them. They'd fucking pay them. It's crazy.

It is crazy. It's crazy that the coaches make... Like, I just don't understand what it's like to have like like that you know they have what do you call it their halftime i think that's what it's called one of those one of those halftimes you know and they all go in the locker room and the coach like gives them a pep talk like at somebody be like i'm sorry you want me to work harder that's this is a This is an amount where you, who made $100,000 today, think I am not giving it my all. Yeah.

And like, look, some of these guys are better than me. Like, they get on to other things. I'm just a person with a fake degree in communications when this is done. Oh, my God. Yeah. All those people who are just like trying for this dream and then get injured. And then what do you get from that? No endorsement deals.

Yeah. Nothing. Nobody's putting you in a split screen Nike commercial where half of you is Megan Rapinoe. No, that doesn't happen for you. No. Yeah. Thank God they're not forcing them to get Corona. Yeah.

In addition to not paying them. Also this week, Herman Cain tweeted two weeks after dying from the coronavirus. Hydroxychloroquine. It's pretty amazing. It's pretty good stuff. Brings you back from the dead. It brought him back. It brought him back.

Vladimir Putin announced that Russia would be approving a coronavirus vaccine without finishing the proper clinical trials. There is no scientific proof that this vaccine is safe or even works. And it was immediately administered to Andrew Lloyd Webber. I'll take it. I'll take anything. Please open the theaters. It's not worth it.

Like, yeah, he'll be. It's OK. Keep pumping stuff into this guy. He'll be the phantom of the of the opera. Oh, oh, that was just the actual title. That's it. You didn't even try to change it. Hey, you know,

after he got the coronavirus vaccine, he fell down and hit his head. It gave him a real Phantom of the Bopra. Jesus. Okay. I'm so sorry. You put me on the spot I didn't have anything

I had nothing I had nothing okay I'm glad you tried I'll tell you though speaking of Andrew Lloyd Webber given everything that's been going on we really all got to make sure we Evota I could have moved on

I'm doing this yeah I didn't even like it was just worse than the Bopper. Hey, this mail is coming so slowly. It's more like Starlight Local. Is this one of those things where it gets worse and then you think it's going to, like, go back up? Like, you think it's going to get, like...

I actually... Here's the thing. I don't. I don't think this gets better. I just can't stop. All right, I'm going to end it. I'll end it. All right, I'll do two more jokes

and then let you go back to a life that doesn't involve this. Kanye West had a private meeting with Jared Kushner last week. People are worried this is about Kanye's presidential bid, but I'm worried it's about an album. Oh my God.

Past the Kushner. That's good. That's good. That's good. It's not nothing. It's not nothing. It the Kushner. That's good. That's good. That's good. It's not nothing. It's not nothing. It's not nothing. Or maybe he's just trying to give him some Yeezys.

He's the new Yeezy model. Do they come in nine and a half super narrow? Slithery. Just very, very narrow. Very narrow. And finally this week, Cardi B and Meg Thee Stallion dropped an explosive new single titled W.A.P., a body positive summer empowerment jam that stands for withered ailing penis. I want you to know something.

Okay. I want you to know something. I can prove that there was an argument about this joke in which I said, I don't want to say this out loud. I'm glad you're on the right side of history. Travis, turn your damn camera on and you apologize to Shashir for making me say this fucking shit. We can go. I think Google Docs retains a lot of data.

It's just, how dare you? How dare you bring a penis into this beautiful empowering anthem for women i'm so upset so shears have made i thank you so much for joining us i'm such a huge fan and uh for everybody listening check out her special check out if you want just a a soothing balm of wonderful friendship in a dark time I recommend Best Friends Shashir and Nicole Byer it is a delight

to listen to and I highly recommend so Shashir thank you so much oh I also have a movie coming out oh you should watch that

it's called Spree it's a thriller and it's out tomorrow so whenever this comes out wow it'll be out already on Video On Demand

so check it out. Check out Spree. Sashir Zameda. Thank you so much. Thank you. Good to see you. Good to see you too. Thanks to Sashir for joining us.

When we come back, Alyssa Mastromonaco, returning champion, of course, joins to talk about the selection of Senator Kamala Harris to join Joe Biden on the ticket. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. She is the co-host of Hysteria, and that's The Ticket, a three-part series about choosing a vice president, which you can hear on the Pod Save America feed anytime you want. It's there right now. They did a great wrap-up episode today on Pod Save America, the main Pod Save America, the mothership. Please welcome back Alyssa Mastromonaco. John Lovett. You're gorgeous.

No, you're gorgeous. Thank you. We're both gorgeous. So let's talk about it. We're here. You know, you were walking us through the process all along. Now it's happened. Joe Biden selected Senator Kamala Harris to be his VP pick. Obviously, we're all very excited. I want to hear what you think about the announcement itself. How do you think they did at a time when there were so many challenges to rolling this out? You know, in previous eras, VP picks have been smuggled in vehicles. How do you think it went? as VP picks have been smuggled in vehicles. How do you think it went?

So let's just give them credit off the bat. It did not leak. People found out, Americans found out who he picked from the Biden campaign. So that is a huge win for them. Good for them, especially since they had 11 women that were under consideration. And he started calling the women earlier that day. So it's like, you know, I give them tons of credit for that. I didn't get my text message that I signed up for dutifully.

But like technology sucks. Joe was writing them as fast as he could. He was writing them as fast as he could. One at a time. It's a lot of people. Of course, I'm the one who didn't even remember that we used text messages on the Obama campaign. So I'm not really your finger in the wind there. Then they did their event. And a couple things. One, the ad that they released with Kamala, where Joe Biden is asking Kamala if she wants to be the vice president, I thought was super charming

and adorable. And things can really be poorly done when you're trying to be cute and charming and so like good for them sure um sure the event yesterday was good because you know I'm such a I can be a real dick when it comes to events like I'm very listen I get it I can be a real dick. No, you have high standards. I do. I do. And so, you know, when we did That's the Ticket, I had really lofty ideas for what I would want to do if I were them. And they didn't ask me, even though I basically sent out the bat signal. But that's fine. Good for them. I thought that they might have gone with like a big picture. Do you know what I mean?

Like Biden and Kamala and Battery Park, Statue of Liberty behind, make this whole like 360. The first thing Trump did was kick immigrants out of this country and we're here to restore the soul of America. They didn't. I get it. You can't make the perfect the enemy of the good. The most important thing out of yesterday was that they appear together, right? We wanted to see them together for the first time and they did. And so I thought that was good. Kamala's speech, the thing that I was most

impressed about by Kamala was that she thrived without an audience. Like I was really blown away by the fact that I couldn't tell if there were people in front of her or not. She genuinely was emotive and great. I would say maybe without audiences, Joe Biden's speeches should be just like a little shorter. Yeah, I agree with that. Just a little shorter. And that's not a judgment. This is not, you know, thriving and flourishing and giving an important speech in front of essentially an empty room in a black box is not easy. But that would just that would be my

little, little bit of feedback. I thought they both did well, given the circumstances of not having a big crowd. I agree that Biden's speech was like, oh, this let's get to there's a main event here. It was a bit I get it, though, because it was an opportunity to deliver a message for a captive audience of national political reporters who would be watching, who would be covering, would be on television. So I get that. Seeing Kamala speak, it was a good, first of all, it was a great speech, but also it reminded me why Kamala is a good pick. You really see her in that moment. And what I always have been struck by with Kamala Harris is I learned a term from sports, and I'm going to say it, and it's going to sound wrong coming from me. I'm just going to say it, okay? Yeah. It's apparently something called the clutch gene. Didn't know. Learn something new. I've heard it. I've heard it. But I've heard it

from other people. I've heard it from straight people. But every time Kamala Harris is in a big hearing moment, every time she was in a debate where she had to really deliver in that speech this week, she just closes. She just comes and she brings it. And she had such passion and intensity and delivered those lines so well. So it made me see like, oh, I see why she is going to be a formidable part of this ticket. I mean, look, there are four people now on the ballot. Trump, Biden, Pence, Kamala Harris. Kamala Harris is a great speaker

and a great person at delivering a message. And it is nice that there is a person who can do that. I agree. No, I got to say that in a nicer way. I got to say that. And I think that's great. It's a compliment to Kamala. It's a compliment to Kamala.

I'm not saying anything about any of the others, but it's great that we have that person who can deliver that message. I agree. And you know, the one thing that I did want to say, because like I said, I can be a dick, is that when we were in the White House, when we first got to the White House, there would be like old school Clinton folks who, you know, had been there in the 90s. And they would go on television and say how like our events were not imaginative and that we didn't do things like take the president to the Grand Canyon to sign legislation. And the truth

is they had not been president post 9-11, right? Nobody, like the Bush administration understood, we understood. There are different constraints. So that's why, even though in my DNA, it is to be a bit of a dick about events, I do not know how hard it is to do what they are doing. So I caveat my dickishness. I also thought today they did a coronavirus briefing that looked great. You know, I just think that they're truly grappling with these completely new problems and trying to figure out how to make nice looking events when there are all these constraints and seeing them at those sort of desks across from each other.

Like if you stop and think about it for a second, you're like, where are we? What is happening? But it looks great. And it looks, it really has infused, I think just in these last 48 hours, Kamala Harris being part of this ticket has just infused their campaign with some energy, with a great message delivery apparatus.

Not just that Kamala Harris is a great messenger, but that together there is a message, the two of them side by side, that just works on television, works in this moment. So that has gotten me really excited. And you believe they're enjoying themselves, right? Like they're enjoying their partnership out of the gate, basically. Yeah.

How long do you think until Doug is a sex symbol? Haven't you seen the Jewish tabloids? I think I read forward.com that said he's sexy Jewish dad. He's hot Jewish dad. It's already starting. It's already starting. Who can blame people? He's very charismatic.

So as we... So, you know, Trump kind of had a meandering attack. They really don't seem to know how to attack Kamala just yet, though I'm sure they'll get their shit together at some point. But they seem to want to say that she's sort of a corporate cop, but also a leftist member of Antifa. How do you see any weaknesses emerging of Senator Harris on the ticket? You know, I think it's interesting because like, I mean, you know, better than anyone, they had so much time, Trump and Pence and his flunkies, that is.

They had so much time to come up with something that you're like, is this honestly the best they can do? Like, I was hoping for something a little better, like just something to give us fodder to talk about. But nasty, mean, what? Like, slow Joe and phony Kamala. Slow Joe and phony Kamala. I feel like, you know, the one thing that was good about Biden picking Kamala is that she went through like 540 primary debates. She, you know, had been on all the nightly shows. She's been on the comedy shows. She's been on the talk shows. Like, she's done it all. Like, she's pretty well known. And the Trump folks had all this time to come up with something better. So I'm not really sure. Like painting her as both Jamie Dimon and Bernie Sanders, it's a tough needle to thread. That is. And it's a good omen at a time when there aren't many that both that what Biden and Harris have in common is it has been hard for them to figure out how to land an attack on them directly. When you're comparing Kamala Harris to Bernie Sanders, you're trying to bank shot a

criticism of Bernie Sanders. When you say that, oh, Joe Biden's lost a step, he's really going to be AOC pulling the levers. You're really criticizing AOC because you don't have a criticism of Biden. So maybe that's a hopeful note. Alyssa, any final thoughts? Thank you for your time. I know that there are too many people looking to get your thoughts. So many. On this vice presidential process. And you've given us so many insights. But if you have one more to share before we go.

Maybe Kamala should get a dog. That's it. Get a dog, Kamala. Actually, get a cat, Kamala. Get a cat. Yes. Yes. I want a cat in the West Wing. A cat. Do you want a cat, Kamala. Get a cat. Yes. Let's not. I want a cat in the West Wing.

A cat. They're barely domesticated. All right. They're just little predators. Well, you know what? My cats can clearly tell that because this is the first podcast they have not come to try to be a part of. Alyssa Mastromonaco, thank you as always.

Bye. When we come back, I'm going to quiz a listener about the Democratic plan, the Republican plan, and Trump's plan for how to respond to the economic crisis. Don't go anywhere. This is Love It or Leave It, and there's more on the way. And we're back. America is facing three crises at once. There is the battle to reimagine public safety in our cities. There is the worsening public health crisis,

thanks to the failed Trump response to the pandemic. And there is the economic crisis, where America faces the highest rates of unemployment in a century, once again, thanks to the failed response to COVID-19. In the last month, Republicans stonewalled Democrats over a new round of relief, and the Senate adjourned without reaching a deal. Then earlier this week, Trump issued a series of basically useless and in some cases, unconstitutional executive orders that do almost nothing to fix the problem. So let's compare these plans in a game we're calling

Democrats, Republicans, or a dotty old fascist. And here to play the game, we have Laura Petto. Hi. Laura, where are you from? I am from New Hampshire. You're from New Hampshire and you're holding some kind of an animal there. Is that a cat? Yes. This is my kitten, Sophie, who is wearing an Elizabeth Warren persist collar. Uh-huh. Yeah.

Uh-huh. Big structural mange. That's the thing you got to watch out for. Yeah, I will. All right. Well, Laura, how are you doing, by the way? How's it going up there in New Hampshire? Doing okay?

Yeah. I mean, we're doing pretty well up here. We've had zero cases in my town since May. So that's good. That's good. That's good. Maybe your mayor isn't a QAnon believer, you know, supports masks and so forth? No.

Okay. So here's how it works. Laura, I'm going to read a real fact about one of the plans and you have to tell us if it's from the Democratic plan, the Republic plan, or if it's from the executive order signed by a dotty old fascist. Okay? Okay. Here we go. This plan would provide 16 billion for COVID testing. Democrat. No, Republican. This plan would provide 75 billion for COVID testing and contact tracing. No, Republican. This plan would provide $75 billion for COVID testing and contact tracing. Democrat. Correct. This plan would address unemployment by giving Americans $200 per week through September. Republican. Correct. This plan would address unemployment by guaranteeing American $300 a week by taking money from FEMA disaster relief, which could only last for like a month. Fascist. Got it. This plan would address

unemployment by continuing the $600 per week benefit until January. Democrat. Correct. This plan would freeze student loan payments and interest until the end of December. Democrat. No, daddy old fascist. You got one by you there. It's not the worst part of that. That one, that one I'm okay with. Let's just, let's just face it. You know, this plan would freeze all student loan payments and interest for a full year and provide 22 billion for student loan forgiveness. Democrat. Yeah. This plan would provide all student loan payments and interest for a full year and provide $22 billion for student loan forgiveness. Democrat. Yeah.

This plan would provide one-time stimulus checks of $1,200 to individuals and $2,400 to married couples plus $500 per dependent. Democrat. No, that's the Republican plan. This plan would provide a one-time stimulus check of $1,200 to individuals, $2,400 to married couples, and $1,200 per dependent. Democrat. Yeah. The better one is the Democrats. That's the game.

Laura, look, sometimes what we do is hard, you know? Sometimes what we do is, the Democrats are better, you know? This plan doesn't provide stimulus checks, but it will make an attempt to defer payroll tax payments from September to December for people earning less than $100,000 per year. It's unclear if companies will comply with this, though, since they'd have to withhold huge amounts from their employees' paychecks all at once when taxes are due. It's also unclear

how Medicare and Social Security will be funded without the payroll taxes, especially if this policy continues. Republican? Daddy Old Fascist from the EO. It was covered as a payroll tax holiday, but it's not really a holiday. Like, I don't think you consider it a holiday if your boss is like, you can take today off, but you do have to work Christmas. Yeah. This plan would provide $105 billion in aid to schools, but two thirds is set aside for elementary and secondary schools that would only get the money if they held in-person classes, meaning only schools that worsen the pandemic can get the pandemic relief. Fascist.

Republicans. Republicans. He couldn't do anything for the schools. I'm just so badly. You're doing fine. Hey, Laura, hey, I don't think that's the persistence that you've been inspired to live up to based on a caller, based on a candidate. You know what I mean? Yeah. This plan would provide $25 billion to defense contractors. Republican. Got it. This plan would provide $25 billion to save the postal service. Democrat. Correct. This plan includes $3.6 billion for states to ensure election safety and security and to facilitate voting by mail.

Democrat. Correct. And finally, this plan includes $1.75 billion to construct a new FBI headquarters across from one of President Trump's hotels. Fascist. No, it's he supports it. In fairness to you, Laura, he supports it. But it's actually in the Republican proposal that they spend almost $2 billion. But it's actually in the Republican proposal that they spend almost $2 billion.

And it is $2 billion if you also include the fact that they want to renovate the West Wing. So they won't provide money for the post office or elections that are coming during this crisis, but they will invest in a renovated FBI building. Now, the FBI building, Laura, is very ugly. Have you seen the FBI building? No, I have not. Well, you should know that it sucks. It's a behemoth, and it's really not great. But if you had to choose between a safe election and an architecturally more satisfying FBI headquarters, to me, it's not a hard call. I don't know how you feel.

Not a hard call at all. Laura and Sophie, you've won the game. So excited. Made my week. What are you doing up there in New Hampshire these days? What's your day like? Walk me through a typical day. So I am getting my PhD in math.

I know. And you are a math major at Williams. Give me the topic. What are we studying? What are we proving? What are we working on? I work on inverse problems, specifically medical imaging. So getting from the data back to what I'm trying to reconstruct. So basically,

you're trying to figure out ways to take an image, it gets broken down into data, and then make it back into some kind of diagnostic tool, something you can read from the data. What are you trying to do? When there's an inverse problem, whether it's in medical imaging, if you get an ultrasound, the data they collect is not an image. It's like sound waves or something like that, depending on what application, whether it's an MRI or an ultrasound. And so basically, you have to go from the data to figure out what underlying image reproduced it. The idea of my thesis is how to use methods in optimization and Bayesian statistics

to improve the accuracy of the image you reconstruct. The data isn't the image. The image is the image. The data is a representation of the image. And you are trying to say, how faithfully can we make sure that the image the data creates has fidelity to the original image that is not

recorded anywhere? It's you're kind of imagining what a perfect version of the data might be. Is that right? That is exactly it. I do error modeling, trying to model what the most likely error is. I know you're a math major. I don't know if you took like anything with Fourier analysis or anything like that. I'll tell you this much. If I did, it's gone. Anyway, so basically trying to model the entire process using the knowledge that you're not actually collecting what you want to collect, if that makes any sense. How are algorithms doing? I'm still a PhD student, so my algorithms aren't as good as people who've been working in like this for 20 or 25 years. But I feel like they're pretty good and they're really amazing at being able to predict the amount of error that you're going to have.

Interesting. Yeah, it's really cool. I don't totally understand what you're working on, but it was fun to try to figure out if I could get it because I haven't done hard math in a long time. And if Frank Morgan, my thesis advisor, is listening, I did my best. I'm trying. Laura Petto, what a delight. Thank you. Bye. When we come back, I'll be joined by Ben Rhodes. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. He is the former deputy national security advisor under President Barack Obama, co-host of Pod Save the World, and host of Crooked's brand new podcast, Missing America, which is out right now.

Please welcome back to the show for a segment we call Old Town Roads because it was our first idea and we just gave up. Ben Rhodes. It's good to be on a socially distanced Love It or Leave It. Yeah. No, it's nice to see you again. Yeah. I mean, the last time we did this show, it was at, I believe, the Comedy Store. There were humans there.

I remember that for sure. And we said to ourselves, let's just hope that a big crisis doesn't happen between now and the election. So I want to talk about the new podcast because I've listened and it's really fantastic and everybody should subscribe to Missing America. But first, a bunch of big foreign policy stories from this week. And I just want to kind of give people a rundown on each of them. So first, Trump is lauding an announcement about diplomatic relations between Israel and the UAE. What happened and what do you think?

What was announced is that the UAE and Israel plan to normalize relations, establish formal diplomatic relations, which they don't have, which could open up space for things like flights and additional commerce between Israel and the UAE. In response, Israel said it's suspending plans to annex a chunk of the West Bank, which would have been a very bad thing to do in any circumstance. And Trump decided and declared that he should get the Nobel Peace Prize. Look, stepping back for just a quick summary of what I think has happened here, and I apologize for my cynicism. It's an unalloyed good thing if Israel normalizes relations with more Arab countries in addition to Jordan and Egypt and Morocco.

That said, the UAE and Israel have had pretty close relations anyway for a long time, dating back certainly to when we were in the Obama administration. In fact, some of their closeness was coordinating their opposition to the Iran nuclear deal. But they've drawn closer over the years. So this kind of advances, I think, what was the de facto in the region. And it does nothing to actually achieve the real piece that needs to happen, which is the Palestinian state. And in fact, the Palestinians were entirely cut out of this. So the leader of the UAE, Mohammed Zayed, gets to do something that helps his buddy Donald Trump in the White House. Bibi Netanyahu does something that, frankly, also helps Donald Trump, gives him a win before the election.

Donald Trump, you know, gives them a win before the election. Also, frankly, they do something that helps consolidate their own position and doesn't really help advance the cause of peace for the Palestinians, in my view. If somehow this magically opens up a pathway to a broader peace, that's great. Otherwise, I think it's something that essentially ratifies what has been somewhat of the status quo in the Middle East for some time now. Yeah, I mean, when I saw the statement, I just said, OK, seems like Bibi's doing a favor for Trump so that Trump has a retweet. Like practically, there's no actual other changes that are gonna happen because of this.

Yeah, I mean, there could be like, you know, flights from Tel Aviv to Abu Dhabi and Dubai and again, some increased tourism and commerce, but that's really the direction things have been going anyway with the Emiratis in Israel is not the core of the problem in the Middle East. It's a lot of other things, including Israel and the Palestinians. And so the fanfare around this that Trump will build up, you know, is all about Trump. And I think for MBZ, who's been under a lot of pressure from Democrats because of their war in Yemen that

has killed so many people, their support for Mohammed Salman, frankly, their opposition to the Democratic Party in the embrace of Trump. This is also a bit of a hedge for Mohammed Salman, frankly, their opposition to the Democratic Party in the embrace of Trump. This is also a bit of a hedge for MBZ, you know, because Democrats will want to welcome this deal because it's good for Israel. In the same way that Netanyahu, who's under huge protest in Israel because of his handling of coronavirus, he was not going to be able to proceed with annexation given the current environment in Israel. So he didn't really give up anything and he got something, at least something symbolic. And, you know, that's about what this is. It's not much more than that. So next topic. So like your podcast, there's just so much happening. Your podcast is about

right-wing nationalism and authoritarianism in the U.S., but around the world and some of the lessons that we can draw from some of the efforts to push back. You know, we're seeing in Belarus right now an authoritarian trying to hold on to power in the wake of mass protests after a clearly fraudulent election result. What are you taking away from what's happening right now in Belarus? And what are the lessons for us as we head into an election with a kind of whatever improv authoritarian who's watching closely as well? Well, I mean, the lesson I take away is that people around the world are completely fed up with a very particular brand of authoritarianism, John. It's rooted in corruption, basically all

these leaders who enrich themselves to stay in power so they can further enrich themselves and repress their own people. And this kind of nationalist brand of authoritarianism that we see across the West and frankly around the world. And what you see is people are fed up. Like all of Belarus basically came out. They've never had protests like this. Of course, the leader cracks down, he ignores it, but they're still not giving up. There are general strikes happening in Belarus. Like, so you've got a guy who declared victory

with a totally fabricated 80% rough election result. You've got a population that's rejecting it. And I think it's kind of emblematic of what's happening in a lot of places around the world, which is there's growing mobilization and disgust with this brand of leadership. And then these leaders desperately trying to cling on. And I frankly think that even if he may weather this storm, it's an indication that time is beginning to run out on this playbook. So then also this week, the office of the Director of National Intelligence released a statement. Basically, it turns out Robert Draper, a great reporter for the New York Times, was sort of beating them the door of the administration saying, we're hearing reports

of Russian interference. We're hearing reports of Russian interference. Right before his story comes out, they put out this statement from the Trump administration that basically says, yes, Russia is looking to interfere in our election, but so is China, so is Iran. It's a big problem on both sides, though it's very clear based on what senators like Dick Blumenthal have said, who's part of the Intelligence Committee, who's seen some of this information. It's pretty clear based on what we're hearing that this is a way to give Trump cover. And the real issue remains sophisticated efforts by Russia to interfere in our election that are not on par with anything any other country are doing.

What do you think that members of Congress should be doing? And what do you think the Biden campaign should be doing right now in the wake of these sort of semi revelations? Well, I mean, first of all, reject the statement from the director of national intelligence is total bullshit. Because the creating of both sides between Russia's systematic multifaceted assault on our democracy on behalf of Donald Trump and routine Chinese propaganda against U.S. policy is not about electing Joe Biden or anybody else. That's just not the same thing. But they're setting up this playbook where they can say that everybody's doing it. It's helping both parties. setting up this playbook where they can say that everybody's doing it. It's helping both parties.

Frankly, if Biden wins, I guarantee you the Republicans will try to turn Chinese intervention or Iranian intervention in our election into the new Russia investigation so they can, you know, engage in their own conspiracy theorizing for years. I think Democrats have to call it out. Democrats have to tell people what to expect is going to happen. Tell people, here are the arguments you're going to hear, and this is why it's bullshit. Frankly, publicize information. I'm tired of hearing Democrats about how troubled they are about the briefings they're getting. Just tell us already what you know.

Yeah, at least, at the very least, fucking threaten it. Say I'm going to go to the Senate floor and tell the people what they know. I'm allowed, I am constitutionally protected. I can go to the Senate floor and I can tell people the truth. At least threaten it, like really threaten it. That's right. And because what are they, you know, the only reason to not reveal something is it gives

up sources and methods of intelligence gathering. I think the Russians are aware, you know, that we're watching this stuff. But John, I'm going to connect the three segments right now. Holy, it's okay. Because what is happening in the world? You have a collection of autocratic, corrupt leaders who will do anything to keep themselves in power. And they have overlapping interests, right? So, Mohammed Zayed and the Emirates and Bibi Netanyahu in Israel, they're helping each other out and helping out their buddy Donald Trump.

Vladimir Putin is helping out Donald Trump. Donald Trump is silent about Lukashenko in Belarus, who's also a very close ally of Vladimir Putin is helping out Donald Trump. Donald Trump is silent about Lukashenko in Belarus, who's also a very close ally of Vladimir Putin. This is not a grand conspiracy theory, by the way. I'm not suggesting that there's some puppet master that's Putin behind everything. It's just a plain fact that there's a bunch of nationalist corrupt authoritarians

who are running all these places and don't want things to change because the current system allows them to get rich and be in power. And if one of their dominoes start to fall, they know that publics around the world might allows them to get rich and be in power. And if one of the dominoes start to fall, they know that publics around the world might get hip to the fact that maybe we can get rid of these guys. That's the common thread. And it's also what informs, I think, you know, the podcast, obviously, that we're going to talk about.

So let's talk about the podcast because, you know, I've heard the first couple of episodes and I do, I appreciate you linking these things together because it is you trying to kind of tell a story to help us understand what led to this moment, and then some of the tools and ideas and people who are kind of showing how we can combat right wing nationalism, populism here at home around the world. So what should people know about the podcast? Well, that's the thing is, you know, I traveled a lot over the last several years. And I frankly, just kind of started recording interviews a couple years ago, with people around the world, because I found that they were dealing with the same crap that we were, you know, nationalism, authoritarianism, disinformation, this kind of corruption, infecting politics everywhere. And kind of what I found is, we could learn a bit about what was

happening to ourselves by looking about what was happening in other places. And we could also learn a bit about what to do about it. So the next episode, which is, I think, pretty central to the series that drops next week, is about nationalism in Europe. And the story that is told is essentially after the financial crisis in 2008, essentially the collapse of confidence in globalization and democracy and liberal democracy, there was a bit of a crisis of meaning inside of Western countries. People had given up faith in their institutions. And the people who filled that space were nationalists, right-wing nationalists who came along and offered people a sense of belonging to a team, the winning team, the us versus

them team. The us is whoever the white people are in that country or the white kind of Christian people in Hungary or in Russia. And the them are immigrants or Muslims or George Soros or John Lovett, you know. And, you know, essentially that kind of powerful, potent story is behind Brexit. It's behind Viktor Orban in Hungary. It's behind Donald Trump. But you see people mobilizing in response to that. And you see in Europe some interesting tactics, people really going local and building grassroots movements, people using technology and new ways of organizing, and people trying to find different politics that offer people meaning in standing up to this brand of nationalism and kind of reclaiming

their national identities from the autocrats. And that's, I think, what we're going to have to do in our election. And that's what America is going to have to try to stand for in the world if we have a change in president. I do think that that Democratic primary politics has at least obliquely been trying to grapple with some of these questions, right? Like, how do we answer nationalism?

How do we answer mistrust? How do we answer a lack of faith in institutions? Do you think the Democrats are doing enough to internalize some of these lessons from around the world? What do you think? I think we need to do more. And in the podcast, you'll hear kind of the people

who will probably be in charge of foreign policy for Biden. But you hear from a lot of progressive activists and political leaders around the world who in some ways, it's easier for them to acknowledge just how broken everything had gotten because they're not American. And in many ways, the collapse and unraveling of a world order we built is harder for us to accept. But I think if you look at the Democratic Party, what I find that's really interesting, John, when you think about this is there are elements of the key voices in the primary that are each right. Bernie's critique of what's gone wrong is, I think,

the most accurate, you know, that essentially failures of late stage capitalism and the emptiness and corruption of our politics has made people really angry. And Bernie gives voice to that. At the same time, I think the whole soul of the nation thing shouldn't be overlooked either, that you have to have politicians who offer some form of national identity to people. And yet there was this gap. And I find, and we talk about this on the podcast, the thing that is filling the gap to me is the Black Lives Matter movement. Because that's about fighting for a different form of national identity that has a

policy agenda attached to it, but also has something more fundamental about what do we think it means to be American? What's our story in the world? And one point we show in the podcast is that movement spawned movements in other countries. And the irony of where we find ourselves, John, is that all these right-wing authoritarian nationalists we talked about, they've been coordinating for years. They have common sources of finance and common strategies of politics. And progressives need to do that too. Not just the US government, but progressives, I think at at a movement level have to be connected and learn from one another around the world. There's a connection that's, I think, been drawn fairly just because in practice this

has been true, that the politicians most often talking about the kind of core emotional needs, the lack of dignity people feel in our system, the lack of agency are those people like Bernie who have talked about that. But, you know, you put aside the center left policies, you also feel in the kind of rhetoric of the center left for a long time, there really was a failure to account for the pain people felt, the lack of dignity people felt, even when the economy was growing, even when people felt as though things economically were working, that there was something missing. When we talk about a society with such giant corporations having such influence over people's lives, the kind of decline of small businesses, the decline of manufacturing, there's a failure to reckon with the change that was happening. And it seems like maybe now finally, democratic

politicians are kind of acknowledging that change in some way. Yeah. And if you look at the episodes we do in the podcast, kind of take on these forces that are so big, disinformation, climate change, these kind of fallout, like you said, the wreckage of how globalization has created so many losers relative to winners. I think sometimes it's hard for progressives to understand why that would lead people to the right, not to the left, because it seems like, you know, the economic structure is screwing everybody. So you should become a populist of the left. But I think what it means is when people have nowhere to turn, they're just more vulnerable to these appeals to nationalism. They're more vulnerable to say the Chinese are offering more prosperity in exchange for giving up all your freedoms.

Well, maybe that's a more attractive model. And I think it's a matter of progressives having to realize that it's not enough to be right about policy, just as it's not enough to be right about your basic story. You need that whole package in a way that can appeal to people and can win these political fights in the streets and in the ballot box. Well, everybody, please subscribe to Missing America. You won't regret it. It does an incredible job of connecting all of these disparate elements domestically and around the world. Ben, thank you so much for joining us. It was awesome, John. Good talking to you. When we come back, we'll end on a high note. Don't go anywhere. This is Love It or Leave It,

and there's more on the way. And we're back. Because we all need it this week, here it is, this week's high note submitted by you, the listener. Hi, I love it. This is Monica from Delaware, about 10 minutes from the Binding Cave. And my High Note was that my son took his first step. We've run into so many marches in his stroller, and it's really amazing to think that now he'll be marching with me, helping to make the future better for him. So I'm really excited for that. Hey, Levitt. It's Austin in Arizona. My friend just won his primary race last week to be the mayor of the town that I live in.

We are so excited that he's doing that. And he beat the establishment candidate. He's running as a progressive. And it's just really awesome to see. Hey, Levitt. This is Morgan from Brandon, Florida. I just finished a contactless Canvas. It is 93 degrees out in Brandon.

And we delivered literature to 500 voters in this district for a local candidate. And she's running in District 59. Really excited to get out here again next week and do it again while listening. Love it or leave it. I love it. This is Rebecca in Ohio. And my high note this week is that the teen-led youth movement I work for just launched our campaign to get teens involved in the election, registering voters, getting people to sign up as poll workers, and a lot of other great things. The response already has been overwhelming, and I'm really excited to see how change can change the face of the election. Thanks.

Thanks to everybody who submitted a high note. If you want to leave us a message about something that gave you hope, you can call us at 424-341-4193. And I'm so grateful to everybody who has sent them in over the past months. They've been really nice. We have 80 days until the election. Sign up for Vote Save America right now to elect Joe Biden and Kamala Harris

to keep the House, to win back the Senate. Thank you to Sashir Zameda, Alyssa Mastromonaco, and Ben Rhodes for joining us. Thank you to our grocery workers, truck drivers, delivery people, restaurant workers and flight attendants, teachers, administrators, everybody who is working right now. Thank you to our doctors and nurses and EMTs and first responders. And thank you to our whole staff working to keep this show going out and Crooked going strong. Love It or Leave It is a Crooked Media production.

It is written and produced by me, John Lovett, Elisa Gutierrez, Lee Eisenberg, and our head writer and the president of the East Side or Biden writers, Travis Helwig. Jocelyn Kaufman, Alicia Carroll, and Peter Miller are the writers. Our assistant producer is Sydney Rapp. Bill Lance Thank you.