Lovett or Leave It - Big Not So Little Lies

Episode Date: July 27, 2019

Veep's Matt Walsh, reporter Emily Jane Fox, and writer/comedian Diallo Riddle join Jon to break down the Mueller hearings and talk of impeachment, Trump's reaction, the Equifax breach, plus rants about DC statehood, Hope Hicks, and congressional hearings that start at 5am. 

Good evening, Los Angeles. Good to see all of your bright shimmering faces. Everyone here displaying the right amount of optics. Before we get to the show, a little housekeeping. This is a tough one. For a limited time only, merch is on sale at the Crooked store. Take Trump's approval rating up to 40% off select items. Free shipping on all orders over $75.

And I want you to know something. This very morning, Jon Favreau did not have the stones to read this card. But I can do it. Crooked.com. And limited tickets left for our benefit at the Greek

on August 17th. Jemele Hill, Amanda Seals, Best Coast, Jim James, and Maggie Rogers. Huge show. So get those tickets. Proceeds from the show will be donated to organizations at the forefront of the fight to protect the vote across America

vote.org, election protection the national redistricting foundation and think social impact last but not least love it or leave it, Radio City Music Hall Friday, September 13th tickets are moving, and we're going to have some very exciting announcements soon.

Very exciting. Crooked.com slash events end of housekeeping. So here we are. We all saw play out on television a final act in a story that's been unfolding for years. You wait for this event. You hype it up. You trust the team that has patiently crafted a narrative, anticipating this final

confrontation, this showdown. A witness facing off against an interlocutor with everything on the line. The stakes absolutely total. And then it's here, the main event. It happens. At long last, the witness takes the stand. Finally, the hard questions.

Finally, the truth for the world to see. You were excited. You got others excited. You promised an epic battle, and then you realize, you realize you were wrong, and you realize something else. Maybe the problem isn't that there wasn't enough of a sense of excitement or drama or surprise in that final showdown. Maybe the issue is you were

wrong all the way through. Your anticipation was misplaced. Your hopes were too high. Think about it. There could never be a big reveal because there wasn't a big secret. Not really. Maybe there was a year ago, but now with all we've learned, we've been given all the facts that we could ever have needed. We know the truth before the witness ever took the stand and so we weren't looking for someone to surprise us we were looking for someone to go back and make us care more about the truth we already knew

and that just wasn't possible I am talking about the finale of Big Little Lies that's right it's time for gay news of Big Little Lies. That's right. It's time for gay news. Couple key points. The transition of Big Little Lies from Sharp Objects to Ally McBeal is officially complete.

And if anyone in this room thinks I'm going to say a critical word about those performances, you can leave right now. Because I will not. Those women were magical. That said, there's very much a classic TV judge who's like, I'm going to allow it.

To manning to give speeches for no reason? I'll allow it. Surprising a woman with a PowerPoint of her sex no reason I'll allow it surprising a woman with a powerpoint of her sex partners I'll allow it badgering a mother about an ancient car accident in which a child unrelated to these proceedings died I'm gonna keep you on a tight leash but I'll allow it showing a clip of spousal abuse to the mother of the adult abuser

to prove she's a bad mom without evidence as all abusers are the result of the adult abuser to prove she's a bad mom without evidence as all abusers are the result of bad parenting directly and 100%? I'll allow it. What's it gonna take for Laura Dern's character to get a divorce?

Also, finally, Meryl Streep needs to play more villains. It was very exciting. Stop bringing life and nuance and charm to the Iron Lady. Show me a monster, please. Devil Wears Prada doesn't count.

Do you want to know why? She's not the villain of that film. Adrienne Grenier is the villain of The Devil Wears Prada. That character is angry that his girlfriend has a job she cares about. And the film takes his side. Also, Anne Hathaway is a little bit the villain of that film because she literally quits her job

in the middle of a huge and important work trip abroad because she had the epiphany right then. Incredibly narcissistic and irresponsible. Don't just throw the phone in a fountain the day you decide to quit. That is crazy. You're gonna need a reference. The politics of a devil wears Prada are terrible.

And that's gay news. Back to Mueller. That guy needs to get his square jaw in that goddamn game. We'll talk about it. Let's start the show. That train set in Big Little Lies was Chekhov's gun in the mantle. The second I saw that dweeb with a train, I was like, Laura Dern will grab a baseball bat

and she will destroy these trains. Spoiler. Can you really spoil a show where they introduce voodoo in season two? All right. Let's start the show for real. She's a reporter for Vanity Fair and the author of Born Trump, Inside America's First Family. Please welcome Emily Jane Fox.

Hi, Emily. How you doing? I'm great. How are you? You just spoiled Big Little Lies for me. Yeah, no, I did. I did. I had one episode to go. Now I have no reason to live. Here's the thing. I think going in

with lowered expectations will provide ultimately a better experience. Well, I thought that this season ended with episode six and I was like, that's a crazy cliffhanger to end with that court scene

and I was ready for the next season but there's one more episode that's not great. like, that's a crazy cliffhanger to end with that court scene, and I was ready for the next season, but there's one more episode that's not great. Yeah, it's not great. It's incredibly disappointing. It makes you question being along for the journey the entire time, especially when you've stood on a stage week after week pumping it up. I remember being on this very stage a few weeks ago

with Emily Heller, who turned to me and said, aren't you gambling a lot going out this far when you don't know how the season ends? And it was written by one guy in a room, and I said, I don't give a shit. She was right. Have you learned anything? Oh, no, I'd make every mistake again.

He's a writer, actor, the co-creator of the brand-new Comedy Central show Southside and the co-creator of the brand new Comedy Central show, Southside, and the co-creator of Sherman's showcase on IFC. Please welcome Diallo Riddle. Just sat right down on the mic. How you doing, Diallo? I sat on the mic.

I'm good, I'm good. Hello. I like those patent leather shoes. It's Thursday,'s Thursday You gotta look No, I was coming from somewhere I feel dreadfully overdressed I love a patent leather shoe Oh, thank you

I think they're great This is already going better than I expected How much worse did you expect it to go? Alright He's the co-founder of the Upright Citizens Brigade and a twice Emmy-nominated actor for his performance in Veep. Please welcome Matt Walsh. Matt, thank you for being here.

Hi, everybody. Hi. How you doing, Matt? Good. It's fun. We had a funny moment before the show. We came out early, so we were stuck kneeling on the floor. We thought we were supposed to come out sort of like in a line.

We were so self-conscious because we were like, we stood up and we're both tall. And then we were blocking. See, it didn't affect your show at all. You didn't even notice us. No, you guys are pros. Professionals. I agree.

I think her husband needed some redeeming values. He didn't have any. At the point that she's like beating that Chekhov's train, I agree. I think her husband needed some redeeming values. He didn't have any. At the point that she's like beating that Chekhov's train or whatever you call it, that was great. I agree. I agree. I learned one lesson. Don't convince yourself that a show is good.

But you have to be hope. Come on, you got to get on board board you got to be blinded by your passions thank you matt but i got bored like season two i just got bored and i don't know why but i got bored so my wife finished them without me so i don't know that i remember three and four and then i was out it's a big moment in a relationship when you're watching a show together and you just say, leave me. Go on ahead. Go on ahead. It's okay. It's okay. Leave me. Please save yourself. Keep going. Keep going. Just leave me here.

Send help when you get to the end. Tell me what it's like. Call me from the other side. I'm going to seek redoubt here and protect myself here. Let's get into it. What a week. In six hours of testimony before two House committees Wednesday, former special counsel Robert Mueller made a few things clear. One, President Trump and his associates encouraged Russia to commit crimes

to help him win the presidency and then lied about it. Two, they repeatedly obstructed the investigation of those crimes. Three, America doesn't like looking at an old man on TV for very long. Mueller corrected Trump's biggest lie by asserting that his investigation did not exonerate Trump. Mueller said multiple times that a president could be indicted for crimes after their term was complete. Mueller said

Trump's love affair with WikiLeaks alone was enough to call for an investigation. Mueller acknowledged that Trump's written answers to his questions were incomplete and generally untruthful. Generally. Mueller said it was unethical, unpatriotic, and a crime in given circumstances for a presidential campaign to accept foreign assistance. And after all this, Democrats have refused to begin an impeachment inquiry behind closed doors.

We learned in Politico, Jerry Nadler pushed Nancy Pelosi to begin the process. Jerry wants to chair that hearing. This is what it's all about. Trump has been calling him Fat Jerry for two fucking decades. He wants that gavel. He wants to hit that gavel, and he says the impeachment inquiry

into the crimes of Donald Trump has fucking begun. But Nancy Pelosi continues to stonewall the process, and Jerry Nadler is too short to do anything about it. Shame on you, Travis. Shame on you. Short Jews with weight fluctuation can do great things in this country. You can do great things. Emily, I'll start with you. Great. Nancy Pelosi said if we're going to go to impeachment that she wouldn't go unless we had the strongest hand possible.

Do you believe there are other big revelations or moments that would tip us over into something where she views we've crossed that threshold? Or do you view this as more of a stalling tactic? I don't think that we're going to have a fact pattern that's different than what we know right now. I think that yesterday could have gone differently if this were a reality television show and not actual politics and a real investigation. But everyone was so disappointed yesterday after Mahler got up and he wasn't this white knight, savior, hero that we all expected. But if you actually listen to it, it was a big fucking deal. What we learned yesterday, what you just ran through, is a big deal. It just wasn't exciting.

It was bad television. So everyone who built this up as a TV spectacular was disappointed, but the meat and potatoes of it was very nutritional. And I think that what Mueller was most successful at was maybe he wasn't the hero, but he painted President Trump as the villain in a very successful way. And if Democrats can continue to do that and beat the drum every single week from now until the election in 2020, it'll be a successful reminder

that our president is a crook, that he is a criminal, that he obstructed justice, and that voters can count on that because the Democrats will put that forward every single week. You've got sources all over Trump world. You've got sources all over Trump world. You've got that

place wired. You're in there. You know their comings and their goings. Unfortunately. You're a fly on the wall. Are you hearing anything that's exciting for us? You mean like a new hairdo or something for Donald? Literally give us something. We've got one house of one part of our government.

We've been knocking on doors for two and a half years. Mueller kept asking people to repeat the question. These people need something. Well, let me tell you something I know I can tell you because a lot of the things that I hear every day, I don't know that I can repeat. Do you guys want to hear about Michael Cohen in prison? Is that exciting to you?

Okay. This I know I can tell you. Seems like the audience for that. So it's like shitty summer camp is the way it's been described to me. He is working on the HVAC system in prison. That detail was enough to get me through the two years I've had reporting on this character. Would you say that he is literally responsible in prison. That detail was enough to get me through the two years I've had reporting on

this character. Would you say that he is literally responsible in prison for stopping the blowing of hot air? I'll let you say it. I'll let you say it. Shitty summer camp, he's getting jacked. He's working out four days a week, reading a lot of books. You can fast forward

through that. You can fast forward through that. Playing tennis. Working on his own book. I'm sorry. There's tennis in there? They're playing tennis? Haven't you ever heard of Club Fed? I always thought when the Bluths were playing tennis that that was

a joke. Well, you know who's in there with him. Who's in there with him? The Situation. Oh my God. Oh, no know who's in there with him. Who's in there with him? The Situation. Oh, my God. Oh, no way. Billy McFarlane. Wow. The guy who leaked Jennifer Lawrence's explicit photographs. God, what a bridge club.

That's a place. What a place. I got to tell you, I'm really glad I asked that question. But also, no front runner on the tennis. I don't hear any big tennis players in there yet. I haven't witnessed. I can't say any big tennis players in there yet. I haven't witnessed. I can't say for certain. Okay.

Fascinating. Yeah. That's a great scoop. Yeah. Diallo. So going in, we knew Robert Mueller was a soft-spoken former Republican. Why was the media so hard on Mueller's performance? Part of this is, in fairness to reporters who talked about the optics,

that it was many Democrats who said this is an opportunity to bring the Mueller report to life. I have a big problem with the word optics. All the people in the media are talking about is optics. And I'm just like, we're the only people who have to worry about optics. Like, you've got another party that literally you can break the law

and you've got a whole lineup of people on a certain network and they will literally defend you you know slapping people in the face you know but like we're the people like oh but the optics are bad so for me yeah i always had a little bit of a doubt knowing muller's background like is this really the guy i even told people i was like i don't know if i trust him to be the guy like you know people like well he's a republican i was like so only republicans can investigate republicans now like that seems weird to me like he should have a completely liberal background people should be willing to listen to him so i actually never had the faith that others had in him the problem with optics to me as an idea is it implies that there's some other part of

journalism that's explaining things just taking the facts and reporting them out there's some other part of journalism that's explaining things, just taking the facts and reporting them out. There's the way the American people experience the news, which is some kind of unmediated, fact-based video of Mueller, information transferred. And then political journalism, the pundits, the analysis, the tweets, all of it is watching that coverage and providing context for those of us who follow it even more closely to understand how the politics is being received by the American people. The problem is that other thing, the straight, fact-based, substance, non-political mediation of the information doesn't exist. So the only news about political events is the mediated news about political events that is talking about the effectiveness of those a political events in real time and so the way you

learn that the optics of an event were bad is people on television describing the optics of the event as having been bad and therefore the way it seems is how it is because the way it seems is the only way it ever exists to those who didn't know how it is and only found out how it seemed by the people telling us how it seemed to them. I'm with you. It is the Ouroboros, a word I throw out at most twice a year. Matt, if you were Jerry Nadler and you wanted to convince Nancy Pelosi...

Fluctuating in weight, right? Yes, which is a struggle. All of it. Which is a struggle for many men's folk. He's a incredibly busy man. Lot on his plate. No judgment. I'm with him.

I can relate to fluctuations in weight. You're trying to convince Nancy Pelosi and a bunch of squeamish, squirrely, moderate Dems. They're easily frightened. They're jumpy. That it's time for impeachment. What are you going to say? Grandpa said he was a crook.

We watched Grandpa in Congress tell us that our president was a crook. We need to hit the crook. We need to use the word crook. I'd like some sort of gravitas, and I don't know if it'll move the needle, but I enjoyed the fact that Grandpa got up there, said, yeah, he's a crook. He didn't say it, he seemed it.

That was my take, and I can't be completely objective of my perspective, but I like the rapidity with which he threw out his, yeah, true, no, yes, what? Repeat it, got it, no, no. He didn't have to do much, but that's my optimistic slant. Yes, it is a bit

like he was trying to convey information to his family at a restaurant that is now too loud for him to be at. And he's sharp. He's a sharp man. He is sharp.

But he's older, so he's having a conversation, and he gets it. You know, he's tried to keep up. You know, he has an email account. He's traveling. He's staying sharp. He's playing ping pong. He's doing the things you do.

He's not just going to waste away. But I liked seeing him stare across from a congressman who was stacking various legal books to say, I looked for it here. I couldn't find the word exonerate. We looked for it here, whatever. And it was fun to see old Robert Mueller just go, I don't know. The weird thing to me was that he was asked for six hours about information on three pages of the report, and every time asked what page it was on, and

it was always on page 97. Every single time. I think it was a little bit of a fuck you to everyone, which is saying I told you motherfuckers, I was not going to do anything or tell you anything beyond this report, so when you ask me a question, I'm going to say, tell me

the page, I'm going to confirm it on the page. He was definitely running out the clock. Yeah. Would you read the question? Let me check. Hold on. Page 97? Yeah. Yeah. You just read a sentence from page 97. Thanks for dragging me out here. I'm a fucking hero. I did this to serve my country and go away. And you people just won't leave me alone. I did this to serve my country and go away. And you people just won't leave me alone. So the conversation now has turned to whether or not Democrats have, I don't think we'd say, added momentum to the impeachment.

No. But, Emily, to your point, there was a lot of damning information. Actually, today, what I saw unfold was a kind of second-order look at the way it was talked about yesterday. So yesterday was Trump and others saying it was a disaster for Democrats and the optics not being good. That followed a round of Democrats saying, don't focus on the optics.

What followed there were pundits saying, but Democrats told us to focus on the optics. You said it was about the optics, and Democrats saying, well, maybe, but shh, fuck, fuck, still, facts, they're important, right? Somebody focus on the substance. And today it seems like there really was a conversation about whether or not Robert Mueller provided Democrats enough information to pursue impeachment. You have Jerry Nadler behind closed doors hankering for impeachment. What do you think is going to happen?

And do you think, though, that it's the obligation of members of Congress, is what I think, that it's the obligation of a member of Congress to not let the American people lead them, but for them to lead and say Nixon's impeachment started off as being less popular than where it ultimately ended up? Totally. That's why I think you bring Don McGahn back. You bring Hope Hicks back. You bring every single witness who stonewalled them every single week from now until Election Day, and you remind them that this guy is a crook, that this guy obstructed justice, and remind them what's right, what's wrong, what democracy stands for. And if you don't do that, it's negligent on the part of these leaders,

and it's no different from them letting down local constituent issues. This is something that should matter to all Americans, but you have to remind them why it matters. All right. When we come back, OK Stop. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. And now it's time for OK Stop.

I want you all to know something. My energy is weird. I'm not giving you guys the clues and signals you need. So that's as much on me as it was anyone. Because I felt it as I said it. It's not my first time saying, now it's time for OK Stop, and yet you'd think it was.

Minutes after Robert Mueller finished his testimony, Donald Trump emerged from his pillow fort to yell at the press. And like all media geniuses, he did it in front of a helicopter whose blades were spinning at full fucking speed let's watch despite everything we've been through it's been an incredible two and a half years for our country the administration our president me we've done a great job we've got the strongest stock market the best unemployment numbers okay stop is. Is that a great metaphor for him? Just, it's a very funny bit of revealing language. Like, our administration, wait, I get more specific. The president, wait, me.

I am the president. Donald Trump. It's had nothing. And Trump. That's had nothing. And now they have less than nothing. And I think they're going to lose the 2020 election very big, including congressional seats, because of the path that they chose. Are you concerned you could be indicted out of office? You're fake news.

And you're one of the most. And let me just tell you, the fact that you even asked that question, you're fake news. And you're one of the most. And let me just tell you, the fact that you even asked that question, you're fake news. This whole thing has been, honestly, it's been collusion. It's been collusion. Okay, stop. That word has been sapped of all meaning in his mind. If someone asked me, hey, are you worried about being indicted after you leave this stage? I'd be like, now.

me, hey, are you worried about being indicted after you leave this stage? I'd be like, now? What words do you think still have meaning to him, though? Diet Coke, please. Ivanka. Yeah. With the media, it's been

collusion with other countries. This has been a disaster for the Democrats. I think Robert Mueller did a horrible job, both today and with respect to the investigation. But in all fairness to Robert Mueller, he had nothing to work with. Too many conjunctions in that sentence. I love a to be fair to Robert Mueller from Donald Trump. You know that what you're about to hear is going to be very fair. When Donald Trump says to be fair, what comes next is never, ever anything but right down the fucking middle, fair as you can be.

Be a builder. But if they don't give you the right materials, you're not going to build a very good building. Even among the fakers. I don't think there's anybody that would say he did well. I looked at your people. They're saying it was devastating for the Democrats. OK, stop. First of all, he's like, did I watch the hearings? No. I saw your coverage, your coverage, your coverage, your coverage. But he piggybacked on all the media pundits that he sees in the room because Donald Trump understands this media dynamic. He understands how the description

of how things play is what determines how things play. So he knows that a really effective strategy for him is not to say, I'm innocent. It's to get up there and say, this went poorly for the Democrats. This is something that didn't play well for the Democrats. It was a political disaster. It is going to cause them to lose. He is never happier than when he is getting to be a pundit on television. And one thing I'd also say is it was hard to watch him go out to this pre-helicopter takeoff press conference where he screams. the blades make it too loud to hear the question which i don't think is an accident but he comes out with fire in his belly and anger and righteous indignation which is obviously not real but it is how he seems and then you watch

the democrats walk up to that podium and just be like it was a very good day a lot of very important information was was given to us And while we continue to oppose impeachment, we're going to look very closely at it moving forward and be very angry and consider it quite deeply when you're not around. And some of us are going to have some soup after this. The options are minestrone and Yankee bean. That's a pretty good impression. That's a pretty good impression.

That's a pretty good impression. Can we talk about fakers? I've never heard fakers before. That's some new shit. So now it's not the fake news, but it's pervaded by the fakers. It's just spraying it out, y'all fakers. By the way, I think I could be wrong, but I feel like that was Yamiche Alcindor who was talking, and I feel like her, April Ryan, like that's the next level of loathing.

When the person asking the question is like an African-American woman. Like, I just feel like that's the lowest of the low on his totem pole. Well, yeah, it's the two overlapping Venn diagrams of people he doesn't believe should have a right to talk to him. Exactly. Women and black people. You put them together and he's like, you're going to question me? Oh, no. I'm a racist misogynist famously so this bothers me a lot because it's actually like a deep part of my psychological makeup a profile built over decades of racial thoughts and behavior at every phase of my life. One of the only places where you could find any consistency,

an antagonism towards women and people of color. It's at every point in my businesses and everything you can see about how I've run my businesses, from asking black employees to leave the floor of a casino, to grabbing women who didn't want to be grabbed, all the way up to how I've treated women today, right now, at this very moment. Didn't he say something like, if I walked into a room of my accountants and they were black, like something was wrong?

Is that my imagination? I feel like that was from the early days of Trump. He said he didn't want black people touching his money. He wanted short Jews with yarmulkes, I believe is what he said. That's what he said. What? What are you oohing?

That's an oldie but goodie. Touching his money. This is what happens, but this is why the Democrats come out to that podium feeling all sunken. It's like, on the one hand, you're like, I want to laugh at this, because it will make me feel better.

But on the other hand, you're like, this is not funny. Like, I can't, I have a hard time dealing with it. You know, the truth is, to not be so dour for a second, it's what we learned is what we knew all along, which was Robert Mueller wasn't coming to save us. He didn't have the answers. He couldn't make what I said jokingly

about big little lies is actually true of Robert Mueller. You know, he's been the archer and he's been the prey. But what we're dealing with here is the fact that like he can't make Democrats make the American people care about this. He can't do more than what he's already decided to do. He made a decision. He was going to lay out the he's already decided to do. He made a decision. He was going to lay out the facts. He laid out a case for obstruction of justice. His moral probity and sense of responsibility led him to the conclusion that not only did the OLC memo

make clear that Donald Trump couldn't be indicted by the Justice Department. The implication is, therefore, you cannot say, I would have indicted Trump but for the OLC memo, which is basically doing the same thing. If the memo says you can't indict a president, then the memo also, therefore, implies, in a sense of fairness, that you can't say you would have indicted the president, which is why, when Ted Lieu asks him, would you have indicted the president but for the OLC memo, and he says yes. It's because it's obviously true, but

he also can't say it. At every stage, Robert Mueller has been telling us to read between the lines. But you know what Americans aren't good at anymore? Connecting the fucking dots. And then it's because of Twitter and our phones. There's a dot,

we get distracted. There's another dot, we don't see the connection. When we come back, we'll play a game. Don't go anywhere. This is Love It or Leave It, and there's more on the way. That's a good question. The question was, does Trump ever go anywhere in the helicopter, or do they just turn it on and turn it off? I think he actually likes

to go on a ride in the afternoons. It's part of executive time. He likes to read tweets over the Capitol. It also helps Melania to put him down. You know?

The bumpiness. Yeah, the motion. The bumpiness. When he lived in New York, he used to just love sitting in the back of his limousine and driving around town.

Like, for decades, this is what he did. He just liked to drive around town so that it's moved to a helicopter feels like the natural progression of things.

Yeah, the natural progression of things in hell. The hell we live in. And we're back! Does anyone out there want to play a game? What's your name, sir? Rob Jackson. Rob Jackson, full name?

Robert Azeem Jackson III. Wow. There's a lot of confidence Rob Jackson, full name? Robert Azeem Jackson III. Wow. Wow. There is a lot of confidence coming from this area, Rob Jackson III. Now, before we start, I do need to ask you, did you sign the waiver? Yes, of course. You did? Okay, great.

Almost every week, a story breaks that makes us all wonder if all our data is gone forever. And we begin to feel like there's nothing we can do. So I thought it would be helpful to explore some of these stories every few weeks in a segment we're calling Saving Private Ryan, Don't Ask, Do Tell. Don't ask. Do tell. It's supposed to be sexy.

Can you give me direction? Yep. That is a recording of Travis saying the name of the game in a sexy voice, bailing midway through, but sort of keeping the sexy voice. And it was deeply weird, so he left it in.

He also sent it to me as a file that I didn't know was coming to my phone that just said, private sexy. Last week, the internet was ablaze with photos of you and your hilarious coworkers as old people. As someone who will never grow old, I found this disgusting. But then word spread that something nefarious was afoot. FaceApp, it seemed, might actually be a way for the Russian government to gather your photo data. The backlash was swift and the DNC warned all of its staffers not to use the app.

But as the dust settled and after we all downloaded then deleted the app, the truth became clear. FaceApp isn't uniquely terrible. In fact, you give the exact same permissions to scary companies and big companies you use every day all the time. And if you're worried they might use your private data to help empower Russian government interests, wait until you hear about Facebook. Just because privacy violations are routine doesn't mean they are fine, but we wanted to highlight just how much companies own your data, including, in fact,

Crooked Media. You see, when you all signed that waiver as you walked in today, you actually signed away a whole bunch of stuff to our company because you sign shit all the time and didn't really think about it. Everyone in here. Similarly, if you want to use FaceApp or Facebook, you have no choice but to accept their terms.

And so many companies make you sign agreements, you have to choose between participating in society and protecting your privacy. So we're going to see if you can guess which terms of service you've agreed to in a game we're calling Facebook FaceApp or FaceLoveIt. I'm going to read you some terms of service. If you think it's from Facebook, say Facebook. If you think it's FaceApp, say FaceApp. or Face Love It. I'm going to read you some terms of service. If you think it's from Facebook, say Facebook.

If you think it's Face App, say Face App. If you think it's one we got you to sign over to us tonight, all of you say Love It. You ready, Rob? Yes. Here we go, Rob. You grant the company a perpetual, irrevocable, non-exclusive, royalty-free, worldwide, fully paid, transferable license to use, reproduce,

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Lovett. Yes. Rob. I'm stressed out. You won the game. We won't... We probably won't keep your releases. You guys signed so many releases

without even thinking about it. So don't sign things people just put in front of you, you animals. Have some goddamn respect for yourself. We're not pawns of some giant corporation in another place. Equifax isn't the boss of us. We're the boss of Equifax.

Facebook lives and dies based on the fact that we participate in every day. We'll have power the second we decide we have power. Alright, we come back, the rant wheel. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. Now it's time for the rant wheel.

You know how it works. We'll spin the wheel and rant about the topic wherever it may land. This week on the wheel, we have 5 a.m. hearings, New York City falling apart, D.C. statehood, Equifax, Trump's food stamp cuts, carbs, Hope Hicks, and just another rant.

We'll see what it is. You know, it's a blank space. It's exciting. It's not that exciting. Let's spin the wheel. It has landed on New York City is falling apart. Listen, no here in Los Angeles. We don't give a shit.

We see water pouring down into the subways. We say, good. We find out that there's a blackout on the Upper West Side

of Manhattan. We say, fuck them. We hear about an additional blackout in Brooklyn that was maybe a controlled blackout

to prevent a larger blackout. We say to ourselves, what happened there? But still, we don't care. But New York City can't build a tunnel. It took them a decade to connect 60th Street to 50th Street on the Upper East Side. It would take a century to finish that line

all the way up Second Avenue if we ever get to it. Bill de Blasio's in Des Moines. Con Ed can't keep the lights on every time it hits 90 degrees. Half the apartments along Central Park are owned by oligarchs who use it as a place to store baseball cards. Somebody keep an eye on. Let's spin it again. It has landed on D.C. statehood. Suggested by Diallo.

Well, look, I mean, like, this is my rant, and I've felt it ever since I was a kid. I do not understand how you can have so many Americans being taxed without representation. I think it would never happen. Seriously. I think it would never happen if the population of D.C. was a bunch of white people. It would not happen for a second. It goes towards, you know, last week's episode when you were talking about love it or leave it,

that sort of innate sense of ownership that certain Americans have that a a lot of other americans do not like it just would never happen like you know five guys get mad in oregon and they take over like a rec center you know what i mean like they're like this is my country like you know i grew up in atlanta where like you have all these confederate aficionados who are just to this day they're like well they only rebelled against the country because they loved it so much i just think it's ridiculous that you have all these, you know, there are more people in D.C. than some states, at least Wyoming. You know, and I just think that's ridiculous. And it's the one thing I'm like, if I could push a button, even if it was like a sort of a compromise, even if they have to count towards like Virginia's total or Maryland's total, like they got to count towards somebody's total.

That's absurd. Well, but see, then they would actually get a senator. I'm one of those people who thinks the Senate is fundamentally broken. I've seen the charts that say, yeah, seriously. There are 22 states that equal so many senators, and then there's California. You guys have heard all this before. You guys are the high information people.

Here's the good news, though. Yes, California is underrepresented in the Senate. We have two senators for many millions of people versus the two senators that Wyoming or Idaho have. However, the thing about Dianne Feinstein is she has the strength of 40 men. I once saw Dianne Feinstein lift a VW bus. There wasn't even a kid underneath it. It wasn't adrenaline. She was just drunk. Let's spin it again.

I'm sorry. Real quick. Real quick. One more thing. Continue. 5 a.m. Harris. Real quick, I just want to say the best news, this actually cheered me up, because most news is a super downer to me, but I was so thrilled to hear Anna Wintour. I was so happy when she got asked a question about,

like, what do you think of the First Lady? She starts talking about Michelle Obama. And the reporter's like, oh, no, but what about the current occupant of the White House? And she's like, well, I just think Michelle Obama was such a nice... That's how you get Trump.

That's how you hurt him. Like, when high New York society lives... I mean, like, it's sad that that's what it takes to hurt the guy, but I'm convinced that those are the things that he actually cares about. Oh, oh, absolutely. It is actually amazing.

This is a man who's not wanted to work for it, not wanted to do what it takes to earn it, in fact has done everything he could to prevent himself from receiving it, but who desperately craves respect to fill the hole in his heart that is unfillable because he has a personality disorder,

but every moment of his life as he's gotten more wealth and more fame and lost his money and fought to get it back and taken his brand global and had a reality TV show and won Emmys and become more and more of a public figure, at every stage he's looked around and said, do I have Manhattan's respect yet? And they look at him and they say, absolutely not. And it must be so galling. Now you are the president of the United States.

You are the ostensible leader of the free world. And still, these Manhattanites look at you with disgust. Their noses, you can see into their nostrils. Their noses are turned up so high. It must be absolutely infuriating. He's waiting by the mailbox for his invite to the Met Gala. Wait, he proposed to Melania before

her first trip to the Met Gala. That is how important Condé Nast and Vogue and the Met Gala is to Trump. Ivanka Trump was offered a job at Vogue, allegedly, before she started working in real estate. Tiffany Trump interned at Vogue. So this kind of started working in real estate, Tiffany Trump interned at Vogue. So this kind of snub really does matter to the president.

I just want someone to hurt him. If it's Hannah Wintour, it's Hannah Wintour. I'll take it. I'll take it. Let's spin it again. It has landed on Matt's rant, whatever he wants it to be. This is so much pressure. I thought of it driving over.

If you own a pickup that has a heavy-duty axle and has two wide wheels on it, and it's got big-ass mirrors, and it might as well be burning coal, let's say. You have to, by law, put a sack of gravel in that thing once a week, or put a ladder in there on Saturday for the rest of your ownership of that vehicle. Otherwise, get a real car.

Dummy. You dumb dumb. Really. That's all. No. When I see a fucking TV producer driving onto Sunset Gower

in a F-150 designed to haul cement blocks. Yeah. With a trailer hitch that they've never used. And there's probably chains in the back in case they go through snow. When's the last time somebody in fucking L.A. drove through snow? Never.

You don't need four-wheel drive in L.A. Ever. Probably. Unless the shit goes down, fucking LA drove through snow. Never. You don't need four-wheel drive in LA. Ever. Probably. Unless the shit goes down, then you want that truck. And then you want that four-wheel drive. Yeah, we end up in a apocalyptic situation. The first two people in the back

of that F-150 are me and Matt. Take us somewhere safe, alpha man. Can you put my Chevy Volt in the back? I love her so much I'm gonna miss her My car plugs into a grid that no longer exists Take me to a place with water, you handsome, tall, burly man

I wasn't built to survive, ever It's a lark I've gone this long In a new government, we'll need jokes, right? I could make the king laugh. Here, hit me with something. That's your material.

Alright. Let's spin it again. Hit me with something. Hit me with something. All right. Let's spin it again. Hit me with something. It has landed on Hope Hicks. Emily. You ready? I'm so ready.

I have been raging about this for a week now, and I finally have an outlet, so thank you. I appreciate it. So last week, the Southern District of New York unsealed an application for a search warrant, and in that application, it was talking about the executed search warrant on Michael Cohen's apartment, office, and hotel room. And as part of it, it was an explanation

of the conversations that happened after the access hollywood tape was released and around the payments made to stormy daniels and karen mcdougall two women who had alleged affairs with the president though he has denied it in the application for the search warrant hope hicks called michael cohen and the president directly after the access hollywood tapes were president directly after the Access Hollywood tapes were released, directly after the Stormy Daniels story was set to come out in the Wall Street Journal, sent a series of text messages that said,

this isn't getting a lot of pickup. Continue to pray that this story about the president or the soon-to-be president having an affair with a porn star wouldn't come out. That's something that we should all pray about, obviously. The problem with this for Hope Hicks is that she testified to Congress saying that she had no advanced knowledge of any of this, which is a funny thing when you have a series of text messages and phone logs. What Congress decided to do, instead of holding her accountable, instead of prosecuting her for lying under oath to Congress,

which a number of people have been prosecuted for, including Michael Cohen. Michael Flynn was arrested and charged with lying to the FBI. Rick Gates was charged with lying to the FBI. What they decided to do for Hope Hicks was, we're going to let you do a redo. We're going to let you submit a new set of answers amending your testimony if you want. There's no justification for why she is given a redo other than the fact

that I think that she's a pretty woman who's close to the president. So members of Congress, if you're listening, Hope Hicks is in her 30s. She was the head of communications for the White House. She is the head of communications for a very big important public company here in Los Angeles she is not a damsel in distress she is someone who should be held accountable for her actions and she should not be just given a redo

yes let's spin it again. So it has landed on the Trump administration's proposal to cut food stamps. And I don't want to get too much into the weeds on this proposal, but basically what they're taking issue with is that while the law says generally you get food stamps if you're below 130% of the poverty line, there are some parts of the country in which there are some exceptions based on your eligibility for other programs that you may possibly be able to get help affording food up to 200% of the poverty line. This is unacceptable. This is too expensive. This is something we can't afford. For a family of four, being at 200% of the poverty line is roughly $50,000. That is not a lot of money for a lot of people to live on. And one of the problems that they're pointing out is,

wait, a lot of these families are able to get food help even though they have been able to accrue some assets. So in other words, the Trump administration that just passed with Republicans in Congress a tax cut that has increased the deficit to $1 trillion, which has given tax cuts to some of the biggest corporations in the country that have then used that money, already having so much cash on hand that they don't know what to do with. Companies, the biggest and most innovative companies in the world, with so much cash

on their books that they don't know how to invest the money and use it to make their companies bigger, and so therefore are taking that windfall from the federal government and using it to do stock buybacks, which is just an admission that they have so much cash they can't spend it, that they decided that that was worth increasing the deficit. The place where they think we can no longer afford to help people, the place where our budget is just too tight, is for people living between 130% and 200% of the poverty line,

barely getting by because sometimes occasionally they are not spending down to zero because they have the smallest amount of help that's allowing them to maybe get ahead just slightly right now. And it is truly despicable. And one thing that happened after the Trump rule came out is you saw an incredible amount of support for it, not just from the usual Trump supporters, but from your national reviews and your other conservative outlets that perform the backbone of the intellectual conservative movement. And it's a reminder that some of the more cruel and misguided and myopic policies didn't originate from Trump. This is Trump as an avatar

for the traditional right-wing idea that has gained so much purchase over the last decades. And when we see Trump on television yelling about AOC and Ilhan Omar, when we see him trying to divide Democrats, when we see him doing everything he can to sow chaos and division and get us to talk about everything else, remember that the reason that there are so many Republicans that back him is because he's doing their dirty work of trying to make sure taxes for corporations and rich people are very low and that we pay for it by cutting food stamps for some people in this country that have the least. And it is despicable and it is the kind of politics that they have been practicing since long before Trump came along. And it is the ultimate stakes of this election. It's not just about getting rid of Trump.

It's getting rid of the policies and politics that enable people like Trump. It is truly shameful for them to look at this country right now and say, what we need to do is give Apple more money to buy stock back while paying for it by taking food out of the mouths of families that are making $50,000 and therefore don't need the help. That's all. I'm going to spin it again. It has landed on 5 a.m. hearings. Listen, we've all been paying attention here in California, and maybe we don't have enough representation in Congress because of the vagaries of the Senate, as Diallo pointed out.

We only have two votes, even though we're a huge swath of the country, one of the biggest economies in the world. Just today, there was a deal out of California to make sure that the big auto companies produce more efficient vehicles, because even as the Trump administration is abandoning fuel regulations simply because anything Obama did was bad, California is fucking stepping up and making sure that we still do what we can to fight climate change. California is leading this country. And the least those ungrateful, overrepresented East Coast motherfuckers can do is start a hearing later than 5 a.m. Pacific time.

start a hearing later than 5 a.m. Pacific time. Hey, Jerry Nadler, I notice you don't ask for your fundraisers in Los Angeles to start at 5 a.m. They seem to start at a more reasonable hour. You could do us

a favor if you're going to come out to L.A. and take our money. Start that hearing at noon Eastern. We'll get up at 9. We won't like it. Let's face it, this town starts at 10 a.m. if you're going to come out to LA and take our money. Start that hearing at noon Eastern. We'll get up at 9. We won't like it. Let's face it, this town starts at 10 AM if you're lucky. Because there's one thing LA cares about. It's work-life balance.

Yeah. The NFL kicks off Sundays at noon. So that's very graceful to LA fans. Yeah. Yeah. It's a compromise. Obviously, 9 AM is not when people in California want to be watching men permanently damage their brains. But you can get up at 8, have a coffee, have a breakfast, walk your dog,

start your day, turn on the big game. And I think if the NFL, which is a group of feckless maniacs that care nothing for the health of their players and only for the bottom line, barely giving a shit about their fans, can manage to start a game at noon Eastern for the sake of people in California,

I think that Congress can provide us the same luxury. Most important hearing of the year. It's starting at 5 a.m. Pacific. What are you, nuts? You ever heard of the fucking... It's starting at 5 a.m. Pacific. What are you, nuts? You ever heard of the fucking, the Earth is round, people. It's a round goddamn planet. All right?

It's a round planet that's getting hotter every single day, which is why the people of California elected a super majority of Democrats who are doing the job you're not able to do. So show us some goddamn respect. I want to thank this incredible panel.

Emily Jane Fox, Diablo Riddle, Matt Walsh. I want to thank Nancy Pelosi, Ilhan Omar, and Jerry Nadler. Thank all of you for coming out. Thanks to the improv. Have a great night. and our head writer, Pokemon Huntress, Travis Helwig, and writers Jocelyn Kaufman, Alicia Carroll, and Peter Miller. Bill Lance is our editor, and Kyle Seglin is our sound engineer. Our theme song is written and performed by Sure Sure.

Thanks to our designers, Jesse McClain and Jamie Skeel, for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast, and to our digital producers, Narmel Konian and Yael Freed, for filming and editing videos each week so you can.