Lovett or Leave It - Brotherly Love in a Sandwich Town (Live from Philly!)

Episode Date: October 15, 2022

The (cheese)stakes are high when Lovett or Leave It fills Philadelphia’s Fillmore Theater with a night of gorgeous gay mayhem. Your future PA Governor Josh Shapiro sits down to discuss the “ugh” in Doug Mastriano. State Rep. Malcolm Kenyatta talks about building a queer coalition of anyone who wants to keep their rights in Pennsylvania. Taylor Swift’s publicist (Gill McGuire) stops by with some shocking intel about the pop star, and Jared Goldstein shares the Gay News with yinz. We close out the show with some Hot Takes, just in time for that chilly Midwestern 74-degree autumn to come sweeping in. For a closed-captioned version of this episode, click here. For a transcript of this episode, please email [e-mail] and include the name of the podcast. 

Hello, Philadelphia. Great to be back. Welcome to Love It or Leave It, live or else, coming to you from Philadelphia, the birthplace of America. And what I'm about to say, I mean as the highest of compliments. This is a city that dares to ask the question, what if Chicago was mean as hell? Ten out of ten sandwiches, no time wasted on manners. My kind of city. I really mean it, too.

It's an energy. Rude as hell, I love it. No pleasantries, unnecessary. We've got a great show for you tonight. Your next governor, Josh Shapiro, is here. State Rep Malcolm Kenyatta is here. He's going to join returning champ Jared Goldstein for gay news. It says here Taylor Swift's publicist is here.

I'm not sure what that's about. She might have some gay news too, though. Plus, Jill McGuire is here, and she'll join Jared and me for some hot takes. Because you're so thin. Plus, Jill McGuire is here, and she'll join Jared and me for some hot takes. Thank you. I want you to know something. I was going to talk about this later, but I want to talk about it now. I understand that Philadelphia is known for cheesesteaks.

I understand that. And they're good. And it's fine that you're known for that. But I think you're doing yourselves a disservice. Because this isn't a cheesesteak city. This is a sandwich city. And you're not getting enough credit for all the many other kinds of wonderful sandwiches available. It is rare to get a sandwich so good that you're like, I should be naked while I eat this.

It's not right to be in clothes. But first, let's get into it. What a week. At a Democratic fundraiser, President Biden warned that Russian President Vladimir Putin was not joking about the use of tactical nuclear weapons and that the risk of nuclear Armageddon is the highest it's been since the Cuban Missile Crisis. Yeah, I mean, it's not a cool thing to joke about, so that makes sense. If we're vaporized tonight, I want you all to know something. I'm glad I was here

and I died as I lived lying about wanting to be in Philadelphia. Boo. I don't care In honor of Russian President Vladimir Putin's 70th birthday on Friday The leader of Belarus presented him with a gift certificate for a tractor I hate it when you get the tractor gift card Either buy me the tractor or get me a gift card to the tractor store And let me pick out a tractor

It's just what I wanted, said Putin through gritted teeth buy me the tractor or get me a gift card to the tractor store and let me pick out a tractor. It's just what I wanted, said Putin through gritted teeth, having carefully left his catalogs open to the tanks page. Right there where the leader of Belarus would see it. Barnard College officials announced that the school will give students access to abortion pills next year, said the officials, we wouldn't want an unplanned pregnancy to disrupt the production calendar of unwatchable short films. Dwayne The Rock Johnson confirmed his run for presidency is officially off the table. It's for the best, he seems unbeatable, but then Dwayne The Paper Johnson shows up, and we've got a bloodbath on our hands. But then Dwayne the Paper Johnson shows up.

And we've got a bloodbath on our hands. Stupid. Now, if you'll indulge me, and you've done it so far, so why stop now? There is a pressing matter I would like to discuss here in the birthplace of America where the musty odor of founding fathers still hangs in the air. And I'm talking, of course, about the yassification of George Washington on the new quarter. I don't think it's news of which has not reached Philadelphia. So you see the original. Wow. Here to discuss it, we'd like to invite out friend of the pod, Jared Goldstein, to help us unpack some questions we have about the founding fathers. Give it up for Jared. Hi, Jared.

Hi. Hi. Hi. How are you? Hello. Can we talk about George Washington's Adam's apple? Yeah. Oh, we can talk about it.

That throat. Oh, my God. Wow. So, first question for you, Jared. Okay. Are you getting taller? What the fuck? No, these shoes are really...

God damn it. I'll stand far away. No, it's good. It's fine. I don't draw steam from being tall or not. Jared, my first question about the new George Washington is, would you? I would. Wow, okay.

I would. Look, I'm not hard to would, you know? No shade to George Washington, but he looks good. He looks good. All right. This led us to an idea, because obviously we're here in Philadelphia, where they met, and I don't remember the details, but they got together in some of the buildings around here. They broke a bell, and they made something.

Now, we're going to go through all of them, but we're going to go through both their representations and those that have played them. Next up, Jared. Okay. John Adams. First, we have the portrait by Mather Brown. We have the Paul Giamatti

performance in John Adams. We have William Daniels. Yeah, you gotta get real close. And then we have the portrait by Gilbert Stewart. Can I get to yes on any of these from you? Okay, first of all, do you know what the Founding Fathers is short for? No, do you know what the Founding Fathers is short for?

No, Jared. What's the Founding Fathers short for? The Founding Fathers of the United States. I learned that. Stupid horse shit. I learned it. What do you think? Giamatti in his prime? I can say I would not.

On any level. Any iteration. Not even William Daniels? He was in Boy Meets World later. Is John Adams a beer? Sam Adams, right. Give me a couple Sam Adams and then I'll be ready for John. Yeah, yeah. I'm always five Sam Adams away from being okay with John Adams.

Wait, you said William went on to... I think William Daniels became Mr. Feeney. Oh my God. So like maybe. Okay, I'll change Daniels became Mr. Feeney. Oh, my God. So, like, maybe. Okay, I'll change my answer. I would. All right.

Next up, we have Thomas Jefferson, famously a founding father. He wrote the Declaration of Independence. Also owned a nailery in which he enslaved children who made nails in the blistering heat. A true monster. Yeah. Also a founding father. Complicated figure.

I guess. We have the Rembrandt peel portrait. We have Daveed Diggs. Sure. I don't know about that Sally Hemings movie. Sam Neill. Jurassic Park Sam Neill, maybe. Oh, wow.

And Nick Nolte. That's a pass. Okay, I'm toxic. This is a, I would on every level. Okay, that's good to know. That's why we're doing this. Thomas Jefferson, he's hot. He is hot. I was

in preparation, I was Googling Thomas Jefferson Young. Uh-huh. And then zooming into paintings. Thomas Jefferson Young. Yeah, there's no old pictures on the IMDb. Yeah, yeah.

So you got to go deeper. There's something about him. He looks good. Yeah, no, look. Look, I get it. I get it. I get it. All right, next up, we have Samuel Adams.

Whoa. Oh, okay. Yeah. Ben Barnes in Sons of Liberty. Sure. Whoa. Sure. He can crack my Liberty Bell. You know what I mean? I don't know what that means. It's a butthole thing. It's a butthole thing. It was a butthole thing. There's also the beer. That's also part of it. Yes. There's a portrait by John Singleton Copley. And then there's the Sam Adams just on the logo of the beer. You got to get real close. He looks very, um, that's, I'm sorry. You're telling me that on the Sam Adams bottle, the person holding up a beer and cheersing is Paul Revere?

Was that an accident? What are you talking about? Why? One of you, the most confident. You know who you are. Sam Adams beer bottle has Paul Revere on the cover. Yes or no? It's you.

You're the most confident. Why? Because Sam Adams was too ugly. That must have been an uncomfortable conversation with Sam Adams, given that it's his fucking company. Because of technology. So the look, right, obviously they didn't have photographic beer printing when Sam Adams was alive. That's smart. I was stupid.

You're smart. So at some point down the line, they were like, now here's a question. Once you decided you're not going to use Sam Adams, you actually don't need to go to a founding father. You can just use any fucking face. But they went with Paul Revere because he was famously hot. So

what do you think? Would you fuck Paul Revere, it turns out? In a Sam Adams costume? No. No. Eat you fuck Paul Revere, it turns out? In a Sam Adams costume? No. No. Eat shit, Paul Revere. One if by night, two if by sea, none if by us. But obviously, look, Ben Barnes, come on. Yeah.

Come on. What are we doing here? And finally, we have Alexander Hamilton, played by Lin-Manuel Miranda or Javier Munoz. We have Rufus Sewell and John Adams. And we have the portrait by John Trumbull. You know, all bodies are beautiful, even Alexander Hamilton. Yeah. Here's the thing. The problem I have with Rufus Sewell is that he always plays a horrible villain. Where else is he in? I don't know.

He's a Nazi in that show where they're like, what if? I know what it's called. I would not. I wouldn't. We're out.

We're out on Hamilton. I'm saving my virginity. For Thomas Jefferson. For Thomas Jefferson. Yeah. Any closing thoughts? Not one. Benjamin Franklin, yes or no?

Benjamin Franklin, yes. Yeah, easy. That's an easy one. Why not? Why not? He's making cool chairs and glasses. He's so famous. He's getting struck by lightning.

You're nursing him back to health. He's telling fascinating stories about Paris. Exactly. Jared Goldstein, everybody. That episode of The Office? That episode of The Office. Jared Goldstein, everybody. That episode of The Office? That episode of The Office. Jared Goldstein, everybody. He'll be back. Thank you. Thank you, Jared.

What a phenomenal interlude. A New York City man has been charged with smuggling three Burmese pythons in his pants across the U.S.-Canadian border. Is that three Burmese pythons in your pants or are you just happy to see me? Either way, Jesus. A couple points. One, it's not smuggling if that's where they live. Also, look, this guy seems weird, but he puts his pants on like everybody

else, one snake at a time. The asteroid that killed the dinosaurs 66 million years ago also triggered a staggering tsunami up to 2.8 miles high according to a new study. Skinny legs, terrible swimmers, destined to drown when the oceans rise. Creationists think they're just big lizards. What else do I have in common with dinosaurs?

The Northeastern University School of Law in Massachusetts has apologized for accidentally sending acceptance letters To thousands of current and former applicants Really tough They also apologized for telling the students That they loved them before they were ready Wasn't meant to be

Fox News host Greg Gutfield Complained on air that college students aren't hot anymore, saying this. And last, college doesn't look like it's fun anymore. I mean, have you seen a lot of them, how miserable and how miserable looking a lot of the students are? They're deliberately like uglifying themselves. You see them on TikTok. They're out of shape. They're asexual.

They're like rejecting. They're rejecting the truth and beauty. They all look like rejects from a loony bin. I'd steer clear of college too. Oh man, what a shame. These fucking teens aren't doing enough to get Greg Gutfield turned on. Teens, what are you doing at college?

Greg Gutfield doesn't want to fuck you anymore. He's scrolling through TikTok late at night, doesn't see a single teen or early 20s person he wants to fuck. That's a big problem. It makes him not even want to go to college anymore as a 58-year-old man. Weird fucking culture Fox News is. The woke police are making me not want to fuck these teens.

Oh, what a world. The National Gallery of Art has confirmed that one of its four paintings attributed to Vermeer is not, in fact, by Vermeer. The painting Girl with a Flute had already been in the subject of controversy after Lizzo offended online conservatives by looking at it.

But to be fair, it's pretty close. It's what art experts call a vernier. Shut it all down. That's it. This is our last episode. And finally, Pebbles, a toy fox terrier and the world's oldest dog, has died at age 22. I'll never forget the last thing I said to Pebbles. Happy 22nd birthday.

Here, I made you this big chocolate cake. And a tough transition. Here we go. When we come back, your next governor. All right, we're back. Here to give this show some much-needed credibility, it's your current attorney general and your next governor, Josh Shapiro. Hey, everybody.

How are you? Hey, John. Thank you for being here. How are you? I'm good. Hi, gang. Thank you. Thank you.

Wait, so I'm the guy that's giving us credibility here? Yeah, you absolutely, 100%. Got it. 100%. Good to be with you. Wait, so I'm the guy that's giving us credibility here? Yeah, you absolutely, 100%. Got it. 100%. Good to be with you. Welcome to the Fillmore in Philly. Happy to be here. What a delight.

All right, let's get into it. Your opponent has called for fasting and prayer until Election Day. That's right. In the hopes that God will save his failing campaign. 40 days. Are you worried at all that this strategy is going to work? Like, if it does, fuck, right? Like, we've learned a lot, and we won't like it.

All bets are off then, right? No, man, look, whatever he believes in, he believes in. I did join him for a day of fasting last week. I would not recommend that for 40 days. Nice. I'll tell you that. But he's different, and he's super dangerous and really, really extreme, and not someone that Pennsylvania should trust their vote with for governor.

I'll tell you that much. So, you know, we've got these radical candidates running all over the country, these MAGA people, and I think this is a signal example. When you're running against someone as extreme as Mastriano, someone who has said outlandish things about COVID, someone who has taken extreme positions on abortion, on LGBT issues, on democracy, who was literally at the insurrection, opposes marijuana to criminalization. You go on and on. How do you drill down on the simplest, best argument against someone like that when they're

making strange headlines all the time and you're trying to figure out the best case? Yeah, it's harder than you'd think because he gives you a lot of material to work with. But here's the bottom line. Unless you think like him, unless you pray like him, unless you marry like him, unless you worship like him, unless you look like him, he doesn't think you should count. He doesn't think your views matter, and he doesn't think you should sit around the table of progress. Here's my view. No matter what you look like, where you come from, who you love, or who you pray to, you belong in Pennsylvania, and I want to be your governor. I like that. I don't know why this specific example really got to me

but he gave this absurd speech where he talked about getting pole dancing out of elementary schools something we were unaware of not as big a problem as I didn't realize having come to discover it is a big problem and I remember seeing that

and just being struck by this sort of the noise and chaos and nonsense coming out of so many of these Republican campaigns. And it's like, hey, man, this is a job about paving a fucking road. Like, what are you going to actually do? How do you strike a balance between making sure people in the Commonwealth understand just how dangerous this person is while actually building a case for what you want to do so you have a mandate on day one. Look, every day I travel all across Pennsylvania. Today I was in the city of Philadelphia all day, and tomorrow I'm going to be in rural counties across northeastern Pennsylvania. And I talk about the same four basic things. Every Pennsylvanian has a right to a great quality public education. Second,

they got a right to make sure their kids walk to and from schools on safe streets. And third, we got a right to make sure that our economy lifts everybody up, including those who have been forgotten and left behind for a whole long time. And then finally, fourth, we have a right to the fundamental freedoms that we've come to rely on

for so long, including the right for women to be able to control their own bodies. And that's, I got to tell you, that's what I focus on day in and day out. He focuses on trying to take away our fundamental freedoms. I try and focus on protecting. Listen, it ain't real freedom to tell women what they're allowed to do with their bodies. It's not. And it's not freedom to tell our tell women what they're allowed to do with their bodies. It's not. And it's not freedom to tell our children what books they're allowed to read. It's not freedom to tell someone they can work a 40-hour work week, but they can't be a member of a union. And it sure as hell isn't freedom to say, y'all can go vote, but he's going to pick the winner.

That's not freedom. going to pick the winner. That's not freedom. So every day we talk about creating real opportunity for folks, great schools, safe communities, great economy that lifts everybody up and protecting real freedom. And that's what's on the ballot here. So he can go out and say all kinds of wacky things every day about elementary pole dancing or whatever thing he was talking about. But the bottom line is I'm going to stay focused on trying to make Pennsylvania's lives better each and every day. So if everybody does what they're supposed to do and you win this race, which is what will happen if everybody does what they're supposed to do. Y'all going to do what you're supposed to do? There you go. As governor, what can you do to get the word out that Philadelphia isn't just a cheesesteak town? And we love cheesesteaks,

but it's a sandwich town. Not enough people understand this. And honestly, and this obviously is not something I, I did not know I was going to say this until today. Uh-oh. I'm prepared to say it's a better sandwich town than Chicago. There you go. I'm saying it's better,

and I'm going to say it's better than New York. There you go. And obviously it's better than L.A. L.A. doesn't know how to make a sandwich. But people don't know. Obviously I think it's been a failure of both parties for a long time. What can you do as governor to kind of make sure people understand

that you guys are doing things with sandwiches that people don't know about? Well, they're wet and it's good. It's a good wet. That doesn't happen all the time. In other places you open it up and it's wet and you's good. It's a good wet. That doesn't happen all the time. In other places you open it up and it's wet and you say no. Philadelphia you say sweet. Yeah, I don't know that there is

such a thing as a good wet when it comes to a sandwich, John. And you know what? He'll also tell you the things you don't want to hear. I'll give you that, man. I'll tell you what. I'll take a Wawa sandwich over any sandwich anywhere in the United States.

So, when you and John Fetterman made a deal with the devil to have the best possible opponents possible, what did you give up? What promise did you make to Satan himself that in a fucking tough year you'd be up against these super quacks from New Jersey. Can I get away with it?

No comment on that one? Sure, fine, fine. Sure. They are unique, aren't they? And they are special. It's unbelievable. New Jersey is not sending their best. I'm from New Jersey.

That's New Jersey energy. That's why they're doing so poorly. At the national level, people are really focused on your race, because obviously we've seen what happens when you have an extremist running a state when people are denying elections. There's been a big focus on the race for the Senate. Can you talk a little bit about, for people that may not have heard as much, about the race to flip the legislature and why that's on the table right now and what a strong turnout for the governor's race, for the Senate race can do to help kind of make change here? Let's look at the world post-Dobbs for a minute. Dobbs says that no longer will there be

federal protection for women across this country, that abortion will be left up to the states. And it's one of the issues I get asked about and talk about day in and day out. By the way, wherever I am, rural, urban, suburban communities. And the bottom line is we have to talk about the reality, and that is that this legislature, which we have in Harrisburg right now, keeps putting abortion bans on the desk of the governor. Thankfully, our governor keeps vetoing it. And I have vowed to veto any bill that undermines a woman's right to choose here in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

And so we talk about that from a defensive posture, similar to when they put the bill on my desk to make Pennsylvania a right-to-work state and do away with unions. I'll veto that bill as well. But boy, oh boy, if we had a legislature that actually allowed us to play some offense, where we could pass non-discrimination laws in Pennsylvania, for example, where we could raise the minimum wage to at least $15 an hour, where we could invest more in public education, ensure that we have a mental health counselor and vo-tech back in our schools. Imagine what we could invest more in public education, ensure that we have a mental health counselor and vote tech back in our schools. Imagine what we could do if we could play some offense. Now, I know how to work with Republicans, but it'd be great if we had, for example, Joanna McClinton as the first black woman speaker in the history of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

And I'd love to see that happen. I'd love to be able to play some offense. And I'm going to partner up with our legislators who are running in tough races around the Commonwealth to see if we can do that. Like Lisa Barasky. Lisa Barasky, who's here, who I saw today, got

dozens of people coming out on a Saturday morning to knock on doors. So incredible enthusiasm. Flip that district. It's really cool. Lisa's doing a great job. Yeah. Before we let you go, you've graciously agreed to see if this audience understands the stakes

as well as we do. To be clear, I've not agreed to anything. He hasn't agreed to anything. But I feel... That's true, actually. Yeah. He hasn't agreed to a damn thing. So we'll see what you're proposing. And I'm proposing it, and he's not a part of this. Then he has the deniability he needs.

That's right. That's right. Which is important. That is important. Especially nowadays, with everything that's going on. All right, well, so now it's time for a game we're calling Pole Dancing for Democracy. A title he did not approve...

Thank you all very much. A title he did not approve. Thank you all very much. A title he did not approve or know about. This segment is designed to be both educational and to fill you with the proper level of rage. Your next governor and I will trade off asking questions, and if you'd like to tackle a question, please raise your hand. Kendra is in the house and will come around. I'll kick it off.

Last week, Doug Mastroianno vowed to remove what he called graphic pornographic books and pronoun games from schools. What else did he pretend is a problem in public schools so he could say he'd remove it, even though no one actually believes this is an issue, because most people aren't trapped in a Facebook fever dream. CRT? So close.

But it was pole dancing, and... Never have seen someone whiff harder on something they were given to the answer to five fucking times. Way to go. Thank you so much. It was literally on the screen. We talked about it moments earlier. But you know what? We're easing into it.

Mr. Attorney General, the next question is yours. All right. So my opponent, who, as you know, participated with the mob in the violent insurrection on January 6th to try to stop your votes from being counted, announced an election integrity plan which would require all Pennsylvania voters to do what? Whoever's jumping up the most right now.

You seem to be jumping up a lot. You have fingers waving in the air. Hi, what's your name? Hi, my name is Elizabeth and I believe he's going to require all of us to re-register. That's right. Yes. Imagine he wants you all to have to go

down to the DMV and re-register. Who wants to do that? All right. Sounds like you're not for that plan. It's not a great plan and also it does capture what is for Republicans the ideal moment, which is a moment where there are zero people registered to vote. There you go.

Next question. In response to accusations of anti-Semitism, Doug Mastriano has pointed to a man named Pastor Don who does what before some of Doug Mastriano's events? What do you think? What's your name? Paul. Paul. What happens?

Pole dancing. Pole dancing. You're doing bits? Paul. You're doing bits? That's not the answer. That's's your name? Paul. Paul. What happens? Pole dancing. Pole dancing. You're doing bits? Paul. You're doing bits? That's not the answer. That's not the answer, Paul. Oh, that person seems to think they know.

Paul was trying to be funny. He blows a shofar. That's correct. Yes. That's right. Yes. Famously, the blowing of the shofar cures antisemitism within a 500-yard radius. People don't know that.

They don't, no. People don't talk. It's scientific. It is science. Yeah. It is science. It's all science. All science.

All right. All right. My opponent has tried to obscure the timeline of his extreme abortion beliefs, but there's only so far he can run from the interview he gave to WITF, which is an NPR station in central PA, in which he said women who get an abortion should be charged with murder. What year did he give this interview? It was not the 1800s. Though he sometimes dresses like it's the 1800s. Well, that's another topic. We should ask about that.

We'll get to it. We'll get to it. John, call on somebody. Hi, what do you think, sir? This year, 2022's another topic. We should ask about that. We'll get to it. We'll get to it. John, call on somebody. Hi, what do you think, sir? This year, 2022. So close. So close. It was 2019. 2019, he said that.

But you did great. Seriously, folks, he wants to not only ban abortion, with no exceptions, not for rape or incest or to save the life of the woman, he wants to then charge her with murder. That's what we're up against here in this election. That's why you need to vote. That's why you need to vote.

And I do think, like, look, we're... I think it's important that we try to find joy in this slog when we're facing these really extreme and terrible people. That's why I'm doing this show. That's why he's here. This is all about the joy. He doesn't want to be here. He's doing this for you. But I do think

sometimes like there's this like, oh, you know, Doug Mastriano is so extreme. It's going to be fine. It's going to be fine. Republicans are going to turn out. They're going to turn out like crazy. Like this is real. This is serious. If he wins, this is really on the table. And I don't believe a single poll that says it won't be close and neither should you. And everybody should act like it's going to be close, especially because every person you turn out, not only will help elect this governor, but in your district will help elect a state representative that could help flip the legislature, that'll help make sure we keep the Senate. So we're in the final home stretch here, and I'm stopping mid-game to say this.

A lot of people have signed up, but a lot of people haven't. You have to go to Vote Save America. If you haven't yet, that's fine. If you haven't signed up yet, that's fine. But now you have to. We're in the last three to four weeks of this thing. A bunch of people are just starting to pay attention. They don't know about Doug Mastriano.

They don't know about Josh Shapiro yet. They're just tuning in. And you can be at their door, and you can be on their phone, and you can be the person that helps them understand the stakes. Because the news isn't going to tell them. The ads are going to try to lie about it. Fox News is going to try to lie isn't going to tell them the ads are going to try to lie about it fox news is going to try to lie about it mastriano is going to try to lie about it so you have to go door to door and you have to tell your neighbors what the stakes are because every single person needs to sign up we have to show up like we

did in 2020 to show up like we did in 2018 that's right that's right i'm sorry i was overcome no no no i'm just trying to process the fact that people are just tuning in to learn about me and it's on this show. Listen, yeah, it's tough. This is why you got to go to, yeah. Yeah, okay. They're getting a good sense. I think it's good.

No, but you raise an important point. I know I'm getting us off the cue cards here, which is somewhat by design. John's right, but in all sincerity, just showing up tonight and feeling good and thinking about politics, it's not enough. Just posting something on Instagram or TikTok or whatever, it's not enough. We are not far from where our democracy was born 246 years ago. And if you look at the story of our American democracy, And if you look at the story of our American democracy, it's been ordinary Americans rising up, demanding more, seeking change, pursuing a more just society, looking at their kids and grandkids and saying, I want to make this place a little better for you than the way I found it.

And the way that happens is by organizing, mobilizing and voting. You know, my name may be on the ballot, but it's your rights and futures that are on the line right now, and it's our democracy at stake, and we need you in the game with us participating and voting. I really need you. I really need you. So I think that's going to be a great note to leave it, so I'm going to ask one final question to the crowd, which is this. In August, the internet was treated to a photo of Doug Mastriano. It is from 2013 to the 2014 school year. Please note that the Civil War ended in 1865 and we won. What was Doug Mastriano wearing in the photo? Seems like a lot of people know the answer. Hi, what's your name? Molly. What was he wearing in the photo?

A Confederate soldier uniform. That's right. That's right. And you know what? I guess what I would say is once an insurrectionist, always an insurrectionist. I mean, listen, Molly, you got the answer right. But think about this for a minute. This is a guy who has a grown-ass man, not as part of some reenactment, on the grounds of the U.S. Army

War College, chose to wear the uniform of the Confederacy. That's the uniform of the traitors. These are the folks that went to war to defend slavery. And that's who he chose to recognize by wearing that uniform. Hey, Maya Angelou told us, when someone tells you who they are, believe them. This guy has shown us who he is. We got to believe him, and we got to vote. We got to vote. Your next governor, Josh Shapiro.

Thank you so much. Thanks, everybody. Thanks. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. The BTS army. Swifties. The K-Hive.

The broken parasocial deviants who actually care about the inner workings of an institution known as the Try Guys. Good fans care, great fans obsess, and the truly top flight fans, well, they have intricate theories. Anyway, if you've ever said anything even mildly critical of Taylor Swift, and not just online, but like to a friend at a restaurant, you know that Swifties are everywhere and not fans with whom one should trifle. Thankfully, one need not trifle, as she is, according to our trusty Love It or Leave It style guide,

perfect, because I worry for my family's safety. And Taylor has a new album dropping this month, which has convinced a certain devout segment of her fan base, known as Gaylor, that the release will coincide with another special announcement. That's right. Here to address the rumors,

please welcome a representative from Taylor Swift's PR team. It's right. Here to address the rumors, please welcome a representative from Taylor Swift's PR team. It's Helen LaCroix. Hi, Helen. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you for having me, John. As you all know, Taylor Swift's 10th studio album, Midnights, comes out October 21st. Okay, so we're just going to get right into it. Midnight's comes out October 21st. Okay, so we're just gonna get right into it. Sure, John. Well, Taylor is so grateful to all of her fans and she wants you all to know that she's seen the posts and she's aware of the conversation and she wants to put some of the speculation to rest. It's true that Taylor has had some feelings that she hasn't been able to express.

Go on. And Midnight's isn't all that's coming out on October 21st. Oh my god, it's happening. Is it happening? Can't believe it's real. Taylor Swift is actually coming out of the closet? Oh yes, she will be coming out of the closet, all right. As gay? Not quite. Bisexual? No, but she does want to go another way. This month, at long last, Taylor Swift will be coming out as fascist. What?

I'm sorry. I don't think I heard that right. I think you said pansexual? Fascist. Mussolini, book burnings, military parades. And she's so excited to finally connect with her fans as her full, authentic self. Let's hear it for Taylor coming out of her fascist closet. Make some noise. Don't make some noise, you animals. Don't just clap because someone told you to.

Helen, I have to say, I did not see this coming. I don't think anyone did, and Taylor Swift fans are notorious for poring over every little clue she gives them and also a lot of clues that she does not. It's like QAnon, but kind of cute. It's Q-anon. I know. It turns out most people aren't very talented symbologists, John. Hold on.

Symbology is not real. That's a made-up thing from the Da Vinci Code. Well, maybe that's why everyone sucks balls at it. Okay. We thought we were being painfully obvious about Taylor's closeted fascism. The hints were all

right there in plain sight. Her album covers, her lyrics. In the song Wildest Dreams, for example, I said, no one has to know what we do. Right. That's a good example. The gaylers, the predominantly queer, mostly female Taylor Swift fans who are convinced she's secretly gay,

think that's a reference to doing gay stuff and keeping it a secret. It's about dismantling the decadent institutions that have gone woke, John. Our countries, like China China will eat our lunch. Democracy is weak, John. And people have been bribed by big government to vote Democrat, and the result is chaos in the classroom

and blood on our streets. God, it's so obvious. It's not obvious at all. What about in the song Dancing With Our Hands Tied? Mm-hmm. I loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us. Come on, that sounds kind of gay. That song is about Marine Le Pen.

Come on. I don't think that's right. See, and this is why Taylor resisted coming out for so many years. This exact judgment and lack of acceptance that you're giving off right now. First of all, please stop saying coming out in reference to right-wing radicalization. Harvey Milk is spinning in his grave and he keeps bumping into the disco ball. Second, she should be judged for this. That's just your bigoted opinion. Okay, but do you at least see where the Gaylors were coming from? Taylor really did seem to be dropping a ton of breadcrumbs.

She wore a blue, purple, and pink wig in the music video for You Need to Calm Down. She wore a bisexual pride flag wig. That was meant to pay tribute to the flag of Hungary. Okay. Come on. Taylor has great admiration for Victor Orban and his immigration policies. No.

That doesn't seem right. The Hungarian flag is red, white, and green. It's horizontal Italy. It was a subtle nod, John. The people who got it, got it. Like how when she sang exile and all the right people understood it was in reference to closing the borders until we figure out what's going on. Wait a second. Come on, Helen. This just makes so much less sense than Taylor Swift being queer. What about her intense, quote, friendship, end quote, with Karlie Kloss that seemed to fall apart for no clear reason? What about the lyrics that fans thought referenced Glee star Diana Agron?

You've all been so blind. Diana didn't date Taylor. Diana just introduced Taylor to 4chan. Okay. And Karlie Kloss, well, she was just a tool, a useful idiot. Taylor was using her

to get closer to the Kushners. But Helen, if Taylor Swift was secretly a fascist, why would she have denounced Donald Trump in 2020? It alienated a lot of her fans.

It made her a target of right-wing media. She must have felt strongly about it. She did feel strongly that he just wasn't going far enough, fast enough. Trump's uncouth, and that has value, but he was so undisciplined. She believed it was only when Kamala Harris could use Biden as a socialist puppet to legalize weed, trick kids into being trans, and hike up gas

prices that the real patriots of this country, the people who actually deserve to be here, would rise up. I have to say, it kind of sounds like you're fascist too. I don't love that term because I think some people associate it with some excesses from the past. But sure, after all, that's how Taylor and I met. Wait, where did you, you weren't, you weren't both. Yes. Taylor and I were both at the Capitol on January 6th. Come on, come on. This is shocking. Taylor Swift was at the insurrection. It's like none of her fans even knew Taylor Swift at all. Yeah, fucking exactly. My dude, maybe Taylor is bisexual. Maybe Taylor is Demi Giamatti sexual, which means she is only sexually attracted to someone

if A, she's developed an emotional bond, and B, it's Paul Giamatti. You only know a version of her, the version she shows you. Right, but so many people feel like they know her and love her. Sure. But Taylor isn't just famous. She's rock star famous. Her life is so different and disconnected, her existence so strange and surreal, that the only way to relate to her fans, the normal people, the Volk, if you

will. Nope, we're not saying Volk, just make your fucking point. You mostly just see what she wants you to see. That doesn't make her bad, and it doesn't make her fans dupes, but it doesn't mean you know a version of a person that's created on some level to be relatable, and then people relate to that person. Yeah, I mean, I guess maybe Taylor will come out, which would be awesome,

but it's kind of sad and revealing that people are so starred for gay and queer role models and stars, so hopeful to have someone at this level that experiences love and attraction like they do, like we do, that they'll try so hard to see it, whether or not it's even there. That's exactly what J.K. Rowling said to Taylor just last week. Okay, this sucks. Go get back in your Uber. Helen LeCroy, everybody. Midnight's out on October 21st. Look what you made me do was about the Night of the Long Knives.

Bye. Get out of here. Get out of here. Thank you so much to Helen LaCroix. Everybody, give it up for Jill McGuire. Thank you so much for being here. We come back. Malcolm Kenyatta. That was great. Thank you. And we're back.

That was great. Thank you. And we're back. Here to talk about the future of a Mastriano-free Pennsylvania, it's your state representative, Malcolm Kenyatta. How are you? We've been having some fun. We've been having fun. Good to see you. This is it.

It's good to see you. Good to be seen rather than viewed, as they say. Better to be seen than viewed, I think. That's what the saints say, John. Yeah. Famously. Do you agree with me? This is a sandwich town, not a cheesesteak town.

You see what I'm saying? This is a cheesesteak town. It's a cheesesteak town. Okay. So, a lot of the national focus. Thank you. Thank you. I'm used to getting the fewest votes Hey

Hey Come on So a lot of the national focus As we were just talking has been on the governor's race And the senate race But for people listening there's a real opportunity this year To take back the legislature Can you just talk a little bit about opportunity this year to take back the legislature.

Can you just talk a little bit about why this year in particular gives us a chance to flip the legislature for the first time in a number of years? Yeah, so we have a chance to flip the state house because of redistricting. You know, this was, I heard Josh mention our incredible future Speaker of the House, Joanna McClinton. And she and Jay Costa, you know, went through and actually got us like a fair map. I don't know, it's this crazy idea where like voters could pick their elected officials and not their elected officials pick their voters. I know. Crazy concept. I know, I know. So last month, you and a number of other LGBTQ politicians announced the formation of something called the Agenda Pack to defend the queer community from right-wing politicians. We've seen this rising right-wing threat. Can you talk a little bit about what the goal is and what you're trying

to do with this organization? Listen, so our goal is to wake up every day, have a glass of water, and then beat bigots everywhere that we can. You got to drink water. You got to get up. You got to drink a whole glass of water. First of all, you got to have water because you got to be hydrated. Wake up. Wake up. Just drink a glass of water. Don't do anything else. First thing you do,

you drink a whole glass of water. It changes your whole life. It really does. It really will change your life. It really does. You know, because you have these folks you think about Doug

who's obviously a big target for us because he's awful in every possible way including saying things like kids who are being put through conversion abuse. I

don't call it therapy because there's no therapeutic nature to it. He says that these kids are just confused. And our governor right now, Governor Tom Wolf, has used his executive authority to do everything he can to make it more difficult to engage in that type of behavior. He could, with a stroke of a pen, move us in the other direction. I think you had on recently Will Rollins, who's running in California's 41st district against a guy who now that Palm Springs is in his district, he loves gay people. Suddenly. I know. Didn't like it for a very long time.

But Palm Springs does that to people. Maybe he went and like it changed him. You know, the clean air, the hummingbirds, it does that. His book about that is called Eat, Pray, Hate. Because he sucks. That's right. Then he stayed at the Sparrow and everything changed. That's a specific hotel. I'm so sorry.

You're from Philadelphia. You've never seen the sun. Wow, we object. It rained here for five days when I got here. What are you people doing? Get it together. Well, it's always sunny. Oh, right. That's a joke.

You understand that it's always sunny in Philadelphia is a joke. That's why it's called that. It's not true. It's a pessimistic. It's kind of the ethos of the show. I don't know if you've seen an episode. They're not very sunny, are they? Kind of gets at the idea. It's a gray place. A place with clouds.

Well, it's nice to see you on my last visit to Philadelphia. No, come back. But next time when you come, come to my district. You're like two blocks outside of my district. Great. So when you come, we'll do it at the Met, and then you're right in my district. Talk to me about the... Okay, I mean, that sounds fancy.

Talk to me about the sandwiches. What are we looking at? What kind of sandwiches can I get in your district? That's why I'm here. I come for sandwiches. I travel for the food. Honestly, you can get a good sandwich all across Philadelphia. But this is what I will say.

When people come here and they want a cheesesteak in particular, everybody picks a big-name cheesesteak place, and they tell you to, like, go to that cheesesteak place. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. You go to the tell you to like go to that cheesesteak place no no no no no no no no no no no you go to the corner store you go to the corner bodega okay you just find the most like corner store looking corner store and you walk in and you go to the back and the guy's behind the glass it's like baloney at the bottom and he's kind of listening to you but not really listening to you and you have to like fight to get your order out and he's kind of listening to you, but not really listening to you. And you have to like fight to get your order out. And he's already kind of over it. And then, you know, that is the

sandwich that's going to change your life. I appreciate that. I understand that. I understand that. I understand that. I like a bodega energy. New York, that's a bacon, egg and cheese energy. I appreciate that. I understand. I relate to that. What's the best slice of pizza in New York? The closest one to you. I agree with that completely. Can you talk a little bit about the status of the fight to pass gun safety legislation in Pennsylvania and some of the work that you're trying to do there? Yeah. So unfortunately, the status of that, if we don't win back the House and Josh is not elected, is very bleak. You have Republicans right now spending a lot of money putting up ads,

using the word crime, but the reality is they don't give a damn about crime. They don't know anything about living in communities where people are actually suffering from gun violence, from gun crimes. And it turns out that people who live in communities like mine in North Philly actually care a lot about us reducing the amount of gun crimes. And they understand that we have to take a holistic approach to this, including doing something about gun safety. The issues of ghost guns, for example, have become a real pariah. We're seeing them pop up more and more and more. We just had a shooting at my high school, alma mater, Roxborough High School, where five kids were shot. One, Nicholas, was murdered. And it's heartbreaking to think that Nicholas

would be 15 today. To see these constant school shootings, constant school shootings, and you have folks who are committed to doing everything they can to make it more likely, not less likely, that people get their hands on the guns. For example, Pennsylvania passed, and thank God, Governor, will vetoed, a permitless carry bill, which we know makes it more likely that you see the types of gun deaths that we need to be trying to stop. So, you know, we've seen this across the country, that Republicans, yeah, that, you know, this is happening. It's happening here in Pennsylvania. There's tons of ads targeting John Fetterman. There's, we see this in Wisconsin targeting Mandela Barnes, see it everywhere, where basically, you know, Republicans are trying to use crime

to target Democrats while also holding onto their anti-gun control position. And in a lot of cases, trying to garner votes from people who live, who basically are not in their own community seeing any of this, but trying to kind of scare them about what's happening in the big cities. What have you seen as the most effective way to kind of fight back against that, which is often racially coded, but basically just trying to kind of scare rural and suburban Republicans and independents into voting Republican based on these sort of crime messages? So, you know what, a part of what I've learned is that we have to show up to places where there are not a lot of folks who necessarily share our experience. And I mean that both ways, not just people from the cities going to rural communities, but folks in rural communities come into the city as well.

Folks in rural communities come into the city as well. I mean, since the primary has been over, I've been to 30 plus counties, all types of communities where I can promise you I have increased the population of black gay kids from North Philly with locks by a thousand percent. By virtue of walking in there. But I will tell you what I find all the time. I was just in Wayne County in Hohensdale. And you walk in and there's this moment where people are like, okay, you are not from Owensdale. And then there's the second moment where I get to talk to people about why I'm here, why I'm in this. I grew up here in North Philly. My dad was a social worker. My mom was a home health aide. They were the best parents in the

world. John, they just didn't like each other. So they got- And that happens. That happens sometimes. So they got divorced when I was pretty young. I lived six different places by the time I graduated high school, got my first job at the age of 12, not far from here, washing dishes at 4th and Spring Garden. And I buried both of my parents by the time I was 25, because they didn't have the type of healthcare that everybody deserves. And so for me and everywhere I go, there are folks who are having that exact experience. And what happens is when we don't know each other, it's very easy to fill that void with the worst possible idea of who you are. It's very rare that you don't know somebody and you're like,

I bet they're great. Usually you think the opposite of that. And so when we show up and don't allow Doug Mastriano and his ilk to fill the void of who we are and actually talk to people about who we are, I think we can beat these folks anywhere in this commonwealth, and I think we're going to win. That's a great place to leave it. Now, thank you so much for being here. You graciously agreed to stick around for another segment. So when we come back,

it's time for Gay News. And we're back. Please welcome back to the stage Jared Goldstein, who's going to join us. Hi, Jared. Hi. I'm drunk now. Yeah. Give, Jared. Hi. I'm drunk now. Yeah.

Give it up for Malcolm. I'm so energized. This is a good show. I can tell. It's good. It's been a good one. That's Philly for you. That's Philly. I love Philly. I do. In case you don't know how this works, here's how. We'll be telling you a little bit of gay news

and then hitting you hard with an insightful punchline. And then the transition between them is we'll all say together, ba-da-ba-ba-da-ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba- a TikTok video that asked, if you identify as bisexual, do you own a green velvet couch by leaping on our own green velvet couch? If couches are linked to sexuality, I guess I'm coming out as covered in crumbs. Sometimes the finger pulls the trigger, but sometimes the trigger pulls the finger. Maybe bisexuals don't buy green

velvet couches. Maybe green velvet couches stir something inside of us. But above it, up above and above gay news. An Iowa TV reporter came out publicly as trans during a newscast. My name is Nora J.S. Reichardt, and I am a transgender woman living in Des Moines and working for WOI Local 5. For a long time, I didn't think I would get to say that at least not on air like this I didn't know if there was a place in a space for me to do this sort of work that I've really come to love and

enjoy while also getting to be myself while I do it and now let's talk about the deadly eight-car pileup behind me. As you can see, the fire is still blazing back to you, Jim. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba who will now check IDs to ensure that attendees at a drag performance are over 18. But jokes on Republicans, because gay people love the indoors. That's where all our stuff is. Sorry, teens, no campy lip-syncing for you. Republicans want you safe at home in your room with the door closed and your eyes fixed on the tiny glowing porn-violent, cyber-bullying, body dysmorphia screen you got for your birthday when you turned 12. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba- Amy Lovato song, Cool for the Summer, helped her realize she's gay. We're all on our own journeys.

That song briefly convinced me I was straight. Ba-da-ba-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba. Gay news. Billy Eichner further addressed Bro's box office performance, saying that he believes homophobia was just one factor, along with the bold swing of giving a romantic comedy with no big movie stars a theatrical release. No big movie stars?

Are we all just going to sit here and pretend that Guy Branum wasn't Natalie Portman's gay roommate in 2011? No strings attached? We're just going to pretend that never happened? I totally forgot about that. Guy! Guy! Guy! Guy! Guy! Guy!

Oh my gosh. Gay news! Guy news! Guy news! Guy, erase Guy News. Guy erased it, Jim. The drag queen Little Hot Mess, whom Florida Senator Marco Rubio featured in an ad, had one question for him. Hi, I'm Little Miss Hot Mess,

and I have one question for Marco Rubio. Why are you so obsessed with me? Hey, said Marco Rubio. That's not fair. with me? Hey, said Marco Rubio. That's not fair. I'm also dodging any questions or issues where my actual views might put me on the wrong side of the Republican base. Ba-da-ba-ba-da-ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Ignition Reform Bill, calling Scotland's First Minister, Nicola Sturgeon, a destroyer of women's rights.

When Sturgeon and Rowling are in the same headline, that's surf and turf. There's a... Ba-da-ba-ba-ba-da-ba-da-ba. Gay news. Now, before we do the next joke, Hallie, our head writer, had a lesbian punchline she wants to do. Hallie? Hi, Hallie.

Oh, hi. All right, Jared, kick us off. A viral clip from the latest Scooby-Doo movie has confirmed that Velma is a lesbian. Yeah. Great. What other beloved childhood character are they going to suddenly tell us is queer?

Ursula? Can't wait to watch intelligent Gen Z queer people waste the next 12 years of their lives proving Daphne is one too. Gaylor is a prison of the mind. Free yourself. Ba-da-ba-ba-da-ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Oh my gosh. So Virgin Atlantic will no longer require flight attendants, pilots, and other crew members to wear traditionally gendered uniforms, allowing them to choose whichever version of the uniform

they would like. Your flight attendant could be wearing a pantsuit the next time she has to duct tape a passenger for trying to strangle her. So don't tell me we're not making progress as a society. However, the company policy requiring them all to stay virgins remains intact. Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-gay news. And finally, before the new right-wing administration can take office,

the outgoing Italian government quickly adopted a new plan for LGBTQ rights in the country, hoping to fight discrimination of queer people in hospitals, schools, and the workplace. I sure hope the Italian LGBTQ community can relax and enjoy the two months they still have rights, like when you take a nap while your house burns down. Why did we end on that note? Ba-da-ba-ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. Gay news.

Very depressing gay news. Listen, I have some gay news. How great is Malcolm Kenyatta? Come on. Thank you. One more time is Malcolm Kenyatta? Come on. Thank you. One more time for Malcolm Kenyatta. Thank you. And thank you so much, Jared.

Check out Jared's Tangents Welcome, a weekly radio show on Mondays at 2 o'clock on AM. Last week, we had zero listeners. Oh, my God, Jared. It's a live show. Don't tell them that. The numbers are real. Zero listeners.

Jared. I swear to God, if one of you listens, you will ruin this. No listen. Don't listen to it. No, we're promoting it. Do not listen. I want to streak. I want to see how many episodes we can go live.

Zero listeners. If one of you even turns up, I swear to God, I will know. Don't you dare listen to my live show on Amp Radio every Monday at 2 p.m. PST called Tangents Welcome with Jared Goldstein. Malcolm Kenyatta, thank you so much. That was a blast. Don't go anywhere. This is Love It or Leave It, and there's more on the way. And we're back! Love It or Leave It has new merch available

in the Crooked store, and it's inspired by a high note that took place at this very show. A rich guy who uses his wealth to fund vigilante justice. That doesn't sound right to us. That's why you can head to Cricut.com slash store to get your defund Bruce Wayne shirt today. Look, here's the thing. We run a tight operation. Somebody has an idea? Six to eight months later, we can get a t-shirt out there.

And we finally did it. There's a lot of other really good stuff. The store is really cool. Crooked.com slash store. I'm actually really proud of it. It's really cool stuff. It's not all like resistance-y. It's not like resistance merch.

Like, I'd rather have my politics before my covfefe none of that none of that horse shit also crooked is bringing you the election coverage you love to hate with crooked radio every weekend in october on sirius xm progress and on the sirius xm app join our lineup of hosts candidates and experts and more including love or leave it at 7 p.m and 10 p.m. Eastern every Saturday and 10 p.m. Eastern on Sundays as we break down all the issues that matter this November, dive into the conversation shaping our politics, and give the only 100% correct opinions in politics. So listen on channel 127 or subscribe now and get up to four months of SiriusXM for free at SiriusXM.com slash crooked. We're taking over the Progress channel all weekend.

SiriusXM.com slash crooked. We're taking over the Progress Channel all weekend. Now for a segment we call Hot Takes. Here's how it works. We'll each have 30 seconds to defend an absolutely bullshit opinion as if they came directly from our own decrepit brains. We get one skip, but beware, the producers of the show are cruel, and what you skip to may be worse. So let's see what we have first. Now that Biden is making

moves on weed, I can reveal my dream blunt rotation. Try guys, Ned, Roger Stone and Meghan McCain. Skip. Pristine beaches, rolling acres of farmland, Bruce Springsteen, Frank Sinatra, Lauryn Hill, Six Flags, Great Adventure, the best malls in the country that you can drive to without ever having to touch a nasty gas pump, and most importantly, a place where Dr. Oz is not running for Senate. New Jersey is perfect. No notes.

I'm ready to defend this. It's not easy to be New Jersey, alright? It's all stereotypes. It's all traffic, Tony Soprano, the fucking dump, and Newark Airport. That's not fair. It's filled with people, and some of them are great. I once went to a pizza place, I believe in Neptune, where if you ate the biggest pizza they had, beaten Eldas, and you eat the whole pizza, you get a t-shirt. And they didn't think I looked like the kind of person that was going to get that done,

but they don't know me. And I sat there, I sat there, and I ate the whole fucking thing, and I got that t-shirt. That's a giant pizza. That's no joke. If you know what I'm talking about,

tell the people around you that it's no joke. Right? Say it. It's no joke. If you know what I'm talking about, tell the people around you that it's no joke. Right? Say it. It's no joke. And there's Six Flags Great Adventure, and I don't know if it still exists, and I hope it doesn't, but it used to be you can drive your car

through fucking ostriches. I don't know how that was ever allowed. What kind of car culture, fucking colonial British, fucking bullshit, anti-animal 1930s last surviving member of a

species zoo idea it was that you can drive your fucking car surrounded by rhinos and monkeys. It's still there? No fucking way. They haven't shut that down. New Jersey rules. Thank you.

Let's see what we have next. Never date a stand-up comedian. Don't do it. Jared. I can do that. Okay, never date a stand-up comedian. I am one. I've never done it.

We're weird people. We work at night. We aren't happy. Our lives are really cool and perfect, and it's never enough. I'm sitting here. I'm getting my picture taken, and I'm still pissed.

I'm underwhelmed. I'm constantly bored. Definitely don't date me. I've also never been in a relationship. Never date a comedian. Wow. Thank you for sharing that, Jaren. Well, Jill, it's time for you to take a swig of the hot take barrel. I'm so sorry. Rolling Stone is correct. The three best TV shows of all time are The Sopranos, The Simpsons, and Breaking Bad. Do you agree with that?

I skip. Skip. You can skip it. You can skip it. Let's see what else you got. I've never seen any of them. The older you are on TikTok, the better and more relatable you are.

Jill, take it away. I actually think this is true. I think TikTok is kind of all about being absurd and embarrassing. And older people just don't have the tech savviness to even navigate the app. So they end up just inadvertently posting really bizarre and bad content. But as a result, like they're better. They're more relatable. Like grandmothers who just can't figure out how to use their phone and didn't even know they were making a video have millions and millions of followers. What a sick society we are. I saw a video this morning of an older woman saying,

I'm so glad the work week is over on Fridays, even if the week is short. I guess I don't like work, but I have to do it for money. 70 million views. It's a cool app. It's a cool app. All right, let's see what's next.

Let's see what's next. Oh my God. This says, I can't skip I already skipped the first one I'm fucked This says Christian Wonker I'd hit it

Which is of course My opinion Here's the thing The opposite of love Isn't hate It's indifferent And when I see A person in the Starbucks the opposite of love isn't hate. It's indifferent. And when I see a person in the Starbucks drive-thru blaming Joe Biden because they're out of caramel syrup,

I'm definitely not indifferent to it. So I do feel strongly. And how far is love from hate, you know, when you really think about it? And he does have, like, actually, you know, credit where it's due, great skin, you know, celebrity level quality skin. That's all I've got. That's the best I can give you. That was good.

That was the right level of horrible. I thought I didn't know who he was until you said the Starbucks thing. When I first saw the Starbucks thing, I was like, this is a parody. This can't be real. But it is. Let's do the next one i love that serial killers are just network ip now jared take it away oh okay um i love that serial killers are just network ip now and i definitely And I definitely know what network IP is. It stands for industry penis. Oh, you have another one here. They're bailing you out. Someone told me that I look like Dean Cain and Jim Carrey had a baby.

And you know what? That's fair. Okay. Somebody just told me that I look like Dean Cain and Jim Carrey had a baby. And that is, not only is that fair, I also do really love that. These are two incredible contributors of, I'll say it, content. Famous content creator, Jim Carrey. And influencer, Dean Cain.

Which is what they are. I love that, and I'm flattered. And I look so good. It's really good to be me. I think it's 100% a compliment. Yeah. It's like. Oh, completely.

No, literally. Oh, that's what I meant. You're, you know, you look like a Superman who can land a joke. Can I say, can I say, I do this like weird, just little racism test where with people where I'll go, people say I look like Jim Carrey. And if they go, huh? No. I go, you're racist.

Well, now they know about the test. All right, let's see what's next. There has been too much gritty content. Enough already. Yep. Jill, that's your view. I don't know if the fact that the G is capitalized is signaling to me that this is a proper noun. Okay.

No, you have to keep going. Clearly, there's not enough gritty content because it hasn't been served to me. I don't know what gritty is. Yes. This is awesome. And I think that... You can do this one instead if you don't... Listen, not knowing gritty is honestly a badge of honor, and you can all face it.

I'm trying to help. I'm trying to help. Here's the thing. Just so you understand, I think the simplest way to explain it is gritty is a monster that they worship. Okay. Okay. All right. Next up for Jill.

Now that Biden is making moves on weed, I can reveal my dream blunt rotation. Try guys Ned, Roger Stone, and Meghan McCain. Yeah, absolutely. When I'm smoking weed, if I'm high, I don't like to talk a lot. And so having Meghan McCain there and just relate the conversation back to herself

bring it back to her husband and or her father and just being a female Republican would be helpful. Also try guys Ned. I don't know I just love his vibe. I feel like he seems like a good person. I haven't been keeping up like obviously

not tuned into pop culture. I get good vibes. He's a good pop culture. I get good vibes. Good vibes. He's a good person. He's a good person. That was great. I'll do one. I'll do the gritty one.

I'm going to do the gritty one. We'll end with this. There's been too much gritty content. I say enough already. It's enough with this fucking gritty guy. All right? Here's the thing. It was funny at first, but now we're projecting all our hopes and dreams onto him. What does he think? What does he care about? He must share my views. He must share my values.

People think he's socialist. People think he's a DSA. Why? Because he's a monster who goes on the ice? You don't know what's in his heart. None of us does. I don't trust it. Boo. Boo me. Boo. Boo me. Boo. Gritty, come on out here. He's not here. And that's how it takes. here. And that's how it takes. One more time for Jill McGuire and Jared Goldstein. That was so great. When we come back, we'll end on a high

note. I want you to know that that's not actually my view and I'll tell you the honest truth. We try to book gritty every time we come to this state. It's like trying to book Meghan Markle. It's fucking impossible. It's like trying to book Meghan Markle. It's fucking impossible. You're the same person. You know what?

That's a really good point. How many of us can say we've ever seen, has anyone ever seen Meghan Markle and Gritty in the same place at the same time? I haven't. And we're back. Now it's time to end on a high note. Kendra is out there.

She's going to line up in the middle. Hi, what is your name and what is your high note? My name is Adam Rizzo. I am the president of the PMA Union, the Philadelphia Museum of Art Union. I'm a teacher at the museum. I've been teaching there for eight years, and we've been on strike for two days.

No, sorry, two weeks. Two weeks. Two weeks. Sorry, I had a couple of drinks. It's been a long day on the picket line. Yeah, yeah. And I am just so impressed with the solidarity of the workers at the museum and the community

and all of the amazing people who have been coming out every day. And I am just so grateful for the city of Philadelphia for supporting us. And it's been really incredible. And just so people understand that this strike is two weeks old, but this is a culmination of multi-years of trying to get a better contract. We've been negotiating. We won our election in July of 2020. We have been negotiating for more than two years. They hired Morgan Lewis and Bakias as their representatives at the table. It's been a real slog.

Yeah, it's been a long two weeks. I'm so grateful for my community. And thank you. Thank you. I'm so grateful for my community. And thank you. Thank you. Well, thank you for sharing that. And we have a strike fund. If you go to PMA Union on Instagram or Twitter, please donate to our strike fund. We've been out for two weeks.

It's really appreciated. We're holding the line, and we are so grateful. Thank you. Thank you. Hi, what is your name and what is your high note? Hi, my name is Ian, and I would like to say, as the husband of Adam Rizzo, who is the president of the union, he has been working so hard and has given so much of himself

that I would love for Philadelphia to give him a big round of applause. I have to say, a follow-up husband high note has never been done before. It's never been tried, but we'll allow it. The rare double high note. Hi, what's your name? What's your high note? Hi, I'm Kat, and I was going to say that I'm the Democratic Party chair of the President's County Party in Delaware. And since you're not coming back to Philly because you don't like gritty, you're welcome in Delaware. But then they said that they were from PMA, and I'm also the political and legislative director for AFSCME Council 81 in Delaware, and we are standing in solidarity with them. That's great.

And my high note, other than being from the president's home state, is I am here with my high school best friend, and we were supposed to be in Baltimore in April of 2020, and now we're here, and I am so glad that we are here, and I am so glad that I am here with her. And she is getting more involved in politics. And I am so proud of her.

And our union activists that are in the audience today. Thank you so much. And I think it's exciting to have someone from Delaware. Because obviously we've had some fun with New Jersey. We've had some fun from Pennsylvania. But everyone from New Jersey and Pennsylvania, we can all agree together that Delaware is a fucking place we pay a toll. And that's that. Let's hear it. Let's hear it. I love Delaware. It's where I wait in line to pay a toll and my credit card companies live.

I love you. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. It's got beautiful beaches, beaches, beaches, beaches. And I'm sure there's a sandwich worth eating. It's fun to rag on just one tiny state. You're used to it. Hi, what's your, I love you. I'm just kidding. I just, it was just saying, look, I'm in a crowd of, it was pandering. It was pandering. And years of driving through Delaware. What is your name and what is your high note? Hi, I'm Dani Holtz. I'm a historian of white supremacy and conservatism. My partner works on fascism and pop culture.

And inspired by you guys, we started a podcast about Tolkien, Lord of the Rings, and the far right and fascism called American Id, Eye of Sauron. And I also want to say, you say the smartest shit on Pod Save America, and they should stop interrupting you so much. Okay. No. We gotta trim that out.

No. Oh, stop it. It's true, you know it. Stop it. Come on. Come on. Can't leave that in the show. I'll never be the end of it.

Oh, we're totally leaving it in. So first and foremost, Kendra, thank you. You are wonderful. First and foremost, you are just my, I love you so much. John, I love you too, but I have to give her kudos first. Okay. You get it. You get it.

Keep it up here. My high note is actually I'm here with my husband, Matthew, who is a healthcare worker. I know the pandemic is over for a lot of people, but he still works so hard. And it was a tough time for us.

Five rescheduling of the wedding. Five times. Five times. But that's okay, because this was just one of the most wonderful days being here and being with you and being with all of everybody. This is absolutely

a high note of a few years. Thank you for everything you do. Oh, and I'm an election worker too. So please vote. Please. We need your vote. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

I just want to say to save my job, I'm not putting plants in the audience. I want you to know that. Everybody loves Kendra. Hi, what's your name? What's your high note my job, I'm not putting plants in the audience. Everybody loves Kendra. Hi, what's your name? What's your high note? Hi, I'm Amanda. I'm a high school math teacher.

And the thing that gave me hope this week is that my students asked me a question about my best friend. And I started talking about my best friend. And then my students totally roasted me for not having immediately said, oh, it's my wife. And I really love that I teach somewhere where my students can know that I'm married to a woman and they can roast me about it. I think that's great. And that's awesome. And it's great that you teach somewhere where the kids are like that. But the amazing thing is the kids are like that everywhere. It's the parents that are the problem.

The kids get it. Everywhere. Everywhere. Hi, what is your name and what is your high note? Hi, I'm Kellen. My high note is something that made me laugh the last couple weeks with the friend that I'm here with. We heard this story from my dad. He was talking about him going to the gym in our town all summer that has lots of Trump flags and just a really unwelcoming environment

and that he would go to the gym and every day he had to watch Fox News or Fox Business. And then he was in there one day by himself and he realized that the parental controls had not been set up on the TVs. I see where this is going. So he went in and he changed the parental controls so that they could no longer have Fox News blaring during the gym.

Nice. And my friend and I heard that story, and our immediate reaction was, we got to tell Lovett. So thank you. I love it. Yeah, I would say that there's two things you can do to support your loved ones when you go home for Thanksgiving or the holidays.

Step one, we turn off motion smoothing. We turn all the motion flow, whatever proprietary version of it is on your screen, we turn it off because we have love for our relatives. And then we block Fox News, Fox Business, OAN, Newsmax, or whatever other fucking godforsaken hell site comes up onto the television between now and then. I think that's something we can all do.

Thank you for sharing. Let's do a couple more, but you've got to keep them quick because we're running out of time. So quick high notes. What's your name? What's your high note? First, thank you for coming canvassing on Sunday in the rain. It's fun. In the rain.

Yeah, that was really fun. Because I really care. That's how you know. It was very cold, and I was very impressed. My high note starts out sad, but it's a real high note, actually. So last year, my dad became the sixth bicyclist to be killed while bicycling in Philadelphia. So as a lifelong Philadelphian who has never learned how to drive or anything, obviously I just depended on SEPTA for whatever.

That's our bus and, like, trains. And today, actually, I went on my first bike ride that was on, like, city streets and everything. that was on like city streets and everything. So it feels like a small thing and a big thing at the same time. So obviously like my friends, my husband, obviously, and my therapist are really wonderful, great people for that. Thank you for sharing that.

Hi, what is your name? What is your high note? My name is Gabrielle. And my high note is that I am here with my best friend of over 20 years for the first time in a very long time. We're living in the same city. But most importantly, we are here tonight with her son who I love so much celebrating his 14th birthday. That's great. Thank you. What is your name? What is your high note? Hi, my name is Carrie and my high note is that my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer earlier this year and after months of chemotherapy and surgery, we just found out last week that she

is cancer free. That's great. That's awesome. Hi, what's your name? What's your high note? Hi, my name is Laura, but my students call me Miss Apple. I teach high school special education here in Philadelphia. I've worked for local like charter schools, public schools. First of all, I want to say go birds and go Phillies because, you know, 11 years, red October, let's go. But despite all of the violence and the increased horribleness that we have seen here in the city the kids that I work with still are positive and still maintain the drive to make themselves better and to make this city better and it only encourages me and gives me more hope for

the future and with students like Malcolm Kenyatta from Roxborough to only further our agenda here from Philly and make this state better, I'm excited to see what the future holds. Thank you. What's your name? What's your high note? We'll finish these two. My name is Ben. I'm an engineer. I make those big fields of solar panels. That's my job. Nice. And my high note today is about the Inflation Reduction Act, which when it passed, everybody was very excited and happy. And the two headlines were,

here's a big chunk of money that we're spending. And the other headline was, this doesn't go far enough and we're screwed anyway. And those things are both deeply frustrating for me. So my high note this week is that I dug into the fine print of the Inflation Reduction Act. And there's one part of it that I want to highlight for everyone, not just in Philadelphia, but across the state of Pennsylvania. When you build one of those big solar arrays or wind farms or whatever, and the government pays you,

right, there's a tax provision or a tax subsidy in the bill. That's how most of these things get built. If you build your project in a community that is a historical energy community, so places where they used to frack for gas or drill for oil or dig for coal, if you bring a new tax base back to these communities, the government will pay you extra money just for building in these ex-urban places that the Republicans love to talk about how they want to support. But every single one of them voted against it. Democrats should be talking more about it. And I didn't realize that it was in the bill until a couple days ago. So that's my high note.

That's awesome. Thank you. Our last high note. What's your name? What's your high note? Hi. My name's William. Our last high note. What's your name? What's your high note? Hi, my name's William. I'm a queer 14-year-old from Minnesota. Nice. First, I would like to say I didn't notice that everybody else had sat down

fully in accident, but this is great. My high note is that after a couple years of being really invested in the news and politics, last week I finally decided I was old enough and ready enough to get involved. I signed up with Vote Save America, and last Sunday I phone-banked with Call for Change. And it was awesome. Thank you for sharing that. That's great. Thank you so much. That's a great place to leave it.

See, he knew to wait. He knew to wait it out. Thanks to everybody who shared a high note tonight. If you want to leave us a message about something that gave you hope, call us at 323-538-2377. That is our show. Thank you so much to Josh Shapiro, Malcolm Kenyatta, Jill McGuire, and Jared Goldstein. Thank you so much, Philadelphia. This was so much fun.

There are 24 days until the midterm elections. Have a great weekend. term elections. Have a great weekend. Jocelyn Kaufman, Pallavi Gunalan, and Peter Miller are the writers, Bill Lance is our editor, and Kyle Seglin is our sound engineer. Our theme song is written and performed by Sure Sure. Thanks to our designers, Jesse McClain and Caroline Haywood, for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast, and to our digital producers, Narmal Konian, Zuri Ervin, and Milo Kim, Mia Kelman, and Matt DeGroot for filming and editing video each week so you can, and you can find these glorious videos at youtube.com slash crookedmedia.