Lovett or Leave It - Couch Me If You Can

Episode Date: July 27, 2024

Hot off Biden’s endorsement, Kamala Harris (Allison Reese) returns to the show, fired up and ready to go. Monet X Change drags Republicans through the hallowed halls of Congress. And as the Olympics... begin, we're feeling patriotic and taking that feeling out for a spin.Tour dates & cities: crooked.com/events For a closed-captioned version of this episode, click here. For a transcript of this episode, please email transcripts@crooked.com and include the name of the podcast. 

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello Los Angeles! Great to be back. Welcome to Love It or Leave It. It's been five days since Vice President Kamala Harris officially entered the race. And if you think we've run out of coconut jokes, then you don't know this show. And if you think those coconut jokes will be good coconut jokes then you don't know this show and if you think those coconut jokes will be good then you definitely don't know this show. Tonight great booking vice president Kamala Harris is here she was already booked and she didn't cancel so that's amazing
Starting point is 00:00:39 Monet exchange pits drag queens against drab Republicans. Then we all fasten our star-spangled seat belts for a spin of the patriotic wheel. Uncle Sam wants rants. But first, let's get into it. What a week. What a week. On Wednesday, President Biden addressed the nation
Starting point is 00:01:04 from the Oval Office. I revere this office, but I love my country more. It's been the honor of my life to serve as your president. But in the defense of democracy, which is at stake, I think it's more important than any title. Don't feel bad for him, though. Becoming a national martyr is every young Catholic boy's ultimate dream. After that recurring one where God sends a letter to his mother detailing every time he's jerked it on a Sunday, the president continued. I draw strength and I find joy in working for the
Starting point is 00:01:38 American people. But this sacred task of perfecting our union, it's not about me. It's about you, your families, your futures. It's about we, the people. We can never forget that. And I never have. Why did we decide we didn't want this guy? It's so weird to me. People are so weird.
Starting point is 00:02:02 I don't get it. Said Biden. I believe my record as president, my leadership in the world, my vision for America's future, all merited a second term. But nothing, nothing can come in the way of saving our democracy. That includes personal ambition. Biden then ended the telecast and instead of following Miranda Priestly into the Paris fashion show, threw his flip phone into the Fontaine de Fleur, Fontaine de Fleur, Fontaine de Fleur, and walked away from it all.
Starting point is 00:02:38 On Tuesday, Kamala Harris hit the ground running at a campaign event in Milwaukee. As Attorney General of California, I took on one of our country's largest for-profit colleges that was scamming students. Donald Trump ran a for-profit college that scammed students. No! As a prosecutor, I specialized in cases involving sexual abuse. Well, Trump was found liable for committing sexual abuse.
Starting point is 00:03:11 Hook it into my veins. Do you know how much of a world-class asshole you have to be that we forget you started a fake college to scam students? Students who wanted nothing more than to learn how to start businesses from the world's worst person. Here's Vice President Harris on Project 2025. Donald Trump wants to take our country backward. He and his extreme Project 2025 agenda will weaken the middle class.
Starting point is 00:03:44 Like we know we gotta take this seriously. Can you believe they put that thing in writing? It is crazy that they put that thing in writing. Project 2025 should have been an oral tradition performed by throat singers at Heritage Foundation male only retreats. And from the sounds of it, from the feel of it, from the vibe shift, feels like America is on board Kamala 2024 Express. We believe in a future where every person has the opportunity not just to get by, but
Starting point is 00:04:17 to get ahead. A future where no child has to grow up in poverty. Where every worker has the freedom to join a union. Where every person has affordable health care, affordable childcare, and paid family leave. And fuck it, I'll say it, Diet Mountain Dew is racist. racist. Meanwhile on Wednesday, Vote.org reported that over 38,500 people registered to vote since Biden dropped out on Sunday, a 700% spike in registrations this election cycle.
Starting point is 00:05:17 Also on Wednesday, the Crooked Store dropped a new shirt that says, vote in the brat font. Coincidence? It is a coincidence. It is a coincidence. We couldn't get a picture of that. But for... Celebrities followed in Charli XCX's footsteps and endorsed Kamala with Cardi B tweeting, let's go. I told y'all Kamala was supposed to be the 2024 candidate. In 2024, let's elect a wow, a woman ass president. Hillary Clinton on Wednesday published a New York Times op-ed titled, How Kamala Harris Can Win and Make History. Clinton wrote of Biden giving up the nomination,
Starting point is 00:05:52 as one who shared that dream and has had to make peace with letting it go, I know this wasn't easy, but it was the right thing to do. Letting go of dreams is tough. I imagine, never done it personally. I still think this will be a TV show one day. No, I'm kidding. I know it can't be. I didn't get TV thin until I was radio old.
Starting point is 00:06:16 Then on Thursday, Kamala's campaign released their first ad with Beyonce's Freedom as her campaign song. There are some people who think we should be a country of chaos, of fear, of hate. But us, we choose something different. We choose freedom. I take that chaos part personally, grumbled Rudy Giuliani as he was being chased by like six geese. Let's enjoy more ad is above the law. Into the veins. Trump responded, you had me at safe from gun violence, but then you lost me at the part
Starting point is 00:07:15 about my crimes. Also on Thursday, Trump dropped his first attack ad, and this is how it starts. I am Kamala Harris, My pronouns are she and her. Unbelievable. This is how Trump explains the reasoning behind this ad. Quote, I hate pronouns. Uh, I mean, Trump hate pronouns. Trump fear mongers around all the topics you'd expect,
Starting point is 00:07:40 the border, defund the police, Bernie Sanders, and worst of all. Do you ban plastic straws? I think we should. Okay, just inside of our circle here we can admit that that's a miss. Paper straws are bad, it's easily the Republican party's strongest issue. But we can't let the fear of limp paper straws losing all structural integrity after three minutes in an iced oat latte to control our futures. There has to be a better way. We can get Biden's cancer moonshot people on it. We can solve this problem. And until then, we're just going to use the plastic straws.
Starting point is 00:08:12 I would like, I want to see Kamala just using plastic straws. I don't like the sippy lid. Meanwhile, Kamala's campaign team has been responding to Trump. They send an email entitled Statement on a 78 year old criminalold Criminal's Fox News Appearance, with a bulleted list of issues including, Trump is clearly worried he made the wrong pick in JD Vance, Trump is old and quite weird? This guy should never be president again. First of all, 10 out of 10 no notes. It is awesome. It is awesome seeing this campaign of talented people unleashed in this way. It's like Kamala walked around and breathed on the statues like Aslan.
Starting point is 00:08:50 Then the campaign's secret weapon is fucking Doug. Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug. I've seen this proposed on social media, which is that we should not obey the previous conventions in any forum, that it should be, ladies and gentlemen, Madam President and Doug. His official title should be Doug. Speaking to Jewish Democrats this week, Doug said this. I'm just going to keep living, like, openly like a Jew and maybe there'll be a Mississa on the White House.
Starting point is 00:09:26 Let's just think of some of the downsides. Chuck Schumer sees the mizuzah on the White House, instantly climaxes. We toned it down from comes. It's a nice idea. But the White House won't be fully Jewified until there's a six month old box of Straits and Matzah in the kitchen and a loose lactate rolling around the drawers of the Resolute Desk. You gotta be able to walk into that White House and say, I can get a lactate if I need
Starting point is 00:09:57 a lactate. That's how you know that this place is the home of a Jewish man. Doug hides the offie coman in the situation room, hijinks and an unfortunate military confrontation with China ensues. Uh oh. Meanwhile, Trump's team is reportedly panicked at new polling showing Harris in the lead just ahead of the former president. Imagine panicking about polls. Couldn't be us. Not now, not ever. According to Reuters, Harris is currently polling at 44% with Trump bringing up the rear at 42%.
Starting point is 00:10:31 Back in the margin of error, baby. Living life in that sweet, sweet M of E. Yum, yum, yum. But if it helps, Donald, you're in the lead age-wise. You're at 78. Donald Trump is 78. And I think that's pretty old. Pretty old to nominate a person who at 78. Donald Trump is 78 and I think that's pretty old. Pretty old to nominate a person who's 78. Don't even know what these Republicans are thinking. Strange decision they've made. It's weird. He's a weird guy and old. So I'm gonna
Starting point is 00:10:56 think about it. Then you think, well who's gonna be president if he's at that age? Well it's JD Vance, someone whose personality is not good. Not a likeable man. Not somebody you trust. Something to think about. Trump's chief pollster, who is not Tampa's gayest hairstylist, Tony Fabrizio, rushed to assure the MAGA fans that yes, okay, the polls might look bad, but before long, Harris' honeymoon will end and voters will refocus on her role as Biden's partner and co-pilot. She may have been Biden's co-pilot, but look at me.
Starting point is 00:11:33 Look at me. She's the captain now. Trump's buddies on Fox did their best to tamp down the nation's newfound optimism. You need to understand what's happening here. This is Kamala's honeymoon period. She is experiencing a sugar high, a feeling of relief and enthusiasm that the guy that can't walk and talk that stays and confused, the guy that mumbles and bumbles and stumbles, ah, thank God it's not him. It's a honeymoon. It's a sugar high. But mark my words, it will be short life.
Starting point is 00:12:08 So first of all, I love that clip. I love that Sean Hannity is basically like a thunder blanket for like angry, confused, old white Republicans watching this being like, what's happening? I don't understand. They seem to like her, but she's dancing and he being like, what's happening? This can't, there's, I don't understand. She seems, they seem to like her, but she's dancing. And he's like, it's okay. The polls are going to be bad, but you're going to be okay. Just you get onto the desk and you get into a small space. It's just a sugar high, says Sean Hannity.
Starting point is 00:12:39 Voters will come to their senses and realize they need us for a hearty, filling serving of dog shit. And I will say this, Sean does have a point. Kamala is our rebound. And it did happen pretty fast after the breakup. But you know what? When it feels right, you know it. And before you say it, mom, no, this is not another Andrew Cuomo situation.
Starting point is 00:13:02 What we have with Kamala is real. Republicans also continue to call Harris a DEI hire, their latest euphemism for being black if it's a woman speaking or a woman if it's a man speaking. Like Republican Representative Harriet Hagman. I think it's just a failure from top to bottom. I think she was a DEI hire and I think that that's what we're seeing and I just don't think that they have anybody else. I just think that they're in real disarray. I just have to say, there are people online comparing her to George Santos and saying, George Santos has snuck back
Starting point is 00:13:31 into Congress. And that's not right. That's not right. Stop it. And sure, that makes sense. Kamala got to where she is because she's the black daughter of an immigrant. This is in contrast to Donald Trump, who worked his way up to real estate tycoon from his humble beginnings as son of real estate tycoon.
Starting point is 00:13:58 Not to be outdone, Congressman Andy Ogles filed articles of impeachment against Harris, accusing her of a public breach of trust for allegedly covering up the president's well-being or lack thereof. Wrote Ogles, Kamala Devi Harris has knowingly misled the people of the United States to obfuscate the physical and cognitive well-being of the president
Starting point is 00:14:15 of the United States, Joe Biden. They only got to Tuesday before busting out her middle name. I thought for sure we'd close out the week, but that's just on me. Jonathan Hussein Lovett. At a rally in Charlotte, North Carolina on Wednesday, Donald Trump brought his post-assassination attempt, Spiritual Awakening, to a close. You know, I was supposed to be nice. They say something happened to me when I got shot.
Starting point is 00:14:40 I became nice. And when you're dealing with these people, they're very dangerous people, when you're dealing with them, you can't be too nice. You really can't be. So if you don't mind, I'm not gonna be nice. Is that okay? I'm not. They say something happened to me,
Starting point is 00:14:58 the asshole area of my brain, they call it the asshole area, it got knocked offline, okay, but it's back now, the doctors save it, and they're saying it's stronger than it's ever been. The fact that even he can make fun of the stupid fucking story that claimed he had been changed by what happened. He knows it's a joke.
Starting point is 00:15:13 That was funny though. We gotta give it to him. That was a good one. Trump kindly repeated Harris's central campaign message. They get me to that position and then their campaign says I'm the prosecutor and he is the convicted felon. That's their campaign. I don't think people are going to buy it. I don't think people are going to buy this true sentence that is so memorable as a contrast. I, her opponent, am repeating it at my own rally reminding everyone here and every
Starting point is 00:15:41 reporter covering this event about how interesting that contrast message is. It's like Pepsi saying, they think people like Santa and polar bears and are going to associate ice cold Arctic snow and the joy of Christmas with their delicious refreshing soda. Give me a break. Stupid thing for Pepsi to say. In all seriousness, if you really want to see where the Trump campaign is at right now, just check out Donald Jr. over on Rumble.
Starting point is 00:16:04 Like there's some of them are like, we don't even want white women. Like it doesn't like we need to check like three or four boxes so you can end up with like if you're like a trans communist, this that the other like you too can be the CEO of a fortune 500 company with no experience. He's actually spent real time with them. Any sort of I would say he's the blue collar billionaire 15 years ago. Okay. Okay.
Starting point is 00:16:23 Okay. First of all, do you remember that commercial when I was a kid? Where they said, this has not been sped up. This footage has not been sped up. That is the speed at which Don Jr. is speaking to a silent and deeply confused JD Vance. Shout out to Ron Filipowski for that incredible monjosh of Don Jr. on one.
Starting point is 00:16:46 Meanwhile, social media was aflame this week with an incredible claim about Republican vice presidential candidate JD Vance. I never know. Uh, the claim is that JD Vance once had sex with a couch. How many of you are so terminally online that you're aware of this? How many of you are not aware of this? Proud of you. I'm proud of you are so terminally online that you're aware of this? How many of you are not aware of this? Proud of you. I'm proud of you. Sex with a couch responded Vance, okay, I'll bite.
Starting point is 00:17:13 Why do you think they call it a love seat? The craziest part is Vance let the couch get on top because JD Vance is a lazy boy. I haven't seen people have this much fun on the internet since everybody found out that the JD in JD Vance stands for J.Dolph Dittler. Alas, we are nothing if not journalists here. As it turns out, no such passage exists in Vance's New York Times bestseller, and so we have to say there remains no concrete evidence that JD Vance has publicly admitted to having
Starting point is 00:17:55 sex with a couch. We cannot say more than that, but that is what we can say. It did lead to this incredible fact check by the AP. The headline is, no, JD Vance did not have sex with a couch. But much in the same way that the AP might have debunked one aspect of the story, that is a claim the AP cannot make.
Starting point is 00:18:15 The only claim the AP could make is that the claim that JD Vance documented sex with a couch in Hillbilly Elegy, that is false. But this is a sweeping, sweeping claim of the negative. And anyway, a headline like that tells you your candidacy is off to a roaring start. In other JD Vance, not so recent news, a 2021 clip resurfaced in which the Republican vice presidential candidate accuses Kamala Harris, who is a stepparent, of being miserable
Starting point is 00:18:42 because she's childless. A very good point, because think of all of your friends who don't have children and how miserable they are. And now they're always going, oh you know what would have made this weekend getaway more fun? A toddler. Here's what Vance said. We're effectively run in this country via the Democrats, via our corporate oligarchs, by a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own lives and the choices that they've made. And so they want to make the rest
Starting point is 00:19:07 of the country miserable too. This naturally enraged the nation's childless cat ladies, including Jennifer Aniston, who had spoken publicly about her fertility issues and unsuccessful attempt to conceive using IVF, wrote on Instagram, I truly cannot believe this is coming from a potential VP. All I can say is Mr. Vance, I pray that your daughter is fortunate enough
Starting point is 00:19:25 to bear children of her own one day. Woo! Woo! Oh! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo!
Starting point is 00:19:32 Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! As Minnesota Governor Tim Walzbitt.
Starting point is 00:19:40 I'll tell you what, go ahead and continue to denigrate people, go ahead. My God, they went after cat people. Good luck with that. Turn on the animal and see what cat people do when you go after them. Seems like they mostly just post pictures of their cats, but I take his point. The ex-wife of second gentleman Doug Emhoff leapt into the fray to defend Harris against JD Vance's sexism and criticism.
Starting point is 00:20:04 My God, Trump can't even get his current wife to defend him. Said Kirsten Emhoff, these are baseless attacks for over 10 years since Cole and Ella were teenagers. Kamala has been a co-parent with Doug and I. She is a loving, nurturing, fiercely protective and always present. I love our blended family and am grateful to have her in it. I thought it was mature and involved for me to reply, ha ha ha, when my ex texts me a meme. This is incredible. Harris isn't childless and it's nice of Kirsten with an E to point that out. But also, childless women
Starting point is 00:20:34 are not unfit to hold public office. Giving birth is not a prerequisite to governing. What kind of twisted little sicko freak looks at a woman running for office and goes, ah, but is she breastfed? Also, being endorsed as a stepmom by the ex-wife of your husband is Jedi-level relationship skills. Her husband's ex-wife is on her side. Get this woman in a room with Putin. Meanwhile, fucking weirdos. The weirdo argument is these people are fucking freaks who have talked to each other in rooms alone for so long that they come out and the shit they said is weird. Remember when the Chicago Tribune wanted to call themselves Tronk? This storied brand got into a room, bunch of people spent too much time, had too much coffee, didn't talk to anybody outside of the room, and they came out and said, we've done it. We've figured out a new brand for this thing.
Starting point is 00:21:24 We're calling it Tron it trunk and everybody's like stupid bad go away the Republicans have gone full trunk meanwhile the government's whitest men rushed to throw their hats in the ring for Kamala's vice presidency this week I gotta tell you I'm loving the show Minnesota governor Tim Walls came out swinging against Trump and JD Vance their policies are what destroyed rural America. They've divided us. They're in our exam rooms.
Starting point is 00:21:49 They're telling us what books to read. Walz went on to say this. I think this is going back to the bread and butter. Getting away from this division, we do not like what has happened where we can't even go to Thanksgiving dinner with our uncle because you end up in some weird fight that is unnecessary. And I think bringing back people together, well it's true these guys are just weird. And you know they're running for He-Man Women Haters Club or something. Pick him, pick him said Joe Biden loving the reference.
Starting point is 00:22:23 It's a reference to the little rascals, which I presume Joe Biden would refer to as our gang. Pete Buttigieg also clowned Vance on CNN. The choice of JD Vance is a regrettable choice because he's somebody who was at his most convincing and effective when he talked about how unfit for office Donald Trump is. And he has not explained any reason, other than of course his obvious interest in power, why he would have changed his mind on that.
Starting point is 00:22:51 Kentucky Governor Andy Beshear, Pennsylvania Governor Josh Shapiro, and Arizona Senator and former astronaut and Navy pilot Mark Kelly also came out swinging. But to whom shall she give her rose? Meanwhile, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu arrived in DC to speak to Congress on Wednesday, honestly, perfect week for him to come. He's like a guy trying to get everybody's attention during a fireworks show happening
Starting point is 00:23:11 directly above an active shark attack. In the end, around half of Congress' Democrats, including former Speaker Nancy Pelosi, did not attend Netanyahu's address. Pelosi opted to meet with families of hostages instead. Said Pelosi, Benjamin Netanyahu's presentation in the House chamber today was by far the worst presentation of any foreign dignitary invited and honored with the privilege of addressing the Congress of the United States.
Starting point is 00:23:33 That has to have hit Netanyahu pretty hard, given that Congress has had a lot of sick fucks address it before. For example... For those listening, that is a picture of Elmo addressing Congress. Meanwhile, protesters released piles of maggots and crickets at the Watergate Hotel where Natanyahu was staying. My salad! said R.F.K.
Starting point is 00:23:53 Jr. And what's interesting about that, R.F.K. Jr. has never said anything about eating bugs, but you thought you missed a story. Speaking of creeps, Senator Bob Menendez submitted his resignation and will leave office on August 20th following his conviction on federal corruption charges. Sounds like Kamala just found her VP. You want to defeat a criminal, you gotta think like a criminal. In a recent Adidas ad, Bella Hadid was featured wearing a pair of retro sneakers modeled
Starting point is 00:24:22 after a design that was used in the 1972 Munich Olympics. Israel reacted furiously to the ad saying, Adidas recently launched a new campaign for their shoes to highlight the 1972 Olympics. In Munich, 11 Israelis were murdered by Palestinian terrorists during the Munich Olympics. Guess who the face of their campaign is? Bela Hadid, a half-Palestinian model, who has a history of spreading anti-Semitism and calling for violence against Israelis and Jews. There's only one reason Adidas would hire the most beautiful woman in the world, and
Starting point is 00:24:46 that's to do subtle, esoteric, shoe-based anti-Semitism. On Monday, Adidas posted an Instagram apology, writing that its recent campaign was not meant to have any connection to the tragedy at the 1972 Olympics. I believe them. You can tell because there isn't one. It's been a while since I've seen the movie Munich, but as Spielberg tells it, the attack had very little to do with running shoes. Unfortunately, it's not a full apology in my eyes until it includes the words, we've been very bad-ed-ous.
Starting point is 00:25:18 Speaking of bad things, in the wake of Elon Musk's sit-down interview with Canada's weirdest man Jordan Peterson, in which Musk claims he was tricked into allowing his eldest child to transition, that child, Vivian, now 20, aired him out on threads. Vivian pointed to a tweet Musk wrote in the past in which he said that she was born gay and slightly autistic. And as someone who was born gay, and let's face it, with a little whiff of the spectrum on him, I take offense. Vivian says that the evidence, which is that she once described Elon's jacket as looking
Starting point is 00:25:48 fabulous when she was four years old, didn't happen and couldn't have happened because her father, quote, simply wasn't there, end quote, while she was growing up. Claiming children are gay and autistic instead of trans has become an increasingly common right-wing talking point. As her father's claim she isn't trans, Vivian concluded, I am legally recognized as a woman in the state of California and I don't concern myself with the opinions of those who are below me. Obviously, Elon can't say the same because in a ketamine-fueled haze,
Starting point is 00:26:12 he's desperate for attention and validation from an army of degenerate red-pilled incels and pycmies who are quick to give it to him. Go touch some fucking grass. If you're a father and your child doesn't go public with your ketamine problem, then congratulations, you landed the plane. And if your child's calling you by your first name on the internet while mocking your ketamine problem, you muffed it. Also how fun that Elon's trans kid is ten times the poster he could ever dream of being, and it's all happening on threats.
Starting point is 00:26:44 And finally, the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile was involved in a rollover crash in Illinois, though luckily no injuries were reported. The Wienermobile is still rolling over at this very moment to keep it at a juicy 140 degrees. Up next, Vice President Conway Harris definitely has time for this. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. I couldn't be more excited to bring out our next guest. She's had a whirlwind of a week, been traveling all over the country. It's obviously a miracle that she can make time for us, but here she is, existing in
Starting point is 00:27:24 the context of all in which she lives and what came before her. Please welcome my next president and yours, it's Vice President Kamala Harris. Oh, wow. Wow. Yeah. Nice.
Starting point is 00:27:40 Oh, what is it? ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"]
Starting point is 00:27:51 ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] ["Bad Night, Bad Night, Bad Night"] Madam Vice President, thank you so much for being here. This has been such an exciting week. Yeah. Everyone feels so hopeful and energized. It's like we all nearly went over a cliff and then we look straight down into it,
Starting point is 00:28:02 but Nancy Pelosi pulled us onto her shoulders and scrambled up a tree branch. We're not out of danger, but we feel like we've nearly went over a cliff and then we looked straight down into it, but Nancy Pelosi pulled us onto her shoulders and scrambled up a tree branch. We're not out of danger, but we feel like we've cheated death. So that feels good. What's it been like for you? You know, I just wanna say, okay, in case he's still on speakerphone, Joe, we love you.
Starting point is 00:28:21 Okay, and we are clear. You just, you never know with him. You know, I do want to thank Joe, okay, for making this selfless, patriotic decision. But that's just who the president is. You know, one time he offered me the last cough drop he had in his pocket. Isn't that nice? It was right before the debate, so in hindsight, I shouldn't have taken it. But here we are. You watch that debate back?
Starting point is 00:28:52 I did. Yeah. He sounded like Jennifer Coolidge. Had a cold. Is that what you sounded like? That's what you thought? That's what I... Yeah. Huh. Folks, I want a hot dog real bad. So in just a matter of days, your campaign raised more than $100 million. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:14 The youth are churning out Kamala fan cams on TikTok. People are fired up. Yeah. Did you expect this level of enthusiasm? Absolutely. Yeah. 100%. You know, I'm glad that young people are excited. Do you expect this level of enthusiasm? Absolutely. Yeah. 100%.
Starting point is 00:29:25 You know, I'm glad that young people are excited. America needs young people to be invested in our politics. And if that starts with singing about coconuts to the tune of Chappelle Rhone. Am I saying that right? Sure, yeah. Chappelle Rhone. I think it's, there's a, Chappelle Rhone.
Starting point is 00:29:44 Some people say chapel. If it's Chappelle Rhone, yeah. Chappelle, Ronan. I think it's, there's, it's, Chappelle wrong. Some people say chapel. If it's Chappelle wrong, I don't wanna be right. Okay. Okay. Okay. And if that's how we get young people excited, then I love that for us. Knee deep in the presidency,
Starting point is 00:30:01 Joe dropped out, now it's my turn. That's been floating around out there right yeah, yeah, no no that has been 100% yeah, no you're you're on it You're right on the pulse. They're eating pulse so The hard part of this election is not over the completely impossible boring yet terrifying sleep paralysis part seems to be over But the hard part is just beginning. How are you feeling about the challenges to come? You know, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it, okay? It's gonna be tough, right? Brat summer won't last forever.
Starting point is 00:30:35 And what comes after that? Rascal autumn? We don't even know what that is yet, John. But you're ready for whatever comes. I'm ready for whatever season. Even people who had incredible expectations for the kind of candidate you would be. I've been blown away by how you have hit the ground running,
Starting point is 00:30:55 taking in a matter of hours the mantle of defender of democracy with everybody hope on your shoulder, and you're rising to this occasion. How did you do that? How did I do that? I've been in hiding for three years I've been training getting better faster stronger laffer-er. Huh. That's how I did it. That's how you did it? You know, some of these, some of these Republicans have been actually saying insulting things about your laugh. How does that, that must be frustrating.
Starting point is 00:31:35 Yeah, no, that sucks. But honestly, I do think that's interesting because I don't think Donald Trump can laugh. Right. And I think that that's more fucked up than a woman who laughs when shit's funny. Than a man who can't, please. That is strange that we have never seen Donald Trump truly laugh in public. That is wild.
Starting point is 00:32:03 Yeah, what do you think that is? So people have tried to, I have tried to say, I've said this, we've never seen Donald Trump love and people send me what they consider the closest you can find. Is it that meme where he's like... If that's the best you got, he scoffs. He'll do some scoffing. But he doesn't laugh. What do you think that says about a man's mind? Broken, bad, un-good. Now what do you think about, like how are you gonna, so you have to do two tasks, you have a huge task out of you.
Starting point is 00:32:34 One is to make the whole Democratic coalition that turned out to defeat Donald Trump the first time and the second time turn out for you. But then there's a lot of moderate voters, undecided voters that are just getting to know you yeah are you ready to are you ready to make the case to those undecided voters I feel like I am I'm so memeable I'm everywhere they can't get rid of me I'll be in the Midwest I'll get a white guy whatever that's what
Starting point is 00:33:01 they want fine I'll get a white guy. Which one? Elmer's. Just a glue. Just pasty. Just like as pasty. Yeah. Pete Glutigej. That was really good. Thanks. Thanks. So. Glutidge. Glutidge. I'm going to get that crocheted on a pillow. Yeah. Yeah. I'm rubber.
Starting point is 00:33:34 You're Pete Glutidge. That's nothing. Sorry. Sorry, I'm nervous. I'm talking to the vice president. I'm talking to the next president of the United States. Thank you. So Republicans have already begun throwing some pretty racist
Starting point is 00:33:47 misogynist spaghetti at the wall trying to figure out how to attack you. One of them is your laugh. The other is that they've started taking to calling you some kind of a, they want to call you a DEI hire. DEI hire. I think that that is interesting. Cause I could arrest all of them. I won't, but will I?
Starting point is 00:34:05 It's funny, I'm glad you brought... All of them. You know, one of the criticisms of your 2020 campaign is that you didn't want to run as a prosecutor when there was a kind of progressive fervor in the party at that time in which people thought that that might be a liability. Obviously Republicans have been throwing a lot of pretty absurd and disgusting attacks your way. But some people have even gone so far as to say that impressions of you right are racist or misogynist.
Starting point is 00:34:52 How do you feel about that? True. Yeah. Anyone doing an impression of me is a racist homophobe, honestly. Wow. Probably never ate pussy. He's probably never ate pussy. But so, I mean, are you worried that people are a little too hopeful that at some point this moment is going to give way? And gonna crescendo, like it's gonna go bye bye? Yeah, it's gonna peak.
Starting point is 00:35:23 Sometimes I wonder if, I found glass in my mouth a couple weeks ago. And I wonder if I died. And that this is a dream. Did that answer that for you? Sure. Yeah. So, we already started touching on this,
Starting point is 00:35:42 but let's talk about your VP pick for a second. Right. Elmer. Can you give us a little bit more on who you might be leaning towards? Give us a little scoop. Any scoops? A little scoop? Got any scoops for us?
Starting point is 00:35:54 Scoops? You want a little scoop? Yeah. You know, I am looking for someone to compliment me. Just whoever's going to tell me I look really nice. Just someone who's going to be like, you're so smart. It's really nice that you laugh, stuff like that. So like, yeah, to compliment you, to serve as some.
Starting point is 00:36:11 Yeah, I see what you mean. Have you know one of them is an astronaut, Mark Kelly. Yeah. No, I like that, because he did the gorilla suit thing. That was him. Yes. That's him? Yes. That's fun. He better not do that shit to me, though.
Starting point is 00:36:29 When Senator Mark Kelly was an astronaut aboard, I believe, the International Space Station, he without his other astronauts on board knowing had brought us his special item, I guess, a full gorilla suit and then put it on and terrorize his fellow astronauts. That's cool. Hilarious. That's so funny and fucked up, imagine. You're in space. You're in space.
Starting point is 00:36:57 For months, weeks, it's just you and the few other people there. And then there's a gorilla. That's awesome. Do you know that the International Space Station apparently has a kind of gross smell from all the people that have been on there not showering for so many years?
Starting point is 00:37:19 I didn't need to know that. Well, I mean, you're going to be in charge of NASA. It might be something you need to look into. The smell? Yeah, the smell aboard the International Space Station. It's not not a problem. OK, yeah. I'll tell them to stop smelling like a GameStop.
Starting point is 00:37:35 And I feel like they're a bigger fish to fry, honestly. But yeah, cool. get some Febreze. Wow, that's a good idea. Now, you're about to head out, this is the most consequential 100 days that any candidate has ever had. A week ago, you were not a candidate, now you have 100 days to make your case to the country.
Starting point is 00:38:04 Is there any piece of that makes you nervous? No, not at all. Because, okay, look. A week ago, I didn't exist in the context. But now I exist in the context. I did not fall out of the coconut tree. You know what I mean? No, I do know what you mean.
Starting point is 00:38:20 Yeah. You're unburdened. I'm unburdened by what has been. Exactly. I do know what you mean. Yeah. You're unburdened. I'm unburdened by what has been. Exactly. Vice President Kamala Harris, everybody. Thank you. OK.
Starting point is 00:38:32 Everybody give it up for Alison Reese. And we're back. Please welcome to the stage singer, performer, drag icon, co-host of Sibling Rivalry and one of the founders of the brand new drag pack, the incredible Mona X Change. Hold on, John. You forgot gorgeous. And gorgeous. I should have said gorgeous.
Starting point is 00:39:04 Thank you for being here. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being here. What happened here? Just like I'm messy. I think she that's part of it. That's part of it. Lovely to see you. So now before we get into it, I something did happen on this show that does involve your cohost,
Starting point is 00:39:19 which is this your cohost, Bob the drag queen did our pride show in twenty twenty two. Bob comes on the pod. She very clearly has absolutely no idea what this show is. And then goes back to you and talks about having no fucking idea what this show is. And then you try to explain it. You get it wrong. Did I get it wrong? Yes, because you thought that somehow I can't remember the details,
Starting point is 00:39:41 but in some sense you confused me with Jon Favreau and believed we were in some kind of a relationship. Okay, so I listened to Potsdam America. I'm obsessed with you and Jon Favreau. But I remember I fell in love with Jon Favreau through some MSNBC something. I was like, who's that? Then I found out that, then I don't know what happened.
Starting point is 00:40:01 Then for some reason, I thought that you and Jon Favreau were an item, a couple. And I was like, girl, you went on Jon Lovett's podcast. That is Jon Favreau's husband. And so, and am I wrong? Yeah, he said no. So now you have started Drag Pack. Yes.
Starting point is 00:40:20 Which is really exciting. Can you just talk about like, what is it? How did it come together? So it's a political action committee and it's a pack come together with Queens and we are here to Essentially initiate to to get Gen Z obsessed with policies and get them into this whole bit because we realize that Gen Z is a huge voting block and a lot of Our fans happen to be Gen Z, you know because drag is fierce and they're really engaged so we just we felt like we could be most useful
Starting point is 00:40:46 in this political cycle and hopefully beyond by activating them to getting them excited about politics and having them do the work with us. Nice. Yeah. And I, being a Gen Z girly, why y'all laughing? I'm making jokes. No. I wish. Look, we're just two Gen Z girly. Why y'all laughing? I'm Uncle Joe.
Starting point is 00:41:09 We're just two Gen Z girlies. So first of all, has this week been a bit easier in terms of the recruitment? Oh my god, yes. Like it's so crazy how we're everyone, like it feels like Gen Z has gotten so much more excited about this political cycle because old Uncle Joe said, you know, I'm gonna sit this one out. Like, to be honest, like even through our Instagram and everything, people are saying like they have not been this excited since Obama in a very long time. So I feel like that is a really, we have a lot of momentum. A lot of people
Starting point is 00:41:40 are, hey listen, Beyonce and Taylor ain't even saying nothing yet. I know, and they're still loaded up. I know. Well, Beyonce gave approval for the song. She did. And Beyonce's mom posted the photo, I believe. Oh, she did? You follow Miss Tina? I follow people who follow Miss Tina.
Starting point is 00:41:57 OK, got you, yeah. So when Beyonce and Taylor get on track, girl, Gen Z's about to fuck, oh sorry, can I curse on you? Yeah. They about to fuck it up sorry can the curse on you? Yeah. Oh, they about to fuck it up in this month. They don't really know what to do, it's going to be good. Yeah. So, Project 2025 I think is one of the motivating reasons
Starting point is 00:42:14 for forming this pack. It seems like Trump had to say he had tried to disavow Project 2025. The Democratic candidates have started talking more about it but it seems like it was organic. Like people were bringing up Project 2025 on their own. Like have you found that when you're organizing The Democratic candidates have started talking more about it, but it seems like it was organic. People were bringing up Project 2025 on their own. Have you found that when you're organizing this drag pack that people are talking about
Starting point is 00:42:31 Project 2025? You know, 100%. I think through social media and through, I know they're trying to shut it down and squander it, but through things like TikTok, people are getting a lot of information through social media. And I think we cannot ignore that. Like people are not ignorant anymore. Like this, like you wake up in the morning and you brush your teeth hopefully and then you open your phone like you see 19 TikToks about the information and this stupid 900 word triple space size
Starting point is 00:43:00 15 Comic Sans document and you're like, oh wow, like the information is here. So I think that people are coming to us with information about Project 2025 that we don't even know. So I think it's great, it's great that they know already. Because I know me, old 18 year old, 22, 25 year old, Monet girl, I wasn't worried about that. I was on Craigslist, I wasn't talking about no Projects, y'all don't even know what that is, see? They gave it away. You have to just be like, look, as someone who doesn't remember 9-11,
Starting point is 00:43:29 then go from there. So now, before we get to the game, I want to talk about JD Vance's guyliner. Oh God. That is like he's wearing gender affirming makeup. But I like how you're, you're how you're concentrating on the guy liner. Look at the bad filler, though. You know what I mean? You think? You got this by Dr. 90210. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:43:52 Dr. Zizmor fucked him up, girl. Dr. Zizmor, man, you're doing it again. You're doing it. Does Gen Z know about Dr. Zizmor? Gen Z, do you know about Dr. Zizmor in New York? No, you don't. You're not Gen Z. Stop it, girl. You're wearing Hollister, stop it honey. From opening the library to read,
Starting point is 00:44:12 to reading at an actual fucking library, to America's children, queer people are more than just fabulous outfits, impeccable lip syncs, and catty feuds. But we're definitely those things too. Monet, what would you say is your all time favorite beef from Drag Race? Ooh, my all-time favorite beef, it would have to be season four,
Starting point is 00:44:30 and it was Sharon Needles versus Fifi O'Hara. It is good old, like, Drag Race in its prime, just Fifi, Sharon would inhale. Bitch, why the fuck you inhaling, girl? Like, it was crazy, and I mean, toxic me, I just love, I literally go back and just watch the fights on all those stupid Miss Mojo YouTube drinking videos. Obsessed. So good.
Starting point is 00:44:51 Now there is one group that is more quick to a nasty public fight than drag queens and it's the Republican party, which is why we're playing a game we're calling, which bitch? That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. Which is why we're playing a game we're calling which bitch.
Starting point is 00:45:09 That's a good one. That's a good art. That's good. I'm going to describe a beef to you and you will tell us, am I describing a squabble between drag queens or a fight between elected Republican officials? So let us play which bitch, a consummate professional passionately informs a colleague that she does not take money from a benefactor but she could if she wanted to. Oh that is 1000% Shangela. Yeah that's correct. Yeah that's Shangela. The legendary sugar daddy. I could have a sugar daddy if I wanted to have a sugar daddy.
Starting point is 00:45:41 I could have. But yeah I don't know the rest of it. Next up, an old school diva, some might consider a husband, Savage is an unhinged colleague after being interrupted during an interview. Is that Maxine Waters? No, it is a political event. It is Republican Queens.
Starting point is 00:45:57 Yeah, so I mean, okay. Let's give a check. A ding. Ding. It was this. You know, he looks very unhinged. I mean, a lot of people have concerns about him. And I'm not sure if he's on something, but I do hope he gets the help that he needs.
Starting point is 00:46:13 Fucking, that is the cattiest, fucking bitchiest Kevin Gra- I hope he gets a- that's like a, oh, poor child, you know? What CNN needs to do is add the shady rattlesnake noise sound to the thing. It'll be great. The news will be fun again. It'll be good. Oh, man, that'd be awesome. People would complain.
Starting point is 00:46:35 They'd say, oh, this isn't reality. It's like, okay, all right, let's keep pretending. Let's keep pretending this is news. I just add RuPaul to the house of represent. Ladies, silence. Let's keep pretending this is news. I just add RuPaul to the house of represent ladies. Silence. Basically, Nancy Pelosi was in the RuPaul role for the last two weeks. This fiery prima donna called a colleague Tubby
Starting point is 00:46:54 and a little bitch on social media. Oh, that is 1000% Republicans. Yeah, that's right. That's representative Derek Van Orden also going after Matt Gaetz. So good. A little bitch. Next up, two Titans clash after accusations of arrogance on a national stage. Drag queens?
Starting point is 00:47:17 Yep. That's Candy Muse versus... Oh yeah, Tamisha Iman. Tamisha Iman in season 13, Untucked. Yeah. That most likely one untucked its Emmy for outstanding unstructured reality program. I believe we have a clip. Cause you gonna say you call me arrogant
Starting point is 00:47:29 and like you don't like me bitch, you don't know me from a mother f***ing hole in the wall. All right. So I said yes. I'm not gonna beat too many bitches. Yes the hell you are. You got the right one. Yes the hell you are baby.
Starting point is 00:47:37 I'm not gonna beat too many bitches. Like I said. I'm obsessed with Candymew saying anything. So good. Rararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararar calling them a damn fool. A jacked blonde that has to mean a miss M.T.G. It is. It is. It is. Girl. So for Mike Johnson to actually think that his Republican conference supports sending 60 billion dollars to Ukraine, he is a damn fool, Steve. And he's a liar. Hold on, hold on. Can I tell you something? I have a ring, we all have ring cameras. Tell me why I saw this bleach blonde bad built butch lady stealing my packages from my front
Starting point is 00:48:35 door. And when I tell you she hopped over my neighbor's Ficus ranch and tuck and rolled onto my front yard and sold a package. I said, bitch you deserve that.our yes but it was like a pretty bleach blonde horrible wig she had on and I was like you know what Ferris you're in that can ask a personal question yeah what was the package it was an August lock and ironically a lock I know and some loop oh what a funny thing to open up be like well I hope.
Starting point is 00:49:05 Like, if you open it, you really, that's specific. It's very specific. Well, the lube isn't that specific. Everybody likes lube, but the lock is. She can't use it. I'm like, at least you open it, you can't use it. Just run back and just throw it and run away. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:49:19 Like, I guess I can't use it. Yeah, give it back. Just give it back. It's not valuable. I don't know what the, that's not, it wasn't a hall. It was an exciting thing to tell. Terrible beach blonde butch body. It's really no bleach blonde bad built butch body bleach blonde bad built butch body. It's too much to say. Each blonde bleep bleach blonde bad built butch body. Say what now? Bleach, bleach blonde, bad built butch body. So good. Honestly, Jasmine Crockett should be the next poet laureate for that one. Okay. She really should be. I want
Starting point is 00:49:53 her to give the poem at Kamala's inaugural. Oh, now just, just, I hadn't even thought about a poet at Kamala's inaugural. It's just a fun thing to think about. We got to, we got to stay in the fucking game. We got to stay focused. We got to stay focused. Can't think about that now. We can't think about that poem. Can't think about it. It's not worth thinking about.
Starting point is 00:50:13 How can people support? Where is the drag pack going to be? What's it doing? So yeah, go to dragpack.org and you guys, we have a list of ways that you can help support us, get the word out about us and support the causes that we interested in because you guys, we have a list of ways that you can help support us, get the word out about us, and support the causes that we're interested in. Because there's a lot of anti-drag, anti-trans legislation going up out there. And a lot of this anti-drag legislation is just anti-trans legislation, just colored
Starting point is 00:50:35 up in words, kind of mask it. So we are always fighting for those in our community who are the least served, and we try to make the biggest impact. So dragpack.org. Can everybody go to dragpack.org? I also like, you know, whether or not it's the most salient and effective way to convince a middle-aged person in the Midwest who voted for Trump,
Starting point is 00:50:55 then Biden is kind of not sure where they're gonna land. Regardless, like the way in which Project 2025 uses trans issues as a backdoor way to talk about regulating speech is so dangerous. I don't think people have fully under like people talk about the way in which they will take over different parts of the federal government. People talk about how project 2025 calls for invoking the Comstock act to make sending abortion medication illegal. They talk about a lot of different aspects of it. I do not think people have focused yet enough.
Starting point is 00:51:25 People have even talked about the fact that it talks about banning pornography, but people do not understand that the document makes clear that what is pornography to them? It can be anything that refers to gender ideology and that it is not protected by the First Amendment. And if you combine that with what Clarence Thomas is saying about needing to use the tradition of the First Amendment
Starting point is 00:51:45 to interpret whether or not the First Amendment applies, you start to see a very dangerous path in which laws ostensibly or, you know, deceptively, misleadingly, disgustingly defined as protecting children from harm are used to ban not just drag shows, not even just the right of trans people to get medicine, but to contain everybody's freedom of speech, everybody's ability to access the care they need, everybody's ability to live as they see. So I'm really glad that you guys are doing drag pack. It's an amazing thing. More people should get involved and it makes it fun, you know? And it's like,
Starting point is 00:52:18 so thank you for doing that. Monet exchange everybody, drag pack.org. Monet's gonna stick around when we come back. We're all proud to be an American. Don't go anywhere. Just love it or leave it and there's more on the way. And we're back! And also black. We're back. We're black. This week was historic. We have the power to stop Donald Trump in the existential threat he poses. Now is the time to join Vote Save America's 2024 volunteer program.
Starting point is 00:52:55 So far, over 27,000 people have signed up, including 10,000 since Sunday. And those folks have already reached out to over 1 million voters. We're about 100 days away from the election your participation will make a difference at a time when the people we need are cynical and the people we need don't trust the news. They don't trust politicians knocking on doors, making phone calls, sending text, doing the face to face person to person work is going to matter so so much. So go to vote save America dot com slash twenty twenty four and click sign up to get started. We haven't signed up yet. com slash 2024 and click sign up to get started. If you haven't signed up yet, maybe because the last couple of weeks were a stone cold bummer, bummer's over. This message has been paid for by Vote Save America. You can learn more at votesaveamerica.com
Starting point is 00:53:33 and this ad has not been authorized by any candidate or candidates committee. All right, please welcome Allison Reese to the stage for the first time. Lovely to see you. Lovely to see you for the first time. Lovely to see you. Thank you for being here. Hello. All right.
Starting point is 00:53:49 Tonight, in honor of a great week, great week in politics and the start of the Olympics, we're going to do what the Olympics does best, a light, not a kind of nationalistic fervor in a segment we're calling, Oh, Say Can You Spin? Pretty good. Pretty good. There we are in those little coats.
Starting point is 00:54:10 I remember that day. Yeah, that was such a fun day. That was such an honor. That was so good. I was jealous that you were in front. Sorry. Do you remember the potato salad they had at Crafty? Yes.
Starting point is 00:54:20 It was so good. It was so good. Even though the raisins were there, it was so good. The raisins were there and I I said a white person did this. I know. I'm like, OK, Chad, we got you, girl. OK. I thought people would like raisins.
Starting point is 00:54:32 All right. Bye. All right. Here's how it works. We're going to spin this wheel, and then we're just going to share something that makes us feel patriotic. Because we're taking patriotism back from these people. Let's spin the wheel.
Starting point is 00:54:47 Oh, I love this patriotic wheel. Oh, Allison. Oh yeah, I forgot. We have an eagle. You have to hold the eagle while you speak. Oh, very normal. Very normal. very good. I'm really excited to finally feel patriotic about being booked. I'm excited to you know do this show to get attention. I'm the middle of six kids.
Starting point is 00:55:26 So I feel like it's, uh, the universe paying me back in interest with all of this attention I have right now. I love that. The, the moment I saw that the president Biden was endorsing vice president Harris and that everybody was rallying behind her, I don't think it was the first thought, but it wasn't the tenth. It was like the sixth thought I had was like, Alice is going to crush. This is a good time. It's a good time to be Alice in Reese.
Starting point is 00:55:52 And then, and then, and then I was like, God, she's good. This is awesome. Because people were saying Maya Rudolph, Maya Rudolph. I was like, okay, I guess. And then what do I see? The New York Times has a story about you doing Kamua. Thank you so much. And even better, they use a picture of us together.
Starting point is 00:56:11 They did! It is the picture I sent them. Hell yeah it is. What were thoughts two through five? So the first thought is this is awesome. The second thought is, I must be missing something that's terribly wrong. The third thought is, no, no, don't do that. Don't do that. Take this in.
Starting point is 00:56:32 Exist in this context. In the context. Yeah, you are unburdened by what has been. Who's up next, let's see. I'm gonna get some next. Monet, you get the eagle. You have the talking eagle. What is something you're patriotic about?
Starting point is 00:56:49 This is deceptively light. Yeah, I'm a remember. No, no. It's just internet trash. Something that I'm patriotic about is going to Target. Okay? Like there is, I don't feel more American than I walk, than when I set on a mission
Starting point is 00:57:06 to go to Target to buy two or three things and I walk out with 95 things, right? I just feel like I am an American. I have the ability and the freedom to walk up to this Target when I budgeted $25 and I'm spending 500. It makes me feel like I'm in my American power and I'm doing my civic duty as an American spending money up in this motherfucker
Starting point is 00:57:27 and I feel good about it. Yeah. Target. Target. Target. I love that. I love that. Let's spin it again. It has landed on me. So I want to talk about something I'm patriotic about, which is the way that the United States enters in the opening ceremony of every Olympics.
Starting point is 00:57:56 It is one of my favorite times of the Olympics and one of my favorite moments every four years because first of all all I don't know how Ralph Lauren always gets this fucking contract but we send our people out there like they always look like the villains in a Mighty Duck movie you know they they look like they work for the person that's gonna beat Rocky like they're so appointed and even though I always I always feel that about the uniforms, the best moment is it's like, you know, a few people from this country, a few people like this from that country.
Starting point is 00:58:30 And then we send in so many fucking people and I love it every time. I love it. I love how many Americans start marching through there. Like just like a whole fucking, just more than any other country. And it's like, you can't see the end of it. You know what I mean? Like France sends in their couple dozen and then and then what happens? Just an unfucking phalanx of Americans just one after another.
Starting point is 00:58:54 And they're all so they're all so good looking. I love that about us. And I love that we just like, you know, the Swedes get to do a couple of sports. They're like, I hope we can beat that American in that sport that we invented and is the only one we do. And it's like, maybe if you're lucky, but we Swedes brought that sport to America about 120 years ago and we're good at that too. And everybody's so smug about soccer for so long.
Starting point is 00:59:21 And it's like, sorry, we got a little interested. Now you're fucked. And I like it. Thank you. Are we good at soccer? We're good at soccer too? I'm not sure. Okay.
Starting point is 00:59:38 Simone Biles goes so high up and it's like, and it's like, what are you thinking when you're up there? You know, like left, left, left, right, down, up. How do you think through it? Oh yeah, she's fully doing a Mortal Kombat finish him at the end. Yes. She's like putting in a Mortal Kombat fatality.
Starting point is 00:59:53 Absolutely. She's like, Donda, back, back, circle, circle, Sub-Zero wishes. You know, he could never. Sub-Zero could never. Raiden could never. I'm too young for that reference. Same.
Starting point is 01:00:07 Just three Gen Z girlies. Just three patriotic Gen Z girlies. And that is, Osei, can you spin? One more time for Monet Exchange. One more time for Alice in Reese. One more time for Vice President Kamala Harris. When we come back, we'll end on a high note.
Starting point is 01:00:32 And we're back! Because we all need it this week, here it is, the high note. Hey, love it. It's Evan in Seattle. Last summer, my recovery was on the rocks and I left school without my bachelor's, but now I have a fun job. I married Gabrielle, my partner, four years in February, and we're living together now. I'm a non-binary technician. He's a genderqueer artist. It's awesome. A Certain Kind, his documentary about a queer feminist porn collective in Portland, just got into its third film festival. I know this is a lot of stuff, but the big high note is this. He was here from Mexico on a student visa, and if you've seen the movie Problemista, it's very much like that.
Starting point is 01:01:10 Really stressful. Graduating from Cornish meant no visa, so we filed for his green card after our wedding in March, and it arrived last week with no interview. That's so lucky. Right out of college, he's allowed to work in the USA. If the worst happens in November, we might not be safe, but it's a start. I think about that all the time and listening to you guys talk helps me deal. We're making our family. Starting with two adorable baby kittens, Jami and Mouse. Gabriel's Instagram, TodaLaPapita, has pictures of them every day. And you can check out his work there too.
Starting point is 01:01:43 Things are looking up and I'm so glad I can support Gabriel and following his dream. It's my dream too now. Thanks for listening. Bye. Thanks everybody who's sending a high note tonight. If you want to send us a message about something that gave you hope you can send us a voice memo to lowlyhighnotes at gmail.com or if you're a Friend of the Pod subscriber, which you should be, you can leave it in the Friend of the Pod Discord in the Love It or Leave It channel. And that is our show! Thank you so much to Alison Rees and Monet Exchange. There are 100 days, 100 days until the 2024 election.
Starting point is 01:02:15 If you haven't signed up at vote save america.com slash 2024, do it this weekend. Alright, have a great night. Thanks, everybody. executive producer Chris Lord is our producer and Kennedy Hill is our associate producer Hallie Kiefer is our head writer Sarah Lazarus and Jocelyn Kaufman Peter Miller Alan Pierre Will Miles and Mohana Del Shiki are our writers Evan Sutton is our editor Kyle Seglen and Charlotte Landis provide audio support Stephen Colon is our audio engineer and Milo Kim is our videographer our theme song is written and performed by sure sure thanks to our designer Bernardo Serna for creating and running all of our visuals which you can't see because this is a podcast and to our digital, Bernardo Serna, for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast. And to our digital producers, David Tolles, Claudia Shang, Mia Kelman and Matt DeGroote
Starting point is 01:03:08 for filming and editing video each week so you can. Love it or leave it. It's love it or leave it.

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