Lovett or Leave It - Dictator Says What?

Episode Date: December 9, 2023

The sun might set at 3:30pm right now, but Lovett or Leave It keeps the lights on all night long over at the Sirius Garage in Los Angeles, California. Benny Safdie stops by to Curse out Lovett. McKenzie Goodwin and Rachel Scanlon give 2023 a long, lingering, lesbian look back. Zainab Johnson has twelve siblings, but only one can be the winner, and the Rant Wheel has these bottoms spinning like a top over tell-all books, swimsuits, and gift guides for the sapphic set. For a closed-captioned version of this episode, click here. For a transcript of this episode, please email [e-mail] and include the name of the podcast.

What's up everybody? Alright. Welcome to Love It or Leave It. The team is back in LA and we return from our long and winding journey like Odysseus, wondering who's been fucking our wives. We've got a great show for you. Benny Safdie is here to chat and make me uncomfortable. Probably.

Not that that's hard to do, but he's good at it. Mackenzie Goodwin and Rachel Scanlon, a.k.a. the two dykes of two dykes and a mic, are going to look back at the sapphic news of 2023, which I'm not super plugged into, to be honest. Ryan Grimm wrote a book about the squad. So we're going to find out who they are. And the hilarious Zainab Johnson, who is one of 12 siblings, So we're going to find out who they are.

And the hilarious Zainab Johnson, who is one of 12 siblings, will help me decide who's the best sibling of all. Plus, the rant wheel. But first, let's get into it. What a week. On Wednesday, former House Speaker Kevin McCarthy announced that he will not be seeking re-election and will be retiring at the end of December. McCarthy said he looks forward to spending more time with his family, elbowing them in the kidneys. Stay strong, my friend, said disgraced former Representative George Santos in a cameo McCarthy bought when he was drunk. Patrick McHenry, the temporary Speaker of the House before Mike Johnson, also announced this week that he'll retire at the end of his term, said,

McHenry, I look forward to spending more time with my temporary family. It's the same joke twice. Meanwhile, Doug Burgum. Yep, who? Ended his bid for the 2024 presidential nomination this week, days before the Republican debate. So let us pay homage to a man who gave us so many incredible moments on the campaign trail.

Congressman James Comer accused President Biden of being on China's payroll based on payments between Hunter Biden's law firm and Joe Biden, despite the fact that the payments are already publicly on the record and documented as being loan repayments for Hunter's truck. Comer said that the three payments of $1,380 prove a direct link from China to Joe Biden, as Hunter's law firm had previously done work with the Chinese companies. I know that every time I see $4,140, I think, man, whoever's got this kind of money must be an international spy. There, Chairman Comer goes again, reheating what is old as new to try to revive his shame of an investigation. Hunter's lawyer said in a statement,

the truth is Hunter's father helped him when Hunter was struggling financially and due to his addiction and could not secure credit to finance a truck. When Hunter was able to, he repaid his father back and took over the payments himself. That's why that's why the money changed hands. It's all documented. They're getting pretty close. If Republicans can just remind voters just a few more times about what a loving father Joe Biden is, his reelection is toast. Awkwardly paying your 81-year-old father back for a car loan he gave you because you ruined your credit doing coke is culturally how white men show their affection. What are Republicans going to uncover next? Joe Venmo'd Hunter some money to buy Gatorade when he had a hangover? Oh, no.

The memo line was, I love you, son. I'm sure this is what I would say if it was Eric or Don Jr. Last month, an RFK Jr. spokesperson told Newsweek that the presidential hopeful had flown but once on Jeffrey Epstein's plane with his second wife-to-be, Mary Richardson Kennedy, in 1993. The couple said nothing was inappropriate or unusual about the flight, except that the entire flight crew was in some sort of air travel training program called high school. During an interview with Fox News this week, there's something that happens where when you guys do an ooh, Brian does an impish little titter that you hear underneath. During an interview with Fox News this week, however, RFK Jr. told Jesse Waters that it was actually two separate flights, one of which was a fossil hunting trip.

My wife had some kind of relationship with Glenn Maxwell and... Thank you. Thank you. All joking aside, RFK Jr. should have known better than to bring kids on Jeffrey Epstein's plane. That's Jeffrey Epstein's job. Jr. should have known better than to bring kids on Jeffrey Epstein's plane. That's Jeffrey Epstein's job. At a fundraising event Tuesday, President Biden acknowledged, if Trump wasn't running, I'm not sure I'd be running, adding, we cannot let him win. And given how these two grandpas walk, they definitely should not try running. Two tough walks.

Sean Hannity sat down with Donald Trump Tuesday night for a Fox News town hall and tried unsuccessfully to reassure America that Trump definitely, absolutely will not be a dictator if he gets elected again. Do you in any way have any plans whatsoever, if re-elected president, to abuse power, to break the law, to use the government to go after people. You mean like they're using right now? So he answers the question with a question. All right. So that's he's he's missed softball. Number one. Later, Sean Hannity attempted to set up Trump again to say definitively on the record that he would not be a dictator. Under no circumstances, you are promising America tonight. You would never abuse power as retribution

against anybody. Except for day one. This interview is like somebody's passing the ball for an easy layup and then that person just swallows the basketball. Well, Hannity tried to interject and say, no, no, of course he won't be a dictator. Trump laid out his day one dictator plans. He says, you're not going to be a dictator, are you? I said, no, no, of course he won't be a dictator, Trump laid out his day one dictator plans. He says, you're not going to be a dictator, are you? I said, no, no, no, other than day one. We're closing the border and we're drilling, drilling, drilling. After that, I'm not a dictator.

So we have nothing to worry about. Trump will be a dictator for one day, get it all out of his system, and that'll be that. Reassured? I know that I am. Alabama Senator Tommy Tuberville announced Tuesday

that he will end his months-long blockade of military promotions, finally clearing the way for hundreds to be approved. There's an important lesson here. Give up. John Fetterman bought a George Santos cameo for indicted New Jersey Senator Bob Menendez this week. Hey, Bobby. Uh, look. I don't think I need to tell you, but these people that want to make you get in trouble and want to kick you out and make you run away, you make them put up or shut up.

You stand your ground, sir, and don't get bogged down by all the haters out there. Stay strong. Merry Christmas. All right. That's enough online time for this week. Call your representatives and tell them to go take a long walk in the woods. I don't know how I feel about the George George Santos cameos because, no, we shouldn't be giving this guy money just because he's entertaining as if it's all reality TV. But at the same time, I've bought several.

Vice President Vice President Kamala Harris has broken the record for casting the most tie-breaking votes in the Senate's history. Said Harris, That'd be cool. In November, Sultan al-Jubeir of the UAE, who heads the country's state-owned oil company, said, There is no science out there, or no scenario out there, that says the phase-out of fossil fuels is what's going to achieve 1.5, referring to the need to reduce carbon emissions to prevent global average temperatures from rising more than 1.5 degrees Celsius. That's, of course, classic for the head of a Middle Eastern state-run fossil fuel conglomerate. One problem, he's also chairing the COP28 Global Climate Summit. Should a leader of an oil company with a vested interest in

increasing carbon emissions run the conference where we try to cut carbon emissions? We say yes. People wear multiple hats. I host Love It or Leave It in my working hours, and in my spare time, I leave mean comments on Love It or Leave It's videos so the team doesn't get complacent. George W. Bush paints, and they're pretty good. People can be more than one thing. New Hampshire Republicans have introduced a 15-day abortion ban. The bill has no exceptions

for rape or incest. In other news, New Hampshire has changed its official motto from live free or die to die. The Biden administration has promised $3 billion

to help begin construction of a high-speed rail line between Las Vegas and Los Angeles. The rail line will even have a special 6 a.m. Monday departure called the Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,

I'm so fucked Express. New York City will ramp the Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, I'm So Fucked Express. New York City will ramp up its use of noise cameras, which work like speed cameras to issue tickets to cars with modified mufflers, loud motorcycles, and excessive honkers, with violations costing between $800 and $2,500. Of course, if you ask me, honkers could never be excessive. This guy knows what I'm talking about. Oh, and let me tell you. Last time I was at NYC, I saw a broad on the subway. I can't believe how much of this we left in.

A broad on the subway who would have gotten tickets for excessive honkers, if you know what I mean. This guy knows what I'm talking about. You got a loud car. Now you got a ticket from Mayor Adams. The noise cameras begin recording when they register a sound louder than 85 decibels, roughly as loud as a lawnmower. New Yorkers have protested this decision by the city, given that 85 decibels is lower than the average New Yorker's speaking voice.

A city council candidate in Rainier, Washington lost his election by a single vote after failing to vote for himself. And we've got somebody to remind Biden to vote for himself, right? There's somebody on that? The candidate, Damian Green, who lost 246 to 247, told the Washington Post that he didn't feel right

casting a ballot for himself because it's not about me, it's about the people. Then he just cried and cried and cried. Added Green, Green's opponent, Ryan Roth, a landfill manager, told the Post, It just came down to my vote, I guess. Hey, when the guy who runs the landfill is better at tooting his own horn than you,

take some horn lessons, you know? Green said he realized during a town hall that he and Roth's politics aligned, saying, license, you know? Green said he realized during a town hall that he and Roth's politics aligned, saying, I really didn't campaign much just because I knew if either one of us won, the city would win. It was a win-win. So wholesome. Win-win. If only every election could be like this. 2024 is more of a win-gulag. A house in Arlington, Virginia exploded on Monday night after police tried to serve a warrant to the occupant who had fired a flare gun from inside the house 30 or 40 times into the neighborhood. Shit.

I haven't seen a house this messed up since the House of Friggin' Representatives. This guy knows what I'm talking about. Time magazine is named Taylor Swift, their person of the year. This is part of a negotiated settlement. Swifties are expected to start releasing hostages once the issue hits the newsstands. Kim Kardashian will reportedly star as a high-powered divorce lawyer in Ryan Murphy's latest show, A Sexy Adult Procedural.

Sexy Adult Procedural? That's how my wife convinces me to get a colonoscopy every year. My God, I love that woman. I don't know. I don't know. Paramount Plus PR reps abruptly ended a BBC interview with Kelsey Grammer about his Frasier reboot after the conversation turned to Grammer's ongoing support for Donald Trump. Grammer reportedly said, a fascist dictatorship. I'm listening. I'm listening. There was a Marist joke we cut. That you would have wanted. All right. According to new lawsuit,

Panera's charged lemonade is allegedly responsible for a second death after a 46-year-old man drank three of the extremely caffeinated drinks and went into cardiac arrest. Panera charged lemonade kills once. Shame on Panera. Panera charged lemonade kills twice.

Shame on Panera still. Interestingly, they call it charged lemonade because it has been charged with involuntary manslaughter. And finally this week, Riz, a slang term that's popular on TikTok, was named 2023 Oxford University Press Word of the Year. And if you're not sure what that means, don't forget to stretch before bed tonight.

We come back. A cursed conversation. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. Joining us now, a man I'm equal parts wildly jealous of and creatively inspired by. Put your hands together for director, actor, writer, and jack-of-all-trades, Benny Safdie. How's it going? It's good to see you. Good to see you, too. Thank you.

You were on the Tonight Show yesterday. Yes, I was. That was fun. This is the same. Well, this is the afternoon show, right? I see. That's how he does it. Look at that. Look at his mind turning. Look at that. What? No, that was really good. You wore bright silver. You were painted head to toe in silver.

Was I? To be on The Tonight Show. I was, yes. Do you like attention? Well, it was more, I wanted to see, it was almost like a, my mission statement, if you will, was, will people take me seriously if I look like that? And the goal was to see if we could just do the interview normally, dressed head to toe in silver. And do you think you did it normally?

I believe I did. I fully forgot towards the end of the segment that I was silver. That was the strangest part because in the clip I saw, it's unaddressed. Completely unaddressed. We addressed it in the beginning because the idea was I did do it. I was out in Rockefeller Center and I was performing for people

nobody gave me any money but I got a lot of photos taken with me and that was great and so I figured afterwards I might as well go on to the

Tonight Show you know that's cool yeah I love the curse by the way thank you it's really great and

I can tell all the people here love it too wow hundreds of people loved it now It's really great. I can tell all the people here love it, too. Wow. Hundreds of people loved it. I can't even see back there. So here's what I was thinking about when I was watching The Curse, because I know you really like reality TV. Love it.

And I was struck. I have a hard time saying love it now. No, it's because it's on the screen. I know. I see it every time. Here's the thing you don't understand how often the phrase love it is just used in life i know you don't have you're not constantly hearing your name and turning maybe that's why i do all this probably do you like attention oh come on

uh but no but here's what i was thinking about when I was watching The Curse because you and Nathan Fielder actually you really do this I think creating and not releasing tension like that's a really important part of what you do it's an important part of what he does and reality TV I think part of the magic is you never get more tension than you can

handle you always get the exact right amount to break at the exact right moment to feel break at the exact right moment to feel good at the end yes so can you talk a little bit about that like you love reality tv which gives you bite the the perfect the perfect serving of tension and then you're like well what if i treated uh tension the way the the gluttony sin is treated in the movie seven you know basically create so much tension that then when you get kicked in the movie Seven. Basically, it creates so much tension that then when you get kicked in the stomach, you die.

Yes. At the beginning of the film. Wow. You know what I'm saying? I do get what you're saying. And I think what it is is there's something, there's a meditative quality to reality television that I really loved.

Specifically, HGTV, I became really obsessed with it. So I would see backsplashes, and it would get me very... You'd see them... It was very aspirational. It spoke to the inner idea of the American dream. And as you're going through it... But then what's also interesting is

you have a lot of shows where the people on them hate each other. And they're trying as hard as possible to pretend like they like each other, but you can only... They're not the best actors. You know, that's not their job. So you see that come through. So that was part of it was like, OK, what's the reality in that which isn't real?

But what is the reality in that? And then we took it and decided to make a fake reality show in a fake show that is as real as the fake people would want to make it. If that makes any sense but I guess no no it did hey you tell him it made sense so he's a guest here he was on the tonight show yesterday

so essentially I guess there's something also about that feeling of just like that. I don't know. It's weird because I'm not going out of my way to make tension, but I'm by nature an anxious person. And if you thank you, OCD, all that stuff. I think if you're hyper in that place, you can't help but be anxious because all you're thinking about is the 500,000

things that are around you in a specific time. And then if you go about to show that to somebody else, that will then transfer the anxiety onto the viewer. But to me, it's not anxious. So it's not like I'm going out of my way to do anything like that. And then when Nathan and I are together, we're both anxious people. So it's like times two coming at it from different directions so yeah you are both pretty anxious huh yeah but we have fun together see that's where it all started we were we just wanted to be friends you know or i i we met we mutually liked each other's stuff and then a friendship came and then the show came out of that but specifically with the, we like to take the pacing of it was very important. You know, there were episodes of Columbo that we would really watch.

He sent me one where Columbo kind of walks down a hallway and dials a phone number on a rotary phone, waits for the dial tone to ring and then answers. There's a lot of pacing things that you could do before that were like, oh, why can't you just do that now? And I think that's maybe what you're feeling is living in a moment for so long even though you know what's going to happen or you feel like you know what's going to happen we're not you don't know when that moment's going to end and that can feel like it's doing something to your brain yeah well no it is it does that's funny because it does have like um an old- pacing, just these long shots that hang for a really long time. And what I was thinking about when I saw you head to toe in silver, I thought this is a person thinking about how to break through. And but no, but like I mean it that that I feel like there's a lot of noise.

There's a lot of noise. There is. There's a lot of noise. And I was thinking about it because I don't know how – I don't know that Emma Stone and Nathan Fielder made that mock trailer that was a send-up of that other rom-com immediately and created a whole little cycle about it. And I think that your movies have sometimes been able to break through and have a much bigger impact than movies of that size normally would and what was striking to me in watching this show is i was like oh this is this is cutting through the noise and i don't mean it in a kind of commercial way i was like oh for me as a viewer i was like oh i there is so much prestige tv there's so much you know there are so many movie actors saying for the next three months i'm making a great one-part tv show it's like everywhere like there's a fucking fincher movie i'm like maybe i'll get to it a fincher movie a fincher movie fincher green on television

i just referenced it i haven't seen it why bother and it's almost like you're like i don't even know if i'm gonna find the time it It's crazy. It's crazy. Yes. But do you think about that? Like how to how to how to break through in this environment? Yes, that is that actually one of the kind of edicts that I would always say is this can't look or sound like anything on television because I, like you, had been so upset with almost everything that I was seeing because everything kind of looks the same. Everything looks good.

Everybody's acting really well. And it was just – but something was kind of bleeding into – everything was the same in a lot of ways. And I think it's less to do with the content and more about how it's kind of getting to you and the atmosphere at which you take it in. And I think a lot of it has to do with this feeling that you were talking about before. When you watch a reality show, you kind of sit back and let it just wash over you. And there's only so much activeness that that takes. And I guess a lot of these other shows almost kind of come out and do that or they're trying to do something and everything is so good. And everything is so good and everything is so perfect which one do you choose

you know right well it's a certain it is similar and but again like to this the right amount of tension delivered the right way beautifully shot like the standard for what we see just on a streaming show it's just like it's gotten much better it's just these are glossy beautiful shows but again that like meet out a certain experiment to that point we shot this hd at super high iso so it's what's iso what you it's it's basically if you're in low light situations you crank up the sensor to get the image into the camera but what that does is it creates a lot of digital noise. So by shooting at HD with this high ISO, the image looks crazy and it's aggressively digital and it's kind of, it's beautiful, but it's crummy at the same time. And that shouldn't be on your television set. There's no reason that should be on your television set.

So much so that it was so hard to get Showtime to agree to let it be on their television set because they're like, it's got to be 4K. And we're like, it is 4K. And they're like, well, how did you shoot it? And we're like, it doesn't matter. Speaking of things that are crummy and yet still good, I want to talk about your costuming for the show. Costuming in general or Dougie? No, Dougie, your character. Can you put up a photo of this guy?

So this is an audio show. I would describe Dougie's look as Chad Kroger from Nickelback meets Howard Stern. Is that fair? Was that also what you were going for? That's very fair, yes. There's also, there's a little bit of Johnny Depp in there. There's also, there's a little bit of Johnny Depp in there. There's also, there's just, there's something about,

what I will say is when I put those rings on, and it wasn't until like two weeks in that I stopped having to look at the picture that told you which ones went on which hand. And once I put them on though, it almost was like a medieval form of armor and i went out and i just became a different person i could walk out i could hey stop right there like you're you want to use your hands more when you have that stuff when you're using your phone you

got a thumb ring on there you're really just like sliding up you want everybody to see it and so there is this there's this performative quality to what he's wearing but it's also he's not the clothes aren't wearing him you know he is a part they're all one thing but what's important about it is when you see him like you just said you can immediately think of oh i know that guy i know exactly who it is i know what he's trying to do i know everything about him but then it becomes our turn to try and show something different, you know, showing inside to him that you may not have looked at or prejudged and said, oh, I'm just going to not think this guy's got an inner life because he's so

obsessed with his outer appearance that he doesn't have anything in there. But there is a deep sadness in there and he's covering up for it and he's trying his best to make himself happy. You know, there was a scene that we wanted to have in there where he's covering up for it and he's trying his best to make himself happy you know there was a scene that we wanted to have in there where he went shopping and as he was shopping all he wanted was the um approbation of the person selling him the clothes he wanted to know if it looked good he wanted to he wanted that from them because he wasn't getting it from anybody else because he's so lonely anyway so it's there's a lot that can go into it but i think it's just about trying to understand

people at the at the end of the day so in the first episode nate they nathan the the emma stone and nathan fielder characters they're basically trying to convince themselves and anyone that elicits that they're good people yes we're good people we're good people and we we see the dishonesty in that and then the character you're playing is just a kind of hardened reality show. He's just trying to get his shots. He doesn't give a fuck. He's putting tears.

The opening of the show is putting fake tears on the face of and menthol to make an old woman with cancer cry because it'll be a better shot. See, when you put it like that, it sounds like a bad thing. No, it and it's cool in the context of the show uh and and throughout it's like no no we're good people and there can be winners without losers yes and they're trying to make a reality show that tells that lie you just talk a little bit about like is that what your takeaway is from when you're watching hgtv that like yes i get that on reality shows couples couples are fighting, divorcing after whatever. Personally, like what interests me about it is the lie of the show

itself, regardless of the relationship between the two of them. Well, so then basically, as I was watching all of these shows, and you kind of you, they blend together at some point. And it wasn't until I saw the tagline for just HGTV in general that I thought oh okay and I was watching the show I was watching like it was one of these shows that doesn't even have a host it's just a narrator and it's just people going to different homes and they're like and then they went to this house which was like clearly they're not going to pick it it's some crazy house that looks like a troll lives in it or something and so they see that and they're like, oh, maybe we could put the kid's bed here. It's so, so dumb but fun and you're loving it.

But as, then it cuts to the commercial and it's all these like nice, fast animations about HGTV and it says, if you don't like your neighborhood, change it. And I was just like, whoa, rewind. And I was, I couldn't believe that it was actually advocating for what it was advocating for is it advocating for you moving to a different neighborhood or is it advocating for changing the neighborhood in which you live it's advocating for changing the neighborhood you can afford

and that's where I was like that's crazy because a lot of these places like when we were trying to find the place to to shoot there's a lot of these major cities with a place just outside of it where the person can't quite afford to live in the city that they want to live in. So they'll go to this other place that isn't necessarily the city they chose, but they're going to renovate the house and they're going to build the place up so that they can live there and feel like they're living in the other place. But what does that do to that city? What does it do to that town? And none of that is talked about ever. So it was just like, okay, you're sitting watching these shows and that's there.

It's all there for you to look at. So that was something that we wanted to kind of put into the show and look into as well, because is it possible to have a world where there's no losers? Like that's, and you see it when it's like, and even it's's like i'll take it to my son's chess like chess class like when he goes to play in a chess tournament and when he

would win the no um i guess the no score trophy where you just kind of get the trophy he even knows that he lost you know that he knows deep down they gave me this this trophy and it's meaningless to me you know yeah i got a trophy but i didn't win you know so yeah when i was in camp they had to really struggle to find things to put on the plaque for the little soft gay kids i remember i remember one boy like one boy got um most improved colon nature most improved okay colon nature wow he just liked to go play with the turtles. Oh, but it wasn't his nature. It was actual nature. like,

you would get plaudits for your successes in various sports. there's an, I don't know why this popped in my head. There's an amazing book

by, I think it's Ezra Jack Keats called Pet Show. Do you know this book? No. Anyway, it's, he's a great children's writer, but it's all about Pet Show.

And there's this one kid who wants to bring his cat. The cat runs away and he's got to come up with a pet. And this is an example where there are no losers. So this is maybe a nice thing to hear. Good news for once. So this poor kid doesn't have his cat, can't win. He can't go to the Pet Show because he doesn't have a pet. So he decides, quick thinking, he shows up with a jar.

And they say, well, what's your pet's name? And he says, like, Bob. And they said, okay, and what is it? He goes, he's a germ. And they look in the jar. It's an empty jar. And he says he's got a pet germ. And then they huddle together and they give him a prize for the world's quietest pet.

And he gets the prize. That's sweet. It was MRSA. It was MRSA. It was. But it was definitely, I hope it's not that because that one's got a high death rate. That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

So he didn't open the jar though. So that's good. He didn't open it. And then on top of that, the woman, there was an older woman who comes in at the same time and the cat happened to be standing next to her and she got the prize for the cat that he didn't get. Anyway, there's actually a lot you can learn from kids' books. time and the cat happened to be standing next to her and she got the prize for the cat that he didn't get anyway there's actually a lot you can learn from kids books you know and they're so short they are so short you wanted to be friends with nathan fielder that you watched that show

and you thought that's a person i want to have lunch with that is exactly what i thought that's cool what it was i i was i so i'd seen his show i loved the the show. And there was so many things that I was watching on it that I felt like a deep connection to. And it wasn't really until I saw there were all these ads that were for the blacklist. And he was like on the cover of these magazines. And they were everywhere. And for some reason, they bothered me. Not dissimilar to the thing you brought up earlier. It just bothered me.

I couldn't quite verbalize it. And then next thing I i know i saw an ad on the subway for nathan for you and he it was almost a one-to-one of this same ad and i was just like what are the chances that this guy also is bothered by this thing and so it was just like so just further cemented in my head that we would get along in some way. And then he had seen one of the movies and then we met and we kind of just got along. And when I was in L.A. the next time, you know what, I'll reach out to Nathan and see, like, have some dinner. And it was really just like two adults trying to become friends, which is very, it's weird. No, it's hard to do. It's hard to do.

It's hard to do. friends which is very it's weird you know it's hard to do it's hard to do because it's a very vulnerable place to be because putting yourself out there and like getting rejected for no reason because it's like you got friends you don't need any more but so right it's almost like the opposite like if you're if you get rejected during a date it's like oh they don't find me physically attractive and that can be painful yes but if you're getting rejected from a friendship that is horrific it sucks but if you're getting rejected from a friendship it's like no no that's this is about the core of yes this is that i didn't even think about i probably wouldn't have even asked if i had thought about that you're right if i'm like okay let's be

friends and they they take a good long look through you and they see everything and they're just like that's disgusting i don't want anything to do with that you're right that could give you a huge panic attack there's something also as i was i've watched the first episode and i'm excited to watch more but what i what i feel when i'm watching episode two you learn a lot more about dougie and can't wait to find out yeah this is about la people these are la types you know what i mean like just like or new york types too but like kind of like this is a show about people making a show but your people making a show who have met people who make shows

that you don't like. Yes. What do you mean? Shows that I don't like? No, no. There's something about the two of them. It's like, oh, I know these people. Okay, I see what you're saying. Yes, yes. And? No, it just seems funny. I don't like them either. Okay. So you're saying

you see that in the show yeah you're correct nice i guess the it's it's it's interesting because the meta quality didn't quite hit until i've seen it out in the world you know the fact that we all went down to this area shot on location the three of us are there making this show and then making another show within the show it's like there is a lot that you could unpack about it but it is truly fictionalized written and it was just we didn't want it to feel that way so that's why that's why we shot it this way and it's why all these things are done to kind of confuse you in a lot of ways to just feel it you know and then once you feel

it you can't shake it so well I think it's great everybody should watch The Curse thank you so much Benny thank you for having me this was so much fun when we come back we'll look back on a year of dykes thank you to Benny Zassi everybody thank you and we're back

I'm a gay man so I can call them this plus it's the name of their podcast please put your hands together for two dykes and a mic the hilarious

Mackenzie Goodwin and Rachel Scanlon come on up everybody hi welcome yeah oh do you have signs yeah wait

we do have signs do you want to switch no wait look it i like you this way are you sure yeah but are we gonna have my there we go oh there hi hi do you have do you normally sit in the opposite sides yes just when we podcast but now you're both facing this way all right this will work for me everyone's very excited you guys you were coming on the show really yeah so you're um you're, I'm saying it right, dykes? Yes. Yeah. It's usually a little less like a dart coming at you, but in general, it's more like kind

of cash. Dykes. Dykes. Yeah. Say it like not my dad. Oh my God, I'm sorry. My best friend is so mean But very attractive It evens out

You understand Soften the D Yeah Thanks Yeah That Did you feel it Did you feel the shift

Well I feel like I feel like before I was saying it A little bit like Like A part of a water system In the Netherlands Of course

Yes And that's not what it is. No. That this is not, you're not an infrastructure show. No, no, no, no, no. You're not. Partially.

But we do deal with a lot of wetness, I'd say. Yeah. Hey. Hey. We are a science-based podcast. Yeah. There's actually three tenets

of our podcast, if I may. Yeah, please. The first tenet. Science. Yeah. So we kind of get, we go out we grab we gather the data we come back we feed all the young dykes the data right number two it is the queerness of taylor swift taylor swift and number three i i want to say milfs yeah it's kind of the love of milfs are the three tenants that hold up two dykes and a mic. Right.

And that's so important. So let's talk about, it's a good time to talk about the queerness of time's person of the year. Right. Which I believe is the first time a person who is queer, according to the internet. According to the internet. Let's say allegedly yes i think it's it's an important milestone for people's imagination that makes a lot of sense like if in a lot of imaginations this is the first time there's been a queer time person of the year doesn't it feel like queer people on the internet manifested her sexual identity into a being yeah well that's the question is that what happened or did a lot of

people spend too long looking at their phones well that's kind of the same thing yeah one led to the other the other right wait where what is your what is the does does your podcast have an official position on taylor's sexual orientation my official position go ahead yeah where there's smoke there's a flaming gay person right yeah my position my position yeah on if taylor allison swift is queer or not yeah let. Let's get to it. Let's cut the fucking shit. Listen, I didn't know this was- Let's get to the hard stuff.

Gotcha. It's gotcha journalism. Moments earlier, I was told it is one of the core tenets of your show. Fair. But this feels like gotcha journalism. Yeah, I feel like- What's going on here? This is a topic you raised.

You know what? We walk off the set. topic you raise we walk off the set i know that when i listen to certain music i can feel a a closeted alto in me okay feeling awoken i'm hearing certain harmonies i'm hearing certain storylines about summertime and i know that i know that feeling so i will say this is what i'll say as my official stance okay i will say that her music is sapphic and that woman is seemingly straight here's my like how many gay people have to say boy that woman sounds gay right for you to be like maybe yeah i mean i don't know sometimes like sometimes i've been i've, I've been tricked by a few straight

people before. I've been tricked. Oh yeah. Yeah. Like, you know, when you're looking at somebody and they're making love with you and then they're straight. So like, there's no way to know. There's no way to know.

Yeah. Well, I mean, look, I, I think, I mean, Travis Kelsey exists. Yeah. Does he? Right. He's in the world. That's actually another tenet of our podcast. That he's fake.

That he doesn't exist. He's AI. That the Kansas City, I believe it's pronounced chefs, is... Right? That's why they... It's a barbecue thing. Yeah, they're cooking up a sport. They're cooking up touchdowns.

Yeah, they sure are. They sure are cooking up some hey hey come on into the kitchen because we're gonna watch the chefs score some touchdowns yeah yeah baby with travis and all of his buddies all the boys all the boys on the team the straight boys i mean here's the thing. Have you ever seen him live? Have you ever seen him in person? No, I've never seen him perform.

There you go. I've watched, I've seen him on YouTube. You know, it's like, it's like, I, you know,

it's like in the same way that like, you know, I've never saw, like I saw the traveling wicked. Yeah. Right. Of course. Honestly,

but I've watched a lot of different, um, Alphabets on the internet, but I've only like, that's how I'm, that's my relationship with Travis Kelsey. I've seen clips understood, but I've never seen him do his thing,

you know? And I, I know, understand my understanding of football is that it is about a live experience, right? I have no idea. All I know.

I like those. I like those little butts. Yeah. They got good butts. You see, they're very butts. They're juicy. They're very strong. They're strong butts. They're feminine, strong butts.

Strong, strong butts. And in tights. What's not to like? What's not to like? That's what Taylor's saying. Listen, bi women exist, and I do believe she's dating Travis Kelsey. You believe? Yes, obviously.

Now, that's something we've seen and touched in real life, for sure. A bi woman yeah yeah that's gotta be real no i believe i believe listen i want you that's a core tenant of this podcast bi women exist yeah um so wait okay do you want to do um do you want to do the segment yeah okay thank you both for joining me for a very special installment of Gay News. Tonight, we'll be taking a look back at 2023 at some very special moments in Lesbo history. What we're calling...

Are you saying Lesbo? Wow. First of all, just to be clear, a Lesbo wrote this. Okay, thank God. Did a dyke write this? I don't know who typed it specifically, but a Lesbo was definitely in the Google Doc.

Okay, great. A Lesbo was definitely in the Google Doc. Okay, great. A lesbo was deaf in the Google Doc. Listen, lesbos stay in the Google Docs. It's time for, as I said, we're talking about lesbo history. In this segment, we're calling a big old dyke year in review. Taylor Swift.

Uh-oh. Is that Megan Rapinoe? As a baby. As a baby. As the New Year's baby. What's a New Year's baby? That's a New Year's. You know the New Year's baby?

No. That the year is represented. That the year. Have you heard of a baby? I sure have. We know what it is. This feels like we're infantilizing Dykes again. Wow. Wow.

So famously, there's a baby. And actually, when you're trying to explain it, it sounds stupid. But the concept of a year is represented that there's a baby and an old man. No, I don't like this. And the baby represents, ooh, it's a baby and an old man. No, I don't like this. And the baby represents, ooh, it's a new year. And the old man says goodbye to the old year. The year dies. He dies at the end of the year.

Right? From what? Well, what do you think happens to the New Year's baby? No, the baby doesn't die, right? No, the baby becomes the old man. The baby lives for one year. This is fucked. If I'm being honest, this is fucked.

I didn't make the graphic. I don't like it. Wait, I'm so, and I won't hyper fixate on this for too much longer. Where did you see, like where have I missed this? Is it something you see on your phone or on TV? Is it like the Macy's Day Parade? I think it's like an intrinsic part of culture that exists.

And it just blew right over the two dykes? Yeah, it just blew. Yes. Okay. Yep. It was a 70s cartoon. It was a 70s cartoon, although I think it precedes that. I think it's very old.

Brian, Google it. It's certainly not ancient. The cavemen used to. I think it's cool. I don't think think i think that like you said i won't hyper fixate on this but i think that you couldn't unless you it doesn't become hyper fixation until you've done it for some time you know what i'm saying you fixate on it and then once it feels like it's time to move on and you won't that's when the hyper kicks in don't you think i don't think you know what it has felt like in here that's and that's so important oh so here's what happens we read these news things

and then after the story is done we say we normally would say but up up up up up up gay news but we'll say instead da da da da da da da da dyke news fantastic is that okay oh i love that so we got to kick it off da da da da dada-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da- with Joe Alwyn they had a theater waif with Matt Healy they could hold on to his gay little haircut for hope Travis Kelsey is straighter than a Super Bowl Doritos commercial starring Kevin Hart listen no one

should even comment on Taylor Swift unless you want to be torn apart by hundreds of desperate touch starved queer women

and I didn't write this you did go you did very good though thank you so much. And that being said, I thought Reputation was overrated. That's literally messed up.

And I want to say, backstage, Rachel and I were like, we cannot say this. We can't say that. The Dykes will rip us apart. I know. Reputation is the best. It's the gayest one. It's the sexiest one.

It's very erotic. Best part of the concert, too. Yeah. You win. You bet. That's your favorite era? No. I'm in Exile.

I love Exile. Yeah. I love Exile. Exile, when I listen to Exile for, that was a song like, I mean, hundreds of times. Just like repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat. And then I was better. Yes. Yeah.

To accept healing the queer community. I transitioned from Exile to House in Nebraska by Ethel Kane, which was moving in a sadder but queer direction. Incredible. If that makes sense to anybody listening, and it may not. I think those are one and the same.

You think? Sadder and queer go together. Yeah, no, no. It definitely was with the grain for sure. Was Taylor Swift kind of like your gateway to sadder and queer music? You were like, this isn't enough? Yeah, no. It was like, okay, I've tried that, but now I need the harder stuff.

Yeah, I love that. Yeah, no, yeah, that's right. According to Vanity Fair, they call each other by their nicknames Tay and the Yeti. Taylor Swift explains that it's all in good fun. And even if I don't understand why he calls me the Yeti. Tay and the Yeti sounds like a shitty Echo Park wine bar where a hot pretzel costs $18. But whatever gets straight people off, you know? Yes.

I mean, this has been getting them off. This has been. Like for a long time. I have to tell you something when Taylor Swift started showing up with Travis Kelsey the the Gaylord denialists

yes the Hetlers a term I love yes they became so fucking smug the Hetlers have been on a high. This is by erasure though. Yes, it is by erasure.

The whole thing is by erasure. But you know what's not by erasure? Taylor Swift in the Times Person of the Year magazine shoot dressed like fucking Tar. Yeah. No, we know. Have you seen it?

I didn't see it. Did she look like Lydia Tar? I mean, a spitting image. Wow. It's going to blow your mind. I can't wait. It's going to be great. Holy moly.

Gay news. Gay news. Dyke news. Sorry. Okay. Subaru unveiled a flying car called the Air Mobility Concept at October's Japan Mobility Show. Let's look at this car. Wow. Ooh. Okay. It's a Show. Let's look at this car. Wow.

Ooh. Okay. It's a bird. It's a plane. No, it's Jen, the 36-year-old accounts manager with a national parks pass and a complicated relationship

with her mother. If you haven't seen it, this thing slaps. It looks like a prop from Dune 2. What are you lesbians doing right now? Bachelorette star Gabby Windy came out as queer in August, hard-launching a relationship with writer

Robbie Hoffman in an Instagram post reading, told you I'm a girl's girl. Turns out her final rose was more of the Georgia O'Keeffe variety. That rocks. That was good. The Bachelorette. Gay news. Are we want to do dyke news? I thought we were doing dyke news. That rocks. That was good. The Bachelorette. Oops. Da-da-da-da-'t gay to begin with, she will be after talking to 35 men. That's so true.

That's good. That's good. Booksmart star Beanie Feldstein married producer Bonnie Chance Robertson May in a summer camp-themed wedding. As of yet, no Beanie babies. Yuck. Iconic.

We loved it. The band Boy Genius, composed of Julian Baker Phoebe Bridgers And Lucy Dacus Earned six Grammy nominations For their debut LP The Record

The only thing left to do is date Love it or leave it Head writer Hallie Kiefer Said the band In a legally binding contract Wow you can't make this stuff up Hey if you use contact clues You might be able to figure out

Who the lesbo in the Google Doc is. Got her. Ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga-ga who filed for divorce from her wife and fellow soccer pro, Allie Krieger. Some would say that the World Cup runneth over. Nice. Here, I want you to do this one. Can you read mine? I decided I can't do it. Oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah. When asked about it, Harris simply said, what can I say? I love Bush. Nice. You did that so much better than I was going to do it. Speaking of soccer, two-time World Cup winner Megan Rapinoe retired this year, playing her final game in November. That's so funny.

I was just saying that I wanted Megan Rapinoe to step on me in a pair of cleats. And here it turns out she was actually a soccer player this whole time. Gay news, news, news, news. It's been so nice meeting the two of you. Same. Thank you so much. Thank you for having us. I feel like we really connected. Yeah, I think so.

Do you think so? Yes. Let's go see the Eros tour now. Oh, I don't need to see it again. It wasn't long enough and so many people. I would see it again. Let's go. Let's go.

Yeah. Well, should we go now? Yeah. How many times did you go? No, we just saw the movie together. saw the movie wow that was enough i needed bathroom breaks i need snacks fuel chips were there any other um uh sapphic news stories that i missed of great importance to you personally of great importance to us personally i mean you got married i got married she got engaged you got engaged got engaged. You got engaged? Yeah. You did. Wow. Yeah.

That's cool. Thank you. Like last week, still kind of sunbathing. Last week? Mm-hmm. Wow. Yeah.

A lot of things happened this year. I think it was a good year for the gays. It felt like it was a dyke year. Huge win. Yeah. Huge win for the gays. Yeah. There's our baby.

And there's Megan Rapinoe as a baby. Cute. Thank you so much to Rachel and Mackenzie go listen to Two Dykes and a Mike when we come back

Ryan Grimm is here woo that was great thank you guys and we're back reporter and author of the new book The Squad

AOC and the Hope of a Political Revolution Ryan Grimm. Welcome to the show. Enjoy. Thank you. This is good.

This is good. The one we have in the office is just a printout. I know. Now there's a real physical book. Look at that. This book, since it's been released, has gone through a news cycle like The Squad. Yes. Which is interesting and I think a good place to start so conservative

outlets got a hand got their hands on the book and started taking parts of it out of context to blow up fights between democrats disagreements between aoc and nancy pelosi uh uh misrepresents disagreements or discussions between people like pramila Jayapal and the squad. Can you talk a little bit about just what happened? Yeah, it's been surreal to watch it unfold because I covered this period. And by this period, I mean, say like 2018 and 2019, when the squad is first coming into office and becoming this phenomenon. They all had, and AOC in particular, had a higher name identification with Republicans for the first like year and a half of their term time in office

than they did with Democrats because of the 24-7 right-wing ecosystem just blasting them, just calling them every single name in the book. And people would, eventually some of it would break through, but because the ecosystems are divided we wouldn't see unless you're following me you wouldn't see a lot of this stuff they're saying unless trump jumps in and makes it a national story by saying uh send them back or you know send you know if they don't like it here they can go back and fix their own countries which is you know they're all american citizens it's just idiotic stuff uh from from donald trump And so I had watched that, and I had watched the way that it's absorbed

and mediated through Congress and how they experienced that. But then you're exactly right. About a week before the book came out, it starts popping up in, like, the Daily Mail and Fox News and New York Post, and they would take, it was, and I could really understand from their

perspective what it was like so just for one example uh there's one guy that's quoted talking about the rollout of the green new deal saying that it was a this one particular part was a cluster is the part where there was a a fact sheet that hadn't i think been vetted carefully enough and it made reference to cows and methane republic Republicans then took that and said AOC wants to get rid of hamburgers. Right. Yeah, yeah. And so that part, everybody already agrees. Like nobody would actually disagree that that particular little part was a cluster.

Right. So what they do is they take that, they put it in my voice rather than somebody else, and then say that I said that the entire Green New Deal is a cluster and a disaster. Never said anything like that. It's just, and just on and on throughout this coverage. And then each article would then kind of use the false stuff in the last article and then make it even more false. Like a game of telephone, except it didn't start with something true.

And then by the end of it, it was just so wildly distorted. It was amazing. So there's been this debate has happened many times where the question is, when Democratic moderates in swing districts who have legitimate political challenges, and who view their success as candidates, resting on their ability to persuade moderates and independents in their districts, which is a real phenomenon that is a serious challenge for them. At times, there would be an intrademocratic debate that says the squad, the left of the party is making my job impossible, that I'm being painted by their brush. Those are the players. But then you step back and you see the game and that there is this big media apparatus that exists to elevate not just the left, but the kind of missteps, worst examples, worst messages of the left. And I'm just wondering how you think about that, because we are a big party that has to have space for AOC and the squad, but also people in Michigan and

Ohio and swing suburban districts that need to win as well. That and the squad, but also people in Michigan and Ohio and swing suburban districts that need to win as well. That is a very real problem. And I think what Democrats can most effectively do about it is not attack each other over it. So, so often, you will have, say, Fox News, pick up something, distort it, flip it, and then fire it back at Democrats. And then you get this entire cycle of Democrats getting asked, do you condemn this thing? And you're seeing a bunch of like House resolutions on the floor now, like, do you condemn this? Do you condemn that? You know, how often have you condemned it? How specifically have you condemned it? And this, there was a recent resolution where you had something like 90 Democrats just vote present on it. And I thought that was actually an interesting and smart step forward where it's like, you know what, the center left, should read this book, should listen directly to the left so that when they start hearing this stuff, they'll be like, oh, that actually doesn't sound right.

You know, let me not amplify that. And then anybody in the party who is amplifying that stuff should be disciplined if they're doing it in a bad faith, dishonest way. One other thing that I think at times is sort of hard to square is AOC as a political figure clearly, I think, has kind of two big strengths. One is the strengths of her worldview, an ideological worldview that clearly has a lot of purchase, especially with a lot of engaged young people who are upset, angry, disappointed, frustrated, hopeless, and looking for someone who carries that torch. And on the other is the fact that she is incredibly charismatic and smart and capable and persuasive messenger. As you sort of worked on this book,

as you talk to people, did you have any insights about the way those things work together? I mean, one thing that's happened in recent weeks is you've seen a lot of people be pretty fucking surprised when John Fetterman say, who they really like,

because he was like, he was pugnacious and had a lefty spirit and energy right right suddenly takes a kind of i think more centrist view on israel and more pro-israel point of view but how much did you think about personality driven politics versus ideologically driven politics so i i think i think it's both and i'll tell you like one one story that i reported through the book that i'm curious for your take on this because i bet you will will have encountered some of this yourself. So you have to imagine, you know, she comes in, you know, cold to politics. Like she was reading about politics. She's smart. She's went to Boston

University. So she's like an engaged person. You know, she was a volunteer for the Bernie Sanders campaign, but she's never served in office. She hasn't been worked on professionally on a campaign. So all of this is new to her, which wasn't the case for the squad. They'd all served in lower offices, the rest of the squad. And so very early spring of 2019, the budget is coming around,

the appropriations budget. So she tells her staff, look through here and tell us where we can add amendments. Like we're in Congress, that's what we do. Like we're going to amend this thing. And the staff comes back to her and they're like, hey, so Democrats control the House. Every presidential candidate, as opposed to the Hyde Amendment, the Hyde Amendment is longtime federal law that says you can't use federal money for abortions.

Every national Democrat is against this we control the house biden was getting hammered at this exact time for his long time support of the hyde amendment he would soon flip and before so she's like this is a layup this is a mistake like we can let's put an amendment that gets that takes the hyde amendment out like that's what our values are that's it's in our platform. This is easy. The staff's like, okay, great. They call the subcommittee. They're like, this is what we're going to offer.

And they're like, yeah, about that. She gets a call from Rosa DeLauro, a member of Congress, one of the most outspoken, you know, pro-choice members in the House, who kind of tells her, like, look, Republicans aren't going to let this pass. And if we put it on the floor,

it's going to put a lot of moderate Democrats in a difficult position. And they'll just be like, okay, well, thank you for this. And so then they call Planned Parenthood and they call NARAL, the major pro-choice organizations in Washington. They're like, we'd like to fight for this. We believe that we should stand up with our chest

and say that we support abortion rights fully. they're like yeah about that so we don't we don't actually want you to push a vote on this they're like well why they're like well it would put democrats who are in swing districts in a difficult spot because it's you know some polling in some districts shows that people are pro-choice but they don't want taxpayer money going towards abortion. But you guys are Planned Parenthood and you guys are. Yeah, we support it and it's in our mission to support it. But we need Democrats to be in power in order to then eventually enact those laws. And so they invite her to come meet with a group of reproductive justice

groups. That meeting never happens. So she's still, she's still like, this doesn't make sense. Like we support this. Like, let's,

let's at least have a vote on it. And so then she talks to Ayanna Pressley, a member of the squad who had, I was chairing a caucus for pro-choice rights. She's like, I'm going to handle this. And I know i'm doing an amendment the way she ended up writing the amendment they learned later it was kind of

deliberately written in a way that it would not pass the rules committee so it would it would get a debate kind of in the rules committee but then it would not make it to the floor so they don't have to uh it's so that nobody gets put in this difficult position. And so as she's like seeing how things are done here, she's absorbing, she's getting it. She's like, okay, you know, I actually, I understand the point that's being made here. But from her perspective also, at some point you have to actually fight for something.

And so the book is kind of about when you choose those moments to fight and when you say, okay, you know what? We're not going to win this right now, so we live to fight another day. And I think more often she wants to pick the fight. But, you know, so far, I think what you've seen with her is somebody who is now kind of much more accepted by the rest of the party, because I think she has kind of accepted some of these tactical lessons. And so and there was a there's a poll that I sort of end the book with where New Hampshire voters were asked who the who their favorite Democrat was and what what shocked her and shocked me when it came out, it was her. Like, you would not have expected, like, five years ago,

this kind of controversial figure who is being used to kind of divide other Democrats would now be in a position with having the highest approval rating of any Democrat in the kind of first primary state. And also someone that has now faced some criticism from the left for, for.

Right. Probably not unrelated. Right. Not unrelated, but like sort of, Oh, you know, what did we ever get for AOC?

She's now just a normie Dem. She's, she's all these things. It's, it's fascinating to watch it unfold because I do think it's a challenge to understand like, when is the role of the left to accept what's possible? And when is the role of the left to accept what's possible? And when is the role of the left to change what's possible?

Yeah, to question it. Look, you guys are wrong. We actually can do more. Right. Right. And I think a left that always says we shouldn't accept our current realities is a left that will be pushed aside. Right. But a left that goes along and doesn't pick the fights when necessary is a left

that isn't doing its job. And I don't think anyone has a good, there's no good answer. There's no magic formula for how to do this. Yeah. And this is a book kind of about, you know, how they all have tried to find that balance on their own. Yeah. And it is, it is amazing that all of like, so much of this has fallen on the shoulders of someone who was new to politics, who who is success is born not just of kind of representing this view, but doing it so well. I mean, I've I've gone to interview AOC a couple of times and she is, I think, one of the great messengers in the Democratic Party in politics who has an ability to kind of tell a story and do so carefully. Sometimes I think more carefully than other figures on the left. And I think sometimes that blowback is kind of almost like not a resentment of AOC, but the resentment of reality. Right. Yeah, yeah. I can see that.

Yeah. For sure. Yeah. There's another quick moment in there where there's this – do you remember the TurboTax blow up? I do. So just as this is coming up, she reads this article and tries to find other people that will do something about this. So just so people understand this. Basically, taxes are stupid, and the way we file them are incredibly stupid. And these services like TurboTax and all these other kind of businesses thrive on a system that doesn't need to exist, that a lot of what we do when we file taxes could happen automatically, but it isn't allowed to happen because if it did, this business would be eliminated. Yeah. And so there's a bill that is then going through the house, democratic controlled house that would make it illegal for the IRS to make its own free turbo

tax system. And after the pro public article comes out, nobody's willing to stand up against it. And she and her aid are like walking down to the, to the house floor. They're going to, they're going to object to it. They're going to work, work to get it out. She goes into the cloakroom. John Lewis is the sponsor, the lead sponsor of this bill. And so She goes into the cloakroom. John Lewis is the sponsor, the lead sponsor of this bill. And so she goes into the cloakroom. And you've met John Lewis. I have, yeah. I'm sure.

It just oozes charisma and moral gravitas. And you've got John Lewis telling you, the pro public is not right about this. They're not reading that right. And also there's all, and maybe even if they are, there's all these other good things in the bill that are so much better.

And so even if they're right, it's worth doing this. And so she's like, she comes out of the cloakroom and she's talking to her aide. She's like, John Lewis is making some really good arguments. And it's hard. And the aide told me, he's like, what could's talking to her age she's like john lewis is making some really good arguments and it's it's it's hard and the aide told me he's like i could what could i say to her like i'm not gonna go tell john lewis that he's a sellout like you you go tell john lewis

that he's a sellout and so she's like what do i do he's like he's like you cannot vote for it like you'll you'll get killed he's like you should go in and ask for a recorded vote um and then vote against it it's gonna pass everybody loves it uh she's like all right i'll i'll see what i'm gonna do and she goes onto the house floor and she gives a one minute speech you know where she praises john lewis for all the work that he did on it she then adds this is a really bad provision and we should strip this one out and then then, like, the moment of truth comes, the speaker gowls, like, all in favor, aye. Everybody's aye.

All in favor, no. And that's when usually somebody says, I request a recorded vote. But if nobody says that... The ayes carry it. The ayes carry it. And she and Katie Hill were the only ones who had raised any objections. She couldn't...

None of the other squad wanted to do it either. No objections. Ayes carry it. Because in that moment, any objections she couldn't no none of the other squad want to do it either no objections eyes carry it because in that moment she she couldn't kind of put her she didn't want to be the one who was going to put all of her colleagues on record but at the same time people are like yeah but that's what you're there for and then and then and then the outrage you know grew even further and the senate was like okay we're not this, because there was so much outrage. People were like, really? You're going to pass a law that says we can't file our taxes for free?

Like, we already have to pay you the taxes. Now we have to pay to pay the taxes? Yeah, Uncle Sam. But as her aide was saying, it's easy to judge, but also you try it. Like it's really, it's difficult stuff. And I do, there's something very, it's very poignant and sad to be at this point where some of this has been so demoralizing for someone like AOC, someone who takes this chance to become a member of Congress and kind of runs headlong into the realities of this job,

kind of runs headlong into the realities of this job, a job that was ugly and difficult even when there wasn't a kind of recalcitrant and fascistic right-wing movement in this country. This is a moment where I think a lot of the left feels demoralized regardless of, I think that you see a debate over, especially people that are very engaged about how much credit do you give someone like Joe Biden for efforts on student loans, even though you can't hold him responsible for the court, for the biggest investment in climate and history, for playing his hand as well as he could. alienated a lot of people on the left who are critical of the Biden administration's failure

to call for a ceasefire, a permanent ceasefire. What do you, as someone watching how this sort of relationship between the center left and the left, there was this piece by Robert Kagan everybody's been talking about, that we're on the cusp of a dictatorship from Trump and one of the points he makes, among a lot of worst case scenario points, is the left is fractured. That is what happens in a country

that is vulnerable to this. What do you see in your reporting as a path to reminding or cajoling or convincing or making changes that make possible the left to come together. And I think one thing that you see is a kind of loud element on social media that gets overplayed. I think broadly speaking, despite some of that noise that you were hearing, up until October and this catastrophe in the Middle East, you actually were seeing the center left and the left pretty well aligned. You had this remarkable moment during the fight over

Build Back Better and the inflation reduction act, Biden's gigantic social spending and climate package, where it was the people in the swing districts that were teaming up with the Progressive Caucus saying, we need this. Like, we need something to run on. You've got to pass this child care stuff, pass this affordable care stuff. We need these subsidies so we can pass the climate stuff so we can tell people what we've done so we can get reelected. You remember that was the opposite back in 2009, 2010. Any moderates who voted for the Affordable Care Act or voted for the climate bill did so believing that they had hurt themselves. And probably correctly. Several believed they voted, passed the Affordable Care Act, and lost their seats.

Lost their seats as a result. But they did it anyway. know they're because that's they're like that's why i'm in office i'm willing to do it uh that was not the case this time their political incentives and their kind of ethical values lined up they're like we need so you got to a place where the left and the center left were rowing like in the same direction against just a handful of marginalized Democrats. Kyrsten Sinema was not even a Democrat anymore. Joe Manchin, who's going to who's going to be gone, might run as a third party candidate. And then Josh Gottheimer and his what he called them the unbreakable nine that we're going to kind of stop Biden's agenda. So so you're back back in 2009, 2010. It was scores of these types that you had to deal with.

And now you're talking about just a handful, fewer than a dozen of these recalcitrants. So the party's coming together in a more progressive direction. But what this catastrophe in Gaza does to that, we don't know. Because we could just be even as horrific as it's been. We might be even just at the beginning of what we're going to see. Well, that's a terrible

fucking place to leave it. Any sort of surprising moments in reporting this book with AOC, with the squad, about what it is like for them to be in Congress that are of a slightly happier tenor than now. There was one cool moment where it all worked together for everybody, the far-angry left, the squad,

the progressive caucus. The far-angry left. And the center left. Please, please, call me Mr. Angry Left, if it doesn't make sense. The Far Angry Left was my father. Mr. Far Angry Left. During the American Rescue Plan,

that was his first one, this $1.9 trillion package that he pushed that had the direct checks, the unemployment stuff. They tried to put a $15 minimum wage in. The parliamentarian, it's a whole story we don't need to get into, says you can't do this. Bernie puts it up for a vote.

They don't have the 60 they need. And so the far angry left is just incredibly, absolutely angry. And so now you have Manchin saying he also wants to trim back the checks. He thinks the unemployment stuff is too generous. You're seeing so much fury. I was far and angry then. Yes, exactly. We all were.

And the squad is very publicly pushing back. Like, this is outrageous. You already took out the minimum wage. Now you're going to try to take out this while we're in the middle of this? And so Jayapal and Schumer had developed a relationship over the last couple years. And so Jayapal told Schumer,

look, if Manchin does this, like they're walking. And the threat had real credibility to it. She's like, you know, don't blame me, but they are out of here. You see how much pressure they're under. So Manchin came to him and to make these demands, these cuts, these cuts, these cuts.

And Schumer was able to tell him, Joe, like, I can't do that. If I do that, Pramila tells me I lose the squat. And so then Manchin, for the first time, a centrist Democrat had been put in a position of actually facing a credible threat from the left because usually the left you know remember 60 democrats in 2009 said if there's no public option we're not signing off on obamacare they all they all voted for obamacare because it's like it's still a good bill it's still going to save some lives so most like progressives are going to go along with it but there was so much anger so much organizing that it was credible and Manchin caved. He's like, I'd rather have the bill than get these cuts. That doesn't happen much, but it shows that there's like an actual path where you can use the anger of the left in a productive way and get something

that was extremely popular. Biden's popularity up through his first six months uh was you know he's never seen uh approval numbers like that again well he brought us back down a little sorry but that was good but that was good yeah that was good uh everybody uh thank you ryan so much thank you uh ryan grim the book is the squad aoc and the hope of a political revolution Everybody check it out. When we come back, sibling rivalry. Don't go anywhere. This is Love It or Leave It, and there's more on the way.

And we're back. She's at the top of Love It or Leave It's comedians to watch list because we're all about to watch her right now. Hey. Please say hello to the very hilarious Zeynep Johnson. Hey. All right. Hi.

You have 12 siblings? Yeah, I have 12 siblings. Yeah, I know, right? I'm getting so much glory for the work that my mom did. Yeah. People are always like, wow. I'm taking, I'm getting so much glory for the work that my mom did. Yeah. People are always like, wow. I'm like, it was her vagina. You guys clammed up at vagina?

I didn't. How many of them do you genuinely like? I genuinely like them all. One of them can't come in my house. I like some more than others. There's like four that like I, they're like, if they weren't my siblings, I would still seek them out for friendship. But then there's like three that I'm like, you lucky you my sibling. You love but don't like them.

I mean, I like them, but I would not. I like them in a forced environment. Right. Sure. would not i like them in a forced environment right sure you know like i recognize qualities that they have that are good and i like that about them but they don't quite gel with my personality at the highest level you know no i understand that i understand that i have a lot i have that with people oh i thought you were gonna say you have that with your siblings no no no do you have siblings i have have a sister. Oh, a sister. Well, all right. Hey, how many of them are gay, the 12?

We don't know, but I mean, we speculate. Like, statistically, we have the numbers, right? Right, for sure. But the odds of it being zero is small, I think. Well, right now, if there is someone, they're in their closet. If there is, you know. Sometimes I look in a mirror and say, is it you? Oh, you think you're gay? I mean, it'd be a fun choice. Oh, you think it's a choice.

End the show. Bring in the glad soldiers. I know. I know. Come get me. Throw me away. Now, let's say all of a sudden, you know, a door from the future opened.

Yeah. And someone said, you need to tell me right now which of your siblings is gay or the universe will collapse. I'm sorry. I'm not good at coming up with things on the fly. But would you have a guess?

Yeah, gun to my head. Gun to your head. I didn't want to do a violent version, so I tried to come up with a non-violent version, but then you were right. Gun to your head. Gun to my head. Gun to your head.

Which of your siblings is fucking gay? Yeah, because if it's somebody from the future and they're like, which one is gay? I'm going to be like, wait, you're from the future? You know, we'd get sidetracked. No, I did a bad job. Yeah. I'm sorry.

No, why? Don't apologize. I would say, and this is totally, this is totally the stereotypical answer, but there's so much evidence to back it up. But like, so, you know, hey. She's so mad at me.

You were watching the Republican debate. What's up? All right. There we go. Thanks, Ben. I would say that it's my criminal brother. Oh. Yeah.

Is that... When did he earn the moniker criminal? Very, very early. Let's see. I think it was the summer of 99. No, I don't... He's been in and out of jail for uh most of our lives he's four years older than me um and so yeah i think when i was younger i

thought it was like cool you know like i'd be like look at him go you know maybe it's good maybe that's is yours that you think that maybe he's running from being gay like he's sort of that that's part of the maybe that's part of what's drawn him. Being gay is sort of like a crime against heterosexuality in a sense. You know what I mean? Well, I hear what you're saying. I don't think it's a crime against it. But here's the thing.

That is the romantic comedy we haven't seen. You know what I'm saying? You just love someone so much that you go back to jail. Yeah. I mean, yeah. Somebody somebody pitch it that's cool they just keep doing crimes to get back into jail together yeah and it's like fun stuff you know fun stuff yeah it's a fun movie because that's the thing about my brother he's not like a he's not like a violent criminal he's like a like a wacky silly criminal like You sure you want to do time for this?

You know? You know the Hamburglar? I do. From McDonald's? Maybe he's gay. You think the Hamburglar's gay? He's so flamboyant. Yeah, he could be.

Yeah, I think Mary McCheese is gay. I think every McDonald character is gay. Yeah, I think Grimace is gay. Yeah. Are these all McDonald characters? Yeah. Okay, okay, okay. Maybe Ace.

Ace. I don't know that one. I think Grimace could be asexual. Oh, asex Yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. Maybe Ace. Ace. I don't know that one. I think Grimace could be asexual. Oh, asexual. Okay. Okay. Okay. I thought you meant there was a McDonald character named Ace.

I was going to say, well, I haven't been there in forever. Okay. All right. So because you have so many siblings. Yeah. How many, what's the gender breakdown? Seven boys, six girls. For a very long time.

Not a very long time, but for like, I don't know, three years it was six and six and we thought like, ooh look, we're so cool and then my younger brother came. Fucking asshole. It's time for a game we're calling Step by Step, This Full House is Cheaper by the Dozen Plus Eight. Here's how it works.

We're gonna put up some famous siblings. Nice. We're gonna put up some famous siblings and we will decide definitively which one should live no i'm just kidding we'll decide which one is our favorite all right the first the trumps it's uh eric let's leave poor baron out of this we're just deciding between eric john jr tiffany and ivanka which is the best trump sibling you know i honestly didn't even know there were that many um i would probably say trump donald that's a weird name i don't it's like a regular name but also like a weird name it is a strange donald i know it is weird don yeah it felt right when it was just like a duck because it feels cartoon it does feel right for a duck

but not like just you just say it like yeah don i don't know sorry donald's out there um he loves ivanka right he does he loves her too much yeah she had shoes though she she did like blooming deals i know for a time yeah for a time and she gave it up I think they gave her up oh did they because it was like we can't have her shoes in here they were like in the middle

like not a kitten heel but not a stiletto that's weird oh yeah I didn't I didn't know about that which one I think Tiffany

is my personal choice because she's the most outside of the whole thing yeah and you know that like couple glasses of wine she most outside of the whole thing. Yeah. And you know that like a couple glasses of wine. She's funny about the whole thing.

You know what I mean? Which one is Tiffany? She's the one all the way on the right. She's the one. With the blue dress? And she sang songs. And her songs are available on Spotify. And it's a treat. Because, you know, they don't work.

Yeah. Yeah, she does look like she could be a member of the band Danity Kane. Well, you know, Don, because Don Jr. dated one of the Danity Kane people. Did he? Right? Am I remembering that correctly? Anybody? Wait, these are all Trump's kids?

No, no, no. I was like, I had no idea. Well, Jared Kushner's up there. I don't know who the two Libby ones are. Maybe they're children of one of the children. It's like I just see white people I had no idea. Well, Jared Kushner's up there. I don't know who the two little ones are. Maybe they're children of one of the children. It's like I just see white people I don't know. This is in front of flags. The correct answer is Tiffany.

Next up, the Kulkins. We have Macaulay, Kieran, Rory. Are there any others? That's it. Oh, and then there's also Dakota, also Dakota Quinn, Shane, Christian and Jennifer there's a lot of fucking Culkins I think we just have to choose the best between Macaulay, Kieran and Rory is Rory the one

with the long hair ooh very kind of severe but interesting yeah I'm gonna choose I'm gonna choose okay okay I'm going to choose. Okay. Okay. No, no, no.

No, no, no. I was going to choose Rory because he seems like the coolest now, but I'm going to go back, throwback Macaulay Culkin. The one who started it all. Yeah. Let's just do it. Yeah. Macaulay. Come on.

Home Alone. Ah! Like, let's just do it. Let's just give credit where it's due. When I was a kid, my father got a Laserdisc player. Yeah. And we had one Laserdisc. Yeah.

And it was Home Alone. Really? Laserdisc. It was a giant CD. It was like a CD comically big. Yes. And you had to flip it to watch the second half of Home Alone. That is so funny.

But you know what? What? Home Alone is a fantastic movie. Yeah. know what what home alone is a fantastic movie yeah and even as an adult if i'm you know in a middle city like middle of america say i'm in a hotel room and it comes on i'll have a hard time leaving a hotel room no i love the film i do think that it's a lot of trouble to avoid paying a deductible on home insurance you know because you know they had a good umbrella policy they're very serious people they had a lot of plans around the vacation, lights on, lights off.

They were very on top of their shit. Yeah. But Home Alone took place in Chicago, right? That makes a lot of sense. You think? Yeah.

Yeah, I do too. Just the coldness. Next up, the Williams sisters. Oh. Ooh. I think it's hard to decide. Yeah. when i was a kid okay and the and venus first came on the scene and i remember the craziest thing i've ever heard a person say on television which is venus williams was destroying just winning winning

and the dad gave an interview and he said her sister's better. And everyone was like, what the fuck? What do you mean the sister's better? And then Serena came. Isn't that cool? What a confident dad. Yeah, that's such a different telling than they did in the movie. It's like Serena was trying to play and he's like, sit down, it's Venus' turn.

In a movie, yeah. But here's, I'm gonna go with Venus. I love them both, but I'm gonna go with Venus I love them both but I'm gonna go with Venus and this is for completely selfish reasons when I post stand-up videos or anything uh like any any like anything about me succeeding she comments and like what yes I believe she follows me Venus Williams is a is in your is in your fucking yeah like like she, she's like, if I'm like, you know, comedy special, she's like, can't wait. If I post like some, she's like, you deserve it. Like, she's like, this is great.

I love, like she's so. Tennis anyone? Right. That's cool. I know. Wow. Venus Williams. I know.

Even the name like Venus Williams, know Even the name Like Venus Williams It's like It's like On another plane Yeah it's like That person from the future That comes out

And asks me If your brother's gay If your brother's gay What a weird question For someone from the future I have to know Why If you know

If you don't know Why would I know You're from the future My thing didn't make Any god damn sense If people in the future Don't have to ask us questions about the past. We have to ask them questions about the future. You would say to this person, before you go, is my brother gay?

Yeah. You know, the one, the one who does the fun crimes. Yeah. And oh, by the way, you look just like Venus Williams. Oh. Hmm. Josh and Benny Safdie. Don't know who they are.

No, we can't do that. We just had them on the show. Oh, wow. 12 siblings. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. I just have a sister.

You know what? I used to want to be the only child. When I was a kid that was probably the thing that I wished for most like when I you know when I wasn't

getting my way or when someone read my diary or when I went in a room and shut it and realized my three sisters

were in there too you know I was like oh I wish I was the only child it would be so much better but now as an adult I just love having a lot of siblings. I love it.

I love it. Yeah, that must have been so hard at times. Yeah, especially since we were poor. But let's not get sad. But now you're glad you have them. I'm really glad that I have them. Like we tell stories, like we reminisce about things that only we experience. Like we know our parents, the same two people in like a very different way.

I'll tell a story and my sister would be like, oh, that's how you saw it? Well, for me, it was like this. And I'm like, what? Well, it's also because with 12 siblings, you're also knowing your parents at such different ages. Yeah. And you're very different. I don't know what the range is, but a 25-year-old versus a 36-year-old, that's a very different person raising kids.

Yeah, the biggest difference is I think it's like 22 years is the biggest. 22 years. Yeah, from the youngest to the oldest. My mom was 20 or maybe 24. My mom was 20 when she had my oldest sister and she was 44 or 46 when she had my youngest brother that's pregnant a lot when my mom went through menopause okay okay this is this is

so apparently the more pregnant you are like the more years of your life you spend pregnant it pushes off menopause oh and so uh like earning stars at starbucks yeah and so i guess my mom's menopause was pushed so far off that when it was happening she was like oh what is this and she was older than everybody else had like having menopause and i was like i think it's menopause. And she was like, no, that can't happen to me. I'm like, I felt so bad for her. That's so interesting. Like the body's like, I don't know. Let's wait a little longer. Yeah.

This lady keeps making kids. We don't, there's this up. We can get some more miles out of this one. Yeah. You know? Yeah. It's like she was like, like just turned 60 and was like,

oh, somebody cut the heat. Like she was, and I was like, this seems obvious to me. Why don't you know? Interesting. Yeah.

Interesting. Yeah. Zaina, thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much. Go watch Kajob's Off on Amazon Prime. And you can catch her in the latest season of Uplo on amazon prime when we come back it's time for rants and we're back before before we get to some rants does every new poll make you want to crawl under

your desk and get into the fetal position, then check out our new subscriber series, Polar Coaster, hosted by none other than Dan Pfeiffer. Big get. Dan will dive deep into what the polls are saying, what we can learn from them, and how we can harness what we've learned to secure democratic wins in 2024 and beyond. The first episode comes out on December 14th. Subscribe now at cricket.com slash friends. I heard a gasp. People are excited. This is cool. This is great. Just uncut fucking Dan Pfeiffer straight in your veins. Crooked.com slash friends to make

sure you have access. Also the holidays are coming up. The Crooked store has we have a bunch of really cool holiday merch that you should check out. So everyone do like they did really there's like really funny great. There's cool ornaments, sweatshirts, ho-ho-homo,

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please welcome Mackenzie and Rachel back to the stage. Woo-hoo! Hi, hi, welcome back. Uh-oh. Hi.

Hi. Now it's time for the rant wheel. Here's how it works. We spin the wheel wherever it lands. Uh-oh. Hi. Hi. Now it's time for the rant wheel. Here's how it works. We spin the wheel wherever it lands. We rant about the topic. This week on the wheel, we have my rant. I don't know what it is yet. We have the lack of dance battles in the real world.

We have tell-all books, making plans, swimsuits, this guy on my flight with a mandolin with no case as his personal item, gift Gift guides and the Apple Store. Let's spin the wheel. It has landed on swimsuits I believe suggested by Rachel. Yeah, that's me on a big time. Okay. It's very hard.

Swimsuits in general, they're not the right material. They're too sticky to your body. And especially if you're masculine and thick at all, every swimsuit that I've ever put on in my entire life looks me dead in my eyes and goes,

you're a pretty little bitch, aren't you? And that's painful. And I don't like that. Also swimsuits, I don't know if you guys have known, but like they're trying to get better. Like there's queer swimsuit brands that are trying their best

to like kind of mask them up, but they still look like you're swimming, but it's prohibition. And we haven't fixed the issues yet. We haven't done it, and I don't like them at all, and I want a 14-piece tuxedo made out of neoprene, and nobody will make that

because everyone's a coward. I like that when you mentioned prohibition, you kind of did a Charleston finger. You did. You noticed that. You really kind of went into it. It was so cool. Yeah, whenever I think Prohibition, I do have that like kind of

black and white song that they use. Yeah, yeah. That voice. I don't know what it is. The talkies. The talkies. They're talking now. When all those movie stars found out that people didn't like their voices. And they're like,

I don't think talking is necessary. Alright, that's your problem let's let's spin it again it has landed on tell all books zaynab i believe this is your suggestion yeah i'm tired of the tell all books i know everybody is i mean listen there were a lot of reasons to get the actors back to work tell-all books was at the top of the list right it's like we don't want to know i actually read um britney spears's tell-all um book uh while i was in line at target um i didn't mean to read it then but it's very short. I was trying to purchase it. But then by the time I got to the register, I was done. So that was that was wild, you know, but it's like,

listen, the tell all book was cool, like in 1994, when we needed like People magazine, and we needed publicists to find out anything about you. But now there's a thing called social media. And it seems like no one can stay off of it. You know, I know everything about you. I know what your kids look like. I know what's going on in your life. I know what dance moves you can do. I know it. You don't have to pack it up in a hard cover and put it in barns. You know, you don't need to. And then it's not really a tell-all. You're telling us what you think we

want to hear so that we buy the book. It's called capitalism. Yeah. They're not tell-alls. They're tell-sums. They're, they're, we don't care. You know, stop wasting the trees. You know, just.

There was another book that just came out about like Megan and Harry. And I was like, what is left in that fucking barrel? Like, what is down there? What is the sludge at the bottom of that tell-all barrel? I don't know what's left. But there's people who can't get enough of it and for those people, I say we put them to work.

We want to get carbon emissions down. Let's get a... Yeah, turn a crank. If you want to read that book, that's fine, but you're going to turn this crank.

Let's spin it again it has landed on gift guides that is me gift guides have been fucking me um pretty hard recently so my wife has a birthday on Christmas. So I have to double up, right? That's a Christmas gift. That's also a birthday gift. I need as much help as I can possibly get. Gift guides have been giving me the worst ideas of all time. I did a Zodiac one recently because I'm trying to like expand my horizons in gift guides.

You can't do the Macy's, Bloomingdale's. You got to go deeper. I did a Zodiac one. It told me to get her based on her Zodiac, a calendar. You can't give your, no, I will be divorced by the end of the year.

A calendar. A calendar. She's a Capricorn. They go full calendar. It's awful. It's awful. So then I go deeper. I go into lesbian gift guide oh boy right

that's practically a hate crime it is unacceptable i mean it's all rainbow it was a neon rainbow sign was the first one uh a subaru like literally a subaru no i mean it's horrid that's a good gift though i mean yeah but she's got a car she doesn't need another one what kind is this super she has a mercedes whoa that was hot how you said it so that's i'm over gift guys because i think that they are bullshit it's a copy paste it's a lot of grilling sets also a little on the nose yes like they're they're coming for the dykes is all i'm saying can i piggyback off of your gripe yeah please i think the rainbow is over i've had enough rainbow don't give me anymore i'm sick of allies giving me rainbow gifts i don't want it i don't want a bottle opener with rainbow i don't want like my and my fiance's name on a cup with

a rainbow on it no more rainbows rainbows are for leprechauns and skittles it's over put them to bed i agree because it's more it's coming in your face being like don't don't forget that you're gay right every holiday don't forget you gay trust me i won't forget grandma brings it up a lot yeah thank you thank you good job thank you so much gift guides they're probably written by chat gpt at this point you probably fell for some chat gpt it feels ai yeah how um horrible it was to lesbians you know what i mean like it was a lot of like poetry journals yeah i'm still stuck on the calendar they didn't say a specific calendar it was a wall calendar wall calendar what if it was like the mayan calendar no no no just a wall calendar just like capricorns are boring here's a calendar yeah. Yeah. Oh my God. It's horrid.

I don't know what to get lesbians. Let's spit it again. And now it's time for my rant. I have two rants. Here they are. Rant number one. I agree with you that the rainbow's been overexposed. The rainbow is too much in our faces, and it has become too ubiquitous,

and it has taken away something from the rainbow. And I think collectively we need to figure out a way to reinvest power in the rainbow because I love the rainbow, and I think the answer is, hey, it doesn't have to be in that order. rainbow and i think the answer the answer is hey it doesn't have to be in that order you know what is a rainbow except six or seven colors having a good time together they can do it in any way you want you know that's all i want i want i want what brian but the real rant i want to make today, the real rant,

and this is something that's genuinely been on my mind. So I decided I wanted to spruce up my bedding. I was like, I am going to do, I want to get a new duvet

and new shams, I believe is the term, and pillows and a blanket. And I was like, I'm going to do it fucking right. I want to make my bed look cool like a like a like a bed in the like a bed from the movies you know like a crate and barrel bed you know where and the thing about it that i have found is it's impossible because there's too many there's too many things to choose between and if you go look and you're like oh you know what I want like in my mind like when I was a kid

and you wandered around like Bed Bath and Beyond may her memory be a blessing or Ikea and they'd have the beds made and it was like the bed from a fantasy life of another world where there were so many pillows it was like pillow pillow pillow pillow and as a kid I thought that was like

that must be what a bed is like that's what the cool that's what a bed of a of success looks like and then you go on these websites and you look at how much bedding they're trying to get you to buy and it's a bit like how in the commercials when they put toothpaste on the thing and it's like a fucking you know they do the the big s of toothpaste and then the dentist is like that's too much and it's like you look at what they put on that thing and it's like blanket it's it's it's sheet blanket duvet blanket pillow pillow pillow pillow pillow pillow pillow i'm paralyzed by the choice of it all i have so many tabs open and i don't know what to do dozens and dozens and dozens of tabs and And I don't know how I'm supposed to buy a duvet in this world until I've seen them all.

And I can't find them all. Because every time you start looking, there are more. And some of them you think, is this dignified and refined? Or is this a child's bed? Is this maximalist? Or am this a child's bed? Is this maximalist? Or am I a fucking clown? And then you see everyone on TikTok

being like, Navy sheets. And it's like, I'm not going to get Navy sheets. But that's a thing? I'd go Tommy Bahama. Tommy Bahama. Classic. Little beers. Yes.

Little palm trees. Yeah. I don't know what to do. And then comes Zayn up like, no. Yeah, no. beers yes little palm trees yeah i don't know what to do i'm saying i'm like no yeah no but i'm like a white bedding type of person yeah that's awesome that's like a fancy hotel is that the answer that's for season right yeah go white and clean yeah oh maybe that's the problem. When you picture, close your eyes and think of a bed.

What's the nicest bed? It's fluffy. Race car. Okay. Fuck. So go Tommy Bahama then. And I do like rainbows and I was hurt by what you said.

So sorry. But isn't it strange that when I see like a rainbow printed anywhere, I do think, you know, gay. But when I see a rainbow after the rain, I don't. Oh, but those ones are gay too. I'll take it. But am I the only one?

I look up and I think, the fags can't have this one. When we come back, we'll end on a high note. And we're back. And now because we all need it, here it is, the high note. Hey, love it. This is Brian from Rochester. I lost my dog in July. He was a French bulldog named Diego. He was super obnoxious and farted all the time

and wasn't really a dog, but I loved him. I ended up having another dog, and then over the weekend I adopted or rescued a Portuguese Water Dog slash Poodle who has loved my life. He's an awesome dog, and he jumps in just at the lake. But anyway,

he is a Portie Poo, not a porty doodle. Just wanted to clarify that in today's episode. Thanks, Lovett. Thanks, Crooked. You guys are awesome. Hey, Lovett and Tanya and Producer Brian and all the rest. This is Lindy. I'm just calling to leave my high note.

Three years ago during the pandemic my wife was uh then girlfriend was diagnosed with breast cancer and she's had a series of recurrences or one recurrence and a bunch of surgeries anyway we got married a year ago actually first we got married in massachusetts just in case uh flor case Florida decided that they didn't want to recognize gay marriage. Then we celebrated on December 17th with all our nearest and dearest in Miami. So we are celebrating one year married and one year, hopefully, cancer free this time. You all have been there standing next to us at every one of these

milestones, and thank you for all that you do and for all the joy that you bring. And let's get out the vote for 2024. Hi, I love it. I'm Jupiter of the band Stuffy Doll. You guys were kind enough to have one of my songs on

in your Out of the Closet, Into the Streets era. I was the screamy one. My highlight is that I just released a new album, Ganymede Gives Up the Ghosts, featuring the incredible Riley Silverman. It's all about being trans and disabled, and it has done so much better than I was expecting or most of my other albums have. And I'm just thrilled that everyone is enjoying it. Thanks so much. Love the show. Hi, John. My name is Raymond. And I just went to your Phoenix show last Thursday, and it was amazing. So thank you for coming. My high note is that I am an alternative high school teacher in northern Arizona, and we have lost two principals in the past six months, and it's been really rough for our school.

We teach a lot of indigenous students and generally underserved communities and kids at our school. And this week, we have finally a new stable principal who is awesome and compassionate and believes in restorative justice and is going to do awesome things for our kids. So it's wonderful that we can get back on track and resume teaching and helping our students to be better humans and to learn that there are people who really care about them in the world. Thank you for doing all you do. Hey, love it. This is Andy. I drive in over 2000 miles between my work schedule and between Alaska and the border

in Washington, and I'm thinking about how nice the Canadians are. It's Trump gets re-elected. Don't forget Mary Peltola, our first-term congresswoman in Alaska. First Democrat in 50 years. She's awfully lonely in our purple state. Pro-fish, pro-choice. Support Mary Peltola.

Look her up. She needs your help uh we love some people from the lower 48s pitching in thanks thanks to everybody who shared a high note tonight if you want to leave us a message about something that gave you hope call us at 323-538-2377 that is our show thank you so much to benny safty mackenzie goodwin and rachel scanlon zaynab johnson and ryan grim there are 331 days until the 2024 elections. Thank you all for coming out and have a great night. If you're already doom scrolling, don't forget to follow us at Crooked Media on Instagram and Twitter. You can also find Love It or leave it. content and a great discussion on Discord. Plus, it's a great way to get involved with Vote Save America. So sign up today at crooked.com slash friends. Love It or Leave It is a Crooked Media

production. It is written and produced by me, John Lovett, and Lee Eisenberg. Kendra James is our executive producer. Brian Semel is our producer, and Malcolm Whitfield is our associate producer. Hallie Kiefer is our head writer. Sarah Lazarus, Jocelyn Kaufman, Peter Miller, Alan Pierre, Will Miles, and Mohana Dalsheki are our writers. Evan Sutton is our editor. Kyle Seglin and for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast, and to our digital producers, Zuri Irvin, David Tolles, Mia Kelman, and Matt DeGroot for filming and editing video each week so you can't see because this is a podcast and your digital producers, Zuri Ervin, David Toles, Mia Kelman and Matt DeGroote for filming and editing video each week so you can.