Lovett or Leave It - Harp of Darkness

Episode Date: August 19, 2026

Jared Kushner turns on the charm, Natalie Harp prints her heart out, and SBA Administrator Kelly Loeffler adjusts to life on planet Earth. Jimmi Simpson joins us to discuss alternate realities, ayahuasca, and being normal. Harry Sisson shares some thoughts on Democratic messaging, and finds out just how online he really is (spoiler: very). The Rant Wheel takes a meta spin, and we bring it all home with a round of Second Thoughts.Hate listening to ads? Become a Friends of the Pod subscriber for ad-free episodes of Pod Save America, Pod Save the World, Lovett or Leave It, Runaway Country, Offline with Jon Favreau, and more—plus exclusive content, including bonus episodes of Pod Save America. Subscribe now at crooked.com/friends, on Apple Podcasts, or through the Pod Save America YouTube channel.To watch this episode with subtitles, click here and turn on closed captions (CC).You can request a transcript by emailing [e-mail]. Include the podcast name, episode title, and air date. Please allow 48 hours for delivery.

If you miss some of your favorite crooked pods this week, don't worry. You can now catch up on the week's best moments on MS Now on Saturday nights. MS Now is streaming an episode of highlights from your favorite crooked pods, packing as much analysis, funny moments, and 100% correct opinions into 40 minutes as humanly possible. Crooked on MS Now airs every Saturday at 9 p.m. Eastern, 6 p.m. Pacific. What's up, Los Angeles? Welcome to Love It or Leave It Live It Live! Live it live from Hollywood. I'm John Lovett, and people call me the human printer, because I only work 5% of the time.

Let's get into it. What a week. The 60-day ceasefire agreement between the U.S. and Iran has officially expired, but I tasted it, and it's fine. According to the Wall Street Journal, Iran has used these last two months to develop a strategy for when the war resumes, including escalatory attacks on undersea telecom cables and pressure on Iran's neighbors to recognize Iran's control of the Strait of Hormuz. What the heck is a strategy?

Asked Pete Hegseth. Is that a Muslim thing? Here's Fox News describing Trump's comments about that strategy. Now, I asked the president about these parallel talks that are taking place between Iran and Oman about control of the Strait of Hormuz. And the president told Fox News, if Oman gets in the way, we'll bomb the S out of them. Seems like a weird way for Trump to talk about an ally like Oman. But remember, this is the guy who had his best friend, Jeffrey Epstein killed.

Meanwhile, yeah. Meanwhile, last week, you were right to applaud. Meanwhile, last week, the Navy Times and Stars and Stripes reported on low morale and multiple attempts by sailors to jump overboard on the USS Lincoln, an aircraft carrier that's been deployed to the Middle East for nearly nine months with a record 249 consecutive days without a port of call. Ironically, being stuck at sea and far from home means these sailors will never get to experience the odyssey in 70-millimeter iMacs.

Democratic officials have raised concerns about conditions on the ship, including shortages of food and basic supplies, mold, water contamination, and plumbing issues. These conditions are unacceptable, said one senator. This is a naval vessel, not a carnival cruise. And here's how Trump responded. Well, no, that ship is moving, no, they're not.

His appointment's got on too long. No, no, no. Not nearly long enough. Not nearly long enough. But Trump said not to worry. To put the USS Lincoln out of its misery, he's sending the USS John Wilkes booth. Oh, no.

Mike Johnson, the Speaker of the House, was asked about Trump's unsympathetic comments and said this. We've got to make sure that they're cared for properly, and I'm comforted to the Commander-in-Chief and Secretary of Hick-Seth and everybody, of Hongkow, who is the Secretary of the Navy, that they have all hands on deck and they're making sure that's taken care of. Added Johnson, sure it's hot and sweaty and everyone's on top of one another. Nowhere to go, nowhere to escape, nowhere to put the urges, the feelings, just time and pressure

and the monotony of the days and the nights. My God, the knights, all these seemen bound by struggle and duty and isolation and sweat and blood and the grime of life on board a ship where the rules of the land do not apply, each roll of the wave washing off an inhibition, a doubt until there is nothing but you and him and the ink-black formless forgetting sea. Any other questions? Trump's son-in-law and business skeleton, Jared Kushner, met with Hamas and Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu this week in an effort to salvage the administration's 15-step peace plan for Gaza.

Wait, they added three more steps. Now I'm definitely not doing it, said Pete Hegsef, confusing two meetings. The conversation went smoothly, though there was one. Kishner accidentally swapped the gifts for Hamas and Bibi, said Hamas, oh cool, a sater plate crafted by a Holocaust survivor. We definitely don't have one of these. Added Benjamin Netanyahu, oh wow, a signed picture of Zoran Mamdani. You shouldn't have. Kushter met with Netanyahu for several hours, pressing Israel's leader not to, quote, create obstacles in the way of the peace plan. But of course, he is the obstacle. Bill, one minute on the clock.

Netanyahu once again said last week that there will be no Palestinian state on his watch, which means any agreement is predicated on it ultimately failing. It's almost as if Netanyahu spent years undermining the Palestinian Authority, expanding settlements in the West Bank, isolating Gaza, and funding Qatari money into the strip as part of an explicit effort to prop up Hamas, and in Netanyahu's hubris, while distracted by schemes to subvert the judiciary and evade corruption charges, he failed to appreciate the mounting threat to Israel, culminating in the attacks of October 7th, and the brutal war that followed in which a campaign of retribution killed tens of thousands of civilians, along with many of the hostages, feeding a vicious circle in which Israel's

isolation and vulnerability have tilted the country's politics further toward the militant right, which, along with the war in Iran, is destroyed bipartisan support for Israel and America, and put at risk an alliance that has protected Israel since its founding almost 80 years ago. That's almost what it's like. But at least Trump has his best mind on the case, a soft-handed mogul who managed to lose money on New York real estate with zero foreign policy expertise, but who happened to marry Ivanka and who Trump put on the Israel account because he's confused by all the ha-haha-ha-jibberish at his daughter's wedding, but then realized that being Jewish was about more than selling diamonds and complaining about the air-conditioning at his hotels. Almost, almost.

And speaking of tall people who make us uncomfortable, opposed by Kelly Loughler, the head of the Small Business Administration, has raised quite a stir. Watch this. We're all ready, so... Administrator, we have some questions for you here at TikTok. What's going on, Mac? First of all, are you in the cabinet? Well, actually I am. After I had an incredible conversation with the president by phone to become SBA administrator, he texted me and said, actually, you're going to be in the cabinet. That's a really

big deal. For those listening at home, Kelly Loeffler walks down a hallway very slowly with a binder that seems to be empty and a body that seems to belong to an alien. She then lifts her aid by the scruff of her neck and swallows her hole. What's your favorite thing about being small business administrator? Well, obviously being out with small businesses. whether I'm walking a factory floor with a small manufacturer or in a small family-owned generational restaurant, I can see the impact that the SBA is having through the work that our team does every day. My favorite thing about small business is small business.

My other favorite thing about small business is I love having an endoskeleton covered by several layers of viscera, muscle, and skin. Much better than having exopods extending from a carapace. Am I right, people? Last question. How tall are you? With or without heels. Without.

Let's just say, without heels, I'm 511 and a half. Thank you for your time. Oh, ha ha, I'm 71.5 earth inches, when my antenna are sheathed, of course. Can we take a break for a snack? I want to eat a computer. I mean a banana. Fuck. But Lawfler isn't the only Trump official giving people the weirds this week.

Georgia Senator John Ossoff sparked a media storm at his rally over the weekend when he said this. The president sleeps through his meetings. He golfs and trades stocks. See, he doesn't want to do the job. He wants to build his ballroom and travel with Natalie on their apparently defenseless flying palace gifted by the Emir of Qatar. Who's Natalie? Natalie Harp is a Trump aide and former host for the far-right news outlet OAN. And there has long been speculation about her deeply strange relationship with Donald Trump, which is highlighted in regime change,

the book by Maggie Haberman and Jonathan Swan. According to that book, Hart quote, wrote Trump adoring letters that she left in his personal spaces, including one that read, You are all that matters to me. Which is such bullshit.

The only notes my staff ever leaves in my personal spaces say things like, you can't nap in that conference room. We have a production meeting with Stacey Abrams. In a different Trump book, the author in Sleysbag, Michael Wolfe,

included this excerpt from a different letter by harp to Trump, quote, Please, when I fail, will you tell me? You have the absolute right to cuss me out if need be when I deserve it because no one knows or cares about me more. See, it's nice when an employee respects their boss, appreciates their feedback, and doesn't start a union, which I support.

Now, sure. Now conservatives have said, how dare you? Harp feels indebted to Trump for saving her life from cancer. You absolute ghouls. And sure enough, here is Natalie. Harp speaking at the 2020 Republican Convention celebrating the so-called right-to-try law that Trump signed during his first term. They didn't give me the right to try experimental treatments, Mr. President. You did. And without you,

I'd have died waiting for them to be approved. That's a moving story. It is not true. By Natalie's own account, the treatment she received for cancer was an off-label use of an FDA-approved drug, which was already allowed by law and common practice in oncology. And you don't have to take my word for it. According to the Washington Post, Natalie tweeted about getting this treatment in March of 2018. Trump didn't sign the right to try bill until May of 2018. So the official story about why she is so devoted to Trump is a lie. But it's her lie. So she knows that's not why she's so obsessed with Trump. But then why is she so obsessed with Trump? I'm glad she'd be cancer, but is there there any experimental medicine that can cure whatever the fuck is going on here?

Anyway, Harb's nickname is the human printer because she's known for carrying a portable device to print hard copies of emails, social media posts, and articles for the president. For example, one aide might say to another aid, don't go in there, the president is busy fucking the human printer. And it turns out, when Trump left Air Force One, in that catering, truck, leaving Marco Rubio and Scott Besson behind, Natalie Harp went in that truck with him. My God, you've never looked so beautiful, said Trump stroking a case of Diet Coke behind Natalie Harp. Now, Trump was forced to respond to a question about this during an Oval Office press event on Monday

and offered this. What are you going to travel with your aid, Natalie Harp, and build the ballroom than do your job as president? What is your response, John Alsup? You mean Pee-Wee-Herman? Pee-wee-Herman look-al-like. He's losing his edge, but I suppose that's what happens when you're in love. We've got a great show for you tonight, and we'll be right back with Jimmy Simpson. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up.

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Money is on the line. Always say hello with Quo. Try Quo for free. Plus get 20% off your first six months when you go to Quo.com slash love it. That's QUO.com slash love it. This episode is presented by Planned Parenthood Federation of America. If you listen to this show, what you obviously do, you already know. This administration, Congress and the courts have spent the past few years making it as difficult as possible to get health care in this country. Last year, the Supreme Court paved the way for states to exclude Planned Parenthood health centers from state Medicaid programs in Medina versus Planned Parenthood, a clear violation of patients' rights to get care from quality providers of their choosing. Also last year, the Trump administration and Congress defunded Planned Parenthood in an attempt to shut it down and curtail access

to birth control, cancer screenings, SDI testing, and more for low-income patients. Alongside people like you and mean, Planned Parenthood fights every day to build the future we deserve one where everyone can get the care they need no matter who they are or where they live. Planned Parenthood as always and will always fight back, but they need your help to keep going, no matter the side. your donation makes a difference, helping Planned Parenthood meet this moment and protect patient access to care where and when it matters most. If you believe all people deserve health care, no matter their income, donate now at planparenthood.org slash defend. That's planparenthood.org slash defend. And we're back. Jimmy Simpson will be joining me in just a moment. But first,

Friends of the Pod, we cannot wait to see many of you at CrookedCon. Quick reminder, there are only a limited number of Friend of the Pod tickets for CricketCon. And they are about to sell out. So if you want to take advantage of the discount and get perks on site, now is the time to grab your tickets. And if you're not yet a paid subscriber, there are even more reasons to join, like subscriber-only shows, like Pod Save America Only Friends, and access to exclusive substack newsletters. Best of all, you'll be supporting pro-democracy media that you can trust. So please go to crookedcon.com to get tickets or to join Friends of the Pod. And if you're in LA, you can still get tickets for this show, love it or leave it at crooked.com slash events. We've got

Great guests coming up, including Emmy Rossum, Chris Olson, the Daily Show's Josh Johnson, and the great writer-director Dustin Lance Black. That's at Cricket.com slash events for those tickets. All right. My first guest is an actor you know from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and other chilling television dystopias. Please welcome to the stage. Jimmy Simpson. Good to see you.

I appreciate it. Oh, it's got to hug you. Oh, my God. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Oh, no. No.

No. I am Jack. Thank you for notice. noticing. Thank you for no, thank you for saying that. That compliment works for me. Hi, it's so nice to meet you. It's really nice to meet you, man. So, that means a lot. You have, so I was, we were talking about where a lot of people first saw you. And it was when you were David Letterman's intern. You were Lyle the intern. You were Lyle the intern. That, and here's what I want to, I don't know if any of you have seen Jimmy as Lyle the intern, but what is amazing about it. First of all, I would say the first two

or three times you were on Letterman, it barely worked. It barely worked, but they clearly liked it. It was supposed to be a one-off. And Letterman, after the first one, was just like, letterman, after the first one, was just like, let's get Lyle back. I want to bring Lyle back. And, yeah, but what's amazing about it is you are, like, on this show that is so controlled by David Letterman, he is so in charge. You're not known to the audience. You're not a celebrity. You're not a celebrity, you're just a guy sitting in the chair pretending to be a loudly intern, and you totally kind of bully and take over and kind of run the show. And like, I don't understand how you could like muster that confidence to do that with Dave Letterman. So how did you do that? Well, you know,

the reason I got the part, I was mostly had done Sunny. And then the writers of Letterman CBS show, the Stangle Brothers, great guys, they were what happened to be doing. I randomly auditioned in La Jolla for Aaron Sorkin's last Broadway show. about the creation of television. I got Philo Farnsworth. It's called the Farnsworth invention. So my mug was on this poster at the music box theater.

The Stangle Brothers walked by and they're like, that's the creepy dude from Sunny. He must be in New York. Let's have him show up for this little idea we had. And so the confidence was simply that I was performing in front of a Broadway audience

for a couple months by then with the words of Aaron Sorkin. And so, you know, the first time there was just no rehearsal. They just stuck me in the wings. The top ten finishes finishing the music. Paul's there with his little band. And then they just pushed me out.

And so I just clopped over all the way to the couch and just took a spot. And Dave started kind of moving away. The script was great, and there's cue cards. But Dave would be like, what is that? What are you doing? And so we started getting a little fresh with each other. And he loved it when I'd take the piss out of him. So that was always a thing.

It was the recurring joke is that I wouldn't take any shit from him. Dave. It was so good so. It's a, it's a, if you haven't seen it, you should go, it's, they have like a compilation of them and it's an amazing thing to watch you basically bullied Dave Letterman week after week after week after week and just sort of like, kind of making fun of him, acting like you don't care about the show, kind of like, kind of like intimidating Paul. It's a crazy thing. The Paul, I was, I was playing that I kind of had a crush on Paul. Um, so when I walked off, I, and there was, that was never scripted. Every time I walked off, I'd address him somehow. And the,

insults were great. I was doing the Farnsworth invention with Hank Azaria, and we were hanging out at his place. He'd seen some of the episodes. He's like, hey, can you, can you call Dave Nancy Reagan for me? I'm like, you got it. So that's in there. You could, because Hank Zer just gave you him. Hang asked me if I could just use that as one of the insults calling him Nancy Reagan. So I did. That's so cool. Yeah. So you're in Dark Matter on Apple TV Plus, the plus stands for shows. for more stuff. And it's about a guy who gets caught in an alternative reality and is then confronted with the many other realities

he could have lived through its life. And do you believe in alternate realities? Yeah, yeah, I think anything's possible. I kind of approach the universe with an open mind. But this show, yeah, it kind of asks, you know, the passing question, what if I made different choices and he responds with, like, Well, you'd still be you, so don't get cocky, you know.

Oh, you'd still be you. Yeah. Everybody's kind of the same. We all play a bunch of different characters, and they're all, you know, have the same kind of intentions and desires. They just have had different circumstances. Dark Matter is kind of like,

it's a wonderful life with a little more kidnapping and way more quantum physics. That's right on my alley. There you go. That's on my street. So you've also been doing these ayahuasca ceremonies. And I feel like it has to be tied to doing a show about alternate realities because it seems like ayahuasca is about kind of altering your connection to reality in some way.

But like you've done this multiple times. You've done multiple ayahuasca ceremonies. Yeah. Yeah. For about eight years, it's been a pretty huge part of my life. What happens? So you, what's the goal? Why did you go?

What's it? Like, I hear people doing it. And then some, we were talking about that we heard about somebody who'd done ayahuasca and then came back and said they didn't want to do their podcast anymore. And so we decided I can't do it. Amazing. I got too much invested in this. I'd say what happens kind of in a nutshell is you, you're able to let go. You know, it touches your subconscious. And so what you really want is what you really want. Your authentic self, it's always existed. And so with the AIA, you're able to kind of let go of the shoulds and the shoulds of society, of your job. And you see it less of like,

oh, I need to be hotter, better, richer, more successful. And not. And not. And you see it less of like, oh, I need to be hotter, better, richer, more successful. And a lot of that stuff falls away because that's just convention that's applied to us for our entire lives. And so you're able to see a bit more clearly and see yourself as, you know, as necessary, an essential part of the universe.

Huh. But if I'm not striving to be hotter, better, richer, more successful, I'm nothing. That's the entirety of my being. I see. So I worry about what happens if I find out that all of that was something I shouldn't have been focused on at all times 24 hours a day because I might feel bad about every single decision I've ever made.

You wouldn't, you wouldn't. Well, you might. You might actually feel that way. But most people, everyone but you, realizes, oh, a lot of these attachments, and you might find a deeper connection to the attachments, but regardless, you would be shedding external shoulds and shouldn'ts that you didn't know you needed to shed,

and you'd just feel lighter and feel a little more in touch with yourself. I've never seen someone go through the process and not find some more peace than what they have in their life. Right, wow, maybe I'll do it. And there's apparently male and female varieties of ayahuasca. Is that right? Well, ayahuasca is a female vine. And so there's a lot of maternal energy in ayahuasca. But then it's often balanced with Wachuma, which is the grandfather plant.

You have the grandmother plant, ayahuasca, and then Wachuma, the grandfather plan, which is less of an immersive, mind-blowing experience, and more of a ability to open up yourself. And you're going to journal, you're going to talk to the other people there. Oh, no. Yeah, yeah. And you're going to enjoy the journaling. I have to talk.

I have to journal? Mm-hmm. You're going to like talking to strangers. Wow. It's an experience. But talking to strangers, but no goal or outcome? Exactly. You're not trying to impress anybody.

Not trying to get anything from it? No. A conversation without trying to do something? or make something happen for myself? Nope. Not just usually waiting for my turn to talk? I don't even understand what you're saying. That will fall away.

That sucks. And then you'll come back. You'll come back and you can hop right back into your regular life if you want to. Or you could pull some of those lessons you learned into your real life. That's my greatest fear. Pulling in the lessons. That's always been my fear. So now you're also in Walking Dead, Dead.

city. Yeah. So I have often felt that in zombie post-apocalyptic zombie worlds, that there's always this moment where like the town is overrun when the thing falls apart, when their efforts to kind of protect the thing is, it becomes, it's always very, very difficult. And I've always thought, well, once you've got the town and you've built the fence, then the zombies outside the fence, they're really just tigers, but if they bite you, you become a tiger. Exactly. But then that's just two tigers. And we can kill two tigers. You know what I'm saying? I do know what you're saying.

And, you know, the science of these undead, I understand it completely when it's being explained to me. And then 10 seconds later, it's gone because it needs to be a story. It needs to be a storybook. But their reality that I've found, because I wasn't super clear about the show. I hadn't seen many episodes. So once I got the offer, I decided to get into it.

And I'm like, oh, they don't really have the answers either. But what is true is there is an endless amount of walkers. They call their zombies walkers surrounding the fence. And there are countless holes and rusting bits, and they'll always find the way in. You know what I always think when I see a zombie movie or show is, is this a world where they had zombie movies? And they're like, oh, my God, like in the movies. Or is it a world where they didn't have those? But that raises all kinds of questions.

Because then it's like, wait. So was there no evil dead movies? series, so then what were the people in that up to? You know what I'm saying? I know exactly. Like how Julia Roberts looks like Julia Roberts and Ocean's 12, but then wait what? I think the premise has to be this didn't exist, which is the largest tragedy, because I'm a huge fan of the Evil Dead franchise. Yeah, it's so good. And

it would have prepared them in some way. And so this world didn't get to have that because otherwise they would know better how to handle it. And your character is kind of built an ecosystem of like the zombies feed the chickens and the chickens feed the ducks and the ducks feed the pigs and the pigs feed the people with different animals but yeah that's that's the concept and coyotes yeah coyotes are the top of the chain I mean he gets he has the maggots feed on the flesh of the zombies and then frogs feed on the flesh of the maggots and then the turkeys eat

frogs and then the coyotes eat the turkeys which are surprising delicious according to this character but what really kind of pulled me in was this you know everybody's pretty precious in the Walking Dead because they're all in survival mode. And that's a vibe. But also this guy shows up and his life before this apocalypse was really difficult.

He was a cop. He saw shit. He saw humans being destructive and liars. And so when he gets to the apocalypse, he just holds up with a couple zombies. Like you said, wild animals. They have teeth, they have fangs. They will kill you,

but you know exactly what their intention is. And so he's actually finally at peace this guy. What do you think would happen if you gave one of the zombies ayahuasca? Oh shit. Somebody to think about it. I think the head would explode. Because it's a soft tissue.

It's rotting tissue. Yeah, they're dead in there. It's a magic thing, you know. They're decaying, but they're still moving. But it can't withstand ayahuasca. That's even more magical. So, you've,

like, I remember watching you on Syke, where you played a kind of creepy dude on Syke, like an investigator, who kind of they always thought might be a killer too. Mary Lightley. And you play this kind of creepy character on Always Sunny, Lyle the intern a little bit, creepy. You don't seem creepy.

You're drawn to these creepy people, but there is like a kind of like intent. There's a way in which you don't, you kind of hold the gaze. Like you're not, there's nothing about the intensity of the eye contact. Right now. You seem fully clicked in with a kind of preternatural kind of confidence. Like the only way this moment ends is if I look away. Is that connected? Is there a connection between like,

you being locked in as a kind of confidence in playing the creepy characters? Like, why did you kept getting, like, why were these your big opportunities when you seem like a lovely person? Well, you know, yeah, my mother really wondered why I was getting these roles when I started, and I was just pretty grateful.

But I don't know if it's the shape of my eyebrow, the face I have, but I think the work itself, I always approach all of these characters as, yeah, they are in insane conditions, They have insane environments, but their humanity is true to them. So, yeah, Mary lightly comes off creepy, but he thinks he's just doing the best work possible, and he just happens to shake hands like this, you know?

It sucks. Yeah, it's soft and off-putting. But to him, it's right, and so that's how he does it. The McPoyles don't think through the nemesi of the gang. They think the gang's kind of encroaching on their space whenever they interact. They're following their heart, and that's what I play. If you're playing the villain, I think you're missing the point of what humans are. So given your past roles as someone who was trying to invest humanity into these strange characters,

we were curious about how normal you actually were, which is why it's time for a segment we're calling Jimmy Simpson is a normal guy probably. Again, let's do it. I'm wearing maroon in this photo. You are wearing maroon. That's a normal photo for a normal guy. Here's how it works. I'm going to ask you some normal guy questions,

and you just answer them honestly without overthinking it. There are no right answers, but there are wrong ones. Yeah, there are. Here we go. Most will be that. Go ahead. What did you have for breakfast this morning? Eggs, toast, and coffee.

It's the simple breakfast of a man who wants to stay alive, but isn't making it, you know, his whole personality. So I'm just doing it. Wow, the breakfast was normal. The explanation was not. So that's interesting. Unexpected. Yeah, there's layers.

Which of the... Just the breakfast of a guy trying to stay alive. I'll be thinking about that one. Which of the following would you choose as a pet? Turtle, snake, guinea pig, or ferret? Ferret. Ah, the correct answer was dog.

God damn it. You trapped me. You walk into a public bathroom with three urinals. The urinal on the left is in use. You can take the middle urinal, which is right next to the peeing stranger, or the urinal on the right,

which would leave a... gap at the floor in front is wet. There is also one stall which is empty. What is your move? My move is to tuck in next to my neighbor and share a, share a sesh. That's cool. I think that's right. I think that's right. I think that's right. I think that's right. I don't want bathroom water on my show. Yeah, you don't want the bathroom water. You don't have to go all the way to stall. This is the situation. But then you're like, does that guy know that there's water on that urinal floor or does he think you're weird? But that's not my concern. My concern is my own experience. And so he could feel that way. God, that's a lot.

That's cool. It's completely alien to me. What item is in the trunk of your car right now? An old blanket covered in dirt. Wow, that's normal. Not body dirt, okay? Stop it. Stop it. Not body dirt. Hey, you ever just drink a big glass of milk? Not in at least 30 years. Wow, 30 years since a glass of milk. It's 10 p.m. in your home by yourself. What are you doing? watching a movie watching a movie at home at 10 p.m.

I'm halfway through the movie because I'm trying to get to bed early these days. All right, all right, that's good. That's normal. I think that's normal. We'll give it to you. If they made lab-grown human meat, would you try it? I wouldn't do it. That's correct. I don't need it. Yeah, we don't need it. Why would I do that? Yeah, why do you want to know if it's good? Don't want to know if it's good. We don't want to develop a taste for it. You know, like the bear in that film, The Edge. All right, you're normal. And Dark Matter hits Apple TV Plus on August 28th,

and check out the Walking Dead, colon, Dead City on AMC. And Jimmy will be back for the rainwheel. Can't wait. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. Love It is brought to you by Thrive Market. Back to School season brings enough stress.

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These offers stack. So you're getting the sale and our discount. You cannot get this deal on the website. It's only through our link. So use the link Thrivemarket.com slash Love It to get $30 off your first two orders plus an extra 25% off during their end of summer sale. Sign up before this offer ends. Love it or leave it is brought to you by Bombas. Summer's here and we are living for all things outdoors from going to the beach or barbecues. Bombas makes your comfiest summer staples so you can make the most out of all your summer plans. They've got a whole line of pro level sports specific socks for golf, yoga, the gym, and for every kind of runner.

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or at least what I perceive it to be? Sure. I'm red. You're red? I'm red. Why? So, yesterday was my only free day in L.A. I've been here for like three or four days, so I had nothing to do yesterday.

And I thought it's a good idea to go to the beach. I went to Zuma Beach. You got to go to the beach. You're in Los Angeles. Because you're not from here. No, I'm not. I live in New York City. And so, but, you know, also, I am a political commentator,

which means I don't go outside very much, right? That's what I do all day. And I decided to go to the beach with only a towel and a bottle of water in my backpack. And I stayed out there for three hours. The UV was like nine. And now I'm very red. And I'm in a lot of pain. But I'm going through it.

And I wanted to be here. Thank you for. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, I will just say, thank you for not canceling over a sunburn. Appreciate that. We got to use sunscreen. We got to use sunscreen.

Listen, you're young. You think, oh. no, no, you got to use the sunscreen. And, well, you know, I was like looking up sunburns after the fact on Google and it was essentially telling me I'm going to die of cancer now. Yeah, it's there, I wasn't going to say it because it's post, no reason to say it after the sunburn. But I do think as a society, we sort sunburn. It's sort of like how drunk driving went from oopsie daisy to like, it's terrible, you know, like it would

shifted over time in the same way, like sunburns are still kind of in the oopsie daisy category, but they're so bad for you. They're so bad. It's okay. All right. So you're sort of in this kind of online, progressive, kind of like, the debate me coward sphere of the internet a little bit. What is the, like, what is the, what do you think about all of this, like, kind of the fact that there's so much interest in watching people kind of debate each other, like Jubilee and all the rest? I mean, I think it's interesting. It's like a really kind of new phenomenon, I think, in the internet for the most part. I mean, it's kind of what had led to Charlie Kirk's rise or Ben Shapiro's rise is kind of like the debate me bro liberal gets owned.

And it's like them debating a college student. But, you know, nonetheless, it's really grown in recent years. It's like a big thing on TikTok now. They're like whole TikTok lives dedicated to doing debates. And I'm like, I think it's good and I think it's bad. I think it's good because, you know, for people who maybe don't pay attention to news as much as some others, it's like a really easy and digestible way to learn something that maybe you didn't know before. I think it's bad, though, because I have seen it be used by bad actors to be very grifty

and make a lot of money from it and be dishonest or be bad faith with debates. And so, like, I think there's positives and negatives. I think we'll see how it plays out in the next couple of years. Yeah, there's something about it where, like, so there's obviously the ways in which it's done in bad faith, right? Like somebody who has a bunch of facts at their disposal, they're kind of ready for this, going against someone who doesn't and doesn't have as, doesn't have as, like, fully forged an ideology or kind of doesn't have

the set of facts at the ready. But then at the same time I think like, well, you know, like say you're in you're learning physics and you spend a lot of time understanding the mechanics of a theory or something and then you kind of learn the theory and then at some point you kind of say well, now that I know why the theory is true

I can shed all the, I don't need to keep in my mind all the undergirding principles that led to me understanding this thing. And maybe I have a deeper understanding of it that I could draw upon but I won't have the facts at the But it's only in politics where if you do a ton of research and come to a conclusion, if you don't continue to maintain the full body of facts behind it, as if being able to recall the data that justified an idea proves you have a better

better understanding of it or that like quick recall somehow proves something. And I do think there's something fundamental about debates that Ben Shapiro's of the world kind of take advantage of. So I don't know, like, it's almost as if, like, people being able to quickly pull up facts shouldn't really matter, but it matters so much in how we do politics now. Yeah, absolutely. You know, and you're right. I mean, I think, like, in the political content creation space, being a good faith online debater is really tough because of the reason you just described. It's like, you know, the Supreme Court has rulings every single year for the summer. They have rulings in the middle of it as well. You know, Congress is constantly doing things. The

laws constantly updating. And so in order to really be aware, you have to stay up to date on all of that. And that's a lot to do. But unfortunately, I think, you know, primarily in the right, there are a lot of Republicans who don't do that. And they're like, you know, stuck in their ways. They'll never change. So we have, like, a lot of intra-democratic debate about the DSA versus sort of the center left of the party. On the one hand, I think it is obviously a positive to have candidates on the left. having their version of a, of a program that is commensurate with the scale of the problems we have and that are energizing and exciting to people, telling people that a really more, a different kind of politics is possible. On the other hand, there are times where I see what the kind of DSA national party is up to,

and I think perhaps it was designed in a lab to make Democrats lose. Where are you on this? Oh, man. I'm like, I said this on MS Now recently. I, you know, we're having this debate right now. And Pod Save America has been attacked in this debate a lot. And it's like the DSA versus moderates or liberals or whatever you want to call them. I just don't want that debate to happen right now.

Like the midterms are right there. If we could not punch each other in the face for the next three months, it'd be great. And then, you know, for the 2028 election, I'm sure there will be a presidential candidate who's more DSA or DSA adjacent. And I'm sure there's going to be a presidential candidate who's more moderate and kind of like a liberal or whatever it is. that's the place to have the debate and then come together after whoever the candidate is. But I kind of just, I want us to hold off. Yeah, the challenge, right, I agree, obviously.

Like, I think part of the reason this sort of debate has been happening is because we were just wrapping up the last of the primaries in the last sort of week or two. But then, you know, Hakeem Jeffries will be asked because it's been, because if you watch, we will have Fox News on in our office sometimes, and if you watch Fox News these days, it is somebody from the DSA saying something dumb,

it's Asan Piker, then it's a trans athlete, and then back and forth. Those are the kind of the three topics, right? Like DSA craziness, Hassan Piker transports. That's it. That's like kind of the universe. But then so Hakeem Jeffrey's asked, and he says like, well, I don't support the DSA agenda. I have my own agenda, which is a reasonable thing to say, but it is him waiting into the fight. So we're kind of, I guess part of it is, I agree.

Like, we shouldn't be forced to have this endless debate right now. We need to come together. but at the same time, I do think there is something about, like, we are going to have to figure out how to have a big movement, but in which everyone understands that their words will be used to tar each other, you know? Yeah, I mean, I have, like, two immediate thoughts, which is, number one, I say this to people behind the scenes and sometimes publicly. It's that, you know, if somebody's, like, DSA adjacent versus somebody's a moderate,

for the most part, those people are all good people. Like, they're not trying to destroy the Democratic Party or infiltrate, or make us all lose or whatever. They're just people who want what's best for their neighbors, their family, their friends, and they just disagree about how to get there. So I think it's important to have like a humanity aspect of that debate, especially when we're debating on the, on the

Democratic side. But also the debate is just so stupid. Like, Hassan you're right, like Hassan Pikers on Fox News 2470, he's become like a national figure more so than he was already. And he's like the center of the debate and it's Fox News playing these clips of him or clips of candidates saying something and taking it out of context.

And the debate's not in good faith, It just feels stupid to me, and that's like I really stay out of it. I'm like, you know, whoever the Democratic candidates, I endorse. That's what I go with. Who are some Democratic communicators really like right now? Like, who are some people that you think are doing a great job, figuring out how to break through on Elon's internet? I mean, I think the best example in recent years has to be Zerran Mandani, right? I mean, he, like, really changed the way that people campaign. You're seeing, like, other candidates kind of copy the style, which is, like, fine. great if they can get through. But he is such an amazing communicator, whether it be these press

conferences where he's asked like really stupid questions. Like what kind of sandwich would you serve Hamas? And he's like, you know, what a stupid question? Why would I have to answer that? I think him, I think Pete Buttigieg as well is great. I've always been a fan of Pete. And I think like any of the major candidates who are talking about 2028 are fantastic as well, like Gavin Newsom, AOC. They're all really good. It's funny because people copy the Mamdani videos. And there's always this debate in video games, which is when is something a copycat and when is something a genre?

Like when did making games that were like Dark Souls or Bloodborn, when did that become not just copying it, but actually this is now a genre that you can make your own version of. And I do think the difference between a copycat, someone copying Mom Donnie and someone participating in the Mom Donny genre is how good the video is. And I do think that if Karen Bass doing a pothole video

but not filling the pothole, probably not part of the genre. You know what I'm saying? That's a tough one to defend, I think. Yeah. You know, if you get asked about that, that was a tough one. You got to put that, you got to get that pothole fixed. If you're going to do the pothole video. Yeah, if you can't make a video out of, it's not fixed.

Yeah, just wait. Yeah, just wait. You're in charge of what's the video. Exactly. Nobody has to see this until the potholel's done. Right. It's crazy. You're in charge of the edit. Yeah.

Just wait. Oh, there's a car there? Well, let's not do this now. Yeah, right. Seems like easy to me. But whatever. What do I know? So we had David Packman, who's also on YouTube.

and, you know, he just wrote about kind of fighting in the attention economy. You're sort of in the, in the trenches, the algorithm minds. What are you like, right now, what is breaking through? And like, what does that tell you about how people are engaging with politics, say, on YouTube? Well, so I started on short form. I've moved to long form now. Congratulations. Thank you.

I appreciate it. I'm still on both. And I think it depends on the platform. So I think the unfortunate reality, and I feel like you spoke to Pacman about this on YouTube, is that the titles have to be like hyper sensationalized. They have to be all caps or whatever that is. And that's unfortunately just the game that people have to play. And so any story that really has like Trump getting owned, I think, you know, is kind of like a generally successful formula.

But on short form, it's a little bit different. And so at least in the past week or so I'll speak to, stories that have been really resonating on my platform have been like Natalie Harp, as you mentioned. or Epstein-related content or just content that makes people not feel crazy. Like, you know, if you're watching Trump at home and you're watching them cover up the Epstein files as an example, and you're like, what the fuck is going on here? Like, he's actively breaking law.

Is this, like, not crazy or other people not outrage? And then you go online and see that there are people like you. You're like, oh, I'm not crazy. This is just, like, the right thing to do. Yeah, it does also that we're not good on the left at hitting that part of the brain. that conspiratorial part of the brain, in part because I think we're not as,

whatever, craven or opportunistic and dishonest. But the Epstein files, some of the, and that Natalie Harbster are both stories where there's kind of like a secret that we're trying to uncover. And I think whenever we're talking about a secret that we're trying to uncover, we get to kind of play in like what the internet rewards,

which is people kind of being like, what's going on? There's somebody, they're not telling me something. There's something secret. In this case, you know, look, the harp story is right. Whatever the insinuation of a sexual relationship, the creepiest part, even if they are having sex, is not that they, is everything else. But regardless, like the Epstein story is a great example of, like, us being able to use the kind of paranoid style, the internet against them for once. Yeah, I mean, that's been their entire model.

Like, if you go to, oh, it drives me nuts. If you go to any of these right-wing YouTube channels, even still, but especially during the Biden years, for example, there was a new conspiracy every day that was just like, the craziest thing you've ever seen in your entire life. I saw people who I've debated with, like, genuinely, and I, you know, who knows if they actually believe it, but argue to me that, like, Joe Biden's a lizard or that he's like, you know, he's shedding his skin or that he died and he was replaced. And this, of course, with President Obama, same thing. You know, it's just, that's been their entire brand. And what's interesting is they're kind of, as you said, like getting a taste of their own medicine with the Epstein stuff or the Natalie Harp stuff. And I don't

think the Republicans really know how to respond. Like normally you respond with a fact check, but they don't, you know, they don't do that. Yeah. I would say that if, we did have the ability to replace Joe Biden, we probably would have done it earlier. You know, I think that, like, let's, you're saying that we can replace him. Why are we waiting till the, we're, like, you know, it's always better to plug in your phone at 30% when you think about it. So you're very online, but can even a politically engaged 24-year-old internet creature keep up with the overflowing Stregonona pasta pot of right-wing news? Also, do young people know about Streganona? Do I know about Streganona?

I was going to say, I don't know what the hell that is. What's streganona? That doesn't matter. We'll find out after. It's time for a game we're calling. News at or lose it. Here's how it works. I'm going to read some questions about the news. Okay.

Which of the following is not something that has been reported about Trump's adoring younger executive assistant Natalie Harp. A, she carries around a portable printer to print out news articles. B, she wrote in one letter to Trump, you are all that matters to me. C, she wears a locket containing strands of Trump's hair or D. When she didn't have a place to stay at Trump's Bedminster Golf Club in 2020, she allegedly spent the summer living in the women's locker room.

So I know the answer. I was actually, I was nervous for this because since I got to L.A. and I've been traveling, I've been tapped out a little bit. But I do know the answer to this one at C. Yeah, she did not. There's no locket. There's no locket with hair. On Saturday, Nikki Minaj posted, you have my vote.

Barbes, please support him however you can. Hashtag the good guys about who? It's in Florida. Byron Donald. Yeah, it was about. Iron Donald. I'm doing for governor in Florida. Wow.

Who won, by the way? I think he won. It's right now. Yeah. It's right now. It's like I have been right now. Oh, it's he won? Yeah.

Well, congras to him. Congress to him. The barbs. They showed up, I guess. Yeah, the barbs showed up. Next up, South Carolina, Congressman Nancy Mace showed off her tattoos on her new YouTube show. After telling Politico, she got nine tattoos because, quote, it was the pain that I needed to feel.

Oh, no. What is the name? Harry, what is the name of Nancy Mace's, YouTube show. I feel bad that I know the answer to this question. I'm going to be honest. I feel like, isn't it get-maced? It is, in fact, get-maced.

I'm impressed. I'm genuinely impressed. Oh, man, I need to go outside. No, you don't. You clearly cannot. This is why you need to just stay in your little fucking YouTube prison. My shoebox. You stay in the content minds and you don't come out until a Democrat is president.

Get back to the minds. You're not meant to be outside. Who has Ben Shapiro doing an impression of in this clip? He knows what he's saying is ridiculous. And he says, it's my right. Oh! No one said it's not your right. It just makes you a douchebag.

That one's pretty easy. That's Tucker Carlson. Yeah. The Boys are B thing. Again. Yeah, always. Well, yeah, yeah. Well, you know, the, um, it's interesting.

What do you make of the, like, sort of Ben Shapiro kind of slowly seeming as always kind of losing the right to the sort of Tucker Carlson thing? As an observer. As an observer, broadly on the beef, I love it. You know? It's like the quote, you never interrupt your enemy when they're making a mistake. And so all these Republicans, all they're doing right now is fighting. Like Ben Shapiro, like nine of the videos he posts a day are him making fun of like Tucker Carlson or Candace Owens.

And likewise with Tucker Carlson and Candace Owens are making fun of Ben Shapiro. You know, they don't really have anything else to say going into the midterms. They're like, you know, the economy sucks. Everything sucks right now. So if they want to keep doing this, I'm like happy to have them do it. You know, there was so much of that during the Biden years where I was fighting with people, and I hated it, and the Republicans were laughing at us. So I'm like, let them have their turn now.

Hey, remember when Trump put out an AI video of you being pooped on? You know what I do, actually? What do you think that was about? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know how somebody thinks of that. Well, he didn't. Someone made that for him, and you were getting pooped on by the president.

Like I said to somebody. You were personally, like, that is insane. Like, presidents have included John Adams. You know what I mean? It's like, this is the president of the United States. And forever, for history, there is a video where the president is dropping poop on your head. Like, when Gerald Ford tripped, I know about that, you know? Yeah.

That's an important part of history. There's never been that before in all the presidents. The president put out of video pooping on you. Oh, God, it's so gross. Like, it still, it's like, ugh. It bothers you? Like the sentence bothers me. You know what I mean?

Right, for sure. But him, the video didn't bother me. It was great for me. Like I, you know, I did a bunch of interviews and I was happy. But other than that, I mean, like, the fact that it is something that's going to be like alive throughout history is a little concerning to me. Like, am I going to tell like future wife, children, whatever? I'm like, yeah, so this happened. And how do I explain that?

How do I say that to somebody? I think there's going to be a cool. That's a cool thing to think about, you know, you're in your moon home and, and you're now, your teenager goes. on the old internet, which you can only access by putting out a fucking suit and going into a chamber because they know how dangerous it is. And they access the old internet. And they're like, oh, my God. But why was the president like this? The president is not a rational female robot. No, was this crazy old man and he pooped on me. No, I would like, you know, the first thing to come up before that is like, I don't know, like me interviewing or me doing a video with Obama.

Oh. that before that or like me, my interview with Joe Biden before that would be cool. But I'm nervous that that might be the first thing in the old internet you're describing. Yeah. It doesn't make me feel good. But like, again, it was fine. It turned out well. We'll be right back.

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Everybody wins. John's dog Leo loves Sundays, eats it all the time. I'm a huge fan of this kind of air-dried dog food. I think it just makes so much more sense than either the kibble, which is worse for them or the refrigerated stuff, which is like such a hassle. So this is like the perfect balance. Make the switch to Sundays. Go right now to Sundaysforogs.com slash love it and get 50% off your first order or you can use code love it at checkout. That's 50% off your first order at Sundaysfordogs.com slash love it. Sundaysfordogs.com slash love it or use the code love it at checkout. If you miss some of your favorite crooked pods this week, don't worry, you can now catch up on the week's best moments on MS now on Saturday nights.

MS now is streaming an episode of highlights from your favorite crooked pods, packing as much analysis, funny moments, and 100% correct opinions into 40 minutes as humanly possible. Crooked on MS now airs every Saturday at 9 p.m. Eastern, 6 p.m. Pacific. Please welcome back to the stage, Jimmy Simpson. Yeah, you're back. You guys got a greet. Thanks. Likewise. Oh, we're, I'm a fan of.

Fuck. Fuck. I'm giving cold shower now. I appreciate it. Now it's time for the rail wheel. Where the wheel lands, you have 60 seconds to rant on any topic at all. Every rant is important, and every rant is perfect. Let's begin.

I got it. Harry, what would you like to rant about? Okay, so, so, so, uh, So I've been traveling a lot. And on the way to L.A., and maybe I'm just weird about this, I don't know. But on the way to L.A., I saw a middle-aged man who was wearing, like, dad sneakers,

like take off his shoes and socks at the airport. And, like, that disturbed. I'm, like, very anti-feet. So that disturbed me from just my vision. But then he proceeded to put the foot on the chair that's, like, sitting, you know, in front of the place where you board. He was, like, putting his feet all over the chair. And I was, like, I had to leave.

I had to leave. I couldn't look at the feet because it was just really gross. So I feel like, and look, there's some exceptions. If you're wearing a sockless shoe, perhaps there's an argument to be made. But if you're wearing socks and shoes at the airport,

you've got to keep them on. You can't take the shoes off. You can't be barefoot in the airport. You've got to have the shoes on. That's something that bother me, and I haven't said it publicly. I've been wanting to. So I'm using this as like a position to say it.

I'm so glad you did. Thank you. Yeah, I think that once you're, I think it is very rare that it is a good idea to take socks off that you will have to immediately put back on. There are exceptions, like if you're taking the socks off for a long, like you're at the beach or something,

you're taking them off, and eventually you have to put them back on. But a sock, like, sort of in the midst of a journey, it's doing a lot of work quietly. You know, it's a quiet, silent work that it does. But once you've exposed it to the world, what it's been doing for you, it becomes loud.

You know what I'm saying? You're aware of all that it's sacrificed, everything it's been through for you up until that point, which you haven't really had to think about, and then now you're aware of it. And so I think you're making a really important point about not taking your socks off at the airport. Thank you.

Thank you for expressing what we all feel. I appreciate that. Let's spin it again. Jimmy's on you. What would you like to rant about? Well, I don't rant so I could share a gentle concern. And it's about how much people rant these days. You know, I think sometimes a bad sandwich.

is just a bad sandwich, not an assault on lunch. And we have a brilliant former Obama speechwriter who has moved from hope and change to grievance distribution. You know, maybe the CVS self-checkout line doesn't make me enrage. Maybe I find it actually relatively convenient. And like I said, I don't really rant.

I meet things as they are. I try to release control. I try to meet the universe with curiosity. And yes, sometimes people do hit reply all unnecessarily, and they should be in prison. But I don't make my whole identity. But now I'm ranting. So, God damn it, you won.

You won, John. That was great. Really got my number. Here's the thing about the self-checkout. At the supermarket, it specifically, if I'm holding a vegetable that has no label or nothing on it, if I'm holding a vegetable and I know that I'm going to go to that, like, going to that self-chat, it's training. I have to train. I go to that thing. It's like, what? I got to weigh it. I got to figure out

all the thing. Like, I know, and then I see people with huge things, they don't even have tons of individual vegetables. I'm like, I got to watch you learn how to punch in all these fucking numbers, what the code is for the onion, whether it's to work. organic or not, and it is organic, but are you paying for the organic? Oh, shit. Let's spin it again. I have a little rant, really more of a, you know, just an observation. Not going to lose my cool about it or anything.

So this is a story that just broke today. So a company called Median Strategies put out a poll that said Karen Bass was up by 12 points. Then Noah Goldberg and L.A. Times reporter reached out over and over again until that polling company admitted that it was fake, that the numbers were all made up, as was a poll they released about the Wisconsin race that said Francesca Hong was up by 20 points, because they called it, quote, a social experiment to see if people on the internet would share false information. You're experimenting on that? What's your next experiment? To see if releasing bees in a hospital is bad? It's bad. So Karen Bass posted the poll saying, like, the momentum.

is with us, and I obviously am not, I like Nithia, but I was like, that sucks. That whole company basically treated her like Carrie and Carrie and convinced her that there was this good thing happening and in fact it was blood in a fucking bucket. Which was unfair. And I would just say also, don't share things you like on the internet just because you like them and you have no idea where they fucking came from. Like everybody was shared. It's crazy what's happening out there. We'll be right back. And we're back. Now, look, I don't think this show could have gone any better.

But we're going to find out why I might be wrong. In a segment, we call second thoughts. My producers have written down a list of things they wish I had not said or done tonight, which is always longer than I wanted to be. And Jimmy, Harry, if you have any second thoughts or things you'd like to revisit from tonight, we're welcome to share them as well. You don't need to, but it's nice to think about things you might have said or done differently just to kind of be growing and changing and at all times.

I shouldn't have added to the misery of the USS Lincoln sailors by reminding them that they're also not going to get to see the Odyssey in 70 millimeter. The next one is simply, you know what you did. And it says, here, the union is good. And I agree. Jimmy, I immediately told Jimmy that his famous Ledman character didn't work. I enjoyed that. I love some constructive, well, some destructive criticism, I guess. It's not constructive feat because it's like,

where there's no room for it. It's already over. I can't fix it. And you just pointed out it wasn't, it was awful. Well, no, that's, I didn't say it was,

I think that it was, I'm glad it kept, I should, you know what, I'm glad this was a second thought. It is so funny and good. What I mean by not work is only that it was strange, and it took the audience a beat

to catch up to why it was good, which is why they were smart enough to keep doing it, even though when you were first out there, the crowd is clearly like, who the fuck is this guy? And but by the end, it was like you were like, like,

like Kramer entering on Seinfeld by the end. They were like, it's Lyle the fucking enter. My brother called me the poor man's Chris Elliott, and I found that there's nothing but a compliment. Wow. Jimmy described a beautiful ayahuasca experience, and I said, oh no. You're being your authentic self,

and I really respect that. I brought up Walking Dead, but then just said my zombie theory and did not ask a question. I'm sorry I squeezed his painful shoulder. That's one regret I have. But maybe the pain will kind of... How are you feeling?

make a memory. I'm feeling good. Okay. I feel like, I feel it was fine. There's a white handprint on his pink shoulder. Yeah. You were forthcoming and vulnerable about your sunburn,

but I did scold you about sunscreen anyway. No, that's like the right move, though. Yeah. I need to do it. I know. Anyway. And then this is, I think I know who wrote this, that I should really wear a sunscreen every day,

especially if I'm using a retinal, exclamation point, exclamation point. I know I should. I know I should. I have, I convinced myself, well, I'm not going to be outside during, you know, the sun's business hours, which is like, you know, like 1030 to

230, that's when the sun gets most of its work done, you know? And that's when I was out. I follow those rules too, but it's going the whole time, they say. Yeah, it is going the whole time. Apparently, allegedly. Yeah, you are on the other hand, I'm just going to just go out there. You raw dogged a huge gaseous ball of flames.

Yeah. The sentence I never thought I'd hear. Yeah. I told Harry to, quote, get back to the mines. You know, nobody's ever said that to me. Really? Nobody's ever said...

So I actually appreciate it. It was unique. Yeah. Yeah, you just got to get back to the mines. That's where you belong. I have a shoebox apartment in New York. It's very small.

This tan, this tan has taught you nothing. It's like, you're not meant to be outside. You're meant to be in front of a camera, walking people through in a kind of mild-mannered way. What is happening with the Trump administration until either he loses or the sun literally dies. Yeah.

It's like an okay future. It's fine. And that's our show. Thank you so much to Jimmy Simpson and Harry Sisson. There are 76 days until the midterms. We'll be back Friday with Amy Rossum and Chris Olson. Have a great night. Love and Relief.

It is a Cicket Media production. Our show is produced by Kendra James, Bill McGrath, Kelsey Gante, and me, John Lovett. Our production team includes Hallie Keeper, Sarah Lazarus, Roman Borsolino, Peter Miller, David Tolls, Claudia Shang, Jay Banks, Gavin Purcell, and Matt DeGrope. And our staff is proudly unionized with the Writers Guild of America East. If you miss some of your favorite crooked pods this week, don't worry, you can now catch up on the week's best moments on MS Now on Saturday nights. MS Now is streaming an episode of highlights from your favorite crooked pods, packing as much analysis, funny moments, and 100% correct opinions into 40 minutes as humanly possible.

Crooked on MS Now airs every Saturday at 9 p.m. Eastern, 6 p.m. Pacific.