Lovett or Leave It - Injustice League

Episode Date: November 18, 2017

Van Jones, Cristela Alonzo, and Langston Kerman join Jon to break down the week’s news. Al Franken faces an allegation. Kushner and Sessions once again struggle with human memory. The GOP tax plan moves through Congress. And the Flash can be gay. Maybe. Hopefully?

What is up? Hi everybody. Thanks for coming out to the improv. I see a friend of the pod. How's everybody doing? Before we get started, we have a lot to get to. We have a fantastic panel. But there is an issue on my mind, and it is Justice League.

So before we get started, I do think it's important that we have a debate about the film Justice League. It is a debate that I will be conducting alone. So here's the thing. Justice League is good. The movie is good. And I saw all of those reviews panning Justice League and then I go and see Justice League and it was good. Suicide Squad,

one of the worst things that's ever happened on film. Batman versus Superman. How does that happen? How do people say, this is good, we're finished. This work of art is done. Wonder Woman.

Good. We liked Wonder Woman. That was a relief. And then I go and see Justice League, expecting it to be terrible because all the critics have panned it, and then I have a great time. Some evidence.

Gal Gadot. Good. Ezra Miller, funny, queer, and good. Joss Whedon, huge net positive. Lots of jokes. Henry Cav, also shirtless. And yes, the villain looked like bad CGI from an episode of Sliders or something. So that was bad. And sure, the whole movie does revolve around three cubes. And at one point, the good guys give the bad guys the cube so that they can fight about it later and it does look terrible like i don't know why every zack snyder movie has to end with a giant monochromatic battle that doesn't seem like it is anywhere just you know it's serious because the asphalt is breaking right aquaman does not talk to any fish not a grouper not a dolphin

and also, really, this is the story about a group of people who realize that they're useless without Superman and it's the the DZ universe is the story of people dealing with the fact that one of their characters is just deeply overpowered. And the writing is very bad. In short, Justice League is garbage.

It is a terrible movie. End of debate. That Henry Cavill, though. And that Ezra Miller. I'm going to see that Flash movie. I hope they let him be a gay character. I know someone's going to tell me that the Flash is not gay in the comic books, but I don't care. Can't The Flash be gay? Is anyone a Flash fan?

Ezra Miller? He's not playing it down. I don't know anything about Ezra Miller, but I got a vibe off the character. Huge fan of that guy. It's Friday and the news sucks. I'm really stalling because the news sucks. It's like we come here once a week and it's like, let's all get together and deal with a reckoning about sexual harassment a century in the making. That's what we're going to do. A thousand years in the making, 10,000 years in the making. That's what we do here now. A year ago, if you said,

what are you going to do every Friday? I'd say, I'm going to talk about Donald Trump and sexual harassment. Very surprising. I would have not believed it. But here we are. A couple things, guys, before I bring out our panel. Crooked has launched a new podcast

with Jason Kander. It's called Majority 54. It's about the 54 percent of us who didn't vote for Donald Trump and how we talk about the issues to the rest of us who did. And it's great. His first episode is about race and policing. It's a fascinating conversation. And you should check that out. Crooked Conversations. I don't know if you've been following this, but Tommy Vitor has been plugging Jane Mayer's book for like a year and a half. He finally got to meet her. He did die. But before that, it was a good conversation. Also coming soon, Girls Just Want to Have Pod with Erin Gloria Ryan and Keep It with Ira Madison. Lots more on crooked.com. And, guys, new merch. There's a War on Christmas starter pack. There's a lot of good stuff. That's real. Yes, there's an ornament.

Pundit on one side, Leo on the other. That's cool, right? That's weird that people love that stuff now. I don't know what to do about that. Nothing to do. Just accept it. Let's bring out our panel, guys.

It's going to be a great show. He is a comedian, writer, and actor from Comedy Central and HBO. Please welcome Langston Kerman. Hey, Langston. Hi. Thank you. She's a comedian with a special on Netflix called Lower Classy and was the first Latina to create, produce, and star in a network TV sitcom.

Please welcome Cristela Alonso. How are you? What's up everybody? I'm good. How are you? How is everybody? We're good I think. I haven't seen Justice League and now I don't know if I want to or not.

But it's nuanced. But hearing you talk, I want to go and read your Yelp reviews. You have really good reviews on random stuff. They're a journey. I write them under a pseudonym. Good luck. He's a social entrepreneur, CNN political contributor, and the author of Beyond the Messy Truth. Please welcome Van Jones.

Hi, Van. Hello. Why do I feel so underdressed next to Van Jones? Why do I feel like you're a football coach giving me a pep talk about how I can reach my dreams? It's possible. Anything.

Girl, you can get that scholarship. Go! Look, is Van wearing a blazer? Yes. But am I wearing pants I bought on Amazon for $12? Yes. Let's get into it. What a week.

I don't want applause. I want a fucking bell. Some people yelling, keep it in. All right. All right, let's get into it. This week, we've been dealing with the aftermath of the allegations against Roy Moore and the ongoing national, international reckoning around sexual misconduct, sexual harassment, sexual assault. There was a report this week that Senator Al Franken, he was accused of harassment.

Radio host Leanne Tweeden reported that in 2006 when Franken was doing a comedy USO tour, he forcibly kissed her during rehearsals. She shared a photo of Franken reaching for her, apparently her breasts, while she appeared to be asleep. He apologized to her, called for a formal ethics investigation into his conduct. We've been having this conversation about all kinds of figures across industries, across parties, from Kevin Spacey to Weinstein to Louis C.K. to Roy Moore to Roger Ailes to Bill O'Reilly and on and on and on. This was a revelation about a popular,

prominent Democratic senator, popular amongst many of the people leading this conversation about the importance of taking these allegations seriously, making sure people are held accountable. Christelle, what did you make of this report about Al Franken? And what was your reaction? And what do you think the repercussions should be? You know, what I thought was interesting is that it's a very serious problem, but if you go on social media, you actually, I felt like it's one of those issues that's actually separated into parties. So it actually does become a Democrat versus Republican issue because that depends on how they're going to react to everything. You know, it's like Trump, you know, commenting about Al Franken,

you know, he goes and tweets about it, and I just keep thinking, oh, my God, I can't wait to see what he says about Roy Moore. You know what I mean? Which is going to be nothing. And I understand. It's so weird how this is such a serious problem, and so many people on Twitter get upset, and they want everybody's heads.

But it's weird how people react when it's one of their own. And I think that that puts party before anything else. And that's actually what causes a bigger rift for everybody. Because then we're not saying right or wrong. We're saying Democrat and Republican. And how do we fix a problem where we can't even admit that everybody is at fault when they're getting accused? Yeah, I mean, that's I think one thing that this makes clear. That this isn't a partisan

issue at all. It runs from Hollywood to the chair Tucker Carlson currently sits in. It runs from Alabama to Minnesota. It's across industries. It has to do with power. It has to do with men taking advantage of that power. I mean, Van, what did you think about how this played out, the partisan angle? What was your reaction? Well, I do think that there's a lot of partisanship. However, I do think there is a difference between what Al Franken's accused of and what Roy Moore is accused of. And, I mean, it's kind of like a difference between, like, a mugger and Jeffrey Dahmer. I mean, it's like there's, like, a real big difference. There's a real big difference.

And I also think that it does matter if somebody fesses up and if somebody tries to apologize versus somebody who's now getting a handwriting expert to prove that he didn't sign a yearbook. I'm like, dude, you're reaching. You're reaching. Dude got banned from a mall. I mean, how bad do you have to be when you can't be near a Brookstone? My boy Rory Moore is not going down. It's kind of tight.

I mean, y'all don't have to like it, but he's for real not going to give up. That's really impressive. Anything is possible. Right. It's impressive. The amount of shit he wrote in a child's year book and not have

a good summer. Like he wrote he wrote he wrote real shit calling her beautiful. Yeah, he was like, you sexy as hell dog. And then he called her at the office. Yeah. And then he's like I'm intrigued. He's like, and then

then Hannity asked him about it. And he was like, I mean, if it happened, I'm not going to deny it. But I don't think I don't remember you know what I mean like I signed so many yearbooks it's a burn my hobbies I'm very popular

signing yearbooks is just what I do I was most popular at school what do you want from me I was most likely to sign yearbooks in high school I'm sorry he's not going anywhere and it's impressive Al Franken cave. What a coward. Can I just say, was it weird?

I don't know. For me, it was actually it was a breath of fresh air to have a statement where he admitted that he did it so quick. And that's weird. Isn't it weird to be at that time that when someone comes out and says they did it, I actually I'm surprised at the speed of it

and the actual admission. Like, that's what I think is interesting. Yeah, it took him two statements, but fine. The sequel. I mean, the sequel. Look, I'll be honest in that. This one really, like, it was a gut punch. And it's not surprising to find out that a person,

you know, Al Franken's a stranger to me, right? He's a public figure who I looked up to because of the books he wrote, because of the way he went from comedy into politics. I like the way that he conducted himself as a senator. I like the way that he interrogates people. I like the way he fights for things I care fair. But it was a gut punch because he's somebody that I looked up to. And I found myself wondering, what is the right thing? Is it the right thing to call for his resignation? And I'll just be honest in saying I wasn't sure. And then I found myself asking, what would I say if this were a Republican? If this were Jeff Flake or Ben Sasse? The best they've got. Sincerely, that is what I was thinking. or Jeff Flake or Ben Sasse, you know, the best they've got, you know?

Sincerely, like that is what I was thinking. And I found myself thinking I'd probably call for them to resign. No, but I'm being honest. I think I would say they should go. That they should go because it's not just the photo. It's not just the story. It's that we should hold senators to a higher standard. We're dealing with something hard and i think i think the challenge is what do you do when people do something that's wrong and right now we have a light switch approach either

total forgiveness or a lights out and i i mean i do a lot of work in prisons with people who've done stuff that's really, really tough. And I try to have more of a dimmer switch approach. Like you want to be able to figure out not a one-size-fits-all response to each and every person. response to each and every person. And I think that's, it shows you how new it is for us to even take this stuff seriously, that literally we only have two responses, which is either throw them into the piranha pit or say it didn't happen. And so at some point, we're going to hopefully develop a little bit more of an intelligent approach to this stuff. Well, but see, here's the point is, what I was trying to say is that the situation with Franken is actually a little different because the victim accepted his apology. And that's something that's actually very important to talk about because in the other cases,

you know, going up to 45, the women that came out haven't been, haven't gotten the apology and they don't have closure and they don't get to move on. They don't have their final chapter. They don't have anything. All they are is a number, because most of us can't remember their names anyway. You know, so that, like when we say, you know, that someone's guilty or someone's not, what happens in this case when he apologizes

and she accepts the apology? Because I'll tell you, as a woman of color in stand-up, there's not many of us out there, and I've experienced stuff like that. I've been in situations like that, and let me tell you, an apology, that is powerful. That is something that those women need, aren't getting, and after that, in this situation, situation when somebody says i accept your apology then that's when we this is the difficult part is now with the apology how do we move forward because the victim the one affected she accepted the apology so how are we going to be tougher on someone when the victim herself said i accept your apology so i think that's an interesting point because we haven't

had this happen in any other situation that's come up. What do you think? I mean, you know, there's in the space between nothing and resignation, right? In the space between pretending it didn't happen or ignoring it as we did so long and go away. We don't want to hear from you. You're not part of public life anymore. What are the consequences? What is a way that somebody in your mind could show remorse, could do good out of this? You know, I think that actually showing that you're genuine in your apology and, you know, for lack of a better phrase, being a genuine ally in the movement and actually showing remorse and showing that you really meant what you said, I think goes a long way.

And really, I know it seems simple, but it's one of the first steps you can do because how do you move forward? How do people accept what you're saying if you can't even take that first step to show that you're genuinely remorseful? I'm so sick and tired of people getting caught doing bad things and then apologizing for it.

And then it just seems like we all forget it's just like it's a form letter and i'm tired of these form letter apologies where people just say oh you know i'm sorry i did that it's like no you sorry you got caught and have to apologize for this shit and i'm sick and tired of that you have to apologize genuinely you have to be sincere and you have to actually make you have to show that you're apologetic in that specific situation whatever it is i i to that i i think what's difficult about right now is that we're not in a place where we accept remorse if if it exists i don't know that like i don't know that louis was actually sorry i don't know that al franken was actually sorry I don't know that Al Franken was actually sorry but if they were the immediate response is that's not good enough and so I think the challenge is that like we're in a place where

like this literally six months of women finally getting their like chance at like uh the right thing being solved right or an attempt to even be heard for the right thing so it's like oh well no you don't get to apologize and you're fine we we still want more out of this so I I feel I guess to that point I feel equally confused in that like I I hear things being said that sound like remorse and then I hear another side being like nah that's not enough and a part of me in my own male ignorance is like well what the fuck else do i do it's like i don't know it's like being on probation in life yeah but also maybe i should be because i'm a monster well exactly you totally should be so i don't i don't know the solution but i do know that like legitimately those dudes could be remorseful,

and we are not allowing them the space to be that way. And maybe they shouldn't be allowed that space. And that's the challenge I think we're all bumping up against. Look, I think if we battle Freddy Krueger and we beat him, I'm not going to share a bedroom with him. I mean, I don't trust him. But what if he's sexy, Freddy Krueger? Like The Flash? I'm not going to share a bedroom with him. I mean, you know, I mean, I don't trust him. But, you know, I mean. But what if he's sexy, Freddy Krueger?

Like the Flash? Like Blake Shelton sexy. Like Blake Shelton sexy, you said. Nobody's Blake Shelton sexy. That's as sexy as it gets. You are so accurate in saying that. No one is Blake Shelton sexy. It's very particular. It's like

the cilantro thing. Some of us have it. Some of us finger bang to Blake Shelton. Blake Shelton is the cilantro of sexy men. I don't think we can do anything but leave it there. When we come back, a segment called The Russia Stuff.

Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. Van, we're in the break, but I can still put this in the show, so just flagging that. Do you think Superman is overpowered? I know this is a question. I'm asking you for a reason because I know that you care about this. You know, I think that Superman is important because there's – I'm serious, man. I'm serious.

You asked. You asked. You asked. I want to know. I don't think he's overpowered. They always can throw some kryptonite in there if they need to. But the reality is that the buck has to stop somewhere, and it ain't going to be Aquaman. Okay? It's just not.

It's just not. If the world is destroyed, Martians aren't going to be saying, damn it, Aquaman, where were you? Like, there's got to be something he's the dude. Aquaman reminds me of that show in the 90s where they tried to make Knight Rider, but it was a boat. And it almost worked,

except the criminals had this one thing that they could do, which was drive away from the beach. Fly in the system. That's the problem with Aquaman, you know? It's like, there's not enough aquariums, you know? Yeah, you gotta go to the beach to battle him. You gotta go to the beach.

That's the problem. And we're back! Now for a segment we call The Russia Stuff. Here's how it works. This Russia nonsense is ongoing, but as a matter of principle, we know that we don't have a lot of effect on it. And while it's interesting and a bit like candy and one of the craziest things that's ever happened to the republic,

we also should be talking about tax reform and health care and all the things where we really can make a difference. And so we're going to spend two minutes, and only two minutes, on The Russia Stuff and the latest developments this week, because there were several. Let's start the clock. Earlier this week, The Atlantic reported that WikiLeaks slid into Donald Trump Jr.'s DMs on Twitter during the campaign, proving that Donald Trump Jr. is, at best, a moron.

The House Intelligence Committee is weighing whether to subpoena Twitter over the messages. Jared Kushner received and forwarded emails about WikiLeaks and received a, quote, Russian backdoor overture and dinner invite, end quote, that he kept from the Senate Judiciary Committee investigators. The committee is now requesting those missing documents, transcripts of Kushner's testimony to date, and all documents related to Kushner's security clearance. They said the deadline to produce the documents is November 27th. Up until this week, Attorney General Jeff Sessions, who does not have a memory,

does not retain information, could not recall any relationship between the Trump campaign and Russia. On Tuesday, before the House Judiciary Committee, Sessions revised his account of what he knew, revealing for the first time that he indeed recalled a meeting in which a campaign advisor talked about having contacts who could possibly arrange a meeting between then-candidate Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin. Sessions then decided to open a speech at the Mayflower Hotel in Washington, D.C. today with a joke about his tendency to forget meetings with agents of the Kremlin. Quote, I was just thinking, I want to ask you, is Ambassador Kislyak in the room before I get started? And in Russians, I'm not doing an accent. Ha, ha, ha. All right. Good one.

Good one. The Russians interfered with our election. Hilarious. Trump had the meeting with Putin during his 11-day trip in Asia. Trump said he took Putin at his word that Russia didn't interfere in the election despite reports for our intelligence agencies. Trump said of Putin, he said he didn't meddle. He said he didn't meddle. Every time he sees me, he he said he didn't meddle. He said he didn't meddle. Every time he sees me,

he says, I didn't do that. And I believe, I really believe that when he tells me that, he means it. Van, do you think Putin means it? No. I think that...

I think that Putin thinks about Trump the way that Vintroglitz thinks about a puppet. He's just sort of... Yeah. And that's the Russia stuff. Cliffhanger.

Cliffhanger. And now for a segment we call OK Stop. Yeah. All right. Now there are superfluous bells. Here's how OK Stop works.

We play a clip, and as it goes, when it bothers us, when we have something to say, we say, OK, stop. And then we talk about it. An FBI report leaked this October warns of an emergent domestic terror threat imperiling the lives of police officers. The report is entitled Black Identity Extremists, a term meant to denote activists like those who belong to the black lives matter movement a term that is made up at a house judiciary committee hearing on tuesday congresswoman karen bass asked attorney general and known who wrote this card attorney general and known racist jeff sessions about this report that's bias.

That's a little bias. I want to see that credit on his LinkedIn. Supervisor at racism. Previously at racism. Let's roll the clip. Do you believe that there is a movement of African Americans that identify themselves as black identity extremists? And what does that movement do well I'd be interesting to see the conclusions of that report but

I'm aware that there are groups that do have an extraordinary commitment to their racial identity and some transform themselves even into violent activists. Are you aware of white organizations that do this as well? Okay, stop. Bars! Bars! Bars! Now, before we get to what's next here,

a congressperson has just asked the Attorney General of the United States, are you aware of any organizations in the United States that have white identity extremism? Now, I've taken some easy tests and some hard tests in my life. I've taken tests of the DMV. I've taken the AP Spanish exam. They've run the gamut. That is an easy question. Let's see how he did. Yes.

Not coming to you? Certainly a group such as the Ku Klux Klan. I just want to say, they didn't come to mind. He couldn't think of one. She reminded him of the Klan. Let's continue. They had movements, but there's a racial identity white movements that have been identified for sure. Has the FBI done a report on white identity extremists that are likely motivated to target law enforcement officers? I'm not aware of that. Okay, stop. Oh, no, it was a second ago, but there's a woman in the back

who is really hoping he gets it right. Just the whole time. Just rooting for him the whole time. Like, come on, Jeffy, baby. You got it? Phone a friend. She knows that she's watching her boss and she's like, if he does okay,

maybe I leave at six. He fucks this up. I'm eating dinner at my desk. It just looks like one of those moms that's like dancing along while the little girl. Yeah. Man, I would watch a show called Dance Moms

about the stage mom for Jeff Sessions. I'd watch it once. Sessions, Sessions, let's do it. What is the department going to do to protect the rights of average citizens to protest if they have a concern about police officers? This department will not unlawfully target people. And so I would like to know what will you do to essentially roll back what is listed

in this report? Because it's not accurate. Okay, stop. She was playing it real like cool and lawyerly, right? All the way to the end, and then she was like, because it's not accurate. Because you dumb as hell, dog. We will look at the report.

I actually would be interested in reading it. He hasn't read the report. Jeff Sessions, he has this look that he gets on his face during congressional testimony, this kind of, this sort of like, it's like deer in headlights, but a deer that knows it did something wrong. It's hard to explain. It's like both, it's both malicious and dumb, you know?

I think he looks like the oldest field mouse ever just the oldest one yeah he definitely tells the story about making cinderella's dress but that was a long time ago van Van Can the Flash be gay? I think that in fact he's always been gay Wow Think about it I don't know, I am

I'm thinking about it really hard I don't have anything else I don't know. I am. I'm thinking about it really hard. I don't have anything else. I don't know anything about The Flash. Who has The Flash ever had a love interest with? Who? Yeah. Iris. And you fall for that beard?

Come on, man. I'm sorry. I would like to know. What's her name? Iris what? Oh, Iris. What's his last name? West.

West. You know what? It doesn't matter. He's gay now. It's 2017. The Flash is 100% gay. And there's one moment in the movie where he falls on Wonder Woman, and that's apparently still a joke, where he fell on Wonder Woman.

Isn't that funny? There's a sexual thing happening. But I still think he can be gay. I don't know a lot about gay politics, but I don't think that you're supposed to tell everybody. Oh! He's outing the Flash! He's outing it!

I think that's... I think that's his job. I want to say something. Which is... Look, you know. Oh, here we go. I apologize to the flag. It's my podcast now. Things are going to change around here.

No more bells. We're done with the bell. I've embarrassed myself. I've lost control. I've outed the flash. He won't text me back. And I know he sees it. I saw the little type bubble.

And it's like, he's not a slow typer. He's the flash. I saw the little type bubble, and it's like, he's not a slow typer. He's the Flash. When we come back, a new game. That's it. It's a new game. It's great. Don't go anywhere.

This is Love It or Leave It, and there's more on the way. Van. What? Why do you keep talking? Are they lesbians in the Wonder Woman Island? The entire island. Yes. They are. The entire island.

By definition. That's cool. It just was not clear. I didn't understand. Themyscira. All lesbians. All right. And we're back.

Now for a segment called, this isn't a tax bill, it's a fucking heist. Here's how it works. We're going to quiz you about elements of the Republican tax proposal currently making its way through Congress. Would somebody out there like to play the game? I had the two best arguments so far. making its way through Congress. Would somebody out there like to play the game? It's my birthday!

I had the two best arguments so far. This guy and it's my birthday. Hi, what's your name? Hi, my name's Lindsay. Lindsay, hi, how are you? Hi. Where are you from? I'm from Texas originally, but I live in Culver City. Okay.

Yeah. All right. Here's how it works. I'm going to read you some element of this tax plan, and then we're going to read you clues as to what is going to pay for that element of the tax plan. Okay? And it will be your job to suss out the correct answer.

Okay. All right? Got it. And, Lindsay. Yes. It's very hard. Yes. Are you guys ready?

Joe Ricketts just shut down DNA Info, the Gothamist, and its sister sites, including LAist, DCist, Chicagoist, and SFist, after employees tried to unionize. With the estate tax cut and repeal in the bill, he personally would stand to gain $835 million for his estate, for his heirs.

How are we paying for it? A, by sending Donald Trump Jr. to the Serengeti to gather as many elephant tests as he can by any means necessary. Oh, that's sad. as relevant as he can by any means necessary. Aw, that's sad. By taxing tweets, which would save American society.

Or by making 145,000 graduate students, 60% in science and math and engineering, pay at least $10,000 more annually, thanks to the appeal of a provision that prevents grad students from being taxed on tuition waivers. So, Lindsay, the question is to you. Are we paying to help the heirs of the Ricketts fortune by selling tusks, taxing tweets,

or making grad students who are making $30,000 pay taxes as if their income is $80,000. Oh, man. It's grad students. Yeah. Lindsay, you are one for one. And I believe you're beginning to pick up on the theme of this game. Next question. Okay.

Currently, 840,000 teachers are able to deduct the cost of supplies they. Next question. Okay. Currently, 840,000 teachers are able to deduct the cost of supplies they buy for their own classrooms. This allows teachers to spend $250 on markers and crayons. Sadly, this tax cut costs $2.1 billion over 10 years, and so it must go. What does this bill do with the money from teachers,

the $250 of a tax expense for crayons and markers? A. It burns it in a fire as a message to kids who like school. B. By his giant gold letters, it spell out the word street smarts. Go with your monologue. Or C, puts it toward the estate tax cut of one family, the DeVos family.

Yes, $2 billion from teachers to go to the family of the DeVos family, yes, $2 billion from teachers to go to the family of the Secretary of Education. Ugh. Yeah. Isn't that fucking shocking? Can you believe that? Lindsay, we need your answer. It's C, the DeVos family.

It is. It turns out it is C. That's right. To pay for the estate tax repeal, the House bill makes it so teachers, you know those teachers, sitting on their money. Making so much money.

Sitting in their castles, deducting $250 for notebook paper and thumbtacks. It's gotta stop. It's not okay. Did Lindsay answer or did we just pretend she did? No, I did. She did.

She got it. Was there a bell? You forgot the bell? Guys, I'm sorry. Nice memory there. Oh! Not so nervous anymore are you Lindsay next question for Lindsay who we do not care for Sheldon

Sheldon and Miriam Adelson the Republican mega donors would personally see a 14.6 billion dollar increase in the inheritance for their heirs. One family. 14.6 billion. It's expensive, but don't worry. We can afford it. How do we pay for it? A. By putting orphans to work and taxing their coal output. By putting orphans to work and taxing their coal output.

B, by making nun the medical expense tax break, which helps chronically ill Americans with huge out-of-pocket medical expenses pay for treatment, surgery, and long-term care. Lindsay, this was a hard one. However, we are waiting, and we're still waiting for an answer. Yeah, that's a tough one.

I think I'm going with C. You're right. It turns out that we can... I mean, that makes logical sense. It's the right thing to do. We'll raise about $10 billion per year. Lindsay. Yes.

You know, we started as friends. We leave it as enemies. Oh, that makes me sad. I want to be your friend. Okay, we're back. Okay, thanks. Final question. Donald Trump owns a Boeing 757 jet.

Republicans want to give private jet owners a tax break. It will cost $50 million. Not a lot of money, but in the grand scheme of things, budget-wise, but we're going to give them $50 million. Where do we get that $50 million in the Republican tax plan? Langston, kick us off. A, we'll take cash out of the pocket of disabled Americans whose conditions make them unable to work. B, yeah, that's real.

C, this is the world we live in. Yeah. see this is the world we live in yeah uh yes uh this is the elderly and disabled tax credit if you're 65 and older and have a disability and your income is low enough uh you may until this is repealed be eligible for that tax break 50 million dollars for trump's plane where's it coming from all of the above yes it is it's all of the above give it up for Lindsay Lindsay against all odds with an attitude that many people found

grating I'm just kidding Lindsay I'm just kidding guys Lindsay has won the game she gets the parachute gift card please a round of applause for Lindsay and for our panel for helping us Just kidding. Guys, Lindsay has won the game. She gets the parachute gift card. Please, a round of applause for Lindsay and for our panel for helping us play the game. Oh, and happy birthday to Lindsay. I want to thank...

Who said that? Who reminded me? What's your name? I'm Shoobs. Shoobs? Yeah. I don't know. Shoobz, it's cool.

Is that a nickname or is it just... It's a nickname. My name's too hard for you to spell. I don't have to spell it. So I felt that Shoobz... Now that I know you, I get it. I get why you're a Shoobz. But Shoobz, I want to thank you

for knowing me well enough from having listened to remind me to wish Lindsay a happy birthday. Because it is, you know, it's the little touches that I do often miss. Good, thanks, Shubes. Ben, Aquaman can talk to fish. Why do you keep doing this? This is not working. It's working for me.

It's working for me. I feel great. Can I ask a question? Do you break up with the audience every week and then make up with them? It's love-hate. No, it's all love. We get along,

but sometimes you do have to muscle them a little bit, remind them who's boss. Sure. And see, when I'm in charge, you guys, you'll get to do what you want. Langston! Langston! Langston! Langston! Bring back the hissing! Come on!

40 minutes of hissing. I don't know what it means, but I like it! You know what? Langston come in. He's new. He's fresh. You think you like him, you'll miss me when I'm gone. We don't know about his bugaboos yet. I don't read a lot. And it's usually very specific reading. I read a lot of Steph Curry news.

It's going to turn into a weirdly sports-specific podcast about a petite light-skinned man who I like. I like him too, but it's different. All right, when we come back. When we come back, the rant will. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back.

Now for a segment called the rant wheel. Here's how it works. We spin the wheel where it lands. We rant about the topic, whatever it may be. This week on the wheel, we have the Mike Pence rule about not being in the same room with Mike Pence. We have elephant poaching, which has been in the news. We have Christian Bale gaining and losing weight again and again.

We have Louise Linton and Stephen Mnookin at the Mint taking pictures. We have the miscarriage of justice affecting Meek Mill. We have the opioid withdrawal earpiece. We have Blake Shelton, People's Sexiest Man Alive, and late-breaking development, Justin Bieber won a Latin Grammy. Why?

Have you not heard Despacito? Let's spin the wheel. You know, right before we came out, actually, it seems as though the outcry against the Trump administration announcing that they were going to allow the import importing elephant trophies back into the United States. They suspended it to review it again, which it's so. So that's good news. It's really shocking when the Trump administration responds to normal politics. It's always mysterious as to when it's going to happen. Now, obviously, there have been these photos of uh the trump kids with their

elephant trophies and i'm glad they suspended this now they make this argument that oh it's a conservation method by making people want to go hunt and kill elephants you make the elephants valuable to the places where they are creates the ability for them to conserve. But man, what a lack of human imagination that the only way we can save these creatures, these creatures that live in families, that speak and mourn and remember, is to kill a few of them to make room for the rest. It is absurd.

And it's great that they suspended the rule. It is absolutely alarming that this has become a legitimate argument as to a way to save these creatures that it is morally reprehensible to kill and uh that's all i have to say about that i don't know if anybody has anything to add can i do the idea that that's a priority if you could give me a list of 50 000 things to fix why elephants why because the only agenda that Trump has is to wake up in the morning and ask, what did Obama do?

Not that. So I don't think there's actually any thought process. Obama tried to protect them so he says, fine, kill Dumbo. What? People don't like that? Okay, never mind. So that's where we are. Pausing it is fascinating. Let's spin it again it has landed on meek mill van i know this was a topic on your mind um so meek mill

you don't know he's a rapper from philadelphia and he wound up getting sent back to prison for four years for popping a wheelie so you know it's created this huge outcry in Philadelphia and for me it's just like a symbol of everything that's wrong with the criminal justice system this guy is like 30 years old now he's been out out of trouble basically for a long time he's a father but when he was 19 he got like arrested for having a gun and so he's been on probation for 12 years nobody in this room could be on probation for 12 years without doing something that would get them in trouble so basically he pops a wheelie and uh now he's gonna be in prison for four years that is insane yes when i saw the story

what what i immediately went to was the stanford uh rape case where that guy got four months and i and i just saw i was like what better example of a miscarriage of justice is i mean i didn't even know popping a wheelie was a crime oh well um if you're on a motorized dirt bike, yeah, you can't do that Nobody's popping a wheelie at the speed limit Oh, I see You pop a wheelie at high speeds Right, right, right In residential areas

I'll be honest with you, because what I thought is, well, when you pop a wheelie, you're basically on a unicycle I'm just telling you You've not been in when you pop a wheelie, you're basically on a unicycle. I'm just telling you. You've not been in the hood for a long time, bro. That's not... How good would that excuse have been? Nah, dog, that's a unicycle. Nah, playboy, you tripping right now. Listen, me and my niggas ride unicycles.

When you are Jewish, and you grow up on Long Island in New York and you are in a car, I'm plotting for Long Island. When you are in a car and someone in a motorcycle goes by, the same thing is said every time. Death wish. Death wish. Never ride a motorcycle.

Never ride a motorcycle. Never ride a motorcycle. And then there's this long, meandering story. Every time, like, my friend's friend rode a motorcycle. They used all the organs. Like, to this day, like, honestly, there's two things that were, like, maybe three things that were drilled into my head more than any other as a kid. Don't smoke. Don't ride a motorcycle. Be a lawyer.

And, you know, two for three. Let's spin it again. It has landed on Christian Bale gaining and losing weight again and again and again. I don't know if you guys saw the photos of Christian Bale gaining weight to play, I believe, Dick Cheney. Is that right? What a choice. I have to tell you, I find Christian Bale doing this offensive as someone who could never look like Christian Bale

at the Batman weight, you know? And it's like, being Christian Bale at the Batman weight is the coolest fucking thing. Like that's so hard. You're like, ha, now I'm going to get down to the machinist weight where I'm 85 pounds and then I'm going to gain it up again. I don't know what is American graffiti. I don't know. Not a cycle.

Hustle. American hustle. I don't know. Whatever. The more recent one where he gained weight. Then he loses it again to get back to dark knight shape

he was in dark knight shape three times I can't believe Batman is Chaney Batman is Chaney but Batman Chaney is Batman

Batman is Chaney honestly there were some in dark knight you know there's a little bit of that you remember DeVan remembers

yeah I love that I'm not gonna ask him a question about superheroes again because I thought it was a fun thing we were doing but he hated it but it just kills me because it's like hey Christian Bale do you know how lucky you are to get to be that handsome all the time

and you're like now I'm gonna prove how good of an actor I am by making my face so bad and my body bad it's worth noting still not sexiest man alive. That's true. Still lost to Blake Shelton. It was the timing. Yeah.

It was he caught them on a bad swing. And that's the shame of it. That's the shame of it. Spin the wheel. Justin Bieber won a Latin Grammy as far as I'm concerned it's about fucking time Despacito is good and I don't care that he doesn't know what the words mean and can't say them I don't care it It was about time.

I'm sick of all these Latinos and Latinas winning Latin Grammys. When's it our turn, Cristela? Stop hoarding all the Latin Grammys. How did I know that you were going to ask me? I didn't know until I looked at you. I had to read your face to see if I could. By the way... What if I just went like this?

No, I would have gone to Van about something about Supergirl. Can I just say, first of all, I'm going to admit, I've never heard Despacito. How? I've never heard of it. How. I've never heard of it. How? I've never heard the song. How is that possible?

I've never heard the song. One dude's over there clapping his ass off. You're clapping for not listening to music? No, actually, I love music, and that's why I haven't heard it. Because I average about two, three hours of music. I listen to a minimum two, three hours of music every day. And when you like certain music, you play that music. So I don't listen to what the kids are listening to.

So I didn't know. I thought, when I first heard of Despacito, I thought it was a Justin Bieber song. Because he was getting all the credit for actually contributing to the song. So then I remember there was a big backlash about that. And everybody's like, hey, Justin Bieber didn't do shit on this. He's part of it, but it's not the song. So then I remember there was a big backlash about that. And everybody's like, hey, like Justin Bieber didn't do shit on this. Like he's part of it, but it's not his song. And now when I see that, that he won a Latin Grammy, I was like, now people know that he won it. But people don't know the artists that won the Latin Grammys that are Latino. Wow, this one. But you know what I mean? I honestly don't know either. And I never heard of Despacito till Guy

Brand was on the show and was talking about it as the song of the summer. And then I asked the audience, who sings Despacito? And it was like a book report. It was very complicated. It's a remix and there's Justin Bieber and there's other people.

There's like five remixes. The music video has like, I think, 50 Latinos in it. You don't know who. I think we're all related in it. But I've seen the Latin Grammys, and I'll tell you, I've watched the Latin Grammys since I was a kid because I knew the performers on it, and I

always thought they were neglected, and I will say that I hope the glimmer of hope that I have in this is that maybe now that Justin Bieber has won one, maybe people will pay attention to it more and know that we actually matter and have been for years. So, I i mean that's what i'm talking about and and i and i have to tell you that i think it is so brave of you to come out here and say that justin bieber is a civil rights hero

and and bringing bringing attention and and validation to this important cause but you know i'm gonna be serious here a lot of times especially as a Latina, Mexican-American, a lot of people won't pay attention to us until someone that's white or somebody actually vouches for us. So I'm going to go out there and say that. So right now, Justin Bieber being part of Despacito, that actually, that to some people makes people take notice of the song that they might not have noticed before.

I will go on record as saying that because my entire life has been spent yelling and yelling and yelling about opinions that nobody listens to it falls on deaf ears and right now i'm at the point where i need every fucking ounce of help i can get that that also might be true about selena gomez's music who's that i've never heard of Selena Gomez. I'm kidding. Are you kidding? No, I'm kidding. Okay, okay.

No, but, you know, look, Selena won a Latin Grammy. Did she? People didn't know that. Right, exactly. That's my point, you know? Like, there's, like, a band named Los Tigres del Norte. Huge band. Thank you.

By the way, real quick, are there Latinos in this room? Wow, look at you. By the way, real quick, are there Latinos in this room? Wow, look at you. I mean, there's certain bands that are iconic, and I always have to tell people, if they're not familiar with Latino artists, I always have to kind of find the English counterpart, the American counterpart to what they are. So when people ask about Vicente Fernandez,

I'm like, it's kind of like Elvis, but he's bigger because he's been around longer. So, you know, for like, you know, so it's that kind of thing. Because he's not dead. Yeah, exactly. Here's the thing. Justin Bieber, Latino hero. The Flash, gay.

Aquaman, useless. Langston Kerman, host of the show. Hey! Langston! Langston! Langston Kerman, host of the show. Hey! Langston! Langston! Langston! I want to thank our panel, Langston Kerman, Christella Alonzo, and Van Jones.

This was very fun. Thank you guys for coming out. Have a great night! It's love it or leave it. Straight to time. Love it or leave it. It's love it or leave it. Straight shooter Loving or leaving is loving or leaving Respecting all those acts Loving or leaving is loving or leaving Straight shooter

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