Lovett or Leave It - Lie of the Storm

Episode Date: May 25, 2019

Trump "storms" out on Pelosi, anti-choice laws lead to mass protest, and Kellyanne Conway auditions for Real Housewives of Washington. Plus we quiz the panel on Trump's tariffs and quiz the audience on an immigration extremist's bonkers list of demands. Activist Nourbese Flint and comedians Joel Kim Booster and Megan Gailey join Jon to break down the week's news, celebrate Cher's birthday, and consider a lovely trip to Mykanos.

Good evening, Los Angeles. Great to be back at the improv. How's everybody doing? Look at your beautiful smiling faces. None of you are going to storm out in a huff. Before we get to our show, two important things to discuss. One, Love It or Leave It is coming back to Minneapolis on June 7th.

You can go to crooked.com slash events to get your tickets. When I was last in Minneapolis, in April of last year, there was a foot of snow on the ground. If not more, we almost had to cancel the show. We almost weren't able to fly in. We almost weren't able to fly

out. Many said, you gotta cancel. You gotta reschedule. And you know what I said? I said, no. The show must go on. And people came in their snowshoes. Some people made it, but a lot of people had to cancel. And I said to them, I'll be back. And I meant it. And now they need to buy some fucking tickets. Otherwise, fool me once, Minneapolis. Also, and this is important, this week

Crooked Media announced a brand new podcast called This Land. It's the story of two murders, nearly two centuries apart, connected because of an upcoming Supreme Court decision that will determine the story of two murders nearly two centuries apart connected because of an upcoming Supreme Court decision that will determine the fate of a convicted killer, five tribes, and nearly half the land of Oklahoma. It's an incredible docuseries from Rebecca Nagel, a citizen of the Cherokee Nation, and an Oklahoma journalist. You won't want to miss it. Very exciting. So check that out. You can subscribe right now. Listen to the trailer wherever you

get your podcasts. Wherever you do that. That's where you can get it. Look, I think it is fair to say in this life that there are two kinds of people. There are people who storm out of rooms. And there are people who are like, that guy just fucking stormed out of here. Search your hearts. You know what kind of person you are.

I think you know what kind of person I am. I think you know what kind of person I am. I've stormed out of a room in my day. Not because it was a negotiating tactic. Would that it were. And I realized something. I realized something when I was thinking about this. Yes, there are two kinds of people. There are the people that storm and the people that get stormed out on.

But that also means that there's couples that say they never fight. They're very even keeled. They say things like, we fight. We had an argument about the babysitter. They got pretty intense, but then we realized we were both being crazy and apologized. You know those couples that are just like fucking, they don't seem like they ever

actually get heated with each other? They're the fucking worst. Then, there are the couples where both members of the couple are storm-out types. This is crazy love. This is Annabella Sciorra and James Gandolfini in The Sopranos.

This is the couple in To Live and Die in L.A. These are people that go to a fucking 10. These are people that throw wine at each other on the subway and then fuck. You know, these are crazy couples. Every fight devolves. It's not workable. The candle burns bright and it burns fast.

And then there, I think, are most couples. I bet most couples in here would describe themselves. There's a stormer and a person who gets stormed out on. Look, sometimes there's a person in the couple that storms out and there's somebody that says things like, no, John, you don't look fat in the power couple gay issue. Too specific? Anyway, Donald Trump stormed out of a meeting We have to talk about it Donald Trump is a classic stormer

You could even call him a daily stormer Nancy Pelosi has more of a Dowager Countess vibe A kind of, you know What's all the fuss? Is it time for his nap? Anyway, Trump loves storming out. It's actually one of his favorite moves. We all have no memories.

We're all just Twitter goldfish now. But he actually pulled this exact same stunt on the exact same human beings in January, literally four and a half months ago, when he famously went, bye-bye. Remember when he went, bye-bye? It's his move. It's his favorite move.

He thinks it's really effective. It's like his art of the deal thing. Deal bad. I say deal bad. I walk out. People scared. No deal. Give me better deal. He also stormed out of his own divorce proceedings. People don't know that, but Bloomberg reported that when he was in his divorce proceedings with Ivana, he stormed out.

I don't know if that affected the terms at all. Anyway, it's worth remembering that they were there to discuss infrastructure. Yeah, he may have stormed out. By the way, to a Rose Garden press conference in which there was a graphics package waiting for him, which is an innovative

way to be too angry to conclude a meeting, because I would like to end a lot of my fights with a pre-made PowerPoint. Here are the reasons I was too angry to continue. If you'll go to the next slide here's the moment where I was overcome with emotion. But anyway it seems to me that Donald Trump would rather claim the reason they're not going to pass an infrastructure bill is because Congress is investigating him for no reason, rather than what's actually the case, which is Mitch McConnell and Mick Mulvaney are not going to pass a $2 trillion infrastructure bill.

They would rather put trans Bernie Sanders on the Supreme Court than raise taxes on the wealthy to pay for a fucking train. And it's worth remembering that Justin Amash, Amash? Amash. He's a Republican with some amount of what we used to call integrity, outlined as clearly and logically as any person, Democrat or Republican, has the case against Donald Trump, the case for impeachment, the case for the ways in which he's violated his oath of office.

It is also worth remembering that reporters have spent the last week since Justin Amash started tweeting these things, saying that Republicans all agree privately what wonderful people they must be privately. Oh, the courage they show privately. All the good things they think when they're alone. And it's worth remembering that Democrats agree with Amash publicly,

but then don't follow the logical conclusion of where Amash's statements lead. And it's worth remembering that one of the reasons Trump may be upset, beyond just the fact that Nancy Pelosi said the phrase cover-up to describe the cover-up, is that despite Democrats dragging their heels, it seems as though we may be close to getting some information. Federal judges in New York and D.C. rejected Trump's argument against subpoenas seeking Trump's financial information. The Justice Department agreed to share counterintelligence information from

the Russia investigation with the House Intelligence Committee. New York State passed a bill so that Congress can obtain Trump's state tax returns. And a leaked IRS memo indicates that government tax lawyers believe the IRS will likely have no choice but to turn over six years of Trump's tax returns to Congress. And it is worth remembering what started this little fracas

is Nancy Pelosi describing Trump's unprecedented rejection of congressional oversight, his administration's breaking the law to hide his tax returns, the subpoena's ignored and witnesses tampered with as a cover-up when that's exactly what it is. So to me, it seems as though Trump is engaging in an absurd performance, but maybe so are the rest of us. Because if Republicans are pretending publicly not to agree with Amash when they agree with him privately, and Democrats are publicly agreeing with Amash while privately talking about how they can't follow through on what that means,

maybe Trump's not the only one engaging in theater. Because the further we get, the more Trump obstructs, the more it becomes clear that impeaching Trump isn't the theater. It seems like not impeaching him is. And I don't know what the right thing is, and anybody who claims to know what impeachment will do for us, whether it's the right strategy or not at this point, I think doesn't totally know. I think it is an unknown, and I am reluctant to question Nancy Pelosi

because of the oath I took with the blood in that cave. But... But I will say this. If we don't see those tax returns, I swear to God, I'm gonna fucking get up from this restaurant and I'm gonna walk the hell out. There's no... No, you listen to me. You listen to me.

Every time you bring this up, and every time I say the exact same fucking thing, I want the tax returns, and you look at me like I'm crazy. Don't look at me like that. I swear to God, no, I don't care if people are starting to say, I'm talking quietly, I know I look intense. I don't care. I don't care. Why do you care what the fucking waiter thinks?

Why do you care what the fucking waiter thinks? Why do you care what any of these people think? Care what I think? Why am I the only person you don't consider in this fucking conversation? I want the tax returns. I keep saying it over and over again. Give me those fucking tax returns. I'm leaving. I'm going to put that shit on my reel. Let's start the show.

We have a fantastic panel. She is the policy director and manager of reproductive justice programs at Black Women for Wellness. Please welcome Norbeze Flint. Thanks for being here. Thanks for inviting me. This is fun. I mean, so far. She is a

co-host on Crooked Media's Hysteria. Please welcome back the very funny Megan Gailey. Hi. I've come to really enjoy the way Megan joins the stage with a glass of wine in her hand. I just, I need it.

It's not my medicine, but my Lexapro's my medicine, and I need that too. But I do like mixing them and seeing what happens. And my mom's here tonight, so I've got a DD if I need one. And he's written for the shows Big Mouth and The Other Two,

and you can see him this fall on the new NBC sitcom Sunnyside. Please welcome Joel Kim Booster. Hi, Joel. Thank you so much. I realized before we got here that I wore the worst pants for a podcast because every time I move my legs, it feels like someone's whispering. But what are they saying?

You'll have to tune in and find out to NBC this fall after The Good Place. Nice. Thank you. Let's get into it. What a week. As I'm sure you're all aware, last week Alabama passed one of the most extreme anti-choice bills, officially banning abortions in nearly all cases, making it the first outright ban on abortion in the U.S. But Alabama is just one of eight states that have

passed bills to severely restrict reproductive rights. Georgia, Kentucky, Missouri, Mississippi, Ohio, Arkansas, and Utah have all passed restrictive bills. All of them were passed as direct challenges to Roe v. Wade. Trump and McConnell's success in putting right-wing judges on the court, including Kavanaugh, has emboldened the anti-choice movement. But the response against these laws has also been inspiring. Organizations like the ACLU and NARAL are challenging these laws in court. People across the country have donated to grassroots organizations like Yellowhammer in Alabama, the Mississippi Reproductive Freedom Fund, and the Gateway Fund in Missouri. Men and women are stepping up to volunteer as clinic escorts, making sure that patients in search

of care at Planned Parenthood and other health care centers didn't have to face a gauntlet of protesters alone, and women began to share their personal experiences with abortion. I also want to point out something that's happening simultaneously in Nevada. This week, the Nevada Assembly actually passed a bill that removes anti-abortion restrictions, like requiring doctors to ask about marital status and rules around what doctors have to say to patients. And by the way, Nevada is the first state ever in the U.S. where women are the majority of lawmakers. So while 25 white men made the Alabama abortion ban possible, this is what a more diverse representative legislature can do. Local elections matter. Local elections determine whether states are respecting the autonomy of human beings

called Wim, Waman, Weeman, Weeman. Or hoping Brett Kavanaugh is the fifth vote to strip anyone who's not a coal-fired power plant of basic fucking rights. And if that wasn't enough, these local politicians draw the maps that determine congressional districts, so so much is on the line. Can you guys do me a favor? When I say Jerry, can you just say Mandarin? This is for legal purposes? That's why Crooked has launched the Fuck Jerry...

Mandarin. Fund. Because for legal reasons, we can't just call it Fuck Jerry, we have to call it Fuck Jerry... Mandarin. Because there's that Fuck Jerry, and then't just call it Fuck Jerry. We have to call it Fuck Jerry. Mandering. Because there's that Fuck Jerry, and then this is Fuck Jerry. Mandering. Thank you.

If you go to votesaveamerica.com slash donate, you can help flip state legislatures. We're starting in Virginia, where Data for Progress has identified 10 districts where we can make the biggest difference in the upcoming elections to help take back the Virginia statehouse and make sure that we can make the biggest difference in the upcoming elections to help take back the Virginia State House and make sure that we can stop Republicans from drawing districts that shut Democrats out and prevent people from having a voice in their elections, as well as being able to stop heinous measures like what we're seeing pass across the country. So please go to

votesaveamerica.com slash donate to participate there. All right, but now let's talk about what's been happening. Norbeze, can you talk a little bit about the work you do at Black Women for Wellness? Yeah, so Black Women for Wellness is a 21, 22-year-old organization, I say we're just legal, organization that is in South Los Angeles, and we are a reproductive justice organization. And to be clear, we don't use reproductive rights, reproductive health, we use reproductive justice. And reproductive justice is something, a framework that was created by black women to take an intersectional approach to how do we look at solving issues around women's and people's autonomy, right? And so that's what Black Women for Wellness does. We take intersectional approaches to looking at how to solve the issues of systemic and institutional barriers for black women in California. restrictions because they are a step beyond what we'd seen in the past. And yet there's a lot of

more subtle and insidious ways in which women, and everybody really, but women are being denied access to reproductive care and healthcare generally. What are some of the issues that you see that don't get the amount of attention they deserve that are affecting people, not just in states like Alabama, but even in places like California? Right. So, gosh, there's so many. Have anybody heard of Title 10? It's like, great. So this is a regulation that we have. And it's for family planning.

And a lot of times people talk about Trump, but this is, I feel like it's a Pence idea. And essentially, we have an international gag rule, which says that if you are talking about abortion, providing abortion services, we're not going to give you any money. They are trying to do that right now here, right? So it is in court. California sued. But if this regulations go into effect, we're going to lose many of the clinics in our state and across the country. There's another thing that's going on called fake clinics or crisis pregnancy centers. Has anybody heard of those? I didn't hear of them for a long time.

There are actually more crisis pregnancy centers or fake clinics than they are real clinics across the country and also here in California. So what does that mean? These are clinics that trick women. You go inside, you think you're going to a clinic, maybe just for pregnancy care. I want to figure out if I'm pregnant or not, right? And there are folks who, like, they're dressing like doctors and nurses' outfits, and essentially they'll sit you down and be like, okay, we'll tell you what to do. And then they sit there and lie to you. They have closed doors. They have locked women in.

They'll show you crazy videos. And so people are getting denied care that they wanted. That's something that's also happening. So people are getting denied care that they wanted. That's something that's also happening. Alabama is the culmination of, I feel like, maybe a 25-year plan to roll back abortion rights. There was this kind of big move in the, I would say, the 90s,

where they were like, okay, let's figure out how to pick off all the pieces of rolling back abortion rights. So they started with folks of color. So if you might have seen these billboards that came up not too long ago that said the most dangerous place for a black baby is in a black womb. They posted those in California. They posted them in New York. They posted them in the area. So they started trying to curve out folks of color.

And then you saw these things called trap laws, which are targeted regulatory abortion providers, targeted regulations of abortion providers. There we go. I don't want to be like Ben Carson. And these are laws that were statistically moved to make really hard to give clinics care, right? And so that's what Whole Woman's Health was about, but they've been rolling those out for a long time. And that's why in places like Mississippi and a couple of other southern states, there's only one clinic.

And then lastly, what you see now is just like all gloves are off, right? From January 1st to about May 20th, there's been over 300 anti-abortion legislation introduced, and about 40% of them have passed. And so this is quite an onslaught. So there's about 10 states that have abortion bans, about 17 different bans, and they are rolling them out. And here in California, a lot of times we're like, oh, we're lucky because we're safe, and we are privileged, right, because we have a badass legislator that is like not here, not today. But even with that, there are still half of the counties in the state that do not have an abortion provider.

There are still people because of funding, because of how high it costs to live in this state who cannot get to a clinic. There are still folks who have to sleep in bathrooms, who face protesters here in this state and everything that we have done is hard fought so we can't sleep on it. Megan, I'm going to ask you a question. So we can't sleep on it. Megan, there's been a big response to what we've seen happen in Alabama and what we've seen happen in other states. Have you found that men in your life have been saying the right things and participating in a way that is helpful to you? Or do you think some have not done that?

I think I can take this one, John. Megan, I'm sorry, Joel was speaking. I did, sadly, because Joel is one of my very good friends and knows the innermost details of my life. I was, like, kind of relieved. To be like, you know what, you should take this one. I mean, full disclosure, and today is the first day I've ever talked publicly about it, I have had an abortion.

I had an abortion in the state of New York. I did not have money to pay for it, and it was a service that was provided for me. That is something that my brothers know, my fiance knows. And even given that, and these are, these are blue men. I really had to beat it over their head. Like it can't just be me yelling. I need you to, as I said on hysteria, lead with your fucking wallet, take it out, give us your money, because we need it right now, and listen to us, and process it, and see us. I am your sister, I am your daughter, I have gone through this, it was traumatic for me, I suffered complications from it, I want you to hear this story, I want you to hear the story of other women that have been through this

and feel what we are feeling right now to be called murderers in public. And I want you to be as pissed as I'm fucking pissed right now. Joel, there's literally nothing you can say. Yeah, I don't know why I'm here. I was here for that one bit, and now I think I can go. No, I do want to say, though, really quickly, as a gay man, there is a temptation, I think, for our community to take a step back from these issues

and not be loud, because it does seem distant from us. You know, like, I am never going to have a a child I'm in no danger of getting a woman pregnant accidentally it is not something that seems relevant to me and yet it's something that I feel like we all have to be even louder about in our community I mean I wouldn't be standing here if it wasn't for Kristen Roeder and Sarah Casey who held my hand in 10th grade and told me it was okay to be gay and I just want it like, it comes to, like, if all the rich, white gay men out there,

with all of your expendable income, because you're not having fucking kids, take one less trip to Mykonos and send it to Yellowhammer! I don't know that they're ready to make that sacrifice. I mean, I think they were all on board, and then you tried to cancel Mykonos. Narvaez, what are some things people can do

to help support the work you are doing right now? Give resources, but that also means your time. Yes, folks need your money, but also folks need your time, even if it's just to drive somebody to a visit. If it's to hold somebody's hand, that's really important. And then we also need you to remember this. A lot of times we get into the space and we're like really angry now, and then it comes to November, and then we forget. We need folks to be allies, or what my mom says, we need accomplices, right? So folks who are standing side by side with us, who are saying, no, this is not

okay. You cannot go after women. You cannot go after women of color. We cannot say, well, maybe because, you know, he's good on this issue, or she's good on this issue, that we let this go. you know, he's good on this issue or she's good on this issue that we let this go. And so for me, it's just like really being in solidarity with folks. And that doesn't mean in private, what we were just talking about earlier, right? The whispers, but being like in solidarity with folks and standing hand in hand, because it is tough. Our folks are out here not knowing what to do. People are scared.

are out here not knowing what to do. People are scared. And it can't always be women who are standing on the front lines to say, no, this is not enough. We need our folks to be right there with us. Yeah. I'd like to add one thing really quick. And I know it's hard. And I know it's hard because it's all very new in the sort of zeitgeist and in the ether, but when we talk about these conversations too, I do think it's important to center people, including trans men and non-binary people who also struggle to get this kind of care and are often blocked

from getting reproductive health services as well. And I do think that it's such a small part of the conversation, but it does need to be said and to erase that experience is kind of difficult and sad. And so it's such a small part of the conversation, but it does need to be said and it needs to, like, to erase that experience is kind of difficult and sad, and so it's hard. I get it. It's hard. It's hard to, like, open

up and change the way we think, and the paradigm is shifting as we speak, but it is something I think we need to open up into. Yeah, I think that's right. And to what both of you said, it is about not just dividing women, but dividing reproductive care from all other forms of care as well. And Planned Parenthood has been there not just for people who need access to reproductive health, people who need abortions.

It's also been there for gay men for a very long time, for people who don't have anywhere to turn and want to get an HIV test. It's there for people in their communities when they need it the most. And part of what conservatives have done for a very long time on this issue is try to cordon off reproductive health from all the other forms of healthcare. But what I think the stories we're hearing are revealing and what your organization is doing is reminding people that that's not possible. It's just not possible. You can't just treat the uterus as a disembodied thing floating through the air waiting to be regulated right like we for some reason we call it like the bikini area so everything that's covered by a bikini that's what people like separate into

something else and so yeah i can't underline how important it is for us to think about it as whole care like right now californ California is past of being again a progressive state and looking at how to expand access so there's a bill SB 24 that we need folks to call on to um to span abortion access on college campuses right and so yeah gender non-conforming and trans folks they also need to be centered in that conversation and so many times that we don't do that and so thank you for like reminding and bringing that up because I just it's important to always be like checking and rechecking ourselves and sometimes we think we're like super woke but just to make sure that we're also you know being

mindful about our language right because that matters the hard conversation I'm really glad we had it thank you for the work that you're doing Megan thank. Thank you for sharing that with us. I know that can't be easy. When we come back, OK Stop. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back.

Now it's time for OK Stop. We'll roll a clip and the panel can say OK Stop at any point to comment. Nancy Pelosi is the highest-ranking woman ever elected to office in the history of the United States and second in line to the presidency. Kellyanne Conway is a former pollster who spends all day bullshitting for racist con men she hoped would lose to Ted Cruz. So, of course, Kellyanne expects Nancy Pelosi to treat her like an equal. But it didn't play out that way after Conway's boss, Donald something, abruptly stormed out

of a meeting with the Speaker. Let's take a listen as Kellyanne Conway tells Fox News her side of the story. What happened in the White House yesterday? You were there and actually had an exchange of words with the Speaker yourself. I did. And all these ridiculous stories. The President was in a rage, he's fuming, he stormed out, temper tantrum, there was none of that.

He actually never raised his voice. He came in, stood at the end of the table in the cabinet room outside the Oval, and said, look folks, I wanna do infrastructure. Okay, stop. That's exactly, I'm sure, how it sounded. Look folks. I wanna do infrastructure. Look folks, I'm sure, how it sounded. I want to do infrastructure. Look, folks, I want to do infrastructure.

I want to do great things for this country. We've been doing great things for this country. But within the last hour, you had a meeting and came out and said I'm engaged in a cover-up. That's not true. But he took the case directly to Nancy Pelosi because she was the one who came to the mics and said that the president was engaged in a coverup,

which is not- Okay, stop. First of all, I'm really happy to get back to being a petty bitch. That's actually where I live, and really didn't wanna bare my soul, and now I'm here for you, Kelly. Kelly is like, Kelly Ann, sorry,

I don't mean to be disrespectful. First of all, I do feel like she has turned her look up, and I am a little excited about that. I'm glad you said that. We finally got a statement necklace that's like I wouldn't wear, but like my aunt might. TJ Maxx realness. Exactly.

She's a Maxxinista. But what bothers me about her, so we see a lot of Kellyanne's in like the Bravo universe. There's a lot of like hairdressers of housewives that are like no no no no they actually didn't do that and on bravo we don't put them on tv uh and i say we because i watch it don't work there so why does she get to be on television when she is lower than anyone i've ever seen on television. She brings nothing. She truly is a minion and that's

disrespectful to the minions. Megan, I actually have to disagree with you. I actually believe that what we're looking at here is one of the greatest tragedies of our time, which is that there were two roads in front of Kellyanne Conway. One where she became a

soulless sycophant for a monster. And then the other where she became one of the greatest Real Housewife villains of all time. She's not rich! She could have been there. She's not rich! She is rich! Half of them are! Teresa Giudice is rich?

Come on! Yes, and her husband is being deported and they're going to Trump. So Teresa is higher than Kellyanne. and they're going to Trump. So Teresa is higher than Kellyanne. She is rich because the husband who tweets negatively about her all day is a very successful attorney. And believe it or not,

she was, I guess, paid to do things before this. So the president said, let's work on infrastructure. And then he left very calmly. And I want to emphasize that because he never raised his voice a single time, was very polite and said, you can't have two tracks. You can't call say that I'm engaged in a cover up. You can't want to impeach and investigate and not and then pretend you want to legislate. You know, that's that's been what Trump has been saying since the State of the Union.

Right. We can have peace and legislation or war and investigation, which again, beautiful writing. Stephen Miller is the, it's as if, look, Shakespeare got hit on the head and woke up dumb and racist. But when someone says, oh, are you refusing to help the country because you're trying to stop them from investigating you, you're not supposed to say, yes, that's the plan.

You're supposed to say, of course not, even though it's the plan. I also think that you can get two things done at once. Like, I've seen lots of couples going through a divorce who are like, give me my shit, and then are also like, hey, can you take Tim to school? You know, like you can be fighting with someone and also get shit done. I was in a sorority.

That was four years of my life. Then Speaker Pelosi went on and launched into some odd self-curated history of infrastructure in our country. She talked about Thomas Jefferson. Then she got to Teddy Roosevelt. And so... For those listening at home, Kellyanne did some

magnificent acting. It was real, really good space work. She checked her watch, because she was bored. She was performing what it was like when she was bored. She was performing what it was like when she was bored in the meeting

by showing us a watch check during this interview. And I bought it. I believed it. I believed every moment of it. Was she watch checking to Teddy Roosevelt?

Like, ugh. Not Teddy. Exactly. Every time someone brings up Teddy, I'm like, ugh, are we done? You know?

I said, respectfully, Madam Speaker, would you like to address some of the specifics the president talked about? And she said, I don't. I talked to the president. I don't talk to staff. Okay, stop. You can take this. What specifics did he talk about?

He said literally nothing in her own words, in her own transcript of the conversation. He said nothing before he left. Also, not a good impersonation of Nancy. What's this place? I don't know. It's like we all know how Nancy sounds, and it's rich and shaky. Because let's face it, she's the sixth most rich member of Congress. She treats everybody like they're her staff.

Okay, stop. Kellyanne Conway, you are staff. You are the president's staff. And when she says I don't talk to you, I talk to the president, that's because she's the speaker of the motherfucking house. And Kellyanne Conway may

have respect for literally nothing but power. Power is the only thing she seems to admire. But that doesn't change the fact that Nancy Pelosi is the first woman to be Speaker of the House. This is her fucking second time at the rodeo. She has been dealing with useless, phony apparatchiks like you for her entire career. Just chewing them up and spitting them out on the House floor. So when she treats you like staff,

it's because you fucking deserve it. And when she says she will have a conversation with the president, it's because she is the leader of the House of Representatives, not a co-equal branch, a word that does nothing better than the word equal. that does nothing better than the word equal. Not a co-equal branch. Not an equal branch.

What that co is doing, why it has slipped into our fucking ecosystem, I have no idea. Co-equal? Where do our fucking brains go? Oh, it's a co-equal branch. Boy, you sound like a goddamn Federalist paper, which you would sound more like if you recognized that there's a reason

it's Article fucking 1. It's not equal. It's better. And I didn't spend a century making the presidency more powerful than it should be, but it happened. But it doesn't change the fact that Nancy Pelosi doesn't have to talk to you if she doesn't fucking want to talk to you. And there's a reason she'd probably prefer to Pelosi doesn't have to talk to you if she doesn't fucking want

to talk to you and there's a reason she'd probably prefer to talk to Donald Trump than talk to you because talking to Donald Trump is easy because it's like talking to a three year old who just took some meth what an odd ideological POV to come at from she had a DSA meeting like talking about

rich people as though she doesn't work for like the people who want to keep people in this country? It's insane. 39 million. That's what Kellyanne Conway's, I believe, financial disclosure. I take it back. I take it back. I take it back. She may have more money than Andy.

See, I think her saying six the richest is a dig. I think she's like, ugh, not even in the top five. Again, incredible housewife material. Shouldn't be in the White House, but incredible housewife. I'm either her maid or her driver or her pilot or her makeup artist. Her pilot? Like, that's just staff everyone has. Kellyanne Conway really is such a villain.

It's like trying to make this about the way Nancy Pelosi talked to you as if that's important at all. It also implies that Kellyanne Conway deserves any form of respect. Like, just not spitting on her is, I think, like, literally just like, just like allowing her to be in the same room at you

without fucking screaming at the top of your lungs about the unholy, broken fucking injustice of her being powerful. Just managing to get through the meeting without ripping off the top of your head, taking out your brain and fucking hurling it at her is the respect she deserves. And you know what? You know who agrees? No, he doesn't really agree. We don't know what he thinks,

but he's definitely closer to agreement than she would like, her husband. And I don't want to judge a marriage. We don't know what goes on when those doors are closed. But we do know that when she thinks she's off the record, she insults her own husband. And he takes to Twitter every single day to say that Donald Trump shouldn't be president. And that has got to be lonely. So I get why she's lashing out. And I said to her, how very pro-woman of you, per usual, because she's not very pro-woman. She's pro-some woman, a few woman. I'm actually speechless.

I was just like, um, out of, yeah. So I don't even know what to say about that other than, like, out of all people in all administrations who are trying to roll back everything that has to do, there are people walking around with real live handmaid's tale, like, robes every day. And so she's like, no, we're pro-women.

I'm just confused. Must be frustrating for Kellyanne, because it is true that, like, in terms of being one of the scummiest fucking operatives ever to walk through the halls of the White House, she did break a glass ceiling. Before her, it was really...

There has never been a woman as scummy as her to reach as high as she did in that White House organization, and shame on you liberals for not recognizing that. Now, that is OK Stop.

But before we go, you see, someone raised Kellyanne's little diatribe in a press conference with Speaker Pelosi. And she did respond. And I thought it would be a nice palate cleanser. Let's take a look.

Kellyanne Conway made a remark to you at the end of the meeting. She's apparently expanded on her remarks. I'm not going to tell you that though. I responded as the Speaker of the House to the President of the United States. Other conversations people want to have among themselves is up to them.

I fucking love that. I love her hand motion in the video, which I would encourage anyone listening to look up because she basically, her arm goes so high, both to like put Kellyanne Conway in a grave, but also like to kind of, it comes down and just like lowers Kellyanne. But it's also like, here's where I'm at,

Speaker of the House, this is the president. And then her hand goes down and out to just be like and whatever other conversations people want to have they can have but I'm Nancy Pelosi I don't give a fucking shit when we come back

we'll play a game about tariffs don't go anywhere this is love it or leave it and there's more on the way and we're back! Tariffs. They're a thing we all deeply understand, and if you ask us about them,

we would be able to explain what they are in vivid detail. But in case you don't know about tariffs, we'll explain them here from memory without any help from our researcher, Peter. Trump, the self-described tariff man, imposed tariffs on 250 billion dollars of goods China exports to the US. He's repeatedly insisted that China pays the tariffs but that's incredibly false. Tariffs are import taxes.

When a US firm imports something from China they have to pay the 25% tax to US customs. They'll typically pass this cost off to consumers or manufacturers. If it is the manufacturers they will likely pass it on too. The cost tends to find its way to consumers in the end. According to one recent analysis, the $72 billion in revenue from all Trump's tariffs is equivalent to one of the biggest tax hikes since 1993. It's greater, for example, than the tax revenue collected in each of the first three years after the Affordable Care Act passed, except this time we don't get health insurance for 20 million people out of the deal.

Regular people pay more for the stuff they need, and they don't get anything in return. There's no built-in spending plan on, say, a highway fund to help stimulate the economy and offset higher prices. So this got us thinking. If this was a $72 billion tax on the wealthy, how could we use all this money we are giving to the government for nothing? And we want to highlight this question in a game we're calling There's a New Tariff in Town.

This is a game for our panel. Here's how it works. I'm going to ask the panel to figure out how much we could buy with that money that we are currently throwing in a pit to nowhere. All right? Are you guys ready? Sure. Okay.

Now, can we be wrong? I mean, have you listened? I thought, okay, we'll see. Like, there are correct answers. 100%. Oh, shit. Okay. Typical white woman.

Can we be wrong? Using the $72 billion we are losing from Trump's tariffs, what percentage of Bernie Sanders' free college plan could we pay for? Oh. 100%. Yeah, I... Okay. I'm going to say 150%.

Now we don't know what's... Okay, sure. Like, it was more than... 125? Yeah. One over 120% of the proposal would be paid for. I'm giving it to you, Narvize. Question two.

Flint, Michigan's water system still has 2,500 lead service lines. The U.S. as a whole has 6 million. What percentage of them could we replace with the 72 billion in government revenue from Trump's tariffs? Could you say that slower? If we spent the 72 billion on pipes that are currently lead-lined,

what percentage of the pipes? Okay, the pipes are coming from the east, and the train is coming from the west. What time do they get to Milwaukee? Could the $72 billion replace all the pipes? Yes.

Yeah. In fact, it can cover it more than two times over. 240% of the cost of replacing all those pipes for the 72 billion in tariffs now just being passed on to consumers question 3 72 billion dollars. How many times could you remake avatar scene by scene? Like 400 times no, I'm gonna say Itchy trigger finger. I've never seen it.

I've never seen it. I don't care. I'm going to say 32. Once? They didn't look very realistic. Honestly, like, could Avatar cost $72 billion? Maybe. Megan was closest.

It was 300 times. You shushed me. I did not. I heard an internal shush. It was an internal shush. Oh, boy. Stop yelling at me with your eyes. Question four.

If we want to generate $72 billion in tax revenue without making working and middle class people do all the heavy lifting, we would only have to impose a 1% tax on wealth over $80 million. That is so specific. What percentage of citizens would be affected by a tax on wealth over $80 million?

.01? .00?.00? 0.01. Megan, you got it. It's 0.03%. Thank you. Megan, you've won the game. Oh.

It's because you almost cried earlier. That's the only reason. I mean, the thing is, they're not reacting well to it, but we have done Molly together. So it is okay for him to say these things to me. When we come back, we're going to play a game about a man named Chris Kobach. I see why the applause was tepid.

Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. Chris Kobach. Good old KK. He's not a household name unless you have an SNM dungeon where you roleplay as D-list Trump goons because right-wing, right-racially animated grievance politics

is your kink and your safe word is Stacey Abrams. I'm sorry. But for those of you who don't remember Chris Kobach, a.k.a. KKK-1K, he led Trump's fake investigation into fake election fraud. He also primaried a Republican governor in Kansas only to lose to a Democrat in the general in one of the reddest states in America.

And thank God he did. And earlier this year, his name was floated to become Trump's immigration czar, and this may surprise you, he didn't get the job. But this week, someone leaked Kobach's list of demands in order to take the job, and they are wild. So wild, we don't think you'll be able to tell which is real and which is fake. In a game we're calling, It Never Hurts to Kobask.

Would someone out there like to play the game hi what's your name sissy nice to meet you where are you from New York New York what bring I'm familiar what brings you to what brings you to Los Angeles oh cool okay is it like an obligation cousin or is an excited to seeto-see-get-married cousin? No, excited-to-see-get-married cousin. Is the cousin here tonight? No, she's not. So then you mean it.

No. Sissy, this is a lightning round game. You have to tell us if what I say is a real demand on his immigration czar rider, which is not a thing, but here we are. It's 2019.

Racists have riders. Or is it one I made up? The real ones are word for word. Okay? No adulteration. Are you ready? Alright, here we go. POTUS sits down individually with czar and the secretaries of Homeland Security, Defense, Justice, Ag, Interior, and Commerce

and tells each of the secretaries to follow the directives of the czar without delay, subject to appeal to the president in cases of disagreement. True. Correct. Real. One-on-one weekly meetings with Baron, the son the Tsar never had. False. Yes.

Office in the West Wing. True. 24-7 access to either a DHS or DOD jet. Tsar must be on the border every week. False. No, he really asked for that. Insane. POTUS must promote czar's eventual book

about being in the administration on Twitter. True. No, that one's fake too. Assistant to the president rank at highest pay level for White House senior staff. True. Correct. At least one piggyback ride for Mitch McConnell

with an option for more if the czar enjoys the first one. Correct. Czar's own immigration podcast title, Go Back to Where You Came From. Czar must receive guac at no extra price. Served as the face of Trump immigration policy, the principal spokesman on television and in the media.

True. Yes. Weekly face-to-face lunch with VP where Zara's sandwich must have its crusts removed. Ability to spend weekends in Kansas with family on way from border back to D.C. unless POTUS needs Zara elsewhere. True.

Correct. Ability to spend some weekdays in Kansas with family and also to spend some time with POTUS family whenever Zara gets sick of Zara's family. False. Yeah. Promise that by November 1, 2019, the president will nominate Chris Kobach to be the DHS secretary unless Kobach wishes to

continue in Czar role. True. Correct. POTUS has to come to at least one of the Czar's improv shows per financial quarter. You got it. Sissy, you've won the game. And a parachute gift card. Thank you so much for playing.

Give it up for Sissy. When we come back, the rant wheel. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. Now it's time for the rant wheel.

You know how it works. We spin a wheel and we rant on whatever topic it lands on. This week on the wheel we have Tyrion Lannister, Cher's birthday, quote, I love Scott, end quote, milkshake attacks, teacher sick leave, Tubman on the 20, the Sprint T-Mobile merger,

and Instagram takedowns. Let's spin the wheel. It has landed on teacher sick leave. So this was something I learned this week, which I't know about which is ghastly in California once a teacher has exhausted their sick leave they are required to pay for the substitute

teacher who fills in for them yeah isn't that absolutely stunning isn't that an absolutely stunning statement of the priorities of this very wealthy state with you know, it's billionaires and Hollywood moguls?

So this is according to NPR. California law requires public school teachers on extended sick leave to pay for their own substitute teachers. A San Francisco unified elementary school teacher had to pay the cost of her own substitute while she underwent extended cancer treatment. Even though the doctor advised her not to return to work, she said she couldn't afford to stay home.

The problem is scrapping the 1976 law would strain already cash-strapped districts. They just don't have the money to cover this because we don't prioritize schools enough. So teachers from across the state plan to march on Sacramento on May 22nd to demand more funding for schools. across the state plan to march on Sacramento on May 22nd to demand more funding for schools. Teachers right now don't have access to the same kinds of protections and like disability benefits and sick benefits that some other California employees have. Anyway, it's an important and stealth issue and a reminder that we've seen teacher strikes in states that have had heinous right-wing austerity measures in places like Kansas and elsewhere. But right here in California, there's a reason there was a strike in LA. There's a reason teachers have been forced to go on strike.

And this is just yet another reminder of just how fucking insane it is that we act like we don't have the money to cover things like this when we are a state that is supposedly one of the liberal leaders and one of the bastions of the resistance. And yet teachers are forced to teach while undergoing chemotherapy because they don't have the money to pay for their own substitutes. So that is bananas. And I didn't know about it. I assume a lot of you didn't know about it. Now you do.

Now it's fucking in there. I thought this was going to be you ranting about teachers taking too much sick leave. And I was like, wow, I did not know what show I was coming on. I mean, let's face it. Sometimes the subs just put on Voyage of the Mimi. And it's like, we already saw Voyage of the Mimi, lady. And she's like, I don't give a shit. Let's spin it again.

It has landed on Cher's birthday. Okay. Guess who suggested it? I would like to start this rant by saying I also tried to get the movie Palms on here. That is starring Diane Keaton as a New York City public school teacher who chooses not to have kids and then moves into a retirement home and starts her own cheerleading group

and it is perfect and everyone should see it. Fuck John Wick. Second of all, I'll get to my other elder statesman woman. Cher turned 23. In my mind. Cher turned 73 this week. We have to start celebrating people while they are alive. What Cher does on Twitter, what she does on stage,

what she does across the world with head-to-toe Mackie. We have to say we love you, Cher. Thank you so much and I think she is the perfect person to do the Super Bowl halftime show after the disgusting travesty that was Maroon 5.

Give me Cher or give me my own death. Name one song by Maroon 5 you didn't love, okay? They're nothing but hits, nothing but hits. And yeah, his personality is obnoxious, but you love it. I have seen Maroon 5 in concert, and I have seen Cher in concert three times,

and I can tell you Cher puts on a lot better show. Follow-up. I remember when I was in high school and a song called... Believe. I was gonna... I cannot sing. The last time I successfully sang was when I played Oliver in the Camp Starlight production

of Oliver. And between the I successfully sang was when I played Oliver in the Camp Starlight production of Oliver. And between the summer where I was Oliver and the summer where I was cast as the Tin Man, not in The Wizard of Oz, but in an all-Jewish production of The Wiz. Oh no! No! And I remember two old theater

queens who operated the piano and directed the play being like, there it is, puberty. Bum-ba-da-bum-bum. And I just fell apart on stage. That is the last time I sung, but I remember when that song, Believe, came out. I remember a fact about it, which is that it obviously went to number one. And there were two

songs right in a row. There was another one she had right then that was also fucking awesome. And I learned at the time that she was one of the only artists, if not the only artist, to have a hit in four decades, in the 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, and the 2000s. Maybe it was five decades.

And today, yeah. Has she had a number one in the 10s? No. No, but we can make that happen. We can make it happen. Justice for burlesque. That could be it. I love that the two most famous Tin Men in the Wiz

are you and Neo. Yeah, listen. I didn't know it was wrong at the time because I was just a boy. Let's spin it again. I think that's me It's Landed on Tyrian Lannister Suggested by Norbeze Yes

So How to start Eleven years ago when I started this Journey of Game of Thrones where I felt like I was a much better person. Spoiler alert, spoiler alert, spoiler alert, spoiler alert, spoiler alert. Pause, pause, pause. If you want to...

Continue. Oh, sorry. If you haven't watched it by now... Seriously. Grow up. Right. I realized that Game of Thrones has actually made me a worse person because when I started, I was against inc Right. I realized that Game of Thrones has actually made me, like, a worse person

because, like, when I started, I was, like, against incest. I was, like... I, you know, had problems with, like, murdering folks. And by the end, I was, like, rooting for an aunt and a nephew to get together. So, that. But there's always this conversation

about Daenerys being like, they're trying to make her like a Donald's, right? And I think Tyrion was the real villain. He kept giving bad information on a regular and consistent basis, right? And then after Dany essentially did all the dirty work did buy her dragons lost them won the whole city then he was just like no I'm not with you no more right then he convinced John to murder her and then say nothing at his feet like at the thing didn't speak up for him and then came in and been like yo bruh so you know we tried to fight for you it didn't say nothing at his feet, like at the thing, didn't speak up for him. And they came in and been like, yo, bruh.

So, you know, we tried to fight for you. It didn't work out. So I'm going to be hands and you're going to be banished. So thanks. And I was just like, well, first I was like very hurt, but I was like, I thought when you were talking about the $72 billion, I was like, oh, can we remix season eight? But I was just like, this also shows that if we had just a couple of more

women writers in Game of Thrones, one, right, I think that this whole idea of making like Dany a monster would not have come through. We wouldn't have Ser Brienne outside in her robe and like crying over Jaime Lannister. And have a man who

didn't do nothing be in charge. Tell me what Bran did. Nothing. Take another nap, Bran. Take another fucking nap. I'm just saying, like, he's like, this is why I was here, bruh. And I was just like, everybody did the whole job for him,

and he just strolled up into it. And, like, I was waiting for him to morph into a dragon or anything. And yeah, so Taron Lannister is the villain. Let's spin it again. It has landed on Instagram takedowns. Okay, this is a very specific kind of Instagram takedown that I would like to talk about. I would also like to say for the record, Sissy,

that my second choice tonight was people who are too close to their cousins. I think it's weird, and I think everybody, if you're friends with your cousins, get out of here. Go and talk to somebody. What happened? But there is an epidemic in my feeds recently of traditionally attractive, white, mass-presenting gay men who post a shirtless selfie of themselves.

Already, we're like, okay, we get that's what Instagram is. But then in the comments, in the caption, using like poorly constructed satire as though I'm not just posting a picture of myself shirtless. I'm making fun of the people who post pictures of themselves shirtless. And therefore, I am somehow better than those idiots because I am not doing that, but I am doing that. And here's what I have to say to those people.

We will never dismantle the master's house with the master's tools, okay? So for you trying to use the very medium that is perpetuating all of these toxic ideas of what a body should look like and using your body that looks exactly like what we all want our bodies to look like and then trying to inception us into thinking that you're actually very woke for posting this shirtless pic is ridiculous. I'm sorry. I have an incredible body and I post about it every day and I post

about it captionless because it doesn't need a caption. My abs speak for themselves. And then secondarily, I also, I just have to say, we got to stop posting our tweets on Instagram, okay? We simply must stop posting the tweets to Instagram. It does feel like you're using the same homework assignment for two different classes, okay? And that is not the assignment, all right?

We don't want to read when we go to that website. And that's all I have to say. Yes, I think that's a very important point. I go to Instagram to feel bad about what I do after work. That's why I go to Instagram. I go to Instagram to see, God, people take a lot of vacations. Amazing vacations. I don't know, I'm tired. End of, God, people take a lot of vacations. Amazing vacations.

I don't know, I'm tired. End of the day, people making pottery. I'm tired. I sit on my couch. Do you want to come to Mykonos with me? Let's go to Mykonos.

No! I actually have a bunch of money that I was gonna use for, you know what, it doesn't even matter what I was gonna use it for. Let's go to Mykonos. Let's end on a high note.

Rebecca Tracer wrote a really great piece in the cut, and it was about how much we don't know and about this idea of electability and the idea of what polling teaches us in this age of data and really how much certainty we're all looking for. And she makes a really eloquent argument against a lot of assumptions that are going into this electability conversation. And the point that she makes, which is something that I'm

noticing, is a lot of people have their heart candidate, and then they kind of have their mind candidate. And I think we all do that a bit. And I think we probably shouldn't, in part because I don't think either one is particularly reliable. And I don't think our mind candidate is based on better information than our heart candidates. And I think that's true, not just for how we're choosing a candidate, but even about how we're thinking about issues like impeachment. It is a scary moment, because I do think there's this gut feeling like we don't know necessarily how to win. We're not totally sure about how to win. And in a moment of crisis, sometimes we look around to wait for someone else to tell us what to do, but nobody knows. So everybody just freezes.

And sometimes I think we're getting a little bit frozen. And that article by Rebecca Traister, which I think everybody should read, is a reminder to not fall into that trap, that we all can know what we want. And when we come together and choose the candidate we like by giving them the most votes, getting the most votes is how they'll prove they're the person who can get the most fucking votes. So I don't know how you guys feel, but this does feel like a strange moment where we're tired. It doesn't feel like we're really in the final rush of trying to replace Donald Trump. There have been these horrible anti-choice measures passing across the country. We've been losing these battles to keep judges off the court. Donald Trump seems to have been

successfully able to stymie Congress right now. Even though this is a hard moment, I do think it's worth remembering that we're not crazy. We're okay to be sad. We're okay to feel exhausted. It's going to be a long fight. Don't forget that the media is going to try to make you choose like a pundit, but you can also choose like a voter.'s all okay let's end the show i want to thank this fantastic panel i want to thank norbeza flint megan gailey joel kim booster nancy flores thank you all for coming out and have a great night Thank you.