Lovett or Leave It - Looking for Delicate Give (Rantathon!)

Episode Date: August 21, 2021

Rants are the only thing on the menu this week — from newbies Alex English and Danny Pellegrino, plus familiar faces Guy Branum, Emily Heller, Erin Ryan, Megan Gailey, Josh Gondelman, and Danielle Perez. From white celebrities to White Lotus (SPOILERS!), celebrating birthdays but not Meg Ryan, love on islands but not on Netflix, and more. Lots to complain about. Spin the wheel.For a closed-captioned version of this episode, please visit crooked.com/lovettorleaveit. For a transcript of this episode, please email [e-mail] and include the name of the podcast.

Welcome to the first annual Love It or Leave It Rantathon. This is a very special episode of Rants and Only Rants that we recorded with some of our favorite people for two reasons. One, we knew you'd just love it. And two, we wanted to go on vacation. You know this show is nothing if not easy, breezy, and deeply calming, but if you can't get away from it all, then at least you can get into it all. That's right, this week's episode is just glass

after glass of frosty, refreshing rant wheel. We're here to scream and shout and let it all out with our guests, who've been shook up harder than the 5,000 hard seltzers I've had this summer so far. Why are they all so terrible? The seltzers, not the guests. The guests are delicious and refreshing.

Attention, Love It or Leave It listeners in the New York tri-state area and people who can fucking travel. Love It or Leave It is coming to the New York Comedy Festival on November 12th at the Beacon Theater. Tickets go on sale starting August 23rd. For more information

and links to tickets, head to crooked.com slash events. I am so excited. I can't wait to see you there. It's Vaxxed only. So any of you fucking anti-vaxxers that are somehow listening to this show, you're not welcome. Also, Take Line host Jason Concepcion and Crooked are coming at you with a brand new podcast, X-Ray Vision. Each week, Jason will dive deep into your favorite films, TV shows, and comics, including Shang-Chi, The Legend of the Ten Rings, and Why the Last Man. The X-Ray Vision trailer is out now, and the first episode drops on August 30th. Subscribe to X-Ray Vision on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

I have heard the trailer. I have heard the first episodes. They are fantastic. You are going to love this show. Subscribe to X-Ray Vision right fucking now. Do it. This week on The Wheel, we have white celebs who don't bathe. We have defending Andrew and Quiz Cuomo because Republicans have done worse. We have a lack of appreciation for Meg Ryan. We have White Lotus, really more of a rave on White Lotus. We have malice at the palace. We have adult birthday parties, Island TV and Jamie Spears stepping down,

plus a rant about sequels that destroy the stakes of the original film. Very specific. It has landed on defending Andrew and Chris Cuomo because Republicans have done worse, suggested by Josh Gondelman. Josh, over to you. Thank you. So this week, Andrew Cuomo finally resigned as governor of New York, which is kind of surprising, both in the fact that he stepped down at all and the fact that it was a massive

Cuomo failure that he didn't publish a book about how he overcame it while he was in the middle of failing at it. He tried to defend himself last week by saying his inappropriate touching was just because he's Italian, which is a very weird defense. You don't like to see someone cite an unsavory stereotype about their heritage as a defense from a crime, potentially. It's like if Bernie Madoff had said, look, I know this looks bad, but to prosecute me for financial crimes is basically anti-Semitic because that is my culture. Cuomo resigned effective two weeks from his

announcement. Watch him take all his sick days in a row now. I know your tricks. Not to mention his brother, who was happy to interview him when he was pretending he had defeated the coronavirus, stopped having him on the air around the time he trotted out the defense that his meat balls are just naturally spicy and you need to get over it, people, because he does it to everyone. I tweeted about this because I don't value my psychological well-being. And I read the replies because I don't value my time. And there's this strain of reply that's like, oh, so you don't care about Donald Trump's

kids and their conflict of interest? And it's like, you think I like Donald Trump's kids and their conflict of interest. And it's like, you think I like Donald Trump's kids? I would love nothing more than to watch Donald Jr. and Eric concuss themselves while running into each other at full speed, trying to turn into a big, strong robot like the Power Rangers. But there's also this more sinister kind of reply that implies you should give Andrew and Chris Cuomo a pass because they're on like the right side of things. Otherwise, like they play for the right team.

And if I were a journalist, I would provide you examples of these kind of tweets. And as a lazy comedian with no professional standards to adhere to, I simply welcome you to search Cuomo shouldn't resign on Twitter and shudder. First of all, we can't just throw people who are harassed and mistreated to the wolves. That's not only discriminatory, cruel, and callous, but it's actually Greg Abbott's proposed penalty for women who have abortions, throwing them to literal wolves. Fortunately, because Texas doesn't have state income tax, the budget couldn't support his proposal for a publicly funded wolf pit. But that's – I'm off topic. Second of all, we can't hold up Republicans like Donald Trump and Matt Gaetz as examples of how allegations should be handled, right? Oh,

they didn't have to step down. Our guy doesn't have to step down. The entire premise of the Republican party is that bad people should never have to face negative consequences. That animates their entire voting base. And look, I get the idea of supporting someone on quote unquote your team because they make other people mad. I'm a Boston sports fan. It's what I live for. But that ethos can't allow for sexual harassment. Colin Cuomo, one of our guys or whatever, because he's a Democrat, is like continuing to cheer for OJ Simpson in 2021 because you love the Buffalo Bills. And much like being a Buffalo Bills fan, rooting for a political party that makes bad decisions and doesn't make things better for the people they represent should feel at least a little embarrassing.

Politicians need to be held accountable for their conduct, as well as their actual policy positions, regardless of their party affiliation. And if you're that jealous of Republicans for getting to support gross people, I don't know, watch Annie Hall. At least you get to enjoy a terrific Diane Keaton performance. And if you really love Andrew Cuomo that much, I'm sure he's getting ready to write a new book about how to deal with professional criticism in a thoughtful and dignified manner, just like he didn't. Josh Gottelman. Incredible. A couple follow up.

Please. Points, questions. One, what have you lived your whole life in the voice you do to represent it was not just a different tone it was a different person maybe from a different part of the country it was an entirely different man and i do think you could live as that man and let us know how that goes wait which one it was the voice that's like uh uh well he shouldn't result you went a little i try honestly i try to mix up my dumb guy voice because i don't like to stereotype any one group of people as the dumb guy because i feel like people i think from the south have brought up

like the southern accent was a punching bag for too long as just, like, dumb guy. I do a Boston accent a lot of time as dumb guy, but I don't like that as an exclusive representation. I feel like that's bad for the Bostonians, and I try to represent for them holistically and not just dumbly. Yeah, they contain multitudes. This was, like, a Cuomo-esque voice. Cuomo shouldn't resign. It was, like, borderline Italian. Like, is it offensive?

Maybe. But it's borderline. It's like borderline Italian. Like, is it offensive? Maybe. But it's borderline. It's borderline. I will say, this is unrelated. I realized I couldn't do a Bernie Sanders impression. But I discovered I could try to do James Adomian doing Bernie Sanders. Oh, sure. And I could get closer.

And it's the 1%, the 2%, the 1%. I can't go deep enough because I'm a small gay man. James Adomian's impressions are so amazing. I feel like with Bernie, there are so many people that you can do like the SNL, not like a specific SNL impression, but like you do the SNL-ization of it where you're just kind of like you're taking a little of the cadence. You're taking a little of the inflection. And it's like people get it. I'm not playing Bernie sanders on tv so i can just go like this and people understand and you're like is that larry david it's like yeah i mean it's more like it's closer to larry david but i'm saying bernie sanders stuff because it'll keep back in the throat

because he don't mean it is it's very far back in the throat i do like that this podcast also now includes acting exercises. Another point I wanted to make about what you said on the Chris Cuomo of it all. It does seem to me that like now the conversation is like, what does Chris Cuomo do? And it's sort of like beside the point because it's like journalists are allowed to have creepy brothers. That's like completely allowed. They're allowed to have super famous, super powerful, creepy brothers. And at this point, that's what he's got. And so it just seems like I don't cover my famous, powerful, creepy brother, but I'm still a journalist. And by the way,

I still talk and advise my brother because he's my brother and his family. I do that in my personal capacity. I really think the issue people are having is more, hey, wait a second. You weren't doing good journalism before. You were joking around with him when you felt good about when it was popular, when it was popular, when it seemed cool and popular, when people were like Trump is handling this badly and this guy is saying at least some of the right things. And he hates Trump. And we like when he's on CNN was how some people felt. And I do feel like him not saying anything now would be so much less glaring if he had like, well, CNN doesn't want him to talk about it because there's a conflict of interest.

You go, OK, but like it was not a conflict of interest before. It either is or it isn't. And so that's what's a bummer to me. It's a conflict of interest in that he's not interested in doing it. I also do think that there's this like pernicious thing around people like Andrew Cuomo, which is that like, it's very much like allowing kind of Trumpian notions to kind of infect you when they're like, well, you know, because he fights, he's tough, you know, yeah. like we shouldn't throw away our own because he's a fighter and he's really tough. And like, that's good. We need that in our governing. And it's like, I completely agree, especially early on in the pandemic. Andrew Cuomo was a far better

communicator than Donald Trump. And that had legitimate value. There was legitimate value. Don't think you should have written a book about it. Absolutely. Don't think you should have done that. That was a real, a real mission accomplished banner of a book. But this idea that because Cuomo is so feisty, such a fighter, never gives up, fights everybody that that makes him a great governor. Like New York was one of the slowest, continues to be one of the slowest in distributing rent stabilization funds. The relationship between the state and the city of New York is a fucking mess. New York has a huge amount of problems. He's done so many corrupt things at the state level, like this fake idea that like when you have a real tough guy who intimidates his opponents and really fight like you're going to end up with better governing.

It's just bullshit. I fully agree. Not saying he's never done or said anything right in his life, but it's just like, yeah, even people who are like real monsters aren't monsters 100% of the time. You know what I mean? I think that's what you forget. It's like when you want your politicians to be as effective and accountable as possible as much as possible. And I certainly don't think he's at that threshold, right? Like, it's not like you don't get to coast on one good thing he you know we uh not we i wasn't didn't vote on this but he was given an emmy for that like they literally were like here's an emmy for being on tv it's like yeah that's the reward for him being on tv and being

a good communicator occasionally the reward is not you get to weather these legitimate, troubling harassment and abuse allegations. Fox News had a chyron and, you know, look, a broken evil fucking clock. And the chyron was Cuomo. I'm not a pervert. I'm Italian. I mean, that was basically what he said, right? Like he didn't say Italian.

He was like, it's my culture to touch people. And then he had that slideshow. Which has nothing to, like, it's like, you should apologize for these things. What the report actually says, which is it's a culture of fear and intimidation and harassment. Yes. That was manifest everywhere. Everywhere. And I think when you, sometimes when you criticize something like

this behavior, right, this culture of fear, even the handsiness, right? There are people who who might not know who I am. If I say, you know, tweet something about that or like say something publicly who might be like, oh, a Republican looking to take down this guy or like Republicans will always come out with like, oh, Bill Gates was friends with Jeffrey Epstein. And my friend Daniel Kevelsmith kind of raised this point on Twitter yesterday of like, you think Bill Clinton is my friend? Like, you know what I mean? Like, I think people should be held accountable for their actions. Like, oh, Bill Gates was on the Lolita Express.

It's like, I'm not going to defend Bill Gates. Somebody did that to me once like somebody i would like was talking about you know something in this vein and then somebody said where were you when bill clinton was failing in bosnia it's like i was in sixth grade yeah i didn't do enough you're right i didn't do enough silence was deafening i should have done more and i'm sorry i was watching Simpsons reruns and not doing my homework. I was finding out what schist

is. Right. I was learning all the stuff I never think about. That's what I was doing back in 1999. I was getting to the bottom of the Krebs cycle. I knew so much about photosynthesis. I feel like life is just cycles of learning stuff that in 10 years you never think about, right?

Absolutely. Like how to fix a printer. Josh Gondelman, thank you so much. Thank you for having me, John. Great to see you. It has landed on White Celebs Who Don't bathe, suggested by Alex English. Take it away. We're at a turning point in our society right now, in our communities.

Far be it for me to ever exploit the divisions that exist in our communities. That's not what you would do. That's something I would never do. our communities. That's not what you would do. That's something I would never do. However, I believe it was my friend, the great Sam Jay, who once said, white people are aliens. You know, I won't say the joke verbatim. I will let you go and watch that on your own time. But you know, there's a very critical deconstruction of the white community that a lot of your behaviors just really add up and it makes it grounds for a sound argument. I'll leave it at that. That being my first point.

First of all, live how you live. I'm all about free will. Everybody should really just be allowed to do whatever you want. Let your freak flag fly. But do we need to know is always the first question. I don't think that was information that's very useful or pertinent to moving the culture forward. But since we're talking about it, here we are. listening to these stories from these public figures describing their lack of bathing rituals and many of us those of us who have had the pleasure of being in your presence during school and the pleasure of being in your presence in other like arenas we knew that already we knew that we just don't do the same thing in the bathroom, you know, but for now to it be like, especially when it starts to rain, you know, and we're just like, okay, there's always, I'm not even going to say,

I'm not even going to repeat. Right. Because I don't exploit division. You don't. And that's how many people know about you. Yes. I'm not going to repeat the animal that we say, or I may claim that you share an odor with. You're going to have to look that up on your own. And speaking of research, speaking of looking up, it is truly baffling. The lack of study done on this specific topic. I googled this and not much out there. And I believe the fact that it's the reason why there are no peer reviewed scholarly articles on this done is that nobody wants to get close enough of these people to even have an interview or to poll them.

It's also hard to do a double-blind study because you know the difference. You can tell. It's very difficult, and I'm not coming into this insensitive. No, you're not. You have these public figures. These are people who have a lot of money. They have very large, copious amounts of real estate. So one could say that there's approximately,

what, six to seven bathrooms in said homes. So what, that makes several bathing apparatuses that are not being used. So it somewhat lands on the insensitive side. There are plenty of people out there who would love a hot shower and the privilege of not being able to take one just because you don't think you are offending anyone with your odor is wild. I actually had a friend, I discussed this with a white friend of mine and I said, what's going on here? Is this normal behavior? And he said, yes. Now, did I know I had a white friend out here who wasn't bathing daily? I did not know that. That was news. He said he does not smell when he goes days without it. And I was like, huh. And this is another theory. Now, this might teeter over into conspiracy theory land for a second. But I'm just going to like, you know, I'm no Alex Jones. I'm Alex English. Let's make that clear. Okay. Alex, no matter how many days it goes, you know, I let it get to a certain point, but I just don't.

I smell myself and I don't smell. And I think, well, white people were the origin of COVID, obviously. Like, were white people, how long have y'all had this? Okay, listen, listen. I just, you know, I'm not making a declarative statement. I'm just doing- No, you're asking questions. You're just asking questions. You're asking the hard questions. Somebody has to ask these questions. You look online. Nobody is doing the hard work. People are afraid to ask some of these hard questions. I just want to make two quick points.

Point number one, I've always felt like there were two kinds of people. There are people who can have a full day of life. They can wake up in the morning and they can ideally shower and they can put on their nice clothes and they can have a full day of life. They can wake up in the morning and they can ideally shower and they can put on their nice clothes and they can have a full day of living. Their great life of like they meet somebody for coffee, then they go to work, then they have a meeting, then they have drinks after work, then a dinner, then they go to some sort of art show.

And at the end of that time, like an art show, and they look perfectly put together. Like they look like they just put on their fresh coat of makeup. They look just out of the shower, just perfectly put together, clean and neat and tidy and not shiny. And then there are people like me where I shower, I get dressed, I put on my clothes, I get to the office and I look disgusting. I've already fallen apart. I feel like I need to tidy up. Like I look like I just finished running a marathon every time I go between my car and another indoor space. OK, so this has never made any sense to me.

And I feel as though what I want to do is have a space where I can find a place at work. We're back at the office to shower three, four, five, seven times a day. When I worked on a show called The Newsroom, a perfect show on HBO with no issues whatsoever, Aaron Sorkin installed in his office a shower because he thought he thought better in the shower so that he could go and shower in his office. And I thought that was pretty cool. And the opposite end of the spectrum. You know could go and shower in his office. And I thought that was pretty cool. And the opposite end of the spectrum, you know what I mean? Yes. Yes. Which lends itself really to if most white people would start regularly bathing, maybe they'd be less racist. You know, maybe they'd have time to. He said showers lend thought. You go into a shower and, you know, it's not even sometimes it's not even about getting clean.

It's just about let me get some of these prejudices out of my head. Yeah. A different sort of maybe I shouldn't wear blackface. You know, maybe calling the police is a bad idea. And black people, you know, you that is a time to think. I agree with that 100 percent vehemently. Absolutely. This is a call to action. It is. It is.. Absolutely. This is a call to action.

It is. It is. It is. It's a call to arms. A call to washing our arms. It's a call to arms. It's a call to legs. That is truly where this conversation began.

You know, those conversations were very, I mean, that was a rough, I'm going to tell you, that was a very rough period for African-American people who enjoy the company of white people. Because I like to think that I'm a black person with discernment and I can pick out the white people who I need in my life, who I can smell in my life. And it's just I feel very tricked. I feel and what's happening now, white people are coming out of the closet as anti-bathers. now, white people are coming out of the closet as anti-bathers. And I'm usually not a fan of shame, but I think we got to bring shame into this because I just can't. I can't. I can't.

I can't have that around me. I do think that some people did find when we did have a bit of a discourse about how a lot of people were letting gravity do most of the cleaning of their legs, just sort of putting a lot of that work on gravity's shoulders. It did open the door for a larger and more surprising conversation. You made all this money and acquired all of this, you know, success and access. Keep it together. Keep it together.

Keep it together. I hate to be this guy, but, you know, it's going to be to a point now where I'm going to if I'm like if you if you are one of my white companions, you know, like people that I listen, you're going to have to have two things. Proof of vaccination and truth of lab duration. That's going to that's going to have to be like pictures, videos. I won't leak anything. This is this is not going to be revenge porn. Absolutely. I just need to know that you're in there getting up there. A covid passport, a dove passport.

Because here's what's going to happen. Okay, friend, this is going to happen. Someone's going to hear what I just said, the latheration part and think that I just think that that's a word. That's not a word. In fact, when I did write that down on this notebook in front of me, I in fact, latheration is actually slang for two people who participate in oral sex. That's basically, it's slang for that. I will say, I won't mind that being proof. I won't mind that being served as proof. I'm willing to show, show me whatever it is that you would like to show me.

I'm lending itself to open interpretation. You're not looking to create some huge bureaucracy. You're flexible. You're not like the big government. Yeah. You just want answers. You want answers and you want safety. Send me the video of the oral sex and then also send me what came after, which I would hope would be the shower. Because that's also a big part of me that I'm looking for.

I do think that this became a little bit more about what you need. And I think that that's okay. Alex English, thank you so much. Thank you. That was great. Thank you so much. Thank you. That was great. Thank you. It has landed on Jamie Spears. Here to rant about it, Danielle Perez.

Jamie Spears is finally stepping down as conservator of Britney Spears' estate. All it took was 13 years, countless exposés, bipartisan support, and two women with a podcast. I am so happy that this day has finally come. Matthew Rosengart, Britney's new attorney, she came to work, bitch, okay? Her response to Jamie stepping down is truly incredible, and I really need to, like, speak it so that you all can hear this he said we look forward to continuing our vigorous investigation into the conduct of mr spears and others over the past 13 years while he reaped millions of dollars from his daughter's estate and i look forward to taking mr spears sworn deposition in the near future babe you're going to jail. Jamie, you are going to jail. Get ready to calculate all of Britney's IP

because you are going to jail. Sang Ingham, Lou Taylor, Judge Penny. Honey, the Britney army is coming for you. We know you're not that innocent. We know you're not that innocent and we are activated. This is only the beginning. Honey, free Britney.

Now it's justice for Britney. Okay, today podcast one. All right. And I feel like this was Marc Maron's dream when he started WTF. All right. Let's not make him the like. All right. This is why we should defund the police.

This is why. Defund the police. Just give women in the la comedy scene spotify deals they're gonna solve all the i feel as though this you have an ulterior motive here i think i don't know i don't know i don't know if this is on the level i don't know if this is on the level i thought something like uh because uh ronan farrow and gia tolentino wrote a great piece about this for the new yorker uh and it came came out right when Ronan and I were in Provincetown over July 4th. And just so you know, publishing a piece about freeing Britney Spears right before you head to like the gay capital of the East Coast over July 4th.

Gay Mecca. He was wandering through the streets like a Vita Peron. Like it was like. The sea was parting. Ronan was here. It's like you came to free Britney. They're like, what can we do? Can we write to Congress?

He's like, actually, yes, you should. You should always be writing to Congress. It's one thing both sides can agree on, free Britney. It is true. It has united the left and right because it's so obscene. The fact that the conservatorship through Jamie Spears was paying a huge bill for crisis communications to protect Jamie Spears from his own daughter's allegations, I think to me captured was that like kind of the molten hot core of why this is so disgusting. Yes. So I completely agree.

Free Britney. Free Britney. Free Britney. I will say now that she has a better lawyer and Jamie Spears is gone, maybe this group of people focusing on freeing this one rich woman could maybe find another place to point it because it's so effective. You know, I think the thing I don't want to say stop. I mean, Kendra, I don't you seem to look away with horror like I'm about to get murdered by the Free Britney Army. Listen, you find you have no greater champion than me. All right. For your work. All right. Ronan did Good Morning America from Provincetown in the middle of our vacation at seven in the morning. I am part of this fight and I have done the work. So you sacrificed for it. You did. And so I'm all on board. But let's now take this incredible energy, keep a little bit of it on Brittany, making sure that's moving forward and then pointed at all the other people that are being abused by this ridiculous system. And the other people being told that their disability means they have no agency in their lives.

In many cases, for reasons that I think are, at the very least, like, questionable. Yeah, the probate court system needs an overhaul. And the Free Britney movement is behind that. They are activated. They're on the case. They're on the fucking case. Podcasts are on the case podcasts are on the case look out evildoers uh because people have microphones now you know we got microphones we're solving cases we have a love for our pop stars enough to start podcasts about their instagrams that lead to investigative journalistic pieces.

Danielle Perez, everybody. This is 2021. It's 2021. All right, Jamie. Time's up. If we can say that anymore. We can even say that. I think this is like the one time where it works.

Danielle Perez, thank you so much. Thank you. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. It has landed on Malice at the Palace. Here to rant is Megan Gailey. I sent seven options because I am fired up this week. And the one that really connected with my heart, my soul, there is a brand new documentary.

It's called Untold. It's a series on Netflix. I cannot vouch for any of them except for the one that follows the Malice at the Palace. The Malice at the Palace. The Malice at the Palace. malice at the palace the malice at the palace yes that is a fight at a basketball game that happened in 2004 so why am i so upset about it now because new footage is released in this documentary that we never saw and it's so relevant to all the bullshit that's happening now there are dumbass police officers like truly they could run into each other and

and not like like clown music should have been playing the entire time these knuckleheads were on there is horrific treatment of the media towards black men there are unexplainable standards that we have set for professional athletes that we refuse to take on to ourselves very simone biles there is just anger and vitriol from the public directed at black men that they do not understand and do not care to have any empathy for and it's some of the worst behaved white people i've ever seen like it is it's the prequel to to January 6th is what is happening at the Palace. Wow. In 2004. Wow.

I see what you mean. Yeah. That just blew my mind. A prequel. It's fucked up, John. It's fucked up. I'm going to watch this documentary. You absolutely should.

Just one other, this was something else I was mad about. Major League Baseball is thinking about entering into a deal with Barstool Sports. Do not do it. That is bad. That is a terrible, terrible idea. Baseball needs to go, hey, actually, maybe less racism, not more racism. Go in the direction of Fernando Tatis Jr. Get away from Dave Portnoy.

Do not look at him. Do not look at his bank account. Do not even look at a stool you would sit on. Look at Fernando Tatis Jr. and him stirring and him eating the cereal and follow that direction. Away from the white light towards the bright light. Toward the bright light. Cereal. Toward the cereal.

So that was two rants for the price of one. And steal it twice the price. Thank you. Megan Gailey, everybody. Malice at the Palace. I like the phrase. I twice the price. Thank you. Megan Gailey, everybody. Malice at the Palace. I like the phrase. I like the phrase. Oh, it's an incredible name.

I think that's why it has lasted so long. Great branding. So what happened? Somebody threw something? A man threw something. He is featured in the documentary. He, to this day, thinks he did nothing wrong. And that he is the victim.

There's an amazing prosecutor that will restore your faith in our justice system. I don't want that. Well, like for one day. You know, like, you'll go, oh my God, that guy's good

and then you'll read literally anything else and go, oh, okay, it was just him. Ron Artest. Yeah, Ron Artest, Metta World Peace. Oh.

Yeah, that's the same guy. Same person. Same guy. Same person. Yeah, he had a rap album. We get into it. It gets into it. You get into it.

You get into it. You're going to get it all. I'm excited. I'm loving these images from 2004 world. Yeah. It's starting to be a different time, 2004. It's starting to look like the past. Yeah.

You know that happens how all of a sudden something 15 years is about 16 years, right? That's when something becomes the past, you know? But then you're like, oh, my God. Because I'm like, oh, my God, I was so young when that happened. And I was a freshman in college. I was a full-grown adult. So just walk us through very briefly. So what is the Malice of the Palace?

So Metta World Peace, tell us what happened. So there's a game they're playing. Yeah, it's a regular season game. It's like November. November. It doesn't matter, but it mattered to them because they were rivals at the time. Who was rivals? The Pacers and the Detroit Pistons.

And where are we right now? We're in Detroit. Where is this taking place? We're in Detroit. We're in Detroit. And the Pacers are from where? Indianapolis. Indianapolis and Detroit rivals classic Midwestern rivalry where we have the Detroit Pistons

versus the Indianapolis Pacers. Indiana Pacers, yeah. The Indiana, obviously the Indiana Pacers. And they're duking it out in the court. Yes. And so the game was actually kind of like a blowout. The Pacers were ahead by a lot. And then Ron Artest fouled.

Like he did a hard foul on this guy named Ben Wallace, who unbeknownst to him, his brother had just died. So Ben Wallace gets up, you know, physically upset and they start fighting. Ron Artest and Ben Wallace start fighting in the classic NBA way that is like no one really wants to fight. But I want you to know that like what you did sucked. So is there pushing? Is this pushing? We're talking about pushing.

We're talking about pushing. Okay. So we're pushing. We're angry. We're pushing. No one's throwing hard punches. No. Because you can't do that.

And they maybe want to, but they're actually like friends. They don't want to do that. Because you can't look like you're walking away from the mistreatment, but you don't want to get into a true row, a real Donnybrook. Not really. And so at that time, Ron Artest was in anger management. And you see him remove himself from the situation. He goes to lay on the scorer's table.

And you can physically feel him counting to five. And you can physically feel him counting to five. And at about four and a half, a slow motion full beer comes in from the stands and nails him. Where did he get hit? All over. I mean, he got hit. And then it's immediate. He is up.

He is in the stands. And he punches the wrong white man. No heroes in this story, ultimately. But everybody has taken blame. Everyone has taken responsibility except for the cup thrower and then a man who comes down onto the court and tries to punch basketball. Like Detroit fans that were involved have not taken any responsibility. And why would they? Based on the footage

if they had not gotten the players out of there they would have killed them. Wow. Yeah. Wow. But then the news called them all thugs

of course. The players not the fans. Malice at the Palace. Malice at the Palace. Malice at the Palace. Malice at the Palace. Megan Gailey everybody.

Thank you so much. That was so fun. Thank you for, everybody. Thank you so much. That was so fun. Thank you for being here. Thank you. Yeah. It has landed on White Lotus. He puts the super in Provincetown Super Spreader. Everybody, Guy Branum.

Good to be here. Good to be here. Yes. Last time John and I saw each other was in Provincetown and you and Ronan managed to avoid the breakthrough Delta. Yeah. I and so many others managed to be part of, you know, another chapter in gay public health emergencies.

Well, it's good to see you sound good. You look good. I'm feeling great, you know. How's your sense of smell? My sense of smell is back. I was real whiny. Like, John was very, very, like, kind and responsible about, like, checking in on me. And I was very whiny about the possible loss

of sense of smell and taste. But it's back. It's back. How nice. You know, those subtle distinctions between ginger and galanga, this schnoz can do it. Wow. That's

good. Good. I'm glad that those are the things that you were most worried about. I don't know why, but somehow even those flavor choices are gay. You chose gay. I don't know how that's possible. Well, Guy, you're here to rant. What are you going to rant about? The options are White Lotus, heat, breakthrough COVID, me looking at people's Instagrams, Instagram gunkles,

all-inclusive resorts, and peach season. John, it's peach season. It's August. No, I don't want to hear about peaches. No, John, John. Yes. Like, I am a child of California's Central Valley, which produces, my county produces more peaches than the states of Georgia and South Carolina combined.

Really? And this is our golden hour. I didn't know that. But fine, you don't want to hear about it. It seems like I did hear about it. How much more did you have? Did you say the movie heat or heat? Like the temperature.

Just the temperature. White Lotus. I choose White Lotus. I'm just thrilled that we are all examining the fact that literally all of our vacations are colonial endeavors. White Lotus. I choose White Lotus. being reminded that they are fundamentally exploitative endeavors where white people like demand that a place where we did not evolve um provide us with uh pools and drinks it's thrilling it's exciting it makes you feel so bad like there is the terrible way that you watch something like that and it's like are we doing anything productive by just holding up a mirror and pointing out how disgusting we are?

Are we perhaps just being a little bit thrilled and excited by how, like, privileged and disgusting we are to be able to indulge in these things? I don't know, but it's really good. Connie Britton, what can't she do? And also, Mike White. Why I love Mike White. Three reasons I love Mike White. A, keeps Molly Shannon employed. And keeps Molly Shannon doing things.

Like, we all know Molly Shannon can play Jack Donaghy's sister in her sleep. But Molly Shannon as, like, society maven? Hello? Yes. B, fucking AIDS plotline and no one wearing safe hands. Like, when you find out that Steve's on, spoiler alert, if you haven't watched episode three of White Lotus, an HIV AIDS plot line

where you know it's going to be dealt with in a way that is humane and responsible. And three, nobody understands that there's nothing scarier than a judgmental 20 year old girl, like a middle-aged gay man. Like truly understanding, you can have all of your zombies,

you can have all of your superhero bad guys, none of them are scary, but scary is a girl who has decided that you're doing it wrong. Completely agree. Love White Lotus. Not going to prevent me from taking vacations in any way whatsoever.

I do like that there's a kind of national conversation about being a good customer, which it's like kind of a new thing. Like there really is like we're talking about the ways to be a customer and like in ways that we haven't before. And I really a friend of mine and I were texting about White Lotus. Everyone's fans, huge fans. And then we were trying to debate whether rich people are on the nose. You know what I mean?

Like the conversations about privilege and the white son and not having advantages. All of that is very like of the moment and like on the nose because those conversations happen and are so on the fucking nose. because those conversations happen and are so on the fucking nose. It felt so like, what happens when this rich family is in their safe space is so funny to me. What was really delightful is I got to go up to Northern California where my niece is 20 years old, being raised by my mom who's on a fixed income. Definitely not somebody who goes on fancy vacations like that. definitely not somebody who goes on fancy vacations like that um she was so judgmental of the newlywed girl judging her husband for being pissed off about the suite she was like he paid for it you should fight with them

that's so funny do you want another toilet it's incredible and i want to apologize because i i do need to say in the first episode i didn't know what kind of world i was in all right and i didn't know if i was going to want to stay there yes and now i know i love the white lotus all right i'm in i'm very excited that they're going to have a second season with new characters but what also fascinates me is like succession sort of gave us a new like paradigm for an hour long comedy and White Lotus I'm just so satisfied that it's a similar energy but with punch lines like it's not all just the actors acting through awkwardness it's very regularly funny I also liked that the show tears apart everyone like it doesn't give you the nice safety of,

oh, but the poor people who work at the hotel are fine too. You're also exploring the power dynamics within their relationships and the way that people are using, you know, he's sexually harassing those around him. It's fun and interesting. Now that it's saying everyone is equally bad, that nice lady who had her baby on the first episode, she's gotten out relatively clean.

I also like that Lucas Gage went from his audition mishap where he was being insulted by some director. Remember that when he did an audition? No. No, so Lucas Gage does this audition and then the director is caught on the zoom saying like oh my god look at this guy's apartment how does he live like this oh god which was bullshit for so many reasons not least of which like the apartment looked fine like was this like a tv near the kitchen oh my god is this a studio like that was sort of the energy and then he was like yes my

apartment sucked give me this job and he handled it really well and he played it off. I don't think he did book that role, but he's here. The white Lotus. All right. Getting sexually harassed on the show by the guy from looking. I think it's important for us to realize that things like classist condescension, which we were maybe acculturated to think of as playful fun, are not. not you know as we're having all of these conversations about so many things shitting on people because they're poorer than you are or because they're poorer than you expect people to be isn't a fun game yeah white lotus also we still got that last episode and whatever the fuck is

going on between natasha rothwell and um stifler's mom like i still don't understand and i'm fascinated and worried about that but john what have you done to avail yourself of peach season Stifler's mom, like I still don't understand and am fascinated. I'm worried about that. But John, what have you done to avail yourself of peach season? Like, what have you done to say, like, there's only so much August. I found out two things from you today. A couple of things beyond the white lotus. I found out that it is peach season. And I found out that California produces more peaches than Georgia, which I actually think

is a real testament to the branding of Georgia, because I did not know that. I did not know that about California. California so far and away outproduces peaches compared to Georgia and South Carolina that, as I said, my home county, Sutter County, which, you know, could really rival South Carolina and Georgia when it comes to other factors. Sutter County outproduces the entire state of Georgia and the entire state of South Carolina combined when it comes to other factors. Sutter County outproduces the entire state of Georgia and the entire state of South Carolina combined when it comes to peaches. So, John, just feel and you're looking for delicate give. You're just looking for delicate give and you'll know she's ready for you. Thank you for believing that I'm going to buy peaches, like that I'm going to go to a market of some kind and pick up peaches and examine them

and decide which peach is right for me. But John, like I've never done that. How else are you going to get in a conversation with a woman in her early 70s? She'll tell you about how hot it is. She'll tell you about how expensive the peaches are. I literally going to make a little note to bring this up in therapy. Why won't I buy fruit? Like, what is it that I think is going to go wrong? Like, you'll never eat it. You'll forget. It'll go bad. I have this ongoing conversation with Ari Shapiro of NPR and a garden in his home.

And he's always so busy and he's singing in concerts and he's making public radio. Mentioning in passing, oh, the pears I grew into this jar to make a pear juice or like a liquor or something. Like, yes, he's operating on such a fucking high, exquisite level of gardening. All I'm trying to say, guy, is if I encounter a peach in August, it will be in a pie. That's what I was trying to tell you. OK, it has to be in a pie. Well, you have a beautiful garden and you live in California now, so you need to get in touch with nature. And also in August, it's too fucking hot in California to make a pie. You've got to make a cobbler. Cobbler. And you're saying, I don't have a simple cobbler recipe. And

I would say, yes, you do, John, in my book. It's in a footnote in one of the later chapters. It's my grandma Branham's's it's the one thing from grandma branham that my mom appreciated and it's a very solid recipe i didn't realize guy branham's book my life as a goddess which is available now wherever books are sold wherever books are sold is also a cookbook it's also a cookbook there's also instructions for prepping a possum i don't give you a full recipe for a possum, but I just tell you how to get a possum to the place you need to start cooking. We're recording all this, right?

We've been recording. This wasn't weird. We're rolling. Thank you so much, Guy. Wait, I'm going to do a rant at you because I need to do something. All right. It has landed on sequels that spoil the stakes of the original film. What do I mean by that? What I mean by that is when there is a movie, and it's great, and it's an adventure,

and it is so good that it becomes a movie people want to make a sequel of both because of some combination of critical reception and financial success you'd prefer if it was a bit of both let's be honest sometimes it's just the financial success but there are examples of great great action movies that have had great, great sequels. But in many cases, you have sequels that destroy the premise and the entire plot of the first film. For example, the film Aliens. This is one of the great action movies, right? You take Alien, classic, classic horror movies.

I would say a near perfect film. You then make Aliens the sequel. Now, there are people out there that will say that Aliens is better than Alien. I find that to be, at best, churlish, if I can use that word. If we don't have to bleep churlish. I mean, Sigourney got an Academy Award nomination for Aliens, but nothing for Alien. Which is an obscenity. But she's great in both films. But Aliens is not where you get the Oscar. Which is an obscenity. But she's great in both films, but

Aliens is not where you get the Oscar. Alien is amazing. So anyway, we're in Aliens, and we go through this whole film. They rescue Newt. Michael Bean is there, saving the day in some way or another. And they escape.

And then David Fincher gets his hands on the IP. Alright? And we get to Alien 3. And then David Fincher gets his hands on the IP. All right. And we get to Alien 3. And how does Alien 3 open? It opens with the death of Newt, Michael Biehn, and the robot played by that guy from, I think, a show called Millennium. The point is, everything that happened in Alien 2 was about saving Newt. And then at the beginning of Alien 3 she's just a fucking corpse floating through space in the opening

frames of the film. And Alien 3 does not get better from there. Another example. Terminator Dark Fate. We spent Terminator 1 and T2 Judgment Day on a very specific mission. Keeping Sarah Connor alive so that

we could keep John Connor alive so that he could keep john connor alive so that he could lead the resistance against the robots in the future and then we get to terminator dark fate and in the first few minutes of it a terminator wanders into a bar and fucking kills john connor right in front of little linda hamilton dead gone po. Why didn't they send somebody four minutes before that? It never makes sense. That's why I don't love time travel as a plot device. I like time travel as a plot device when it plays by a very

specific rule, which is you cannot change the past. Then it's fun. Film called Primer. Film called Twelve Monkeys. Are there other examples of movies where a sequel has destroyed the original? I'm adding this to the rant right now, which is Kendra has just reminded us of

another sequel that ruins the previous movie, which is or at least the ending and the stakes of the previous movie, and that is Star Trek 3 The Search for Spock. Star Trek 2 Wrath of Khan ends with one of the most beautiful and famous scenes in all of science fiction.

The good of the many outweighs the good of the one. Kendra, did I get that close to right? It's close enough? Close enough? Remember, you know, you got Kirk, spoiler alert for Wrath of Khan. You got Spock dying of some kind of space radiation. Puts his hand up. Makes the fucking gesture. Captain Kirk puts his hand on the other side of the glass, makes the gesture.

And then Spock, because of logic and love, dies. And is out the side of the ship in a giant sunglass. This case is very poignant. Giant, shiny coffin. They... That's the sound that Spock makes when he leaves the Starship Enterprise. That's also the same sound that you make

if you get sucked out of a Southwest Airlines flight. Though in that case, it was only half of the body, and then you're stuck with your legs in the Southwest flight, and your torso outside in that case, it was only half of the body. And then you're stuck with your legs in the Southwest flight and your torso outside in the air, which obviously is a rude awakening for you. But it's fine. You're dead for the people on the plane. They just got your legs to contend with.

They're freaking the fuck out. I cannot believe how long I've gone on on this. The point is, that's another sequel that ruined the previous film because all of a sudden, they realized that you can kind of make a new Spock from the parts on Genesis, but he doesn't remember stuff, and he has to relearn some stuff. It's kind of like a

Flowers for Algernon situation with Spock. I just always get frustrated that it's always the most devastating and earth-destroying thing. Like, let's start somewhere and then escalate. It can't always be, oh, this is the most awful thing that's ever happened to the planet.

Let's appreciate that those Marvel movies did destroy a fictional Eastern European country before they then killed half of humanity. I liked that. I thought that that was escalation. I thought it was strange when the sequel to the girl with the dragon tattoo movie, it was like the first one. It's like this small, dark, again, Fincher horror film.

The movie. I haven't read the books. Lock me up, guy. I haven't read the books. Then the next movie, she's like a super secret agent trying to stop nuclear bombs or something. I thought that was a mistake. I thought that was a mistake. Is there some particular recent film that has raised this agita within you?

Is there something that did that? I happen to have recently watched. Listen, I had a little bit of spare time and I may have in the span of three days taken watched Alien, Aliens, Alien 3, Alien Resurrection, Prometheus and Alien Covenant. I may have watched them all in sequence in the last week. That may have just been something I did. Honestly, can I tell you why, though? There's a good reason why. It's a very simple reason.

I was trying to not watch Drag Race because Ronan and I had been watching it together. He was out of town. And so I was desperately trying to stop myself from secretly spoiling Drag Race and having to pretend and watch them all again. So he would have figured it out. He's he's smarter than me and he cracks this. He always knows he can. He's he can.

I don't have a good poker face. Unfortunately, he's an investigative journalist. He'd be talking to people at your workplace. He'd be figuring this thing out. He never I can't lie to him. I can't keep up a straight face. He's like, did you watch RuPaul's Drag Race? And I'll just be like, yes.

What if you want a second Pulitzer for figuring out that you were lying to him? I think it's possible. I would like to add to the premise of your rant with another example. The Carrie diaries changed how Carrie met Samantha from the established canon. Like, we had established canon. And, like, you guys, there are only, like, five or six seasons in Sex and the City. You can just remember how carrie met samantha you don't have to make her the bouncer at a club she was the bouncer at a club she's like the door person or something i didn't watch the carrie

diaries i have a friend named nigel who watches the cw for me and then i ask him what happened did you mind that i called you the super and super spreader no it's perfectly fine I called you the super and super spreader? No, it's perfectly fine. Nigel was also in Provincetown and did not get COVID. It was a really exciting lesson in virology. I also liked that I texted you after we got back and I said, are we still on for dinner tonight?

And you're like, no, I have breakthrough COVID. It's like, oh my God. Well, I'm glad you're feeling better. Yes. I'm glad you didn't get it. Me too. Me too. But think about how powerful my immune system is now. That's, there is, yes.

And you're on the other side of it, so. Yes. Guy Brown and everybody. John, thank you for having me. It has landed on adult birthday parties coming in hot. Erin Ryan, the floor is yours. The recent actions of a certain former president have brought adult birthdays to my attention. Jimmy Carter. Yes, Jimmy Carter, that drama queen celebrating his birthday.

No, I think adult birthdays and the etiquette around them has been something that has been slowly snowballing throughout my adult life. And I think that we are on a crash course with high maintenance nightmare situations unless we nip some of the tendencies of adult birthdays in the bud right now. Okay, so adult birthdays have gotten out of hand. We need to talk about them. Otherwise, we're going to have people being forced to fly around the country, friendships being lost over these things. We can't have that. They're birthdays.

They're birthdays. Birthdays are the least important adult milestone holiday unless your birthday ends in a zero. Then it's kind of important. Or you literally almost died in the last year. I think that then it is okay and appropriate to make a huge deal out of your birthday. But otherwise, or if you're like Jimmy Carter's age,

if you're over 90 and every single year is a gift, if every time you trend on Twitter, people post the Denzel relief gift, then you can celebrate your birthday every year. You know? I think we need to get a couple things straight. First of all, the word birthday contains the word day. It is not a birthday week.

There is no day week. It is the week of your birthday. If you want to talk about things happening around your birthday, it is the week of your birthday. It is the month of your birthday. It is not your birthday month. Yeah. It is not your birthday week.

I don't like it when it's birthday official and then birthday, parens, observed. Yes. Unless you – Exactly. Exactly. Like birthdays are not like Mardi Gras. Like you get the day. Yeah.

If you want to celebrate like events staggered around because your friends don't have availability, then that's fine. But please don't say birthday week or birthday month. It's very much a red flag. birthday week or birthday month, it's very much a red flag. I also want to say that birthday celebrations, and I don't like to shade the former president, but I'm going to because, like you, Lovett, I try to be a straight shooter. Birthdays are not an opportunity to show off your important friends. Birthdays are an opportunity to celebrate with the people that you know

and you like. Now you've lost me. Now you've lost me. That already like you. Now I'm not following you anymore. I just think that if you're going to have like a wedding, if you're going to have some sort of like a bar mitzvah, if you're going to have a life event celebration,

unless the point of your life was to build an impressive list of famous friends that you love taking pictures with, then invite people that you actually know, that you actually care about. Otherwise, it sort of defeats the whole purpose of a birthday. Maybe if you have good values. Yes, if you have good values.

I think it betrays having bad values if you would just use it as an opportunity to invite people that are famous and cool. What if some of your closest friends are famous and cool? What if that's just your life? Then it's fine. Then they're legitimately your friends. Something goes wrong in your life, you're texting Beyonce. Like, what's up, Beyonce?

What if when you drop your dog off at daycare and they say, who's your emergency contact? It happens to be Beyonce. Then invite Beyonce. Right. But I think that you shouldn't have your birthday list be comprised of people who are like your most famous friends. This feels very specific. This feels like it's aimed at a person in your life. No, it's aimed at people who have had...

Put the name in the chat. So here's the thing. Also at this point right now in American history, unless you are literally Jimmy Carter age, I think this is the year to cancel a big birthday celebration. Wow. You know, I think that should be the first thing on the chopping block. If you're thinking about having a birthday celebration this year, it's a little dicey.

I think you should cut it back. Birthday is in three days. Let me just see if I can recall this e-bite. Wait, is it really? Get this back. Yeah, no, it is. It is. And I actually have the same.

I have a similar. Why do I want to say recalcitrance? Say it. I do. It's your show. I have a similar. Why do I want to say recalcitrance? Say it. I do. It's your show. I have a similar feeling. And as our generation has pushed certain other milestones back or out of significance, the birthday replaced, I think, for a lot of people in their 30s and 20s, what would have been

weddings and children like, you like you're you're um with child as they say and uh a lot of my friends are having kids now but that is late right like and historically speaking it is it is later than was the norm for a very long time and so i just feel like we're evolving customs to kind of keep milestones happening in like the years in which right in like certain cities, there's just going to be fewer kind of other milestones earlier, you know? Totally. And like who can afford to get married nowadays? Weddings are crazy expensive and so are babies. I'm planning on taking out a second mortgage on the house that I don't own in order to have a baby. But no, I think there's

nothing wrong with celebrating your birthday as an adult. What is irksome, I'm using recalcitrant, that's my recalcitrant, is people who are super high maintenance about their birthdays and sort of think about inviting someone to their adult birthday celebration as sort of like a friendship subpoena, like you have to show up or there's problems between the two of us. I feel like people just need to, unless their birthday ends in a zero or they literally almost died in the last year. What about a five?

What about a five and it was a bad car accident? Five bad car accidents. But nobody never had a chance of dying. Just like... Okay. You know what? If we're going to... There's a bolt in the leg.

There's a five at the end of the birthday party. No famous friends. Then I'll allow it. Okay. The birthday court will allow it. It was serious. It was a femur thing, right? I think it was.

Oh, my gosh. Nothing to sneeze at, but they're not going to die. Well, I know, but it's like cool to see people's casts. How many times as an adult do you get a chance to like sign one of your friend's casts? That's cool. Like they're always saying like, oh, yeah, my car was total, but it was more like an insurance totaling, not like a, you know, totaling could mean totaled or it could mean totaled. So it's like not like a, you know, it's not a drunk driving commercial,

but like it was a scary moment. Right. I think, you know what? I think that if you haven't seen the friend in a long time, they have a right to get a little bit irritated if you're not going to show up and under those circumstances. But I think under most circumstances, if you're an adult, you don't really have a right to like enforce your birthday on other people. Okay. That's, That's all. And happy birthday, by the way. And happy birthday to me and to everybody out there celebrating this summer. Erin Ryan says keep it to close family and friends.

Make like Barack Obama and keep the list close family and friends. Beyonce, the dog daycare contact. Exactly. Erin Ryan, everybody. Thank you so much for joining. Thank you for having me. That was fun. Don't go anywhere.

This is Love It or Leave It and there's more on the way. It has landed on Meg Ryan. Suggested by Danny Pellegrino. Hi, Danny. Hello. I'm so happy to be here. And I do have a rant.

I specifically want to talk about Meg Ryan. Meg Ryan, to me, she brought so much to pop culture. She gave us so much throughout the years. Everything from Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally, You've Got Mail, Top Gun, When a Man Loves a Woman. I mean, the films are endless. And I feel like she was disrespected towards the end of her run in feature films. And I would like to write that wrong. Specifically, I think this is threefold. Number one, the love life. Now, around the start of the 2000s, she was blamed for her relationship ending with Dennis Quaid. Now, we learned after later, she gave an interview with InStyle

where she said Dennis had been cheating on her as well. So she was the one who was blamed for the entire dissolution of that relationship when really we know now that it was twofold, right? Although they were still married, she did proof of life with Russell Crowe. They did seem to have an affair and she admitted to that.

And who fucking wouldn't? If you have blood in your goddamn veins proof of life russell crowe right come on i'll remember a 1999 2000 russell crowe i mean she's a red-blooded woman and especially now that we know what was going on with her relationship with dennis we know but back then women were oftentimes painted as the problem in these relationships that were dissolved. I mean, whether it be Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey, she was pointed as the one who was cheating. Even Nick Lachey had done a music video with his now wife, Vanessa Lachey, that was supposed to be a takeoff sort of of newlyweds. And that song was recorded

while he was still in the relationship with Jessica Simpson. But all the tabloids, everything, they made it seem like she was the one cheating. Same thing happened with Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake. He profited off the end of the relationship. You bet he did. And she was just completely blamed for all of it. In a way, we all profited because that song is good. Crimea River is good.

We should face it. It's good. We don't have to like the politics now. We can have questions about it. And we can dislike the video but it's a cool song i'm gonna zip my mouth on that one you don't think you know what you know what this is what happens with these these left-wing ideologues they can't i understand that it's a but it's still good art all right i have a problem with the video yes of course i do think

there's better songs on that album i like like i love you better if we're we're going to grab hold of one of these, it's a really great song. That's what I would choose from that debut album. Or the song he did with another woman he wronged, Janet Jackson, from that debut album. You bet. So that was sort of like a pattern at that time. And Meg Ryan was one of the victims of it. And then the other thing I want to talk about is her looks. Now, around that time, around the turn of the millennium, and then even when she thing I want to talk about is her looks. Now, around that

time, around the turn of the millennium, and then even when she did her sort of comeback vehicle, The Women, which wasn't the best movie. It's an enjoyable Sunday watch, though, I would argue that. But there were so many tabloids about what Meg did to her face. I mean, you can look at the magazine covers. She looked beautiful. If you rewatch The Women, you will see how beautiful and stunning she looked. And I think now there's different sort of ideals that we have in terms of beauty. And so many different people are getting fillers and Botox and things like that. And she was the one who took the brunt of all of that with all of these magazine covers. And I think I would just encourage everyone to go back and look at that time and realize that she was stunning.

She was perfect. And the media doesn't let women age in the way that they should let women age. The third thing is her talent. Yes. I don't think she's respected for how talented she is. And it's largely because those rom-coms that she did, a lot of people think of them as fluff. But the way that she's able to produce chemistry with not only Tom Hanks, Billy Crystal, really anyone she was in a lot of people think of them as fluff. But the way that she's able to produce chemistry with not only Tom Hanks, Billy Crystal, really anyone she was in a scene with, you watch her in

a scene with Debra Messing in The Women, she could create chemistry. The way that she in You've Got Mail was able to exude sexuality without there being anything sexual in the movie. There's one kiss at the end of the movie. What are you thinking? I'm really thinking about Meg Ryan as an actor. And you're absolutely right about the lack of respect she gets for her performance. It's the hardest thing to quantify, but the most important quality that someone like Meg Ryan has, which is that like movie star charisma, just like when she is on screen, she is so captivating. And I was glad you brought up You Got Mail because I do think of it, it may not be the best rom-com that she did but to me it is like the performance in which every moment she's on screen she is turning it into something interesting what she does with

her face and her like her facial expressions her hand movements her gestures her attitude like every moment she's on screen you can just tell like, this is a director and actor in sync with each other. And the fact the other thing, too, is it's like, you're right, like, there was no acceptable way for her to age. And she is in those movies with Tom Hanks, who we all recognize as one of the most charismatic and fantastic every men, every man, whatever. And yet in every scene she is in with Tom Hanks, she is not just like holding her own. She is just as captivating, just as interesting, just as worth watching.

And then you're right, she just disappeared. And I do think that there was some like, oh, well, you know, she doesn't look exactly like we expect her or want her to look. And so goodbye forever, Meg Ryan. No, you're totally right about that. I will say that like, you know, I think like culturally there was a period of time where

no one could forgive Leonardo DiCaprio for not looking like he looked in Titanic. It was like, no, you need to be a perfect 20 year old drowning man. And anything after that will find unacceptable. But I do think also like with Meg Ryan, like David E. Kelly has made like Nicole Kidman his muse and like, like, hey, somebody out there with, like, a big Netflix deal or an Apple overall,

make Meg Ryan your muse, all right? It's time. Right. It's time. And she's really great in dramatic work, too. I think some of the dramatic movies

she did wasn't great. Like, there's that movie When a Man Loves a Woman, which I love, but it's maybe not the greatest movie. But Meg has moments in there that shows such great talent. And she's just not looked at in the same way as you're right.

Or even a Julie Roberts, Sandra Bullock, who've been able to sort of get out of that rom-com box for some reason. And I don't know if it is the fair situation because that was just like everywhere before sort of the Brad and Jen stuff there was a lot of media publicity around Dennis Meg and Russell but I don't quite understand like what does this woman have to do she's given us so much contributed so much I feel like um I am Christopher Moltisanti in Sopranos when they're pushing webistics. And it's just like, buy Meg Ryan stock. It's a bargain. We're pushing Meg Ryan stock today.

Buy Meg Ryan. It's time. It's going to rocket. Right. Meg Ryan stock. Right. Her and Bonnie Hunt. I'm buying in now.

Oh, my God. There's a matter of moments. Look, if we're going to get into it, we're going to get into it. Let's talk about Bonnie Hunt. Let's do it. Fuck is Bonnie Hunt a star? Bonnie Hunt turns being a tour guide into in the White House for like 10 seconds into a scene stealing moment. Every moment she's on screen is a fucking delight.

You know who knew that? David Letterman. Every time Bonnie Hunt was on David Letterman, it was a dream. Even when she had nothing to promote. Same goes for another talent. Amy Sedaris. Amy Sedaris. And just to piggyback off you, the best line in Jerry Maguire to me isn't, you had me at hello. It's don't cry at the beginning of the day, cry at the end like I do. And that line was improvised by Bonnie Hunt. A genius. Bonnie Hunt is a genius. A queen, an icon, and a legend.

Every one of her failed sitcoms should have been ahead. Life with Bonnie. Every goddamn one. Life with Bonnie. Right. Right. We all deserve a little bit more life with Bonnie. Honestly.

And Meg. And Amy. Let's get them in something together. And while we're here, Alfre Woodard, you know? Alfre, sure. Sure. Where's her star vehicle? Now we got a cast.

Now we got a cast. White Lotus season two. That's it for me. Let's get some of these people that I just, you know, for sure. Sure. Where's her star? We got a cast. I mean, now we got a white lotus season two. That's it for me. Let's get some of these people that I just, you know, obviously, Ryan Murphy, you mentioned David E. Kelly, like some of these people, they pick certain actresses like a Jessica Lange. It's like there are a lot of other of these brilliant older talents that we just need to start utilizing.

I completely agree. But honestly, all of this can't be on Ryan Murphy's shoulders. The man is doing his part. Right. All right. Ryan Murphy is out there. He is out there doing this work. He's on the front lines. He's on the front lines, getting them in front of the red light. Ryan Murphy does the work. Ryan Murphy does the work. A larger issue. We need to get more gay men who are able to produce, write, create their own scripted work so we can utilize a lot of these talents. Ryan Murphy does that. Danny Pellegrino, thank you so much.

Thank you, John. Thank you for having me. It has landed on Island TV. Suggested by Emily Heller. We need to talk about HBO's latest hit show about a bunch of people on an island, vacation, trying to sort through their issues.

I'm, of course, talking about Fuckboy Island. Oh, you're talking about Fuckboy Island. I'm not talking about Fuckboy Island. You thought it was White Lotus, but it's not as Fuckboy Island. You thought it was White Lotus. It's Fuckboy Island.

Actually, it's F-Boy Island. F-Boy Island. And, okay, let's say, on the surface, this show seems totally up my alley. I love Nikki Glaser. I've spent at least 100 hours of this pandemic watching Love Island UK, so you know I'm on board for this kind of trash. I was excited to tune in. The premise of FBoy Island is there's a bunch of guys claiming to be nice guys, but some of them are secretly fuckboys.

guys claiming to be nice guys, but some of them are secretly fuckboys. Now, I clicked on it even though it was called F-Boy Island because I get you maybe can't name your TV show, Fuckboy Island, and still get the press coverage that you want. I'm eager to hear what comes next. But five minutes into the show, and I realize not only do they refer to the title of the show as F-Boy Island, all of the people on the show are saying the word F-Boy. They never actually utter the word fuck. They don't. They never say it.

And I just want to know, who is that for? Who's the person watching this show who's like, yeah, okay, I'm on board with the half naked hedonistic bacchanalia, but if I hear a cuss word, it will upset my delicate puritanical sensibilities. It's HBO Max. Who the fuck are we kidding here? Did you watch it? Could you handle it?

I couldn't handle it. I have to say, it had a lot of what I've been looking for during this difficult time. It had Nikki Glaser. It had the promise of intrigue. And I thought, you know what? One thing that I've been trying to do is I'm going to give reality TV more of a chance. I'm not really been a reality TV person since the very first season of Survivor when the naked gay man who stole the money won the thing. And I ran around my house as a teen with my comforter around my neck like a cape screaming.

I was so excited about what was unfolding. Real something cool. To finally be represented on television as a gay con man. It's like I've never seen myself in another character before. But I had the exact same reaction as you. I was like, I get calling it F-Boy Island. But then Nikki says F-Boy Island. And then they all start saying F-Boy. And it really did take me out of it because it's like...

I felt like I was being gaslit. It's because this show is, and I mean this in the best way, moral trash. Yeah. And I think if we had Nikki at this table, she'd say, absolutely, it's trash, and that's the fun. She is in on the joke. Everyone on that show is in on the joke. No one who shouldn't hear the word

fuck should be seeing this program the actual program is far more destructive yes than the word fuck the program is genuinely disgusting and here's the thing i assumed because i have been watching love island uk that they would be able to say the word fuck because they say it all the time on Love Island UK. Are you watching Love Island UK? I'm not. I'm not. Okay. I'm not.

Because if you want a real fuckboy island, this season of Love Island UK, and I'm talking, spoiler alert, skip ahead if you're watching and you aren't caught up, but this is already out of date because we're watching them a week behind and this is coming out two days later. There's going to be two more hours of the show between when I record this and when this comes out. But I am talking specifically to Tyler. Tyler, you are a fuckboy. Here's the situation. Throughout the season, they send new people into the house to try and stir shit up. And every season. Why would they do that?

Every season, there's someone from the original group group some kind of sweet angel that the audience is always rooting for to find love who keeps getting mugged off and this year it's kaz okay she's a lovely beautiful woman who keeps getting fucked over i'm just gonna use the terms they use and you can figure it out from context clues the way i had to. They leave in a lorry. So she's been mugged off. And the audience is not here for it. They know that she's a fan favorite because. Because they want her there to snog. They want someone for her to crack on with.

Okay. And they know that we want good things for her because everyone who's ever fucked her over gets less votes every time there's a vote in the audience. The audience votes on who they like, and every time they're like, the least amount of votes go to the person who was mean to Kaz. For the audience. She meant fewer votes. I didn't understand when she said less votes.

She meant fewer votes. Okay, the producers know we want her to find someone, so as they send people in, they find someone. What they do is when there's someone that they know we want good things for, they send someone in just for them. They look at all of the people waiting to be sent in, and they're like, who's here for Kaz? 100% lost. Okay.

So they send someone in just for Kaz. This guy, Tyler. Tall, gorgeous guy who's like, Kaz, you're my number one. And two days later they get separated and he gets sent to Casa Amor and he immediately cracks up with someone else. And I just want to say, Tyler, look, I know it's early days, but how stupid can you be?

I'm not even mad at you for being disloyal. Because look, I love Kaz, but she also said in the Unseen Bits episode that she wasn't sure if unicorns are real, so I can't root for her that much. But I'm just mad at him for having no goddamn strategy. The only plausible strategy you can have as a new player on this show is to graft with one of the more popular people. And you immediately mugged her off.

Are you fucking daft? You look like a right wanker, mate. Emily Heller, everybody. Should I watch the news? Should I be paying attention to the news instead of this you don't need the news that was great thank you thank you for having me

okay I have to record an addendum to my Love Island rant because some things have happened since I recorded it before and it hasn't necessarily changed how I feel about Tyler but uh he has been downgraded from official fuck boy to fuck boy on notice but also no he's still a fuck boy but also can I say the season's almost done and we were promised that this season they were going to be recruiting LGBTQIA cast members and uh they didn't. There's no one. This is like

the straightest season ever aside from all the other seasons. I'm just waiting for something kind of gay to happen, and it hasn't happened. This is probably what I should have talked about when John was here. Alright, that's the end of my addendum. Thank you so much to Alex English, Josh Gondelman, Danny Pellegrino,

Guy Branum, Megan Gailey, Aaron Ryan, Emily Heller, and Danielle Perez for joining us. I hope you feel as good as I do. That was amazing. But before we go, after all that negativity, we really need to end on a high note. Here it is, this week's high note. Hey, John. This is Allison from Brooklyn, New York. My high note of the week is that it has officially been one month of solid poops or doosies for my dog, President Billy Bartlett. It has been an excruciating journey of every day possible, medications, doctors, ER visits. I just felt so powerless at times, and I'm sure she was much more miserable than me. Much more miserable than me.

And over the last many months, I've spent countless hours analyzing pictures of doosies online and reading archived message boards. John, it has been bleak. But now, after trying one last thing that we thought she'd be allergic to and isn't, the president has had solid poops each time, each day. I want to throw a fucking party for each fucking doocy. It's amazing. And she feels so much better too. It's time for her birthday. Thank you and everyone out there. Take care. Hey, love it. This is Kelly in New York City. And my high note this week is that my incredible wife, Erin, is turning 40. And myself and a bunch of other vaxxed friends and family who love her are going to get to celebrate her in person for her big day.

And she's also a stage manager. And after 18 months of absolutely no theater, she's starting rehearsals next week for a brand new play by Annie Baker at the Signature Theater. So there's so much to celebrate. and we love you and all the pods. And we're so grateful to you for helping us through this crazy time. Thanks. Love it. Bye. Hey, love it.

This is Andy from Houston, Texas. My high note this week is that I found my second AirPod headphone. I've been lost for about six months, and we've been reunited. Thanks. Bye. Hey, Love It. This is Anne calling from Kumasi, Ghana, where I'm doing a research fellowship. My high note this week is that my best friend, Emily fucking Brown, is vaccinated, visaed, and on her way to visit me, all the way from Washington, D.C.

We've done a great job keeping in touch while I've been here. We regularly discuss your show during our weekly phone chats, but it's not the same as seeing her in person. I cannot wait to listen to the latest episode of Love It or Leave It together at last. Thanks for all you do. Can't wait to hear the new episode. Bye. Thanks, everybody who called in with those high notes.

If you want to leave us a message about something that gave you hope, you can call us at 213-262-4427. I also want to make one note, which is this. I record this to introduce the high notes and to do the outro for the high notes before I hear the high notes. And so I do this like very, very like non-emotional high note intro and outro. And then I listen to the episode and hear all the high notes and they're so amazing. And then I come back in, I'm like, thanks a bunch. And I just want you to know that I'm registering that distinction. It's something we can do about it. All right. That's just how it goes. Anyway, thank you to all of our guests. And there are 444 days until the 2022 midterm election. Have a great weekend. Love It or Leave It is a Crooked Media production.

It is written and produced by me, John Lovett, and Lee Eisenberg. Kendra James is our senior producer. Hallie Kiefer is our head writer. Jocelyn Kaufman, Pallavi Ganalan, and Peter Miller are the writers. Our associate producer is Brian Semel. Bill Lance is our editor. And Kyle Seglin is our sound engineer. Our theme song is written and performed by Sure Sure.

Thanks to our designers, Jesse McClain and Marissa Meyer for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast. And to our digital producers, Nar Melkonian and Milo Kim, Mia Kelman and Matt DeGroot for filming and editing video each week so you can.