Lovett or Leave It - New York Sees Red

Episode Date: June 27, 2026

Mamdani's candidates win big in New York. Pesticides win big at the Supreme Court. And we all win when John Stamos stops by to talk Beach Boys, Full House, and why his dad finally let him quit flipping burgers. Then Jodie-Turner Smith waxes philosophical about aliens, accents, Michael Fassbender, and a gripping defense of toe shoes, courtesy of the Egg of Truth. And don’t worry, baby: we have plenty of Second Thoughts to go around.For a transcript of an episode of Lovett or Leave It, please email [e-mail].

Sometimes you want to hear directly from the people at the center of the story. On NPR's newsmakers, they go face to face with the people shaping this moment. Here, NPR's biggest interviews featuring guests like Dave Chappelle, Jill Biden, and Zoran, Mamdani, hopefully not at the same time. With questions that matter and a push for real answers, follow newsmakers wherever you listen to podcast or watch on YouTube. Leave it live from Hollywood, I'm John Lovett, and in the spirit of socialism, thank you for waiting in line to hear these free jokes. We've got a great show for you tonight, but first, let's get into it. What a week.

New York City voters went to the polls on Tuesday, and the three left-wing candidates endorsed by Mayor Zohran Mundani swept their races with two toppling establishment-backed incumbents. Viva la Revolution! shouted Senator Chuck Schumer in a kofia trying to blend in. Former city controller and mayoral candidate Brad Lander beat incumbent Congressman Dan Goldman in the city's 10th district. The most hard-fought battle between two Jewish men in their 50s since every time the check comes.

Lander described the war in Gaza as a genocide and called for banning military aid for Israel, while Goldman, who lost by more than 30 points, has been very critical of Netanyahu while opposing an outright ban and accepting support from APEC. Goldman attributed his loss to anti-Semitism, but Brad Lander is also Jewish, New York's 10th district is one of the most Jewish in the country. That dog don't hunt.

That gefilta, it don't fish. Here's Lander on Wednesday on where he thinks the Democratic establishment went wrong. We can't be a party that compromises on some people's humanity. Democratic voters are saying loud and clear they don't want to pay for any more of Netanyahu's wars. And they need that change in the party. So first of all, I don't think you can blame that guy winning on anti-Semitism. If he came across any more Jewish, I think bagels would be literally falling out of his mouth. I'm Jewish. You're not that familiar with the show. There's the safety of me being Jewish to make these kinds of jokes. So you can feel comfortable laughing even if you're not Jewish and not familiar. I give you that permission, which I'm allowed to do,

according to the laws of Woke 2.0, which are actually different than the laws of Woke 2.0, in which I could not give you that permission. And me making these jokes would have been a trap. Conservatives immediately began an epic freak out. On Tuesday night, President Bush's former press secretary Ari Fleischer, tweeted, free advice to New Yorkers, get out while you still can. The rise of socialism in NYC will threaten everyone. Mondani's power will increase. Socialists will gain more seats and they're coming next for you.

Get out now. And to all the fleeing New Yorkers, we welcome you to Los Angeles. Less socialism, yeah. And as of this morning, we finally extinct. the massive warehouse fire that was blanketing the region and smoke. Great news, everybody. It has been one day since our city was on fire. In the we... yeah, that's what we're applauding now. God, we gotta get it together in LA. In the wee hours on Wednesday morning, Trump posted America the Beautiful will never be a communist country.

Yeah, if America were communist, the next thing you know the state would be blaming sabotage for its own incompetence and allowing corrupt insiders to buy contracts and pardons and using state-run media to smear their enemies and nationalizing important companies and censoring the free press and putting political hacks in charge of intelligence agencies and using the Justice Department to target political opponents and refusing to enforce the law against their friends and we can't have that that would be terrible. It is true that one of the winning democratic socialist Darla Liza Avila Chevalier has said some really dumb stuff. So as main Senate nominee Graham Platner. In both cases, voters chose these candidates over long-serving well-known political figures in their 70s. So if you're worried that voters chose candidates that you view is unacceptable,

maybe it's worth asking why the establishment candidates are viewed as even less acceptable. Even dominoes owned up to the fact that their pizza needed work, establishment Democrats should look inward and ask, are we arriving cold? Is our cheese congealed? And when you pull off a slice, the cheese from the neighboring slice comes with. So you have to kind of rip it apart with your fingers, which sucks. Are we even delivering at all? Former DNC chair, Jamie Harrison, posted, if you hate the Democratic Party, then don't run for our nomination. But isn't there a word for someone who hates the Democratic Party but runs as a Democrat anyway? I remember it now. The word is Democrat. Here's James Carvel. It's time for Democrats

to talk the S word, schism. I really do. And everybody's always said, no, no, we're a coalition, we're a big tent. And there's some, there's just some shit that I can't be in the same tent with. Okay, you can't say the S word, then say the S word is schism, and then say shit. So help him God, he will turn this Carville around. Rage and Cajun, more like Agent Cajun. Look, is Zoroam Dani not supposed to boost his allies and try to build power in order to enact his agenda? Isn't that the entire point of politics? Do you think he should just fuck off at five and veg out watching the hit procedural, Elspeth? Sure, I would prefer it if my settlers of Catan opponents didn't build settlements in cities, but I would probably dislike them even

more if they didn't try. At the same time, the more power the DSA gains, the more responsibility this movement has. Avila Chevalier took heat for old social media posts in which she called for abolishing police in prisons, called Joe Biden a rapist, said fuck Kamala Harris, and denied Israel's existence. She also once tweeted that white people should only marry other white people, so don't say she's not capable across the aisle. But Avila Chevalier deleted and disavowed some of her most incendiary posts saying, I have grown considerably in the years since these tweets. And that post ended with, I, like Stalin, am just misunderstood, but she has since apologized and deleted that as well. I'm glad she's walked back her worst comments. In the same way,

I'm glad Graham Platner has apologized for the mistakes he made. And I'm As a token of my appreciation, I will walk back one of my own dumb comments. In hindsight, Trump is going to win in 2016. Does it mean you have to like these people? No. Does it mean you can't be critical when you disagree? Of course not. But this is a democracy, and nobody gets to take their ball and go home.

It was wrong when a faction of the left refused to support Kamala Harris in 2024. Yes, the anger was rooted in moral outrage over the Biden administration's response to Gaza. But the anger being valid. does not make ignoring the stakes of an election righteous. You can feel something and then choose how you respond to that feeling. That's something I learned in therapy back when I still needed that. There are some on the left who are more animated by attacking Democrats than working with them to defeat Republicans. And there are centrist like James Carville and Jamie Harrison who seem willing to help Republicans use three socialists

in three of the most liberal districts in the country to suggest it represents the entire Democratic Party. And I say to all of them what I say to people who bring both small dogs and big dogs into the grocery store. Shame on all of you equally. But sometimes I do it, and when I do it, it's fine. This is a coalition that runs from anti-Trump former Republicans to Mamdani, from Pennsylvania Governor Josh Shapiro to Vermont Independent Bernie Sanders. And that's what it will take. The answer to right-wing authoritarianism is a diverse democratic movement big enough to stop it.

And if holding that coalition together, we're easy, we'd all be home. home by now watching Ellsbeth Thursdays on CBS, which is why I'm going to ask you all to immediately go to Votesaveamerica.com and sign up to help win the midterms. Because look at what we've seen just this week in a six-three decision. The Supreme Court's conservative majority allowed Trump to end the temporary protected status program for Haitians and Syrians, which allowed people fleeing violence and natural disasters to live and work in the United States. See, I told you what we were doing was right, said an ICE. officer to his ex-wife before her new husband walked him back to his car and reminded him kindly,

but firmly, that he's only supposed to stop by the house on Fridays to pick up the kids. Justice Samuel Alito, writing for the majority, rejected claims that the administration's decision had anything to do with racism towards Haitians. We now go to Trump for a response. They're eating the dogs, the people that came in, they're eating the cats. Why do we want these people from, quote, all these shithole countries here. It's a permanent pause on third world migration, including from hellholes like Afghanistan, Haiti. I didn't say shithole, you did.

I still don't hear it, said Samuel Alito, getting ready to unwind by watching the latest episode of Ellsbeth. It's a show for everybody. In another decision, a 7-2 majority rejected the lawsuit of a Missouri man who claimed that the weed killer Roundup caused his. cancer, the two justices who dissented, liberal Katanjee Brown Jackson, and conservative Neil Gorsuch. Weird day on the bench.

It's like when I got paired with that popular girl in science class, and you know what? We actually had like a fun time and laughed a lot, and then later I saw her in the lunchroom, and I thought she was waving at me, but she was waving at somebody behind me. The jury awarded John Dernel, a Gardner and St. Louis, who developed non-Honchkins lymphoma, a $1.25 million award, which the Supreme Court has now overturned. Okay, but what have I already spent the money? said Dernel trying to cover up a pile of lobster shells in the passenger footwell of his G-wagon. Brett Kavanaugh, writing for the majority, said that the jury couldn't punish Monsanto for failing to warn consumers

because a warning label would conflict with the Trump administration's finding that Roundup is safe. Studies have shown a link between Roundup's active ingredient glyphosate and cancer, and I will continue to trust our scientists until they tell me to stop drinking Diet Coke, at which point I'll completely break. Diet Coke in my left hand, Ivermectin in my right hand, and Dr. Fauci in my fucking trunk. All right. And we have got a great show for you tonight.

We'll be right back with John Stamos. Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. Love or Leave It is brought to you by Built. Whether you're renting or paying a mortgage, one of your biggest monthly expenses should be working harder for you. That's where Bill comes in. Built is the membership for where you live that rewards you with points on every housing payment,

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Helixleep.com slash love it. And we're back. The one and only John. We'll be out in just a moment. But first, a huge thank you to our friends of the pod. If you're not yet a subscriber, consider this your midterm reminder. As a subscriber, you get a discounted ticket to CrookedCon. You get ad-free episodes of all your favorite pods.

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Plus, we have the first Gen Z member of Congress, Maxwell Frost, joining us. go to crooked.com slash events. All right. Please welcome to the stage. It's America's hot-ass uncle. It's John Stamos. Hi, thank you for being here.

Come on in. How does that make me feel, Doc? Oh, you want to do some therapy? Yeah, go ahead. I bet you're a good therapist. So where did we leave off? Well, I was going to... So you didn't expect that.

That's tough. That's good. Did they ask where we left off? You should know. Sometimes if they're bad. Oh. Hi, John. Hi.

How are you doing? I'm so impressed with you. You are a young man who's accomplished so much, and you're just extremely impressive, and I'm happy to meet you, and I'm happy to be on your show. That's nice. You can clap. Wow. Do you know?

This is a good audience, too, because you were laying out some sophisticated jokes, and they were laughing really hard. It's a sophisticated crowd, I could tell. They're good looking to? I could tell they can have handsome, nice looking. I felt they could handle it. So do you feel like you were? was, look, I think not many people get to have the experience of being a classic 80s, 90s heartthrob.

That was a very special time. It was a special time in the culture. And I wonder if you've like thought, like, first of all, do you have any specific, surprising experiences of being a heart throb? And was it ever like, look, obviously, I think there's a lot of people that would, I don't know, drive a car through their family's home to get to be a heartthrob. But where they're like, they didn't make it hard at times. You were like tagged. He's like, no, he's too good looking to play that kind of lawyer. Right, right, right.

Well, I always hate good-looking people that said, oh, I was too good-looking to get work and stuff. I plowed through everything. And, you know, like, Full House was just kind of coming around to really understanding why people love it. I have an eight-year-old son and he watches it. I think he watches it to mock me basically. I'll be like, Billy, put away your leg.

I was like, you got it, dude. He's giving me catchphrase. But, you know, there were no main character. The main character on that show was love in it. But it took me many, many, many years to accept, you know, to accept it. And I've been able to do Broadway and, you know, I've been on, I was on ER for years. And I don't want to list of my stuff. But I got, I've got to do, you know, stuff that, you know, wasn't really based on looks or that kind of thing.

Did I answer your question, Doc? Yeah, but do you feel like Full House, you said like it took a while to embrace it? Did you struggle with that? feel like it wasn't what you wanted? What do you mean? It wasn't what I wanted to per se when I was doing it, but then I came around to it after a year or two. I realized, you know, this is really beautiful show and it's good for families. But then it was tough, you know, the guy from full house. It was hard to get work that I wanted to do. So it took me a while, but I'm just grateful I got to do so many things since then. But it was a blessing. My whole life has been a blessing. I'm leading

with gratitude these days because I can't, you know, in a blink of an eye, you're, thank you. In a blink of an eye, you're old, you know, you're not there yet, but you just go, like, what happened? It just goes by so fast. Like, every moment you have to, I don't want to sound like Oprah or something, but you really have to, like, enjoy every moment and be in the moment, like, be here with you right now. It's difficult, but it's, you know, it's worth it because at the end of the day, I can go, I was really there for the audience today. I was really connected to John, and I had a good day, you know? It's so important to be present.

It's hard, though. It takes energy, doesn't it? Yes. I can be present here, but rarely in other places. Right. Do you have ADD? 100%. Oh, it's a terminal case.

Yeah, they study me at night. Who does my brain? The scientists. The scientists, they study my brain. They're like, wow, this is an archetypal. We should cut this brain up when he's done with it. But I think people with real good ADD are brilliant. I think they'd like to think so.

I think it's an asset and not a... Because you're bouncing around and thinking of ideas. But, you know, it's good to focus, and you seem focused now. I'll stay. But I'm also on Adderall. But the... Oh, boy, the Adderall really makes a difference. Does it make you calm you down?

That's the thing that's crazy. I know I have it because it brings me down. I mean, obviously I have an amped energy, but that's biological. I'm always like this. But when I take the... Like, it's a drug that's an upper. When I take it, I kind of lock into the mechanism and calm down. I do need it.

You're a good candidate. Well, because when I used to write speeches, I would wait until the last possible moment where if I don't start right now, I'm going to be in trouble. And this is for, like, the president of the United States. I literally am procrastinating as to the last possible moment, and right when I should be filled with an unadulterated level of panic, this is a speech about the economy during a financial crisis across the globe. I'll take a 10 to 15 minute nap. You got to conk out at the worst moment. Then you get up and, boy, are you in trouble? And then I would write through the night.

I'd write through the night. What was your favorite speech that you wrote? Oh, well, you know, I... You're so young to be writing these speeches, these honorable speeches by these powerful people that are saying your words. What does that feel like? So nice. I'll interview you for a while. You can interview me. Sure.

I would say this. I would say this. If you saw... If we could see what I would look like without the hair transplants and the various... You don't have hair. Come on. Three of them. Do you really? Three of them? Did you go to Turkey? No. I don't go to... I won't let someone cut me in a place I can't sue. Okay. Right, right, right. I've had four. You've had four? No. This is... This is natural.

Now, I would never guess that you had hair transplant. I know, I went to a good guy. Did it hurt? Yeah. Okay. Why did you have three? Did he mess it up the first two times? No, no, no, because you keep losing.

You know what I mean? Did they take it from your pubic hair? Like, what is it? Well, they're working their way. No, no. Thank you for asking. They take it from the back of the head and the asshole. Okay.

No, just the back of that. This is just your hair. Your hair does smell. You just get to have. this hair, yeah, thanks a lot. This is just your hair line. It's going back to my gratitude. I'm so grateful. Yeah, you should be grateful. My, um, my spirit animal is Jamie Lee Curtis. And every morning we, we, we, we, we write what we're grateful for, what we're fearful of and, uh, like an attribute or something like a, you know, a lover or everything. Oh, that's so nice. I do think people,

if a good-looking person is not grateful, it's really ugly, it's ugly. Yeah, you can be shitty. Because look at what you were given. That hairline is crazy. That's a crazy thing. I don't think about it. You should. Okay. You should think about it. I'm going to start thinking about it now. Do you ever think about, you ever wake up with, God, I'm handsome. Come on, you must. That's crazy.

No. You're like, you'd never do. Sometimes. I think you should. I love you. You're really great. Thank. I mean, I did, you know, I was flattered that you asked me to be on here, and I've watched you, and I've listened to you on the other podcast.

And you're just, and I just sort of did a deep job on you. I'm just fascinated by you. What the heck? What the heck is happening? Stop charming me, John Samos. I'll run this is my show. These are my microphones. That's something Reagan said in a debate once.

Okay, so you're playing the July 4th Fireworks Prochia with the Beach Boys. That's right, yes. And you're a drummer. Yes, I am. You know, can I, that's so cool. One of the greatest thrills of my life to play with, they're always my favorite, who's your all-time favorite band?

Quick. The Beach Boys probably. Oh, come on. What would, my favorite band? The Beatles, the Stones. The Beatles are great. Rolling Stones are great. I saw them in a concert once.

Yeah, they're great. I'm really more of a book guy. Will you come to a concert sometime? We'd love to. We'd love to. Paul McCartney said, God only knows from Pet Sounds is the greatest song ever written.

Do you agree with me that it's Barbara Ann? No, I think he was right. That's a perfect song. Perfect song. And, you know, I've been playing with the beach sports for 40 years now since before, you know, what year were you born? I was in 1982.

Yeah, so about three years after you were born, I started. That's crazy. And the world needs the music more than ever now. The optimism, the positive. You know, in the 60s, they were writing songs that, you know, they were just painting this tableau of optimism and Camelot and wouldn't it be nice and fun, fun, fun, fun. And the whole world, you remember, wanted to be us around that time because they, you know, they believed in this thing that the Beach Boys were putting out. Not so much anymore, but still, we're doing it and the crowds are great. And, you know, I always say Discord is at an all-time high and decency at an all-time low.

But when you, you know, have the Beach Boy music, you know, to bring people together and it doesn't matter what side of the fence you're on, how old you are, whatever it is. I've seen, you know, I've seen it for so many years now. Just a crowd go crazy for the band. I think, like, when I was a kid, I remember thinking, oh, like, the Beatles are the serious band and the Beach Boys are, like, silly and light. And then at some point, I learned, like, no, what's happening in Pet Sounds is shockingly technical and actually was, like, like an obsession in part because of the competition with the Beatles. Do you ever talk to the band about that? Yeah, we talk about it sometimes. I know that the Beatles heard pet sounds and then they did Sergeant Pepper after that. But Brian Wilson was obsessed with the Beatles as well. The Beatles heard, I think Bruce Johnston of the band took an acetate of pet sounds over to their hotel and played it for them and they flipped out, you know. In the 80s, everyone prayed that they too could be raised by three hilarious kind dads and a huge house in San Francisco instead of your dumb real house with your dumb actual family. But John Samos, you've had an incredible career across so many different shows and films, which is why we're going to play a classic love it or leave a game, which is, was I in this?

And here's how it works. We are going to ask trivia questions about your career. If you think you know the answer, you can raise your hand and we'll bring you the mic to reply. I don't remind you, this is an excuse to talk to John Stamos. All right, so here are the questions for you. This is your set of questions, and I'll read the ones that say Love It, and you'll read the ones that say, John. Okay.

Does someone here want to face the gauntlet of a trivia question? Oh, even before you hear it. Okay, come up. No, Paloma's going to come to the, Paloma's going to bring the mic to the... I'm running the show now. Okay. John Stamos is... Stand up. Look at the shirt.

Can you look at the shirt she's wearing? Oh, look at that. Oh, we have an... Uncle Jesse's shirt. That's so cool. Look at that. Go ahead. What's your name?

Christine. Christine. John Stamis' first role was Blackie Parrish on the legendary soap opera General Hospital in 1982, true or false? That's correct. Look at that. This is very sweet. This is very sweet.

She won't let go. What do you say? She's not letting go. She's not going to let go. We'll get security. Can we go to commercial? Yeah. Shut it down.

Shut it down. Now, you were going to enter your first semester of college, but you said, fuck it, right? I'm talking to you now. Oh, yeah. Well, I tried. I couldn't find that sign-up room for college. I know you smart guys can find that, but I didn't. And so my dad really wanted me to go to college and take over his hamburger business.

I worked at his hamburger joint. In fact, I got on General Hospital, and he still made me work on Sundays. And so when I called home, I said, I got this role. General Hospital. You can hear my dad in the back and going, tell them you can't work on Sundays. You're my Sunday guy. And I still worked during the week, and the show started to air, and people would come in and say, hey, aren't you the , no, give me a cheeseburger or anything. So, yeah, so I

didn't go to college, but I thought, I gotta become famous, so I, you know, so I did. Smart, smart. You did it. Yeah. Was General Hospital good training? Like, it seems so intense that you don't get to go back, you don't get a lot of takes, you have to go and get your shooting so much. Like this show? Yeah.

This show, yeah. This show is a lot like that. Yeah. Like a soap opera. Yeah, it's like a soap opera. It's, I think soap opera actors would think that it's insulting to say it was a training ground. But it was. There's some great actor. I work with Tony Geary quite a bit who played Luke.

And I was just, I learned so much from him. So there's great actors on there. It was a lot. I had like 20, 30 pages a day. But I just loved it because it was my first job. And I just, you know, it was so, yeah, I don't mean it. No, I can see how that can be like kind of perjart. But I mean, like, just as far as going on to other sets, like, these are sets where you have to know your shit.

You have to show up every day. You've got to be ready. You don't get the luxury of getting to learn it as you're doing it. You have to be there and ready. You know, that seems like a cool thing about that. I think a lot of, I learned a lot of discipline from that show, showing up on time and being nice to people. My dad, you know, kept me working there. And my dad was a guy who would treat the bus boy the same way he would treat his best customer.

And he really was that kind of man. And I loved him so. much. He was my hero. He passed away. You know, when kids, you know, think their parents are heroes and then eventually, they're like, oh, he's just a minute. Like, I never got to that phase. My dad was always cooler and bigger than life to me. And so

he, but he saw, he came out on the set and saw me talking to a crew guy and said, okay, you're ready. I'll let you quit. You go to work. That's cool. That's a nice story. Thank you. Is anyone who wants to go next? What's your name? Raisal. Raisel? That's a good one.

Do you want to do the next question? It's on the next page. I appeared in the 1980 music video for the Beach Boys, Help Me Rhonda, live at Nebworth, where you could see me briefly dancing off stage. Is that true or false? True?

It's false. Okay, yeah. It was Coquamow. It was Coquamow. Do we have a clip? That's not me. We're getting... Wait. There he is.

Oh, just a flash. Look at that point you got. It's so funny, because it sort of looks like he's hitting on me. Like, I'm playing like, and I kind of look at him in a sexy way, and he's like, hey, you, John. Who wasn't hitting on you in that era? Well, I played the drum set. I was in the Williams College Steel Pan Band. Oh, really?

With all the Jamaican students, but I didn't play the Steel Pan. I played the drum kit with the Steel Pan Band. So you must have been pretty good. I was fine. I think you should show up and sit in with us one day. Okay. That's a yes. Maybe not at the Hollywood Bowl.

No, I think we should start smaller. Somewhere. Start smaller than the Hollywood Bowl. Were you around, you know, the Beach Boys played for the 4th of July every year at the Washington Monument. And for 750,000 people or something like that. That was one of the first times I played with them in 85. That's cool. Yeah, it was, the monument was nice then.

I was, yeah. It was, the monument's the same. The monument's the same. The algae hasn't gotten to the monument yet. Boy, it'll be sad to see when the algae takes the monument. That'll be a swamp thing. I think, I wish you guys, I don't want to get political because I'll get in trouble. But, you know, will you guys put out a video?

I need you to put a video out of just the facts. Don't make jokes about it. Don't bullshit about it. Okay. Show video of him. Show facts, real facts. Show price, gas prices. Take pictures of gas stations if you have to.

Go and grocery stores if you have to. But make it so undeniably true. Don't fuck around with. jokes and no opinion about it. You know what I'm saying? So I can show my sister and the Republicans and my family and friends. Let's edit the jokes out of this episode

and get it to John Stamos' sister. But do you know what I mean? I know what you mean. I know what you're like you know the far right is not going to watch you or listen to you or Kimmel or Seth or any of this or these podcasters or these great guys on David Packman's one of my favorite. You know they're not getting to the people

that need to see this. Do you think? I think that, yes, I think it is hard to get good information in front of people. I think sometimes we overestimate the ways in which the problem is the facts that are getting to people and underestimate the importance of people deciding they want to see the facts, right? That there's no amount of, I think the deeper problem, right, is there are a lot of people that aren't really receptive to the facts because there's a, deeper truth that we haven't gotten to them yet is how I sometimes feel about it. Because

the problem right now is not that people don't know who Donald Trump is. I think that there's something else going on would be my feeling about it. Okay. But I don't think the video is a bad idea. I think we should still do it. Okay, let's do it. Uh, you all... I can't stop looking at your hair. Yeah. I mean, it's fantastic. They did a great job. Yeah. I think it's easier with curly hair. It is. Because you can put the curls in front. The curls in front. You can mess it up. You have, there's more room for error for sure. There's more room for error. Have you had any other surgery? Anything else?

I had my ears pin back. You did? No. Seriously? Yeah, when I was a little kid. Yeah, they were super out. Like a taxi cab with the doors open? Yeah, basically. Yeah, like Dumbo, basically. They were real Dumbo. They were big ears. They were big and they were out. Wow. And how do they pit? Let me see. Is there a scar in the back? You can see it. You can see it. How did they do that? They cut it open and they make the fold that wasn't given to me. Wow. How old were you?

Oh, they're like 12. Wow. And back they went. I don't know why we waited till right after the kids stopped making fun of me, but that's when we did. Like, hey, you know what a great time to do that was? Six, seven? No, let's wait until I'm 13. But were you bar mitzvah? Yeah.

Okay, so they're out in there. The ears were there for the bar mitzv. They were. I think it was after the bar mitzvah. So you were past 13. Yeah, yeah, it was 13. Do I have the fact check for you? No, you're right to check.

I need the facts. This is what the facts. This is what the facts. Don't get the facts. Just no opinion. Just give them the straight dope. Right. No joke.

Raw data. The ear date. The ears were out. They were out. Yeah. I'm sorry, but it was okay. It's great. It was good. Yeah, I think it was the right thing to do. Maybe it would be my calling card. You know, it would have been like, oh, you know, that guy with the ears. No, you don't want that. Nah, it was a good decision. I collect Disney stuff, as I said earlier, and I have a dumbero in my living room. Wow. But his ears are worse than you. Yeah, for sure. No, famously. Yeah, I don't. I think I'd hit terminal velocity if I jumped off of that diving board. And I, you know what I mean? I don't think I'd be able to swoop up. Yeah, I don't think I could swoop up. Let's do one more.

Right there, Paloma. Hi, what's your name? Max. Max. I'm Max. So nice to meet you. Max, I love your energy. I can...

I love your energy. Max, what about my energy? We do have chemistry. Oh, really? Oh, sorry. You're supposed to ask the question. Oh, yeah, I'm going to ask this one. Staring at Max.

John Stamos starred on Broadway in Gorvadol's The Best Man alongside James Earl Jones, true or false? True? That is true. I talked to James about perception. This is a heavy-duty political. Do you know that show, that Gorbied all play by chance?

Oh, you would love it. It should be out now. But it was a three-hour heavy drama. And here I am, toe-to-to-toe with one of the greatest actors ever, James Earl Jones. And we finished it. And I called him Big Daddy. I said, Big Daddy, I'm going to tell you, yes, little John. I said, you have changed people's perception of me.

you've made me really legitimized me. Here I am with you on Broadway, you know, with the greatest actor. I think people really see me in a different way, and you really changed people's opinion of me as we're walking. Open the stage door, and there was a bunch of people out there. Uncle Jesse, Uncle Jesse, say have mercy. And I couldn't look at him. I was like, oh, my God, everything I just said.

And I finally, I kind of looked up a little bit, and I could see someone talking to him going, James, could you say, Luke, I am your father into my phone for your thing? And we looked at each other and said, fuck it. Fuck it. What are we going to do? People love these characters. Let's embrace it, you know? That's great. That's a great place to leave it. Catch John Stamos with the Beach Boys at the Hollywood Bowl for the July 4th Firework Spectacular on July 2nd, 3rd, and 4th. We'll be right back.

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Hi. Hi. Hi. Welcome. Thank you. Sideways. Oh, thank you. Thank you for being here. Hi. Hi. Hi. I know you've got to go to John Simos. You can't, yeah, come on. I was going to wear that outfit and... But we're matching. Oh, yeah, yeah. Listen, so there was a memo. I think where are we robbers, bank robbers? Who's driving the getaway car?

It's like I'm not even fucking here. Hi, nice to meet you. Hi. So, you're in the agency with Michael Fastbender, Richard Gear, and Jeffrey Wright. But you're in a relation with Michael Fastbender's character in the series. What's the most annoying thing about Michael Fastbender? or in real life. How do we take this guy down a peg?

You know what's so annoying is that he's actually so fucking cool. That sucks. Don't you hate it when you meet these sort of handsome guys that get so much plot as for being good looking and they're actually charming and personal. Don't you find that frustrating? You know what? Actually, no.

Because you know what? No, because I'm not a hater. And you know, I love that. I love that. Because what's more annoying is like these charming, handsome guys and they're like pieces of shit. I much prefer like a charming, handsome guy, and he's actually like charming, handsome, completely unsurious, so fun to work with.

I'm right here. John, call your agents and tell them that you want us to work together. I would love it. So I can talk about you like this. But no, he's, you know, Michael is actually like really wonderful and, and also just like, he's just, there's no, there's no fucking frills. He's just like real. He's down to earth. I really love that.

He's Irish. We love the Irish. What a weird reaction from this side. They were like, oh. Was that sympathy or the excitement? Strange. You're like the Queens Guard or something? All right.

So you filmed in Morocco this season. What was your Morocco experience like? Oh my God, I love Morocco. What's crazy is the year prior I had been in Morocco. I went to Marrakesh for the first time. And when I was there, I was just like, I'm manifesting shooting in Morocco. And then agency season two.

They were like, we're shooting in Tanger and Rabat. And it was, it was magical. And it was amazing too because it's like, you know, sometimes you do something and you're only on location for like a second, but we were literally out there for like a month. And it was so nice. I loved it. I love Morocco.

That's so cool. You have to speak different languages on the show though. And didn't you have to speak Arabic? Is that right? Yes. That seems, how do you figure, what, how do you do that? do that? How do you have to learn to speak the language? How do you have to like feel how do you do that? Listen, you know, Arabic is first of all, it's I think one of the most beautiful languages in all of

existence and also the most yeah and also the best poetry, the most lit poetry. It's just, it's so romantic and amazing and difficult. It's like obviously I mean you're never going to sound like a native speaker when you're not a native speaker. It's just, you know, you can't fake it. So I was like How can we help me get as close to the mark as possible? And, you know, I'm actually really grateful that, you know, production, you know, these producers, you know, they really invested in us because I can't tell you, I mean, I'm always asked to do an accent. And I can't tell you how many times, like, all the accent work has just been me

coming out of my own pocket because I really care about it feeling authentic and sounding authentic and, like, honoring that culture. Like, I'm Jamaican. Any Jamaicans in the audience? No. We're in California. Wait, I saw someone, yeah, Susette, my head stylist. Ah, God.

But, you know, as a Jamaican, like, I'm always seeing, you know, people doing like, Jamaican accents and I'm like, who was on set for that? Was there anybody there? Like, what's going on? And it's because, like, nine times out of 10, there is not anybody there. Because, unfortunately, like, audiences, Western audiences, they'll just be like, just whatever sounds good to us. And when you're native, it's...

it doesn't sound good to you. And so I always strive to just like, how can I get at least as close to the mark as possible? And 101, David Glasser, he was like, as soon as, you know, we had our season two renewal, like basically almost immediately. And as soon as we had it, he was like 100% you can get lessons. So I was doing Arabic dialect lessons at the same time

because, you know, it's, when you're doing another language, it's, you know, there's so many different. and nuances, but also it's like just where the words sit in your mouth is completely different. And I wanted to make it so that at least when I'm on set, you know, I'm not spending all this time just trying to work on how to say the words. Like I was in season one. I can be more about just like what the story is because I've been practicing on how to say things and where everything is supposed to sit and having that comfortability with speaking the words.

John Stamos, can you do any accents? No. But you'll Greek, can't you? I'm Greek. Yeah. Can you do Greek accent? I can't do a Greek accent. Do you speak Greek?

Hello, Mary. Oh, yeah. So that's you doing Dick Van Dyke doing a British accent. Can you do accents? Oh, no. It's best not to try. I used to be able to do Ariana Huffington. Try Ariana.

Greek. Here we are. the 21st century and women have to sleep their way to the top. Like that was sort of the gist of it. You know, there I was on a catamaran with the cast of glee, like that kind of thing. So, and obviously it's killing in the crowd. What accents do you find, what are the more challenging ones for you? What are ones can you do?

You know, obviously the Arabic was probably my most challenging in terms of that. Because also Arabic, it's, you know, I mean also with every language. but people don't think about this. I mean, there's so many different dialects. There's not just Sudanese Arabic, but like, you know, Sudanese Arabic is its own thing. And so that was definitely challenging. But also what I found challenging,

I did a show called Bad Monkey, where I played Bahamian woman, and that was also challenging, you know, because also because as I said, Caribbean, you know, we are very, very critical, you know. And so it's like, You know, I was really working hard on that one. Are there any, have you, is there an example in your mind when you think of like,

I cannot believe that that is what was considered allowed to be a Jamaican accent? Like, what is like the, when you think of an example, like, the worst one, what comes to mind? It's, oh, if you don't want to say, say it anyway. I feel like John has one. I was trying to think, what are the Jamaican sled guys or something? Oh, cool, running. That movie upseted me.

Was it Jamaican in there? I wasn't brave enough to ask, but that's obviously what came to mind. That movie upset me, but you know, it wasn't even about the accent. It was just, you know, I mean, listen, we're making so many advances in our industry, thank God. But just like, there was just so many things that really upset me about that, that didn't even have to do with accent. I'm still angry about cool running. Just want you all to know. Angry.

Sorry, I brought it up. No, you were... You brought up Cool Runnings! He stepped on my... corn. Hey, I want to ask you something. Do you remember British Vogue spotlighting your efforts to keep an original ugly shoe alive? Do you know what I'm talking about? Because we were talking about a lot when we heard you were going to be on the show. Can we show the photo of the shoe? It's a shoe where your toes are, have individuals. My toe shoes. Your toe shoes where your toes are kind of visible. You have like their gloves, but for the feet where your toes are visible.

You know those kinds of shoes? Do you like those kinds of shoes? Obviously I love them. Are they comfortable or is it weird having each toe in a little prison? Do you know, here's the thing. But it's not prison. The thing is our toes are in prison in our normal shoes. Because like the foot is supposed to function in a certain way. And it's not, you know, like, you know, the body is so intelligent.

You know, it's like every single nerve is not just for like, oh, out, that hurts. But it's also because sending a signal to the brain to let it know which muscles to activate. And, you know, the order I get, the more I'm like, I'm interested in the integrity of my spine. Oh, yeah, for sure. Okay, my knees, my ankles, my hips, everything. And I, actually, I love these toe shoes. You know, this has been a thing that people have been asking about. I love my toes shoes.

I sometimes, like, I try to reach for another shoe, and I'm like, the toe shoes. I'm going to wear toes shoes. I've never worn them. John Samo said, have you... Yes. Your foot has to, like, get accustomed to, like, walking in it. At first, it might, like, hurt a little bit, and you're supposed to, like, work up to wearing them for several hours. That better grip?

Can you, you know, climb up? building or rob a bank rob a bank I mean that's the whole point right is you're supposed to be because our toes were supposed to be like literally be able to kind of like monkey it and and I've you should and I think it's like for me and listen it's tough because we're walking around all day on very very hard surfaces which is also not very natural so you know sometimes it doesn't work all the way if you're not at least walking on like some soft surfaces sand, grass, dirt. Love walking on those stuff.

Listen. So much better. We need it. I got to get these toes shoes. Start walking around the beach. It's a different life for me. A whole different life for me. My toes are in their little homes.

I'm walking on the water. John Stamos is there. We're wearing our toes shoes together. I'm playing with the beach boys. Yeah, let's do it. We could do it like a little photo like this. Yeah, that'd be cool. We're getting good ratings on those feet websites.

Footfinder. We can start an only fan for our feet. Yes. Boy. that's going to be so fun it honestly it seems fun yeah you won't get a full cut by the way

yeah oh yeah no that was understood that I'm a junior partner do you have feet no my feet aren't great I don't believe that they're not you're like this is that's your thing being cute

no no no no my feet are not they're not that good hot uncle I bet you've got nice feet look at me I sound like Quentin Tarantino and once again I've disappeared we'll be right back Hey, don't go anywhere. There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up.

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You can get 50% off your new system by visiting Simplysafe.com slash love it. That's half off at Simplysafe.com slash love it. There's no safe like SimplySafe. And we're back. What's between your leg? Oh. Oh, this? Yeah.

This is the egg of truth. Here's how it works. Inside of this egg. we have questions that probe sort of some of the deeper and harder questions in life itself and some stupid ones. And we're just going to ask them. All right? Okay.

And that's how it works. Here we go. First up. It's like panty hose or something would be in that. Yes, it does. Like those old panty hose things. I remember that. Candy should be in it.

We're so close to Easter. I hid so many eggs and stuffed them with so many things. An asteroid is heading towards the Earth. What is the length of time left on Earth, at which point you stopped doing skin care. So if the asteroid is going to hit in 10 years, are we still doing the full routine, we're doing the serums? If it's one year, are we still moisturizing? If it's going to hit in three weeks, are we still doing under-eye cream? When are we stopping the skincare and just saying, fuck it? I mean, I'm trying to look cute for the aliens. I'm like, they're landing

and I'm like, with my zip. Right till the end. Right to the end. So the asteroids is growing bigger in the sky and you're like, also I'm such a controlling person. I'm like, I can at least control this. Oh. So while it's ending, let me make sure that my cheekbones are snatched. Oh, that's nice. That's kind of a creature of routine.

Yeah. I like that. I like that. Live every day like your last. I would say, yeah, I would do it. It takes a minute to put some cream on. Drop the skincare routine, John. I wouldn't do it anymore. Okay, he's out. He's changed his mind. Yeah.

What is... I face the question. Do you know that he has hair plugs? They're not, we don't, they're not called, they're not, they don't call them plugs anymore. Wait, I'm sorry, but that's a slur in my community. We don't say gay hair plugs. We don't say the P word, we don't say the P word, all right, all right. What do you say?

What do you say? That was so, I think they call them follicular. What do they call them? They call it follicular unit extraction. Okay. That's what the process is called. I think they are, I guess they are flue. I think they're just follicle.

They just call them follicles. They get FUE. Get your foo. They don't cut the back. They used to cut like a football shape from the back of people's heads and lay it on the table and then take them out like that. And now they just take them out one of a time from the back, which is kind of interesting. It hurts a bit. But they give you a valium, and then in midday you get a Caesar wrap.

You sit like this for a while. You take a little drug that makes it happen faster. Then you see a wrap. Then you're face down for the afternoon. Kind of like getting a BBL, I think. Yeah, I think so. Well, maybe, no, no, so you start face down because that's where they get the hairs. Second afternoon, face up, post sandwich.

What did you say? A BBL. A BBL. John, don't tell them. You don't know what a BBL is? I know you date young girls. Is it? No.

Are you married? Yeah. He's married. Brazilian butt lift. Oh, oh, oh. Yeah, see, you know. No, I didn't know. So no one's ever said BBL.

Next question. What is something you... I might need one. What is something you could improve about yourself? You don't need one. We all saw you enter. What is something you could improve about yourself, but you've decided to say, fuck it.

The butt. For you, it's the butt. What about you? You don't need any improvement. It could be non-physical. This could be, I wasn't looking for just physical improvements. What's something about yourself? You know, like, I could be better at that,

but you know what? Now I'm not going to do the work. Oh. I have McDonald's on my way to the office a little too often, and I know that that's wrong. I know that that's wrong, but I'm enjoying earning the points in the rewards. We've got some Mackey's lovers in here.

They really got us. us with that fucking app. Cheeked, man. There's an app. Oh, there's an app. How many times did they ask you if you had the app before it worked? Like a lot.

These, they don't eat McDonald's. Look at these people. But the app is for what? Like ordering, like Uber Eats? You can, yeah, but you like earn points and rewards and you can every once in a while you get a free soda and hash browns. Just a free soda.

Well, and then when a Los Angeles-based team wins, free nuggets. It sounds like even the Air One membership is a bit more lucrative than that. I get 10% back on every purchase. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, you guys are all working like, yeah, but that's a lot.

10%. 10% on Aeroon. On Aeroon. When I'm trying to use points, I'm like, yes. How much do I owe? $10. Thank you. $10, my ass at Airwold.

For that you get a banana. But maybe like 90 instead of 135, which we like. Next question. When you feel a pain in your elbow, where is the pain? Is the pain in your elbow, in your brain, or does it not have a location? This is what you were talking about earlier. Pain receptacles. I was like, what was I talking about? Right? Like, if you're pain in the elbow. I feel like when I feel a pain in my elbow, it is in my

elbow, but what I'm learning from my osteopath is, it's probably to do with something that's happening in my neck or something like that. But it feels my elbow is hurting. Right. I feel I think I'm also very in tune with my body. I'm like, no, no, no. I know, like, where things are happening. Because I gave birth. Oh, really? Oh.

Yes, I gave birth. How many children do you have? Just one. How old? Six. Oh, that's beautiful. She's so cute. You guys want to take a picture?

Yeah. Just kidding. I'm not going to show you. You can't show them. John Samos. Quick, name five types of bird. Hummingbird, Blackbird,

a poloamablanca. a sparrow and an eagle. Boom. Jody, what is the ideal time to have dinner? 6 p.m. Yeah, that's right. That's right. Love early dinner. Love early dinner.

Why did I have to name five birds? She got, what kind of dinner? What time is dinner? I don't know why. Name five birds. Because we're all about men suffering and women having ease. Okay. Right, ladies? We deserve it.

John Samos, what's your... This man's nodding. He knows what's up. What an ally. Ally. What's your earliest memory? John Stamos. Probably going to Disneyland with my family. Oh, that's sweet.

And the nose job. And the nose job. You had a nose job? Yeah. He talked about it earlier. He had his ears pinned back. I did. You did?

Mm-hmm. They used to stick out. Now they don't. Isn't that cool? There's a little. scar behind us here. Check it out. It's fine. Hey, Jody, what's a conspiracy theory you 100% believe?

That's like his bird question, you know? Aliens. Aliens, you think, aliens? Aliens, 100%. But is it even a conspiracy theory anymore? I feel like something came out recently that was like, yes, we have seen or made contact with other species. I mean, it's just stupid.

Like, look at this huge universe. We think we're the only ones there makes no sense. Yeah, you're right Last question for both of you Do you eat food off the ground? No Yes Well, it's the five second rule

The 10 second rule I just got new floors So now it's 30 second rule New floors No No, no no no no My rule is Do people take their shoes off

Do you take their shoes off? Do you make people take their shoes off? I don't really care of my house Okay, so you cannot be eating You cannot be eating anything off the floor You're right. Why didn't I? Oh, yeah. I'm not doing it anymore. People have been changed. Here's my rule. Here's my compromise rule. But you take your shoes off. That's still stinky feet. Stinky feet versus what you have dragged in from the outside, I'll take stinky feet. You're right. You're right. My compromise proposal is simply to say,

if it's dry, you won't die, but if it's wet, best forget. And you can see Jody in season two of the agency out now on Paramount Plus. And we'll be right back. Regrets, I have a few. Then again, not too few to mention, which is why it's time for second thoughts. Here's how works. Our producers have given me a list of things I should regret about this episode. This current show that we're watching and being in.

If you have any second thoughts about tonight, we welcome them, because this is a show where we're going to, we acknowledge things where we want to, you know, we're like, you know what? We're not going to pretend everything was perfect. You know, we don't need to. First, I went pretty deep on New York City elections for an audience of L.A. based, on Stamos fans. They laughed, though. They got it. They were with it.

They were with it. I gave the audience permission to laugh at Jewish people, but forgot to retract it at the end of the show, for the bylaws of woke 2.0. Nobody seems to be watching Ellsbeth but me. What is that? Is that from Wicked? No, Elzbeth is a spinoff.

Elzbeth is a spin-off of the good fight, which is a spin-off of the good wife. And so it's a spin-off of a spin-off of the original show. Carrie Preston plays a lawyer who's solving mysteries, and it's a fucking delight. Have you watched The Hunting Wives, The Hunting Wives?

I'm on season two. Ooh. I haven't seen The Hunting Wives yet. What are you streaming these days? The Agency on Paramount Pass. Let's see, another regret. I told John Stamos that scientists are going to cut up my brain. it was before you got here.

But why is that a regret? I think that you should cut up your brain. You're very intelligent. Here's my question. These producers are writing your regrets, not you. But they're suggestions. They're suggestions. What do you regret?

I feel is, let's see, oh, I regret not knowing my favorite band. That's regrettable. That is regrettable. Well, it's funny, it's like I don't really have a, I would say that I have like, I love a lot of music, but I would never say I have a favorite.

You know what, actually. What are you looking at? Just thinking about it. No, I'm actually with you there because it's so hard on someone's like, what's your favorite band? And it's like, what's your favorite band? How can I just pick one favorite band? You know what I mean? Three.

Okay, favorite artists. I love James Blake. Love James Blake. I also loved, anybody in here love dance whole music. There's no Jamaican, so maybe not. Anyone? Wow. There's too many white people in this audience.

If you like people there, you don't listen to any dance whole music? It's a shame. I say to my son sometimes. I go, you're Jamaican me crazy. That's terrible. I regret that. Jody, do you have any regrets?

That's fine. Any regrets? No regrets. No regrets. No regrets. That's R-A-G-R-E-T-S. Oh, yeah. Thank you both so much for being here.

Before we go, I want to say a heartfelt thank you to Alan Pierre, Suba Argoal, and Jossi Koffman for a hilarious joke contribution to this show. In particular, I want to thank Jossie, who has written on this show for most of its run through every iteration through the pandemic, through the shows I did in my backyard, and it has helped shape the weird, joyful way we try to deal with what is ever happening this week. I couldn't have done this show without you. And if you asked some of the critics of the show,

I still don't. There are 130 days until the midterms. We'll be back next week with Mark Duplas and ex-Mayo. Thank you, John Seamus. Thank you, Jody Turner Smith. Love It or Leave It is a crooked media production. Our show is produced by Kendra James, Bill McGrath, Kelsey Gante, and me, John Lovett. Our production team includes Hallie Kiefer, Sarah Lazarus, Roman Borsalino, Peter Miller, David Tolls, Claudia Shang, Jay Banks, Gavin Purcell, and Matt DeGrope. And our staff is proudly unionized with the Writers Guild of America East.