Lovett or Leave It - The Mitch Is Back
Episode Date: July 15, 2026Lindsey Graham leaves in a hurry, Mitch McConnell takes his time, and the Midwest races to the nearest toilet. Plus, we are happy to hang around with the hilarious David Wain, Joe Lo Truglio, and Rac...hael Harris as we talk when to leave summer camp, how to succeed on Star Trek, and ways to navigate Los Angeles. Plus rants AND second thoughts? What an episode.For a transcript of this episode, please email transcripts@crooked.com.
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Welcome to Love it or leave it
It's love it or leave it
Welcome to Love It or Leave It
Live from Hollywood.
I'm John Lovett and I'm on that new Michigan produce diet
We're summer, got to tighten it up.
We've got a great show for you tonight, but first,
let's get into it.
What a week.
A U.S. Senator has shuffled off this mortal coil
over the weekend and twist.
It wasn't the one we expected.
See, I am alive, said Mitch McConnell,
bolting upright and causing the medical
examiner to issue a full body scream.
Yes, South Carolina Senator and secret
Rupal's drag race fan, Lindsay Graham,
died on Saturday evening
at the age of 71.
It came as quite a shock, as Graham seemed
like he was always in a younger man's
body.
According,
I would say, get comfortable
with what that was.
According to Axios, a person who spoke to the
Senator on Saturday night, urged him to
seek medical attention immediately, but Graham said he would do so Sunday morning after his
scheduled appearance on NBC's Meet the Press. A bitchy queen literally dying to be on television
cannot relate. President Trump hailed Lindsey Graham as a true American patriot on truth social
and ordered that all American flags across the country be lowered to, quote, half-mast through
Saturday. Half-mast refers to the lowering of flags on naval vessels, which Lindsay would have
appreciated the man loved seaman.
So, okay, Trump meant half staff, fine.
But also, and I seem to be the only person who actually cares about this, the president
of the United States cannot order the flags across the country to be lowered.
He does not control all of the American flags because this remains a free country.
His authority extends to federal flagpoles and the masks on government ships, and that is
it.
Besides, this is Lindsay Graham we're talking about.
He wanted the full pole.
South Carolina Governor Henry McMaster
appointed Graham's sister, Darling Graham Norton,
to serve out the remainder of her brother's term.
And I don't know why,
but it is simply not possible to hear this news
about Lindsay Graham's sister being appointed
to fulfill his term
and not picture Lindsay Graham in a dress in a wig.
Right?
Like, it's an incredibly powerful image
that this idea calls into all of our collective consciousness.
When you heard that Lindsay Graham's sister
was going to replace Lindsey Graham,
didn't you picture almost against your will?
Lindsay Graham and a kind of Barbara Bush-style dress
with pearls and a kind of Bob style, like old-school Republican wig, right?
Like, am I crazy?
Like, did you, am I alone?
Did you picture that, right?
No, shut up.
Anyway, here's the governor.
Lindsay took care of his little sister
in years long departed.
It's my honor to ask his little sister,
Darlene Graham, to finish his work for him now.
So Lindsay and Darlene Graham's mother died of cancer,
and soon after their father died of a heart attack.
Lindsay Graham was 22.
His sister was only 13.
He became her legal guardian.
And, oh, I guess you don't want to be reminded
that this flawed and ultimately tragic figure
also contained genuine humanity
because it makes the jokes feel a little bit
bit bad? Well, that's on you. This evil fag was a wonderful brother. He was also in the middle of
running for his fifth term, and the GOP will need to hold a special election to replace him on
the ballot. And his allies and opponents all agree. Graham left a big hole to fill.
South Carolina congresswoman, an advocate for mental health treatment by dint of her behavior,
Nancy Mace, finished dead last in the primary for governor a month ago. But she's
interested posting this Godfather clip on social media.
Just what I thought I was out.
They pulled me back in.
Hey, babe, no one's pulling you back anywhere.
I've never seen a person less pulled in my life.
Go enjoy your summer.
Have some fresh uncooked vegetables.
It is the season.
On Monday, Trump called into Fox News to eulogize the late senator.
Now, he had one bad moment.
That was, you know, the January 6th thing when he stood up,
all right, now I've had it.
That's it.
I can't do it anymore.
And then he called me like about 40 minutes later.
And he said, did I really say that?
I can't believe it.
And he took it back.
So I give him a 99 instead of a 100.
Mr. President, this is hardly the time to drag Lindsay Graham's memory through the mud
by reminding us of his failure to hang Mike Pence.
And it obviously ran counter to Graham's instincts.
He loved to see a man who's hung.
Graham once wrote a bill to cap greenhouse gas emissions with John Kerry.
And he was part of a gang of eight in 2013.
proposed a pathway to citizenship for undocumented immigrants.
Gang of 8 was also his favorite porn hub, search.
He absolutely hated Trump.
There's a lot of quotes by Graham mocking Trump,
but it's worth seeing Graham's full plea from December of 2015.
What is your reaction to hearing what Donald Trump says?
I'm disgusted.
Well, I'm going to talk to the Trump supporters for a minute.
I don't know who you are, and I don't know why you like this guy.
I think what you like about him, he appears to be strong.
when the rest of us are weak.
He's a very successful businessman,
and he's going to make everything great.
He's going to take all the problems of the world
and put them in a box and make your life better.
That's what he's selling.
Here's what you're buying.
He's a race-baiting, xenophobic, religious bigot.
Because what Mr. Trump is doing,
and I don't think he has a clue about anything,
he's just trying to get his numbers up
and get the biggest reaction you can.
He's putting our soldiers and diplomats at risk.
He's empowering the enemy in this ban.
if it's actually enacted, would take people who've been interpreters who came to our side in Iraq and Afghanistan
are under siege in their own countries and basically becomes a deftanance for them.
And you know how you make America great again? Tell Donald Trump to go to hell.
That's great. And then Trump won. And Graham became among Trump's closest allies.
In fact, Graham got so jealous of Trump's other best friend that he had him murdered in jail.
and made it look like a suicide.
Graham was pretty explicit about his motivations.
He wanted to keep his job, stay relevant,
and he believed he could harness
what he called Trump's magic for good
against Trump's dark side.
And now he's dead.
Do we think Graham succeeded?
There's a quote from him reported by the Atlantic this week.
He said,
When I was first elected to the House,
I looked for the they.
They who run things, they who know how things really work,
they who know what they're doing,
but I couldn't find the they.
He keeps looking in the Senate,
the White House, what I finally realized is that there is no they. There's only we, and we usually
don't know what the fuck we're doing. What he's talking about are the adults, and on some level,
I think he's talking about parents. I do. And just as there's no one once we become adults and
parents ourselves who secretly know what to do, there's also no one to tell you how to be.
You can give up your principles and sell your soul, and no one will stop you. No alarm will go
off. No one will protect you as you become a vassal for a fraud until one day.
you die, and that fraud you once despise, but then embraced, despite knowing in your bones that it was
wrong, he gives you a number grade to sum up your entire life, says you love the outdoors and
sucked it golf, briefly had a conscience, but don't worry, it didn't last, before he hangs up
and continues to do exactly what he would have done had you never sold out in the first place.
So, RIP, Lindsay Graham, I'll see you in gay hell, where the diacokes are flat, and the boobs
are enormous.
Speaking of people you might see in hell, on Sunday, Mitch McConnell's team,
Finally provided proof that the senator is alive and, well, just alive.
There's the photo.
Come on, give me more of a smile, said the photographer to the two people off camera
pulling the strings attached to each side of Mitch McConnell's dead face.
The photo shows the senator propped up in a hospital bed next to his wife.
He's holding the Sunday Wall Street Journal sports section,
a tactic borrowed from hostage videos.
They had planned to upload a video as well, but the circling vulture
kept swooping down, swooping into the shot.
The image was accompanied by a lengthy statement that also explained his prolonged silence.
He said, you all know how folks of my generation often hesitate to share the vulnerability
that comes with growing older.
Even in the public eye, I feel that same instinct.
I can't help it.
The statement says McConnell plans to get back on the Senate floor as soon as possible.
It continues, I can't wait to catch up on the news right after I eat this delicious
leafy green salad from Michigan.
Speaking of needing a guilt-free reason to get a side of fries,
an outbreak of a parasite that causes explosive diarrhea
has led to over 4,000 cases across Michigan and Ohio alone.
Let's just say the Cleveland Browns are heading to the bowl.
The number of reported cases in Michigan
doubled from Friday to Monday.
As a result, Michigan has been downgraded
from a flyover state to a fly-around state.
The outbreak may even be worse than what's reported
due to doge cuts.
The CDC has lost a quarter of its workforce,
and the Trump administration scaled back the system
that tracks food-borne illnesses.
I warned you, said the CDC's former chief diarrhea detective.
I knew the name seemed dumb to Elon,
but it was a serious job.
The parasite,
the chief diarrhea detective cannot get any respect in this administration.
We're making fun of him,
shoving him in a locker, putting signs on his car.
The chief diarrhea detective is an important job.
You didn't realize how important
until everybody got diarrhea.
The parasite is in airborne.
but spreads through food.
It's been found in berries, bag, salad mix,
pre-cut vegetables, fresh herbs,
and it says here, that thing you just ate.
Symptoms include weeks of watery diarrhea,
fatigue, cramps, bloating, and other gastrointestinal issues,
said Jewish Americans, and how do you know if you have it?
Per the Washington Post on Tuesday,
federal and state authorities are investigating Taco Bell
as a vector in Michigan's outbreak.
When reached for comment,
the Taco Bell Chihuahua said,
Yoquero, Saltines, and Gatorade.
While the link hasn't been confirmed, multiple Taco Bell locations have voluntarily removed lettuce and tomatoes from their menus.
But the lettuce and tomatoes are why I go to Taco Bell, said a serial killer.
Explain to Taco Bell, who cares? Just the shit that falls out. We don't think, let's give it up, Taco Bell. Never put them back.
Why are we all pretending we want the lettuce and tomato on these things? Shut up.
Explain to Taco Bell spokesperson, the last thing we want is for people,
to associate Taco Bell with diarrhea.
Speaking of problems that are airborne,
on Friday, Trump's Justice Department
issued subpoenas to several New York Times journalists
who reported on security concerns
related to Trump's new plane,
which was gifted to him from Qatar.
Yes, had it not been for this reporting,
we would have no reason to doubt
the hastily renovated, used airplane
given as a bribe by a corrupt emir
might pose a security risk.
But have they found the electronic
moderating devices, said a Qatari spy. Who said that? replied Trump alone in the airplane's
beautiful marble bathroom. According to the reports, Trump used the old Air Force One instead of his new
present after the Secret Service expressed concerns that the Katari plane lacked the advanced
security features necessary to protect the president, said the Secret Service. Also,
seems like a suspicious number of trap doors to include in the floor of Air Force One. Trump enlisted
FBI director Cash Patel to personally head up the investigation,
with Patel canceling a trip to Chicago
to see his country singer-girlfriend perform.
Said Trump, you can miss that, right?
It's like a son's wedding or whatever.
And finally, the great actor Sam Neal,
known for his roles in Jurassic Park,
the hunt for Red October,
and, in a movie that absolutely fucked me up,
Event Horizon, has passed away at age 78 in Sydney, Australia.
That's weird. I haven't seen him around heaven yet,
said Lindsay Graham, being dipped by his feet
into a lake of lava by a giant shrieking pig monster.
We've got a great show for you tonight.
And we'll be right back.
Hey, don't go anywhere.
There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up.
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And we're back.
David Wayne and Joe LaTrulyle will be out in just a moment.
But first, I will be kicking off CricketCon weekend with Love It or Leave It Live
in Washington, D.C. on Friday, November 6th at the historic capital turnaround theater.
And the next day, I'll be at the all-day CricketCon on November 7th.
So come be part of CricketCon.
It's a great time.
It's a great chance to hang with a bunch of people fighting to protect democracy,
fighting to be part of this great community.
We will have just had the election.
We'll know how it ended and get ready to go into the primaries and the presidential race to come.
So get tickets for Love It or Leave It Live, and the all-day cricket con at crookedcon.
At crooked con.
All right.
Please welcome to the stage.
My two celebrity hall passes, besides myself, of course.
What does that mean?
It's David Wade and Joe LaTrulyo.
Hi, go to see you and get in here.
Hello, hello.
Hi, everybody.
Thank you for coming on.
So you just made a new movie, Gail Daughtry and the Celebrity Sex Pass.
Yes.
So let's start with this.
Yeah.
Who are your celebrity sex passes?
Oh, my goodness.
Oh, boy.
Well, hmm.
That's a stumper.
That is a stumper.
I'm sorry.
Has this not been asked of you?
It has.
And yet there's never a good answer, and I'll tell you why.
Because if I named an actual famous person that I actually went to have sex with, that would be very awkward and creepy.
And so then I guess I could make a joke.
But now it's too late for that, now that I've torn it apart.
I'll tell you what.
I'll tell you what.
I'll tell you what.
I always had a crush on Daphne from Scooby-Doo, the animated Daphne.
Oh, cool.
Yeah.
Do you know, does anyone who animated is a good direction to go?
Like I thought Aladdin, when I was a kid, a boy, Aladdin.
Right? He was the guy.
His legs went all the way up.
He got abs.
Speaking of that sort of thing, do you remember the show Sid, the Science Kid?
Yeah.
So there was the girl on there that wore the sweater and had the glasses.
And that really gets me going, and I was very excited about that.
But that was on when I was already a parent of kids who were watching it.
So it almost seems too late.
And also she was in nursery school, this character.
But it was more the clothing.
Right, they look.
I should quit while I'm ahead.
Yeah, I always, I didn't know that I had a, I didn't understand that I was gay.
And so when I would see characters on TV shows growing up, I would just think I wanted to be them.
Sure.
And so then I would go to the mall and I'd go to structure and try to recreate what Zach Morris was wearing.
And, you know, a yellow T-shirt under a flannel looks so cool there in the streets of whatever that high school was.
Bell, save Bell School, the high school.
But when I did it, I look like a full.
fucking clown.
Yeah, because he didn't go
to Save Bell School.
I didn't go to Save Bell School.
So, we were realizing
it's, Gail Daughtry is a play on
Dorothy Gale.
This film is a play on Wizard of Oz.
Yes, it is.
But it's really,
it's more like its own thing,
but then it just sort of becomes
kind of structurally
Wizard of Oz in a fun way.
It's kind of like Easter eggs about
Wizard of Oz.
It's like a big Easter egg.
Yeah.
What I like about this movie is like,
the idea of the
Library's sex pass. It's like a funny thing people talk about. Right. But if it in actual life,
it's not really meant to be taken literally. Right. And that's what the movie's about. What if somebody
suddenly both had the opportunity and the balls to actually do it? And then this guy, her fiance,
actually has meets and has sex with, and I'll spoil it, Jennifer Aniston in the movie. And then,
and then she's distraught and she decides that she's in Hollywood on a trip. And then a psychic says to her,
Hey, if you find your celebrity sex past John Hamm, that'll even the scales and will save your relationship.
And so she goes on this journey to find and have sex with John Ham.
Wow.
Yeah.
And it's a little like, hey, what's it for John Hamm, you know?
Right.
He's got sex.
In the end, sex.
But, you know, guys love sex.
Guys love sex.
Speaking for myself.
Oh, so great.
So great.
Especially that end.
That part at the end.
What is the end?
Oh, my God.
That's the, right.
Right. And then you kind of lose interest in sex for a while.
For a few minutes, yeah.
For a, yeah.
Wow, it must be nice.
A few days, whatever it is.
Yeah, so you've both been making comedies long enough
that you have this fan base that's, like, so excited for what you're doing,
and you've been making movies, like, is it, at this point, like,
it's harder and harder to make a movie.
True.
Do you find that, like, you have, like, how have you found your way to navigate this sort of evolving
and, like, increasingly?
convoluted system in which fewer and fewer things are being made.
I don't have any good answer for it, but I will definitely agree that, especially comedy
feature films, original kind of feature films are rarer and rarer, and studios basically gave
up on them.
And so all I ever do is just hope for the, you know, I write what I want to write and hope
for the best.
Yeah, a lot of it is just kind of trying to make your friends laugh, getting together, trying to,
you know, come up with an idea that's fun to do.
And then if you kind of make your friend laugh, then maybe.
Maybe you'll have something worth shooting.
And as far as like the landscape goes, yeah, if it ends up, you know, the last movie I did
ended up as a Netflix movie, and this one somehow got a theatrical release, which I'm thrilled
about because it really should be seen in a theater and people are loving it.
But who knows?
And each one takes a long time, and hopefully as platforms keep changing, things will evolve, but
people will always want to laugh.
So you said that you came up with the first draft of this
and the concept for two more during a seven-day sprint.
So what's it like not having ADHD?
No, that's the opposite.
It is the ADHD.
It's because there's no other way to do it for me.
Like if I've given myself a year to write a movie, it's never going to happen.
If we say we lock ourselves in a room, seven days like you're doing a film shoot,
12 hours a day, there's nothing else to distract, nothing to interrupt.
Then we get a first draft done.
Sorkin said that he would lock himself in a room at the four seasons,
do the Coke until it ran out, then right till the new Coke came.
Right.
That was his secret?
That was his secret.
That was the story of New Coke.
That's how he walks out and he says, I think there's at least two things in this.
He does a lot of walk and talk.
Well, what has Sorkin ever done?
Really.
I mean, what has Sorkin ever done?
Has he ever really achieved much?
Yeah, name one.
Name three things.
Name seven movies.
Name 20 movies that he did well.
Can only name 15.
How did you get Jeddiv Arneson and John Hamm on board?
Well, we were just lucky enough to have cross paths with them at different points over the years.
And, you know, we're so great and funny.
And, and no.
People are dying to work with us.
But we just basically said, do you want to do this riff on your own playing yourself in a weird, funny way?
and they were incredibly game,
as were many other celebrities that are in this movie.
So it's also about to be the 25th anniversary
of Wet Hot American Summer.
Is there any plans for the anniversary?
Yeah.
Yeah, we're doing a show out here, August 8th, I think, right?
There's a big outdoor screening and a concert with our...
We have this middle-aged dad jam band,
and we're doing...
And there's going to be...
the cast panel, but then there's also
focus features is doing a re-release.
They're putting it in theaters all over the
country on August 14th,
and it's like, it's going to be
in something like 800 theaters at least,
and the original movie when it first came out
was in two theaters at first, and it
expanded to like 10, so
this is very exciting. What was...
The step up. It's a step up. Yeah, that's more.
By a lot. That is more.
By a lot. Math-wise.
It, like,
what was your experience
of the movie, kind of being small,
having this small release and slowly becoming a cult class.
Like, when did it start to feel like, wow, we did it?
Like, yeah, like, it didn't, you know, people didn't maybe know about it
or it wasn't as big as we hoped it would be,
but it became one of those movies that, like, had purchased.
My memory of it of when it caught on was when it was released on DVD,
and I don't even know if it was on Blu-ray,
but the DVDs seemed to float around colleges and college dorm rooms
and, you know, and all of a sudden it was this, like, cult film,
which was really nice to,
See, because at first it was not that.
It was incredible.
We made this movie for very little, did nothing.
It essentially wasn't released.
So you move on, and that's like most indie movies.
And then two, three years in, people are like the buzz starts building.
These midnight screenings, people are dressing up and lining up around a block.
And then little by little, over the years, by the time we did this sequel series on Netflix,
It was like this unanimously heralded cult classic.
We're like, oh, I guess it is.
It's crazy.
It's amazing.
That's cool.
Do you think that's going to happen to my failed TV show?
Yes.
It's going to happen.
Hell yeah.
That's what I'm hearing.
It's taking a long time.
It's taking longer.
You need patience.
It's been 12 years.
Right now, I think you can only get a DVD if you paid a print one.
Is that a bad sign, you think?
No.
If you're in Region B or something?
Yeah, you've got to get it printed for.
yourself, but you can customize it, so that's kind of cool, but I think that's true of any video.
I'm going to order, I'm going to order it. Custom printed DVD of your old show.
Well, thanks for saying that. Thanks for saying that. Now, David, you were not initially excited
about your first summer camp experience. True. I went to this place called Camp Modin in Maine,
and my first summer, my parents came halfway through, and I begged them crying to take me home.
And they said, no, you need to stick it out. And I'm so glad they did because
not only did I have an incredible many years at summer camp, but I made my whole career out of it as well.
Wow, yeah, so it was good for commerce.
You couldn't have known that at the time.
Joe, did you have a good or bad camp experience?
I didn't go to the overnight camps.
I grew up, I was born in New York, but grew up down in South Florida.
I went to a sea camp, which was the only overnight camp I went to, so just a weekend.
And they said, hey, we're going to go to this lagoon, and there's going to be some very small little lemon sharks, little nurse sharks, no more than a foot or so.
And they were right, but they didn't tell me that there was also swarms of Cassiopeia jellyfish that were also in the lagoon.
Sounds like an utter nightmare.
It was an utter nightmare.
But luckily, you know, they said it doesn't hurt too much, but they were wrong.
It did hurt.
I would downgrad it from C camp to D-minus camp.
Hey, hey, that's the type of stuff.
Got them.
That's the type of stuff.
You're nailed.
Got them.
But anyway, yeah.
Speaking of camp season,
so there's a kismet to your being here
because it is the anniversary of Wet Hot American Summer.
The kids are in summer camp.
And coincidentally, my sister sent me a series of letters
that my nephew had sent from camp.
Okay?
And I'll just read one example.
These are real letters.
I'm going to read them.
I have permission.
From your nephew.
From my nephew to his parents.
His mom, your sister.
To his parents, his sister.
My sister, his mother.
You get it.
First letter begins.
Everything we did so far was not very good.
The meals are bad.
Staff are not that good.
Have done nothing fun.
Went to sleep very late because nobody would stop talking.
12 a.m.
Oh, cried a little today, too.
Are you picking me up today, Monday?
If not, come pick me up as soon as possible.
Tomorrow, Wednesday, before lunch, please.
I hate camp.
Let me know when you were coming.
Love Bennett.
Oh, God.
Poor Bennett.
And yet I can relate. I understand.
Is that, can I ask, is that like a weekend, a couple days in?
I believe this was day one.
Yeah.
That was a day one missive.
Now, then there were reports that he was having a nice time at camp.
Plot thickens.
And we're going to just, I'll just, this will be, we'll just jump to the final letter.
And it reads, I hate it here.
Nothing is fun.
Come pick me up from this prison now, please.
I am done giving it a chance.
I am done being positive.
Please tell me when you were picking me up.
Day time, Monday.
I do not want to wait until visiting day for you to pick me up.
Please, Monday.
Text the person you are talking to to make sure I am okay.
I'm on the brink of finding my own way out of this prison.
Oh, my God.
Come pick me up as soon as possible.
I'm miserable, having no fun and really want to leave.
Come pick me up, please.
Wow.
So here's a question.
What did my sister do?
And what would you do?
Which is why it's time for a segment we're calling,
should this miserable child suck it up?
Okay.
I would say after the first letter, 100% suck it up.
First letter, first day, let it ride.
I would agree with that.
Half the kids are writing that letter after the first day.
Second letter, more complicated.
Second letter, I still think he's got to suck it up.
Wow.
I think you, if, yeah, he wants to escape,
but I think adversity is good.
How old is...
He's 11.
Yeah.
All right.
So I have a 10-year-old, and, you know, he didn't want to go to a camp because he had a
scratch on his knee, and it was just a scratch.
And I said, we have to, we have to go.
I've got things to do, like, you know, scroll and stuff.
And so he ended up going, and I think it helped.
The summer to scroll.
That's right.
So you went.
Sorry, you picked him.
No, no, he went.
I dropped him off the camp, he went, and he was okay.
He's okay. How was it?
And he's like, it was fine.
The scratch didn't hurt.
And I, you know, I said, of course it didn't hurt.
Perhaps the scratch was some kind of an excuse to say he didn't really want to go because he was a bit scared.
Perhaps.
I don't want to impute anything.
He was feeling a little lazy.
But that's what I'm saying.
Scared and lazy.
Maybe that's how I live in that space.
You have to remember, no matter how bad it is, it's still a place that your parents are paying for you to go and have, like, leisure activities.
It's, it can't be.
I mean, it can be bad.
It can be terrible, but I don't know.
So here's another story.
This is from Hallie, our head writer.
One weekend at Brownie Camp, which is the Brownie is the Girl Scout level for third grade, for those that don't know.
A friend of mine and I had to take a flashlight out into the woods at the dead of night to the terrifying gross, unlit porta-potty-style outhouse.
My friend went first, opened the door, stepped inside, was silent, and then turned around and said, I can't find the toilet.
I laughed so hard I peed my pants, and everyone found out about it when I had to get a plastic bag from our troop leader for my pee pants.
that's a great story but I would say also a classic
that's not a leave camp story
you got to stay I think that's right I think that's right
you know I just remembered I went to a place called the country school
with Craig Weddard when I was 10 or something
and it was a farm Amish camp and it was awful
and you did there was no electricity and you had to
bathe at the end of the week in four inches of dirty water that everyone else
bathed in and you just shoveled poop all day and I hated
every second of it. But I didn't even think to ask
to go home. It wasn't a work camp
or any type of labor camp that you
accidentally. Was it for dissidents?
It was like to have
the Amish experience.
But we found out it was a fake Amish family
that was in the trailer at night watching TV
and stuff. It was crazy.
Honestly, I respect that so much.
I think that's awesome.
They're selling the candles you're making.
What a racket. Right. All right. Next up we
have Jay, also on the
Love It or Leave a Team. He says,
when I was 11 or 12, I went to Boy Scout camp and didn't poop for a full week due to terrible anxiety.
I was a little gay boy who hated being in the woods.
I called home, collect everyday crying.
At first, they would encourage me.
This is a new experience.
You'll be fine.
But eventually, they would answer and say, we're not picking you up really quickly,
so it wouldn't charge them for a collect call.
That is so funny.
Later I found out my mom, dad, and stepmom had met to discuss letting me come home, but decided I needed to stay and tough it out.
Were they right to let this miserable child suck it up?
I just was explaining to my son who's at camp this summer, what to collect call is.
Anyway, this guy.
Stick it out.
Stick it out.
Finally, this is from Amy and Dallas from the friend of the pod Discord.
I was electrocuted in the shower when I was at church camp in Texas in the 70s.
This is the kind of shit.
There was a short in the water pump and they told us to get out of the showers immediately.
Being the daughter of a rabid environmentalist, I had to turn the water off first.
Big mistake.
Next thing I knew, I was being electrocuted, and my hands were stuck to the metal handle.
AC, that's dangerous.
That's no good.
You want to get fired off, like, from Jurassic Park.
Yeah.
You want to get attached to it.
That's bad.
It's real bad.
Fortunately, a counselor wrapped a towel around my waist and pulled me off.
I wasn't permanently injured, but I was freaked out and wanted to go home, but for some reason they wouldn't even let me call home, let alone go home.
needless to say, I stayed dirty the rest of the camp.
Well, staying dirty, that's a class.
I mean, this deserves like, you know, Navy SEAL 6.
Get her out of there.
Get her out of there. Get in there.
Danger.
Yeah, that's.
This is danger.
You know, this is different.
Yeah.
Sometimes, the only, the only caveat I'll say is I've heard stories like this.
And then somebody else who was there was like, actually it was nothing like what she did.
Like there was, she said electrocuted, but she really just like, you know, bumped her head for a second.
I believe women.
Just a great physical community.
Fair enough.
Thank you, David and Joe.
Catch Gail Dodger in the celebrity sex pest in theaters now.
Go to David Wayne.com for tickets to the middle-aged dad jam band tour.
Also, L.A. get tickets to the special wet-out American summer,
253 reunion screening at streetfoodsinema.com.
And we'll be right back.
Yeah.
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And we're back.
Please welcome to the stage.
She's been in more comedies and
shake a stick at.
It's Rachel Harris.
Hi, welcome.
Come on in.
Hi, Rachel.
Hi.
Welcome. So nice to have you.
Thanks for having me.
It's nice to see you.
This rugs a mess. I'm sorry.
Yeah, but I just like that you're like
just frogging it up there.
Yeah, I like to get up.
I like to move around.
That's, yeah.
No, no, no, don't change.
It's never happened.
But so, you and Joe, coincidentally, just were in a show together, right?
And we were debating whether or not we were able to talk about it.
We've decided we mostly can.
And so it was Star Trek.
Yes.
You're in Star Trek together.
Yeah, we did Star Trek Strange New World.
And I understand that you're on Star Trek, which must be stressful, just because it's a lot of lingo.
And then all of a sudden, and you showed up and you did not, you were, it was a different scene than you expected.
Yeah.
So what happened?
Yeah, it was the first day of shooting.
And Joe and I gratefully were in the scene together.
But I got to set and I looked at the call sheet and I, this scenes are very similar.
Like some of them, like we kind of do the same thing, different.
And so I just, I just prepared the wrong scene.
and I had a thought for a moment
that I thought, oh my God, I didn't prepare the right scene
and the one that I did prepare
had a ton of cool Star Trek lingo in it
that is not, I'm not used to speaking, Trek.
Right.
You know, so I had a moment where I thought,
I'm just going to pretend
that I know which scene I'm doing
and try to learn it really quickly.
And I realized that was not going to be a good idea.
Because of all the lingo, it's very specific.
You have to know where the phasers are set to
and where the power's going
and where the shields are, the percentages.
But she crushed it.
It was crazy.
But you crushed it.
I can't wait to see it.
The one thing that I'll say,
yeah, you would get, buckle up.
No, the one thing I was going to say
was that I had, you know,
it's nice being, having worked a lot
because David and I have done films together as well.
And it's really great to have,
the great thing about having Joe there
was that I knew that I could be honest.
And so I just simply said to the first AD and to the director, I said, I didn't prepare the right scene.
And they were so, I was so glad I did because they said, well, we'll move the day around and we'll give you some more time to learn it.
And then Joe, who was in scene with me, was so great and just sat there and ran it and ran it.
But it was all so great because he was like, I'd be shooting my pants right now, too.
You know?
You know what, though?
It just is a lesson that if you just ask for help sometimes, people want to be nice.
You know, it's not, we're not allowed to get each other.
They weren't angry, but yeah.
Yeah, that's true.
I think you're, and that's on a bigger scale.
Macro level.
Yeah, thank you.
I feel like this is, love it or leave it.
We want to talk about big things.
We've got to talk about big things.
So you've been in three Christopher Guest movies.
You're Best in Show, A Mighty Wind, and for your consideration.
You, how is it, what's it, how is preparing for those movies different than, say, preparing a lot of jargon for Star Trek?
Oh, well, just that.
I mean, like, the memorization of the scenes is really, is, that's the hardest part for me.
But the difference, though, with doing a film where you're improvising is you have the bullet points, but then the pressure is always on you to be funny.
And the curse of death is trying to be funny, right?
So you just have to come prepared, know what your point of view is, and then hope for the best, and just listen.
and respond honestly in character.
And I mean, I love it.
It's just, you know, you just have to listen and do your part of me.
But I mean, also you are uniquely one of the greats at that.
Like, not everybody can do that.
Well, that's very sweet.
And he's right.
No, he's right.
No, he's right.
He's totally right.
No.
Are there people that have been, like, intimidating to do those kinds of scenes with,
people that, or that, like, you felt, like, nervous about
because they were such legends or who, and then, like, what was that like?
Oh, yeah.
No, I remember.
doing for your consideration.
Every time I say it, I get choked up.
Getting to work with Catherine O'Hara was so amazing.
She was just so kind and everything you'd want her to be.
And we shared a dressing room, and there was like an accordion door that we could have closed.
It was like, first of all, we didn't really have dressing rooms.
We had like honey wagons, and then we all hung out in one big green room.
But I was never nervous with Catherine, though.
Catherine was always like, you know exactly what you're doing, and it'll be fun.
But the one person, when Ricky Jervase was just first coming up, he was in for your consideration.
And I remember just wanting to, like, say one line to him in like a big group scene.
And I couldn't.
Why?
Because I loved him in the office so much.
And I just thought it was, I love British humor so much.
and that form of comedy, I think it's so, you know, underplayed and fantastic.
And I just, that was, I mean, you ask if there's someone that I was feeling a little insecure around,
and he was a big one.
And then we did a film together.
We did an idea of the museum together and became really good friends, and that was really lovely.
I was going to make a joke about how, and, you know, like Joe, he's famously nice,
Ricky Jervais.
Yeah.
Yeah, like Joe Luchuglio.
They're kind of like, sort of, you're the kind of American Ricky Jervais, sort of personality
by them.
Sort of culturally personality-wise, that's the niche.
That's my niche.
Nice guy.
Yeah, same kind of energy.
Two nice guys.
Two nice guys.
But I also think when you're working with your peers, you also want to make your peers
laugh.
You know, you want to be funny and effortless.
And David's directed me and party down.
Do you remember you directed that?
That was really great.
Yeah, and he was so wonderful in that.
But also, that was like, whenever you're coming on to, like, a set and you aren't a regular on the show, but you're a guest on the show,
that's, I think, when it's kind of scary, when you want to do really well.
And it's nice that, you know, people like David and Joe and everybody are, you know, it's really fun when you have, like, friends that you get to work with.
When you're doing Star Trek, do they make you say it exactly as it is on the page?
Um, they were pretty tight.
They were pretty tight.
They were pretty tight with, they weren't Aaron Sorkin.
No, no, no.
It wasn't Arthur Miller, but, you know, it just was like, right, right.
But it was, um.
You could put some handles on there.
You could be like, uh, oh, it, mm.
Yeah.
But you can't really, no words.
We did a lot of gesticulating.
Yeah.
You know, like that's right.
But when the scene in particular that I didn't know my, that I was struggling with my lines,
I really didn't know my lines.
And I, I, uh, Ethan Peck.
plays Spock and he's so, you know, emotionless.
What, did they fire Leonard Nimoy?
They went with somebody younger, Hollywood.
This fucking town.
This is this town.
They did, but he felt so bad because every time I would fuck up, remember, he was so
stoic.
And he would say, I'm so sorry, I can't.
Like, we'd break and he'd go, I'm so sorry, you're dying.
He's like, I can't give you, like, any emotion to, like, look at you and be like,
I know.
Because of the character.
Yeah.
Because of the character.
You should say, you're half human.
Yeah.
Give me half of what you got.
Spock famously is a roiling cauldron of deep and enormous emotion just beneath the frozen exterior.
Yeah.
It's actually, yeah, it's a deep conflict inside of the character as you tell him that.
You're also on a daily show.
I was.
And famously, Stephen Colbert said that one aspect of being corresponded on the daily show is leaving your soul behind.
Yeah.
Did you do that?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was hard because I grew up in Ohio.
And the Daily Show then was like, it wasn't as, I want to say,
because it was early 2000s, it wasn't as like the two political parties weren't as polarizing.
George W. Bush was in office.
It seemed.
Beloved.
Beloved.
Belloved.
It just wasn't as, I mean, well, I remember I was flound.
lying across the country on assignment doing a field piece when they started the war.
And they were like, you're in the air.
And they've just started a war.
And it was kind of scary.
Yeah, then things got tense.
Things got real tense.
But they weren't necessarily going after.
It wasn't Republicans that they were going after.
It was more just like people that were people that were very self-righteous.
And we were calling them out, you know, taking the piss out of that.
And I loved doing it, but at the same time, sometimes people just didn't really understand what we were doing.
And I felt terrible.
Like, it was like leading them into a trap.
And I famously, once I finished, when I left the Daily Show, I went to do Starsky and Hutch.
And I was so excited to be in a Spence Diller-O-N-Wilson movie.
And I'd just come off the Daily Show.
And there was a really famous actor sitting in the makeup chair next to me.
And I said, oh, you.
yeah, I just came off the Daily Show.
And he goes, yeah, I used to like
the Daily Show. I think their humor is
really mean. And I was like,
what? Huh? He goes, yeah,
it's really, really self-righteous and mean.
And I was so proud
to have been on the Daily Show, and
he goes, yeah, I didn't like it.
I don't like it now that John Stewart's
the host. And John had only been the host
for, I'm not kidding, maybe
like a year. It's so rare
to meet the, like, Craig Kilbourne diehards
from that early, you know? It's like, it's
This was a Craig Kilbourne diehard.
I was a correspondent on the Craig Kilbourne pre-John's...
You were, that's great.
But it was, it was, they were still figuring out the format,
and I was doing, like, funny, fake segments from Maplewood, New Jersey,
the Maplewood Minute as if it was like Hollywood.
Because I was such a...
I watched all...
I watched the whole thing.
When I was in high school, I watched the Crowell-Kill-Born Daily show,
and it would re-air during the day, the next day,
I believe, on Comedy Central, and I would watch it,
and then I remember...
I was actually, I was upset when it was going to be switching
to John Stewart. I had no ill thoughts about John Stewart. I just really like Craig Kilbourne.
And then I remember the first episode of the John Stewart show where they retired the fire five
questions at the end, four, three, two, one. Because that left and went with Craig Kilbourne to the
other, when he went to CBS, I believe. Yeah. That was a really low, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, but I, I loved
my time on the Daily Show. It was so fun because it was, it was obviously John. And my audition for that,
I don't want to, like, hijack everything.
But my audition for that was, it was, you know, the Daily Show is heavily scripted.
You know, and when you do your correspondence piece.
But I didn't know that when I auditioned because I was coming from an improv background,
so I thought, oh, I've got to make this mine.
And so I rewrote everything, like, in my voice.
And at the end of it, John, I finished my audition, and I can hear John Stewart going,
well, she's fired.
And I was like, thanks, too, thanks so much, bye-bye.
And they called and they said I had the job.
So it turned out you did do the right thing.
I did do the right thing.
Nobody's going to, nobody can out Rachel Harris, Rachel Harris.
We'll be right back.
Hey, don't go anywhere.
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And we're back.
It's time to take out a lover leave a classic.
That's right.
It's time for the rant wheel.
Here's how it works.
We're going to spin the wheel.
It'll land on one of our four faces.
and that person has one minute on the clock
to rant against that person plays your thing
of their choosing. Are you ready?
Oh, boy. I don't know.
I can give you
one of my options if you want. People who are different than you.
Okay.
Here we just jump right in, Joe.
Listen, I think
AMC theaters promos
with Nicole Kinbe. Yeah.
Okay? We've seen them
a lot, all right? I know why I go to the movies.
It's for the magic, sure.
Yes, it's to laugh
to cry. Sure, I know the indescribable feeling when the lights him, but we're done with it.
Now it's like a Rocky Horror Picture Show. And again, let me just add, I love Nicole Kidman. This has
nothing to do with Nicole. Great actress. And has nothing to do with AMC theaters that are supporting
our movie. She's in every single movie. It's just a matter of like, let's rotate people. Let's
this isn't a pop hit. Let's move it along. We get it. I mean, that's so important. And I'm glad
you took a moment inside of that. I still got to go. All right, well, look.
Listen, also, they open with it in the rain, you know?
Like, as if we only go to the movies when it's raining.
Come on, guys, we go to the movies because we love the movies.
It doesn't matter about the weather.
Get in there and go see a perfect story, because you can.
Yeah.
Pretty good.
Beautifully said, I appreciated how midway through you took a moment
to make sure you complimented Nicole Kidman so that she would turn the key
and close the box with the red button on it.
So you're safe again.
That was beautiful, and I agree.
I liked it.
They did shorten it.
There's a cut down version now.
They keep, they do different.
It's, as it is, I agree that it's, it's as if they've only could shoot one promo for 10 years.
Right.
They have to keep cutting it up in different ways.
And it's like, they could do it.
What is it?
It's a big payday.
They want to kind of spread it out, maybe.
Well, they know it was, it was like a meme and a zeitgeist.
Yeah.
And that's a lightning and a bottle thing.
You know, you're not going to, you know, the next one is like, I don't know who it's going to be walking down the stairs,
but it's like a kind of nobody wants that.
That's a tough job.
You know, like that...
Let's do another viral.
I'll do it.
I'll do it.
I wonder how my wife and I'll do it.
They said they're looking for a Ricky Jervais type.
I wonder how much they offered her to do another one.
Yeah.
And what was it?
Somehow heartbreak seems what in here?
Seems less harmful or what is it?
Heartbreak seems...
Heartbreak seems...
Heartbreak feels good in a place like this.
Heartbreak feels good in a place like this.
Is that what it is?
But also, I wonder if she was asking her reps like,
did I give them permission to use that forever?
I thought that was like during the pandemic for like a few weeks they would run that.
And also, heartbreak never feels good anywhere.
It does in a place like this.
Thank you.
You're right.
You're right.
It's heartbreak.
It hurts.
It's called heartbreaking for a reason, right?
Let's spin it again.
Rachel, what's something you'd like to rant about?
Okay, I would like to, and kind of keeping on theme, I guess, because he just talked about theaters.
I would like to rant about the fact that, um, um, um, um, um,
film, we all like to go to see films, right?
But what I think we're tired of is seeing the exact same actors in every single big film, right?
And I think, I didn't realize that I was going to get an applause break.
But for me, and the example I use all the time, is that the hangover, this film that I did with, at the time, people didn't really know.
the biggest actor in the film, I think, was Jeffrey.
Boy, I love that.
Jeffrey Epstein.
No, Tamboer, Jeffrey Tambor.
He was one of the biggest actors in it.
And it was a little-known Ed Helms, a little known Zach Galefanacus, and Bradley Cooper.
And I think that's what made that film so great, was that nobody really knew those guys.
They took a risk on them.
We liked going on the journey with them because we hadn't seen them so much before.
And my time's up.
I think it's, well, I feel that way often when they all announce some, like, new animated movie, and you'll see the cast, you'll be like, what, why do you need super hot people for this?
Is it, if things not easy enough for the hottest human beings and the history of humankind?
And the richest.
The richest, hottest people in our community.
They're also getting the voice actor work.
Like, why?
Like, is there any, it's all, by the way, it's like evidence.
It's like, it's so they can do the promotion cycle.
for the thing. But it's like, what about
the voice actors that have those great voice
actor voices? You know?
Like, I don't need Jason Momoa to be
flounder in the little maremaid. You know what I mean?
It doesn't do anything for me.
Jason Mamoa is flounder.
Why? Come on.
Let's spin it again.
Oh, it's got a 50-50
is going to be me.
Oh, my goodness.
My thing is
when people, I don't think people
should come up to you at a social
event and say, do you know who I am? Do you remember me? It bothers me so much because what are you
going to get out of it? Because if I don't know who you are, then it's just awkward for both of us. We both
feel bad. So what's the point? And I personally feel like people should just wear name tags always.
That should be mandated with your name and bullet points about who you are. But at least,
it's short of that, at least you go up to somebody anywhere. Unless it's your spouse, you should just be like,
Hey, oh, David Wayne, I'm a filmmaker.
We met at Joe's house, and we were talking about bagels,
and we had a fun time.
It was like a year ago.
And then before I even had a chance to speak, now,
and when I say, do you remember me?
Of course I do.
And whether it's true or not, we're everybody's happy.
That's right.
Well, I find that, like, there's the, like,
sometimes you'll say, like, you'll introduce yourself,
and they'll say, we've met.
And it's like, okay, fine, but, like, I'm just,
I, fuck you.
Maybe I recognize.
Like, maybe I thought we met.
Maybe I'm not sure if you remembered me.
Yeah.
Right?
Like, it's not insulting to introduce someone to someone that you've already met.
Also, like, all of our brains are fried.
Everyone is distracted, and a lot of people are bad of names and faces like myself.
It's like, give me a break.
We're all hurtling through, on a rock, through space.
Give us a break.
Just for mine.
We've made out, we're doing pretty well.
Lindsay, Lindsay Graham is dead.
Nothing is promised.
Let's spin it again.
I wonder who it would be.
I wonder who.
I hope it's me again.
It has landed on me, and interestingly enough, my new headshot.
All right.
Okay.
My rant is about swastika's in the wild.
Sure.
So I went to an incredible restaurant.
One of the best restaurants in Los Angeles is called Bistro Naa.
It's in the San Gabriel Valley.
If you call a weekend ahead, you could get a Peking Duck.
And it's amazing food.
I've been before some of the best Chinese food you will ever get.
but we're sitting at the table and then we notice that there's this trim throughout the restaurant.
Can we zoom in?
Can you see that in the trim?
I didn't take a photo while I was there, so these are from Yelp.
There are these swastikas everywhere, everywhere on every wall in the restaurant, and it's just on the line.
I think it's on the wrong side of the line, but it's just on the line of like,
did you know what the fuck?
Come on.
Are we catching this?
You see what I mean?
Once you see it, that's all you're seeing.
That's all you're seeing.
And then all of a sudden, okay, you're a lot.
at a restaurant with your parents
on the last day of the visit, and now
the topic of anti-Semitism is on the
table, and it's going to be a tough fucking dinner.
Because then it's about
Bernie Sanders hating the Jews, and it's
like, what? All right, that's the rant
wheel. We'll go right back.
And we're back.
And now it's time
to close out the show with a segment we call
Second Thoughts. Here's how it works.
I thought this went great, but my producers
have handed me a list of things they wish I hadn't
said or done. First regret, too many Lindsay Graham
gay jokes are not enough. It's kind of our
last chance. I wouldn't even
think of that.
These were our last ones.
Well, people still make Reagan jokes.
Yeah, right.
I mean, not very successful people.
Right? Like, if it's like, six months
from now, I'm like, boy, Lindsay Graham, boy, he loved
guzzling come, huh? Like,
it's not going to play as well, I don't think.
It won't work as well. Yeah, I don't think it'll work as well.
Just that on its own killed.
Yeah?
I did the Taco Bell Chihuahua's accent, kind of.
We talked, no, we talked about it, and we felt, we felt legally I could get away with, I had to say Yochiero with the accent.
If I said Yochiero, Gatorade, and Saltines, that's not funny.
But if I had to say that, Yochiero, if I did that, then I could just say Gatorade and Saltines.
I felt like we were in the clear.
I think we were okay, sort of, you know, with the, with, with the internet, I think.
We'll see what happens.
I'm not loving the reaction.
Well, yeah, I would get canceled because I thought it was very funny.
Yeah, I could too.
Great.
I mean, like, and I think if you...
I'll take the side of what's very offended.
Okay, thank you for...
Thank you for holding me accountable.
I laughed harder than the audience at the joke about the Katari spy being heard in Trump's bathroom.
That worked for me, and that's okay.
I love how your producers are sitting there thinking of things that you did wrong.
So one thing that the producers believe that David and Joe did wrong is,
that you need to have a better ready answer for celebrity sex.
It's so funny.
We have been asked that 300 times.
I know.
And as I was,
as the words were leaving my mouth,
I'm like,
John,
shut the fuck up.
What are you doing?
It's a fair question.
Yes.
Yes.
But why am I,
why am I in here in the slot bucket?
Oh, yeah.
But I was like,
that's creepy too.
I was like,
who would have been,
but I have answered that several times during our press tour.
with the answer, Ed Koch.
That's good. See, that's good.
Ed Koch. And I could have just done that again.
I had a...
So I have regrets.
Let's see.
I tried to shoehorn my failed sitcom
into the wet, hot American summer conversation.
I was supportive of that.
I was supportive of that, too.
Any second thoughts you'd like to add?
I stand by my words.
Wow.
Brave.
Yeah.
Brave, given what you've said.
Given the thing you...
The one thing you said that you're not even remembering
that is fucking crazy.
You just sort of a blind spot and you said it.
I said blind spot, Abelist.
So now I'm done.
Well, I guess I'm going to have a little surprise
on the review.
And then, yeah.
So I think we're good.
I think we're good.
David, nothing?
I feel great about everything that's happened tonight.
And I think this has been a great audience, by the way.
Agreed.
Maybe it's not funny to say it,
but it happens to be how I feel.
I mean, people could get laughs for taking things down.
You suck and we suck.
No, I'm sorry, it's not how I feel.
Yeah.
Yeah, I feel joy right now.
Are you, can I ask you about this regret that you may not know about when we first walked in?
David said, ah, I overdressed.
No.
Do you feel like you've overdressed now?
Now I feel fine.
Yeah.
Try wearing a sweater.
You know what's one regret I feel a little bit, actually?
What?
I don't know if I enough really explained the incredible reviews that are most.
movie Gail Dautry and the Celebrity Sex Pass has gotten from
incredible reviews.
Not just critics, but like audiences of all different types are having this like
amazing experience going and laughing so hard, like more than they have in years they keep saying.
And I feel like I didn't underline that enough or explain that if you go to gaildotry.com.
You can get tickets for wherever it's nearby you to see it.
Yeah, they say that basically the second leading cause of diarrhea is people laughing too hard at this movie.
Yeah.
Right now.
And it would be in first, but for this unusual parasitic year.
It would have actually been diarrhea number one.
Okay.
And that's our show.
Thank you so much for Rachel Harris, David Wayne, and Joe Lachulio.
There are 111 days until the midterns.
We'll be back Friday with Des Bishop and Carmen Christopher.
Have a great night.
Love it or Leave It is a crooked media production.
Our show is produced by Kendra James, Bill McGrath, Kelsey Gante, and me, John Lovett.
Our production team includes Hallie Keeper, Sarah Lazarus, Roman Borsolino,
Peter Miller, David Tolls, Claudia Shang, Jay Banks, Gavis,
Kevin Purcell and Matt DeGroh. And our staff is proudly unionized with the Writers Guild of America East.
