Lovett or Leave It - We Impeached Him.

Episode Date: December 21, 2019

Mayor Pete Buttigieg joins Jon in studio to play Queen for a Day. Should college plans be universal? Chris Pratt or Chris Pine? Big questions. Plus Josh Gondelman and Negin Farsad join live as Trump gets impeached, the Democrats get feisty at the debate, and Kumail Nanjiani gets jacked. See you in 2020, 

Good evening, Los Angeles. The last show of 2019. Can't believe it. Love It or Leave It is coming to Iowa City right before the caucus. Tickets are on sale right now. Crooked.com slash events. They're going fast.

Not as fast as they were when I said that the last time. Slowed a bit. But they're still moving, sir. Your skepticism is not appreciated. And an update fair fight Stacey Abrams organization to put 20 teams on the ground and 20 battleground states is a cause at crooked that we decided to try to raise two million dollars to support we hit two million dollars thank you to everybody that went to Vote Save America

and donated to this cause it already made a difference in Kentucky it will make a difference in next year's election as we make sure that every person who wants to cast a ballot can have that ballot casted counted

they can have their ballot they'll, and then it'll be counted. That's the key thing. Anybody who wants to vote gets to vote. Stacey's going to make sure of it. And on that note, as we head into 2020, as we take a moment to pause and be with friends and family for the exact right amount of time before we lose our minds. If you go to crooked.com slash impact, we put together an impact report about all the work that you've done over the past three years. Because next year, I know we're all going to be asked to do more and donate and knock on doors and make calls and I know you've already done so much work and so we just wanted to put together a document to show you just how much of a difference you've already made and it has been an incredible privilege to get to have this platform and use it to kind of point

people into ways that they can help because that wouldn't matter if people didn't respond and you have responded. So please go check that out at crooked.com. Thank you from all of us. All right, let's get into it. What a week. All right. What a year. I know that it was a long and grueling slog.

I know sometimes you almost had to throw your phone away. It was so frustrating. And there was a long time where it felt like this would never happen, that this day would never come. Cats is finally released in theaters. Here are some real quotes from actual reviews. I would rather eat glass than watch Cats again. Is the whole cast being held hostage?

It is literally the stuff of nightmares. Brace yourself. Cats is the worst thing to happen to cats since dogs. By the time I left the theater, I wasn't even sure what a real cat looked like anymore. Oh God, my eyes. I have so many more. Just fucking sit down, take a sip of something.

This adaptation gets straight to the heart of the material, which is basically two hours of stray cats introducing themselves. First of all, full disclosure, I am not a cat person. Secondly, after watching this mortifying film, I'm not sure I'm a movie person anymore either. And of course, Carrie Langell of the Arizona Republic said, and I quote,

I didn't hate it. And I'd just like to remind everybody that Arizona is a swing state. Anyway, what else happened this week? Oh, this can't be right. It says here we impeach the president of the United States. Shame on all of you. How dare you applaud this solemn news.

You stop that. Button it up. Button it up. Kevin McCarthy is watching. Kevin McCarthy is watching. How dare you have any sense of pride and relief knowing that we used the power we had to uphold the basic tenets of our democracy and refuse to allow Donald Trump to abuse his office and violate our laws with impunity.

Shame on all of you. I'm just kidding. We got him. I did love Nancy Pelosi's scolding her members in this moment when it passed. Can we roll the clip? The yeas are 230.

The nays are 197. Present is one. Article one is adopted. Her hand comes up, and it just goes one inch across. And that silenced 50 politicians. Hand came up, just... I appreciated it.

And I liked it because it wasn't just the way a mother would scold an unruly child, which it was. It was a very specific kind of scold, because it wasn't the kind of scold that happens in the car. It't the kind of scold that happens in the car.

It's the kind of scold that happens in front of company. It was more of a look. Not here. Do not embarrass me. Here. On Wednesday, the House of Representatives, led by Nancy Pelosi, Jerry Nadler, and Adam Schiff, officially adopted two articles of impeachment, one for abuse of power and another for obstruction of all of my fucking brain space for the last four years. Donald Trump becomes just the third president to be impeached,

walking in the footsteps of soft spot for the Confederacy Andrew Johnson and hard on for everything Bill Clinton. The vote was carried out largely along party lines with former Republican Justin Amash voting in favor of impeachment and four Democrats opting to be little shits. I'm going to vote for one but not the other. That'll do it. Fuck you. What are you doing? Get your heads out of your asses.

Tulsi voting present. Speaking of, one of those Democrats is presidential candidate and Hawaii's most active word volcano, Tulsi Gabbard. Tulsi opted to vote president because she said that while she believes the president did commit wrongdoing,

she did not think the crimes rose to the level of, quote, ruining my shot to run as a third-party candidate. After the impeachment vote, Nancy Pelosi hinted that she may delay sending the articles to the Senate until Mitch McConnell agrees to hold a fair trial. In an interview with Politico, she basically said her hands were tied

because how could she appoint floor managers for an impeachment trial if she doesn't yet know the rules of the trial, and she just hopes that there can be a bipartisan agreement in the Senate. She then winked so hard Mitch McConnell felt a breeze. And that breeze briefly reminded Mitch McConnell of what it was like to be a child.

And then he had this moment where he had total clarity, like the world went quiet and it was just him and a stick and a ball in a field in Augusta, Georgia where he grew up. And then he realized he was standing in front of himself as a child. And he kneeled down in front of this little, quiet, sharp boy

and said how sorry he was, how sorry he was for all of it. Nah, it didn't happen. He told that little boy to buy tobacco stock, short-sell Enron, go long on fracking, and quit crying like a fairy. I'm not a stranger, I'm you. At the exact moment that the House approved the first article of impeachment, Trump was 600 miles away at a rally in Battle Creek, Michigan, where he would mock pro-impeachment Representative Debbie Dingell

for thanking him after providing her late husband, the longest-serving member in the history of Congress with a state funeral, even going so far as to suggest that her husband was in hell. This is, for so many reasons, insane. John Dingell is not in hell. We are in hell. And he is free. Anyway, Donald Trump is now the third president to be impeached

and the 15th president to deserve it. In all seriousness, the only reason we are in position to impeach Donald Trump is because we were able to win the House. And Trump is because we were able to win the House. And the only reason we were able to win the House is because millions of people voted, donated, knocked on doors, and did their part because they believed, despite all the protestations of the Fox News industrial complex, despite all the headwinds against us, besides all the forces in our politics that tell us to be cynical, that our votes don't matter,

that electing Democrats won't make any difference. This was a moment where, because people did their jobs and made sure we elected leaders who would hold Donald Trump accountable, that gavel wasn't in Kevin McCarthy's hands, who has sold out his country. It was in Nancy Pelosi's hands.

The gavel in that intelligence committee wasn't in Devin Nunes' hands, someone who is now affiliated with this criminal enterprise. It was, in fact, in Adam Schiff's hands, whose district we are in tonight. And nobody knows what's going to happen now when this goes to the Senate, what a trial will look like,

whether there'll be witnesses, what that final vote will look like. But I hope the lesson we take away from what got us here is that all the work that has gone into resisting Donald Trump, fighting Donald Trump, electing better leaders has made a difference. We have put in the House a group of people who don't let Donald Trump set the standard for what a president should be, that lets us set the standard for what we believe a president should be. And I think that's inspiring. I think that's hopeful. And the fact that we only lost a few votes in the House is also hopeful. And I think one thing we should all think about is donating to some of those vulnerable Democrats in districts that lean towards Trump, who did decide to put their country over, in some

cases, their own personal political interests, which was a brave and difficult vote for a lot of those members. And the fact that Nancy Pelosi was able to keep the caucus together is incredibly impressive. And I just feel very grateful to them. Whatever disagreements we may have with the process going forward, I think that that's important. And one other thing I just wanted to say about this, which is Republicans in the last few days have really tried to adopt our rhetoric. I think they've felt the sting of Democrats going on television and saying,

we believe in the Constitution, the real of law, and upholding our democracy. And the Republican response is, it wasn't that bad a call, which was pretty weak. So now they're all going on television and talking about history and what history will judge them for and how wrong this was. And, you know, right wing pundits reading

Donald Trump's dumb six page letter aloud as some testament to the authority vested in the article two of the Constitution and what have you. And like people like Kevin McCarthy have convinced themselves that because Donald Trump is worth the pain for them personally, that it's worth the pain for all of us. And it's just not true. And it's unjustifiable. It's indefensible. And one of the most exhausting things about politics in this era is having to debate ridiculous, indefensible positions being defended again and again and again. And I know it's grueling and I know it's tiring. But the good news is right now, Donald Trump's polling on impeachment looks a lot like what Richard Nixon's polling on impeachment looked like when he resigned from

office because he was too irreparably harmed. And unfortunately for us, Richard Nixon had an advantage, which is he didn't have Fox News protecting him every day. But I guess I just, as we head into this period where we're going to kind of step back and hopefully not pay attention so hard over the next two weeks, just keep in mind that this idea that nothing matters, nothing makes a difference, that's what they want us to think. It's just not true. It's just not true. Donald Trump is going into 2020, despite the strength of this economy and one of the weakest positions a president in an economy like this could possibly be. And that is because the hard work of a lot of activists and organizers and everybody who's done their part. So that's all I wanted to say about that. Let's welcome our panel. She's the host of Fake the Nation

and author of How to Make White People Laugh. Please welcome back Nagin Farsad. How are you? I'm good. Thanks for having me. I'm like five minutes away from being completely checked out of this political moment. Well, let's get some stuff under the wire. Yeah, for real. I got nothing. Are you going to introduce our fellow panelists? Don't tell me what to do.

I want to have a moment with you. Is that not allowed? What are you afraid of? What are you afraid you're going to say? This is a really beautiful moment. I'm glad we're having it. He's a writer and producer for Desus and Mero on Showtime and his book Nice Try is out now.

Please welcome Josh Gondelman. Hi, Josh. How are you doing? Great. I didn't want to interrupt the real tender thing you guys had going before I got up here, but thank you for having me. It was so tender.

It was really beautiful. It was so beautiful. It was like an Amy Klobuchar, Mayor Pete level. In a wine cave. We'll get to it. We'll get to it. We'll get there. Sorry, I didn't mean to jump the gun.

You didn't? Great Stop running his show, Josh Guys, I feel like I've come up here and blown it already And I apologize I think you should leave Alright Stay here, you sit back down

I'm easily bullied I used to be I used to be I used to be easily I used to be. I used to be easily bullied. And then I realized I could be a bully. That was my lesson. Any thoughts on impeachment?

You happy about it? Sad about it? I'm in favor of it, personally. You're in favor? You know, it was weird, because when they were doing the voting, they were, like, kind of co-mingling and meandering in and out of frame. And if you squinted your eyes, it just sort of looked like

they were at a Christmas market. You know what I mean? There's also a noise that I've never made, but there's a noise that members of Congress make that feels very old-fashioned, like from another era, from like the House of Commons or the Civil War,

which is just, there's a kind of, whoo, that you hear like they, when they, a deep, a deep, you know that sound that you just don't hear

in the world? Like no one cheers like that or boos like that at sporting events. Right. There's a kind of It's like the sound you'd make if like

a horse ran away. Can you guys, can you guys just do it with me so that we have multiple people? It's like It's their way of expressing. It was, because it happened specifically.

It's also very Bernie Sanders, that sound. That's just, that's the sound he makes when his heart comes back online. I'm back. Bernie's back, baby. Bernie's back, baby.

Bernie's back, baby. And I got three quarts of new young blood let's do this on impeachment i feel like the house voting was the the fun part right and now it goes to a republican senate where we need a giant majority and it feels like when like whenever i get a burger and salad i eat the salad first because i know that if I eat the burger first, I won't get to the salad. And I feel like America just ate the burger first. Oh my god, we

ate the burger first. That's a huge problem. And I so appreciate that analogy. I know exactly what you mean. I will add to it and say only when you get a salad and you just realize oh no, I ate all the chicken and the little

crispy onions. And now all that's left is only the barely dressed lettuce that hid beneath all the delicious parts. And you're like, is it even okay to eat romaine now? Or are we in one of those anti-romaine periods that crop up more and more frequently?

The other thing that I thought was fun about this week, though, was that what really brought Republicans and Democrats together is that in every one of their little speeches, it felt like they were all auditioning for community theater. You know? It was just like these impassioned, whatever, like some pro, some against, but all that same level of like,

I can bring it to this year's production of Once Upon a Mattress. And it was like really cute that way. That is such a good point. There's something about, there's such a funny thing that happens in these moments, which is they get kind of meta and they go down to the house floor and they say, I stand before you at a moment of history,

which is, if true, not needed to be said. You know what I mean? Right. Like, it's like protesting too much. Like, little Sarah Beth, little Anna Jane, your daddy's doing something for the history books right now.

Like, shut up. They're just trying, like, if someone writes a Hamilton 300 years from now, they're like, quote me directly, please. I'm very poetic. When we come back, okay, stop.

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Visit nativedeodorant.com and use the promo code LOVEIT during checkout. I would go for a Frasier fur. Someday people are just going to cut out takes of our ads and you're just going to hear, I'm a Christmas tree ready to fuck. Yeah. Well, probably won't.

Play it on loop. Hopefully it won't stop me from being mayor, you know, of South Bend, Indiana. Where I'm a Christmas tree ready to fuck. Yeah. Well, probably won't play it on loop. Hopefully it won't stop me from being mayor, you know, of South Bend, Indiana. Where I'm going next. It's on the path now. And we're back. For those listening at home, in the break just now,

I almost told everybody in the audience that for dinner last night, I had a 10-piece McNugget meal and a cheeseburger with extra pickles and a McChicken. That is fucking bonkers. Pickles are like a salad, though. They are.

It is a vegetable. And then... You're just sweating right now. It just looks like you're sweating still from that meal. That's the meat coming through my pores. And just to paint a final bit of the picture for all of you, now McDonald's did discontinue my favorite item, which is the spicy McChicken.

Now they only have the Cossack McChicken. So when I get home, I take out some Cholula hot sauce and I add it to recreate what was my favorite item. And Taco Bell also discontinued the Double Decker Taco Supreme, my other favorite fast food item. And I'm trying to understand how these places don't respect the fact that I am their best customer. They don't want their best customer to die. Now it's time for a game called OK Stop. We'll roll a clip and the panel can say OK Stop at any point to comment.

While Nancy Pelosi was gaveling in impeachment, Trump held the longest rally of his presidency in Michigan, a state he is hoping to trick into voting for him twice. Let's see how the news is sitting with Wharton's graduate voted most likely to end up in jail for insider trading and least likely to be president but most likely to be impeached if he becomes president, but he won't because America isn't insane. Let's roll the clip.

Remember when I first started this beautiful trip, this beautiful journey, I just said to the first lady, you're so lucky I took you on this fantastic journey. Okay, stop. Ew, ew, ew, ew. Ew, ew, ew, ew. Ew, ew. Ew. Ew. That's...

Oh, God. No, you please. No, you go. I was just going to say that does sound like what he said every time after he's had sex, right? You're welcome. I took you on a fantastic journey.

Now if you're here when I wake up, my dogs will eat you. Just kidding. I don't have dogs. I'll have my sons eat you. They'll eat a person. They're like hogs. They'll eat a person like a hog does. That's not sexual.

They'll chew through the bone. No, that's not sexual. This is not a sexual situation. This is a Hannibal situation. Yeah, this is a Hannibal situation. We have a Hannibal situation on our hands. Eric and Don have not eaten for five days. I keep them hungry for the one night stands.

You could be mom number three, or you could be lunch number one. Weird applause break. I like you freaks. It's so much fun. They want to impeach you. They want to do worse than that. By the way, by the way,

by the way, by the way, it doesn't really feel like we're being impeached. Okay, stop. He's just disassociating. That's what that is. He's like, it doesn't feel like I'm being impeached and it feels like I'm floating over a farm. Wait, can I just recall, can we all just recall for a moment

how in the beginning of his presidency there was this whole like, he's going to pivot to being presidential any minute now. What if you guys like this impeachment actually starts the pivot to being presidential? You know, like maybe this is no. OK, I would I would look, I just would say, let's let's ask that question again at the end of the clip. It's funny, too, because it is like Donald Trump is going to pivot to being presidential. It's like saying, this goat is going to pivot to being a hawk. I don't think it is.

I don't think it's going to shed its goat-like qualities and fly through the air like a hawk. And when you watch some of these people get up and speak today, they don't even listen. Oh, you have violated the Constitution. Well, what has he done wrong? Well, we don't know that. Okay, stop. That's not a fair paraphrase, sir.

Also, when he says some of these people, he doesn't know anyone's name in Congress. I really like the, like, Oh, these Democrats, These Democrats They violated the constitution Like yeah that's the problem You hit the nail You can say it in a funny voice But the transcript of this

Is just saying what we're saying You violated the constitution So we're impeaching you If you say it in a funny voice It doesn't count Oh double homicides He killed two people in cold blood. You just make it sound...

That's his whole thing. He makes bad things sound good by saying them like they're good, and he makes good things sound bad by saying them like they're dumb. Fuck! That is what he's done. That's his whole thing. That was all you needed. That was the fucking code to unlock America's political system. Sinks, right?

Showers. And what goes with a sink and a shower? Ten times, right? Ten times. Bob, not me, of course, not me. But you. Okay, stop. What?

Ten times flushing? He's talking about toilets. So he's never flushed his own toilet. I mean, right? That's the only takeaway we could possibly have. Eric, come in here. It is ten. Also, he has to self-aggrandize so much that he's like

people flush the toilet 10 times not me i should have tic-tac every time i oh yeah i love there's such a defensiveness again he is bringing up toilets because uh he must have had a meeting like two weeks ago where the topic of like low flow environmental policy came up, and his little, tiny, smooth brain took in all this information. And you know how black holes take in a whole planet and then just shoot out just a ray of nonsense? That's what he's saying his butthole does, too. His brain is a black hole,

and his mouth is a pulsar or a quasar. Does anyone remember where it all comes out? They think the black hole stuff may come out the other side without retaining any of the information? Is it pulsar? Gamma ray burst? Fuck you. Also, leave it to Donald Trump to speak ill of the courtesy flush, one of America's greatest inventions.

And obviously this isn't important. What I'm about to say is not important. He is a 73-year-old man with the diet of a 22-year-old track star. Let's keep rolling the clip. Debbie Dingle, that's a real beauty. So she calls me up, like eight months ago. Her husband was here a long time. She calls me up.

It's the nicest thing that's ever happened. Thank you so much. John would be so thrilled. He's looking down. He'd be so thrilled. Thank you so much, sir. I said, that's okay. Don't worry about it. Maybe he's looking up. I don't know. Okay, stop. There's a serious point about this, which is how, like, it's actually, it's interesting because he's angry that Debbie Dingell voted for impeachment when actually, even in this moment, you actually see the seeds

of why Donald Trump's conduct requires impeachment because what he's saying is, I can't believe Debbie Dingell voted to uphold her obligations and impeach me on these serious substantive grounds when I did something nice for her. I personally, not the nation, right? For him, it's not the nation. I personally did her a solid, which was allowing John Dingell to have a state funeral, right? That's something that the

president, I guess, orders. And he doesn't view that as an act of the administration or the act of the nation. He views that as a personal thing that he did because he does not, his broken narcissistic brain can't see the difference between the office and himself. And so he's saying it's disloyal of Debbie Dingell to, after the administration provides this honor to her late husband, for her to turn around and do something that is antagonistic to Donald Trump the man, because Donald Trump doesn't see a difference between Donald Trump the man and Donald Trump the office, because Donald Trump is a improv fascist who is yes-anding America into authoritarianism. You know, Debbie Dingle tweeted something very sad. She said, you know, this really hurt. It hurts more than you know.

This is my first holiday without my husband. I'm very sad. And this, like, really seems like really broke her heart. And, you know, Donald Trump has lost people, but it seems to have had no impact on him. I know we're used to it, but I don't want to get used to the fact that the president is a soulless monster. Just sort of like, I'm going to say someone who's grieving that the president is a soulless monster just sort of like that like like i'm gonna

say someone who's grieving that her husband is in hell because her vote was bad for me it is a despicable act and just a little reminder of just how much anyway we know the entire impeachment doesn't matter to him i mean i was wondering like what's worse for him, an impeachment or like the ratings of The Apprentice had declined? You know, he probably felt just as bad. Same level bad when Apprentice ratings were down. And yeah, it's funny too. He's like, it's funny. I don't even feel impeached.

How the fuck do you know? You're the third person to be impeached. How do you know what it feels like to be impeached? No one knows. There's one living man that knows what it feels like to be impeached. His name is Bill Clinton. That's it. You call him and ask him how he felt.

Nixon's dead. We didn't get Bush. Ask Andrew Johnson who might be in hell. Here's what we do. We have Debbie Ding who might be in hell. Here's what we do. We have Debbie Dingle tell John in hell to go find Andrew Johnson, who's in hell as well, to ask him what it felt like. Or someone can call Bill Clinton, but both seem arduous. Maybe when he said, I don't feel impeached, he was like, I don't feel impeached because obviously I don't feel like a person does. Which explains everything else I'm about to say. Yeah. I don't feel impeached because obviously I don't feel like a person does. Which explains everything else I'm about to say.

Yeah, I don't feel impeached or empathy. When we come back, we'll have my interview with Mayor Pete Buttigieg, who graciously agreed to face the queen for a day gauntlet. Don't go anywhere. This is Love It or Leave It and there's more on the way. He's the mayor of South Bend, Indiana,

and the gayest presidential candidate who isn't Rudy Giuliani in drag. Please welcome Mayor Pete Buttigieg. Thanks for having me. Thanks for being here. Sure thing. How you doing? Great. It's good to have you back in the Crooked studio.

All right, I want to start. I want to talk to you about ambition. Here's why. You have this very kind of Midwestern. I'm not going to look at you while I say this. Aw shucks. Reserved, thoughtful. Some could say dorky. Some could say. Demeanor. There was this moment in one of the earlier presidential debates and it was with Eric Swalwell who's being critical of your record as mayor and in one moment the camera was on Swalwell but you were in the background and you had this look in your eyes which I'd never seen from you it was a look of a killer it was it was but what it was for me is when I saw it, I said, there it is. Like there is an ambitious person.

That's who has to be under there beneath this sort of aw shucks demeanor because you're going to be somebody who is going to go for a Rhodes Scholarship. I am engaged to a Rhodes Scholar. Not a brag. I know what it takes to get that. You go to the military. You do these incredibly ambitious things. you run for mayor, now you're running for president. And you're very aware in how you do this that you're telling a story about

yourself. And I wonder if you find that one part of the story you can't really tell is how ambitious you are, that you're aware that that makes people a little bit uncomfortable. Do you think that's true? I mean, if you run for president at the age of 37, if you run for president, period, I think you're revealing yourself to be ambitious. There's something in American culture that I think is very healthy that we're also skeptical of ambition. We don't want people to have connived their way to wherever they are, right? And there have been a lot of twists and turns. It's not like I went home to Indiana to run for mayor, uh, run for treasurer actually, then ran for mayor thinking, you know, eight years of this here in the county city building in South Bend, and then it's right to the white house.

Right. I mean, uh, there's a lot of kind of path dependency too, but, um, but yeah, I mean, on some level, if you're running for any office, then, then you're, you're revealing some level of ambition that if nothing else, you think you have something to offer, that it's going to make a difference and that you'd be good at it. And you've had that for a long time. I mean, one of the pieces that came out recently that was actually looking at your relationship to the black community in South Bend in this campaign, there was somebody you worked with. And even in how you were recommended for that job somebody said to this journalist oh you got to meet this guy Pete he wants to be president

so in fairness I think more people were saying that about me maybe at that time in my life than than I had like fully internalized it part of why I wanted to go there was to see if maybe I wanted to be a journalist instead although what I figured I, the job was at a TV station doing investigative work and it was really powerful. Um, but in the end that experience kind of kept me on the path of wanting to be in public service. Yeah. But I'm not, I'm not harping on this because there's anything wrong with being ambitious or even, I think you are being pretty transparent about, I mean, you're, there's no way to be 37 and running for president without having some sense of like, I know I'm early. I know I'm coming at this fast. But, you know, you've talked a lot about the challenge of being gay and coming out of the closet. And, you know, one thing about

gay people, myself included, is, you know, there's a quality that a lot of gay people talk about, which is, especially when they're in the closet, that there's this need to kind of be perfect, to be the teacher's pet, to get the accolades, to get all the credit as if there's some ledger being kept. And on one side, there's being gay. And on the other side, there's all these other positive parts of your personality. And I had this thought when I saw that you were running for president, the way you've talked about this this that are my looking at an example of that writ large was There a part of you that ever thought yeah, I'm gay, but I gotta make sure I you know Talk about my Christian faith and yeah, I'm gay, but I'm gonna join the military so that yeah I may be gay, but I'm a gay fucking troop. I

Don't know I mean I think if if that kind of stuff goes on it happens so deep that you may not even be following it right I If that kind of stuff goes on, it happens so deep that you may not even be following it, right? I think it is true that you feel a different level of pressure to be the most, the best, the strongest, especially if there's something gnawing at you that makes you think that there's something about you that's wrong or off, right? And a part of it was different, which is more practical, which is just the simple fact that, you know, I had a little more maybe bandwidth because dating wasn't available for me for as long as I wasn't willing to be out. Right. So, you know, in hindsight, it's nuts that I was mayor and I was a reservist. I deployed to Afghanistan in the middle of being mayor.

Like, if I had any kind of personal life, I think none of that would be on the table. And yet you just you find places for your energy. Right. You can even argue, find places for your love to go if it's not going into a relationship. And who knows all the different ways that that that that kind of finds its way out. I'm conscious now of like literally being on the couch, uh, here and, uh, don't know that I'm that good at like plunging into my own, uh, kind of motivations or backstory that way. But there's no question that so many gay people feel that pressure and it, it, uh, I think propels us in different ways. So, you know, in one of, in, in, in the most recent debate, I believe, or maybe the one before last, there's been several, you know, you were asked about your performance with black voters. And you talked about how you

were very clear. And I think you got some unfair blowback for these comments. But you're very clear you weren't comparing the experience. You weren't saying that being gay was like being black or that the problems facing gay people or anything like the problems facing black people historically in the present, what have you, but that you had some access to what it's like to feel marginalized. And in the moment I watched that and I thought, I'll be honest, I thought, oh, I'm not sure this is going to play. And the reason I didn't think it was going to play is because you were talking about being an outsider. And, you know, I look at how successful you've been in this campaign. And then I look at how your challenge in this way to appeal to black voters and in some sense to young voters as well. And there's this sense that despite having said so, that you're not an outsider, that you don't

have this experience of being an outsider. And that even in that moment, when you talked about it, you talked about it in terms of laws, uh you saw people debating your rights as a human being do you feel as though you have been an outsider in your life that you truly have like i mean you're somebody where rhodes harvard mckinsey uh you're now the you came out of the closet most people don't get to come out of the closet as the mayor of their city. That's a pretty cool perch to be at. You're certainly at the center of things. Yeah, I would argue there are better places to be standing when you come out as gay than being an elected official in Indiana. Fair point.

Yeah, no, I understand what you're saying. And look, I'm not out to say that like I understand every experience of exclusion or marginalization uh right uh or anyone else's I mean part of what I was trying to get across and I have no idea whether it played well but it wasn't just the experience of exclusion but also the experience of having my rights expanded by coalitions of people who included people like me and people not like me and understanding how that kind of feeds back to an obligation I must have to make myself useful to others who, even if they're in the lead fighting for their own rights, like need people not like them at their side,

cheering them on or fighting with them. Um, I definitely felt a deep ambivalence about whether I fit in from the moment I look, you know, grown up in Northern Indiana. My last name is Buttigieg, right? I'm a pudgy, awkward, gay, though I don't really know it yet, kid. Like there were a lot of moments where I felt on the outside. And then there were a lot of other moments. The gayest thing you've ever said is calling yourself pudgy when I don't really believe you were that pudgy, which is very,

see now I'm starting to see it. What, pudge or? No, no, no, that was, that was, okay, because that felt gay to me in a way that I respected. I'm sorry to interrupt, joining for president, continue. No, I mean, we all, I mean, the point is, I think we all need to reach into whatever we do know of feeling like you don't fit. And a lot of times it's the things that make you fit in one context that wind up amounting to your style. I mean, definitely in the military, right? There's a lot of, a lot of it's about conformity, right? You're literally in a uniform, like there are certain things that you all have in common, but then everybody's kind of individual identity or kind of character comes out among those who know you.

Then you walk into an airport or a bar. If you're in uniform, like everybody looks at you, looks at you as just military, right? Where when you're among other people in uniform, all you feel about is all the different ways that you're at odds with those people in that same situation, if that makes sense. So I think growing up in my community, I felt both of it and not of it in a lot of ways, which is one of the reasons I left, right? That and the fact that the message that everybody got growing up in my part of Indiana was that success meant getting out. And then no sooner did I get out and find myself at a place like Harvard

where all of the things that made me weird back home, like being kind of intellectual and liberal, were accepted or even celebrated. And really smart. Yeah, but you were smarter than the other kids, right? I mean, not all of them. But you know what I mean. This is what I mean about the disambitious.

Like ambitious people, especially of our generation, there's this expectation of keeping your best qualities kind of a little bit in a cage. I mean, you were a really smart kid who got to go to Harvard from Indiana. That was something that told you that you were special and you were going to do really great things. And then you get to Harvard and you meet a lot of other people like that. Right.

Is that right? Yeah, that's right. And then you also realize that you're from somewhere, right? I never felt more Indiana than when I got to Harvard. Just like I never felt more American than when I got to Oxford. So like I never felt more American than when I got to Oxford. So the very same environment that you're at odds with when you're in it, you begin to own it when you step out of it for a second. And I think we all have that relationship with our communities,

with our country, often with our families. And I think there's a particular flavor of it for queer people because of all the different ways that that fact puts you at odds with your community, sometimes your family, and your your country one of the fights that's been going on right now is over whether or not certain programs should be universal and one thing you said early in the campaign was we shouldn't give in to republican arguments we should decide what we think is best and do what we think is best because they're going to call us socialists they're going to tar us no matter what and you know i think you've gotten some unfair criticism

on your higher ed proposal because it is incredibly ambitious. It would be, but for how far the party has moved, it's more progressive than anything proposed in any previous campaign. And yet, you know, you face criticism because it isn't universal, right? It is means tested. And even though you would cover what 80% of students, there are still people that wouldn't be helped. but you said we shouldn't be paying for college for the children of millionaires and billionaires now that to me is a political critique because we obviously have universal programs we have public education we don't think that it should be means tested for the children of of millions millionaires and billionaires is it simply politically untenable to have a universal public college program? Or do you actually believe it is worse policy to have a system that, say, taxes billionaires and billionaires a little bit more,

but is available to everybody? No, I think I believe what I do, not just politically, philosophically. I just think that this is an example of a benefit that we should target where it's going to make the biggest difference. Sure, yeah, a lot of our programs are universal. There's a very simple and very big difference between K-12 education and university education. And the simple difference is that we expect everybody to get through 12th grade, at least we hope everybody and want everybody to get through 12th grade. It's not the same with the university education. And look, there are some things that we means test and some things that we don't. I don't think anybody believes that the earned income tax credit shouldn't be means tested, right? I think that there's a limit on where

we should be paying for the, all the way down to the last penny of somebody, especially if by definition we're talking about those in the higher income brackets, but also by virtue of the fact that they do have a college degree will go on to be in a higher income bracket than those who didn't. So it's just a progressive, by my lights, it's a progressive idea that we should target those dollars because the reality is no matter where you're raising the tax money from, and I get that the idea of how we pay for this on my competitor's plan or on my plan for that matter, is largely taxes raised from rich people, right? But whether to spend them on rich people is a policy decision we make on every single policy that we initiate. And I believe that things like national defense or, you know, interstate highways should be equally available to everybody. But something

like university, I think it's fine if you're in that top 10%. I wish you well. I still wish you well. I just think you ought to pay your own tuition. But don't you think there are still families that, you know, in some of the higher, more expensive parts of the country that look at this and say, like, all right, so this isn't for me. The Democrats aren't for me. Or I don't, this is going to be a program that goes for certain people, not other people. Do you respect the argument that is made on the left now that basically Democrats made a mistake for a long time by doing these kinds of, that they bit off their nose to spite their face. That tax benefits that are kind of, that scale up as you make money, then scale down after a certain point, the complicated nature of it. It means that people just don't appreciate

that the policies help them. But here's the thing. That's a fundamentally political argument, right? That's saying, nevermind whether it's the right thing to do or the fair thing to do. If we make it universal, it'll be politically easier to defend and to advance, which is fine. It's valid. But it's ironic to me that the argument of what I would call generally the purists and the philosophical conclusion I've reached that maybe the top 10% should take care of themselves is being treated as if that's political. You know, I tweeted before you came here, does anyone have any questions for Mayor Pete? And I will tell you, a lot of people did not answer that question

sincerely. People have been remarking based on some polls that, you know what, this is the millennial candidate. But actually, the millennials, they are going elsewhere, right? They're going to Elizabeth Warren. They're going to Bernie Sanders. There was some polls headed at 12%, some polls as low as 2%. You know, you are offering this idea of generational change. And yet for a lot of people, they see Warren, they see Bernie as being the more dramatic form of change that they're looking for. Are they wrong about that? Well, I think it would be wrong to say that that's the only way to get real change. You know, I would be the most progressive president in a half century. Yeah, you can agree with my positions or not, but they're pretty progressive, right? the purity test or the extreme, especially at a moment where we have a chance to, and I'm not just talking about this politically, I'm saying in order to govern this really divided nation,

not that we're ever going to get most of the Trump hardcore, but that we hold together this amazing American majority that's ready to go on issue after issue after issue. My message to young people is I will be the most progressive president, certainly in your lifetime. I'm literally a millennial myself, barely, but I made the cut. No, we count. You're eight months older than me and we're fine. Yeah, 82. All right, we're good. And that we should think about not only how this fits ideologically, but where we head it as a country. And we've got to have a way of drawing more people into this vision that we're setting up. Because in addition to the policy fanaticism

of the GOP right now, we also have a core problem of the way that we have been turned against each other and have to be ready to heal that. And some of this isn't ideological. One of the things we actually noticed when I was running for mayor is that I, we're, you know, did not really, it was not like a left-right kind of election. Even then, when I was 29, the first time I was running, older voters were noticeably more likely to say that me being younger was a benefit. I don't know all the reasons for that, but we see that pattern again now. So I just want one more question about this, because these debates, whether it's about healthcare or some of the other questions, you know, they do seem disconnected from the reality of governing where, propose all the policies you want.

The next Democratic president will be begging Joe Manchin for votes, will be going to some of the more moderate members of the Senate. Is your proposition that whatever the policy proposals with the actual governing outcome of you versus Elizabeth Warren, does Elizabeth Warren's actual governing end up looking more progressive than your version of governing? Will she be further than left in outcomes if she were to be president? Well, no, because I think my governing strategy would be more likely to get the outcomes. Remember, however far we arrange ourselves on how far to go, 80% or 100%, this many trillion for health care versus that many trillion, it's multiplied by zero if it doesn't happen. And so at the end of the day, I think we share the goals, right? We share the goal of universal health care. for healthcare versus that many trillion. It's multiplied by zero if it doesn't happen. And so at the end of the day, I think we share the goals, right? We share the goal of universal healthcare. We share the desire to make sure college cost is never a barrier for somebody who wants to go to college. I mean, broadly, we're aligned as a party, actually, despite all the

narratives. We're largely aligned on where we think things ought to go. And the really good news is, it's not just internal alignment among Democrats. There's a healthy American majority that's with us, even in conservative states. And I don't mean this as a kind of, I'm not trying to be snide. That's a terrible way to introduce a question. Wow. No, but part of this debate that's been having inside the party is about whether or not to raise money from the financial sector, from the tech sector. And it seems as though, Mark Zuckerberg has called Elizabeth Warren an existential threat. If your proposition is forget how far left we go in the primary, the most important thing is who's going to get the most progressive policy done governing. Are some of the more centrist parts of the democratic establishment and the fundraising

and the donors, are they simply getting it wrong when they view you as a safer bet? In other words, is their idea of a Buttigieg administration as one that's more favorable to tech, let's say, which seems to be a conception largely held? Is that incorrect? Well, I'm not trying to trick anybody. If somebody is in business or they're wealthy and they're given to my campaign, I'd make it pretty clear to them that they're going to be more regulated and their taxes are going to go up. So I think that what's happening is that there are a lot of different things that motivate people to support a candidate. We're at, I think, 700,000 donors now.

I don't know what each of them thinks on anything, right? And chances are, as with every voter and every supporter, even your strongest supporters usually disagree with you on some stuff and agree with you on some stuff. If somebody thinks that I'm going to just keep everything the same in our economy, then yes, they're mistaken. But I think I've been pretty clear about the changes I'm going to make and why we need them, whether it's the need to regulate big tech

or the need to make sure that we actually return the sharing of the burden of the cost of government to a much fairer share that includes more for wealthy individuals and more for corporations. I'm pretty clear on what I'm going to do. And people, for whatever combinations of reasons, who believe I should be president, need to know when they're supporting me that they're supporting that. All right. Mayor Pete, you've agreed to play queen for a day. For decades, Grover Norquist, an alum at Mayor Pete's College, has asked Republican candidates for office to sign his pledge committing them to his core values. No new taxes, no elimination of tax deductions, no looking your partner in the eye during sex. And since I consider myself the Grover Norquist

of people who don't really like Harry Styles, but really likes Harry Styles, I figured I'd start my own pledge during this primary. I'm pinning presidential candidates down on the issues that matter to me most in a segment we call Queen for a Day. Mayor Buttigieg has graciously agreed to be the eighth candidate and first queen to face the gauntlet. Are you ready? Ready as I'll ever be. Today, states have the option to choose permanent standard time or to participate in daylight saving time. As president, will you pledge to sign into law a revision to the Uniform Time Act of 1966 to give states a third option to remain on daylight saving time permanently?

1966 to give states a third option to remain on daylight saving time permanently. I'll tell you this. When I was growing up in Indiana, in my part of Indiana, we didn't have daylight savings time. That's right. Indiana. Things were going along just fine. It was a little weird with the TV times. They switched in the summer. We were central.

In the winter, we were eastern. But that's because everybody else kept changing. They could have just been like us and everything would have been fine. That being said, we went through that change and I'm not sure we want to go through that again. So my answer is going to have to be no. Literally the first no. Amy Klobuchar said I could come to the White House to get it done. So just think about that in terms of just sort of pandering and the value of that. But no, so hold on. I'm here to take the tough positions. Let's dig in for a second. One second on this. So Indiana is on the eastern edge of the central time zone. Well, I live on the western edge of the eastern time zone, but it depends what county

you're... See, this is the Pandora's box that was unleashed. People like you came along, things were going on just fine. People like me? Yes. Gay Jews? Yes. Gay Jews demanding that we get on daylight savings time. So wait, Indiana is still split? Yeah. I Jews demanding that we get on Daylight Savings Time. So wait, Indiana is still split? Yeah. I mean, you go like 20 minutes from my house. And at one point, there was a rebellion where certain counties during the transition didn't. I was an intern for Joe Donnelly. And I remember he was running for Congress.

I was responsible for some kind of getting balloons to a parade or something. Looked up online to make sure that we were on like the Postal website, to make sure that we were half an hour early, got to Cass County. We were clearly half an hour late. Went into the nearest government building I could find, which is a library, and just asked, what time is it? And the lady pointed at two clocks on the wall, one of which said Eastern time, and the other said Commerce time, because that's what they called it. If you rejected the official it was chaos john it was total chaos all right we'll come back to it uh you're on air force one you notice a staffer is wearing a medical mask do you assume that they are sick or that they are preventing themselves from being

sick and keep in mind you can ask because you don't remember their name but you definitely should know their name i'm gonna assume they're preventing themselves from being sick okay okay if elected will you require Americans to do the Mayor Pete dance at sporting events instead of standing for the national anthem? I respect the national anthem, but it will be expected immediately after. Wow.

Wow. The American people need to know where you stand. What is more important to you, saving the turtles by banning straws or being able to finish a smoothie without the paper straw falling apart? I believe that the greatest nation on earth can invent a better straw. Third way. Demagogues and far-right nationalists are rising to power all over the world as the U.S. is losing

its grip on economic and military hegemony. Smooth peanut butter or crunchy? Crunchy. Correct. It has been reported that your comfort food is beef jerky. Are you prepared to revise your answer, or are you conceding that you are in fact a sentient gay politibot that converts animal protein into stump speeches? I suppose in a strict sense that is true. Fair enough. But I can do it with vegetable proteins too. You could.

Oh, that's impressive, like a pea protein. Wait, is beef jerky genuinely your comfort food? Yeah, although lately I've kind of been branching out. But yeah, I'm going to stick with beef jerky. Are you keto? What's happening? Are you eating carbs? Are we eating carbs right now?

I still don't totally understand what that means. You don't know what keto means? Something where you put butter in your coffee. We don't do things like that in Indiana. I knew that was coming. I knew it was going to be a bar against the- I'll tell you what this is. I've really come to embrace the Impossible Whopper.

Impossible Whopper. And that's become kind of a go-to. Okay, okay. But you're eating buns. We're's become kind of a go-to. Okay. Okay. But you're eating buns. We're still having bread. Yes. And bacon. Bread and bacon.

Yeah. Okay. Just seeing where you're at. What should be the default mustard when someone says with mustard? Yellow mustard, spicy brown mustard, or a third mustard? When you say spicy brown, are we talking about like the sweet kind or like a- I would call that a Dijon. But I'm thinking of like a spicy Gooden's brown deli mustard

versus like a yellow mustard. It should be grainy. Grainy. But not too sweet. Grainy, but not too sweet. Okay. Okay. You find yourself in a classic good son situation.

You're at the edge of a cliff. Groot is hanging from one arm. Baby Yoda is hanging from the other. You have the strength to save one. Who do you save? So somebody just told me there's like a baby yoda pete thing going on on the internet um so i guess i gotta side with yoda wow okay i'm i'm still not totally i mean i think that's correct of what it is i think it's correct i feel like i need to i need to take a

stand here well i don't know what's happening with with baby yoda pete on twitter i don't know right the moment when i more or less uh withdraw from spending too much time on twitter this baby yoda thing comes up it seems pretty cool cool. Next question. Yeah. Stop filibustering. Is Adam Driver hot? Some mysteries are just beyond, I think, what we can really speak to with yes or no. Okay. But you know about Adam Driver. He's from Mishawaka, which is basically the Eagleton to our Pawnee in South Bend. So he's basically from South Bend. So we're going to claim him. All right. The answer is. But I guess it means he must be hot. Okay.

We got there. We got there. Follow up. Chris Evans, Chris Pratt, Chris Pine or Chris Hemsworth? Chris Pine was in the Star Trek one, right? Correct. Oh, wait. But Chris Pratt was in Parks and Recreation.

Correct. Indiana Connection. Got to go with him. All right. For the record, he said he would fuck Chris Pratt. All right. We'll not be looking at Mayor Pete for the rest of the interview you've been critiqued

for being too sympathetic to corporations this show is literally about local government in Indiana how can I not side with I get it I got where the answer came from I respected the answer now the spirit of ugly sweater parties was to find sweaters made with love but bad taste the creator did not intend to make an ugly sweater

then corporations jump on the bandwagon and they start making ugly sweaters made with love but bad taste, the creator did not intend to make an ugly sweater. Then corporations jump on the bandwagon and they start making ugly sweaters on purpose, thereby not only eliminating the authenticity of the wear of the sweater, but almost destroying the ugly sweater party as an institution. Any comment? Well, these things have cycles. So the way I see it is is it's no longer ironic to wear an ugly sweater that might have once not been thought to be now i just confused myself i don't know what was the question it's not there was none there's the the authenticity of the ugly sweater party was that someone made a sweater with love i see but terrible taste, was an aunt or a grandmother who just knitted a pattern.

And then I guess the goal was then to mock that person for their expression of love amongst your peers. But then corporations got on the bandwagon and was like, actually, we can do the work of a thousand grandmas for very little money, maybe abroad and ship them. But with none of the love.

But with none of the love. Yeah, none of the built-in insult to those who had made the sweaters. Yes. Again, still no question. Just looking for your feedback on this philosophical conundrum on authenticity and capitalism. Yeah. Final question. It's been reported that you play Risk online.

True. You play Risk pretty often you play Risk online. True. You play Risk pretty often with your husband or on occasion? Yeah. Well, get ready for a big surprise. Elijah, can we please fly in the Risk board? Oh, wow. All right. You are green.

I am green. That's good. For those listening at home, Mayor Pete has the continent of Australia. He has a strong redoubt in Southeast Asia. That's key. He has some holdings in Alaska into Northeastern Asia. There is an orange team that controls Europe. South America is lost.

What's your next move? Where are you going to go from? What are you going to go from? What are you going to do here? Wow. I think I'm going to run up. Is that a horse in Alaska or is that just a guy? I think that's a horse.

I think you have that's multiple troops. Elijah came with a pretty good scenario. Pretty good scenario. I think I'm going to come up through India and Afghanistan, actually, and get into Europe. I don't think it's too late to take Europe. It's not too late to take Europe. That is correct. Not going to get himself bogged down in a land war in Asia. A classic mistake, as you see it, has been really the death of the orange team. Mayor Pete, thank you for playing clean for a day. Thank you for being on Love It or Leave It. Thank you. Guys, give it up for Mayor Pete. Hey, don't go anywhere.

There's more of Love It or Leave It coming up. And we're back. Woo! Less than an hour ago, the 39th Democratic debate ended right here in Los Angeles, just as you all were filing into our show at the Improv. That means none of you weird, politically

obsessed incels, I'm sorry, turn on me. I like the challenge of getting you back. None of you know what happened. And I bet that eats you alive. I bet you were furious we didn't have it on screen as you walked in I bet you tried to stream it on your phones But forgot your cable login

So you frantically tried to reset your password And by the time you figured it out it was too late Because you were already here Having no idea what happened So we want to fill you in on all the fun from tonight In a game we're calling I Can't Believe Yang and Steyr Kissed Here's how it works It's a lightning round from tonight in a game we're calling I Can't Believe Yang and Steyr Kissed.

Here's how it works. It's a lightning round. I'm going to read a list of things that may or may not have happened, and then you'll have to say whether it's real or fake. Would someone out there like to play? Elise is in the house. Oh, no, come over here. No, no, this is our spot.

You know what, sir? It's fine, all right? You're a white man in America. You've had plenty of gifts. Hi, welcome back. Hi. What's your name? Kersi.

Kersi. Yeah. Good to see you. Nice to see you, too. Is it the first time or have you played a game? This is the first time. And you've been here many times. Mm-hmm.

Very exciting. And you're in a Ponte of the World shirt, which I appreciate. And you've got a Love It or Leave-hmm. Very exciting. And you're in a Ponte of the World shirt, which I appreciate. Yeah. And you got a Love It or Leave It hat. Take money out of politics-themed games. Really buying influence over there. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. I got it on clearance.

Wow. Merch burn! Wow. I'm sorry, Kiersey. That's incorrect. A different slam than you thought you were delivering. Kiersey, here's how it works. I'm going to read you what may or may not have happened in the debate. If it's real, say real. If it's fake, say fake.

Are you ready? Sure. Tom Steyer spent an entire answer giving Bernie Sanders a thoughtful compliment. True. Fake. Klobuchar said that James Madison was a good president because he was 5'4". Okay, he did, she did

say the 5'4 comment, but I don't think it was about James Madison. No, it was. You got it. I'm giving it to you. You overthought it. You lost your nerve, but you had it. Trust your instincts, Kirstie. But I will say this. I love anyone who reminds people that presidents used to be

five foot four. Joe Biden called Devin Nunes a nincompoop. True. False. Wow. I watched the whole thing and I thought that was true. Klobuchar announced she plans on building a fridge to the next century. True.

It happened. She did say fridge. She did. And I honestly wasn't sure She did say fridge. She did. It was so cold. And I honestly wasn't sure if she meant fridge. Yeah, she's like, we're going to build a nice cold space against climate change. Makes you think. Warren said the phrase, billionaires in wine caves should not pick the next president of the United States. True. It is true.

Klobuchar responded by saying, I have never even been to a wine cave. I have been to a wind cave. Yeah. That's true. Klobuchar responded by saying, I have never even been to a wine cave. I have been to a wind cave. Yeah. That's true. In the middle of the debate, unprompted by any of the moderators, all seven candidates agreed to observe a 90-second moment of silence

for the late Republican John McCain. No. Didn't happen. When he thought he was off camera, Buttigieg took a sip of water and it dribbled out of his mouth and onto his suit. No. Wait. Did that happen?

This is real. I didn't even see that. Yes? Where was I? You know what? I put it loud in my home while I was getting ready for the show. I missed a key visual. Did you answer? Yes. Great. Joe Biden said, the middle class is behind the eight ball, which is maybe the nickname of a person he knows from Scranton? Yeah, probably. Correct.

Joe Biden said about China, girlfriend, you are so on. No, that was Marianne Williamson like 5,000 debates ago. The moderator looked at Tom Steyer and said, Mr. Yang, and then Andrew Yang clapped and said, hey, Judy, I'm over here. Yes. Correct.

When they didn't come to Warren for a question, she yelled, damn it, into the mic. No. That happened. Tom Steyer called China a frenemy. Yes. Senator Amy Klobuchar directed a swipe at Bernie Sanders, saying America doesn't want to pay for bleeding heart liberal policies, then quickly added that bleeding heart was not a reference to Sanders' recent heart attack.

Yeah. No. No. Yeah. Mayor Pete referred to himself as a gay dude. Yes. When asked about being an older male candidate and Bernie screamed at the mic,

and I'm white as well, and the audience did not react. Yeah. It happened. Elizabeth Warren laid out a detailed policy proposal and Amy Klobuchar said that it seems nice like Baby Yoda, but just like Baby Yoda, it's not real. No.

No, it was fake. Tom Steyer suggested everyone on stage go out for drinks after this. Yeah. No. More than once, Elizabeth Warren said the word daddy. No. She did.

Buttigieg said the following sentence, and I quote, I live right by the river. Yeah. Correct. Klobuchar called Mayor Pete a local official. Yes. In one of the most Amy Klobuchar withering comments that gives you just a window in the tense, high-pressure stakes of being on her team said,

I am not going to stand here and denigrate a local official. And you just felt like, wow, this woman could destroy you with an offhand comment. Well, she was like in the backstage eating a salad with a comb, so. Joe Biden told a story that was confusing, but seems like it might be about how he saw a ghost once. True. Elizabeth Warren asked Mayor Pete if he was alive on 9-11. No. No.

When asked about the small Tupperware container resting on his podium, Senator Bernie Sanders responded that it was soup and refused to clarify it further. No. Andrew Yang said that there was a pretty good chance we were living in a simulation. Yes. No, but you could see him saying it. Yeah. Elizabeth Warren said gamers' rights are human rights.

No. No. That would be Yang. That would be a Yang thing to say. And finally, Joe Biden said, I'm the best candidate to beat Trump, and I'm going to beat him like a drum. I'm going to crack his fucking head wide open in front of everybody. And just about the time that I'm coming out of jail, hopefully he'll be coming out of his coma. And guess what?

I'll fucking split his head open again, because I'm fucking stupid. I don't give a fuck about jail. That's my business. That's what I do. No, but it would be nice to hear. It would be nice to hear it would be nice to hear you've won the game great job kersi guys give it up for kersi when we come back the rant will don't go anywhere this is love it or leave, and there's more cute. I refuse. For as long as I live, I plan to never, ever, ever learn about wine. Ever. I don't want to know the difference. I don't want to know which are red and which are white

because here's why. I don't. I really don't. I really, really don't. Because as far as I can tell, the only thing that happens when you learn about wine is you come to hate cheap wine and have an appreciation for more expensive wine. Whereas right now, it all tastes like bad grape juice to me, which puts all wine at an equal playing field, which is just lifetime average, going to save me a ton of money.

So what are we learning about wine for? I took a wine class in college, and it was like, all right, I don't know, Okie, what are we doing here? What are we doing here? This is a crazy way to celebrate our one shared drug. I don't know, Oki, what are we doing here? What are we doing here? This is a crazy way to celebrate our one shared drug. I lived in Paris for a while. It's not a big deal. We don't need to keep talking about it.

But I lived in Paris for a while, and I tried for like two and a half minutes to learn something about wine. But mostly I would just go buy the cheapest five euro bottle of wine. And because I preferred it cold, I would take red wine and put it in the freezer. And because it was such garbage quality, it would freeze like a slushie. And then I would drink it and get wasted. That's what I know from my time in Paris. Wow.

It was a very elegant time. Wow. Très chic. Indeed. And we're back. Now it's time for the rant wheel. You know how it works. We spin the wheel wherever it lands.

We rant about the topic. This week on the wheel, we have Kumail Nanjiani's glow-up, Star Wars Rise of Skywalker, Whoopi vs. Meghan McCain, new Christmas songs, Adam Driver's attitude, hot chocolate, ugly sweaters, and the war on Christmas.

Let's spin the wheel. It has landed on Kumail Nanjiani's glow-up. There we were, all living our lives, unaware of a transformation that had been unfolding all around us, which is, in my view, unholy. Because Kumail Nanjiani decided from going from a comedian shape to a Marvel superhero shape. And, look, I get the desire.

Every comedian wants to be Marvel-shaped, and every guy that's Marvel-shaped wants to be a comedian. That's the world. That's the order of things, all right? And it's safe, all right? And with so much chaos all around us, with so many norms and institutions unable to stand up to the frenetic,

endless uncertainty and division and partisanship of this age. The line between the comedian and the Marvel superhero was uncrossable. And now what has he done? Think of the door that he has opened. Think of all of the husky, angry, embittered comedians who are going to suddenly one day pop up in our Instagrams, look at like Chris Evans. It's unacceptable. Someone said carrot top. Great example. Unholy. example, unholy. And I want you to know that within 10 seconds of seeing that Instagram and

verifying via no actual process that it was in some way real, I did immediately direct message Kumail and say, I take this as a personal affront. I will be talking about it on Love It or Leave It, and you are welcome to join for a counterpoint.

And I believe, with every fiber of my being, that the old Kumail would have responded. But not this new Kumail. The comedian-shaped Kumail would have said, ha ha, would love to do it, but I'm busy though. Not this

Kumail. Not Not this Kumail. Not the Marvel Kumail. He's changed. Let's spin it again. It has landed on New Christmas Song, suggested by Josh. Hi. I have some thoughts. And there's all these new Christmas songs

and I have opinions. And I know you guys are probably thinking, why should we listen to your opinions on Christmas songs, you Jew? To which I would say, very anti-Semitic audience. I can't believe you even thought that. First of all, anti-Semitic.

Second of all, I'm the perfect person to talk about Christmas songs because Christmas songs to me aren't tradition. I don't come to them with rose-colored glasses and biased thoughts. They're just a fact of life for me, Christmas songs. They're inescapable and inseparable from the time between Thanksgiving and New Year's. Some radio stations play only Christmas songs for a length of time, which is ridiculous because Christmas songs aren't even all the same genre. Have you ever thought of that? They're just all about Christmas. You don't just group songs by

the topic they're about. You wouldn't be like, here's a radio station that plays songs about sleep. You're going to hear Frere Jacques and Enter Sandman. You can't just be like they're all about santa they're all the same that that jingle bells and santa baby those are two very different genres of music the old christmas songs have been grandfathered in even like wonderful christmas time right it's like we're never you're never gonna bump that the list just grows every year there's like a new christmas song and i have a simple rule for whether we should allow it into the canon. Here's what I think makes a good Christmas song. It's a simple rule. It's if it's a good song. That's it. Is it a good song? Great. Let's listen to it at Christmas. Any Christmas song. And here's the rubric, right? Because you think,

Josh, are you the arbiter of good taste and what's good music? No, that's not for me. This is you have to look deep down inside your own heart. This is the test. A good Christmas song is a Christmas song you could hear and be happy to hear while wearing shorts because it's out of season, right? And I know this is Los Angeles where it doesn't get that cold, but it was 50 degrees today and I saw a guy driving a convertible with a space heater between his legs. So that's it. Whether you can wear shorts because a good song is a good song all year legs. So that's it. Whether you can wear shorts, because a good song is a good song all year round, right? Every good song is good in the summer and the winter.

Nelly's Hot in Her is a great song even when it's cold in there. On the flip side... You have been waiting 12 years to make that joke. It is the purest expression of my comedic sensibility. Meanwhile, John Legend and Kelly Clarkson recorded a remake of Baby It's Cold Outside, and if it's hot outside, you would say, turn it the fuck off. And if someone tried to play Frosty the Snowman at a Fourth of July barbecue,

it would be an act so deranged you would be tied down like Hannibal Lecter for fear you would start grilling human flesh. Thank you, and happy Hanukkah, everyone. Let's spin it again. It has landed on the war on Christmas, on our very Christmas-themed episode.

So I grew up in Palm Springs, California. Thank you. The Paris of California. The Paris of California. I grew up amongst retirees, and I was the only child in my neighborhood. Thanks. And I didn't own a coat until i was 18

and um and then uh yeah and then like to me christmas is about like putting lights around the cactus uh so that's how what i think of when you know all this like it's white outside and christmas like just rings untrue to me um but so, you know, but thank you to the Jews who wrote the song. Whatever. It was our pleasure. But I am, so I'm an Iranian-American Muslim, like all of you, and I was just like, I'm

back home for Christmas in Palm Springs and I was flipping through the radio stations. I live in New York City normally, so you don't flip through very many radio stations. Thank you. Yes. New York. There's a fan, one fan. She was just hearing for not the radio. Right, not. So I was flipping through the radio, and Glenn Beck appeared, as he's known to do, and he was saying, now's the time when liberals like to have their war on Christmas. And I was just like, when was the first time that anyone thought there was ever a fucking war on Christmas?

There has literally never been an actual war on Christmas. It's just been entirely invented so that liberals can be like, oh, happy holidays, I guess, because I guess there was a war on Christmas. But there was never the first person that had a war. No one was mad. I'm a Muslim. The 5,000 times that people have said to me, Merry Christmas, I've been like, yeah, Merry Christmas, buddy, whatever.

Like, I don't care. I have never cared. So the notion of there ever having been a war on Christmas was completely invented by the right. And I think Christmas is great. We have a nice Muslim Christmas in my household. You know, my mom likes to make a turkey and stuff it with saffron rice. It's a lovely American tradition. And so my point is, from my, like, Merry

Christmas from my very Muslim heart to all of you. There's no war on Christmas. It's also funny. The war on Christmas obviously is very silly. But it is true that like, if there is any kind of holiday war

taking place, it is one in which Christmas is the aggressor, slowly eating more and more of the calendar. Christmas is just spreading democracy to November. Let's spin it again. It has landed on Star Wars Rise of Skywalker. Originally, my plan was to leave from the recording of this episode and drive directly to the Arclight to watch it.

However, I went to the premiere, fuckers. All right. Yeah. Have Ronan Farrow will travel. Anywho, I will not spoil it even for a second. Don't worry. If you're listening to this, do not panic. I will only say this because it was something I did not want to wait until January to talk about this,

which is this is not a spoiler because this is something that J.J. Abrams hinted at in the promotions, which he said, there's an LGBT moment. And if you remember what I said on this stage, is that I hope that what I do not see is a tiny, insignificant gay moment because I don't want them to get credit for that. If at this point you do not want to know

a tiny, tiny little dumb thing about this film, I would hit 30 seconds forward. Right now, I'm giving you a second. It's one fucking gay kiss in the background, so insignificant they didn't cut it for China. In the background? It's, you blink and you'll fucking miss it. Who kissed?

You're making it sound like it was extras kissing. No, they were not extras. They were not. Were they actually in the story? They were not extras, but their number on the call sheets were double digits, is all I'm going to say. What a bummer, right? I mean, I. Was one of them tentacled?

The chorus asks, no sir. And I will say, that wasn't even a gay thing, that was just very pro-tentacles.

And so, here is what we are left with, friends. There have been nine stories in the Star Wars Saga. Eleven if you count Rogue One and Solo.

I only count Rogue One. Twelve if you count Free Solo, which nobody does. Which nobody does. Nobody does. And here we are. These films have been made for 30 years. It is a universe with, as far as I can tell, millions of planets filled with all kinds of shapes and sized people and aliens.

And the only gay character in the whole universe is a fucking mincing protocol droid. And I am very frustrated by it. I'm with Elizabeth Warren on this. Star Wars needs big structural change. That's right. Episode 10, there's pegging. All right.

Speaking of big structural change, let's end on a high note. The time for complaining is over. It's here. 2020 is upon us. And I just want everybody who can to take a break this holiday. Turn off your phone if you can. Tune out as much as possible.

Sleep late. Download a meditation app. Sign up for the subscription and never use it again. Do some yoga. Because when we wake up on January 2nd, we need to look at that calendar and find a weekend, two weekends, ten weekends,

plan a trip to the closest swing state near you. Tweeting is no longer enough. Protesting is no longer enough. Calling your congressperson is no longer enough. It's time to knock on some doors. It's time to talk to every voter in every swing state you possibly can. If it's Warren, you're gonna stop worrying about electability,

and you're gonna put your boots on the ground. If it's B... If it's Biden, you're gonna stop thinking about corn pop and his bloody eye, and you're gonna put boots on the ground. If it's Bernie, you're gonna stop complaining about Bernie Bros online, and you're gonna become a Bernie Bro. And if it's Buttigieg, you're gonna learn that fucking dance, and you're gonna like become a birdie bro. And if it's Buttigieg, you're going to learn that fucking dance

and you're going to like it. I'm not. Enjoy your Christmas. Enjoy your Hanukkah. Enjoy your New Year's. Because 2020 is going to be a long year and the closer we get to the election, the more the stakes will weigh on all of us. And I just want us to keep in mind all the

twists and turns, all the emotional highs and lows, all of it will fade when we see the results and when we're watching those results we won't be in control of what happens but we want everyone listening to this 11 months from now to watch those returns knowing they did all they could to get the result that we wanted so eat up this holiday break have a great time because 2020 is the year America hits its goal weight. I want to thank Nagin Farsad, Josh Gondelman, Mayor Pete Buttigieg, The Improv, Nancy Pelosi, Adam Schiff,

all the House Democrats, except for like three of them. Raina's last show as an intern, thank you. Elisa, Nar, Milo, Bill, Frank, Travis, Alexis, Jesse, Jamie, Belinda, Tanya, Elijah, Sarah Wick, Sarah Geismar, everybody at Crooked who makes this show possible, and everyone who came out tonight, and everyone who listens, happy holidays, happy new year, have a great night! Love It or Leave It is a product of Cook and Me. It is written and produced by me, John Lovett, A. Lisa Gutierrez, Lee Eisenberg,

our head writer and Michael Bloomberg speech writer, Travis Helwig, and writers Jocelyn Kaufman, Alicia Carroll, and Peter Miller. Bill Lance is our editor and Frank Tadek is our sound engineer. Our theme song is written and performed by Sure Sure. Thanks to our designers, Jesse McLean and Jamie Skeel for creating and running all of our visuals, which you can't see because this is a podcast. And to our digital producers, Narmal Konian and Yael Freed for

filming and editing video each week so you can.