Macrodosing: Arian Foster and PFT Commenter - Christmas

Episode Date: December 21, 2021

On today's episode of Macrodosing, the entire crew is back on Zoom and talking about Christmas. All of the amazing things and conspiracies about the most wonderful time of the year. Also, a little bit of firearms talk AND Arian finally learned how to complete a Rubik's cube. All of this and more on the show. Macrodosing is presented by DatChat.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/macrodosing

Hey, macrodosing listeners, you can find us every Tuesday and Thursday on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Welcome back to Macrodosing, the best podcast that you can find anywhere on the internet. This podcast is presented by our great friends over at DatChat. I'm on DatChat. I go on there a few times a week, interact with listeners of this show. It's actually a really fun social media and messaging app. You should check it out.

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We can like messages. We chat with Barcelona sports talent over there. You can talk about the biggest sports games on TV. You can talk about The Bachelor with cutting stems, pop culture with chicks in the office, conspiracy theories or whatever you want to with us, and so much more across all of our franchises. You can download the app today. Make sure to join our page to talk all things related to macrodosing.

Join the macrodosing page. We'll be on there. We respond to the threads. We interact with you guys. It's a lot of fun. Download datchat for iPhone and Android in the app stores right now. Or you can get to get to datchat.com slash barstool to get more info and download dat chat today. I recently learned how to do a Rubik shoot.

Yeah. It's all I've been doing. Isn't it? You just have to like twist it four different ways. repeat the pattern? No. I do. No, so it's like, it's algorithmic is what they call it.

So, like, each, like, what you want to do has an algorithm to it. And so there is a pattern, but, like, there's a different pattern for different things that you want to do. Like, if you want to displace a side piece and put it to the left, there's an algorithm for that. And so, like, you're just memorizing all the algorithms. So one of the people who, like, speed does them. The thing is insane. Like, you have to practice it. At least you have to do all fucking day.

Like, fuck that's what I mean. He was just like he had a pattern that he knew and he just kept doing that and it would just turn out perfect every time. I was like, all right. That could be the guy. I haven't seen that. It could be the case, though. All right, do it.

Mixed up real quick. I want to see you, I want to see the master work. No, I don't know how to do it that fast. That's what I'm saying. I can do it in like three, four, three or four minutes. All right, go for it here. All right. Okay, hold on.

Not the pressure's on. No, don't fucking time me, bro. No, we had a great week for downloads last week. So this week will be a podcast listening to Arian Foster, do a Rubik's Cube. Bounce out. No YouTube. You must listen. Yeah.

And trust when we say, I got it, that I got it. Yeah. No, you can maybe narrate it like, okay, I've got a red one in the top right corner. All right, now it's in the middle. Play-by-play guy doing Rubik's cube. would be fucking hilarious. Imagine Joe Buck, Joe Buck trying to do that shit.

I would listen to Gus Johnson do that shit for sure, though. Yeah. Kevin Harlan would be good too. Kevin Harlan gets excited about stuff. Harlan's when something happens that shouldn't be like, what was the squirrel on the field or the cat on the field? He loves it when there's a cat, yeah. When things go awry, Kevin Harlan's your guy.

It was a Celtics box game on national TV that he had and someone fell into the first row and spilled a beer and he talked about it for the next like 15 minutes and it was the best who's the guy who's the shot at Hornets

announced that fucking dude is a high that's a good team that dude be hype as hell and always at the right moments too he doesn't get hype over nonsense like it a lot of people

they're always just like yelling or they have no tell he does it correctly which I appreciate it got that uh got one side already see we work there we go let's go I don't know he's piss me off I'd always get one side but then you'd have to ruin the one side you just did to get another side not necessarily um I said there's a there's a it took me it took me a good day to figure this shit out because like I was looking I was like I'm a 30 plus

she's old and I don't know how to fucking do a Rubik she was pissing me off so I just dedicated myself aren't there like different solutions like there are different there's different methods like three or four different methods and so depending on which one you learn there's a beginning like I'm on the beginning method like there's ways to like tweak it to what because I could do it like talking I'm too distracted but like I can do it with like under three minutes is my my best time is two minutes and 55 seconds but there's ways to tweak what you already know in order to get it down around under a minute and then there's people who could do it in like under 10 seconds.

And most people are fucking ridiculous. We had one of those guys on part of my take one time. It was a Rubik's Cube expert. I think he was at one point the world record holder for it. And he could do that shit where he just looked at it, put it behind his back. And then did the Rubik's cube and brought it back out. And it was, it was good to go. It was crazy how good this guy was.

Are you talking about logic? No, no, logic's good at it too. There was the other guy that was friends with Ryan Fitzpatrick. Ryan Fitzpatrick became friends with a Rubik's Cube expert because a lot like Erie Foster, Fitsy wanted to learn how to do Rubik's cubes. And so he started like watching tapes started going, I think he went to a Rubik's Cube convention. And he became friends with one of the best guys in the world at it. He listened to part of my take when we were talking about Rubik's cubes, DM, Big Cat, and then said, hey, you should interview this dude. And we had him

in the studio. And he was just, he was insanely fat. He could do one-handed. He knew the difference. like he had special, special cubes, like speed cubes that he would go out and buy. I love the idea of Ryan Fitzpatrick grinding tape on Rubik's cubes. Yeah. Let's start to show off just by, I'm curious to know who here has had a gun pulled on them at any point. I have. You have? Yeah.

It wasn't like necessarily at me, like, give me your money or anything like that, but I was like, you know, in an area. and um i mean in a cry like in a designated area and then you scatter yes like a gun pulling area nah well it's like you know like it's not directed at one person like y'am motherfuckers but you know what I'm saying like you've seen um you've seen um uh shit white men can't jump where he's like I'm gonna go to my car get my gun shoot everybody's ad and then he he jumps the fence gets and before he jumps the fence everybody's scatters.

It was kind of like that. Gotcha. And another dude who said he was going to go get his gun. And we was like, no, the fuck, you ain't. And so we jumped him. I shouldn't have announced it first. It's better to be proactive in those situations. I always say.

Yeah, that guy's a fucking idiot for being like, wait here while I get my gun. I don't have it on me yet. But when I do. It's a brilliant interesting story. So the guy was fucking insane. Like, I respect. him because he walked into the party and it was like nobody knew him and so like when he walked in

but it was like nobody I didn't know him no I was ever like y'all know like nah I know this dude and all of a sudden he just kind of started like tweaking like he was just like yeah man I don't know man I don't know I don't know motherfuckers around here was like oh he's on drugs and so my man's like you got a dip man and he was like what's up with you and then that was cue everybody just russed him so my man pushed him out the door but he was like a big old hub dude super jack And so we pushed him off the first floor balcony, right? So before he says, I'm trying to go get my gun. That's when we all started to rush him.

And so we pushed him off the first floor balcony. He sticks the landing, and we all jump off, and then we just start beating his ass. And so we really lay in it on them. We all pretty big dudes. So he takes off, but he's just on drugs. makes three consecutive rights and ends up in the front of the house, right? But, and apparently that the cops was right by, and so the neighbors heard what was going on.

And so they called the cops. Cops stop him outside of the front of the jump. And it was like, yo, what happened? And he was like, oh, no. And it was like, did you get to a fight? He was like, no, I fell. And I was like, I respect the fuck out of that. He started the shit.

took the ass drugs, yeah, he didn't want to do the cops that's facts but yeah I took it more as like you know he he wasn't

he was he started this shit so he ain't going to get the law involved when you start the shit like I respected it for you know a little bit

you must have been so confused after making three rights like the drugs must have fucked him up so he'd been like way I'm stuck in this in an alternate dimension imagine

going into a party you don't know anybody and you're just like trying to make friends and you just start yelling you have a guy Nah, no, he wasn't trying to make friends, man. We'd welcome them, but he was, it was just like, the way he was pacing,

and he wanted problems, and I just wasn't, I won't with it. Billy, have you ever had a gun pulled on it? I've had an asshole friend. We were at a shooting range, like, not practice good gun safety, where he was, like, pointing it even though it wasn't loaded. That's not good. So just, like, not, like, in a dangerous situation. I pointed a gun at you the other week though

Yeah but I already checked those guns Yeah Bill who is her firearm safety consultant on set What could go wrong there? Yeah What about you, Big T? Fortunately no, I've avoided that so far Yeah Have you ever pulled a gun on anyone?

No No one who is on your property I don't know a firearm Wow, so you're like theoretically pro gun no i'm i'm i'm pro gun you don't have to own one to be pro gut well first of i live in new york city you can't own a gun it's kind of weird to be like super super passionate about gun ownership and not i'm not super passionate i'm just i'm pro so hold on what is the gun laws in new york oh they're so they're so strict so to get a gun it's crazy you have to go through i mean they take you

probably year but then you can only um you can't carry a gun anywhere no you so the only people who are allowed to conceal carry our law enforcement officers or housing there's uh the people that do evictions yeah the people who do evictions those are the two people who can carry a gun so when i was boxing uh all my coaches a bunch of my coaches were former police officers so they all were just rolling with guns just at all time one time like one of them had an unloaded gun in his uh pocket he was showing me something and the gun dropped out and I was like what the fuck yeah in college I remember uh I was in a I think the class was like a constitutional law class it was like on the bill of rights and the professor told her story about a woman who uh was from Tennessee and she traveled up to

New York and was at the 9-11 memorial and sees a sign that says no firearms allowed under any circumstances walks up to a cop and says what should I do with my gun and the cop says uh We're going to go jail. And she went to jail and the judge letter, I think she got like she can never go back to New York again, but she got out of it. Being honest, yeah. Yeah, what a thing to do. But yeah, you can't have a gun anywhere in New York.

I had a gun in New York for about two and a half years, though. Really? Low key. I was low key, a handgun owner. Yeah. So when we went out of Texas for the Super Bowl back in 2016, 2017, I bought a gun as a bit for, were the Canadian boys sketch that we were doing on Comedy Central. So I was like showing how easy it was to get a gun.

I was like from Canada. I brought like all my documentation, three letters or references for my neighbors saying what a good person I was to purchase this gun. And they're like, no, you just literally need to sign here on the bottom line. We'll give you the pistol. And so bought the gun. I was going to give it back to Chaps. I was going to give it to Chaps or sell it to him for a dollar because that's how easy

it is to sell a gun in Texas. And then Chaps was going to take it back to San Antonio. But Chaps' daughter got sick that day. So he had to leave early. So I'm stuck with a firearm going back to New York. I don't know what to do with it. I don't want to just go out in the street and like, I don't want to throw in a trash can because it's a gun that's,

it's been, you know, my name is on the paperwork for it. So long story short, it makes the trip back to New York on the RV. And then it just kind of lives in a box in my apartment for about two years. Actually, there's been somebody else's apartment for a little bit.

Sure was. Yeah. And I was like, you know what, I need to take responsibility for this gun because if it gets stolen from his apartment, then I'm fucked and he's fucked and he shouldn't be in this position where he's got my gun. So I, then I took ownership of the gun, did some research. Apparently you can turn in a firearm at any local police precinct here in Manhattan. There's a buyback program. I think they give you 200 bucks. So eventually I work up the courage to go to the police

station to turn in my gun i put in my backpack that was a very nervous walk that i was making i was like i really hope that my backpack doesn't yeah what do they do if you get caught like just a you know what something happens and a cop you know searches you and you're like oh well i was just taking it to the police station to turn it in yeah i i don't know if they'd buy that i think i'd tell them the first like the first word i would say to them would be i'm on my way to the station right now just heads up but i get to the police station it's supposed to be totally anonymous The first thing they asked me, like, sir, what's your name?

And I was like, I would, I'd prefer to not tell you my name. And then they're like, okay, they start filling out the paperwork. They asked me again, they're like, why don't you just tell me your name, though? And I was like, I'm not trying to be a dick here, but I read it on the website and I know the law that this is completely anonymous. I don't have to say my name if I don't want to. And they're like, okay, okay. They bring out another guy to be like, to try to get me to tell him my name.

And I'm like, listen, I'm trying to do the right thing here. I just don't want to say my name. And the guy that they brought out is like, hey, you're the dude from part of my take. I was like, God damn. All right. So, so much for none. Yeah, exactly. So I gave him the gun, got my $200 and it's off my hands now.

But it seems like me and Aaron are really the only two pro-gun people on this podcast. So I looked it up. So concealed carry, like to just carry around the city is almost impossible again, unless you're a cop or a housing authority. But you can get, like, premise licenses, carry business, limited carry, special carry. So basically, this is in New York State. So you could have, you could technically have a gun license for a premise, which is, yeah, it's easy to get to have a gun if you're, you know, outside of the city and use it for hunting. Plenty people do that. But in the city, it's like, almost impossible.

Holy, what's your gun story? I'm sure that you have a gun story. why are you sure that I have a gun story you just give off like I've been exposed to firearms vibes no offense I mean I've seen my fair share of firearms I'm not a big fan um I've had a real and a fake one pointed in my general direction and it feels the same when you don't know it's fake um and it's not something you're like willing to risk finding out if it's real or fake um but yeah it's not a it just really is like the great equalizer, which is why I don't like them. Like, anyone can be on the other side of that and they're the toughest guy in the world.

You get to, you take them away and now all of a sudden you get to earn that shit. I'm not a fan, not a fan at all. Yeah, the fake gun does feel the same, I'm told. My great uncle, George, he told me this story when I was like 12 years old or maybe even younger, maybe like 10 years old. And it was, it's crazy. One time back in the mid to late. 70s he went to a bank down in North Carolina and it was him and one other person in the bank

and a guy comes in to rob the place and he pulls out a revolver and he's just pointing out all the cashiers points it at him he's like everybody down the ground get down get down get down all the cashiers like hit the deck my uncle's like yeah I didn't I didn't want to get down I was like I'm I'll stand here in the corner but I'm not laying down on the ground you can't make me lie down on the ground and the guy walked up to him pointed the gun in his face And my uncle was like, I looked at the revolver. And, you know, the chambers should be perfectly round. It should be a perfectly round circle.

This one was oval. And I was like, that's not a real gun. And he just stood there staring. And he was willing to take that chance that it wasn't a real gun. So the robber ends up completing the robbery and then leaves. My uncle goes to the back room, brings out a still picture. The police gave him a framed picture of him during the robbery to be like, you were the biggest fucking idiot we've ever seen.

And it's this, it's this hippie-looking dude pointing a gun directly in my great-uncle's face and my great-uncle sitting there like an asshole, like an idiot, not moving, just like staring at him. Was the gun real in the end? He doesn't know. He doesn't think that it was. To this day, he still swears that it wasn't real because the, what do you call it? Those are, is it the chamber when it's a collective of them?

I don't know what that, that round part is called. It's like a six shooter. Yeah. Yeah, let me look it up. Yeah, I believe that it was fake because he's still alive to tell the story. I think 99% of people that Rob don't want to kill also. Like, I think they just want to give the illusion that they, you know, it can if they would, if they have to. But also, I finished.

There we go. That's a legit cube, too. That's one that you can't take the stickers off of. and move around. No, no, no, you can't do that. No, no, no. Those are whack. And my little, so what I've also found out on my subsequent cube research.

I've been watching, like, Cube videos and shit is that, um, so, like, a lot of people like, will cheat and they'll, like, take it off and, like, you know, twist the corner, like, if they're just a corner off or something like that, but that actually fucks up the rotation of it also if, like, you can't figure it out again, like, honestly. And so, like, it's an honor system as well. Mm-hmm. Yeah. congratulations on learning how to do that

it sounds like it would take too long I would be into it for the first five minutes and then I get really impatient with YouTube video and be like yeah it took about a day to do it without looking at the video oh my God so I'm actually looking at like down the barrel

of the six shooters and some of them kind of look oval in their real yeah yeah you're gonna be real confident and you're not knowledge of gun barrels. He's an idiot. He's an idiot for doing that.

No question about it. He was positive. He knew every gun manufacturers. That's great. Now, I'm going to be, so I've always thought about that. Like, you know, when you look at airsoft guns, that look pretty real. You can kind of tell by the barrel, they're airsoft or, you know, because they have, like, a thinner barrel. You can, like, see the tip of it's orange.

I've always been like, yeah. anyone sticks a gun in my face, and I'm going to try to determine if it's real or not and see if it's like a fake airsoft gun. I think it would see. They just have no interest in caring if it's really not like. Yeah. For what am I concerned?

I'll lay down. Yeah, exactly. I'm face down. You want me on my back. Yeah. Can I have a pillow? What's the protocol here? I don't want to get shot by an airsoft gun either.

That shit hurts. Yeah, not that close in your face? Oh, my God. Bro, the first time I ever played paintball was like 12, 13 and the homies had him and just something on some backyard shit and I thought it was just like it explodes and it's soft

like no dog I had welts on my skin he hit me one time and I was like time out what the fuck I'm not playing this no more what the fuck and I never I think I play one more time as an adult but other than that like that shit hurts that's not for me you should play paintball one time it's fucking offensive though I'll go

but I'm going to be suited to the boots though I'm going to have like I'm gonna be I'm gonna have elbow pads I'm gonna have all that shit though my hands suck my friend I just hid the whole time

so I didn't get anything on me so did you win yeah I stayed it was like one of those things where it's like your it's like teams and my team won and I just would stay behind the whatever barrier

like the wooden like whatever and I just would stay there and I never got you were camping you were at like in Call of Duty I like that Is that bad? I don't know. No, that's how I play. I just didn't want to get shot. There are people, especially, like, where I was.

Like, I was at college that was, like, middle of nowhere, Ohio. That, like, that's what they do every, every Saturday. And, you know, that's their hobby. So they had, like, their own guns, their own gear. They had, like, camo, like, team jerseys. And I was like, I don't want to fuck with any of you. Like, I'm, I don't have the energy or the skill to. do this. And I've never shot a gun of any capacity, let alone a

airsoft gun. I was like, no, I'm good. I just, my family low key on Black Friday used to go every year after Thanksgiving to like blow off steam. Like mom's aunts, we're all playing paintball is sick. Then we stopped. I just got to stop. I don't know. I think the cold gun debate kind of got a little too. political and we just stopped like after like a couple of shooting it was kind of like is there an airsoft gun debate right now no like paintball like there's a there's a paintball gun that's even worse

well no it's more like it was more like should we be sponsoring like i don't know it just certain people the family thought that it was like i have a very both who give names who was anti paintball gun doxom lips. Well, I know that, but who? I'm not going to out my own family. I bet it was grandma. It just got a little around 2016, it kind of, you know, as many people's families, everything became politicized. So no more paintball. That was one of the reasons we were there to blow off. No more paintball. I remember I'm, you know, I'm pretty left. I've never heard anybody in my circles be like, we got to stop these paintball guns things too, because it's getting

out like, no, I've never even heard that before. So I think it was more just like, when I took your guns, Billy, big team. I feel about that. Well, they allowed, they took their own guns. First they allowed for the baseball guns and I said nothing. There was a lot of younger cousins and stuff. So it was just like a bad visual to have like kids running around like shooting stuff, especially in today's climate.

Yeah, that's sort of what was more. I would actually love to know if they've ever done studies because, like, at least when me, Ari and PFT were growing up, like, toy guns were still very much a thing. Yeah. How many of those kids grew up to be, like, bad people who were gunning people down on the streets? Like, I'm sure there is some overlap there just by the numbers.

But, like, that didn't ever inspire me to be like, yeah, this is what I want. Yeah, no, that's a good point. I used to play guns all the time. That was the go-to game. when I was a kid. Get a fake gun, pretend to shoot people. I think it's the fact that we don't play with guns enough makes it seem like taboo.

Yeah. Madeline, can you make a machine gun noise with your mouth? How did we get there? How did we get that? Girls can't make machine gun noises. I don't even know what? No, what the fuck is you talking about?

This is an advanced sexism. No, it's hilarious. No, this is like straight up five-year-old sexism right here. No, it's on TikTok. Wait, really, you make it first. You make it first. You can't make them either.

That's not a machine gun. She's been a way better machine gun than you. Whatever this bum-ass hypothesis was was just disproven, bro. If you ask girls, if you ask girls to make machine gun noise, they're like completely flabbergasted. I just was.

Hold on. My girl's in the room. Hold on. Hey, come real quick. Come here. Come here. Come here.

I won't put your face. I won't put the mic to you. All right. Come on a little little pep in your step now. All right. This is just a social experiment. Make a machine gun noise. That's pretty good.

Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty good. Billy just made this up. This is not a thought. Billy doesn't realize on TikToks is you can just That's a great gun, man. You're like, hey, pretend like you don't know how to make a machine gun noise.

Okay, everybody, everybody call a girl that you know and ask her to make a machine gun noise. This is going to be good. And in the meantime, I will, I will, I'll unscramble and re-scramble the Rubber's few. I'm going to call Kelly or booking and PR person here. I just talked to her a second ago, so I think that she's by her phone. Let's see. Actually, I don't even know what noise I'd make. Hello.

Hey, Kelly, you're on macrodosing right now. I have a question for you. Can you make a machine gun noise, like, with your voice? No, can you? Yeah, just try it. I don't even know what a machine gun sounds like. You have to be turning to really violence. Like, actually, I don't even know if that's the right.

Sorry, I have to pass it this time. Kelly, come on, just try. It's an experiment. doing. Should I just put on an episode of Breaking Bad and, like, just have you listen to the background? No, I just, just try. I can't. What does it sound like? I just did it. FFT also. I feel like that's pretty good. Hold on one. That's it. Okay. Why do you call me for this? Like, why didn't you call me to ask me like fashion questions or entertainment? Yeah, that's me. I've got so many questions about fashion.

I'm currently wearing everything that I'm wearing right now was given to me for free. So I don't, like, that's my fashion. Okay, ready? Yep. Wait, why isn't it funny? No, you have to, all right, bye, Kelly, I'm hanging up. All right, Billy was right.

Girls can't do machine gun voices. And that's not true. My girls just did one. I thought I did it. Yeah, the women asked were able to complete the task. okay so it was just something i saw on ticot i wanted to test it on air i wasn't a proponent of it you stated it as fact you did wholeheartedly no i said i all i said was hey mattie can you make a machine gun noise and then you guys all asserted that i was you know that this show is

recorded right billy like people can they've already heard you say i'm actually can't make machine gun noises well it's just a meme on ticot i'm just bringing it up because it's like prevalent to conversation. You dropped it as a fact, though. Like, we all heard you say, you did. Yes, Billy, you do this every episode where you say that, you say something. And then like five minutes later, you're like, I didn't say that. I hate this.

And then it has people on my mentions, fuck off, man, you build alone, man. I'm like, Brian, he'll be fucking up. I don't be doing nothing. We have such an amazing, unique audience. We do. we've been on that chat too recently I've been I've been loving interacting with people on that chat recently

I've had a good time with that I know that Billy's on there a little bit Aaron is on there sometimes I'll be on there lit I just I just put up my Christmas tree yesterday with all my kids and we painted ornaments and shit that was the most joyous shit I've ever done

yeah was it a real tree December 20th right I was fucking a hater bro I put up a tree big tea. This is my first treat. You're saying you're late in the game. Yeah, no. I put up a tree. Congratulations, Sarah. Glad you had a good time with your kids, dog. Like, nothing. Just with the foot, man. Why so lay on some Debbie Downers, bro. Fuck you off. It sounds like we're the, we're saying you're the Debbie Downer. Where were you? No, I'm fucking busy. I got shit going. I got this shit to do. But I did it with my kids. There was

Christmas songs playing in the background because I have the greatest Christmas players of all time. Anywho. I think that's nice, Aaron. Was it a real tree or fake tree? Fake tree. I'm not. Oh, fuck you. You got to get a real tree. It's not the same. You don't have the scent. You don't have the aroma. You don't have the needles falling everywhere. There's candles for that. And the second part, I'm cool with. I'm cool with not cleaning up needles. I've never had a real tree.

Man, this is sad. This is sad. You know how many Christmas tree salesmen and Christmas tree small businesses you guys are affecting by buying these reusable trees? You're going to cost to people jobs. No. I'm going to realize, have Christmas trees gotten canceled yet

just like for being environmentally unfriendly or something? I don't think they're environmentally unfriendly, though. I think that they're, anytime you're growing trees, that's a good thing. I feel like if anything, the plastic ones would be environmentally unfriendly. Yeah.

Yep, that's a fact. I'll tell you what sucks is getting rid of. of your Christmas tree if you're anything like me and you don't want to take it outside for the few days right after Christmas. It just sits around your house for a while.

And then what I used to do, I used to just like put it in my side yard for a little bit and then forget about it then. And then I realized two months later I had a dead Christmas tree that's just been in my side yard. So I used to just like take it to like a median somewhere and just like put it down on the ground.

Now it's the city's fault. Now they get to figure out dispose of it, not me. But I love a good real Christmas tree. It's a real Christmas tree or bust for me. You also have experience in the industry, though. Yeah, it's near and dear to my heart. You used to sell trees for a while. And, you know, those people, they're real people, too. They've got jobs. So support your local Christmas tree farm. Although in New York City, if you want to buy a real tree, it's highway robbery. It is honestly highway robbery here to purchase a tree. It is hundreds and hundreds of dollars to purchase a tree. How much is like, what's, like, what's

How much should you be paying for a tree? So it depends on where you're at in the country. But if it's a normal city that's not New York or a suburb, you're probably looking anywhere between 40 to 150 bucks. But in New York City, it's like 300 plus in Manhattan. My fake tree was $89 and it came with lights already on it. So it's like perfect. That's very nice.

It's also made out of cancerous plastic. So be careful. I'm going to eat it. I'm a real tree proponent, but I myself kind of got a fake tree this year. But it's a small one. So. For you, I didn't even get a tree. I didn't either.

There was too much traveling going on. I didn't really have time to go out and get it between that and COVID. I feel bad. I don't have a tree this year because I'm also going to go back to Virginia for Christmas. So there was not a lot of time that I would have it in my. my apartment. Usually I get a tree and I put it up, but it decorated that whole stuff. But this year, just too much traveling going on, wasn't able to get it, unfortunately. Wait, so now are you free? PFT? Are you technically ridded of the COVID?

I don't know. Well, I don't know how that works. So I tested negative yesterday, which is great. And then I went to go get tested again today. And the line was probably two hours long, so I wasn't able to get that test. I'm going to go again after this is over, try to get another test, and then I'll get tested again on Tuesday. And I think if I get those three in a row saying that I'm negative, I think that means I'm good to go.

Yeah, you can play tomorrow night in the Seahawks-Rams game if you test consecutively. Yeah, I don't, nobody knows, though, because they change the guidance all the time. It's impossible to figure out what you should be doing. That's what I've come to realize after going through it firsthand. And like what I had was, it was nothing. I was barely even sick.

just like tired at a sore throat. So I'm sure other people are going through it a lot worse. But having the perspective that I do now, figuring out all the rules and what I am and am not allowed to do and when I can go other places and all that shit, it's, we've done such a bad job, like just an all-time bad job as not even a country, as the world, figuring out how to get through this shit. So it looks like we're getting back into it again, just like we were in March 2020. Hopefully this one is going to be, you know, not as many people are dying or getting serious.

six, so that's good. But we have really made zero progress in figuring out how as a society to combat a deadly virus. Do they tell you what brand you have, or brand, what strain, strain you have? No, mine is even off the, it's technically off the books because I tested positive on rapid tests on Thursday morning. So consecutive back-to-back tests came back positive. I just went home and isolated at that point. I didn't feel like, because at that point the lines were along at testing centers too. So I didn't want to go wait in line for an hour around other people get tested with a PCR thing. I just, I, I saw the two positive results. I felt a little sick, so I just went home. I got Gucci COVID. Yeah, yeah, but I'm fine now. So glad to,

glad to have that behind us. But yeah, I'm not, I'm not very optimistic about how the next couple months are going to shake out. You didn't get boosted, obviously. I didn't get boosted. No, I don't know what the rules are behind that, too. I don't know if I can get boosted. You can get it for six months. No, you can get boosted as long as you don't have it current. I think there might be a waiting period. Don't quote me on it, but you should be able to get boosted maybe like a month or two

afterwards. I think it's like 90 days. I don't know. I don't know exactly the day. But even after you get it, you can still get a booster. Yeah, it's just really tough to figure out what these rules are. I yeah I'm trying to get a test because I I was in close proximity with PFT at one point and I kind of was feeling like a little weird over the weekend but like by the time I get a test

that might test negative you know what I'm saying yeah maybe I mean they have a test it won't hurt you if you've ever had you can get the antibody test right I think that generally tells you if you've had it in the last six months. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think that we're, we've made a whole lot of progress. I mean, the vaccine is good. And you know what I've realized recently in terms of vaccine coverage in the media is there, I think there are a lot fewer people that have turned down the vaccine than the way it's being covered. I think like a vast, vast majority of people are at least taking the first shot or maybe, you know, the first two shots. I think the whole hand ringing about it,

there's some people that I think a lot of people that are anti-vaccine are people that have still gotten the vaccine yeah the loud ones on TV yeah I agree with the people they're like interviewing in the streets no those people very much are for the cause uh of not not getting shot yeah I don't know what are the nationwide stats right now billy we off the top of your head vaccination rate mm-hmm I think it's around 75 yeah that see that's pretty good Well, it's when you look at 75 who got at least one, right? Yeah. So we are looking at, I'm Googling it right now, 77.3% of people 5 plus with at least one vaccination.

This is from the CDC. It says, yeah, 77.3% of people above the age of five. That seems very high. it's just like the one though is like is one even doing anything not that it's i'm telling people not to yeah i think the first one it's like when you're working out the first set is when you make most of your gains and then the second set you get like 20% of your gains right billy who's getting one who's getting the first dose and not the second dose is that happening a lot yeah yeah yeah j and j well not yeah i'm talking about two shot ones yeah people i know one person anecdotally

who got the first one, it took them out too bad, and they decided to not get the second one because of how sick the first one made them. So I'm sure there are some people at that line of thinking. I mean, we can't really say this has been like the most, I don't even know how you'd organize something like this on such a national scale, but like, it's a lot of personal responsibility to go back

and get that second one. Some people probably can't take work off. Some people probably can't, like some people have to travel long distances to even get it so like it hasn't been the easiest on the personal responsibility level and then also systemically like not the best do you think that this is going to kind of carry over moving forward once people that are maybe new to the anti-vax cause just through the COVID thing is that going to carry over for when they have kids they're not going to want to give them like the measles mom's rubella all that stuff that we

have been getting I actually don't think so I know because there's a lot because the anti-vacc movement, what used to be like way fringer until this came up, and it's more people who are against the new MRNA vaccine. The old vaccines they trust, a lot of them have gotten vaccinated, like, very. People were very outspoken for years about just the flu shot saying that that was commercialization trying to get you to buy stuff. But that wasn't as widespread as this anti-vacent. I agree anti-vaccin general wasn't super widespread because there was no reason for these people to have a spotlight on them as opposed to now when it's like the number one topic for a year and a half now.

But yeah, I don't see why these people would be okay with anything else now because like the reasons they're against it aren't science based. They're fear based of very irrational things like Bill Gates is trying to control us. Have you all seen the vaccines are using this to take their moment right now? I was watching a bowl game the other day. And there was an ad for the pneumococcal pneumonia of vaccine. They're really using all this news coverage to push all the other vaccines. Now, this is a whole thing from big bags. I don't think it's a bad thing.

And Brett and Charles doing singles vaccines commercials. Single vaccines. I just saw it. Are you single? I guess if ever there's a time to push your vaccine. It makes more sense. to me to push vaccines that way than it is like antidepressant medication, like that we have commercials for in this country and no other country. You know what I mean? Like, we've always had

medicine commercials for stuff that you have to ask your doctor for because you don't actually need them. But now it's like, you know, you probably, like, flu shot commercials probably make sense. All they really do to advertise them is put a sticker on the front door at CVS. Like, that doesn't feel like enough outreach to me. Yeah, but also the first time I remember seen a vaccine commercial yeah it's definitely funny like it's it's funny and not something we're used to but i i don't think it's a terrible idea there is the angle though that like people who take good care of their body and you know like exercise and like maintain health like there's no good angle for that that's the stupidest shit in the world that people you're still looking at it

through the lens of you. Bro, like, this is that Joe Rogan shit, bro. Like, fam, nobody argues, like, it's a straw man. Y'all are arguing straw man. Nobody argues that you personally probably would be okay if you got COVID. Nobody argues that. There's not a person that argues that. If they do, they don't know what they're talking about.

What they're arguing is you don't live by yourself. You live in New York City, a big-ass city, one of the biggest in the world. and you come across a lot of people and this is more contagious than the flu right it is a very contagious virus so their argument is it's not for you it's for other people right right yeah bill you're going to be fine if you get covered i think i had it over the weekend you don't just have it you don't just have a tired of touch of covid yeah yeah got this shit i mean my apartment my apartment's currently 54 degrees so i'm bundled up right now because no one's turning the heat on but I think like I was getting a couple chills over the weekend

because it's 54 degrees I know but I think I think I got COVID it wasn't the fact that the window open if you actually yeah if you actually think that you have COVID you should probably go to a doctor or get tested or something I've been like trying to get a test and there's like four hour lines and I have to do this podcast it can't be waiting a line it is crazy how long the line

How long the lines are now? That is that. They get an email from our company health care, which not everyone's on. I understand that. But they will send you two tests if you have our health insurance. Oh, how quickly? I ordered the, I got the email. I want to say Thursday, and they came yesterday.

That's pretty good. Yeah. Yeah, Billy, go get tested. just so you know and you're right if you get COVID you're probably you're probably going to be fine yeah I actually like all that stuff you're probably going to be okay but that's not I know but if I tested if I test positive for COVID after just like basically like not being able to help my friend move without like sweating profusely while walking up the stairs like dude I beat the shit out of this COVID yeah I got on the Peloton on on Saturday just to see what

what kind of stats I could put up while I had the cocoa. I last in three minutes. I was like, fuck this. I'm getting off. I don't need to be exercising. And then somebody DM me, an actual doctor DM me was like, hey man,

not to freak you out or anything, but strenuous exercise when you have a virus like COVID can actually be extremely detrimental. And it can lead to long-term side effects from it. So just lay on the couch. And I was like, okay, that scared me into just being a slob for the entire weekend.

Did you tweet that you were doing that? Or did he like see you on Peloton or something? A few people saw me because it puts out, like, people get a notification if they follow you. And so I think he got one of those. A couple people tweeted at me and they're like, hey, I see that you're working out right now. And they show me my stats. And I was like, yeah, that's pretty unimpressed because everyone can see your stats. And so it's this big 45 minute chunk of time with a line that shows how hard you're working.

And mine stops after three minutes. Wait, hold on. What is the peloton that people follow you on a bike? Yeah, it's like a, it's a bike that you have in your living room. And you get on it, you can compete against people live. So it's all connected to the internet. So you can take the same classes at the same time, see what your stats are. And it's got like a leaderboard on there.

It was good for the original kind of lockdown that we had here in New York where I wasn't really allowed to leave my apartment at all. I would get on that shit every day. And it was like a way that I managed to keep my mind sane. But yeah. So don't exercise if you've got the cocoa. Don't do it. I'm very disappointed that Aryan got a fake Christmas tree. That's something we'll have to discuss more behind closed doors.

But this is one of the worst things that you've ever done. And I was getting ready to applaud you for spending quality time with your family, too. I think that was nice. But what do you? I mean, why you saw against fake crowd. I don't understand. I was way more efficient. I used to sell Christmas trees.

And it was a big part of my life. And I know about that entire ecosystem of the farmers, the people that, the Cub Scouts that purchase the trees and sell them. Although I worked at an independent place, I wasn't one of those corporate Cub Scout kids. But there are a lot of people that deserve that, that, you know, they thrive on that time of year. They make money off their Christmas trees. So shout out to all the Christmas tree salesmen and farmers out there. Is there like a shortage of like, or is there like a, I don't know, is there, is there people out there that are hurting because people aren't buying realty?

Probably. Probably. Probably, yeah, the industry is shrinking because, you know, you go to your Walmart and now you can buy a fake Christmas tree at a big box store. Meanwhile, the people that put blood, sweat, and tears into creating these living things, cutting them down and bringing them to you. They're the ones that are affected by it. So I'm just taking a stand for the little guy out there. Arian likes corporations, not so much me. Yeah, I chalk this up to like technology, overtaking. the marketplace because it's more efficient it just is what it is man you got to you got to evolve with the times that's that sucks yeah i'll start a fake christmas tree farm you can go i have cut down your fire fake tree i have an unrelated bone to pick with aryan uh i noticed that i guess we could talk about this last week but i didn't see it till today you tweeted about a week ago abolished sheets can you elaborate on that please yeah okay so sheets are probably the most point of the shit in existence

right now. One of them. You're talking top sheet, right? Middle sheet. Yeah, middle underneath the blanket. You have a sheet on top? I thought we were talking to all sheets, but I'm a top sheet enthusiast also. So I'm curious to see No, no. So the bottom, so the one that covers the matches? That's necessary. That's necessary. That's smoothed it out. The one before the quilt

or the blanket, for what? And why? There's no point Unless hotels, I understand, right? It, it, you know, ups the probability of keeping the quilt a little cleaner. But other than that, and even that's a weak argument. This is not, I see no point. Just all quilt. If you have good sheets, that top sheet feels better than a comforter. No.

Not if you have a good comforter. Get a good comforter. I have very good sheets. I feel like I have a fine comforter. The sheet feels way better than the comfort. There's no. pragmatic use for sheets other than that's what you're used to and you feel like it also there's no pragmatic use for it in the summer I sleep with just a top sheet and no comfort because it's hot

I didn't know people did that that's crazy I do that sleep with just a sheet yeah it's hot for the comfort so don't sleep with anything on if it's hot I have to fall well I got to have something I can't I can't just raw dog it out here it's got to be something I'm on big tip that's a yeah you got Yeah, it's like, it's like the sensation of being under something. Being cozy. Yeah. Yeah, this is how y'all grew up. It's just a feel like.

It's a feeling. There's no pragmatic use for sheets. I agree that the middle sheet is usually unnecessary. I like to just go straight up comforter on top. And unless, like Aaron said, you're in a hotel. And then you get underneath that sheet because it's like really, really tight and tucked in. And then you just feel like you're in a little cocoon in the bed. I like that too.

but a lot of people just sleep on top of the quilt in the hotel, that's way dirtier. That's where all the bad shit is. If you think that you're in a bad place and you don't want to get into, you know, whatever sort of gunk is in that bed. The worst place is just sleeping on top of the quilt. You want to get underneath that sheet to give you a little bit of a buffer zone there.

But, yeah, I'm there. Sometimes in the summer I'll just go sheet. But, yeah, I think for the most part, middle sheets are, they're unnecessary. Oh, don't do you all have, like, an AC system in New York? That might be it. I have like when you put Then why in the summer are we sleeping with a sheet?

Yeah, my room's way closer in the side. Yeah, adjust your temperature. I don't understand. It doesn't work very well, but it's still hot. I'm poor. So mine's in like my living room. Like my windows are too small to fit an AC unit in here. So I have to let have it flow in.

That makes sense. What about a fan, like a regular fan? I'd have to get a really small one to fit in here. My room's really small. I have to occupy as much space as I can. Well, if you take the sheet out, that'll have some space. Yeah.

Yo, here's a, here's a dope thing that I had, this just came to my attention. There's a dude, Colie, I'm sure you've seen, I'm sure all y'all seen it. There's a dude named Hansel Emmanuel. My guy has one arm. Oh, yeah. And it's fucking nice at basketball.

like yeah fucking he got i think you hate hansel emmanuel yeah time out my jeet time out let me let me let me let me set the the let me let me set the stage before you get this fucking horrible take off uh so for the people that don't know hansel ammanuel is a guy look him up he's he's a he's a he's a basketball dude he only has one arm and he'd be cooking dudes i'm talking about crossing cats over shooting he got a d1 off i think it's at a hbc u like he's then if he had another arm he'd be a top chair recruit no good not even not even question i don't know if he'd be as good what are we talking about man listen he's talking about let me finish like this oh because it's not that you with this the second time you're going to roast my guy let me finish my thing is like my argument for

isaiah thomas the one who spelled the new one the little guy if he was six four he's not in the league that's a fact he's not a fact that's not a fact that's not a fact so the whole reason he's as good as he is because he's it's like nate robinson he's so mad at the world for being that short that that's what propels him to be great there's so many dudes who are six four and nice that just get overlooked because they don't stand out the whole fact that is that is that it stood out that is a variable that you are asserting it is not of course but i can't like he's even said like his height gives him an advantage which is crazy because he's so small This guy with one arm.

That's his optimism. His optimism says my height gives me an advantage. But it's also his determination, his focus. He's like, I get overlooked because of this. I have to work hard. Sure. If he was six, if he was six four, six five, who knows if he would have had another motivation?

That's the variable we're asserting. But based on the life that he had, that didn't exist. So if he was six, four, I just don't, like, he was the 60th pick already, even with all this talent. I don't think he would have selected. So it can be an advantage for him. him as an individual because the way that he personally has responded to it. Correct.

But if it was a true advantage, then the league would be filled with people who were 5-7, 5-8. Oh, boy. Yeah, I'm talking strictly on an individual level, just for him and one of one. Correct. Not everyone who's 5-9 is also as talented as he is, even if they may be, like, he's an extremely talented player. Hansel Emanuel, I just get so frustrated.

The reason I don't hate him as a person, I hate watching defenses on. force them left like you just got to force them left i know it's a shitty thing to say but i got a i got a clear disadvantage and no one seems to be taken they're not teaching defense arian at the new level is my real gripe here live who are calling you're afraid anti the one-armed guy it breaks my brain to watch bro you're you're phrasing of it needs to change as you said i said i said oh i hate this guy and i get so angry i get so angry everyone revolts up on internet i'm like what's happening We had a kid like this a couple of towns over when I was in high school, and he was cooking, cooking, and my coach called time out, and he was just like, fucking, I don't

want to say it, but for some left. And I was just like, he's not wrong, but force him fucking left. And this kid had more of an, like, Hansel Emanuel's got straight up no arm. This kid had like a half nub, kind of. So he could kind of bounce it, chicken wing it to his other hand. But this dude, this dude, I did not see. take from him coming. So at the age of six,

Emmanuel lost his left arm when a cinder block wall came down on him and trapped him for two hours. I thought he was born like that. That sucks. He went through trauma. Big time.

It's like James Franco. What's what happened? James Franco? 128 hours? Yeah. He played the rock climber. You remember that a rock climber dude that got stuck underneath the Boulder.

I think it was in Utah maybe. Yeah. And he had to cut his own arm off to survive. I don't know if I'd be able to do that. I love my arm too much. Dude, that's scary as hell. Yep. So before we get to Christmas, because now we've all transitioned to basketball,

Ariane. I'm listening. I feel like your whole sport took a huge out this weekend. My sport? Frank Gore. got his fucking lunch handed to him by Duran Williams. Yeah, I saw those highlights.

I did see that. That was tough. I mean, that looked on Frank Gore's face when he got hit and it was like, what? So I can't, I can't,

like, Frank Gore is a tough guy. I just looked like he don't got hands like that. I thought, you know what I said? And I, you know,

I know, I'm a met him, good, good dude. But Duran Williams, whatever his name is? Yeah. I'm a fucker was, he had the, he got hands like it is what it is like the better man won like now we got nothing to do

with the sport though doggie listen your boy your boy paul pierce tweeted out NBA 1 NFL 0 next i feel like you're going to fight paul pierce now okay i'm not y'all not gonna bait me into boxing you know what i'm saying like so you have good hands so i got great hands um and i'm extremely confident that i'll whoop a lot of niggis but the issue is i'm way too old to be boxing niggas for money and I'm way too rich for that. So, like, there's no amount of money that's going to get me in the ring with Paul Pearce.

There's no amount of money. You don't believe in money, though. That's what I'm telling you. There's no amount of money that's going to get me in the ring to box another grown man in front of a bunch of strangers. $500,000. No, for what? I'm a way too low.

I'm going to run on Ricky Waters' that shit. For who? For what? I already have CT. I'm going to get more of it. Fuck that shit. Hell no. But that's just like,

goes to show how much reach is important in box. Like, why to Paul is just like literally winning fights with guys who are like four or five inches shorter than him and looking sick. Which is also why Mike Tyson was such a fucking legend.

Would warp dudes with a longer reach. Well, you got to be crazy to win fights within that small because you have to get, you have to get within a certain closeness of them. So there's a big danger zone that you have when they've got the advantage but once you get inside that reach then you can beat the shit out of somebody that's got a

bigger reach than you but it's a problem of one getting in and two getting out after you've you know delivered a couple blows when you're face to face with a guy because you have to be able to get out of that danger zone uh without getting hit again so it's it's really really tough and that takes a lifetime of training that takes mike Tyson being 13 up in this cat skills that's where you learn that you can't just like be frame gore and learn that with like Someone said Frank Gore looks like he's learning about a beef Duran Williams has with him that he doesn't know of that. That's what it looked like.

Like Duran Williams was taking its day out on Frank. And see, that's what kind of like blew me was. And I know that Duran Williams has fought before, right, either professionally or unprofessionally, but he's definitely trained a little bit. But he took, he took, and I didn't watch the whole fight. I just saw the highlights. But from the highlights that I saw,

he was just aggressive. And, like, that's how you, if you fight in somebody, it's a fight. And Frank Gore looked like he was boxing when Duran looked like he was fighting. And, like, there's a big difference. And it showed. I mean, when he pushed him up against the ropes, I got a hype, but I was like, damn, that's the homie. It is what it is.

Yep. Yeah. And, Billy, to your point, Jake Paul, I think, is actually just a good boxer. I don't think that you can, you can blame it on the fact that he's got reach on these guys. I think he's just a good. If you saw the knockout that he had on Woodley, he faked like he was going down to the left. And, well, so he, on the knockout punch,

it was that big right. But before that, he set it up, faking down to the other side, to the ribs. And Woodley dropped his arm from his face and left his face exposed to block that body shot. Paul saw that. And then like two seconds later, fake to the other side, saw him drop that arm and then came across the top.

Like he felt that out. The guy can actually box. Or, you can actually part. they had a coordinated plan and he was yeah hang on so i i truly despise this like celebrity boxing fad we're going through right now i think it's the dumbest shit in the world do you do y'all believe that jake paul actually knocked that guy out yes yeah uh yes he hit him he hit him so hard right behind the ear lights out immediately i believe he hit him i don't think it was like no i'm not saying it was we all saw the punch i'm saying

that was the plan right no are you saying are you saying it's a conspiracy and is set up i don't even think it's a conspiracy it seems fairly obvious to me that like the money they're raking in from all these it benefits them to have jake paul keep winning and they're the they're paying you know woodley and whoever else is doing it decent much good enough money like yeah fuck it i'll go get punched in the face for however much money you're going to give me so what the premise is on saying it's stage is that before you hit him with that punch jake paul's curling his wrist, like almost what people are saying was the signal for the K.O. Punch coming.

And that's what they're saying is. And by people, Billy means one TikTok he saw it because I also saw it. Well, there was three TikToks. So triple confirmed. Yeah, multiple sources. It was right after. Multiple sources. By the way, I'm not, okay, so when I put these things out, I'm just saying what's out there.

I'm not siding with them, but I'm trying to. Not always. Many people are saying sometimes you agree with them. I do not like, I just think it's funny and I'm bringing it up for the sake of the podcast because it's good, you know, content. Is it possible that during a fight somebody was moving their wrist around because they've been using their fist to punch somebody repeatedly? No.

Yes, of course, 100%. Okay, I think that's probably more likely. But that's what people were talking about with the stage. They're saying that Paul, you know, moved his wrist. in a certain way to signal that the big overhand right was coming to drop. Now, look, it's very hard to actually put on, like, scripted fights. So the fact that they put on such a, if they did fake it, that they put on such a show is quite impressive.

How much time did you spend rehearsing before you fought with Jose could take up, Billy? So, actually, it's a fourth amount of time because as you saw, it lasted. So I'm actually so, like, looking back on that, I was so, like, mentally just like shitting myself the weeks up towards the fight like honestly i would have not trained it hard at all if i knew that he like literally was not physically able to be in the ring like he had a 60 year old man you beat up wasn't in shape to fight okay like when you're in that moment you're not really thinking about mercy or any of that like yeah i know you hit him when he was on the ground people don't talk about that enough bill just went up to him and he was on like both knees

And Billy just stuck him in his jaw. Jesus. It was kind of like, it was, yeah, well, sorry, in that mode, I was like in survival, like, you know, make sure it's like survival. This was the guy earlier this episode who was going to be like mid-robbery breaking down what kind of gun the robber was holding. And now he's like hitting the old man on the ground for survival. Dude, I couldn't died in there.

People don't give me enough credit for. for like just like going through with that. Everyone just sees the fight. They're like, oh. What do you mean you could have died? Wasn't his blood pressure like fucking 200 or something shit? I could have gotten killed by the 270 pound roided up freak that I was fighting. A 60 year old.

Dude, I was shitting my pants. He was like. You're, there no way we're use your life endangered though. That's the 87 MVP you're talking about. I was terrified. I was literally the weeks coming up to the fight. I, like, was waking up in the middle of the night and cold sweats.

Was there ever? Could a guy had a COVID. That's because you had COVID. Billy literally had COVID. So that, I don't know. But, like, I was terrified. It was literally scared. Did you genuinely think, like, that whole time?

Again, I've never had a trade for a fight, so I don't know what your mindset is. Like, did you just constantly have to think, like, I'm going to win, I'm going to win, I'm going to win. Or was there back in mind? Like, holy shit, I might get the shit knocked out of me by Jose can say. Yeah, no, 100%. You should have heard the interviews he did with like Caleb, where he was like, I have like, you know, really good hand-eye coordination.

Like, my hand-eye coordination is so good because I'm like such a great baseball player. Like the same way I used to hit baseballs a thousand feet is the same way you connect on punches. So I'm going to make Billy's head a home run and hit it. And I'm just like in my head, like in my fucking brain, how I think of like sports and stuff, that made so much sense to me. I was like, it has amazing hand-eye coordination. So like if I'm moving my head and he knows I want to hit, like, like 100 mile power of fastballs.

He's definitely going to like fuck me up. I'm dead and he has the power. That boy. That boy psyched you to fuck out. He was like, I was going in there. I was like in order like I had to like change my whole person like mental persona to like get myself the point to get in there with that guy.

What was you telling you telling yourself about him to make you hate him? Dude, I was literally it was like it. I can't even get back to that mental, like, just like, imagine just a month of just super high intensity, like high stress, like, like, if anything, I was having like a, I snapped in the ring. But yeah, what I'm hearing here is you're very lucky he wasn't physically able to fight because it sounds like he had the beat on you. No, it was very possible. I got in there and he could have like easily beat the shit out of me like I was ready I trained

but like who knows like I didn't he'd been in a professional fight before I had like I said I don't think I've seen this shit on YouTube right yeah I'm gonna watch it real quick it's a quick watch yeah yeah you go like R&R Billy football versus Jose Kinsego should pop up I mean it's like low key sometimes I have nightmares I'm in the ring with Jose Konseko and like you know when you're in dreams and you can't really punch or scream yeah i hate that yeah it's like you're like you're like trying to punch but you can't like then jose can say goes just beating the shit out of you and you can't punch back that's i sometimes have those dudes look i'm just saying like it was kind of like you know traumatizing it's very we're glad that you're live billy saying so christmas

let's talk about it let's talk about all the weird fucked up christmas traditions that might exist outside the American mainstream right now, because there's a lot of them. A lot of Christmas traditions out there. I love the old school European ones, the ones that make it sound like Christmas is actually an evil holiday. Those are my favorites. I was actually playing Call of Duty this weekend, and they installed this new element to it called Crampus. Cranpus, is anybody doing Crampus? Is there a person? Yeah, I was going to bring it up specifically because of college duty. Yes.

A group crampus talk. Yeah. So, Billy, you did some research on crampus? So crampus is basically, you know, the, let's just say Santa is representative, God and Jesus. Like, crampus is like the devil. Crampus is like Santa's like arch nemesis. It's like comes from old like, you know, like yodel, like places where people yodel and shit. like Bavaria, like Austria, Germany.

That's where Crampus is fucking from. Crampus is this dude who like is supposed to scare. He's like, you know, if Santa's like, Santa's the carrot, crampus is the whip for children. Like the idea that if you're good, you'll get stuff. But if you're bad, crampus, this goat-footed, gigantic, hairy horn beast is going to come and fuck you up and, like, steal you away in the middle of the night.

but a lot i some stuff that's really cool about like a lot of christian traditions is that they have these like pre uh christian like pagan roots in like like imagine europe before christian like just some wild ass fucking place where people believe that there's like gigantic goat demons run around yeah so it that just tells me that that parents in general positive reinforcement will only last so long for them before they're like, these kids are driving me insane. I need to come up with someone that will scare them to make them behave. Because it's not just enough to be like, if you behave well, I'm going to give you presence. I need the threat looming in the background of if you fuck up, you're going to die. And so like you leave cookies

out for Santa. You're supposed to leave out schnapps for crampen. Like, you better give this motherfucker booze. So my faith, so crampus is also, um, When I first learned about crampus, it turns out there's a lot of imagery of crampus sort of chasing after, as it's said here, basically like women. Like, crampus is an OG, like, like, reepy dude. Yeah, I might be team crampus, like the dude that just the hairy goat guy that just shows up and gets drunk off your booze. I like that. He's ridiculously horny. really yeah so let me let me find the exact place is there crampus porn out there i bet you that

there is crampus porn there in gul 39 let me find this we'll get back to christmas stuff in a second but before we do remind you guys about three chi three chi three chee three chee i'm not a drug guy but i am a three chee guy go to three chee dot com that's the number three c h i to shop for delta eight vapes gummies and tinctures you can make your own homemade edibles if you use promo code macro. You get 5% off your order at checkout. Promocode macro. Three Chi is the industry leader in Delta 8 THC products. All their products are formulated by biochemists. They're made right here in the USA with USA grown hemp. Their Delta 8 is a federally legal version of THC. It's a more functional alternative to marijuana. You get an amazing buzz, good body feel, but you get a clear

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Go to 3Chi.com, get some vapes, gummies, tinctures, oils, make homemade edibles. You use promo code macro at checkout. Get 5% off your order at 3Chi.com. Like he's depicting, like, harassing women. It's like terrible. But it's like this dude comes to your town, you know, scares all the children, like, chases all the women and he's crampus and he comes every year so there used to be back in uh in puritan england they would do the 12 days of christmas but it was a lot different from how you think

of it today it was just basically all the working class people would take 12 days off work and get fucked up just drink all the liquor that they could find and then they'd show up and you know that song where it's like bring us some figgy pudding we won't leave until we get some they would actually show up at rich people's doors and demand that they feed them pudding and if they didn't feed them pudding they would break into their house they would light it on fire there were genuinely it was it was riots it was just 12 days of people getting fucked up every year and they had to cancel Christmas for a while because people couldn't handle it they couldn't handle the big celebration that it was like Mardi Gras every year I kind of I would like to see that

so make the pudding like you don't have to cancel it just be prepared you know they're coming and you know their demand crampus crampus it's called uh crampus noctin so on december 5th is st nicholas's day turns out there's a bunch of like christmas holidays that aren't christmas that are celebrated on different days of the year like so there's uh saint uh st nicholas day and then there's uh three kings day which is not like january 5th which other You celebrate Three Kings Day? I celebrate the next day. It's December 5th or 6th.

Yeah. So that's like, so December 6th is when crampus comes to town. And it's the day after they usually would give like gifts in certain days. And then it was crampus night. Basically it was crampus night. So crampus would come to your town, fuck some shit up, like drink all your schnapps, chase be an absolute rapy dude and scare all the children so is crampus like an evil counterpart to santa or is it in replacement of santa evil counterpart to santa so in this in this

universe where crampus exists santa exists but if you fuck up so bad crampus is going to come get you exactly that's like what's the Dwight in the office what's his name when he's like the evil Santa that's that's what that's big T's think bell schnickle yeah that's like what that's reminding me of

all I know is that cramp is in call duty absolutely sucks right when you're about to get a win he just shows up and you have to just fight him off or run from him and waste all your ammo on him and it ruins the entire game One thing I've noticed with God, Cranp is if you're running and you see him attacking someone else, if you kill the guy he's attacking, then you think Cranfus would be like,

thank you for the help. No, no, he turns all of his anger to you and just murders you immediately. It's the dumbest thing they've ever done in that game. And they've done a lot of dumb shit. Yeah. I feel like the developers for that game sometimes are just, they sit around just trying to think of ways to piss you off as a gamer just to be like they're really going to hate this one i feel like what's those games is called duty well see that's the thing though like i would think about if you have

a game right and it's like distributed worldwide and you have you can that you have to but you can update it right to acquiesce to your community's demand there's going to be and no matter what you do there's a section of your community that's like what the fuck are they doing no matter what you do And so it's like, it's a tough predicament to be and like to have such a popular game. Yeah, but I do think that they purposely try to make people mad. They're like, they're going to hate this.

It's going to be so funny. That'd be fucking dope, actually. It sounds like something that in the ideas meeting, like brainstorm they had, someone brought it up. They were like, this is sick. But in the execution part, didn't work as well. Say hi to your daughter first, Erin. Can you say hi?

Hello. Can she make a machine gun sound? Say hi. Can you, can you make a machine gun sound? Hi. Can you go, go. Good, good. Don't do things on demand.

You don't want to. I like it. I love it. I actually don't think she, I don't think she's heard of a machine gun, actually. That's good. That's good. Are you going to say bye?

Say bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Cuteest little fuck. I can never tell her no either. I bought the dumbest toy yesterday just because she was looking at me. She had little feet crossed looking up at me like this at the story or something. I was like, fuck.

All I get it. Shit. How does she feel about Santa? All my kids. Hold on all my kids. So one of my daughters is 12. Oh, wait. Yeah, I think we talked about this last week, actually.

She's always been smart, right? She's always like figured it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm glad you stopped me. Thank you. Because I have CTE. So like, I'll go into explaining shit and people will be like, they'll listen to the whole story and they'll be like, yeah, you told me that already.

I'm like, what the fuck are you? Tell me at the beginning. Stop me at the beginning. Again, thank you, man. I appreciate that. Is that something that you think about sometimes? Like, if you have a small lapse in memory, you are like, oh, shit, maybe I have CTE. Oh, yeah.

I'm very aware I have CTE. It's not the memory that's worrisome to me. Well, I take it back. The memory is worrisome, but the where did I put my key shit, I don't care about that shit. It's the, so like the other day I was driving. There's two things that really worried me. The other day I was driving.

and it's the same road I go home to every single day, right? It's a highway. And I live right off the highway. And I was driving and there was like for 10 seconds, I had no fucking clue where I was and it was scary as hell. I was looking around like, I don't recognize anything, any building, any trees, no landmarks. And I'm very like, I have a photographic memory. So like I'll go to a city one time and I can tell what direction I'm going.

just by the landmarks. And so I was driving. I was like, and it was like an out-of-body experience where I was like, I was scared as fuck. I was like, I don't know where I am.

I have no fucking clue where I am. And the, what was scary was, I knew I knew where I was supposed to know where I was. And I didn't know where I was. And then all of a sudden, like I snapped out of it. I was like,

okay, I'm here. And that was scary as fuck. The other thing that's really scary is I'll go through bouts of like, obviously like depression, but I'll go through bouts of like, I'm very aware of it. So it's not,

it's not depression in the sense of like something happens and I'm sad, so it's not, I'm not reacting to anything. It's like a chemical thing that I can recognize to where it's like there isn't a single thing. There's all morbid now, but there's not a single thing that could bring me happiness or joy.

And that sounds really like morbid, but it's the truth where it's like there's nothing, there's no show, there's no TV, there's no, my kids, my family, there's nothing that can bring me joy. And it'll be like, it'll last for a certain amount of time and I can recognize when it's over. And so those kind of things I'm very aware of like, okay, this is what I'm lucky in a sense is like, for now anyway, that I can recognize it. I know a lot of cats who don't know what they're going through. And so they like take it out on them people or there's aggression.

There's different kind of things. And it's just sucks, but like this is what we deal with. Like if you have this, it's degenerative brain disease is what it is. But if you have it, I just recognize it simply because I'm very well. I've always been aware of self. And so I'm sure there's shit that I do that I'm unaware of, but I try to be very cognizant of it, especially the people around me,

because I always joke about having CT and they hate this shit. But it's because I want them to know, like, if there's something going on with me that I don't know, like you need to tell me I'm not above approach so that we can be proactive about it so that I'm not like often people. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Is there, have you had any communication with the NFL or health services that have given you any indication that we're getting, close to get a test on people who are still live? I've heard that they're getting close. They don't, nobody reaches out to me. They have like this thing through the NFLPA, but I don't really fuck with the NFLPA

because I just think they're in bed with the owners. And so I've just never, I've always kept my distance for them, even when I was in the NFL, I didn't pay my dues. There was a, there was a, I think there was somebody was doing a study. I think it was John Hopkins, maybe. They contacted me because they wanted to do like wouldn't be a part of the study. And I was initially all four

because I'm super pro science. But they gave me the flight information to fly me out. And it was the economy. And I was like, can y'all above it to first class? And it was like, no, we can't do that. I was like, why ain't going? Really boozy, but I can't sit in the,

I think there's two things I'm really boozy about. I cannot sit in the economy. I'm my back for that long. I'm not sitting in the economy. I can't do it So I decided not be a part of the study What's the other thing

that you're boogey about? I had it. T.T.E. kicking in. Not necessarily. I'm not going to do a motel for sure unless it's the only thing. So I'm not really boogey about it. It's just like if I have options, I'll like to have options. But like I will not get on a flight unless it's first class.

I think the other thing is I think of it. How much does the wine you usually drink cost? That could be, it's pretty good. Well, I like for Thanksgiving, I had an opus wine. That's like a $700 bottle of wine. But it's not I don't have to drink that kind of wine. I usually stay around the, I stay around the, you know, $18 to $40 range.

You know, I'm not too picky. I got my, yeah, I'm not too picky. So in the same vein of, you know, mental health and whatnot, there was a new study that just got released. I know this sounds like, for a fan, fran, new study just dropped recently. Compass Pathways, which is a psychedelic, he's trying to use, you know, psilocybin psychedelic to help with mental health issues. They just did the largest, a widespread study. and it was super positive. I think it was like 90% of people who participate in the study found improvement after

using certain dosages of psilocybin. But the only reason that they there's been like, because the stock kind of dropped after the study released, but that was because three people who might have been in the placebo group displayed self-harm, three people out of thousands. thousands so that news for some reason made the stock price not but it was actually very positive in that vein of helping people with mental health trauma so i mean you know i got a buddy um i got a buddy Kenny steals who uh i think he plays with a saint still maybe but um he um he got really into psilocybin and and and its effects on people with like depression and shit like that

and he's a super advocate for it he's been doing a lot of work with the people that that are studying it. And from either personal experience or secondhand experience, people that tell me about it, that is the best help with depression than any antidepressants they've ever had is when you microdose psilocyber. I think it's the future of mental health, but it's just an anecdote. And it's still, I think it's still a schedule one, which is why they can't do like mass research studies on it and a lot of places i think it's legal i think organ it's legal maybe another a couple of other states but it's still a schedule one drug which is fucking bananas and as soon as we get these old motherfuckers out of congress then we can make real progress

in that field but until then um we're going to just keep lining their pockets do you think do you think that the future of cTE treatment might be in microdosing psilocybin or absolutely psychedelics I think I think any degenerative brain

disease any brain disease we're talking about you know pain alleviation we're talking about mental

any kind of mental health issue I don't because from my research what it does is actually connects neurons that aren't there

normally and it's just training the brain to use that right and I'm not a fucking neuroscientist but just from what I've seen and what I've felt, it's way better.

I don't take a lot of medicine. I just don't take a lot of medicine, like antibiotics or anything like that, just because I feel like if I need it during the time, it'll be more potent than just taking it casually. And so I think, but my experience with psilocybin in general has just been nothing but positive, like nothing but positive, except I had one bad trip, but I took way too much and I was in a good environment. Yeah, so that study came out in mid-November, 2021.

So it's quite recent, but it was the largest one they ever did. So there is hope for all that. I'm praying for it. Pray for me, Big T. We'll do. Do you pray for people? Yeah. Did you pray for me when I had COVID? I put up, like, I hope PFT is doing well.

That's a hope. That's not a prayer. You sent God a text. It bends off the full prayer. Sounds like you just, you ask the air. You asked just the universe to help me. You didn't ask the man. When I heard, when I heard that you had COVID, I was like, wow, I really hope PFT's okay.

I hope Lord helps you through that. And it's like you're doing great. I've been saying I don't want thoughts and prayers. I just want prayers. Thoughts are meaningless. I'm thinking about you. Okay. That's fine.

Yeah. If you acknowledge that prayers aren't meaningless. Prayers are not meaningless. Do you ever pray anyone's downfalls? Speak to you. Oh, yeah. It's one of the few things that motivates me in this world.

Do you actually pray if it was downfalls? I mean, do I sit down at night and pray to Jesus Christ to make people fail? No. When the people that I hate fail, does it I was at I was at a place

the other day and next to me was a guy who I hated and hated me in high school and he has utterly failed in life

he sucks he's a loser and I didn't say word to him he didn't say word to me but I know he saw me and like he knows that I know

that I have lapped him like many times in life and that made me that made my day so you don't pray for that to happen but you do thank god when it does happen yeah that that's that's an accurate way to put it wouldn't the christian thing to do be to forgive um i do forgive i don't forget okay all right which is almost worse i like it sounds like it's not a real forgiveness then no no i'll forgive you but i i absolutely will not forget so what does forgiveness mean um like i i i would say i harbor no ill will but i absolutely do um i don't think i don't know

i don't know i don't i just when when the people that i hate fail it it fills me with a joy that nothing else does it truly does that's what brother that is fucking evil though what i have two motivations in life money and people that i hate knowing that i've won i think i i I think you should reread Jesus' words, my guy. Like, I really think, you know, you know, you have some important chapters. Double back on what the homie said, because that ain't it. I'm aware. I'm just, I'm shooting it to you straight. That's, that's the way it is.

Dan, I love it when Christians aren't Christlake. Well, that's, that's why I need Jesus. Do you think that Jesus, you think Jesus would, like, watch, you know, the people that captured him, arrested him, killed him. Much better person than I. And be like, I hope those motherfuckers die. No, that's why he's where I am and I'm, I'm chilling here. I saw, I saw Pontch's pilot at a bar and, you know, many, many years later.

And I, he knew that I knew that I laughed him in life. He does, though. I mean, look where we're at. Jesus is one. Sure. Sure. Jesus won. But like, Jesus don't care if he won. Jesus wants everybody to win.

That's fair. Mm-hmm. Yeah, his birthday, he gets three shit gifts. I've gotten so many better gifts for Jesus' birthday than Jesus ever got. His gifts suck. Yeah, he can no N64. Frankencents. Merv's pretty good. Gold was gold.

Gold is good. Wasn't Frankencence super valuable then, though? Yeah, but what are you going to do with the? much of frankincense. I don't know. I don't even know what it is. I think it's a herb. I actually have some.

Why? Of course. I've been getting into, like, what's it called? Frankenstein. Yeah. Like burning? Like, um.

Arson? Sense? I've been getting into like arson then. I've been lighting how fires around. Tom. Traumatic resin incense. We don't talk enough

about how arson is like a key indicator of somebody becoming a serial killer. That's one of the first things that they do is they just, they get fascinated by fire. Isn't that crazy?

And killing it. Yeah. Yeah, I heard the animal one for sure. Where's there? I didn't hear the fire thing. I got Arabian musk. I got lavender. Lavender.

Lavender's sick. Yeah. I have lavender my essential oil diffuser right now. Matter of fact, I'm about to burn his candle right now. I like candles for sure. Meditation. I have frankincense. Frankencence doesn't actually smell that good.

It kind of smells like church. I had to carry the, I was one of the three wise men. I think it was sixth grade. And I had to carry the frankincense. That terrible smell. Awful. I hate the smell of incense in church. It makes me, like, choke up and make me feel.

like I can't breathe. So when I go to like Christmas Eve Mass, there's like 10 minutes where I'm down for the count. Sounds like some bad instance. Yeah. Billy, I have some more questions about crampus. Is crampus still acknowledged? Is he still a part of Christmas traditions in Bavaria to this day?

Yep. They do to dress up like crampus and they run through the town. That's it. We should do crampus con. Yeah. Yeah. What is also? Is it for spreader?

event? Yes. It would be Kampas con, the alt Honestly, during Santa Con dressing up as Kampas would be the I mean, Kampas is a terrible person.

A massive red flag, yeah. Yeah. Yo, what are you dressed as? I'm Kampas, bro. Yeah, I like that. I mean, Kampus seems like he's badass. He's metal as hell.

And we don't have, we don't have a, like a Kampus, equivalent here in the United States. It's just all Santa stuff. I guess the elf on the shelf adds in that little threat where it's like you're always being watched so don't fuck up.

But there's no one who actually punishes you on Christmas. Elf on the shelf is part of the reason we're in these lockdowns right now. We're teaching our children compliance. Big Brother's watching you. You better be good. Do what the government says. Do what the government says. Let's take it a step further there, Big T.

I'm fucking with you. religion as well teaches compliance do what God says or else there's hell talk to me I don't think you're necessarily on the wrong

it's like let's put the right here we need some moral no no no that's different than the government that's an institution you're choosing to belong to now choosing to believe

it's been it's been thrust we talked about a woman who thrusts it on a lot people. It's been for religion's been forced upon people. Yes, but in this country currently, like, you don't have to belong to a church if you don't want to. Do whatever you want. If you're, if you're choosing to go to church, it's because you most of the time, like earnestly believe what they're teaching and what they want. What we're in right now is just like do what we say

or else. Well, see, I would, I would argue with you. I will concede the point that you have a choice in this country, right? But what I think is, if we're drawing similarities, would you not agree that religion is very much forced on children, especially in southern communities and a lot of communities in general? And if you're not really, there's no, you don't have a choice as a child. You're told that there's a God. Like, I would be interested if we never told children that there was a god how many of them would develop that on their own it'd be i don't think everything is forced on you when you're a child like eating vegetables is forced on you or you wouldn't do it like that's that's my point well yeah that's my point you have to force everything on children

i agree okay you don't have to force religion on them right but no if you go to church like obviously you can't just leave your kids at home for sure yeah that's quite a pickle I have thought for a long time if it was illegal and I don't know how you'd go about making this a lot but if it was illegal to tell to teach kids or tell them about religion until they were 18

how many would embrace it I think it'd be more than you think but I do think it would be interesting because I do think what Ariens saying like yeah it is true like people go to church mostly because they just grew up with it and it was I have a take I think it might be more than it is now

hell no I think there are a lot I think there are a lot of people who go to church as kids and like don't like it and they're like this is something I have to do and then when they become adults they don't do it and they don't care

and I think there would be a lot of people who wouldn't have a predisposed annoyance at it for 18 years that if you that if that was the case I think more people would be religious as adults than all our I somewhat agree.

I don't think so. This is why I disagree. I disagree because I don't think it's the tenets of religion that people get, like, utility out of. I think if you replace religion with other social institutions, like if mental health was a priority in your teen years or your preteen years, and you knew how to cope with social issues early on, You wouldn't need a source of, or like, you know. Sense of belonging. Yeah, not necessarily sense of belonging, but you wouldn't, you wouldn't use it. Religion as like a coping mechanism for your, for your, your, your ills and your struggles.

Because you would understand or at least know how to go get help from it. So you wouldn't rely on a Jesus. That's why, like, it was always ironic when you talk to like, as an atheist, like when you talk to Christians or just religious people in general, They're like, the devil wants you to, Jesus wants you to turn towards him. The devil wants you to turn towards yourself. And we're like, yeah, absolutely. So like we're saying be more accountable for your, for your issues, be more accountable for your community.

That way we can help solve all these problems together rather than turning to a divine cause for it. And so what I, I think that if we implement those tools at a younger age and prioritize it rather than prioritize it entertainment and money making, then you would have a much more healthy, mentally healthy society, and they'll be able to cope with their problems and be more accepting of other people's problems and more understanding, in my opinion. Well, it's interesting because that's the reason I believe more people would seek it out, because I don't think we would implement those tools.

So I guess I was working under how society currently works and probably Big T too. I think that's why more people would flock to it. But yeah, if people, if we were better about that, yeah, I don't think people would search for that community and that those, uh, tenants, uh, from a place that's teaching them. Yeah. I used to think, so I was like, I used to be a militant atheist where I was like, I would challenge anybody and anything. But like, I saw it. So when people used to be, and a lot of them still do it. Like a lot of like Christians, like if you get into any kind of skiszy with them, though, oh, I'm going to pray for you. And it's really, it's a, it's a pejorative, right?

They're doing it to like, it's like them talking shit. But I used to, I used to, I used to I think all the time when people say, like, I'm going to pray for you. It was like, don't pray for me, right? Or I used to say, I used to be real ass or they would say, I'm going to pray for you. I was like, well, I'll think for you, right? It was really stupid. Now I'm much more empathetic towards religion as a whole. And so, like, when people tell me they're going to pray for me now, I really enjoy it.

It's just their way of saying, like, I obviously don't believe what they believe, but it's their way of extending like an olive branch emotionally and what they would call spiritually my way. And I appreciate that. That's pretty dope. growth in my yeah um

big tea I want to hear about belchnicle so belshnichl is not entirely dissimilar from crampus but like less evil intention so belshnichel uh came from the German people

like the Pennsylvania Dutch it's actually kind of a it is a European thing but it's been a tradition in the United States too So Belchnickle is this guy, if anybody's seen the office, you've seen Dwight dresses Belchnickle and he goes into the office and does the impish or admirable deal with everybody. So Belchnickle looks kind of like a guy from Appalachia who's just been in the mountains

for a while. And he goes around with, he has treats and he also has sticks that he uses as a whip. And the kids, if they've been good, they get treats. if they've been bad they get wet but he doesn't he doesn't have bad intentions though he wants to give everybody the treats but sometimes you just got to do what you got to do now also though

I read that Bell Schnickle would sometimes throw like all the treats on the floor but if any of the kids were too eager or selfish and like they got too many treats or something then they also got whipped so you've got to be real careful around Belchnickle that like you're really on the up and up he was playing bull on the floor

were the kids. Yeah, I haven't seen that show, so I don't know what that is, but I know vaguely what you're talking about. Yeah. That's exactly what it is. What is bore on the floor? In succession, the guy Logan Roy, the patriarch of the Roy family, he's trying to figure out who he's going to name like next in line to his company. He's got a bunch of shithead kids and all the hangers on around him. And so he makes him get down on the ground and play a game he just made up called Boar on the floor,

which is them crawling around on their hands. and knees while he throws bore sausages at them just to make him feel good about himself. Just to degrade them because much like Big T, the thing that he lives for is seeing all of his enemies fail and humiliating others to make himself feel good. So he's just throwing sausages at him repeatedly and calling the game bore on the floor and seeing how all these very, very rich, powerful people will just bend the knee for him at any given time. All right. Yeah. So Bell Shigel, he can be mean. but he wants to be nice.

Like his intentions are good. He wants everybody to get treats. Okay. It's just like not everybody can't get treats, you know. So is it actually, is it something that's celebrated in Germany? Or is it just strictly in the United States? I think now it's mostly like a Pennsylvania Dutch thing,

but it came from Europe. Hmm. So I don't know how much it's still done in Europe. And then he's got a friend, right, Big Tea? Well, no, no, no. So I watched a video from a year ago of a guy, a bell shnickle in the Lehigh, something. And he says they don't do that. That was fake news from the office.

That's like a very fringe thing. But it is a real thing. I think somewhere, yes, that's a real thing. But he said that's not mainstream. Got it. Do you want to explain what that is or should I? You can explain it. He's got a buddy.

His buddy's problematic. He's ever, you know. Yes, he does have a buddy. And his buddy is named, it's, I don't have it in front of me right now. It's, was it black, what? Black Pete. Black Pete. Yeah, so Black Pete is Belchnichael's like sidekick that he has, which is just a guy that gets dressed up and it's just straight up black face.

He just, he just wears black face. And he puts on a curly wig and he rolls around. Nicholns-Nichael says that that's that's fringe okay it's got a full wikipedia page for him though yeah it's very no yeah no he exists it's kind of funny how there's this like whole cast of characters behind santa claus that we don't really talk about that much it's like the hamburgler to ronald and like all the other characters that's a really good way of describing it as the hamburgler yeah like crampus is the hamburger yeah every every superhero needs a rival right yeah it's actually crazy so uh saint uh saint nick in uh the netherlands is supposed to come from spain not the north

pole really yeah and his and the reason why black pete is is black is that he's supposed to be a moor from Spain got it Morris like the moors they were they were like a rival

Muslim group right yeah so the whole thing's kind of like what the hell Europeans are low key the most racist people

on the planet oh hot tech hot take no I feel like every every two years there'll be a picture of prominent

Spanish athletes where they're doing, like, they're pulling their eyes to the side because they're making fun of an Asian team that they're playing a guess, right? One of the Italian clubs just tweeted out like a whole video making fun of it. Yeah. Like, what?

Yeah, it's bizarre how prevalent it is there. Yeah. But they always apologize for it. And they're like, oops, sorry, bad. I didn't realize this was offensive. You remember the picture that it was Juventus. Their women's team tweeted this was probably. Yeah, that's what I'm talking.

It wasn't, yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah, five, six months ago, it's a, it's a girl on their women's team wearing a, was it like a trash can lid or something on her head that resembled like an Asian, like hat. And she was squinting her eyes. And it said like, I forget what the thing said. And it was up for, I don't know, several hours. And they're like, oh, we now see how that could have potentially been offensive to some people. Oh, you know what it was. I think it was before the Beijing games.

the Olympic Games when the Spanish basketball team, it had like the Gasol brothers on it, maybe Ricky Rubio. I forget who else was on the team. They took their team picture, getting ready to go over China, and they all put their fingers on the corners of their eyes and pulled them out to the side for like the official team picture.

And then they had like, oh, sorry, didn't realize people are going to get upset about that. They say with their chest. It makes me feel like there's a huge miscommunity. That's just like how they think you describe other people. Yeah. It was a, it's a, It's a cone on her head.

I'm sending it to y'all right now. Who's the, I feel like you might know big to you. Who's like the really good soccer player who's got like the wildest blackface? He did it for Halloween a few years ago. He went as like a Harlem Globetrotter. Yeah, I know who you're talking about. Now, I can't remember. I don't want to say the wrong name.

Was it French dude? I think it was France. Hang on. I know what you're talking about. but I don't want to say the wrong guy. Antoine Griseman. Yeah. I was,

oh, I'm seeing another person. I'm sure. But Antoine Grisman tweeted about it. I forgot how funny the tweet is. It just says. He didn't do black face. He did black everything.

Correct. He painted his whole body black. He got an afro. He just tweeted 80s party with a basketball emoji and a crying face emoji. And he's standing there, smiling, grinning like a Cheshire cat, he is. This is in the number 69, 90s, all-star jersey. It was, Andre's Eniesta did it too. And he esther did it just two years ago, a Spanish legend.

On Three Kings Day, he dressed up in full blackface. And then he tweeted out a picture with the Three Kings emoji and then three star emojis next to it. and everybody was like what's what are you doing here in yester is that not how you guys celebrate christmas this is this is a wild picture yeah this 80s party well that's that was the 80s but grace is um so yeah that's that's bell schnickle and and and black peat or schwit depending on on which nomenclature you prefer uh Aryan. Good word. It's good word. Nomenclature. You got any, you got any particular traditions or weird Christmas things you want to talk about? I'm going to keep it a buck, man. Yesterday, I've totally planned on researching for this, and I got a tree and put on Christmas music and got really faded. And that's why I'm not drinking during the episodes, because I got so drunk last night. And I just, I spaced. I did. I apologize to all my macro.

That's why you had so much fun. Sure. I went from doing that's just sober. The fuck. It's really cute, though. Man, we painted our own little waterments. It was really cute. I like it.

I like it. Mad Dog, you got anything? Yeah, so I told, like I said earlier, we do St. Nick's Day. I've done St. Nick's Day my whole life. I didn't realize it was like not a widely celebrated thing. Like, when I was little, it was we had, um, my mom had like old ass i don't know they must have been from when she was a kid um felt boots and you would place them in your garage or outside and then overnight st nick was

supposed to come and he would like drop off like candy and like basically like kind of little stocking stuffers and i learned about it in school and stuff i kind of forget the origin of like because it's santa because st nick i was always taught st nick and santa are kind of like one the same like how Jesus the same person so I always did St. Nick's Day my mom like St. Nick's Day was two weeks ago

my mom sent me something up here for St. Next Day. Like that's always been something we do so I don't know I don't know I mean I don't think it has any evil connotations just because of it's like you just put your shoes out and then like a little elf man comes

and drops off little treats for you but we've always been like really into that that's always been like a big I guess not wildly celebrated tradition but we've always done that like all like where you just leave it out and then they'll just drop off like candy or something and it was or some people celebrated it where it was like it was like the poop of St. Nick and it was like candy like the Easter Bunny kind of thing wait do you think that the Easter Bunny's treats are as poop? I didn't take it that way. droppings. I mean, obviously, it's eggs. But, like, if we want to think of it that way, bunnies don't lay eggs, though. So when? No, you think that the Easter, like the candy that the Easter bunny leaves you is his poop. No, I'm not saying that. I'm saying there are, I guess, less poop more droppings. That's poop.

Poop the same thing. Confirm. What do you think droppings are? I'm saying they're a different and alternate kind. if the bunny can lay an egg it can be a different form of dropping if we're going crazy like that we might as well go full psycho yeah but

I think that's actually sneaky genius I'd never even it never occurred to me that the Easter bunny was shitting out all the chocolate that makes more sense than the current legend that we have of the Easter bunny but it's just like he gives you candy because there's really no explanation

I just I in my head the Easter Bunny, like, I guess it's depicted he comes and drops them off with a basket. Is that it? It's a terrible holiday for a lot of reasons. So, uh, I don't know, but I feel like it's, it's easier to think of as poop. Kind of.

Santa's Greek. In what, in what capacity? What do you mean? St. Nicholas was a fourth century Greek Christian bishop of Myra, now called Demra. the region of lycia in the roman empire today in turkey so he's actually Turkish oh wow just that he was Greek yeah Santa freedom Santa freedom so he's preferred pronouns yeah I will absolutely respect that man that actually that actually makes sense because if you think of Eastern Orthodox priests and stuff they all kind of look like Santa do they yeah look

like a very ornate yeah eastern orthodox are they priests well yeah i think they're priests well eastern yeah they all have that long beard type thing have like a cane oh yeah they kind of do look like so so that's where st nicholas was based off of um but he's sort of gotten his new look from people say that prior to Christianization, the Germanic people celebrated midwinter event called Yule with the Christianization of Germanic Europe, numerous soldiers. Soldier boy. Absorbed from Yulkeye's celebration. I was underrated.

The leader of the wild. I said that was an underrated. That was good. That was great. Basically, Santa looks like coded. Billy has no clue Billy He's just trudging along

You're gonna hear about this Eastern Germanics Santa I'm trying to get a little more That's Gucci's cousin Yeah dude Santa How do you

Okay so Go ahead Go ahead go ahead go ahead So Aryan and Coley I guess Aryan's kind of gone through this already But like How do you how do you in the perfect world where nothing spoiled how do you plan on telling your

children about santa or like when do you have that conversation i think arian is discussed this a couple times yeah yeah this is a different but your dog your first is really smart imagine your kid yeah yeah so the other ones i let the world ruin it for them like i'm not good i'll have the conversation with them and i'll explain why I let them along, but the kids are ruining it for it. You know what I'm saying? The kids be like, what the fuck? Still believing that bullshit?

They'll let them know. My thing is. I'm not going to spoil it for him. It's a legend, at least some iterations of the story are a legend based off of something that happened. So I don't understand why there is a lie to begin with. Like, yeah, there was

a St. Nick. We carry on tradition in his honor. I don't know how like a five-year-old could process all that so it is a harder concept to grasp but like it's a devastating it can be a devastating betrayal for some kids when they find out that they've been lied to all these years so I'm trying to avoid that part of it by trying to keep it as honest as possible like hey we have this tradition Santa brought toys to this town so we do it here because we thought it was cool and because the Christians had to steal

the pagan holiday of the sun god for their religious conspiracy yeah i'm not good five-year-old i'm willing to to because i'm such like a i'm like a very understanding father so like if they trip and hit themselves like i'm not like get your ass up you know what you know what i'm saying that's not me i'm more of like you know you'll be okay like where does it hurt talk to me or if they're upset about somebody taking a toy or whatever i always talk through it i let i actually I allow them to express themselves and I express what, you know, my side of the story or whatever. And so I'm very willing to have a conversation with them. It was like, why did you lie?

Like, and then explaining to them why. But I just think it's a, they'll, they'll be hurt. But I think as they grow older, they'll appreciate why I try to keep that innocence for them. Because as they grow, they'll realize there's so little shit to be happy about that, you know, this is. Did you all like. This is what I'm trying to keep. When you found out that Seda wasn't real, did you? all feel like betrayed or anything? I didn't know. I make sense. I was crushed.

No. Really? Crushed. I found out so much later because like my parents really didn't have a lot. So when there was a lot there on Christmas morning, it was hard for me to comprehend how they came about it knowing like why are we struggling in November if all of a sudden in December we have all Like I couldn't understand that side of it. And it turns out as I got older, I just found out my father would go into immense debt that he would pay off over the course of the next year just so we would have a great day. But when I was like nine, it made a lot more sense that magic was occurring. And we were just blessed this one day a year. So when I found out it was not betrayal is probably the wrong word, but it didn't.

I guess I just had more questions that I didn't know how to verbalize. yeah that makes sense yeah i i was um my brother told me so he he was two years old i me so he found out he got it ruined before i did and then so he ruined it for me just like passing it down he's like hey guess what i learned today sin it's not real i was like oh okay so i don't think i was that crushed by it i think i kind of had like i'd heard i'd heard whispers you know one time i believe that santa gave the presence to my parents and they put it there That makes sense. That's not what it was for a while.

I was like, oh, yeah, like there's a new system. And then at one point, I don't remember where I heard this, but I was told that because the world population was so immense, nowadays they offer different types of rebates straight from Santa. And they communicate that to every house. And like, they communicate with your parents. They send a letter to your parents about what can be reduced. teamed for your child.

This might give credence to that Bill Gates, Bill Gates depopulation theory. I've been working on this one for a while. I thought when I was younger, I grew up Muslim, so we didn't celebrate Christmas at all. And so I was a kid telling all the other kids that Santa wasn't real because they would come back to the school with like new gifts and shit. And I didn't have anything. And they'd be like, look at my God, I got this for Christmas. And like, Santa's not real. your parents got you that.

Like, no, uh, and so, like, my dad, I remember my dad, uh, used to get phone calls from school, like, your son is telling all the kids that there's no Santa. They're hating my son. Is it at school? Yeah. They hate loudly. Yeah. Your son is telling the truth in this picture. That's, that's, that's how I rationalized it then.

I was like, I'm just letting them know what it is. But, yeah. I just found a president in my parents' Trump. And I was like, holy shit, did you guys see what's in there? and they got so mad. They got mad at you? I just, yeah,

I think it's got, I got like, I got like, I got grounded because my mom was like, you shouldn't have been looking in there. And I was like, I was just hanging. I didn't mean to find anything.

And then it showed up Christmas morning. And I was like, wait a fucking minute. So my parents also kept up a ruse where I would open presents from them, Christmas Eve, which was like a couple, not like a ton. And then Christmas morning,

it was like, oh, Santa must have stopped by. Did you leave cookies and milk and shit? Of course, still do. I see. Just in case that niggas show up. Not only do you leave cookies and milk, Aaron,

leave a carrot for his reindeer. I've never heard that one. You leave a carrot for his reindeer? Yeah. They're a long trip to, friends. I've never heard. Oh, shit, you shouldn't be responsible to field him. Like, I should be on Santa.

You should bring the carrots. That's crazy. disagree, but listen, it's a long trip, got a lot of stuff. They're doing all the work. Ain't no free handouts out here, though, Big T, you know what I mean? You need the, they're his reindeer. The reindeer are putting in work on Christmas Eve.

They deserve a little refuel. The elves deserve a lot of credit. The elves, I mean, I can't believe that we just let Santa escape by on using sweatshop labor. The elves do all the work. Santa just tells them what to make, and then they break, they work their hands to the bone, making kids happy.

Santa is Steve Jobs. I was going to say it's like Nike. Literally another race of beings in making them work slave labor. I don't think it's confirmed that they're a different race. They're elves. I thought they were just, I thought they were just little people

or whatever the correct terminology for that is. I'm going to do a Billy segue here. The term Yule Lads, we should refer to elves as Yule Lads. Yeah. Well, the Yul Lads are different though. They're different. The Yule Lads are a different thing entirely.

I want to co-opped Yule Lads and replace elves with Yule Lads. I think the elves just need more shine. They need more credit because they're the ones that are doing the work. Santa gets to ride around on his basically taking a joy ride on his fighter plane around the world. And everyone was like, thank you, Santa. I appreciate it. You don't give any kids. We're acting like him going up and down chimneys all night, getting through places that don't have chimneys.

Like, we're acting like, this is a stroll in the park for him. I'll defend Santa. if you fucking naughty list heathens won't yeah well i'm let's do it let's put santa on trial another another macro dogean trial i'm down fuck that yeah i'm i'm gonna go into every mall in america and tell children to sit on my lap everyone give me credit that's real great work santa a little a little pedophilic over here sand is a weird so a lot of the stuff that we think santa does actually comes from odin Odin used to go down people's chimneys and give people gifts, but now Santa does it.

So he's just like an amalgamation of characters across the centuries? Exactly. I do like Christmas time, though. I think it's nice that we have something that as a country that we, you know, no one actually believes in Santa, but we all just kind of pretend because it's fun. We don't do that enough with things. I agree. We gaslight happiness into children.

It's so fun. I don't think that's bad. I don't think it's gaslighting because I think you're using the term gaslighting wrong. Yeah, Billy's gaslighting us as to what the term gaslighting means right now. It's just lying.

Yeah, there's no harm in it. It's called, so there's actually a psychological study on paternalistic. New psychological study just dropped. they basically say that like should we lie to our children and does it have lasting psychological impacts on the children so most children those people are assholes anybody that says you like that you're an asshole no so there's two there's there's three different responses and some are different uh the most common response is finding that the truth was that they felt older and more

mature they knew something that younger kids do not in other studies as false fraction children felt betrayed by their parents, but disappointment was a more calm response. Now, this was a small sector. Some children have reacted strongly, including rejecting the family's religious beliefs on the grounds that if the parents lied about the unprovable existence of Santa Claus, then they might lie about the unprovable existence of God as well. Keep those kids around. Those are the smart ones.

The kids that make that leap, they go, hold on. The why do we believe in this with no evidence, but we believe in this with no evidence? those those are the rational ones the other ones you know i got a question for big tea here so if it's a good thing that adults are lying to children about the existence of santa to make their lives a little bit better what about the government lying to you about any number of things like a massive conspiracy that took out jfk landing on the moon aliens being around you take your pick as to any of these government to make you happy so are you saying that that's okay that they do it.

Are you saying that it's okay that they lie to about stuff because it's for your own good? No, because one is in the interest of happiness of one's own children. The other is in the interest of keeping the truth from the American people. Not exactly the same motives there. Like you're their children, though. People were a lot happier before they learned how many drone bombs were going off. That ruined my day. Obama.

I didn't say who it was. I think we agree on that, brother. No, listen, that guy loved. nothing more than just drone in a Syrian school. I mean, absolutely nothing more. I, bro, I haven't fucking with you on that train all day. As long as we acknowledge every other administration that has done this. I'm with you.

That's horses shit. All right. So the Ullads. You guys want to talk about the Ullads? Absolutely. That's right. I learned about the Ullads first from Jeff D. There you go, Billy.

He got it from me, man. Jeff D. Lowe talked about the ULads. I think he heard about it. from Nick or KB. And they've been on this for a while. I know that Kate wrote a blog about it a while ago, too. But the Icelandic Ullads are maybe my favorite of the weird European Christmas tradition. So in Iceland, every year at Christmas time, it's not necessarily Santa that they talk about,

but there's a whole family that they talk about. There's, I'm going to mispronounce these, but Gryla is the mother. And Gryla is like this monstrous old lady. She's the mother of all the ULads. and so she is this troll mom that watches everything all year long and so she kind of she keeps a list going of which kids were naughty the entire time and if you're bad she'll come down from the mountains hunt the naughty kids and then she'll make soup out of them so that's what they tell the children over there like if you fuck up grela griela the mother of the yula is

going to come make a soup out of it now gryla's married to her husband lapaldi and lapaldi doesn't really do shit. He just kind of sits around the house and gets fat and eats child soup that his wife makes for him. But the mom is really the brains behind the operation. And then they have a cat and their cat is called the Christmas cat. It's a black hairy cat and it hunts kids and it'll eat you if you don't get new clothes on Christmas. So if you show up the day after Christmas wearing your same old grungy clothes in Iceland, you're going to get eaten by this ferocious black cat, which I thought was kind of interesting. So it's the, it's the three of them and then they're, their children, the Yule Lads.

So the tradition goes, I think there are 13 children. So on the 12th day of December, they start doing this thing every night where all the kids put shoes in their window. And one of the Yul Lads visits you every single night. If you've been good, they'll give you a treat in your shoes. If you've been bad, they leave you right. rotten potatoes in your shoes to be like, sorry, the Eulad has determined that you fucked up this year. So you get a rotten potato. So the Eulads are Stuykehouser. Stikhouser, his thing is he

harasses sheep. And he'll come down. And if you have a sheep, he'll just suck off your sheep and steal all the milk directly from it. That's what the first guy is known for. Problematic terminology right there, but continue. The second guy, It's pretty accurate. No, he's sucking off. He's sucking off straight from the source. The second guy is Gulligor, and he hides out, and then if you have a cow, he'll come in and he'll, he only drinks the foam from your milk of the cow. So the foam at the very top of the milk in the bucket.

That's what he'll do. The third guy is named stubby. He's really short, and then he'll steal your pans so that he can eat the crust off all the pans that you've left out if you don't clean your pans. it's just really weird shit they just basically come down and steal your food there's another guy who's a spoon liquor

there's a pot liquor there's a bowl liquor there's a guy that breaks into your house and just slams your doors he's the door slammer is there a dude that fucking

that takes socks or just like one side of socks I don't know if there's a sock guy there's one of the guys steal sausages if you're making sausage in your house

he'll come down and he'll steal it before it's done there's a window peeper a guy that just like looks in the windows. He's the pervert of the gang. Another guy that will steal the candles, a guy that will take all your meat, and then a guy that's a doorway

sniffer. So he just sniffs the doors. That's the pervert. Yeah. The doorway sniffers. That's some real weird shit. But those are the Icelandic ULads. And I kind of like, the ULads kind of rock. They're just like a bunch of mischievous little dudes that come down and just fuck up your house. Now, can, does the decision of the ULADs have to be unanimous, or can nine of the ULADs think you were good this year, but then four, you get potatoes?

I think it's up to each one of them. They're autonomous. Okay. I like that. I just found a very interesting group of people that are pretty related to the subject at hand. So it turns out there is a fraternal order of real bearded Santas. So these are the creme de la creme of Santas. It's actually, so the fraternal order of real bearded Santas, or Forbes, as it is,

is professional fraternity 501C7 for all American men who perform as Santa Claus. Members must grow and maintain their own facial hair for that purpose and agree to promote a positive image of Santa. The organization is a non-profit, mutual benefit, voting member corporation based in Orange County, California. is members in nearly every state with local and regional chapters, meeting monthly for socializing peer support and training. Membership dues are $25 per year.

Forbes has pioneered the most. This is where it gets crazy. Does it 501C7 mean like they don't have to pay taxes? Yeah. Forbes has pioneered the most comprehensive professional benefits package in the Christmas community, including in-depth background checks provided by the same company which serves the U.S. departments of state in defense as well as the entertainment industry's first liability insurance policy to also defend performers against false allegations of abuse or molestation protection ranges from 2 million to 4 million coverage per member. Wow.

So who the hell knows what's going on with those dudes meeting up monthly, just a bunch of bearded guys. What the fuck, bro? So they dress up as Santa and they collect dues and one of their missions is to protect people who are falsely accused of abuse? I guess they can like work with the, you know, idea that they won't get like if they get falsely accused, they have protection. Can you imagine someone asking you to hang out in April and you're like, oh, sorry, I can't that. And I'm in. I got to go to the fraternal order of real bearded Santa's meeting tonight. And the thing is, all the dude is exactly the same. So do they show up and party?

Is this a thing like just an excuse for dudes to get together and have drinks? Because I feel like a lot of those fraternal organizations in any town in America is just, hey, here's a club that you can join to get out of the house for an evening and have some cheap beer. Our 2022 reunion will be the biggest and best ever. They have it at Knott's Berry Farm. Nottes Berry Farm. It's, I think it's in L.A. Right outside L.A.?

I've been there. It's fire. It's an amusement park. Yes, so that's where their reunion is. That's wild, though. These guys must be like the A, like, you know, the special forces of Santa Claus's. The best sentence, yeah. The best.

So, wait, how do you get in? Contact us. Oh shit Oh my god That's not like some fucking Mason type shit Would a B one ass one This is actually hilarious

Go to their website And go to contact us And you look at the picture Of all these dudes They all look like The exact same dude They're all fat guys With super red faces

Yeah Like it's actually insane That all of these This could be There could be something else going on think let talk to us bill i don't know these guys look very uh very pro santa so you say you say i'm saying they see he's just saying they says man i don't know santa tim marsh

Santa bob callahan so it's like how it's like priests or like father you know whatever they just go i feel like they're doing it wrong they should go the lawyer route and have claws at the end so it's like bob claws yeah yeah yeah you should be doing it not yeah santa you're a thousand percent correct

i gotta say these guys look awesome though yeah they look a bunch of santa's yeah these they look like they're having a great time yeah as long as there's no nefarious activity like dan like child kids and shit yeah then i'm all for man just up and sats get fucked up and have you a little click man that's what's up Yeah, there's potential that's the most wholesome group in America. But with the caveat, it is a bunch of old white guys.

So who's to say? Yeah, do they allow black members? No, I don't know. I don't see. They're all white. I don't know. I don't know. That's hard.

Like, so I was in the store yesterday. We was putting up the tree, and I'm looking for like, decorations and shit. They don't sell like black Santa stuff. I'm sure I can get it online, but there's like no black Santa's. Like I shopped at Michaels. I don't know if y'all know Michael's like an art supply store for a tree.

They didn't really have any black Santa stuff. There's a bunch of it in Maine. And I don't know who it's for because there's not a lot of black people in Maine. Yeah, I don't know. I'm sure there is. I'm sure I can find. I just didn't see any. They have a lot of,

and I saw these. I've seen these in New York, Mass, and Maine. There's a lot of troop Santas. where they just They dress up Santa as a troop Like he's got guns Oh my

Oh my God That might be a lot of shit I heard Very funny Oh my No it's just regular camo It's it should be red camo Well that's babe

That'd be Babe Santa if it was red camo If there's one on Prime It'll be here on Wednesday Do you just You ordered a troop Santa I'm seeing if there's one on That can be here with two days Oh there has to be

We should get I don't see any on Amazon. I see Santa on a, like a Humvee making deliveries to troops. That's like an ornament. I'm trying to, I've seen them a lot. I usually Snapchat it to my brother-in-law because he's in the military. Now, for $113,13, it's not available for prime shipping, but you can't get an inflatable Santa.

in some sort of cameo with a god bless america candy cane sign in front of him let me see this to y'all i see that that's pretty good i will never understand that level of patriotism dot i mean troop santa should have a gun right all the troops says that i'm seeing he's not carrying anything he should certainly have a gun i found one with a gun oh yeah i see one of the guns too oh my god these are awesome we got to oh here's a really I'm going to send this one to the group chat too. This one is actually wearing like a military uniform. And on his nameplate it says Santa Claus.

And he's got like a patch on his arm too. Is this implying that Santa's, you know, out there doing war? Pulling up with his sleigh to the Middle East, drop in different kinds of presents? His sleigh says Lockheed Martin on the side of it. just fucking he wraps his bombs before he drops him uh yeah i think it also implies that every santa that's not a troop santa is anti-trip i've never thought about that until now oh man that's funny um cool you got any weird christmas traditions you want to talk about

um i mean crampus was the big one i knew we'd get to that one early I've talked about the Grinch on here in the past and I do feel like it's worth revisiting given where we're at in the calendar. The Grinch gets a bad rap. I understand he's a criminal breaking and entering. A lot of thievery. The entire spirit of Christmas, as PFT was talking about before, the happiness, the joy, the gift giving all of it this whole town of people just shunned someone because he looked a little

different extremely fucked up of course he deserved to rob them blind i'll always have his back uh he he was forced to live in the outskirts of society it's like uh what australia has done with the aborigines and they were just thrown them into the middle of that island disgraceful uh the who's should be ashamed and the grinch is the hero of that movie not the not the bad guy yeah so the grinch he's it's a turnaround story he becomes a good guy at the end he just needs he needs one person to show him love everybody hates him but my argument is he was always the good guy he his the fact that no one accepted him is why he acted that way like people treated him like shit not necessarily the other way around he got banished to that mountain he didn't live there by choice

society casted him off and he he has the self-realization to stop hate it true forgiveness big tea in the eyes of the grinch for giving all the who's down in whoville uh but he was never a bad guy is my overarching point yeah well you know who the bad guy of the grinch is is max the dog we've talked about this before too that max was a gift for one of the who's and they threw him into the dump he has just as much of a grudge as the grinch does but do you remember i i think i wrote a blog about it a year ago there was like this theory going around talking about how i think it called him the banality of evil because like he just blindly goes along with with everything that the grinch does and we've proven that he like is sentient so like he he's just

going along with it i'm trying to find it yeah no i you wrote a blog on the grinch last year and someone else did too and they both threw me into a fit of rage by how little people were watching that movie. Like, people just weren't paying attention. And it saddened and sickened me. That's why I get so passionate about him. He's a good guy, very funny, funniest person in town by far.

And the Who's, which I said this on Lights camera yesterday, it's kind of shocking. The Ron Howard Grinch hasn't been canceled because they just randomly stick blackface characters. into the movie for no reason at all. This was like 2001. Yeah. And Billy had a good tweet the other day where he was just questioning who

hires a Grinch because some people are hiring Grinches to come to their houses and just to act like an idiot. And this tweet is very funny. It's a person complaining a woman named Laura McGill. I paid 85 quid for a Grinch visit, advertises the Grinch to come in. the kids bed, have pillow fights, put toilet roll around your Christmas tree, and pictures with the kids at the end. What I got every single bit of a party food, expensive cupcakes threw all over the place, tree decorations broke, fairy up liquid poured on my kitchen floor,

eggs smash, and a full bottle of juice poured on my floor and on my son. Kids new onesie ruined, highly, highly do not recommend. And then she puts a bunch of pictures up of just an absolutely trashed living room. This guy just showed up to the house. Wrecked her house, ruined her son. Poor what looks like grape juice all over her son's face and clothes. Smash trays of food on her living floor

and then dipped out. Respect to that Grinch. That's an awesome job. That's a great job. The rest of the grinchers aren't doing a good job. I'm out. I know I had to step away when I was thinking, but there are people that hire people to come fuck, they shit up.

They dress as Grinch. Yep. This lady was upset that she got an exceptional grinch. Dude, like, this place was fucked. She gave a five-star review. He did too good of a job. That's what I mean. This is why the customer is always right. It's one of the bigger lies we've been told in society.

Like, this guy was maybe, yeah, like big TV was saying too good of a grinch. I am in shock that people pay. I mean, yo, wow. I just, I've never heard this shit before. What a great job. We're in the wrong profession. I would love if people just paid me to come. You don't have to clean it off.

You just get to leave with your 85 quid and have yourself a day. That is amazing. That's what a stress reliever. Like, come fuck my house up and I'll pay you to do so. Just dressing green. It's a great job to have if you can get it. If anybody wants to pay me to do that, I'll grinch the shit out of their house. No question.

You know, I'm in. It'll be a great, I'll, you know, we'll do the little dog and everything, whatever. Like, Big T was talking about spite and hating people earlier. The Grinch was such a great thief. He would steal the light bulb out of your fridge. Like, that's, you talk about truly holding a grudge. Like, you're not forgetting anything. You're stealing anything that can omit light in your homes coming with me.

Nice. Good luck tomorrow night, fuckface. Yep. agree with coley the grinch did not the grinch did nothing wrong he was a victim of society yeah i agree yeah systemically they didn't take care of it was an orphan right was an orphan they treated him like shit in the orphanage i'm with you grinch was a good dude man why is he green do we ever figure that out so the beginning of the ron howard one which is the the deepest it goes into the lure uh lore he was heading for a different town um and

And a wind gust blew him into Hoovill. So theoretically, it implies, which I don't know how this sequel hasn't been made before Hollywood could write it patent pending. So now they owe me money. The second movie should be him going to that other snowflake where the Grinch town, like there's a theoretically an entire town of Grinch people out there, much like there is of Hoops. Wow.

We need the origin story of the Grinch, bro. I mean, him going home to find his people. And since he's been hoovalized, it's almost like he'd be too nice now. All these other Grinchers would be calling him soft and probably making fun of him. Well, no. Yeah, they're probably nice in general.

Whoville made him like that. Yep. It could be. So I'm saying since we last left him, let's write it right now. He's accepted by Who society. He's kind of king shit down there now. I got it.

I figured I got you. This is what happens. So he continues his journey back to Grinchville. right and on his way to grinchville he encounters all these problems of trying to get there people chastising him again he gets pissed off again right and then when he gets to grinch town thinking fuck i finally got here he has his heart reopened because everybody's so fucking nice there yeah that'd be that'd be a beautiful story to see and you have to wonder if there's somebody if there's a who that ended up in grinchville would the grinches treat that who the same way the

who's treat the grinch and would that who have been accepted by the society of Grinch's. I think it's probably more likely that they would have taken the Who in and treated the who well. I think that the who's are the real problem in the story. That culture is toxic. I agree. Taxiculture.

It'd be such a funnier movie, though, if there had just been, like Steve was living in a mountain and he came down and was breaking into a bunch of Grinch's house. What a fuck. That would be amazing. You know, somebody write that shit, though. Somebody write the Grinch origin story. Or what do you? It wouldn't be an origin story.

Oh, it would be the second spot. Yeah. The Grinch goes home. Yeah. Sneaky, sneaky Dr. Seuss book. The Grinch is a Dr. Seuss book. Yeah.

Is that sneaky? No, but like people forget that. I don't think so. I don't think so at all, actually. You know what we should do as an episode? though, is we should do a Dr. Seuss episode and talk about the different themes that he was writing into his different books, because there's a lot of subtext to a lot of the shit that he put out over the years. And was he writing them? Oh, is that another one? He had a ghost

writer, like Shakespeare? I believe it was, if I'm thinking of the right children's author, which I believe I am, I believe his wife wrote most of them. Wow. And he wasn't even a doctor. He definitely ill. I think he drew. Yeah, I think you're right, I think he drew, but I think she did all of the writing, and I think she even came up with a lot of them.

Man, I don't know enough about Dr. Seuss, man. That would be a fun episode to dive into. You talk about it canceled? Did he? Yeah. No, that was like two places that, like two of his old,

old cartoons that were taken out of certain libraries. Yeah. oh yeah they went out and bought all those yeah i mean dr sues is definitely definitely not canceled but there were there was like one part of i to think that i heard it on mowlery street one of his older older books that was like and then he runs afoul of an oriental person and then there were a bunch of people that were asian that were dressed up in like stereotypical Asian outfits so people were like let's take that out he drew world war two propaganda he did Against the Japanese, that was pretty problematic, but propaganda.

Yeah, but nobody is saying anything about Horton, Here's a Who, Cad the Hat, Grinch, green eggs and ham, one fish, two fish. You can still find those wherever you want. Yeah. The Butter Battle book might be my favorite one because that one is just straight up about the Cold War, a million percent. I don't know the Butter Battle one. It's about two societies that hate each other,

and they absolutely hate each other's guts. at war with each other. And the only difference between the two societies is one society butters their toast butter side up and the other butters are toast butter side down. And that's it. And so, yeah, I mean, we do need to get into that later, I think. And then there's in the cat in the hat, the entire premise of the cat in the hat is they put a red stain in the house or maybe that might be the cat in the hat comes back.

There's a red stain in the house. And then the red stain starts spreading all across the house. And the only way that they can get rid of the red stain. is with a tiny subatomic little cat that has a powerful explosive device that just ruins everything. So you can you can connect the dots on that one a little bit. I don't get it. I like one fish, two fish. Greenflit. One fish, two fish? Redfish, bluefish. Yeah. Redfish blue fish. Yeah. We got anything else on Christmas we want to get into or maybe some voicemails? I like Christmas. I like Christmas too.

I love it. It's the bad. What we should end on this is it everyone's favorite holiday. It should be. Thanksgiving. Terrible. Christmas is maybe second. I like Thanksgiving because it comes first. I like the buildup of Christmas.

And I just like to say Thanksgiving to start of that. Yeah, but I don't like, it's not that I like Thanksgiving because it's the build up to Christmas. I like Thanksgiving for other reasons. I like, I like a, like the December 1st through the December 25th, too. I like eggnog. Ugh. No. I haven't had, I haven't had eggnog in years and I bought something yesterday.

I was going to try it. I don't even remember what it tastes like. Alcoholic milk. Well, there's no alcohol as it yet. I thought there was some that come alcoholic. What? I don't know enough about egg, no. I don't think it would, it was in the milk section,

so I don't think they would sell alcohol in the milk section. And they didn't card me, so I figured it was probably just. I thought there was, I thought there was, again, I'm not an eggnog. I thought there was certain eggnogs. You could buy like non-alcoholic or alcoholic eggnog. I think I'm really wrong. Yeah, you might be. I don't know enough about eggnog.

I know when I bought it, it was in the milk section. and they like nobody carded me so I assumed and it would say it on the package too right I don't know I'm not an eggnog person I just thought that there was like

the alcoholic and non-alcoholic I didn't realize you had always add your own you can buy an alcoholic eggnog in a store like at a liquor store a lot of times they have it there but yeah most of the stuff that you get in grocery stores you have to add your own booze

what kind of alcohol do they put in it You can put brandy, whiskey, rum, Irish cream, Irish brown. Irish cream best is usually the best. Yeah, McAley's. Yeah, before we get to voicemails, I just want to raise awareness about one thing. I've seen a lot of people talking about the Pizza Hut triple decker box that comes around the holidays. You've seen the commercials on TV.

It does not come in that stacked dresser drawer format. It just comes in three boxes. It's bullshit. don't get it. I just want the triple stacker deck box like they show on the commercials, triple treat box. It's bullshit that it doesn't come in drawers. I have a question.

How do you know? Because there's no pizza huts in Manhattan. So I know you haven't gotten it. I've ordered it in the past. This isn't the first year that they've done it, Big T. Okay. So what if they changed it this year? Well, everybody is confirming to me that they do not sell it in the triple treat stacker drawers.

Okay. I just don't, I don't want a billy situation. here. No, I ordered it. I think it was maybe back in 2012 when I was in Austin. What does that mean? You know what? Saying things we haven't confirmed.

I'm just trying to bring as much as I can to the table. I know, I know, but it has happened. A lot of spice here. You guys, you guys want to talk this one out? No,

there's no ill will from that. Seems like there was a little bit of things that turned out. There's a little ill will. No. No, no, no. You don't put words in my mouth. Okay. Or intention in my heart. All right. Let's get to voicemails. How about that? Voicemails are presented to you by our good friends over at NHTSA, National Highway Transportation Security Administration.

It's that time of year again. They're holiday parties. They're get-togethers with friends, get-togethers with families. You put back a few drinks. A few can become a few. too many. And as the evening comes to an end, people start to head out. You think about calling for a ride, but you just say, no, you know what? You live nearby. You can make it home. Okay. It's not a big deal. What's the odds that you're going to get pulled over anyway? Well, it is a big deal. You could lose your license. You could lose your job. You could kill someone. You could total your car. Your insurance could go up. You can get arrested. Everybody knows about the risks of driving

drunk. The results are tragic and often deadly. I want everybody out there to be safe. There's no excuse for driving drunk in this day and age. You can get a ride from a friend. You can get a ride from Uber or from Lyft. Just takes one mistake to change your life or someone else is forever. Drive sober or get pulled over. For more information about the drive sober or get pulled over campaign, go to NHTSA.GOV slash drive sober. That's NHTSA.GOV slash drive sober. There's no excuse for right now. Don't hurt yourself. Don't hurt someone else. Don't get arrested. I'm telling you right now, There will be police out in full force this holiday season. Don't make that mistake.

It's so easy to get a sober ride home. Don't put yourself in danger. Don't put somebody else in danger. Drive sober or get pulled over. I actually have to go. I might be able to get a test at four. So I'm going to run. All right.

Take care of yourself, man. Good luck. Thanks, guys. Peace. You guys want to take bats on whether or not Billy has coronavirus? I'm going to go with no. I think he does I think he does

Yeah I think Billy's sick I can see it in his eyes You can't see These eyes are fighting eyes That's the last That's how he logged up That's how he logged out Last words we'll ever hear

From young Bill That'd be fucked up Okay Are we ready for voicemails Yep I'm just playing through my laptop I need to work hey guys love the podcast my name is jake i'm from box bromass um my question for you guys is

you were all to go into war against each other and could harness control over any species in the world except for humans in order to beat one another what species would you guys choose um mad dog and aaron you guys are beautiful the rest you guys there you keep it all beautiful so much thank you so much billy's gonna be so mad he missed this question yeah 100% But that is a dope-ass question. Go ahead. You take the reins, Big T. Wolves, because they'd fuck up Aryan.

Oh, wow. A whole bunch of them, yeah, but I catch one of them niggas one-on-one. I think I've got the correct answer. Bees. Bees. You get every bee in the world on your side at your disposal. You will ruin somebody's day by sending. and then a swarm of bees at them.

And with all the people out there that are allergic to bees, you could kill off a shitload of people. But we're just trying to kill. I took it as everyone else on the show. And it's like everyone has their own species that you're fighting against. Right. So we got to kill the army of plus PFT or just PFT. I think it's PFT with his army.

I think it's everyone in their army. Oh, yeah. Well, that changes things. Okay. I was thinking similarly to PFT with the mass. So I'm going spiders. I get all the spiders. Yeah.

Yeah, they're fucking done. The spiders would have the earth now if they had someone leading the charge. They're just very... I would take out spiders so easily. You just kick them. They're all on the ground. Good luck. When all of them going...

When you have a million spires coming at you, family, I would fuck up. Jumping, like, forget it. Your dick's going to explode. I would fuck up spiders easily. So I just looked it up there. just honey bees that are kept in hives in the world two trillion just honey bees we're not even talking about wild bees you know how many two trillion is that's so many bees a lot of bees that's so many bees you would get fucked up by these bees i'm gonna go i i think and because i

had the fortunate um uh placement in in my picking i was originally going to go with bears because I feel like they're the most ferocious things. Bears are hippos, but because I know PFT strategy now, I'm going to have to go with some kind of virus or bacteria on my side. Got, I pick an animal. They didn't say I have to pick an animal. I have to pick a living organism, or did he say animal? I think the question was animal.

I think it was pretty clear. I think it was species that isn't. He said species. He said species that's not a human. Viruses are species? Bacteria have species. Yeah, they're species. Do I get to have spiders and a mask then?

because then I feel pretty well, you put a little mask on all your spiders, bro? No, what I'm going to do, especially to avoid PFTE, I'm going to have them build me like a tent out of all of their,

um, webs, which I'll be able to breathe through, but will be impenetrable to the bees. So I'm, I feel great. Your bear would have done more than, uh,

the virus. Hold on. I'm a see, I'm a see, I'm going to see if I can even do this. A virus is a sub-microscopic infectious agent. It's an agent. So it's not a, so it's not, it can't survive outside of its host.

So a species is defined as a class of individuals having some common character which qualities distinct. Okay. In biology, the major subdivision of a genus or subgenus regarded as the basic category of biological classification composed of related individuals that resemble one another are able to breed amongst themselves, that's where we're, where I lose. Okay. Okay.

So I can't do. You can give a bare COVID and send it out. A COVID bear. Yeah. Yeah, okay, well, I think I'm a, I can't go with, because I think all the bees will absolutely destroy all the bears. Although, wait, hold on, bears fuck with honey. And they be, there are, they're natural enemies, yes.

I think that would be a good, like, fight to watch. Mm-hmm. I don't know, because there's so many more bees than there are bears. Mm-hmm. We're outnumbered. And so I need something, do you know what? It depends. What terrain are we fighting on?

That matters. Let's call it like a, we're in a vacuum. So we're all dead, we can't breathe. It's like a universal, like everyone, there's no, like a net, it's a net neutral field. Okay, okay, net neutral field. So that brings aquatic animals into the fold. you know what I'm struggling to find a species

off the top of my head that can outdo bees on a mass scale like that I already said one spiders no there's no way they fly bees fly it's done spiders have no problem getting airborne there's some spiders but not all spiders but that's still a lot of spiders

it's so many spiders well okay now you're dealing with okay they can set trash with like webs and shit that would be a good little face off that would be a good little face off you know what and we've got poison in our our like pfpf's backing on allergies i'm not allergic to he's baking no i think there's some there's some that's like there are yeah there i mean there are murder hornets but those aren't bees hornets aren't bees pf oh well i'm taking i'm taking i'm taking hornets or wasps also also if you have a shitload of bees that are stinging you're not going to be able to do anything. Again, I have the cocoon, the spiders have built for me.

I'm safe. Yeah, it's the flying that I'm a fan of. And yeah, so I'm going to have to go with like wasps or a hornets, wasps. Yes. I think so. Yeah. I think, yeah. So I'm going to, I'm going to go with the hornet because it sounds more dangerous than

a wasps. I'm going to go, I'm going to hornets. I feel like elephants is a good one, because there might not be a lot of elephants. but I feel like with the bees I don't think their skin would really be hurt by a bee sting they're big so they can step on all the spiders

I feel like an elephant could take on a bear pretty easily but elephants look at us the way that we look at dogs so they would probably just become friends with me when they walked into my apartment they would boot me

it's one of you versus like eight trillion bees like I feel like the bees is the thing I have to worry about more definitely like the human at any week i mean we're the weakest of the links here so i feel like if i had like an elephant like a ton of elephants like their skin is really thick and callous and they could step on everything and i just feel like they would take over bears so here's an interesting fact um a bee stinger can't penetrate the thick hide of an elephant but when bees swarm

and African bees swore aggressively, hundreds of bees may sting an elephant its most sensitive areas. So they have like areas that are prone to, but the majority of the elephant is unaffected by bee stings, which is dope. That would be a good fight, man. That would be.

What if the bees, what if PFT taught the bees how to form like mice and ran up on the elephant, now they're scared? Now you're sounding like an NBA Reddit post right now. I mean, this is the 10,000. rats question like that's all this is if you got 10,000 like what's that graphic it's like you can pick two animals to protect two groups of animals to protect you the rest are coming to kill you

and one of the options is 10,000 rats and like that has to be one of your picks you do not want 10,000 rats on the other team you just don't yeah if i have if i have 10 000 cats I wouldn't go fuck maybe cats you talk about mercurial like you cannot coach a cat they're not going to listen to your leadership. Oh, no, now we're talking about uncoachable cats. That's a great question, man. Whoever that guy was, man. Shout out to him, man. Good shit. That was fun. Right. Ready for the next one?

Yep. So there everybody. Max. I'm a dude from beautiful Los Angeles. My question for everybody is, who do you think is worst? Taylor Swift fans or Donald Trump fans Please put this in Even though I know you think this is a ridiculous question I want to know from everybody else So yeah, I love the podcast

Get me through my work today Can't thank you all enough Stay handsome, stay beautiful, stay gorgeous Who are the first group of fans? Taylor Swift For Donald Trump I have my answer and I don't think I need to say I just think that

you know your answer. I just think that anybody that's a fan of a politician is usually pretty annoying. Yes, Max. Don't be a fan of a dude that is or a girl that's running for office just so that they'll take advantage of you later. Also, I think the reasons as to why their fans is a lot more defensible. So, like Taylor Swift, I can understand the fandom of Taylor Swift. She's fucking talented. Like, she's really talented.

at what she does. Like, I'm not a fan of her music, but she's talented, right? Like, if you're a fan of Donald Trump, like, I think you're a fan of either one or two things. You're a fan of the lower behind it, and you know it pisses people off, which says a lot more about, says a lot more about you than anything else. And I think another reason is you're a fan of, like, I can see being a fan of his, like, his capitalistic ventures. But then again, that just says more about you. Like, I, like, Donald Trump fans. Like, if you like his policies, that has nothing to do with this. But if you, you're a fan of

Donald Trump, like, I don't understand that. It's usually because Donald Trump makes people that you don't like mad. That's where a lot of it comes out. Yeah. Yeah. And he is objectively very funny sometimes. I saw, I was reminded of a quote that he had that I think he put out like a year ago, two years ago when he was doing one of his rally tours. And he was, you know, airing his grievances that he always had against low flow toilets and showerheads. That was like one of the things that he hated the very most was like, you can't take a shower anymore in this country. It's disgusting. But he was talking about, he was like, you know, we don't have the,

we don't have the water pressure in our showers. We don't have them in our faucets. And we don't have them. Where's the other place? People, where's the other place? And everybody was like, toilets. And he was like, yep. He was like, yep, that's exactly right. And it doesn't take care of everything you need to take care of. Not for me, of course, but for you guys, like to the fans. So he's saying, like, you guys, I'm sick of, I'm sick of you. My fans have such massive shits that these toilets take. And then the crowd like goes nuts when he says it.

It's just objectively hilarious that this is the person that he is. He's a very funny individual. And like, undoubtedly he has done so much. to get people's attention on politics because, I mean, I don't think there was more watched things than the Republican primaries. Like, it was debating.

Like, it was just good TV. And I don't know if that says anything about me, but it's just fucking hilarious to see him roast him motherfuckers day and the day out. All the people that are, like, grown up doing all the right things in politics to get ahead, they've, you know, served in the Senate for 30 years and then Donald Trump gets on stage.

She's like, this guy's fucking short. And everyone's like, yeah. Renn Paul's like, damn it, he's got me. He's like, that guy, that guy is the murderer. Yeah. Joe, Joe, Ted Cruz is ugly. His wife's ugly. Crazy a far.

Ted Cruz's turn right around. It's part of my, one of my favorite tweets of all. one of my one of my favorite tweets of all time is marco rubio sitting in that gigantic chair and it says uh campaign director please please don't take a picture in the chair please don't send the chair it says marco we he was oh it was great i didn't see that one though and then just inviting mitt romney out for a nice dinner just to tell him he's not going to be secretary of state that was awesome no

this is an asshole when was it Halloween and the minion came up and he was just patting him on the head

yes like incredible just incredible no bro I remember when he paid the kid like 20 bucks to mow the white house lawn

because he like the kid went viral for mowing lawns or something and Trump was like come to the white house and he gave him like $20

yeah fucking shooting paper towels to people in Puerto Rico. Was it Puerto Rico? Yeah. And I'm here reminiscing on the Trump era.

Look at this. After Clemson wins a national championship, they go to the White House and he's just got a shitload of big Max and filet. He was correct on that. He was right on that. That's a feast of kings. Oh, my God.

The spread they had there was unbelievable. It did look like for college kids. Awesome. Yeah, I can't imagine a better day. Yep. I can. That show was great. I still think that they should have just told him that he won the election,

but just put him in a fake White House that was just mounted with cameras everywhere and just had it be a reality show so we can we could just watch them. How much did he won the election PFT? If they said you can get full access to all these cameras, how much would you pay a month to watch that? Oh, my God. Probably like a month. Yeah, probably probably.

probably a hundred bucks a month just for the entertainment value of it it would be the trump administration i would watch that every week bro is that a dog yeah i'm like bad dogs right now jesus fucking christ that's what i'm fucking fuck with him that's something like um remember that dog on a mask when you put the mask on mhm it sounds like that dude what else we got mad dog we got one more I finally figured out, hold on, time out.

I finally figured out who you look like. You ain't going to know who this is. PFT might, though. Me? Yeah. You look like the lady referee on guts. Do you mind? Mo?

Mo. Mo. You can't look her up. No. She was Australian. Oh, well, she, I thought she was British. I thought she was Australian. I mean, it's close.

Oh, shit. Is it Boyer, a quirk? I have no idea what her name is. Wait, I don't, okay, maybe a little bit. Wait, I'm going to send it on guts. Set it over to Moat. Yeah. What's that?

Oh, Guts was bigger than the Olympics, depending on how you asked. In 43 seconds. All right, maybe my memory is a little off. The agro-cragg. I mean, nah. A little bit. I can see it. see it.

It wasn't given my first, but I can see it. Go ahead, man, my bed. My bad. I still can't, like, when they made it global guts and you got to stand up there with your flag and they gave you a medal, like, I would care so much more about that than winning the Olympics. It's not even funny. Brody, Agro-crague was a dream of mine when I was a kid.

That's all I wanted to do. How high do you think it would be now if you stood next to it, 20 feet? Yeah, if that, like, yeah, that sounds about right. If that, if that. Big T, do you know what this show is? I know, like I've heard about it. It was before my time. Yeah, it's before your time.

This is like the are you afraid of dark times? All that. That kind of shit. 90s Nickelodeon was cracking out game shows at such an unsustainable rate, but every single one of them hit. Slap. Hidden Temple, God's God. Double dare, double there.

Double there, double there, 2000. What would you do? What would you do? Bang. Like, absurdly good game shows that really, for this kids network, that had no need to have all these good game shows. It was insane. Yeah.

I looked up what the agro-crag was because I didn't know what you guys were talking about. And there's a article that comes up that says dozens of teenage bodies still are Nickelodeon's agro-crag. Are there dead people? Is that like click hole or one of those websites? Hard drive.net? Yeah, I think that. That's funny.

That is not real. Oh. It's fake news. That'd be great. I mean, I would love to say. I mean, the lawyer behind would be. Okay. Ready for the last voice, ma'am?

Let me do it. Hey, what's on, guys. This is Joe from Lake Packard, New Jersey. Question for you guys. If you were given. the ability to give a TED talk on anything you choose. It would be something that you know well about or something you're interested in researching.

What would it be and why? I love the show, guys. And if you ever want to take a ride out on the lake up here in northwest New Jersey, feel free to contact me. You can come back out on the pontoon boat. I have a good day. All right. Love you guys.

Have a good one. That last part was kind of, what did he say? He lives in northwest New Jersey and he would take us out on his pontoon boat if we ever desired. Oh. Chili's in the caucus and then go up to his pontoon.

That was nice. I've got mine. What is it? Why Andrew Jones and Dale Murphy should be in the Hall of Fame. Crying shame should be. Should have been in first ballot. Cry like one of the greatest

defensive player of an entire generation hit more than 400 home runs. Unbelievable. Like he I think his career war is well over 60, which is like generally the Hall of Fame barometer. Like it's, it's a show. And then Dale Murphy, if he played on any other team other than the Braves in the 80s who were trash, he'd be in the Hall of Fame.

He went back to back MVP's. It's bullshit. This is why we shouldn't have old media people voting on this. It's a joke. I also think that Dale Murphy, if all of his games were broadcast on TBS, that would have gone a long way too. If he was on the Braves 10 years, 10, 15 years later, or played on another team, he'd be in the Hall of Fame.

I like it. And Andrew Jones, I don't know what the justification is for getting him out. The thing I hear constantly with Andrew Jones is like after his first 10 years, he fell off. And what I don't understand there is 10 years is such a long period of time. If you take out all the years, he was one of the best players in Major League Baseball. He wasn't really that good. Right. Right.

When you think about it that way, people say that with like a straight face. They're like, oh, yeah. When he got the Dodgers, he was bad. It was like, okay. and in in 2012 yeah what what what what am i missing here like he was one of the best players i've ever seen like he was a monster absolute mom i would have made has a higher uh defensive run saved and boy oh boy do i not trust that fucking stat like andrew jones it's the best defensive center fielder of all time like by far maybe the best defensive player of all time

one of the three or four correct and oh yeah like you said also hit four like this isn't an Ozzy, not an Omar Visckel situation. Like, he hit four hundred home runs. Like, very comfortably should be in the Hall of Fame. Don't know why he isn't. And very cool, too, like an extremely cool player to, to be that cool as a center fielder, while Griffey is still a cool center fielder, like, he was holding his own in that cool debate.

I don't, there are no black marks against Andrew Jones. Spells his name cool. The monster. His son might be the number one. pick next year. Right. Like everything you could argue against is like you just can't. Like that's a flawless argument and he's just not in the Hall of Fame.

And I really hope he had the World Series when he was, what, 19 years old? Yeah. I really hope his son is the number one pick too because he's committed to Vandy and I don't want to have to root against him. Yeah, you'll probably go pro. I think I would give my TED talk on. how downfield laterals can change the game in professional football. Did you see that Jets play? Yeah, perfect.

That's what should happen all the time. And that, the upside that they had on that play, yeah, they got a first down and it was awesome. But that's like an average type play result that you can expect when you run a downfield lateral like that. The upside is so much bigger than that. What was the thing I'm trying to remember in my head. What was like the net gain if he had like from where he threw the lateral

when he got tackled, but he got like about seven yards at that point? It was about seven yards, but also if I'm nitpicking a little bit, Barrios didn't run onto it. So in rugby, you're taught to, you've already got like a head of steam.

He caught it standing still, which you could probably add another six, seven yards to that if he catches it well, he's at a full sprint. Right. But yeah, it'll change it once the coach figures out how to do it correctly

and minimizes the risk, it's going to change the game. Yeah, it will. was a i i understand why we're i mean we're at the foreground here pf t like we're going you need to build on top of the foundation that was good foundational play i think their spacing was kind of trash on it i think they could have cleared out a lot of those blockers that they had set up for barrios and they would have had he would have got more yards just by their simply not being more defenders over there like there's a lot to build on that but yeah i think

it was a good first step Aaron, what would you give a TED talk on? Yeah, so I think I would give a TED talk on how pretty much every societal goal that we have is counterproductive to our happiness. Okay, it sounds like a real feel-good hour that they'd spend with you. No, this is, this is self-reflection time, man. This is not a feel-goat. Are you saying that making a shitload of money doesn't always make you happy?

That is exactly what I'm saying, my brother. Just everything. All of our goals are fucking governmental goals, our personal goals. It's all driven towards not being happy. And like that is, which is kind of, it's like so counterintuitive too because when you think about it, like we all, you know, bust out of ass from Monday to Friday to do what, to be happy on the weekend, right? like that's the goal of life and the goal should be to extend that period to be happier throughout the entire time but we don't do that we just continue to perpetuate this cycle of massacism the rat race up what about you mad dog um i mean the first thing that comes to my head is like the brown something with the brown and how how how they like the browns fans have gone through the most of any NFL team and in in the whole

history including pre-99 something like that but i don't know if i could talk about that in like full expertise i'm just passionate about that honestly i would probably talk about restops like something about like or rest stops or like breast stops or like breast stops in airports and hospitals my top three and how the they have no sense of time inside of them. Okay, it's like Vegas, yeah. I've never been to Vegas, so I don't know, but like you can go into any of those three at any time of the day and you could have breakfast, lunch, dinner, get drunk, it doesn't

matter what time it is and no one's going to bat in that. And if you think time is an illusion, like go into any of those three places and that will be confirmed to you. Get drunk in a hospital. I like it. You've never been to Vegas? No. how old are you how old are you

22 I mean it's about that time I turned 21 during COVID though so like oh yeah damn yeah y'all's youth has been

fucked up because of this shit yeah like I turned 21 when we were still at like the stay at home lockdown like real real COVID so I didn't even go to a bar on my 21st birthday

so like you have a drink at the crib yeah I just drink in my backyard nice yeah but so i haven't had a chance to go out there yet and that like now i have like a job and stuff so i would just have to find time to go out there i also i don't know i do want to i've never been to a casino i want to go to a casino soon two birds one stone i know there's like there's like a casino in cleveland i could go to that and you know knock that out in the night but that's right jacksino but but probably

something about how time is an illusion in those three places. That or why deer should be taken more seriously as a threat. Three. Two. What? Deer kill a shitload of people. Yeah. Well, that's because we run into them, right? Or they charge you. How many, how many deer attacks are there? Like, I'll look. I think it's mostly just car accidents. Also, the deer tick kills a lot of people through Lyme disease. That's the fucking fault, too. No, it's not different. Their predators just hopping on to us.

Like, we need to not be around the deer. Well, if we eliminated the deer, the tick would have nowhere to go. I mean, obviously, it can go to us. Yeah, no, they're a real problem. It says there are over 200 fatalities and 10,000 injuries yearly by deer accidents. Not 200? That's not a lot. There's 330 million people in America. I'm straight.

also zombie deer disease what is that now we're playing percentages deer kill more people in America than any other answer we've always played percentages I don't know that's not what I've been hearing yes it is death is one death is too many

no it's not I don't know I'm gonna get for more deer this listen when these deer are invasive and I can pass on a murderous deer to you they you can give to Grandma tea, then yeah, we can, we can talk about it. Oh, he was... You can get inoculated against the deer.

Oh, he was talking about... Yeah, deer... Deers aren't contagious, my guy. Unless there's a new deer variant that has dropped. That's all I'm saying. There's no slippery slope here. There's zero simply slope. Yeah, I don't like deer.

Deer scare me. I don't think they're interested. Have you ever had deer meat? I don't think so. Ray, I've heard it taste. I wouldn't mind eat. I guess I wouldn't go out of my way to eat it, but like eating it, it's like, whatever.

Like, that's a different thing. A live version of the deer when it's in my backyard, and it's like doing the, where it strikes its hoof, fuck off. No, I hate that. They scare the shit out of me. So zombie deer disease is a highly transmissible disease that different, I guess, species or types of deer have where it attacks their brain as are still alive and it turns them into walking zombies where they're just going to, they don't eat, they get all patchy, their hair falls out and they eventually die. I think it's 100% fatal.

And so people are saying that if you eat infected meat, that humans can get it as well. And there are certain parts of the country where people are not supposed to be eating deer that they kill because, is so prevalent in those areas. Joe Rogan talks about it a lot. Billy taught me about it. That's how I know about it. But it's a very, it's a real disease,

but there's just, there's been no evidence yet of it having a significant spread to humans. Yeah, I don't have to hear of that. I don't find them to be useful in the grand scheme of things. They're cute though. They're very cute.

From a, like from afar. Yeah. Anybody else have a TED Talk idea? I mean, the only thing I can think of, similar to Big T's, just an hour rant about how Pedro Martinez was not only the 99 MVP, but very clearly the best pitcher of all time.

Oh, okay. Really? Oh, also the 1992 National League MVP up, well, the 97 Heismant, too, we'll just combine those, the two most fraudulent awards ever given out in the history of sports. Go look up the 1992 National League MVP. You'll be appalled. I think, did Barry Larkin win it? And he hit, like, I don't even.

I wrote a blog on it. It's disgusting. And then the 97 Heisman went to Charles Woodson, who had like four interceptions and was trash. Peyton Manning, one of the greatest players in the history of college football. The two most fraudulent awards ever given out in the history of sports. The 92 NL MVP is Barry Bonds.

Okay. Then it was 96 or something. Yeah. He was called Charles Whitson Trash and Barry Bonds. No, he was a great player in the NFL. But in 1997, he was nowhere near Peyton Manning. what are you talking about Charles Wilson played both ways

yeah he had like eight receptions for like 140 yards it was sickening how many how many tackles did Peyton Manning had when he was out of ball what did you mean bro what is you talking about probably a couple he threw a lot of picks you're crazy

Charles Wilson was the best player in college my bad I think it was the 1995 in LNVP that Barry Larkin won and Greg Maddox had I think a 140 ERA or something

is disgusting. I didn't know what ERA means. That's how much of a baseball fan I am not. He wasn't giving up runs ever. Greg Maddox was nice. Greg Maddox is one of the five to seven best pitchers of all time, somewhere in that range.

I know I got into it on Twitter once with Kurt Schilling. That doesn't surprise me at all. Greg Maddox. Greg Max 95, 19 and 2 with a 163 ERA in 210 innings. Barry Lark and hit 319 with 15 homers and 66 RBIs. How many homers?

15. 66 RBIs. Correct. Dante Bichette actually. He was leading off, wasn't he? Yeah, probably. But Dante Bichette also hit 340 with 40 homers, 128 RBIs. Everyone below him, the next like six guys were better.

I mean, there are a lot of people who love to post the graphic of like, The year, Wilt averaged 50. I think Oscar Robertson was averaging a triple double. Elgin Baylor was going crazy that year. And Bill Russell still won MVP. And that was the correct choice to make. So seven interceptions and zero touchdown in 1997. Okay, he had seven interceptions, right?

He had almost 200 yards receiving, over 100 yards rushing. He also had, I don't know how many. part returns for touchdowns. Like, what do you mean? He was clearly the best player in the country. He scored. I think he had like a school, a school breaking record.

I just read that, but he had school breaking record past breakups. I definitely just read that. Because I can't say, kind of a slam. I don't have that one just floating around on the brain. His offensive contributions were, were nothing.

He had 231 receiving yards, 15 rushing yards, and three touchdowns from scrimmage. How is 200 yards? it's insignificant you explain that to me in a season how explain how it's insignificant like explain that so that's 8 17 18 yards a game yeah if you're doing the average for sure but like they didn't get that anywhere no but he they put him on a field for impact plays they they put in packages for him it wasn't like he was he was he was he called 11 passes and 11 games and how but do you

defensive coordinators spent a week thinking about it. Like, you have to account for that, right? Not only that, you have to think about his punt returns, right? He scored, he scored, he scored, didn't he, he did the Heism, when he did the Heisman pose, it was against Ohio State, right? So it was like a big time moment, big time game. That's the type of shit that happens. Like, it is what it is.

Like, to call him garbage or trash on, on a season where not a lot of players went both ways. And that was like one of the, you know what I mean? Like, come on, bro. Like, you're out. He was nowhere near Peyton Manning. had had that level of production for four years at that time. Payton Manning has never had that level of production.

What are you talking about? He has never went both ways. 30 and 100 yards, 36 touchdowns, 11 picks. That's what's the step? Did he play defense? Did he play special teams? Like, what are you talking about? Did they win the Natch?

Charles Witson's contributions on offense were minimal. Huh? Did they win the Natch? You're minimizing. The next year with who? No, it was T. Martin. I wouldn't pay Manny. Correct.

Well, the team was better. Sounds like the quarterback was better. I can't go say that. It's not better. It was so much better. Why didn't he win a national championship? I mean, there's a lot of great players that don't win national championships. But we're talking, didn't fucking Charles Woodson won one or no?

Did he? Michigan didn't win that, did they? Did they win in 97? I thought they might have. five, not 95. I thought they won one while he was there. I could be wrong. I'm not the biggest college football guy.

I think they did in 97. But this is back when national championships didn't count, though. 19 teams won over a year. That's when Tennessee won all their championships. No, no, no, no, no, fake news. 98, first BCS. Big Blue's annual contest against Ohio State served the defensive back, Heisman-Kinching performance.

Woodson delighted the fans. and the Heisman pundance with a touchdown punt return and an end zone reception and a 37-yard catch that helps set up Michigan's only offensive touchdown at a game. Like, come on, dog, what do you mean? And the biggest. So he scored two of his three touchdowns in the season in one game, so the rest of the time he was doing nothing. That's not true. When you talk about defensive players, no news is good news.

Yo, put the dog down. Also, she beat a bad dog. That's when you put them down. They start getting the deer zombie disease. You got to put them down. If we really want to talk about the true person who was robbed in that Heisman ceremony, it was clearly Randy Jean Moss, who shattered Jerry Rice's records and made Marshall their first year, I believe in D1, a legitimate program.

With those giant shoulder pads, it's amazing how fast Randy Moss was able to run wearing those looked like they weighed 40 pounds easy. I tell you, growing up, one of the most intimidating things I've ever been a part of was watching 90s football and college football when them dudes, like LeVar Arrington or, you know what I'm saying, like them, the Florida State defenses where the shoulder pads was like this. And I'm like, now I'll never be that big. And I never was because the shoulder pads were proportionate by the time I got the colors.

And even when I think when I got to college, it was still a little big. I mean, when if you had the Earl Campbell shoulder pads, Aaron, like, You guys probably beat the Patriots a couple of times. Like, not a question of mine, those things were fucking massive. I just flipped up. I just looked up Randy Moss's numbers from 1997. He finished fourth. He was better than Charles Woodson.

We both agreed with that. Yeah, that's what I just said. That's a player of all. Charles Woodson should have been third at best. No, you're discounting his special teams contribution. You're also discounting his past breakups. You're also counting the fact that he was a defensive. prowess like in order like like that's like saying dwell rivas like the year he at 2010 right

he had like four interceptions but dog nobody threw to him they couldn't it was rivas island so i'm not saying he was cad he's the third best player in the country out of 130 times 100 like what's that 13000 players i'm sorry bro when you involved in all three sides of the game like you're on another level like at a d1 that's just that doesn't happen Like, you're bugging. You got a little, uh, you got a little, uh, you got a little, uh, bias going on here. Everybody out there. Yes, I am biased, but I'm also correct.

Everyone who, I love that. That's, that's, that's big T in a nutshell. Uh, yes, I am biased, but I'm also correct. You can be biased. Those aren't mutually exclusive. Yeah. No, no, they're not. I agree.

I, I definitely agree. Uh, so look at those pictures I just said. Everybody at home, Google Lavaar Arrington shoulder pads and look at his college pictures. It's insane how big they were. Holy shit, this guy was scary. The LeVar Leap, all-time play. It was so unnecessarily big. I feel like you wouldn't be able to lift your hands above your head.

How would you ever make an interception wearing their shoulder pads? So big. All right, that is macrodosing. Everybody have a happy and safe holiday. However you choose to celebrate, I'm going to be going home to Virginia. I think Big T's already. You're back in Tennessee, aren't? aren't you?

I mean COVID protocols. There you go. And Mad Dog is, are you in Ohio? No, I leave tonight. My flight's at 10 p.m. tonight.

So I'm heading back tonight. Cool. All right. Well, we will see guys later. Have a good rest of the week. And we love all you guys out there. Love you guys.

I don't know.