Macrodosing: Arian Foster and PFT Commenter - NANODOSE: Statute of Limitations

Episode Date: March 10, 2022

On today's episode of Nanodosing (Snackrodosing, Minidosing, Lil' Macro, etc.), the crew talks about things they did when they were younger that was illegal. Make sure to tune into Macrodosing, every Tuesday at 7am EST.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/macrodosing

Hey, macrodosing listeners. You can find us every Tuesday and Thursday on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon music. All right, it's nanodosing. Whole crew minus Coley's here. Coley's got like his daughter's birthday or something like that that he's celebrating, like a simp. But we got Arian back, and we got some stuff to clean up from Tuesday's show. I feel like, I feel like nanodosing, for the most part, could be mostly just Billy apologizing

and correcting all the mistakes that he made on Tuesday. So I have three corrections if we want to hear them. Well, we can get into that in a second. First of all, I want to welcome Avery back. Avery was gone. I'm back. He's back from Russia. How's the Don Bosch region?

It's good there. The foods get actually pretty good, but they're starting to cut things off there. No Coca-Cola anymore. No McDonald's. No McDonald's. That's actually huge. It's huge. So now that actually, no, it's bad because now we can fight a war against them because they don't

have McDonald's anymore. No, McDonald's is a big one there. So in 1990, January 30th. 31st, 1990, the first McDonald's opened in Moscow and had a line two miles long. Today, there's a line to one of the last McDonald's open that's about a mile long. And there's a resale market of McDonald's. You have full meals going for about $100 in ruples and like Coca-Cola, like large Coca-Cola's going for about $11 worth of ruples. That's sick. I actually did the calculations because because everyone's saying, they're selling this for $500 worth of Ruples.

But I was like, hey, buddy, if you haven't checked the Ruples and shambles right now, it's only actually $100 worth of Ruples. You buddyed them. You buddyed the anonymous people online. That'd be very funny to smuggle a bunch of McDonald's over into Russia right now. Those companies still proudly doing business in China, by the way. Who is? All the companies that are cutting off their things in Russia.

That's, it would be way too expensive. The population difference. Big T, to be fair, like China. Yes, they're doing a lot of very, very bad things, but they're not like actively invading another country. Sure. But like if we're going to, if you're cutting off starting a war. If if you're going to stop doing business with war criminals, like be consistent. Well, you know, let's get away.

I'm guilty of this. We're war criminals. Yeah. Okay. So be consistent. Well, you can't. That's the thing. If you want to.

Yeah, I think we agree. We agree. That's what I say is capital is riddled in hypocrisy. but we're we're about optics here we want to look good to the people like the NFL I I think yeah I think I agree yeah has anyone been to a European McDonald's I have are it's honestly the quality is insane the best the better one in my opinion was the one I went to Japan oh I I can't speak for Japanese McDonald's but bro that shit was I was like I want to see how it it's just they care so much there like what

What do they serve at a Japanese McDonald's? Do they have like burgers and stuff? Yeah, it's the same shit. But it's like the quality, they just care more. Like, just like they just care. Everything is just, they just care. That's the best way I can put it. I mean, it just tastes like McDonald's, but it was like, it just felt more quality.

How cool would that be breakfast stuff? It'd be awesome if they made like a Wagyu, like Big Mac over there. They might have, you know, they probably have it. Yeah. It's crazy when you travel the different places, how different the food is from here in terms of like portions. size and you just really see why everybody else is skinny compared to the United States. You know what's the craziest thing

I heard? Subway is the largest chain in the world. Yeah. Like there's Subways everywhere across the world. I never knew that. I guess the way their supply chain is very easy. Deli meets and bake the bread there. Subway is like very

I don't want to say it's bad but it's trash. It's disgusting. I mean, support local delis. Yeah, support local delis. Yeah, it's not bad Like I can eat Subway if I have to But it's trash Yeah

I think it's the most trash food What do you think of the smell of Subway? Love the smell of Subway I mean deli meat in itself Is filled with nitrates, sodium Bad things to start with But like I accept that But to make fast food deli meat

Almost sounds like Like what's in the meat And I think that like I just feel bad whenever I go into a subway Because The people that typically work at Subway They just always seem like they're having the worst time like they hate they have to wear the sandwich artist pin and you know that it's no fun for them. They don't like there's nothing joyful about going into it. I almost feel bad. It's one of the most popular jobs in the Metaverse. Is it? To work at a subway. You have paid pretty well there. Because it's a Walmart subsidiary, I think. Okay. And Walmart's really pushing for Metaverse stuff. So like you can work. You have to work in the Metaverse? Yeah. Fuck that.

Dude, I was in the Metaverse two days ago in a bar fight, and I fucked everybody up. Do you have to go to jail in the Metaverse? I never got sent to deal because I beat up the cops. Can you play, okay, can you play, can you put on a VR headset? The video's coming. It's hilarious. In the Metaverse. And then go into a second Metaverse? Honestly, the Metaverse hasn't really been connected yet.

There's just a bunch of Metaverse programs that you can't really, you got to just do separate stuff. My issue with the Metaverse is that you sweat in the Metaverse. Like you're sweating in the act of being in the metaverse. Oh, I do the boxing too. I have it. I bought the Oculus. It's the coolest thing ever. You feel like you're just not even where you are.

But I'm like sweating doing the boxing. I shouldn't have to feel like physical agony. I agree. I agree. The whole point of the Metaverse, in my opinion, would be to just have good stuff happen. Yes. But apparently you have to like go to work. You have a boss in the Metaverse.

Yeah. You have to like do chores when you get home. It sounds awful Dude honestly A boxing simulator Like with the Oculus and everything Would honestly I'd buy that

I mean like I hit the bag today And it gets a little boring If you could simulate sparring Without the actual Like getting hit That would be one of the best workouts Like Jerry got the golf plus And he got a knee sprain

In real life Playing golf plus Do you go to the hospital in the mid-averse? That's a good question I don't know. Can you be, like, riddled with medical debt and have to declare bankruptcy in the metaverse? For sure.

Jesus. Sounds awful. So going back real quick to the whole, like, sanctions, the capitalism sanctions against Russia that we're doing right now. Have we reached the point in this crisis where you porn and porn hub just cut off all access to Russia? There was a rumor that that happened like a week ago, but it wasn't true. You can access it through VPNs anyway.

We need to do that. We need to get to that. that if they shut down porn hub i guarantee there will be the second russian revolution shut down porn hub uh close all the bridges so that nobody can do walking videos on them where a bunch of teenagers do pull-ups and shit from the top of them yeah uh drop one of those uh electromagnetic pulses which shorts out all the taxi cab dashboard cameras that they have yeah as far as i'm concerned like that's what russia does they just in last on the list is revolution it's like once you eliminate all their favorite things

Then their last favorite thing, which is revolution happens. Yep. But yeah, so it's good to have everybody back, minus, minus Coley. We do need to figure out time to get together and do the Constitution episode. Yeah, true. So let's put our heads together on that one. And for all those out there that were taking bets on when Billy would give me my supplements that I asked for on Monday, I was right. Thursday morning, the supplements were on my desk.

I actually had it in my bag. I did it Monday night, but it was in my bag for two days. So when did I get the supplements today? Okay. But they were in the office. No, I was confused when you said, you made it seem for a second like you had actually given them to be on Monday. And I was like, wait. It's not like a kid that like I had my homework done.

I just forgot it was in my. That was a huge problem for me. Yeah, he used one of them kids. They used to stuff papers in the bag, didn't you? No, it was how do those, do you see those memes? How do those kids who stuffed papers in their bag? How are they doing? Like, this is how I'm doing.

Yeah. This is how I'm doing. I was absolutely one of those kids, too. Like, I would find them all crumpled up at the bottom. Like, looking, oh, my God, looking for the worksheet in your bag when your teacher's like, where's your homework? I'm getting, like, butterflies just thinking about that. Yeah, you start to sweat.

You probably turn red. I did it. You turn red, I bet. No one believes that you did it. I'm like, I swear, I even remember question number this. No one believes you. Question number this. You get detention.

I was never, I couldn't stuff it in. I had, like, OCD when I was. comes of shit like that like everything had to be neat but I was never I was always like procrastinated like I was I would do it on the way to school or like right before school I'm you know I'm copy of homework and shit like that I was one of those kids honestly one of the best things about the iPhone living the iPhone generation was you could start essays or like short answer questions on the bus on the way home just typing texting yeah that was a cheat code for me that was huge all right well to school in that era yeah really I also have I have

have your supplements here. I brought the concrete. Oh, great exchange. So concrete, they're one of our sponsors on Tuesdays. Uh, their creatine, Billy has been like absolutely dying to get his hands on some more of this stuff. Because I wasn't going to buy it myself. And now he's just, he's jamming a pen into the, into the container and just ripping it open. Well, I do a line of that. I'm not, I'm not going to use them properly. I'm going to put one scoop, but I'm going to go two scoops. Okay. Um, so Billy's going to do this. corrections as well because I guess he made he made a couple errors yeah so first things first arian I think you can help me with this but we were talking about why jordan davis is projected

as like the 19th pick while aden hutchinson's projected as the first pick jordan davis had an amazing draft showing and everyone was like billy what do you mean he can't run off the field in time and he's not fast enough to get off the field after he just ran a four seven nine this is what i was trying to say and now i have the stats to back it up aden hutchinson had about 800 snaps in his whole college career four years in Michigan that equals something around like 450 snaps a season hang hang on you said he played 800 snaps in four years yeah that that can't be 400 snaps a season that's 450 wait 800 snaps in 4 years 1800 1800 I was adding $1,000 to it

I was going to say 800 Snaps is one year I'm pretty sure I said 1800 We're going to have to do a Friday episode Where it's Billy correcting his correct I said 1800 No you didn't

I said 1800 We're all right Billy we're all right here Okay everyone Okay So what I was saying is Jordan Davis had 192 snaps Yep

So Ayn Hutchinson is on the field for longer He has a better motor in what I'm saying but couldn't Jordan Davis that just shows that he is able to sprint off the field because he does it more often I'm just check made

there we go Aiden Hutchinson is always on the field he never has to run to the sideline but that was in the main state of my point I was saying the reason why Agent Hutchinson is a higher draft pick is because he's able to stay on the field more that was my only point because Jordan Davis can't maintain right D tackles are like

these tackles aren't usually three down players right like they the line shuffles in and a lot of the times the ends aren't either

right it's rare the ends are three down players like especially like the prime of their career they will be right but then towards the end they just come in on like second third down like one guy plays arguably

the second most important position on the field and the other does not right so that was all I was saying but it has nothing to do would you agree that Jordan Davis, even though he's so fast, so athletic, so large, that his performance may deteriorate

over the course of usage because his endurance might not be the highest. Why do you say his endurance is high? Because I literally can't find a fault with this player and he has to have low endurance or he's literally a superhuman. That shit is a horrible logic. I know, but like, I don't think Jordan Davis could play as many snaps as like Ayn Hutchinson. That was my only point. Do you realize, I hate to bring race into this, but do you realize you did like the quintessential like, like, okay, well, how they, how they, how they, how they, how they, how they, how they, it's a joke.

Like, it was a joke between all of us, right? It's a joke. Joke was with black dudes when they come out, listen to how they talk about black dudes when they come out. It's always like they're super athletic, freak of nature. And when it's white cast, they're always high motor guys, highly intelligent. Well, Aiden Hutchinson's, but you said it. You said he's a high motor guy. It's funny.

Motor is definitely more, it's absolutely on the list of those words. Like, I remember when Chris Long was coming out. It's like this guy is a motor guy. He does not quit. Coach on the field. Student of the game. But I would say, high IQ. Aaron Donald, I'd say Aaron Donald is a high motor guy.

High IQ. you, Vaughn Miller, another high-boater guy. You got to be at a bunch of black friends. I know, I'm just saying you used. I'm not just saying you, it's just funny. I'm not, that is not, that is not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, damning you, my gee. I was just funny.

But, no, I think the dude is, is insanely, I mean, he's, right, he's, he's, he's an athlete. So it's like, I don't know that, that any, anything can, can deteriorate a career. Usage, there's a whole bunch of different factors. And so, like, that's why I hate drafts and, scouts and the combine is a horse show anyway i never liked it and we never really paid much attention to it like when you're in the league so i i think that it's fair to say that you don't know how he's going to translate to the next level because you don't know how anybody is but in his case he's you know he did get cycled in and out of the game so you don't know what his

endurance going to be like you don't know if he's going to be able to play every down or if he if he's going to be in a position on whatever team he gets drafted by to play every down but he's been he's been pretty fucking good. Yeah. My second correction, by the way, this concrete tastes amazing. It's flavored. My second correction was regarding how I was talking about a lot of youth hockey players who are righties are now being taught to play as lefties.

Avery, maybe can comment to this because using a left-handed stick, their right hand is actually holding the stick more rather than their dominant hand before the way a typical righty would play, the stick would actually be in his left hand more. This was something I heard. Is that something you've heard, Avery? No, yeah, for sure. I actually, I've seen it more now than ever. And I've also noticed that they're trying to develop more, like they want the balance to be almost even,

especially in defensemen, because it's hard to find a lefty and righty defenseman. Like, there's not as much disparity, right? And it's funny because when I grew up playing, a lot of the, like, Canadian players would be lefty. versus Americans, a lot of them are righties. Yeah. So, this is just people are getting angry in my mentions about. And this third one, I'm actually the most sorry because I didn't explain it correctly. Sturgeon.

I like, I like Billy's sorry power rankings. I'm the most sorry about messing up the fact about fish. We need a sorry meter. Free a story meter. I said that Sturt, I said Sturgeon were only, I made. I made it sound like I said surgeon were only local to the Great Lakes. What I meant is the gigantic surgeon, like the ones that set huge records, I think the largest sturgeon have been found in the Great Lakes. I know there's Sturgeon in the Hudson.

I know there's Sturgeon down Florida, Oregon, all around, but some of the largest record-breaking sturgeon were found either in the Great Lakes, Great Lake tributaries, resounding rivers. So what I was saying was those gigantic record-breaking sturgeon, I don't know what the exact sub-speech he is, but you could imagine in this giant great lake in Russia that's bigger than a lot of the other great lakes, there might be some even gigantic or sturgeon. A lot of the sturgeon in those other locales that people are like, we have sturgeon in my river, and then they're like five sturgeon in Oregon, those sturgeon aren't as big as some of the sturgeon found around Lake Michigan, Lake Superior.

So that's what I was saying. So I'm sorry that I, you know, wrote off other state sturgeon. And that's the one that you're most, that's the one that you're most sorry about. I'm sorry if I disrespected the fish that live near Minnesota. But I think Billy's right, though. There might be some gigantic or sturgeon in Lake Picau. Think about it.

It's the deepest lake in the world. Fresh water. Fresh water. It's a glacial lake, bitch. Prehistoric fish. I noticed that there was no correction regarding the gallbladder. Oh, yes. That was actually the fourth on my list.

I forgot about that. The gallbladder is not a gland. It's an organ. Wait, it's an organ? Yes, it's not in Oregon. It's an organ. Okay. And sturgeon.

Yeah. All right. Well, thank you for your corrections, Billy. these corrections were brought you by concrete currently sipping it it's amazing okay i love i love billy's corrections because he he invariably has to make further corrections regarding his previous corrections um but that's why we love him on the show i hold myself accountable he does when you guys come at me and say this was wrong this is wrong i want to just hopefully correct my wrong you know what maybe the segment can just be called like who's mad at billy this week the sturgeon people

Sturgeon Twitter got Hockey Twitter Sturgeon Twitter got Real upset at Billy this week I imagine there's a sturgeon Twitter out there Keep sending me pictures of the sturgeon you've caught Because some people have sent Monster sturgeons they've caught

I might put the blog together Um Aryan On Tuesday's show You probably didn't listen right I did not On Tuesday's show we all pulled out our phones And Aver you can do this too

And we just popped up the First thing that came up on TikTok To check our algorithms Just to get a base of what everybody's algorithm thinks about them so curious to know what's going on with you guys um I just watched you scroll yeah I just watched you scroll you it's someone who I follow so it's like okay that doesn't count right well no but is it someone you personally know for you is it someone you personally know no it's

someone I follow okay then what you follow this guy TikTok daddy he's like uh he's he's he just got like a i mean he's like a jewish guy and he just like videos his son and his son is just not about it is his son the extremely religious one yes i love him i love him so much it's just it's a really weird name but i follow him because it's what was the second one she on your list the second one um i can't say that yes yes let me see it let me see it and i'll let me see it and then Okay. Let me see it. This is terrible podcast.

No, he's right. He's right. No, let me see. He's right. Whisper it. He's right. We'll talk all fair.

Yeah. Whisper it. Okay. Is it like... Aaron, what's yours? So, hold on. What popped up for me was somebody that I follow already.

All right. So not somebody that you follow. Just I want to know what the algorithm thinks about it. oh it said it's some dude is that a commercial he said you don't need a scanner or dokey sign if you have an iPhone and he's showing you how to

oh that's an ad it's a commercial so the algorithm thinks that you're a capitalist no this isn't a this isn't a commercial i don't think that's an ad this is a dude like showing like some iPhone hack that like Like, I don't know. I will say my first one was TikTok Daddy's second one I can't say. But third one was macrodosing. So I just pulled mine up to see what it would. And it's JFK.

My second one is Rihanna. It's JFK getting killed by the CIA. Copyright, copyright. The TikTok woman that I told you guys about, the Jewish woman, she DM'd me on Instagram. Oh, really? Oh, wow. She found my Instagram. I was like, thanks for shouting me out on macrodosing.

I love Barstool. Tell her, tell her sup, tell her to come on the show. Tell her sup. She lives in Long Island. Wait, what's her thing again? I know that you had, she was your number one Jewish mother. She's my number one Jewish mother. She talks about being an Orthodox Jewish woman and like what she makes for Shabbas every week and how she has to use like warmers because she can't use electricity and how people have to turn lights on for them because they can't turn on lights.

Oh, Shabbas Goy. I used to be a Shabbas Goy. What's that mean? Shabbos Goy is the Gentile who turns on the lights. I used to do that there was a Oh like a helper Yeah Yeah

Or if like a non-Jewish Yeah Person to turn off the lights at the temple That sounds That sounds like The start of a porn movie It's like I heard you need some help Turn it on your light

Yeah but she she found She found my Instagram And she DMed me And it was like hey Madeline Wait wait Wait I am confused You You turn on these people's lights for them

What do you mean So I used to shovel snow The people who were observing So there was a rabbi I grew up when I was younger, when I lived in the city, I grew up, like, down the street from a temple. And the rabbi there, my dad always used to, like, when you're literally like, you shovel snow for money because that's like one of your first entrepreneurial type jobs. So my father told me, go down to the, you know, like telling me good spots to shovel snow, like to go ask people they need their driveway shoveled. This is what I used to do on snow days.

So I went down to the temple. and I was like, hey, do you need your driveway shoveled? And it was an older gentleman who ran the temple. I'm not sure if he was the rabbi or the keeper of the place. And he goes, yeah, 100%. And he's like, I also have a job for you if you want. Come every Friday, Saturday, the Shabbas, and turn off our lights at the end of the day

and come in the morning to turn them on because they can't use electricity. Yeah, but they can have like other people. Yeah. So I was the Shabbas Goy. Yeah. That's interesting. She tells me all about that kind of stuff. They were on a cruise recently.

She told me how to do Shabbas on a cruise. So there's all these little workarounds. Got it. Anyway, it was one of my first jobs. How much you get paid for that? It was very minimal. Yeah. Wait, did your dad take your money?

No. Was this like a McCulley Colkin, you need to emancipate yourself? How much money does your father owe you for stealing your wage? My dad actually owns my kidney. Okay. I lost it to a bet with him when I was younger. How old? Well, I was like very young and I was like, I have no money, but like I made a bet with

him and he was like, okay, I'll give you like $50 against your kidney. And I was like, yeah, like I'm totally going to win this bet. I lost the bet. He owns my kidney now. That's pretty cheap. He was oxen enough of a kidney pretty cheap. Right. But I was like eight and I had no value of the kidney.

Yeah. But it's not even one of his favorite organs. Yeah. Now my dad always holds it over me. He's like, look, this is, it was a learning experience. He owes my kidney. And I honestly think. In some messed up way, he's going to need a kidney transplant one day.

And I'm definitely going to give him my kidney. It's just like, that's how karma works. What about your soul? Have you bet your soul yet? No. You can always go to that one. I don't know. How much do you think your soul is worth, Big Tee?

How much could I pay you right now for you to sell me your soul? I don't believe there's a monetary value assigned to it. $100,000. No, that's like not even. There is, I don't, there's no amount of money, but that that was an insulting offer. What did you expect? I mean, that's like not a lot of money. Have you guys ever listened to My Darling by Eminem?

No. When he talks about selling a soul? My darling. Yeah, I love that song. Your soul in this scenario where you can exchange it for money should be like a life-altering amount of money. I'm asking. A life-like. All I'm asking you for is to say, yes, I am hereby selling you my soul.

and then you sign a contract. I'm not talking about like any ramifications that might exist in the afterlife or whatever. I'm talking about doing this right here, right now. How much money for you to write down on a piece of paper? We'll have it notarized so it's legal. Okay. It's binding.

$100,000 essentially just for you to sign a piece of paper. Is this an offer from you right now? It could be. Is it? It could be. We may have accidentally sold our souls. Like, wait, Billy, you're killing the momentum of this negotiation. I know, but you're not going to sell a soul.

He just went from no amount of money to now asking buying questions. Well, no, no, no. It wouldn't be for $100 grand. $100,000 would not get it done. But are you making real offers? I could be. Are you really considering this?

For way more than $100,000. Way more. Yeah. $200,000. Yeah, no, like I'm, I will sell myself for $100,000. I'm in it. I think you already sold your soul, Aaron. That's what's up.

I'm trying to get this $100,000. We're heading. I knew Aaron would be in for it because, like, it's just writing your name on a piece of paper. Those, yeah, I don't think, I don't think a soul is a thing. And I also don't think that you could say, like, I don't think that the soul, as it might exist to some people, would be any way, like, reliant or, uh, observant of contracts written. See, I, I think I agree. Yeah. I think I agree. But then, like, if I got up to heaven and God was like, man, I hope that 100K was worth it. because that would be like absolutely

which is why which is why a hundred grand is not worth the risk so well it's interesting because you're you're you're comparing that to like a material possession here on earth would that be worth experiencing uh disappointment in the afterlife but it sounds like you're saying that it would be but it's just a matter of degrees no no no no no no if there is

there might be an amount of money that's worth the risk now if you still ended up in hell forever, then it obviously would not be worth it. But if it really was just signing your name to a piece of paper and then you were fine, then maybe it was worth the risk. Well, that's what... So if you're, if you end up going through this transaction, though, you're kind of admitting that you don't really believe in the afterlife. No, that's not what I said at all.

Because if you really, really truly did, then there actually would be no amount of money. Correct, which is what I started this whole thing by saying. But then you've come off that a little bit. No, no, no, I said I, no, that's not true. The numbers haven't gone up to a, to a, an acceptable amount. But what I said was, I think I agree with you that, that God would not be like you, you signed a piece of paper to PFT saying he has your soul now. I'm powerless to stop this. Right.

This is a matter for the courts, New York State. Right. It's like King Triton and Ursula. He tries to shoot it down and it's binding. So, there we go. I didn't, I didn't know that we were going to go there to, to, to. some Ursula college Yeah you remember

Little Mermaid's classic I just watched it with my kids too And he and he signed the contract Or Ariel signed the contract And he tried to take his little Triton and destroy the paper But it was it was airtight Damn

Before we before we get going today Let's just How about let's rank Our best Disney movies Because I was getting into a conversation About this the other day And Little Mermaid thing brought her up Whatbell?

Can I get one more point about the souls? Yes Yeah, you told me I sold my soul. So I want to hear that bullshit. No, no, yeah. So remember the song, My Darling by Eminem where he's literally like talking to the devil, I think. And he's like, remember you sold your soul, may I remind you? Remember that night you said you'd give anything if Dre signed you?

Well, I forget the rest of the way cooler than that. Yeah, you said that deep auto tune voice. And I was like, wait, what if that's selling your soul where you're like, I'll do anything if I can get this one thing? Even like if it was a fleeting thought, what if like that's selling your show? Like what if the reason I'm here working at parcel of sports because I inadvertently sold my soul at some point wishing to get the job and that's how this is all happening. So we can subconsciously sell your soul? Yeah, I think so. How?

Just like wishing for material desire. I think you should know more about that commitment if that's all it takes. I think I think that's it. You could also say like you're selling your soul by living the lifestyle. that you do by not attending church every day, by not observing Shabbats. By being a lay person.

Yeah. So you went to pearly gates and God sends you to hell. Sir, unbeknownst to me, I didn't know that this was the day. Yeah, no, I think a lot of religions think that that's possible. And I mean, it's also fair to say Billy's soul to soul the moment you touched a light switch on Saturday. Yeah. Many people would say that

you were, you know, you're getting paid but to break God's law but Jewish people don't believe in hell right they believe in I don't think they believe in Perg I think they believe and this is actually really sad

that we've got a bunch of people like we're doing the equivalent of mansplaining Judaism with the Jewish person no one here is oh Avery you're Jewish right yeah you're Jewishish yeah is Jewish I'm half I didn't have a bar mitzvah

so what is the Jewish explanation. I thought it was a bot mitzvah. It depends on if it's a girl or a boy. Bot mitzvah's for a girl. Oh, but then there's benign mitzvah, which is for twins. That's weird. Benign.

Benign. Benai, be, let me look this up. All right, Billy's going to have another people. He's going to have to apologize to. I think as a Semitic Billy. My understanding is that, my understanding is that Jews people believe that the rapture is yet to come. And so after they die, It's kind of like an in-between state, and then eventually they'll be taken to Paradise.

I think, I don't know. I don't know about the Paradise part, but I do know that most Jewish people don't believe in the classical definition of hell. Yeah. I think that's what Melendez's told me. So under the list of bar mitzvah songs, it goes bar mitzah dance, bar mitzvah boy, and then it goes, don't stop the party by Pitbull. I got a feeling by Black Eye Peace. We should get Jake in here. I got a feeling.

Wow. um that was that was a nice time when that was hold on bro you got to tell me how i sold myself i don't know like yeah like wishing to play in the nfl like i'd give anything to like get signed i'd give anything like just like thinking that so any aspiration you obtained is telling yourself i don't know that's what the m&m song made it sound like got you so i'm basing my religious beliefs off of a five foot six angry guy yelling into a microphone i can so see billy like starting some weird religious movement what why no i don't i think billy could be a religious leader i think he'd definitely be like an early adopter of a new religion like more money as a leader have

more fun as a follower there you go billy would be uh i don't yeah i don't plan on starting any cults you big tea that's a nice little quote there man you know what that's from right i don't oh it's from the office oh you know what's creed rat so um actually instead doing the Disney thing. I just want to do one last check in with Big T because we have a friend who's back in the office now. His name's Rico. Yeah, why are we doing this? Should we just run up on him with the mic right now and be like, yo, apologize. And he no, no, Billy, calm down. Well, actually, no, I'm glad we're doing this. I'm glad we're doing this. I'm glad we're doing this because we had we had a bit of a discussion in the group chat last night where Billy was apparently trying to get

Rico to come on this show today and like apologize or whatever. Billy can't do that. because Billy, Billy and Rico don't have a relationship. Sure, sure, but he wanted you to do that, I guess. Yeah, I can, I can talk to Rico. Had you seen his tweet from the other day before I sent it? I had not seen that. So does that make you think, oh, maybe I was a dumb ass for saying like, oh, he's changed in three weeks?

I didn't say that he's changed. I said that he's gone to counseling. Would that make you change your mind that he wanted to apologize? He's told me that he would not be opposed to apologize. And his actions say otherwise, do they not? Well, just because he, how do you know he was talking? talking about you with the Braves thing. Oh, dude,

shut the fuck up. It's true, no. What's his favorite baseball team? What's his favorite baseball team? The Mets. If he wanted to apologize, there is nothing precluding him

from doing that. He's clearly still a piece of shit, and I have no interest in... That's fighting words, though. You got to watch that shit, though. Dude, I actually think it's... If it ain't...

If it ain't beef, you got to stop talking like that. If it ain't... What do you mean? No, it most definitely. Billy is. I despise him. Go holl at him then. No do say it on the pocket. Go holl at him. Keep that shit under the tape.

Everybody's part of the Skellaban in this room, right? Skellaband? No. But you're a rider? Yeah. What? What are you talking about? What is the scalaband? The skellaban is a group of anti-riders. It's pretty much just Billy and like I think I'm in it by default.

And everyone he's blocked. We have a sign up sheet. Aaron, you ever like, you ever been around somebody that started a club in like second grade? Oh, I did. We did. Clubs, yeah, that's what Billy's done. No, no, Rico created the first club. I created the second club. DGP.

We called a DGP. What's DGP? It's destroying government property. We were the second grade, every recess, we would go. Our playground was huge. Well, back then it was. I don't know how big it is now. But we would go out to this far corner and there was like this little cubby and had a little cover on it.

We would just go in there and tag on the wall and sit. DGP. That's a cool name for a gang. Can we admit to crimes we did that when we were younger, we're definitely illegal, but now we probably wouldn't be used in... Yeah. All right.

Statute of limitations. So that was Ariens. What's yours, Big T? I'm a rule follower for the most part. Yeah. You've definitely broken law, though. You ever spray-painted anything? You ever...

I don't think I've ever spray-painted, like, not only something you weren't supposed to spray-painted. I don't think I've ever used spray paint in my life. You've definitely driven over 10 miles an hour over the speed limit. Probably not. Repent. No. Repent.

I'm trying to think if I've done something illegal. I mean, jay walked. There you go. And New York has gotten me in a bad habit of jaywalking, like real bad, because now I go back to Nashville and like I don't give a shit. So I committed manslaughter in the summer of 2004. Okay. Even as a joke, probably not something.

I'd say. No, there was a, there was a little. By the way, Billy was like three at the time. Five. No, there was this machine that used to give out scratch cards and it was right by the door of this place. So if you had like a $5 bill, ran in, put the $5 bill in, hit the button, had it spit out, grab it, run out in time before the guy at the counter like saw you. That was a pretty easy way to get scratch cards on your age. The hard part was cash in the mouth. if you want if you win what can you do you have to find somebody and then pay them a cut yeah interesting uh i sold drugs for six no four months in college just strictly to finance a kegarator that i wanted to buy i want to make enough money and profit until i could purchase the kegarator and then i was out and mission accomplished i helped sell drugs man just like mid grade just mid grade marijuana just bad bad pot oh bring no bring it back

that's a that's a that's a that's a movement bring back mid yeah man i had a buddy who sold weed in college and i had to make a couple of runs from because he was out of town and uh to uh to to reward myself i used to still shake from the bottom of his bag if shake is just like the shit that falls off. But I told him about it. I didn't still, it was the homer. And it's just the best, I guess the best, I don't know, that was the best high I've ever had. Like mid mid, mid is, it's like, you know, it's not, it's not, Reggie, but it's like just above Reggie. And it's not the shit. It's not fucking crap. Do you hear a horror story? Can we put that on a t-shirt? What? Bring back mids? Yeah, absolutely. We should. I feel like that would sell.

Bring back mids. Let's put on a shirt. And also let's just bring back kids. What do we plan? Yeah, we can do it. This will be my first contribution to merch. because y'all merches be not merching for me. Okay. Bring back men's shirt because we dropped the ball and the other one that I won't. You know what I'm saying? All right.

Well, no, no, no. It's cool. I wanted to sell. I don't think it did. I don't think it did, but it's all right. I swear to God, I send it to our merch people. Let's not put it on the big dog. You know what I mean?

It's just keep it to Eric. I mean. I sent it to our merch people. They sent me back in design. And they said, fuck off, man. We're not. No. And then by the time that we got.

around to figure out where the charity money was going to go from it. It was too late in the month since it was a short month. Lord Willing, this podcast still around? We'll preemptively do it. We'll sell it in January so that you can get it at the start so you'll have 28 days to wear it during

Black History Month. So, oh, he said it, I didn't say. Wait, is it 20 or 29 days? 20. Next year. It's 20 years. Yeah, but next year, I didn't know if it was a leap year or not. Oh. No. It'll be 2026. Last year was, that's crazy. My dad was born on February 28, but almost the leap year.

Yeah, that'd be great. He'd be like seven years old. Two years ago. Arian, when you say shake, I had, so I'm not very, you know, in tune with the vernacular of marijuana, but one time I found a grinder. And I always heard about shake. I was like, oh, shakes like the stuff at the bottom of the bag, right? So I found this grinder.

Not on a grinder, though. Right. So I'm on a grind. I find this, I find this grinder. I'm like, oh, man. I'm going to try to smoke some of this weed. There's no weed in it. And then I was like unscrewing it.

And I found this bottom compartment filled with all this little powder. I was like, oh, this must be the shake that they're talking about. Like, I'm just going to put a whole bowl full of shake in a little, little pipe. And I'm going to smoke it. And I'm just going to like get a little high and go to bed early and like, you know, eat stuff. So I was like, okay. So I'm out there like in a place that we'll find me. So I smoke a whole bowl full of this green powder that I think is shake.

Turns out it's something called. So I take. it and then watching Black Mirror on that looked me like oh man I'm doing stoner shit this is cool wait wait I feel like Billy just skipped like a CD used to skip back in the day except he just skipped in real life because you you literally

just go it turns out it wasn't weed after all it was something called and then he just moved on to the rest of the story that without saying what it was I know because it's it's called Keith yeah it gets you voting yeah that was the punch line because I forgot the part about where I was watching black and all of a sudden just being like oh my god these predator dogs

are really fucking scary I'm like what the hell and then like my heart's pounding out my chest turns out I smoked a bowl full of keef which is fucking not shake and it's like I was curled up in the fetal position just like scared that the robot dogs

were gonna get me okay all right it wasn't a good time Keith sounds like yeah it sounds pretty intense I don't think I ever smoke keef yeah we used to We used to put it like on a blunt. Like, so it's like a topic almost. So like you roll a blunt and then you put keep on it and it just intensifies the high.

Like that was when I was like a heavy smoker. Yeah. Damn. I mean, I never smoked the whole. They got something stronger than that caught a dab. Have you ever done a dab? I've not done a dab. I know what a dab is though.

Like I will never do that shit. I got a homie that does. Like he loves that shit, but like there's no fucking way. I mean, you remember that guy? You remember that guy, Ben, that came on or, are we? weed episode back on 420 last year i don't ben is a uh he's a great guy one of our good friends here maybe the biggest pothead that i've ever met in my life did julio no no buda ben buda ben yeah uh but yeah buda ben is maybe the biggest donor i say it with with uh all respect

in my heart i love buda ben but i went to this uh what was it called it was uh 420 on sacramento I think it's called like weed fest No, fuck, why can't I remember Probably because there's too much pot out there Anyways, it's like a massive cannabis Oh, the cannabis cup, there we go I think that's where it was So we go out there and they have all these tents set up

With people offering different types of marijuana That you can sample in different forms And Ben takes this giant dab They have like a dab machine there And this guy that smokes probably like I don't know 12 to 15 times a day I would estimate if not more and he hits the dab and then he just starts coughing and he just loses his mind

for about 30 seconds or a minute and then he comes back he's like that was awesome like he was even it was even so so powerful that it overpowered the strongest marijuana brain of all time i once i once was at like a party in high school and i just see like these dudes at a table outside and they're around this huge like rig like it looks like the only thing i could compare it to is like some sort of science experiment and I see one dude with a blow torch like what the hell's going on over there and I had no idea what they were doing could possibly like like why would you bring a blow torch to a party so I walk over there and they're just like I'm like what are you guys doing and I realized they were smoking a gigantic weird water bong with like three types of cooling systems because

the dabs make you cough so much and I may be wrong but isn't the dab originally from like you're coughing into your elbow and that's why it's like dab, dab, dab, because you're coughing so much? I don't know, but I doubted it, man. I think that's where it's, I mean, because dab.

I don't know. I don't know either, but I don't, I don't know. Yeah, that'd be funny though. I think it, I think it would. It could be. It's a possibility. All right, well, we got anything else we were running through today?

I thought we were going to do our Disney movie. We can, we can save that maybe. Okay. I feel like that's a good topic. That's a controversial topic Yeah, it is It's a good draft Have you seen the new Batman movie?

I've not seen the Batman no You saw it last night It's good What's the Avery Tomatoes ranking on it? I said it was like an 84% Like 8.4 out of 100 I thought it was really good Does it hold up with like the good Batman movie

Because I think like Batman's trash in general But like there's a hold up with the good Batman movie It's different The cast is really good I think Pattinson's a really good Batman but it's different. It doesn't have the same exact vibe to a Christian Bail Batman, but I think it's good.

I think it's worth seeing for sure. I'll check it out. Who's your favorite Batman overall? Christian Bale. Yeah. Yeah, it lights out. Not George Cleary. There's no good Batman. You don't think so? Batman ass, bro. No, not the movies. There's some good Batman movies, but like just the characters.

They're horrible superheroes. It's the worst one. He's just his powers. Well, he's not a superhero. White privilege. It's trash. Pretty much. Yeah. It's trash.

I mean, he's like a billionaire. I thought I said this on a podcast earlier, but it's like a billionaire who just fucking goes around. And instead of like helping people for real with his money, he just like beats up poor people trying to rob other poor people. It's just fucking amazing. Well, the Wayne Foundation does great work for golf. The Wayne Foundation, you know, they own an orphanage.

You know, I think they also. That's what's what? Keep doing shit like that. That's actually helping people. At night, you just dress a bit of suit. You know, people, bro, what the fuck is wrong with you? The Wayne Foundation is storied for all of their great work. Speaking of super rich ass out of touch assholes,

did you watch the Stephen Colbert clip I sent earlier? Yes. I did watch that, yeah. What did you think of that? I did not. So when I saw it the first time, because I'd already seen that clip, I thought he was trying to make a joke where he was like self,

I don't know. To deprecate. I don't think so. It didn't really come off like that. He just seems, I don't think Stephen Colbert's funny. I would agree with that. I used to love the Colbert Report. I thought he was very funny on that.

It was like the perfect time for somebody like that to come, be like the foil to Bill O'Reilly. Because if you ever watch Bill O'Reilly on Fox News, that guy was, he was electric. He was electric, but he was a character. And so Stephen Colbert did a great job kind of satirizing that. But then, I don't know, recently I feel like a lot of people kind of went through this, especially in the last two years. you just kind of like slowly lose your mind and I feel like he spent more time online

than he needs to be and I didn't even think the Tesla part of what he said was the worst part of what he said when he said a clean conscience is worth a buck or two I was like well $2 a gallon in gas to a normal American is a lot of fucking money I'll yeah it is like some people forget that not everybody has as much money

as they do when they're on television it's weird and yeah clean conscience worth a buck or two, but something tells me he wasn't saying, he wouldn't say that if, uh, there was somebody else that was president, you know? But you left it out, you left that out context of the rest of the joke. The context was, I'll pay whatever because I drive a Tesla. It was, I didn't take it as like he was holier than thou. I didn't, I didn't take it like that. No, I don't think holy than now, but you're right. He's saying like, I'll, I don't mind. I drive a Tesla so I don't really

pay that. I don't pay much of gas. I think that joke really doesn't lay. And he was saying, I don't, I don't pay much in gas because my car is a lecker, essentially. That was the joke. That was the joke. But those are the types of jokes that get Trump elected. That was like the number one trend on Twitter last night. All right. So, so Billy, when, when Billy says, like, this is what gets Trump elect, that's like my, it's the easiest thing to say, but I don't think it's true at all.

Like, nobody voted for Donald Trump because Stephen Colbert is a lib on the new. you know I'm going to be honest never mind okay that was honest that was another skip clip yeah clip that and just loop it and just have that as a fucking post

I'm gonna be honest never mind Billy thought about being honest for a second and he was like nope not worth it I'm gonna go back to lying and then never mind was so close to the end of the word honest like it was like a predetermined never mind yep uh all right the big question guys is

what kind of soup should I get for lunch. Always, always New England Clam Chowder, bro. Best soup there is. No, it's too cold and dreary for a chowder. What are you talking about? New England Clam Chowder? It's too cold and dreary for New England Clam Chowder?

For a hot soup, Maddawd? You need a broth. Wait, do you know what New England Clam Chowder? It's like creamy. I don't think it do. I do. I'm just saying, it's made for cold weather. You bundle up with your babe on a couch.

It's from New England. You watch a rom-com. New England. dreary days you're supposed to just pound choward it's dreary i like personally a broth i'm having chicken noodle soup right after this can't go to the beach today too sunny bro chicken little soup like a little soup is the default soup that shit is actually not that good it's just like agreed when you was when you was sick as a kid that's just for whatever rid was passed down this shit ass bro go get other soups like lobster biske like that's a

Yeah. Also, though, I'm going to be real. I'm just not a clam chowder fan. I don't like clams. So that's also part of this. Guess what? You just talked me into ordering clam chowder. It's too rainy and dreary for clam chowder. That's exactly.

The thought process. Clam chowder also feels like a summer soup. I feel like that's a summer soup. So you vindic- That's why people voted for Trump. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

Lives like me. I'm doing it just to trigger bad dogs. Exactly. God damn it. I don't think that's true. You just did it. We need to start keeping a running tally of things that Aryan thinks are ass. Chicken noodle soup.

On today's show, chicken noodle soup and Batman. It's going to end up looking like Tyler O'Day's list. Did you ever see that? Odayne's. No, no, no. He kept a list of things that he just hated. Oh, yeah. Chipotle was on the top of that list.

They share similarities, yeah. Things that you think are the wote. Yeah. What's your, we need to do another one of those soon. What's your woe of the week? wo to the week probably colbert i'm i'm i've got him on the brain i'm trying to think if anything else was so why don't we make a new list of segments woe to the week corrections war of the week billy's corrections sales teamings what what arian

ass thinks his ass arian's aryan's ass arian's ass i like arian's ass Thanks, man I love it. Arias is my favorite. That would be a fun segment. Yep. All right.

The ass with Arias. That's good. All right. Well, we will see you guys on Monday. Tuesday. I'll see you guys on Monday. They'll hear us on Tuesday. And so we'll have a great week.

I'm actually stroking the weights What the fuck was that? Billy's petting the weight The weight is this make you uncomfortable I just did it was so sensual I didn't know what the reason Was the essential touch

Aaron I also I want to talk to you next week Because it's NFL free agency starts I think like Monday Slash Wednesday The tampering starts on Monday But I'm interested to talk to you About a little bit about like

When you were a free agent And what that process was like When you were you were trying to figure out If you wanted to go to Miami or not all that shit what behind the scene stuff is that we don't maybe hear about as much I will do my best to

make it a fun talk all right so we'll see we'll see the rest of you guys on Tuesday next week love you guys love you guys