Massenomics Podcast - Ep.33: The Partycast Part 2

Episode Date: November 21, 2016

This week's episode is part two of the great Massenomics Partycast.  We were celebrating the one year anniversary of Massenomics Gym by binge drinking and over eating.  While we were at it we decided to throw in a podcast with over 25 guest appearances!  There are too many icons in the strength industry to even name drop on this one.  You are just going to have to watch (or listen) to hear them all for yourselves.  There was a lot of beer consumed, so anything goes in this epic collaboration.  Part two was getting pretty late in the night, so nothing was off limits... Check out the audio version below... Don't forget to LIKE and SHARE this episode on Facebook... Make sure you LIKE the Massenomics Facebook page... If you don't already have a closet full of Massenomics gear, go to the MASSENOMICS STORE and load up on swag... Also, please CLICK THIS LINK TO GIVE US A 5 STAR RATING ON ITUNES... Click this text to follow Massenomics on Instagram... Vote Massenomics for President in 2016... Have your barber shave our logo into the side of your head.. Maybe get a Massenomics tattoo while you're at it.    Or you could sign up for our email newsletter at the bottom of this page. Stay Strong, M

Welcome to Massanomics, the world's strongest podcast. Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter at Massanomics. Make sure you go visit massanomics.com. There you'll find the rest of our powerful content. While you're there, check out our store and buy yourself some of that sweet Massanomics gear. All right. So we got... powerful content. While you're there, check out our store and buy yourself some of that sweet, massive gear. Alright. So we got Brian, say what's up. What's up. Kevin.

Hello. Chris. Dildo. And Patrick. Alright guys. Are there restrictions for what we can and can't say? No, you're free to go. The main rule is just talk into the microphone so everyone can hear say. No, you're free to go. The main rule is just talk into the microphone so everyone can hear you. Patrick, you made the long ride down from Fargo.

How's it feel to be here right now? It feels amazing. Probably the first podcast you've been on this week, right? This week, yeah, but I've been on hundreds. Maybe thousands. So guys, how do you feel about the world of huge track anyway how do you guys feel about the world of vr right now vr pat have you got to try vr yet i have not well no no that's not true i i did like the the beta version of um the oculus rift did you you did i yeah i played

like this space game that's the movie right oculus rift no no no it's like a scary movie where you put the goggles on and then the ghosts come through no no it's like a scary movie where you put the goggles on and then the ghosts come through no no it's not yeah no you got you know what i'm oh yeah no kev's right you're right you're on pat pat why don't you just like walk away for a little while no i was kidding i feel like i'm being ganged up on right now so pat have you got tried the playstation vr i have not got to try you know you know chris has that thing in our basement right now. Have you tried the PlayStation 1? I can't wait to try it later. Have I tried what? The PlayStation 1.

PlayStation 1? The gray one. Oh, like the original? Yeah. Where you had the third person do Grand Theft Auto? Yeah. I feel like we should talk about that for a few hours. We have to lead into the VR.

Yeah. So, okay, okay, okay. Can I talk about my VR experience a little bit? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Indulge me. So, okay, okay, okay. No, but can I talk about my VR experience? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Indulge me. Okay, okay. So I was at my friend

Deshawn's house. He's from India. Do you say Sean or Deshawn? Ishawn. Ishawn. Ishawn. Yeah, Ishawn. It's the Indian version

of Deshawn. Very cool. Oh, okay. And yeah, but we call him Ish. Anyway. Ish on the suede? Yeah. Yeah suede yeah is he from West Coast Customs no yeah he used to be my ride is that the same guy he was the guy he put the TV's did the wheels

either the TVs in the headsets no no it's did the upholstery yeah yeah all right you guys gonna let me throw this VR okay so I'm in the so... Back to Ish. Back to Ish. Okay, back to Ish. Okay, so I'm in the Sean's bedroom, and he's like, you gotta try this. Put on the fucking goggles. So I slap him on. We're there. And it was a space game. I can't remember the name of it.

But, like, I was blown away by... Was it Stormtroopers? I don't think so. E-Valkyrie? I don't think so. But the one thing that was pulling away by me. Galactica. I pulled the throttle.

I was in a spaceship, and you're looking around, and I pulled the throttle, and I looked down at my hand, and it's like I'm wearing a glove. And it felt like your hand. It felt like I was in space. Yeah. This is awesome. Not a very cool story, but. No, no, it's. Chris, what's the roller coaster shooting when you got until dawn rush of blood yeah no when you see your hands

controlling that gun it's insane it feels real it feels real and and you go there's it's so it's like you're on a roller coaster and you're shooting stuff okay and so most of it you're just kind of flat and it'll turn it'll turn and then stuff jumps out, whatever. But then there's times where you'll go up the roller coaster, and then you'll go down, and then there's a dip. Just the sheer motion. And your stomach feels the same exact sensation. And watching Chris do this, he was like a giddy schoolgirl.

Okay, okay. I think the serious thing we need to talk about is it's already that amazing. Right away. Why do people need to even have a real life once this gets really good? Exactly. I'm plugging into the Matrix, baby. Peace out.

It's just like my parents are yelling at me from upstairs. Fuck you. How long? Headset on. I'm in space. Pat, you're a Broncos fan. Big long? Headset on. Pat? I'm in space. Pat, you're a Broncos fan. Big Broncos fan, yeah. How long until it's just like you can buy your VR

seat at the 50-yard line and just freaking watch the Broncos game? Forget about that. How long until I can play for the Broncos? How long until you can be 2005 Jay Cutler?cos. Exactly. How long until he can be what, 2005 Jay Cutler? Yeah. Do you think it comes

with concussions though? God, I can only hope. Will Smith, that movie sucked. Only if you want to experience the concussions. Chris, would you say 2008 Christian Ponder

would be among your favorite? Oh no, we're talking about 2010 here, right? Yeah, that would be my first choice. 2010, 2000. Only if the experience comes with his wife. That would be definitely a horror game though.

Oh yeah. The most terrifying thing you've ever experienced. The 2008 campaign with Brett Favre is just a pure fantasy game. 2009. Just amazing in every way. It's just pure joy. And then at the very end, it's just one moment of utter...

Like when you get done, you send big pics and stuff. Yeah. And then you just, like, yeah, this is my life. It's a little bit of happiness. And then just mostly just despair. So, guys, we have some sports aficionados here, probably more so than the regular podcast. How do you guys feel about the Warriors right now?

LeBron sucks. Of the Golden State Warriors? LeBron sucks? You can't say that. You want me to go on a rant right now? Of course, Pat is wearing a Cavs hat right now. LeBron is like

the best thing that's happened to our generation. Pat, did you see LeBron? Would you say he's like the Michael Jackson of NBA? I would say, like, compare him to one pop sensation. I would say he's the young part. The Ariana Grande of the NBA. The Ariana Grande of the Cleveland Cavaliers. He's the Jaquan of the NBA.

Making bangers all day. Okay, okay. Did you see him at the World Series, Pat? I did. LeBron on Game 7? Poser. I wanted to come. Chugging his beer?

Poser. So that brings up another point is we do have a real baseball freak in the house. Chris. I did it by yourself. But Chris, how do you feel about Game 7? He has a baseball hat on wah. But Chris, how did you feel about game seven of the World Series? It was a very fun game to watch. Like, honestly, watching it, I was like, if baseball was like this all the time, baseball would be amazing.

Yeah, 95% of the time. I think we're nowhere near that. But, like, Chris, how often in a game do you see guys stealing for second getting tagged out like guys like running home on a sacrifice fly and making like all this crazy stuff like that doesn't usually happen that's pretty standard baseball it's actually i think it's a lot of time game though right it's it's it's not so much the the actual play it's it's the kind of the gravity of the situation. It probably happens. Nobody's watching, though. It happens all the time, but the stakes are not that high.

Okay, did you guys see the tweet that went out that was like, it said something about Cubs and Indians, 2016 World Series. X-Ratings and the World Ends. Yeah, yeah. Okay, but what the guy did, he got like 150,000 retweets. But what the guy did is he made every single scenario in 2014 that could happen. And then someone found it? And then he deleted.

He deleted all the other ones. So he's a little bitch. There's even those pictures going around of like a guy in his yearbook from like 1990s saying like, 2016 World Series Cubs, you hit it here first. Like, maybe it's true, but that would literally be the easiest thing to Photoshop in the world. Like, it really wouldn't take them. I mean, I bet I could train every one of you fools to do it in less than 10 minutes. Are you that good?

That good, baby. There's a lot of money to be made, though. 150,000 retweets. How many followers do you think you got? Do you know what the breakdown is, Pat, on retweets to cash? Retweets to cash. Okay. I do.

One time, Rob Delaney retweeted me. Who did? Rob Delaney. He's a famous comedian. Were you talking about, like, the Outsiders or something? No, what happened was he sent, like, some. No, he's thinking Rob Lowe. Rob Delaney, not Rob Lowe.

Not Rob Lowe. He's a comedian. Not even the same. What about the Outsiders, though? That's good. He sent out some abstract tweet about vaping, and all I said was, I tweeted back at him, I said, what is vaping?

And he retweeted me. And then I got retweeted like 150 times, and then I made $1.50. Really? No, I didn't. And you've been on America's Most Wanted list since then? Carson Daly called me the next day. He's like, can I interview

you? He's like, I have a show called TRL that doesn't exist anymore. We got you and then we got Psy with Gangnam Style. We need both of you on the show tomorrow. Have any of you guys been retweeted by anyone famous before? Actually, funny story, Rob Delaney has favorited some of my tweets towards him, but I've never been retweeted by anybody famous.

I have been retweeted by Flying Ryan D. I've retweeted Kevin's tweets. Yes, that counts, right? Right? I think so. Okay. So I think I've been retweeted by's tweets. Yes, that counts, right? Right? I think so. Okay. So I think I'm retweeted by Zane Riggins before. Does that count?

No, that's a negative. That's about the B list. Oh, the B list? Are you sure it's not like the F list? Maybe even D. The Z list? Yeah. It's down there for sure.

Bottom of the barrel, without a doubt. But anyway, back to the World Series. Did you guys want the Cubs to win? Yeah, just all the shit can be done. I was really hoping the Twins would win this year. Well, they weren't in the game. After I realized the Twins were out of it in September, then I decided that they were out of it.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, so, you know, honestly, this was one of those games where I really didn't care. If the Cubs could win to end the curse, that's cool with me. But it didn't really matter to me. Okay. Pat, you're a Cleveland fan, though, so maybe you wanted to see. No, he's a LeBron fan. I'm very upset with their logo.

Yeah. I don't want to get too into it. Are you serious? Are you joking around? Upset with their logo? In what way? Just how funny it is. It's too funny for you. I feel like, yeah, it's really funny. The caricatures.

Pat just hates humor in general. I don't like it. Also, the Washington Redskins logo is too funny for me, too. I don't like it. People make a joke about anything. Like, where does it end? We have to draw the line somewhere, right? The Redskins can't do it.

Humor and sports do not mix. It's a serious business. This is a business. It ain't a game, okay? Yeah. Rule number one. Baseball business. Not baseball game, guys.

It's called Moneyball for a reason. Get used to it. Okay. So now that we've, you guys talked enough about sports? Are you guys sick of superhero movies? I'm kind of getting there. TV shows as well. Superhero TV.

I don't even watch those. I feel like they're just going to be like... I know Kevin has something to say about it because he watches all of them. Chris, what do you have to say about Gotham, Chris? Except for that one. It's okay. It's okay. Is it better or worse than the George Clooney Batman movies?

Well, I mean, those movies are pretty impeccable, so, I mean, it's pretty hard to... They have nipples on the Batsuits. So, you know they're that guy. Anatomically correct, baby. Okay. The close-ups to their crotches. Since the superhero thing's been played out, how do you guys feel about Westworld?

Let's talk about it. Do you want me to, like, go on a tangent right now? It's the best shit in the world. It's so good. I've already had, like, three different theories be debunked. Brian, have you all the way caught up, Brian? Yeah, I'm all the way caught up. Pat, are you all the way caught up? I'm all the way caught up. The only. I've already had like three different theories be debunked. Brian, have you hair yellow and cut up, Brian? Yeah, I'm all the way cut up. Pat, are you all the way cut up?

I'm all the way cut up. The only thing, I'm wondering like now. Hold on, wait. I walked around. Put a quick pause on this. I haven't seen any of them. Westworld, you know,

Star Wars Smith. No spoilers. No, Pat told me about the show before I knew about it and he told me that Ray Shremard was in it and then I found out that they weren't in it.

No, no, no. I gotta tell the story about it. That was the... Okay, okay and then I found out that they weren't in it. No, no, no. I got to tell the story about it. Okay, okay. And then I found out they weren't in it, and I got really mad. I saw the first episode of the show, and so I was really, really excited, so I texted Ryan the next day,

and I was like, hey, you need to watch this show. So I described the show to him, and he was like, okay, do you mean the Will Smith movie? He goes, it's like the Wild West. I'm like, the Wild Wild West with Will Smith? Yeah. Assless Loveless? Our less loveless.

Assless Loveless. Assless? Yeah, because he's got no legs. You are correct. How do I know you guys aren't hosts, though? What? How do we know you're not a host? How do you know we guys aren't hosts, though? What? How do we know you're not a host? How do you know we're all not hosts?

How do you know a host isn't running this podcast? Well, Pat, would it change anything if you knew that I was a robot? I would put you into sleep mode and do things to you then. Well, Pat, too bad he has a log that tracks all sexual activities, so you've been caught, man. That's cool. I want to watch that shit. Red-handed. Okay, so now that that's covered, we recently got to see some live concerts, and at the top of the list, I would say without a doubt, is Ray Stremmer.

Really good. And I can't recommend highly enough for anyone to see Ray Stremmer. Pat, what do you have to say about Ray Stremmer live in concert? Wait, wait, wait. When did you see him? It was at Zombie Pop Crawl, Minneapolis. What I have to say is it was above and beyond my

expectations. Slim Jimmy, Sway Lee, did they have to bring the party? They brought the fucking party. What happened was like i've never been to a concert where people throw their phones at the performers that was the insane thing people would give their people in the front row would give their phones to the race remember not even people in the front row people seven rows back would throw them up there what would he do with them he would take he would take a bunch of dick And then he would ask the crowd, he's like, whose phone is this?

And it's a trust system. People were pretty nice. And then he would toss the phone back. Pat, how many new iPhone 7s did you get that night? Let's just say a new order of seven iPhone 7s. Patrick's retired early. Three are still on eBay right now waiting to be purchased. Their concert is insane.

It's a party. Probably the craziest part, though, is after you get done at Ray Stremmer, we got to hit up Ja Rule. So jealous. And a 40-year-old Ja Rule. Pat, you went to it, didn't you? I did. He's ripped.

Absolutely ripped. 40-year-old Ja Rule takes his shirt off, two songs in. The guy's jacked out of his mind. I don't know what P90X CrossFit stuff he's on. Do you think he comes to Mastodonics Gym? Yeah. What a beautiful human being. If we could get a billboard of Ja Rule for Mastodonics, it would be crazy because he is ripped.

And then once you start going off with – what's his one with J-Lo? I'm real. Is that the one? With Ja Rule. Ja Rule, yeah. Yeah. Like, he starts getting to that, and the crowd takes over. Did you guys see that moment where he just, like,

dropped the mic and walked away because the crowd was singing it louder than he could do it? I swam my way to, like, the front. Like, I was up there. So we're on the balcony, like, watching this, and I look in the front row and i see ryan with his hands above his head i had to put my hands up i tried to get to ryan and these girls like linked arms so you're not getting past us and she's like do you want to

get hit in the face so then i had to go back up and. Please do it. And I was like, how do you know what I like? So how disappointing was Smash Mouth? So this little thing called, this little ditty called Smash Mouth. Maybe you've heard of them? They were big in like 1996. Pat, you didn't make it to Smash Mouth, did you? I wanted to see Black Beetle. Did you see the end or not? You didn't?

I was never there, no. You made the right move and watched basically Ray Stremmer and didn't waste your time. Because at this point in Smash Mouth's career, they've decided to turn it into a jam-bam. And I think they do it because Steve Harwell, the lead singer, just can't stand up for that long. He has to sit down and just take a breather.

Because they turned Walking on the Sun into like a six-minute song, and then they turned All-Star into like an eight-minute song. The most insane thing goes, you know they're going to end with All-Star because what other song could Smash Mouth end with? And the song starts with him not even singing. He just lets the crowd take somebody, and then the crowd starts with him not even singing. He just lets the crowd take... Somebody. And then it just... The crowd starts singing and the crowd sang the entire first verse.

After that, the chorus comes on. He kind of chips in. Second verse, he sings it. Second verse is done. He sits and just stares at the ground. Stares at the ground for the entire second verse. Maybe he was just getting in the zone to put his tongue out. You know, it looked like a really deep depression. I Maybe he was just getting in the zone to put his tongue out. You know, it looked like a really deep depression

actually. I think he was just, I think he was thinking, should I keep, should we keep doing this? Should we keep doing Smash Mouth? Like, I think he was questioning his life choices. Yeah, like right then and there, he's like, why are we doing this? He was like, I envisioned

a different life. I had an epiphany. It's too late for that. It's crippling social anxiety, though. I think we can... It's a good segue. Pat, go. All right, Pat, everyone knows you have a lot of good stories. Just give us your, like...

Just give us one. You guys got to give me that. Your tamest story that you can for a broad audience. Your tamest, not-tamed story. Like, anywhere from, like, CG-13 to story anywhere from like try to find one that involves maybe involves Lars Lars ok no I got a good one

this is going to go back to the high school days high school so are you under 18 yeah I know we were about 15 at this time 15 and Lars worked with my sister my. And Lars worked with my sister, my older sister. Oh, yeah. He worked with my sister at Bill's Super Value.

It's a grocery store that was in town. And he had said a comment. Me and my friend Andy, we were talking. He said a comment about my sister. And he said, my sister worked in the produce department. And he said, I would love to bend your sister over the produce cart. And then it gets better. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So one day, one day Lars gives us a ride to our, to my house and he was doing something outside. So me and Andy go inside and I don't know why my sister was like sitting on the couch.

She's a senior in high school. Yeah. She was still in high school. And, and I don't know why. My sister was sitting on the couch. She's a senior in high school. Yeah, she was still in high school. And I'm like, hey, Lars said he wants to bend you over the produce cone. And my sister's like, what the fuck? She's kind of throwing off a little bit. And Lars walks in. How old is your sister? At that time?

18. Yeah, senior Senior high school. Yep. So Lars walks in a little bit behind us, and he can tell, like, something's wrong. Like, something's off, and we're laughing. Something's amiss. Yeah. Something's gone awry.

And he turns to him, and he's like, he told his sister about what he said about the pro discard. And Lars, I thought he would, like, take it kind kind of humorously but he got just completely white in the face doesn't say a word and then what did he do this turns around takes off running he goes out he goes out the front door me and andy chase after him we get out in the driveway it was like kind of fall time so the corn was probably about cornfield across the house he is hopping over rows of corn just running through a cornfield like something like but he drove there right no no yeah he did why didn't he just get in his car and drive away he broke down he was going off the grid we had we got in his car because his keys were in there we picked

him up two miles down the road at megan forney's house he comes out of another cornfield and he hated us he did not talk to us we dropped off at home he didn't talk to us for two months wow well that's a good high school story. That's a very touching story. He took it very hard. That should be a movie. Sort of like a Stand By Me kind of film. Yeah, like Coming of Age. Like an Outsiders kind of thing with Rob Lowe.

No, Rob Delaney. Rob Delaney. Rob Lowe. Oh, that's the better Rob. Any stories with Bernie Curtin? Wait, any stories with Bernie Burton wait any stories with Ryan what about with Ryan

can I tell stories about when Ryan hated my guts yes okay back story me and Pat used to be mortal enemies back in the day boy meets girl mortal enemies to best friend story. This is about to unravel really deep.

Do you remember the TV in my front yard cover? Are we going to hit Joe Rogan levels and go two hours deep here? This is like opening up more good stories. We either got to wind down in four minutes or wind down now. You guys make the call.

Let's just have Ryan sing us out. Let's just end with a story. Can I tell Ryan's story? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's end with a story, then we'll... Okay, okay. Well, first night me and Ryan really interacted when it got bad was Bernie's Halo Party.

That's how I thought about it. Halo Party, long ago. To put it in, I'm going to try to describe, Bernie lived in an underground house. A house in the ground. His roof was a lawn of grass. It looked like the Shire. You could mow it with a lawnmower. A hobbit house.

Yeah, it is. Yes, yes. And I remember, I don't know what happened. We were cooking burgers or something. And I threw a meat patty at me or something. I threw a meat patty at Ryan. He said, I just bought this shirt. Yeah. Just stained the crap out of it. And he looked at me with blood in his eyes.

And then probably about 15 minutes after that, you just walked up to me with a BB gun in your hand. You looked at me. You pressed it into my stomach and then just pulled the trigger I don't remember that you know did you go ratata I was like now we're even like that really hurt is it is it cut off no no no we're good we're good uh what about this what about the story with uh the tv bernie's oh yeah at his house so it stems off that's what i was getting to one night i'm at home i'm watching spider-man one i was really like toby mcguire great movie i was very attracted to that scene where they do the kiss. He's upside down. I mean, who wasn't?

It's hot. Oh, her nips. You can see her tits. Goddamn. Oh, it's fucking beautiful. I'm watching that show. And my parents come home and they're like, Patrick, you got some fucking explaining to do.

And I'm like, I have no idea what they're talking about. They just interrupted Spider-Man. Oh, there's a lot. the Spider-Man's on TV. I go outside, it's pouring rain. And Larry, my stepdad, his like 1974 antique TV is sitting at the end of the driveway just covered in shit. Literally just like pounds of shit. Bernie's dad went for a drop bar. You could say a bucket load a a buttload of shit this is larry looks at me and he says you're gonna carry that in now and it's slippery it's

slick it's full of shit and it's raining out horribly it's kind of like the scene on shawshank redemption when he escapes the jail it's it's fucked up because I just came from watching the rain scene where Mary Jane and Spider-Man are making out this isn't anything like in the movies and then I'm on the rain picking up a fucking, it weighed like 75

pounds, this TV probably solid oak there's shit spilling into me there's shit like, I bring it in I I set it down, and Larry's like, I'm just going to throw that away anyway. Have you learned your lesson? I didn't learn a goddamn thing. I don't know what there was to learn from that.

Hey, but man, you're only 10 years later and you're still talking about it. Yeah, that's true. Were your tits showing by the end of it? What was I saying? Were your tits showing by the end of it? Oh, yeah. It brought a lot of memories back larry actually became spider-man okay okay so real quick to hold it down from the to wind this up pat what's your favorite masonomics memory favorite masonomics memory um i'm gonna say i saw a video of Tyler, that strapping fella, picking up a giant fucking ball of whatever.

I don't know what it is. Ball shit? A ball of jello. No, it was jello. A ball made of jello. No, it was like a granite ball. Yeah, a stone probably. Maybe it's an atlas stone.

And I was like, I don't know. I watch all the Instagrams. I watch all of them. And I was like, it's a stone problem. Maybe it's an Atlas stone. And I was like, I don't know. I watch all the Instagrams. I watch all of them. And I was like, that's a bad motherfucker. Heaviest thing I lift is my paycheck. Yeah, yeah. That fat, fat paycheck. Okay.

Chris. I'm broke. Favorite Masonomics memory? It was of the same day, of the same man, but he was doing the overhead press. Oh, yeah, yeah yeah yeah it was it was it was um Tyler and someone else it was that Dylan okay so there was those two going back and forth the only two left on the overhead press ladder overhead press it was first second event anyway but it was a lot of weight yeah

and he's struggling and he finally gets it. And then he screams as he drops it. Yeah, and it was. And then I involuntarily just start screaming too. It just felt so savage. Oh, yeah, it was awesome. Yep, yep. Okay, that's a good one. Brian, favorite Mastanomics memory?

See, I feel bad about this one because I don't have that many because all the times you guys have done these fun events, I've had to work. So I haven't got to go to one. So this is taking the cake right now. I think this is doing it for me. Okay, okay. That works. Kevin, favorite massonomics memory?

Yeah. Well, I've been there for about a month. My favorite one is all of the poses that Shane does. I'm a big fan of the big Shane poses. Hey, when you've got a guy that's that good at posing. I actually changed my workout routine to just flexing. I've heard that works better than actually lifting weights. You're in good hands.

If you flex all day long, your muscles are bound to get bigger. It's the mind-muscle connection, baby. That's what they call it. Okay. I call it gains. And Ryan, favorite Mathsonomics memory? I would say this is probably right up there. This is a great

event. A great... We're all together talking shop. Kind of about... We're going to get done with this. Go listen to some Arvichis. We've already listened to Sugar We're Going Down Swing

and My Follow-Up Boy on the playlist. A good DJ always plays that song. There's a Bacardi party and a live DJ. What more can you want in life, right? Maybe some panic at the disco? I don't know. Alright, well guys,

this has been another very exciting episode of the Mastodonomics Podcast. I'm Tyler... I mean, I'm not Tylerler who are you i'm not tyler stone i'm looking at tyler stone but my name is tommy you can find me here we'll give everyone the rundown um you can find me on instagram at tomahawk underscore deep patrick how can people find you If that's allowed If that's allowed

Alright I have a Twitter It's at Patrick Karski Also Brazzers Same as you And And Chris

Chris Where can we find you? Chris where can we find you? CU underscore Sandman. That's my Twitter and Snapchat. Okay. Oh, Snapchat. He's giving it up.

If you want to have some fun. You can find me on Instagram at flyingryan underscore D. That's F-L-Y-I-N-R-Y-A-N underscore D. Brian, where can we find you? Just Google Coach Spanton. I'm pretty sure that's the only thing I know about him. There you go. Kevin? Twitter and Instagram. Brian, where can we find you? Just Google Coach Spanton. I'm pretty sure that's the only thing I know about you. There you go. Kevin?

Twitter and Instagram. Kevin, do you want to share? No, Kevin does not want to share. All right. Well, that will do it from the one-year Mastinomics party. We will see you all again for this very, very special episode next year, next November, 2017. Later. Stay November, 2017. Later.

Stay lit, fam. And that is Tyler's. No, I'm not Tyler's daughter. All right, guys. We got really off topic on the last night. Can everybody hear me? We're here in the middle of a line change here at the Massanomics podcast. We've got a lot of people's wives and moms and parents here.

So let's sit tight just a second until everybody gets fired up. I may or may not cut this in post, depending on how lazy I am. Can I listen? I'm probably. I'm going to take a picture. I'll sit by Tyler. No, no, no. Just don't unplug this. Can we move this?

Is this in all the way? Yeah, is this working? If you can only hear one ear, you gotta kind of play with this in and out until you can get to... We have a very low budget. Everyone, can everyone else hear? Can you hear me? You're going to scoot closer. Push that in.

Can you hear me now? Testing. Can you hear me now? Testing. Everybody good to go? Mary, can you hear me? Just great to be out. Mary, there's a little knob up on the top.

This little thing here you can tighten to keep that in place. So, am I in a good spot right here, people? As long as you're willing to talk. I'm double timing it, people. All right, let's hear it. Talk into this. Right into it. Testing one, two.

Yeah, I can hear you a little bit. Testing one, two. Okay, let me tighten this. Oh, now I lost everything. In your ears? Yeah. God damn it. I'm probably going to have to cut some of this in post.

Yeah, it's your fault penis penis penis penis can you hear me now yep all right so we are here we are joined by let's go through names ready i am joe jamie and i am your host, Tyler. Next to me is... I'm Mary. And... I'm Megan, Tyler's wife. Mary is actually... Mrs. Masonomics. Mrs. Masonomics.

Mary is Tanner's wife. Quick question for Megan and Mary. What is it like being married to the strongest dudes in South Dakota for the last, what is it, four or five years? Between the two of you, you have basically been mating with the strongest men in the state for five years now. Tell us about how fantastic that is. Oh, boy. Remember, your brother is on a live circuit here. Oh, boy. Remember your brother is on a live circuit here.

Oh, boy. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. He's just so humble about it. I don't even remember that he's the strongest man. It actually was really funny. When we left the competition this year, when Tanner had a bit of a rough day there, When we left the competition this year, when Tanner had a bit of a rough day there, but on the way back, he said, you know, I was kind of getting to wonder whether or not I only really had a lot of fun here because I was winning or whether it was actually a lot of fun.

And he said, this time, he said, I didn't even place, but it was still a shitload of fun. So that's a win, right? At the State Fair, yes, we had all sorts of people there. We had lots of family, lots of Mastanomics people wearing their shirts, hats, everything. And I think that really added to it. People really enjoyed it. And do you guys feel like you have something to live up to?

Like maybe you guys should be stronger than you are now, or what's going on? Me? Yeah, I get shit together. What's going on, guys? Why aren't you the two strongest women in the state? They are. Because I'm married to the strongest man.

No, no, no. We are. We're the strongest women. Yeah, that is. They don't have the. Actually, Mary is Brent Let's just see. We are the strongest women. They just... Yeah, that is... They don't have the... Actually, Mary is Brentford's strongest woman. Yes. Ask Leah about my arm wrestling abilities.

That's right. That is true. From back a while ago, we did have Leah on who had her arm basically mangled trying to arm wrestle Mary. Not trying. We were arm wrestling. Please get it right. And it was not my fault. All the doctors said it was not my fault.

Allegedly. Allegedly, it was not my fault. But I, as far as living up to the strongest men in South Dakota I just think that our support at home and in the gym and otherwise helps them

do things I don't know I feed that man I feed him. Give a half a beef at home. I guarantee you guys make the food for them. Actually, Megan. I do his laundry. She washes my clothes.

I do cook all of the food. I'll give him the cooking. He cooks some killer almonds. I actually cook every piece of food that's ever cooked in our house. Well, yeah. But I also have never rinsed a dish not even once.

Oh, that's awful. I have never not heard about it afterwards either, though. Which has to count for something, right? Literally every time, like, you goddamn motherfucker! I fucking told you! Well, I want to ask Megan something.

So, Tyler has been on this amazing journey. And then this summer, now he is South Dakota's strongest man. So, that is, I know, well. No, here, deep down inside, I'm still stronger than him. I'm just going to let him keep the title for a little while. How do you deal with all the women that are trying to get at him? It's awful. Yeah, let's hear about that.

Baseball that. Yeah, he's. Believe it or not, we all have realized by now what happens when you do anything in the world of strength. You get into it thinking there's going to be like an army of chicks. And it actually is a bunch of dudes who are like, oh, that was awesome, man. And that's it. I think since my strongman adventure, I have had two Hutterites flag me down

out of nowhere and tell me about how that was pretty cool. They make pretty good pot pies. And that's it. And they wear tennis shoes with skirts. Their pants don't have back pockets. Why do the pants not have them? And the suspenders. It's not a relevant thing, but it should be noted.

We are, I do have to real quick, for the sake of our YouTube audience, I do have to, we're going to take a quick pause here so we can switch out a camera battery for the YouTube stream. And we will be right back in just a moment. So sit tight, and I will talk you back in. Bye. Battery's going to die in the cave. No back pockets is pretty good.

No back pockets. But that's not true. Is it true? It is true! Have you seen their payouts? They have no back pockets. Some of the finest uninterrupted... Do you like those ones? I'm gonna try. Have it. You gotta get through this one first.

Um, I will take that, going to get through this one first. I will take that, but let me finish this one first. Really weird directions. Jamie, this is going around the back. I hope you're going to be editing some of this. What parts? Are we recording? All right, we are back live here.

Batteries are all changed. People are doing things. I have a bone to pick with you guys. Oh, shit. Let's hear it, Jamie. Kenneth Bone. Kenneth Bone. Doctor, Kenneth Bone. I came here tonight because I was almost promised to win a Massanomics t-shirt.

And she only lives two blocks away. That's also why she came. That was half the reason. It's really accessible. It was. But I heard wearing a Massanomics t-shirt adds five pounds to your lift. So I was really hoping for that. But unfortunately, I didn't win one.

So now I guess. You get to buy one like the rest of our customers. But maybe you could have a family discount. But does that still add the five pounds? Actually, I think if you actually pay for the shirt, there's more gains. Maybe six pounds. Or 40? Oh, 40.

I could work 40. That might be too bold, but I think, truthfully, I don't know. Buying a shirt, I think, actually goes a lot further towards your gains than winning one. Sure, sure. Actually, I think the only people that have ever won Mastanomics shirts have won them in the last two hours here. True. Because Tanner never gives a damn. No.

Actually, here's the deal. The way it actually works for us is even we have to buy our shirts at full price. we have to buy our shirts at full price. Even much to my wife's chagrin, we buy our shirts at full price strictly so we don't fuck up the inventory. But everyone does, so that's kind of... Yeah, we just all do. Here's the deal, though.

He won't buy the same shirt as me because if we buy the same shirt, we can't wear it together. And I'm all about matching outfits. Do you girls make your husbands wear matching outfits to you no good i have something to talk about with the massonomics and outfits a lot of times tanner will try to leave the house wearing a massonomics shirt and a massonomics hat and not allowed to you're not having it no He can wear a shirt or a hat, but not both.

Sometimes Joe and I can wear the same size clothes, so we just share. That was a bit off topic. Sometimes I have the same issue with wheat growers related clothing. As Jack and Tanner call the old Wheaties. The thing is, you can't... Now, you don't want him to wear two specific Mastodonics items at the same time. No. But what about just in general

couples like you making your husband wear something that matches you? No. Do you guys ever wear couples themed outfits? Here's the deal, guys. I only want it once. I'd like to dress this. Let's hear it. This is Grandma Masonomics.

Grandma Masonomics here. If the husband and the wife are wearing matching clothes, that means the husband has been caught in something. It's perfect. Very, very perfect. Not sad. That is actually exactly what I believe because there's absolutely no way I could hand over

the amount of leverage that it would take for my wife to make me wear something that matches hers. That would be worse than being caught eating crackers in bed. She wants nothing more than for me and her to wear the same t-shirts or some cute themed

fucking outfit. I said once. Just one time. And then you make it about this whole thing and I just want it once. And I won't have it. I was in the...

Was it a family reunion? It doesn't matter. Just one time out in public. That's all I ask. I asked Joe one time to not wear gray on gray and that was the wrong fucking question to ask. That's called a grout fit. What's wrong with gray on gray?

Tanner rocks the grout fit at least two to three days a week. What is everyone's problem with black and khakis? No. I don't understand that. I'm more black and khakis. Tyler is very black and khakis. I don't understand that. I'm wearing black and khakis. Tyler is wearing black and khakis. Someone yelled at me for that.

Jamie's friend actually. I was wearing black pants and brown shoes. That was it. What the hell? Great pants. I took a girl home that night. It was my long time girlfriend, but I took a girl home that night it was my long time girlfriend but I took a girl home

what about gray pants and a gray a different color gray shirt no Tanner rocks that look what like sweatpants no no no no no, no, no.

You guys. No, gray khakis and a dark gray shirt. And I'm like, oh, darling, what a nice grout fit you have. I was on my way out to visit my new boss's cabin and told Joe, maybe you could just wear jeans and this gray shirt. So Joe put on gray shorts and a dark gray shirt, and I said, you can't wear that. He said, well, it's just gray. I said, that's exactly the point.

That is the only thing it is. Exactly. I kept going with my point on this whole gray thing, and what did he end up wearing? The gray shorts and the gray shirt. So it was a very good look. You do have the job. I still have the job. So,

And the boyfriend. And the fiance. So, you're on the video. You can't hide. You can't hide. Everybody sees you. And actually,

I would say that 175% of our audience is YouTube. So everyone already knows there's no way to hide. Denise, it's a smart friend. I don't know if I can get the microphone closer. Please get your face up there. Get your face up there. I'll run the levels.

So, TJ, how often does he poop his pants? Are we on poop here? Probably more than I know. So, was the story that he told earlier about pooping in his pants at the gym? That was the first time I've heard that. No shit? It was. Really?

So, are you guys going to have like a bone to pick later? You're going to be like, you son of a bitch. Now it's on the fucking internet. No, no. First time I heard it. And I got it on Snapchat. No shit. Like the actual incident?

Yes. That is fantastic. So do you, so he goes and exercises at 5 o'clock in the morning, which does that, is that a red flag for you? Are you like, eh, I feel like he's probably fucking crazy because he does fitness things at 5 o'clock in the morning. I knew he did that before I met him. But this morning, however, I was like, we have four kids at home. Why are you going to the gym at 7.30 in the morning? We have other things to do before the kids wake up.

Now, was his explanation, there's four kids in this house. I think you know why I'm going to the gym, right? Right. Right. I think that's usually all the reason I need. It's like, oh, I have children. I need to absolutely get the hell out of here. But I took all four, three girls to the mall today and gave them a break. So he could have

stayed home this morning. And instead he went to lift their weights. On a Saturday. Who's in those games? It's our snuggle time. But isn't it magnificent having boyfriends and husbands who are super muscular and look fantastic with their shirts off and such. I'm a little disappointed with the shirts off thing, though. Tanner never lifts anything or carries anything for me, so I get nothing out of this.

Yeah, I agree with Mary here. But don't we all look fantastic? No. The shoes. No. You do. I just want you to carry my groceries. And I want you to carry my furniture.

And my hammerslogging spools. I like it when Tanner gets invited over to family gatherings, and it's mainly in regards to, we've got a piano downstairs. Do you think you can get it up the stairs? Or this dresser needs to go. day after tanner and i got married my mom uh told us that she has a very big brunch planned it was right around 35 ton i believe that everyone had to be at and she said tanner and i have to be at this brunch and i was like that's early we cannot be there and she's like you have to be here everyone's going to be here

so we went and uh we walk in the door and then my mom says mom's going i don't think so okay we've got this piano that you guys have to get up the stairs right now. Because they're picking it up right now. And Tanner, very hungover, has to haul this piano with my brother and two cousins up the stairs. And I was at the top of the stairs watching to make sure. And Skye. Skye was also there. Skye.

He was clutch, too. Yes. When it comes down to hungover furniture movers. Hungover furniture movers. Quantity is quality. It was very bad. Also, I did hear, too, that for Tanner it's a pretty regular problem where any time he ends up at a family function,

like nothing heavy will get moved. What is happening? We have some bit of a lose out here. Some sort of Jerry Springer chair. Larry's doing something. Let's get back on track. Larry's got his shirt off. Probably.

What? And I'm missing this? Right? You're next, Megan. Let's hear the poop story, Mary. Did Tanner tell you his poop story? Probably. Let's double check poop story, Mary. Did Tanner tell you guys the poop story? Probably. Let's double check this here.

Go ahead. No, I have not heard that one. Well, this is a poop story of Tanner's, and it's not, I was not there, but I know about it. Tanner was driving to work, and he worked far away away so he had to leave early in the morning and he was driving and he was about a mile away from her house and realized he had to go to the bathroom right now. Right now. So he goes to this trucker gas station, goes over to the men's bathroom and the men's bathroom is closed so he

goes waits in line in front of the women's bathroom and the women's bathroom uh someone was in there and he waited and then they came out he goes in and is pooping his pants in the women's bathroom. His pants or the toilet? Well, I think just the toilet, but probably both. And then plugs the toilet completely and then leaves the women's bathroom. And there was a line of three ladies waiting to get into the women's bathroom that he had just plugged completely. He had just crushed. Tanner. Not the five-year-old. In his

defense, they probably would have plugged it anyway. They were about to plug that toilet. What were they doing that early anyway? It probably would have been with a tampon. Let's get back on track here for a moment.'ve asked i think everybody here tonight this question but tyler i believe i haven't asked you okay so you just bought this iphone fresh iphone you bought it yourself you're going to the bathroom you're going to the bathroom in this porta potty. But you have to like... The person before you destroyed it. Diarrhea.

Everything. And you drop your phone. What do you do? Do you grab it? Do you leave it? Go. It's my phone. It's your phone. You just bought it with your own money. And I dropped it into poop. Diarrhea. To be exact. I will grab it.

It's a porta potty. I will grab it i would i will it's a port-a-potty i will grab it 10 times out of 10 okay but listen you don't have water to wash your hands don't care only sanitizer don't care you're gonna walk around poopy finners all night fucking 900 phone i am cheaper than i am clean for sure so what do you do with your poopy hand? Deal with it. I'll get my phone, and then I will sort the rest out later for sure. Okay, second part to this. Okay. You drop it at home. Do you flush first and let the water and stuff go down?

No, you've got to get it out fast. You've got to get it out fast. Time is everything, right? What's going to happen to your hand? Here's the deal. I want to tell you guys a little story about what I do for a living. I am technically a heating and air conditioning professional, but sometimes people call us with regular problems because they just do business with us.

So literally yesterday, it's 2 o'clock in the afternoon. I'm kind of gearing down towards getting off work early. We get a call that says, oh, well, someone was showering and it wasn't draining and they tried flushing their toilet. It wasn't draining. So can you go check it out? So I go there and it is a sewage ejector pump

that is not working. This is a pump that sits in the bottom, sits in the bottom of three foot of human waste always forever and just pumps human waste out as it fills up that's what that pump's job is to sit in shit and that pump it's not a glamorous job its job is only only slightly less glamorous than mine and i fucking have to figure, oh, well, for sure it's this shit pump that's bad. And now I have to take it out and replace it. And now it's Friday afternoon.

And all I want to do kind of is tell these people, well, you know, I don't know. Fuck off. And I'll see you guys never it's certainly not your uh heater or air conditioner yeah so eat shit you got plenty of it in this tub i don't fucking care i'm leaving right i can't do that so it's nice guy and we we ordered the new the new thing but but i i'm handing there and i have if you can see on the video, giant fucking banana hands. And my boss sends me out with a new pump and size medium latex gloves.

Two size medium latex gloves. So I put one on. Now, just to clear up, two pair or two? Two gloves. One pair. So I put one on, and it immediately rips open. And I put the next one on and it immediately rips open. And I put the next one on and it rips open. So at that point, I only have like paper towels.

So is this your family's waste or something? No, this is a customer's waste. Somebody has to buy it. Just some regular old people. So I then have to, I pull this thing out and it is it's the size of i don't know like a bowling ball a big weird shape bowling ball and a half but it's covered in like just shit but like but like but like years of shit but like all the different kinds of flavors of shit so there's like old hard black poop also like like like, fresh, greasy poop on it as well. But the only thing I have to do is put tools on it and unscrew things from it.

And you can't do that without touching it. It really had more layers than it did. Oh, there was a half inch of shit just on it. And toilet paper, like it was fucked up. A condom. Really fucked up. Not condoms. I have lots of stories about condoms and sewer drains not a lot of tampons i don't but you don't need one in our our municipality so i get this i get this all opened up and then but there's no you can't

unscrew it so i'm just I don't have any deals. So I'm just like, have my hand in just a bunch of human shit. And I'm just, this hand, no gloves because they're fucking ruined. Eventually the job has to get done, right? So I just go through and I get it all taken apart, put the new thing on, put it all back together and wash the fuck out of my hands for about a half an hour and then i showered or do you shower at work or oh like like before i go home for the day no i i don't shower before i go home for the day okay i didn't know if you with things like that like literally i don't normally get into human waste type stuff. I normally get, like, kind of dirty.

Air conditioning. Yeah, I'll get dusty or gross. And the hoarders. Hoarders and stuff like that are bad. But actually, like, I wear, like, actually, like, slacks and, like, a button-up collared long-sleeve shirt all day. So, Tyler, let's hear about the women the stay-at-home moms that hit on you yes we know there's been some i'm all about love to hear about it i only have probably one story that's worth telling i feel the beat i think my

wife might know this story i don't remember but it's in a town in which both Tommy and Ryan DeFay are from. Millbank and TJ Johnson. Oh, really? Probably Millbank. I would guess Millbank. It was a long time ago. I'd say five, six years ago. You're good?

I'm good. Thank you. But we were doing a bunch of remodels. There was a bunch of renters. It was low-income housing, so a lot of people who are not paying for their houses. A lot of them have children, no fathers and such. So one of them, I was there, and I was up working in the bathroom on something or other. And the gal who was renting the place stands there and stands right in front of the door

and starts getting into some fairly suggestive conversation with me and i i immediately go well i think i gotta run and i was kind of trying to get out of it because truthfully she wasn't wasn't that attractive either i meant to say what i meant to say was my my wife was super attractive and I'm super faithful. But no, so she was definitely not on my to risk my marriage list for sure. Yeah. So anyway, she kind of is like quartering me in this bathroom. And it's just me in a bathroom. And she kept standing there walking closer and closer.

So finally I said well i gotta run and get a ladder off my truck here i'll be i'll be right back and i was just being nice i said was that an innuendo no and and i even said i even said you know it doesn't matter how tall i am i said i said sometimes you just no matter how tall you are you just need a few steps up you know and and so what she did was then step right in front of me as I said that, and she goes, she said, well, I don't think that's the case, and was, like, right up in my shit, and I went. With that accent.

Yeah, and I went really smoothly and went out the door and went next door and grabbed a guy that i was working with and i said i said travis um grab that ladder and i need you to come with me he was like well why and i said because i think this fat girl's trying to have sex with me and i need you to come over here and run interference and he goes what and he came there, and as soon as we walked upstairs, she was still standing in the bathroom door. And then as soon as she saw him, she looked me right in the eyes and gave me this look that went, you motherfucker.

Like, what the fuck did you just do? Like, I had just sold her out and brought back. She wasn't for the menage a trois. Apparently, all she wanted was this guy. She was more for the solo act. And even better, actually, after they got done, the state ended up paying to have

all these places remodeled because they were low-income housing. After she got done with us remodeling her entire place, she fell asleep with her stove and lit her entire fucking brand new remodeled her entire place, she fell asleep with her stove and lit her entire fucking brand new remodeled kitchen on fire. Oh, no.

And then got evicted from her house a couple weeks later, so I didn't have to deal with it. But it was about two weeks after that moment I had to deal with her staring at me every time I was working in another apartment in that complex, which is really weird. Megan, is that the first time you heard that story? Yes. Yes, it was. I've got a... I'm going to get an earful later. I've got a bit of a related story.

Go ahead and judge this. The summer after my freshman year of high school, I worked at the Ramada in Aberdeen here. And, uh, maintenance. So a call came in on the wire that there was a plug tub in one of the suites that had a tub. So being the rookie, you know, a plug tub is pretty easy.

So they sent me out to it, and here the tub was plugged with rose petals. Very sexy. And I saw you're fixing the plug and whatever, and she says, yeah, I live here in Aberdeen. It's just that I don't get to see my husband very often, and he came over on lunch break, and I had some rose petals, and we plugged the tub. And you can't ask them to leave the room while you're fixing the problem so you took off all your clothes right she carried on with the story and take in mind that I am 14 or 15 years old at the time. I don't know. About these rose petals. No, I knew about rose

petals. But I didn't... First time hearing about them, though. So anyway, I pulled them out of the drain like a real maintenance man. Fixed the problem. Like a fucking boss. But it was gross.

And that was it. Do you have any I'm going to be honest. I really thought she was like that she then got all handsy with you. She was laying on the bed telling me about these rose petals. What more do you want? Let me retell this story.

And then she wrestled him to the ground. Maybe 50. He took his pants off. Gross petals. Did we lose the camera, Tanner? I used the drain snake. How was that? Terrible story.

That was a terrible one. And then he used the drain snake. So cute. Oh, my mother. It was a government issue. Well, I want to thank everybody for listening. And thanks for bearing with us tonight.

Honestly, at this moment, I really don't know how any of this sound is going to turn out. We have a shit ton of music. We're in a big, huge echoey hall with, what would you guess, 50, 60,000 people? Right. 75 million people here partying. And I hope the audio turns out so you guys can hear it. And I hope the parts that I wasn't around weren't totally off the fucking rails. I'm sure they're off the rails, but those guys are a fucking fun bunch.

So thanks for listening. I intend on splitting this up into two episodes, so I hope you guys have enjoyed this over the last two weeks. And we'll catch up with you with the as usual later. So I am Tyler Stone. You can find me on Instagram at TylerFNStone. Go to Massanomics.com. You can find our store there.

Buy some cool shit. Scroll to the bottom of the page. You can sign up for the newsletter. Go to YouTube. Make sure you subscribe to our page. Make sure you like our Facebook page and follow at Massanomics on Instagram. Thanks for listening. Everybody sign out.

Say bye. All right. Thanks a lot, guys. And stay strong. You just heard the massonomics podcast with your ears. You're welcome. Check us out on Facebook. Find us on Instagram at massamics and make sure you visit

Masinamics.com and buy some of that sweet Masinamics gear from your friends at Masinamics studio, home of the world's strongest podcast, stay strong Thank you.