Matthew Cox | Inside True Crime Podcast - Christmas In Prison

Episode Date: December 25, 2023

Matt and Zack Talk About Christmas In Prison

There were three things that went on at Christmas in prison. First of all, we had a day where we'd all go down and get hot. I didn't think you were going to remember the hot. Hey, this is Matt Cox, and we are going to be talking about what it's like to do, not Christmas, because they don't have Christmas and Thanksgiving in prison. They have holiday meals, right? Are we doing just the meals or just being in prison during the holidays? Are we doing being in prison during?

Yeah, let's do that. Being in prison, being in prison, we're doing being in prison during the holidays. But still, like it's not, they're holidays. That's right. I forget. I forgot your little liberal. So, so anyway, so I felt like it was Christmas. You know, it was Christmas.

even though, you know, people would go around and they would say, well, they wouldn't say holidays. No, listen, inmates are by far not extremely liberal people. Okay. You're going to tell them to hit the like and comment. So if you like the video, do me a favor. Hit the subscribe button. Hit the like. Hit the like.

Hit the subscribe. Hit the bell so get notified a video just like this. Also, do me a favor. Leave me a comment in the comment session. I try and respond to all comments. And also, please consider joining my Patreon. So check out the video. The first time I did that, I was at Danny's, at Concrete.

I couldn't do it. Like, Danny was just like, he was like, say this, say that. He videoed me and just to put something up on my channel. And I could barely get it out because it sounds so corny. So overwhelming. It is. But now I realize like, you know, it is. I remember some guy left me a comment one time.

He said, yo, bro. He's like, I know you don't want to consider yourself like a YouTuber or, or, influencer or whatever he's like yeah but you are dude he's like so you need to just deal with it i was like well trend a little harsh no i was just thinking a little harsh bro like yeah deal with let me ease into this so go ahead so prison prison during the holidays yes so um the holidays i think we should do it in in order like you got thanksgiving all right and christmas you know, and New Year's because each one of those has a different

effect on... So it's Easter. Don't you get Easter? Isn't that like an Easter meal? Easter. It's not really a good meal. It's not like a serious meal. Well, see, Thanksgiving is on a Thursday, right? And it's a big meal. And the only reason I want to bring it up

is because of like the preparation beforehand. Like, if you're there and you're somebody that gets commissary, then usually five or six guys get the and go, listen, we're all going to go down there. Everyone's going to bring back their ham and turkey. You know what I'm saying?

They have a plan for a festivity, a meal back at the unit. Are you saying commissary? Right. No, like, if you're hanging around people who get commissary on Thanksgiving, right? If I get commissary, I'll tell you, look, we're going to make a meal. Right. I'm going to mix things up. You're going to go down to the child hall and get your turkey and your ham and bring

it back during Thanksgiving. and I'm going to make us something special for Thanksgiving dinner. Okay. Right. The point I'm making is we kind of, it's like, it's one of those times where if someone's going to cook,

they kind of get with their perspective in prison family. Like the people that I really mess with. You know what I'm saying? I hear what you're saying, but what I'm talking about is let's talk about the, I'm talking about the actual meal. Like you actually get a meal.

Yeah, you do get a meal. Like you're saying you bring your stuff back. That's after. I'm talking about before. beforehand. So for instance, right now, Thanksgiving. You actually get a, you don't get a Thanksgiving meal. Yeah, you do. I mean, on Thanksgiving. They don't call it a Thanksgiving meal. Okay. What do they call it? They call it a, it's a, it's a holiday meal. All of them are holiday. You never noticed that. They never say where it's, it's Christmas, it's, it's Christmas dinner or it's

things. The holiday meal is going to be, because they try not to kind of push that. Right. For some reason. Certain religion. right right so yeah you're right and so what like at the medium um which was basically just like because by the time i got locked up well and you got like we had the the what was it the national menu yes they changed where it used to be every prison kind of came up with their own menu right um and but eventually they said okay here's what we're going to do we're going to do a national menu so across the throughout the entire nation on tuesdays you get this on Wednesday on Thursday not

that they ever, ever followed that menu to the letter, but they kind of came semi-close. Right. So, so, but for the holiday meal for like Thanksgiving, you'd have a regular breakfast, which was usually trash, something like a continental breakfast. And then for lunchtime, around 12 or 1, that's when you would go and get the turkey. Right. They'd have like cranberries. Yes.

They'd have ham for some people. one place had actually turkey neck i remember but um they'd have the the stuffing i don't know what turkey neck is it's a turkey neck of the turkey actual neck of the turkey actual neck of the turkey jessup actually when i was at jesop they did yeah and people anyway i i wanted extra it was so good it's a lot of bones yeah but it was good but uh okay all right it looks like a slinky it's like this but um because it collapsed on itself so it's but um the it's cranberries stuffing mashed potatoes um you get ham and turkey um you get a sweet potato pie you kind of get like a full meal it's like a tray and something else but they give it to you at

lunchtime you get it about 12 or 11 or 12 o'clock was it it was at lunchtime yeah it was at lunch because then when you left they'd give you a bag for your dinner right you got a bag one Bag dinner, which was a couple of sandwiches. And that was really because normally when you're there, all food had to be eaten in the chow hall. On Thanksgiving, they'd look the other way and let you sneak some of the food back. Yeah, I'm sure that depends on the administration at the time.

Yeah, most, most, like I had never once seen them take food coming out Thanksgiving. Okay. So here's the thing that I noticed. was that, you know, when I got locked up, like the concept that they would give you a special meal for the holidays, didn't even occur to me. What? Never even occurred to me that that would, that the prison would go out of its way for the inmates

for a holiday meal. Because to me, you know, being on the outside, not knowing anybody who'd ever really been incarcerated, I thought that it was basically that everything would be kind of standardized and that there would be nothing special for any special days or any special meals. I thought it would all, you know, I'm thinking slop. Like you go through the line and slop, you know what is that? You know, just eat it. Like I really thought the, this is before you went? Of course, it's before I went.

Because once I went, you know, you immediately start, you know, you're in county jail. Well, you're in the marshal's holdover. And guys who have been to prison start telling you like, yeah, like, oh man. like you know like I was in for like Thanksgiving and I just before Thanksgiving and they had a Thanksgiving they had a meal but within a few days of me being there but it was like a county jail meal which is horrible you know which is it's like they give you like an X like two slices of like baloney and like you know a piece of toast and of extra compared to whatever you were going to get normally and that's it. And so guys were saying like, oh, man, when you get to prison, you're going to, you get this and you get this and you're like, what? Like, I'm shocked they gave us this. Right. They're like, nah, bro.

Like, they'll give you good food. Like, it's, it's, it's, you know, oh, you get a, you know, and they start telling you all the things you get, which, you know, we'll talk about the Christmas bag in a minute. But yeah, so I didn't think anything. So the first time I got to prison and really got like the Thanksgiving kind of, you know, holiday meal. Well, I was, and keep in mind, too, I got there before the national menu. They still had fountain soda and seven up. And like, it was amazing. Can we talk about that for just one second?

Yeah. Because I was thinking that when you were saying about your concept of it, because when, like, I got there in 2007, what year did you get there? I got there in 2007. All right. the noticeable decline in the food in 2007 when we got there when you got french fries on Wednesday they were hot do you remember that yes yes and the burger was good with lettuce and tomato with mayonnaise ketchup yeah i mean listen in the morning there was scrambled eggs yes there was there were like um you got like a uh you know like grits you got scrambled eggs you got

some kind of uh yeah i was going to say oatmeal some kind of uh danish some kind of like a danish type thing like you got you got stuff like it was like it was like wow yes and then the national menu came but there was a decline there had been there had been a decline for 10 years keep in mind ross um reese which is my my cousin which is really my brother-in-law's cousin but it's cousin it's your cousin and in prison he might you might you might You might have all grown up with together. Reese was, you know, when Reese got there, you were smoking cigarettes. Not that I smoked, but they smoked cigarettes.

They got, they had two huge bags, you know, for your Christmas bags, which we'll talk about. They had, they used to tell these guys, you had two lockers. Every inmate got two full-size lockers. Yes. You got Tupperware bowls. And they told them when they went to, went to the hospital. holiday meals, bring your Tupperware bowls. They would let you fill up two Tupperware bowls of food and bring it back.

Like, it was, he's like, he gained like 25 pounds within the first two or three months when he got to federal prison. Wow. Of course, he was on meth. But he was starting from zero. And he talked about how it had gone down and every year, down, down, down, down. So anyway, but yeah, back to the Thanksgiving meal. And you said it's progressively got that worse.

Yeah, the decline of it was unbelievable. So, like, our first Thanksgiving meal that I remember at Coleman was fantastic. That's what I'm saying. I mean, like, there was, I can't remember what was in the foil paper, but I think it was like beef. I'm like, oh, my God. They give you the cornish hens. Yes. You got a cornish hen.

You always got a cornish in, by the way. Cornish Hinn, Christmas? Was it Christmas or was it Thanksgiving? Are you sure? Yeah, Cornish Hinn was Christmas. Thanksgiving was sliced turkey. You know how many people will be angry at this conversation? I mean, I don't blame them, but it was, first of all, it was like my first Thanksgiving

millionaire, I couldn't believe it. But then I think my last Thanksgiving millionaire, I couldn't believe it because it was so bad. Right. I can't believe this. Should be a shame of yourself. It almost makes it not worth coming to prison. That's right. But it started off very, very good, but it is a large size.

It's a big meal regardless, even back at the end. And back then, I don't like, you couldn't eat it all. You couldn't eat it all. The day, did they give, I think they still had a dinner tray at night. I think they, with the national menu, came the bags. I think we ate Thanksgiving dinner. Yes, yes. And then you'd go back and nobody went, I remember nobody.

nobody went back for the other tray. Like, I went in there for dinner going, what the... There's no reason. No, there's no reason to go back. You're so full. You're sick. So they started with just the back.

Everybody's napping. Yeah. They got the idas. So you go, so, okay, so that's Thanksgiving. Right. Like, you have enough to bring back. You're enough to eat. You're good.

And that's what I was going to say. So it kind of like, and I was going to bring this point up, people create, like, when you're there, because you're around. people it's like family right so the people that you hang around with like at least every year that I've known somebody would say hey for Thanksgiving Matt I'm cooking up something you want to get in on it what do I need buy two soups and a turkey log you know what I'm saying and then they would take all the food to make like a gumbo or put something together and they

all sit and eat together and watch watch the football game right you know I'm saying you know it wasn't of course it wasn't like a woman with an apron oh at some points places it was but But, you know, serving everybody in their bowls, you know. Is he like this all the time, Winter? What? With the silly jokes and the, is it? I'm sorry. It's a bad thing.

Yeah. It really is. Like, he's a dad joke all the time. But I thought, I thought it was a beautiful thing. Right. The camaraderie. The camaraderie of it. Yeah.

It's embarrassing. No, this is different. People, what's what big dog? You had your chance to display all that. All right. So, yeah, so I get it. So, yeah, there's a. It was, I had moments then.

I thought it was nice. I'm like, oh, this is like my Coleman family. This is like my USP Beaumont family. Oh, my Jessup family. What about Christmas? Now, so Christmas came. There were three things that went on at Christmas. in prison.

First of all, we had a day where we'd all go down and get hot chocolate and cookies. Oh, I didn't think you were going to say that. I didn't think you were going to remember the hot chocolate and cookies. Yes. I didn't listen.

And that's before the Christmas meal. So like maybe Christmas Eve or the day before Christmas Eve, they would call everyone back to their unit and then we would all line up and we would all go one at a time in a long single file line to the child hall

and get a cup of hot chocolate. hot cocoa and a little bag of cookies. Yeah, two or three cookies, maybe, you know, but, but, but real cookies. At the beginning, at the beginning, it was a bag of sugar cookies. Oh, yeah. It was actual a bag. And then it went down to two or three cookies. Yeah, we got, we got two or three cookies.

Then it was actually some crumbs you'd have to sweep up off the floor. But they were, they were decent sized cookies. But here's what, what killed me is that guys that would bitch and moan, man, making us like, like, we was a bunch of little kids going to line up and go get you go get your hot chocolate go get your cookies oh oh yeah that man be embarrassed man that's just ridiculous i go you go you go on man you know i'm going cops shut up i'm behind you you go let's go i'm behind you're not going i'll take your ticket i'll go through twice oh yeah they did give you a ticket yeah and they were and they're like man was it coleman that used to give us tickets for lunch

no we used to scan our ID scan your ID yeah there was a place that used to give tickets out for yeah well we with the Christmas meals you always got a ticket oh guys would always. Oh, that's right. So you couldn't skip or do-wop. You know how many times I tried to like go by like I would get like colored paper and then you try and figure like I got three sheets of colored paper and I'm going to cut the cut the ticket out. And then you could go through like multiple times, right?

I thought that wasn't Coleman with the tickets? Yes, because we used to save the tickets because I remember in the desk drawer. But that wasn't like for every day. That was just holiday. I thought it wasn't for every day because people go, I don't have a lunch ticket. And I go like, look, I got a couple in here we could use. No, this was, this was scanned. What color is a ticket?

Okay. Trust me, you scanned it. Oh, yeah. Because if you scanned it twice within like 30 minutes, it would go, who, who, who. Like, you would make this noise. And everybody would turn and the cops would be like, come here and be like, no, man, I'm telling you. But what would happen is guys would lose their IDs. So if I had your ID, like, oh, your old lost.

So I'd lose my ID. You'd find it. Right. Keep it and go and eat. They issue you. another one. So, so Rees had like three IDs. Of course. And Reese would walk through with, so the first time, no big deal. You're using somebody else's ID. You clip it. You get your meal. He'd go, get whatever you wanted off. Get back in line. Go through again with his, with his real ID. Because if the guard recognized him, they'd be like, hey, let me see your ID. Didn't you just come through here? No. And they, yeah, you just came through here. He'd go, man, check the camera, but you know, they're not checking the camera. Right. And he's what you're talking about? I. I just walked in. They go, let me see you here again.

But that's like one out of 20 times. Right. But think about it. The guy that you used his ID, he got another ID issued, same number. So he might go through five minutes later and goes, whoop, whoop, go, goes, give me that tray. But I haven't eaten. I haven't eaten. Get out of here.

You're going to go to the shoe trying to go through twice. I didn't go through twice. What are you talking about? It's so horrible. And I'd be like, Reese, don't you feel bad? You're like, not I feel bad. What if he doesn't eat? Anyway,

does you want this other burger? But look, so. So first of all, so we'd get the cookies and the hot chocolate. Yes. So they would treat us like kids.

And of course, everyone got the treatment. Of course I went. And I went. Oh, me too. Me too. I always went. My favorite was one time

this guy was walking by one of the CEOs, because you know, the CEOs have to be like, this is pathetic. Like, don't these guys must feel like horrible. It's a steady stream.

Yeah, a line. It's like the line. It's just, it's like, dude. You're all walking there with your little treats. And everyone's walking back with the bag. And the COs, you know, they're all there. So what's funny is one time that one of the CEOs, I never forget this. The guy goes, he said, um, let's say the CEO's name was the sniper.

You know, they always nicknamed sniper. Like, and he'd be like, he'd be like, hey, sniper, what's up? He's like, uh, he said something. Uh, you want a cookie? Or he said, give me a, what did he say? Something. I forget like a, give me a ticket for. you a ticket for one of those cook for one of those whatever to give you i'll give you a cookie if you

let me use your cell phone for for five minutes or something like that joking around right the copy could be like why would i do that i can just go pull it out of your locker in 10 minutes and he was like oh man that hurt and he was like oh that's fucked up bro i was like so anyway yeah so that we would go back up and you'd eat your cookies if they made them that far Yeah, true. Drink your hot chocolate. Yeah, it was, so that was the first part of the Christmas celebration. That's the first one.

Yeah. The second part is they would pass out a Christmas bag. I think the Christmas bag came before the hot chocolate. I think it actually came on the same day. Yeah, you're right. It might have been my same day. I think they'd lock us down, pass out the Christmas bag, and then we'd come out and go get the hot chocolate and cookies.

Yeah. So what they do is they would actually give us a Christmas bag full of goodies. which were snacks and, like, candy, chips. My buddy, Christopher Doyle, they called him slow motion because he had a hernia. He used to call them exotics. They were stuff that you typically couldn't find on commissary. True. Right?

It was like, it would be something like, you know, like Cheetos, you know, but like hot Cheetos. Like they sold Cheetos. but they didn't sell hot Cheetos or there'd be some kind of different kind of alternative thing that you listen the first the first year I was there they gave out shower slides like they spent much like

and the bag was well the organization well and I think the money that they probably had at that time the bag was packed right tons of like Oreo cookies like multiple different like I mean all kinds of you know

chocolate bars Like, I've been all kind. You were like, I was like, this is insane. Delicious. How much they gave us. And I was like, and once again, I'm thinking, I can't believe that the prison gives this stuff out. And yet everybody that had been locked up three or four years before, for at least

the last three or four years, right. Complained. And I was like, this is insane. This is great. They're like, I know, man. Last year was twice as big. This is bullshit. And I'd be like, are you insane?

Look at all these snacks. They just gave it. This has got to be $100. It probably wasn't. No. It was probably, but to me, you know, this is probably 50 or 100 bucks worth of stuff. Like, they gave you shower slides. The shower slides are selling for $10 on commissary, you know?

Or, you know, they gave it two bags of Keefei coffee. That's $7. Do you know two years prior, we missed, they had given out a radio. A radio. And listen, according to Reese, they were given out two bags, bigger than that. Oh, they had given out clothes. They'd give out T-shirts. Yeah, but, like, 2005 was the end of, yeah, like 2006, 7, it was on a downward precipitous downward slide.

One, it's very obvious, like, once again, I was thrilled. Like, I was, I had no, I had such low expectations that when the food wasn't slop, I was like, wow, it's edible. You know, you were like, this is crap. This is that, and I was like, it's, what are you talking about? This is like, I don't eat, you know, beans or whatever, but you can eat those beans. Like, this is not what I thought at all. I, my version was Shawshank Redemption. That's what I thought.

I thought there would be weevils and stuff in our beans or in our food. What was that they picked out of his, uh, when he feeds it to the, he feeds it to the, the guy has. It was a bug. It was a bug in his oatmeal. Yeah. And he fed it to the little mouse. No, it was a bird. It was a bird.

The birdie had, he goes, you're going to eat that? He goes, no, and he gave it to him, and he fined it to a little bit. So, yeah, yeah. So how long did your Christmas bag last? Like, how long did you take you to eat? Did you eat it that day? Probably a couple of days. And we would trade with people.

I'd go, you know, you have peanuts. Like, it's like, okay, I don't like these peanuts. But I like, I like candy bars. Like, I'll take the, give you the peanuts. You're right. You trade the whoppers for the snicker bar or something like that. Yes. Yeah.

And then some of these guys would walk around. They were begging for, like they was like their favorite snack and they were like bro i'll give you three of these for your such and such oh yes the barter yeah the infamous barter that goes on in where things like become a value you have to trade them off depending on who you're dealing with and you get a great deal and people would comment on the deal like you what did you what did you give for that nutty bar oh yeah they they they they gave them the peanuts i would have given you this for that yeah like what are you thinking i would have given you a book of stamps

Right. That's 10 bucks. I know. Like, what are you thinking, bro? You could have gave that. So you get, you get judged on the party. So I never wanted to eat my Christmas bag until Christmas. Oh, okay. So I would never touch it. That's nuts. I know. Mine half was halfway gone. I have a mental block going on. And I'm like, I'm not going to eat this. Half of mine would be gone that day. That day, you would just smack it down. I watch people do that. I watch people do that. I watch people do. do that just you know but I always got to because once mine's gone I'm like I'm once mine's gone I'm once mine's gone I'm like I want some more of that you know what I'm saying where can I get another one and bartered off

but so the Christmas bag was one thing did you know people who sold their Christmas bag oh yeah yeah guys would sell it what was the rate I don't know was it a flat book yeah I was going to say no a couple flat books really yeah well it obviously went down as time went on. Right.

So before people would sell it. People were selling it for 20, 30 bucks. And then as time went on, you know, it's worth less and less because there's less and less stuff in it. Yeah, Christmas bag. I'll miss the Christmas bag. I miss the Christmas bag to them. I feel like telling Jess, I should, how funny would that be?

I go and I get a bunch of stuff and I make a Christmas bag for her. In a plastic, and you get it sealed? You know, you can get it sealed at the UP. yes door you can get a little thing of plastic and get it sealed oh my god that would be funny she would be like you'd be like hey i used to i used to think i used to think how funny would it be to show up at dinner with some guy and uh you know that you knew from prison and the waitress come over and say no no i got it bro and pull out a bunch of flat books and a bag of kifi you keep that honey that's for you you know the guy what would be like die laughing you keep that that's for you

I think it's funny I'm laughing now just thinking about the Christmas I think that would be like hilarious She's like honey She's like what is this anyway He's like it's got a lot in here shaking Are you freaking kidding?

What did you do? What did you do? Those are exotics. That's right They don't have that on commissary And get a commissary. You know my buddy, Nico sends me commissary lists

Oh really? He'll send me a commissary list Like you can click on it And you could print off a commissary list So I could put the commissary list in the bag with it. There you go. Just the...

So did you get a list? Like, what did they add on the comic? Because they had items on commissary for Christmas time. Oh, yeah. They had the... The only thing I remember, because they had a bunch of them. Like, maybe a bunch. I say a bunch, like five or six different things.

The only thing I remember was they had the little Christmas cakes. Do you know? Yes. It was like a... It was like a... What do they call them? Zingers? I get.

Zebra cakes. It's like the... Zebra cakes, but then they had... Christmas, the green and red. Yeah, and they looked, well, they were, they would have like a white frosting, and then they would have little green and red stripes on it, and it looked like a little. It looked like a Christmas ornament, and it was one of those soft cakes covered with the white chocolate. Yeah. You know, that gave me heartburn.

I have a sweet tooth, but though, I have a sweet tooth. Me too. That gave me heartburn, those, um, Christmas cakes. Yeah. I like the Christmas cookies. Um, I like when it came out with the candy. What? The Christmas candy.

Christmas candy What was the Christmas candy Peppermint bark Oh Peppermint bark What's I remember the peppermint sticks Yeah well that's candy canes

Candy canes Yeah But you never had the peppermint bark I don't remember I don't remember what it was You don't eat that now That you're free I'm gonna bring you some peppermint bar

Okay I don't know Oh delicious I remember the little cakes That's what you're stuck on the cakes Because I mean because I was, I really liked the case. What about the, the creamers? Oh, yeah, they had flavored creamers, yeah.

Flavored creamers. Yes. Which was, that was a treat. They were a real treat. Yeah. Then they would come out with like some, either like a fish or some type of tuna or something, a flavored meat. You know what I'm saying? Or another sausage.

You know, guys would like buy that stuff up. They'd be like, you know, bro, they'd max you out, maxed you out. Like some guy would end up with like 40 or 50 or 60. of them is. Right. With the cookies, the cakes, they'd have some different types of candy. You know, like I said, the peppermint bark and things like that. They'd have some hard candy. I don't think they ever had peppermints because they never had the candy canes, but they'd have some kind of different hard candy that was good. And they'd have the creamer and they'd have some type of meat. So, I mean, it wasn't, I guess the selection of commerce

that wasn't that big of a deal, but I mean, it's the Christmas items. It wasn't a big deal to me because I just never had like any money like I didn't spend so little money on commissary like there was never there was really it wasn't toward the until I started optioning getting like options and making money that I actually spent any money on commissary like and even then what I would consider spending money on commissary most people would be like are you serious you ate out of the child hall most of the time almost all almost exclusively out the chow hall came out i walked out of prison i weighed 149 pounds wow yeah so i mean right now i weigh 179 oh wow yeah so just eating the the chow hall food no do whopping just whatever they had

well i mean i also i was trying to lose weight so i mean i maintained for whatever for let's say 11 years i maintained probably 175 pound weight just eating out the out of the and you know i ate i drank You know, Kiki coffee, and I drank Kramer, and I, you know, use sweetener because there was no sugar. They removed all the sugar from the compound. Yeah. So, but other than that, I very seldom, like, I might buy, God, bro, I'm really almost bought, not. I buy a couple candy bars, and then what else would I buy? God, really, almost nothing.

Like you didn't buy soups? Oh, no, yeah, I definitely bought chips. I definitely bought soups. Very seldom did I buy chips. If I did, I would buy chips. I would buy I know what else they had

the jalapino the poppers Yeah I can't see But I can't One I don't like hot stuff So I would buy like Cheetos The problem with me buying a bag

Of Cheetos is It might last two days Oh wow And that was a bag That wasn't a little bag That was like a bag So it was like this is not good But what I typically do

Is you know You get the And I didn't have to buy a coffee And creamer Because I taught the real estate class And those guys Would give me coffees And creamer

So I remember you said I just get me a coffee And a creamer and I'll sign you in. Yeah. You know, and they'd bring you a coffee. You're like, all right, I got you.

Oh, I'd have tons of them. I have like 30 or 40 coffees and creamers in there. Be packed, packed. You know, of course, it dwindles throughout the semester. Then it's like, well, I need this semester to end. A semester's only 90 days, right? Yeah, but I was, I was drinking a lot of them. I drank at least four cups a day, at least four, maybe five cups a day.

Yeah, so that's a, all right, anyway, I won't get into the spoon. I mean, how heaving of a spoon for a lot. I don't, I'm not a fan of coffee. I drink it's a, Keep me awake. Oh, okay. Especially coffee. I'm just eating out of the bag.

You might just... Keefe? You know, do you ever use something? The ice coffee in there? Yeah, guys would make... Listen, there were guys that it was almost Starbucks in there. Amen. Frappuccinos and they'd whip it.

They'd actually be people be standing around whipping it up. Yeah. Frappes. But, all right, so we were talking about the... So you were on your second one, which was the bag. The bag. But I want to go back to the... If I can for a moment, to just...

just eating the prison food to lose weight on the diet. I had a question about that. So when you, did you ever get seconds or you just ate whatever they gave you? I ate whatever they ate. If I wanted to eat, like some of the stuff, I just didn't eat. Like it was like, it was just not good.

Like liver. You know, we talked about this, I think. I thought they stopped serving liver. When I was there, there was liver. So they would give you liver like, I don't eat liver. I can't eat it. Other guys would come. And then I'd have, you'd get the liver.

you'd come and I'd eat like the green beans and then guys who'd sit there and I'd say does anybody want my liver and there'd be five guys oh I'll take it cocks I'll take it okay I'm like Jesus like they would love to eat it it was like oh it's disgusting so there'd be stuff like that and and you know or they'd give you you know tofu they call what chicken burgers like they weren't you know or they give you the chicken patty like there were some decent chicken pat if they deep fried the chicken bag then it was just some of it was just disgusting yeah but I typically ate towards the end I would eat breakfast, because that's the best meal really is breakfast, and it's not great.

No. But you would get, like, hard-boiled eggs. You get a couple hard-boiled eggs, and you'd get maybe oatmeal and something else that I can't even remember it was so whatever. And then you eat that, and then for lunch, you know, maybe three days out of the week, you'd have a good meal. Like, you'd have fried chicken, or you'd have hamburgers and french fries, or you'd have, like, wow, that's good. And I would eat that. Because you can't snack if you don't have anything in your locker throughout the day. So you're not snacking.

And then dinner was, we're not great meals. No. You know? They were kind of flimsy. Lunch was really the, the, the, the, the main meal of the day. Yes, that's the main meal with lunch. Yes. And that's the one that was the hottest and the most organized and the most people went to.

Yeah. Dinner was sporadic. Yes. You know, and sometimes you go in that child hall and you're like, what? What do they have it? Is nobody going? Yeah, nobody was either. You know what I'm saying?

And then sometimes you go and they give you two corn dogs. And I mean, it was lined up. The line was like wrapped around the building. It was. Yeah, the hot dog, the hot dog meal, yes. You remember corn dogs when they had that? Oh, they stopped doing the corn dogs. But yeah, the hot dog, yes.

I remember that. Anything that they made that wasn't in the prison was delicious. Yes. Every once in a while they would have like the, Remember the big cookies? Oh, yes. In the package? In the package.

And they had like the, they had the red velvet, white chocolate chips. Guys were ready to stab each other. I was ready to, I was contemplating violence. It was so good. They were the big, the big, oh, they'd have the big. They went oldest Stuttermeyer. It was somebody else that was just as delicious. Macadamian, they'd have macadamian nuts in them and the big chunks of white chocolate.

Oh, man. That was so good. All right. That's enough. I'm out of here. I'm going to eat some neat. So, so, and then you have the, the Christmas or the holiday meal for Christmas. Yes.

Finally got to that point. All right. All right. So just like Thanksgiving, the holiday meal, when you get it, they would give you a bag dinner afterwards. Right. Generally, the holiday meal in federal prison for Christmas is the hen. Oh, yeah.

Is it the corner. So you get a whole small hen. Right. Well, sometimes, there were some, there were some, you know, holiday meals or Christmas meal for Christmas, where it was, like, there were, there were times when I got it and it was like, this is massive. And then there were times, you know, maybe a year later, you'd get one and it was like, it was, like, mine was on a diet. Yeah, you're like, this is a child. This is a little baby. horrible like but still you typically got so much stuffing and and and so many side things that it was

just like it was a meal that would fill you up and yes you were just like wow like this oh yeah because they had they had potatoes um i remember with the the oh wait wait wait a sour cream sour cream like they give you like a scoop of sour you didn't get a lot of sour cream you get like a scoop of it god it's so good so good because it was things that you were deprived of like all year round so obviously it was delicious so um but it was it was like you said it was a a great meal because they'd have bread they'd have some type of pie like maybe apple or they had a dessert they had a like two or three vegetables I remember they they would have green beans but they'd have some other vegetable I can't remember but it might have been the potato

but it was it was a very good healthy meal macaroni and cheese yeah yeah Yes, that's right. That's right. Good macaroni. Like where they didn't steal all the, all the cheese out of the chow hall. Like somebody was guarding the cheese. It was delicious. Christmas is a, is a one of the better, like I enjoy that meal better than a Thanksgiving meal.

But it's a very delicious meal. Same thing with the bartering. People, because I've known people who sold their whole tray. Right. Like they'll go, I'll sell you the Christmas meal tray. Yeah. People like, really? Yeah, I'll give you whatever.

Give people like four soups for the Christmas. That's nuts, bro. For four soups? I wouldn't dare give you anything for four soups. Like, give me like a book of stamps, bro. Like I talked to a guy in the unit, like, oh, I just needed it. No, I think he did it for a book of stamps. Yeah, I wouldn't even do that because to me, I'm eating out of the chow hall.

I don't have any money. Yes. So, yeah, and then he would. Even when I had money, I just almost refused to buy stuff out of there, you know? Out of the commissary? Yeah. You weren't like Reese that Reese was living his life in prison

Reese was okay with being in prison Like he was he wanted to get out Of course everybody wants to get out But he was making He was really hanging out And it's like I'm this is part of my life And this is where I'm at And he was an avid reader

Reese was brilliant He really was I always always and I've told I think they call him My sister I thought We talked about you a couple days ago He called me Yeah he called me out of the blue

And we talked he um he told me that um i'm sorry i was talking to my sister and i every time he comes up i it just kills me it's like like what a ruin this guy's life has been as a result of drugs this is a guy who can he can tell you how many sherman tanks were were manufactured where they fought in in um the european plane um which manufacturers made the Sherman Tank because he'll say, when I know, you're thinking that General Motors made all of them, but that's

not true. Actually, 1,122 of them were actually manufactured by GM. Now, and he'll sit there and explain the whole thing. He'll tell you about Liberty Ships, how this section of the Liberty Ship was built in here. And the way they put them together was they actually transported them. I mean, he should have been

a, he should have been a professor teaching at a university. Right. He's so filled with knowledge about history. Yes. And yet. And he has the hair. He has the hair.

He has the hair of a professor. He does. He does. He's got the long gray, blonde hair. The bald in here, but the long hair down. And it's, it's, it's wavy. It's got that. And he has the snippiness.

Like his, his comebacks and lines. Super short. Are perfect for whatever you might throw at him, just like a professor. yeah yeah he's great oh so yeah that's what you want to do huh oh sorry oh my god um yeah he was oh your little crab you're gonna yeah he always has these little say beautiful comebacks beautiful comeback and we argued politics beautifully that's what i was thinking i need to call him up and argue politics he would be funny um so yes and and you know what that's what makes this difficult because we definitely need reese here to tell us about the christmas

He could tell you. Exactly. And he could tell you from when he first got there. Yes. Because I remember he said when he first got to prison, he was, I got to prison, got there, got a pack of cigarettes, was sitting outside smoking cigarettes, had a cup of coffee, had, was eating a something bar or whatever. And he said, looking around, thinking to myself, I can do 20 here. I can do 20. Oh, my goodness.

Did he remember he got 23? Remember what happened with Reese? No. Reese was... Quick side note. Reese was locked up. Had pled guilty. Got 23 years.

Got 23 years. And he's sitting in a prison cell one day with this kid that was in his... A kid that was in his unit. Right. And he said, we went and he... Reese had just gotten like pled guilty, something. And the kid had gone to plead guilty or something. I don't even think he pled guilty.

I think he was being debriefed. And they put him in a holding cell. And this Mexican, they put a bunch of people in there, and this Mexican walks and sits down right in front of him. And the kid looked up and he said, I should, he said, I thought he was going to piss himself. Kid looked up, stared at the guy, and the guy goes, let me tell you something.

He said, your name is on my witness list. He is, if your name doesn't come off my witness list, he is, I'm going to send people to 105 Robinson Street. which was where his mother lived. He said, and I'm going to have them take your mother and your sister, and they're going to take them out. And he just started describing what they were going to do, like, his mother and sister. And the guy was like, he's like, I don't know why.

I told them I wouldn't cooperate. I told him I wouldn't. And Reese was just sitting there. He said, I'm just sitting there like I don't even hear the conversation. He said, now, when they start taking everybody off to their, you know, respective, you know, holding facilities or like, you know, to your, to the, the marshal holdover where you're at or where he's at. Right.

When they remove him, the guy's like, oh, my God, oh, my God. So he's freaking out. Well, when they get back to the unit, the kid, he goes, he couldn't really read or write that well, right? Like, he's 19 or 20. He goes to Reese and says, I need you to help me write a letter to the prosecutor, telling him, I don't want to be a witness. So Reese is telling him, look, that guy's not going to do nothing.

He's like, you don't understand. You don't know who these people. are. He'll kill my sister and my, you don't know, and he'll do what they'll do. So, Reese goes, I'll write the letter. So he writes the whole letter for the kid, and they send it off. And Reese said, I didn't think anything else of it. Got to prison, got some commissary. He's sitting there smoking a cigarette, everything. He said, it was about, about two months, maybe three months. He said, one day's on the, on the packout. So I look at him, you're on the packout. I'm like, what the hell? Which the packout list means they're transporting. They're moving you.

right you gotta pack your stuff up show up tomorrow morning at r and d we're moving you and he was like man and he said he thought he had an out this is how silly it is he thought he had an outstanding warrant for like a DUI or something right and he thought that they were bringing him back for that as if they would in federal prison like they don't get my shit that you got a warrant they're not moving yet right so but he didn't know he's the first time he's been in federal prison so he goes he packs this stuff out he goes they bring me all the way back to to the U.S. Marshal's holdover or to the county jail, whatever, in Tampa. He said, and then one day, like four or five days after he's been there, they put him on, they say, hey, you're going in the bus.

So they take him, put them in the little van, and they move him, they bring them to the U.S. Or they bring them to the U.S. attorney's office. He's thinking of the courthouse. He's thinking, like, what is going on? He doesn't know why. He's like, I don't know why I'm here. Why would they be bringing me to federal court? He goes, I'm thinking, am I getting re-indicted?

What happened? No lawyer came to talk to him, nothing. He said, they bring him to the U.S. attorney's office. The marshals walk him into a conference room, sit him down. He goes, I sit down. And he said, a couple minutes later, he said, the U.S. attorney walks in, an assistant U.S. attorney walks in. And the guy walks in, he looks at him, and he goes, he said, listen, six months ago,

you were in a holding facility with a kid named for a limited time at McDonald's enjoy the tasty breakfast trio your choice of chicken or sausage McMuffin or McGrittles with a hash brown and a small iced coffee for five bucks plus tax available until 11 a.m. at participating McDonald's restaurants price excludes flavored iced coffee and delivery

Tommy whatever you know and he's like okay he said there were eight other people in that room he said you're the only you and Tommy and one other guy are the only people

that speak English all the other guys spoke Spanish he didn't realize like there's just a bunch of Spanish guys Mexican guys that were in there

with him and he said there was a conversation between Tommy and one of the Mexicans in English he was and you were there did you hear the conversation

and he goes yeah I heard the conversation he was as a matter of fact he said when Tommy got back he wanted me to write a letter, taking him off your witness list, and I'm the one that wrote the letter because Tommy can't read or write very well. He said, so he had me write it. And he said, the U.S. attorneys all eyes were like, whoa. And he goes, so do you know what happened during that

conversation? He was what, he's what, and the other, the Mexican guy's name, whatever, Carlos, you know, Rodriguez or whatever. He's like, what did Rodriguez say to him? And he goes, what do you want him to have said? And he goes, don't screw with me. He goes, don't. The prosecutor goes, don't screw with me, man. He goes, what did he say? He said, all right, calm down. He said, listen. He was, you going to take care of me? You going to help me out? And he goes, yeah, I'm going to help you out. He said, I will make sure you get taken care of. He said, okay, he said, he said, gave him his mother's address and told him if his name didn't come off that witness list within the next week. He was going to send some guys to his mother's house. He was going to kidnap his mother and his sister. And then. they were going to rape and murder them and leave their bodies like whatever in the trunk of a car or somewhere in a parking lot or whatever whatever he said and he's like and he's like will you testify that in court he said absolutely is if you're going to take care of me he says i promise you i will get he said i will take care make sure you're okay and he goes okay so wreaths leaves he said

listen a week later i'm on a bus i go back to coleman he's i unpack my stuff again i'm getting situated. He said one day, he said, three to six months later, he's, I'd forgot, I think he might have said it was almost a year later. He'd forgot, he's, I'd forgotten all about it. So six or eight months later, whatever, he goes, I forgot all about it. He said, one day, I'm on the packout. Now I'm thinking, what is? He's like, this is ridiculous. He goes, it must be the DUI thing. Again, he said, he was, because I wasn't really, I didn't know how, I just figured I get a letter. Right. He goes, nope, go back. Three days later, four days later, they say get in the van. He gets in the van. He gets in the van. They bring him to the courthouse. Goes in the courthouse. He said, I get waddle in to the courtroom. He said, the prosecutor's sitting right there. Somebody else is sitting with him. And he said, I'm standing there. He said, there's a lawyer sitting here. Says, I'm your lawyer. I'm representing you. He's like, okay. And, you know, says, talking to you.

Never talked to him. And he said, they said, you know, you're here for a sentence reduction. He's like, okay, cool. A sentence reduction? What did you think they were going to do? Well, I thought it was the trial. No. It's almost empty.

No, the guy pled guilty. He didn't know any of this, though. Rees didn't. No, Reese said, that's what the guy said. They said, look, you agree to cooperate with somebody. The guy ended up pleading guilty. He said, so they never had to call you, but they put in for a rule 35. U.S. Attorney stands up, judge comes in, stands up, said Mr. Reese Towns in here. He agreed to do this,

he helped us with our case, agreed to cooperate. Luckily, we didn't have to within a week or two, you know, whatever, blah, blah, blah. And we want to reduce his sentence. We want to give him, whatever, three, four level reduction, which brings him from 23 years down to 16 years. And he goes, and he said, he said, yeah, Judge goes, okay, cool, boom. And he said, the U.S. attorney turned to him. He goes, told you I take care of you. And he said, said, all right. Oh, no, I remember the judge said this to him. The judge said, because Reese says to say this all the time, he's fucking cry me up. He goes, it was a female judge. And he said, she looked at him and she said, Mr. Townsend, I'd like you to know.

We appreciate you helping the prosecutor out. And also, you know, I'm going to reduce your sentence to, you know, 16 years, just like they requested. And you can come back here and see me as often as you want. You're going to be in prison. if you hear anything you can come back here as often as you want and he said I've been trying to see that woman ever since which never because you used to say the all the time and I'd heard he said it like 10 times I used to laugh every time I've been trying to see her remember he'd take his hat off

I've been trying to yeah I've been trying to see that woman ever since so funny so wow yeah so that was that's Reese that was yeah from 23 down to 16, you know, and did all 16. I wonder why my luck was never that before. I know. You know, I got a buddy Donovan. I talked to every once in a while.

And because, you know, he knows the Wilson thing, right? Right. And Wilson at one point, only for like a month or two, was actually my cellie. And so Wilson, you know, so like the whole time I knew Wilson for like two years, for like two months he was my celly. So Donovan always said, I'm like, hey, Donovan, what's going on? He's like, I don't know, bro, I just can't seem to get a good sally. I just, I'm trying to get one. He's like, well, I said, one that he can put something together on.

He goes, he's not everybody can have a, can, and not everybody gets a celly like Wilson. Like, oh, my, stop. And he laughs and like, okay, so put that aside. Which was a good story. It was funny there, right? Wait, I have one more story. All right. Okay.

The other story is. This is my Christmas story. My Christmas story is we had this guy who was an orderly named Billy. Billy was a piece of garbage. Just didn't want to do anything. Didn't really. I don't know how he became the head orderly. He was just a piece of garbage.

So. You don't even get me with head orderly stories, but go ahead. So he was bald. He was a biker. He had like a Foo Manchu mustache, fat, six foot tall. It's just a douchebag. So one day. so it was maybe a week before Christmas.

Right. And I was like, where is the, where is the, where's the Christmas tree? Like, they didn't put up the Christmas tree. Do you remember they used to put up a Christmas tree? Oh, yes. At the low and the medium, I remember they put up Christmas tree. Yeah, each unit had a, like when we first got in there, they had a decorating contest. Right, right. The unit that decorated the best would win pizza.

Yeah, they still did. They still did at the low, too. But this was at the low. And so they had put up a Christmas tree every year I'd been there. This is like the last year I was there. Right. And so I went, I said, Billy, where's the Christmas tree? He's like, I told Jenkins, I told Jenkins, Jenkins was a counselor.

And I told Jenkins, I wasn't going to put it up. Nobody wants to see that thing. Nobody wants that tree up. And I went, I want to see the tree up. And he's like, the fuck, you want to see the tree up where I go, because I live here. like I mean I'm not one of these guys who's like oh this is a temporary thing temporary it's been almost 13 years ain't temporary bro I live here where do you I live in B3 B4 and I want a tree right in B3 view right I like to see it right you know because what was nice about it was when

they shut the lights off and they would leave the lights on the Christmas tree so the lights in the unit are off you could see the blinking of the lights and look it's not you know it's you're so little like it's it's one of those things where where a guy stabs another guy because he took two of his magazines or because he took his brush and people are like you must be a savage to stab someone over a brush but that brush is five or six dollars and that's a lot in prison and you can't let people steal from you in prison or everybody starts taking your stuff and so you cannot use the values of what you hold valuable in the free world to what's

valuable in incarceration. So is a brush worth getting stabbed over? Maybe. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm not a violent person, but maybe. You're not stealing from me. Right. So and there are some people who are like, yeah, the guy took my shoes. Those shoes cost me 40 bucks. Is that worth me finding the guy and beating them in the head with a lock? Yeah. Yeah, it is. So I was like, no, bro, I want to see that. Like I liked that i remember i liked it laying in bed and seeing those lights on flashing like that right it was it was

a little bit of feeling of christmas that you could feel you know just a little bit the remnants of it left yes so i told me and billy was like billy was like ah no nobody wants to see that i said i do and so i i said no i said you're putting up the tree bro he's no i'm not i said yeah watch this i go into jenkins and i say hey i said i want billy to put up the tree i said i'll put up the tree i said i'll put up the tree. Right. And she goes, Matt, Billy said nobody wants that. I said, Billy, Billy's a liar.

I said, I want the tree. And she was training somebody, our new counselor, which is amazingly, only, was just as useless as she was. So, Agarred was her name. Agar. So I was like, Jenkins, I was like, come on, I want the tree. And she goes, all right, Cox, here's what I'll do. And she thought it was funny, right?

She says, here's what I'd do. You get, I'm leaving in the next. Hour. She says, you get as many people in the unit to come ask me. And if it's enough people, and I think that the most of the unit wants the tree, then I'll, then tomorrow I'll have Billy give you the box and you can put it up. I said, all right. Now we're talking. There you go. Listen, I went around and was asking everybody. And guys are like, I'm not doing that. I was like, what? What's wrong with you, bro? It's like, you know, how many times do you ask me to do this? How many times did you ask me to go read your legal work? How many times did you? I didn't say, fuck, go fuck yourself. I said, oh, Christ, Cox. I go, just go knock on the door and say, I want a Christmas tree and walk away. I must have had 20 or 30 fucking dudes. 20 or 30 out of 180 guys.

And half the unit wasn't even in there. You know, half of the guys I just wouldn't ask because I was like, hey, I was wondering if you could, what's up? And I was like, er, nothing. You're not a Christmas tree person.

I can sense it. And I walk away. So, but most of the guys were like, and I went into the cracker box and it was like, come on, man, I'm asking you guys. did and they were like oh come on i was like come on and so they would guys would walk over i'd like a christmas tree or cox wants a christmas tree they'd be like she'd

be like all right all right so i did i did get the christmas tree i put up the lights uh i i i i yeah it was all me had to do everything some guys maybe they helped i don't think i don't remember anybody helping jerks um yeah yeah had the little flashing lights yeah it was good times because that's my Christmas story. Are you putting a tree in the house, by the way? Here? Yeah. Yeah, but we're waiting to go get a real one. No, I want the tree right after Thanksgiving. No, I'm getting it right after. Okay, all right. Yeah. If it was up to Jess, Jess would have gone and got it. I said, no, no, no, you got to go after Thanksgiving. Okay, all right. Give me on, we waited so long last time, we got a tree that half of it was missing. And Jess was like, well, we'll put it up against the wall and it's fine. No, no, no. You have to get a real tree? Is that what you get? Yeah, I. Oh my

But yeah, last year. And I was like, no, no, I'll fix it. She says, how? I go, don't want, I got you. I got it. Trust me. So you know what I did? What?

I cut off random branches on the really thick side, took my drill and drilled into the thing, sharpened them off and stuck them in there. Listen, that thing, that was, that tree was awesome when I was, and by the way, they grow. It's not like they're dead. When you stick them in, you're sticking a live limb into the live, and you put it in the thing. We got in the water. In the water, everything. Oh, wow. Yeah, we had, listen, it was, it wasn't tall.

It was like five foot tall, right? It wasn't, but we don't want a big tree. I might get a bigger tree this year. Yeah, I'm thinking like one right there and hang out. That's where we put it right over there, right where that wall is. I'm thinking like in between the kitchen and the doorway to closet, like right there. Maybe, maybe. I like it.

I like it. It's nice. I like Christmas. I love Christmas. All right. So that, that's a. Remember last year? When I was sending out, I was sending, even Colby knows, I would send out people Christmas carols in the morning.

Every morning I wake up five or six and I would send 30 or 40 people. Oh, that's right. No, no, no. I got out the day before Christmas and I didn't get a carol. No, I sent them all December long. But I got out the day. Oh, I didn't have a phone until after Christmas. Well, you were in all throughout December.

I didn't get one. Because you didn't get out until you just said Christmas. I got out the day. I got out the day. before Christmas Eve. Well, then how would you have gotten it all December long? I didn't get one after Christmas is what I'm saying. You didn't even have a, I'm the one that got you your cell phone.

Exactly, but that was right after Christmas. Yeah, well, that was your Christmas present. What about the Carol? So, listen, I shoot them all the time, right? Shot them all the time, right? Like, I'm, then I found out later, like, some people blocked me. I actually got a, I got a text message from one person who said, listen. She said, I was sending them to this guy and his girlfriend, right? I won't say

you there. And I got a, I get a text from her saying, listen, both me and Jeff, we sleep, we don't wait. We're not early risers. Also, we have elderly parents. So we can't put our cell phones on silent because we have family members that may need us. So you're sending us stuff at five in the morning. She said, and we're not Christmas people either. So we don't really enjoy the Christmas music. I am asking you to not send any more Christmas music to either one of us. And I think, I feel like it was a polite way of saying it, but it just came off really, really. Condescending?

Yeah, and aggressive and angry and condescending. Even though I can't read it and think, like, it came off rude. Now, granted, I feel like that would have been a phone call I would have made. Hey, listen, like, I didn't want to because, you know, I felt like, and I have, but I've had so many people that, and keep on, these are random Christmas songs. They're not for everybody. But I've had so many people who have sent me text saying, bro, like, I love getting these these things. Like every morning I wake up, it's five in the morning, six in the four, I'll wake up at

seven o'clock, roll over, see that you sent me a text, hit the button, boom, it starts playing Christmas music. Like, my wife and I love this. Like, me and my girl love this. Or, hey, man, I listen. Like, honestly, I don't know. Yeah, you know, I love Christmas. I love Christmas music. Right. And so I've had so many people that have said that. And then other people are like, bro, why are you sending me these songs? I like, I always kills me when they're like, why are you sending me these songs? Well, well, I mean, you were doing it for the different reactions, right? No, it was, it was just, I was saying, hey, it's, it's December. Like, it's Christmas.

I love Christmas, too. I send them out. I think that that's nice that I'm thinking, hey, you might like this one. I do too, but everybody's reaction is not going to be the same. I know. Well, some people are just scrooge's. They really are. All right.

So the last part of the holiday and the last meal is New Year's Day. New Year's Eve in prison sucks. it's treated like any other day the attitude among the people most of the people I knew came and got my allergy pills because they didn't want to hear like they go I don't want to be

anything close to conscious it's almost like they don't want to be there at the turnover it really is almost like they don't want to be there you know this is not right it's like just negative yeah deal with

what you got to deal with. Yeah, this is what it is. Completely, completely sober, deal with it. So most of the time, I, like I said, somebody come and say, how many of those allergy pills you got? Because I don't want to hear all that hooping and hollering at midnight. I would, when I would sleep in that, so in the, the, the, the low, you never, you never went to a low. No. Couldn't behave yourself long enough. So, listen. Tusha. So loud. So loud. So loud. You used a hundred and, in general. Like, I slept.

I used to try and sleep with the ear plugs in. Remember they used to buy the ear plugs? Yes. You used to try and sleep with those and did that for about two, three weeks one time. And I got an ear infection. I've never had an ear infection in my life. Air infections are no joke. No.

Especially in prison. They don't want to help you at all. No. Then what I found. Training and everything is horrible. What I finally did was I took, you know how you got two sheets, not two blankets. I rolled one of the blankets up and I would lay on it and, wrap it around my head. So I'm literally, I'm like in a cocoon laying there. And that's what I did.

I had a cocoon. And you couldn't hear anything. Somebody would walk up and they'd have to, you know, people don't want to touch you when you're sleeping. They walk up and poke me once or twice for me to and I, oh, he's alive. Yeah. But I couldn't hear anything with that, with that get up on. It took me, took me a while to really get it down to where you can tune it all out. You can tune it all out. Because it sucks. It does suck. Are we talking New Year's Not just in general. New Year's Eve was just the same thing. Like, I don't even remember. Maybe I woke up with everybody. Happy New Year! Happy New Year! And it would cut off just like that, everybody is. And the New Year's Day meal was black eyed peas and steak. Yeah. Or what they called steak. It's some type of beef. A lot of time it was a hamburger. But it was a special meal and you got to say. sack lunch for dinner.

I like the sack lunch. You keep being upset about it. You seem upset about it. You either got peanut butter and jelly or you got bologna and a piece of cheese. Yes. And I like bologna. Two pieces of bologna.

Yeah. I like bologna sandwiches. I like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. No? Yeah, well, I mean. You're not a fan. I'm not a huge fan. And you got a little bag of chips.

And some cookies. Yeah, usually a little packet of cookies. I never saw the chips Yeah You never got a little bag of chips No we get the cookies You get the sandwich and the cookies I never remember

You either get one or the other really So I mean it's it You know But that would be our New Year's That's how we'd bring in New Year's Day We'd get that meal at lunch With the Black IPs It's supposed to be good luck

And celebrate And that would be the three meal combo Over those Month and a half or whatever Yeah To round out the year. Yeah, November, December,

is tough on dieting. Yeah. In prison. A lot of guys dieting in prison, you know, trying to get their figure right. And that's a tough, those are tough months. It's a tough month. So we're, we're going to let them, I guess, let them know that we're thinking about them, you know, doing the podcast.

Poor Donovan. I know. Brandy for it. I feel like, I feel bad. Who's brandy? A friend that I knew before I went in, but she had meth problems then, and now she caught a meth case.

And so she gets out in 2035. Oh. Oh. Those numbers are brutal, man. Brutal. Was it like manufacturing or just selling? And she's got a bunch of charges. Is she already

off the chart? Bro, she's one that got like, long story short, she was in the there was two conspiracies she's in the middle and her lawyer convinced her to plead guilty to her own conspiracy by herself yeah he kind of basically came to her I don't know exactly what he told her because I've asked her a couple of times but he's kind of saying like they don't exactly know where you fit in this so you're going to plead

guilty to your own. He's going to draw up a written indictment. He's going to write it out. He's not even going to be an indictment. It's going to be a complaint, and you're going to plead guilty to the complaint, saying that you were in a conspiracy with multiple people to sell meth. Has she been sentenced? Oh, yeah.

Okay. Yeah, it's over. Lawyers, just like mine, they just give, like at some point, they're kind of like, you know, I mean, I guess you have to. you know, crack a couple of eggs to get an omelette. Yeah, no. No, it's a learning's curb, and some people have to do a life sentence for me to learn. Do you, by chance, remember Absin?

No. I mean, I'm really bad with names, though. Never mind, because you didn't know him. He was at the pen. Oh, okay. He was the only person I know that played guilty to a life sentence. Why wouldn't you just go to trial? On drugs.

Yeah, they tricked him. So, I mean, it's just, this was a holiday podcast. Oh, yeah, yeah. Let's keep it holiday-ish. Holiday. And happy. Merry Christmas. Yes.

And to all a good night. So I appreciate you guys watching. Do me a favor. Hit the subscribe button. Hit the bell so you get notified of videos just like this. Leave me a comment in the comment section. Please consider joining my Patreon and buying my book. make a great Christmas present.

It would. Even though this is even though I think Colby's going to release this Christmas Eve. Really? You are? You can download it. It's on audible and an electronic version. See ya.