Matthew Cox | Inside True Crime Podcast - Dark Web Dealer on Escaping Death, Mental Hospital, and Addiction

Episode Date: March 31, 2024

Dark Web Dealer on Escaping Death, Mental Hospital, and Addiction

I wasn't on a bus. They made a special van, come to my house, pick me up, and deliver me to school. I wasn't by any other kids. They put me by myself. I think they said it was dead for six or seven minutes. Now, in this mental hospital, there's people. They have schizophrenia, bipolar. I had never had this problem before.

I had never thought about jumping over counters, robbing place. I never thought about that. apparently i i did it oh how they got this this angle of literally being like right next to me right stuff like that but eventually it went more into allegedly going online and ordering these it's a good to see the difference i made and honestly i never thought i'd make it this far i never thought I became hopeless eventually but it's not like I felt hopeless because like once you starts telling enough lies you really start believing yourself you really start to convince yourself that it is okay or you're like you actually you're fine like you really tell lie enough

you really do believe it listen I know that exactly because I've like I've run into people that I used to, you know, commit crimes with and talk to them, you know, and you're talking to them. I've had these conversations where they're like, well, you did this and you did that and you did this. And I'm like, well, wait a minute. I mean, I understand, but you knew that. No, I had no idea. I was like, what are you talking about? You wrote the real estate contract. You're the one that, you know, you're the one that went to the title company with me. You're the one that, you know, that that put the money in the bank, they deposit it. You're the one that increased the sales price.

You're the one that you start going through it. You can see it in their face where they start to, the look on their face is like, holy shit. Like, you knew the whole time this person didn't even exist. You made about $40,000 on that. If you didn't know what was fraud, why did I give you $40,000? Like, what are you talking about? And you can see it in their face.

And it's like, wow, you've been lying so long. you really believe that you weren't involved in the fraud. Like you were actively representing people that did not exist on a fraud scheme and you made hundreds of thousands of dollars. And then you went and you told the FBI I didn't do anything wrong. You blamed everything on me, which I get. But you've been lying to everybody you know this whole time that you weren't involved. And you actually now you look and you can see it in their face where they're just. just like, yeah, bro, you know what?

I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to talk to you. And they just like walk off. They'll like storm off. You can see that realization in their face when they realize, holy shit. And how many times have you met a friend from 20 years ago or 10 years ago and said, hey, remember we were at that party and this happened and that happened? They're like, or that wasn't Jimmy. That was Todd. And you're like, no, it was Jimmy.

And they're like, no, Todd was Todd, remember? We drove with him and this happened. And then suddenly you're like, holy shit. plus Todd. You would have sworn on a stack of Bibles. It was Jimmy. I mean, people's, our minds are, are very fucking

complex, man. There they are. So let's, let's start like at the, at the very, you know, at the beginning, like you were, I know you told me a little bit about it last night. Like you had a, your parents are non-traditional.

So, you know what I'm saying? That's a good, you know what I'm saying? They're not, you know, they're um um they're both deaf right both of them are deaf yeah so did you where were you born did you have any siblings yeah so i have i was born in milwaukee wisconsin um it's not it's a pretty big city um it's one i'm pretty sure it's in the top 10 um most dangerous cities I don't really think it's all that dangerous, but I mean, I grew up in it with both parents in the household. I have a half-brother and a sister.

I'm the youngest. My half-brother's the oldest. We're all three years apart. But I consider him my full brother because his dad really didn't, like, wasn't in the picture. And he was always living with us. So he's really my brother. But legally, he's my half-brother. So I have a brother and a sister.

My sister's three years older than me. My brother is three years older than her. And I just turned 22 two months ago. So I'm only, I'm just turned 22. So I know I look a lot older. I'm not sure what to say. No, you don't. Yeah, I said too.

When I grow up, when I grow all my beard, people tell me I'm 35, 40, I'm like, sheesh, that's harsh. That is rough. Oh, yeah, that's bad. But so I grew up in a regular household, went to public schools. My parents are deaf. But to me, like, that's, that's normal. It's a disability. My parents never went on to disability. They both worked. My mom is a, language teacher so obviously perfect job for her and my dad was a mechanic for a while and then he kind of had to stop doing that because you kind of need to listen to the sounds of that and then he he kind of like was jobless for a long time and we were just living on my mom's income so we were kind of this was when I was like younger and like three four years old so we didn't have that much money then but then as i got older maybe like 10 we finally got to move like out of Milwaukee but just to a suburb outside of it so i was still close to it but i wasn't in it so like my and my dad started getting other jobs and stuff and like that that only became like

middle class so like i guess i really grew up kind of more but that i don't remember that because was so young and then like after like 10 or so we became like middle class and everything was going good and went to normal public schools and high schools so i guess to start my story i guess i should start the first time i ever did anything was um was weed and i did it one time i did it one time with my aunt when I was 10 years old right when we had first moved out of Milwaukee. She had had some.

Right. So I smoked it for one time and then I didn't do it again. But I started right away at that age to pick up and buy it. And I started slowly

getting into working my way until like, because I knew people that were using. So I started to put one plus one on my head. If I can get it for cheaper and give it to them. I can make a little money. I'm a young kid. I can't even work. I'm lazy. So I'm trying to, you know, cheat, find the best way to get money as I can. So that goes on. Who are you? And you're telling this to what like other like kids? at school that you go to school with or friends kids at school and another big thing that

helped once I got to a little bit older like 14 15 once I entered high school the huge thing that helped is I'm a freshman my sister's a sophomore at the same high school and so now I have I know, you know, throughout, I'm hanging out with her friends. You have two groups of friends. Two groups of people. Right. And my sister kind of hated that I was hanging out with her friends. She really didn't like it, made her feel some type of way about it.

But she was also doing the same thing for a little bit, but on a smaller scale. but she never got caught for it. But so once I enter high school, now I am using. Now I am using, but I'm starting to sell a lot and it's okay. I'm getting it so cheap. I'm getting it so cheap that at first it was like I was just getting to do it for free. And then once I hit high, like, after like a year of high school, I've started to known everybody. So I'm the main supplier in that school.

And then, you know, obviously friends have friends and you grow your network that way. Where are you, I'm sorry, where are you getting this from? So since I'm in the suburbs, I'm going back down to Milwaukee where I used to live at first. Right. to go get it because I could get it for such a cheap price but eventually it went more into allegedly going online and ordering these

to a place so then I was getting it for such extremely cheap prices and it was the profit margins were so huge and so this goes along and at about 15, I move out of my house. I move out of my house and I go live with a friend. Why? What's the reason for that? A 15-year-olds do not read the house. You know,

that's the reason. Yeah. The reason I left was because my parents are deaf and yes, they are oblivious, but with that, having all that there, it's, it reeks. It reeks. Right. You know what I'm saying? And his parents were heavy, heavy opioid users and stuff like that. So his parents didn't care. So it was like, okay, perfect. I'll move in, I'll move in there and just do it, do it there. Not knowing later that, once I ended up moving in there I'm paying their mortgage their electricity got shut off I had to pay that I'm paying their car notes I'm feeding their habit right but it was it was okay because I had enough money to do it it was fine until you know after a couple months I move in there I had always seen his dad you know it started off with with crack i had always seen him you hitting the pipe always after a couple months i was like why is he always hitting that like it what is so good about that that he is always doing it like there's got

to be something to it so i ask him can i try and he he doesn't say no he says are you sure this is what you want to do and i said well you're doing it all the time it's got to be pretty great and he said i wouldn't recommend it but if you want to you can and i was like yeah i i do so i try it mind blown it's crazy so i end up um now i'm now i'm using and selling so now it's kind of especially feeding their habit and now so now since I have so much money to feed my own habit, it's like I really get deep into it. So after I do this for about a year, I'm stacking up money, I'm living there, I'm getting arguments with my parents through text, I'm not going to school,

I'm showing up, I think my reports that I showed up 56 days, that year to school. I'm not, I didn't get any truancy tickets. I'm, I'm just not going to school. But I kept, I kept good, I would only go on test grades. I didn't keep, I kept B's and C's though. Right. Every once in school, I only went on test days, took the test, and I'm gone.

Right. And I made, I made it work that way. So the story kind of really gets, screwed is my 16th birthday i turned 16 regular birthday i try this is where i try opiates for the first time now now that i'm now i tried that five days later i go to get my own stuff now the first time now the first time i had used it, I was under the supervision of my friend's parents. So now I'm doing it by myself for the second time. I have no idea what I'm even really doing.

Right. So it's like, so I pick up a certain amount way more than I should have for really a first time user and I do all of it. I do all of it. And I go to school that day. I lived five minutes from school. I do it immediately get in the car to go to school, five days after my birthday, go to school. And by the time I'm walking into the school after six minutes,

I can't even walk. I call my friend. He's carrying me to the bathroom. I'm vomiting on the floor of the high school. People are moving out of the way. He carries me, shoves me in a stall, and he kind of, he watches me. I tell him exactly what happened, because this was a friend that I was living with. So he had an understanding of it a little bit.

So he goes to the vending machine. buys me a gatorade. He gets me a gatorade and then clothes, puts me in the stall, locks the door, he goes back to class because he was getting truancy tickets. I don't know why I wasn't, but they were giving them to him, but they weren't giving them to me.

So he leaves me in there 20 minutes later. He comes back, checks on me, slides under the stall door to check on me. I'm done I'm out I'm pale I'm purple I'm blue

never even got to open the gatorade so he gets out he runs down to the office and he wasn't

a good kid so the principals hated him as well as me because they knew what I was doing as well

always going into school smelling but they didn't know it went to this now so he goes in the office he yells i need someone to come with me right now and he runs out obviously principals follow him they come running down they come into the bathroom they see me

they immediately we don't have a school resource officer there was none so they have to call 911 so they call 911 and now I, when this is happening, obviously, I'm, I'm dead. I'm dead. I think they said it was dead for six or seven minutes of that. So I'm, I'm dead in the bathroom. The police come, they immediate, he, he tells them not exactly what happened, but where he tells them a story where they can put together what they need to do to help me. But not the exact story, but obviously he tells them something where they know what they need to do to help me.

Right. So they do that. They cut open my favorite sweatshirt. Pissed about that because as I was waking up, I'm like, really, damn, they cut off my favorite sweatshirt. So mad. But as I'm waking up and coming to and seeing all the cops and ambulances coming through. and you know i'm just six i just turned 16 five days ago i as i'm coming to and waking up i'm like oh i am in so much trouble i like i already knew i'm like this is so bad this is over with

so they end up taking me to the hospital obviously they take me to the hospital to monitor me get it all out of my system and whatnot. A couple detectives came to talk to me. I told them, I don't want to talk to you. There's nothing I have to tell you. There's nothing you can do to help me because it's not like you can charge me with anything. I don't have anything.

So there's something for you to help me with. So I tell them to leave me alone. They get out of there. They talked a couple. My friends tell them to screw off. Same thing. nobody says he's got a drug problem nobody says it everybody says it nobody says it nobody tells them that but obviously they obviously know because of the narcan was used to bring me back

right so obviously they know something but they don't but i'm sure at that point they probably thought it was worse than what it was because it was really only my second time using which I mean, it's bad at that age. It's bad at that age, yeah. I mean, obviously, I already died. So it was pretty bad. I'm kind of a minimizer, as they like to say. I don't think.

So I'm in the hospital that they can't call my parents. So they're calling my mom's work. somebody has to go down go get her and tell them and because my parents have no idea what i'm doing they don't know why i moved out the house even they so they still have no idea that i'm even using so when they come they had like a oh this uh interpreter on a monitor for for my mom so she could understand so they could the nurse could explain what had happened right but my mom is such a trusting person like obviously she knew i what happened but she is such a trusting person that i told her you know it was one time thing it won't happen again like i'm scared for my life

like you see what happened like i won't do it again she's breaking down in tears like it's terrible so i'm stuck at the at the hospital for a couple days and they eventually come back no no i'm at the hospital for a couple days then they ship me over to um it's called moa it got tore down i've heard it's called Milwaukee mental health institute right so they stick me in there and why why the mental health why meant for mental health because they they they feel that i am so on they i think that they felt that number one that maybe i was intentionally trying to kill myself or that number two i am just so out of control i don't really know what's going on so but it's it's almost they i'm pretty sure

they have to do this they have to stick you in there and someone comes and sees me and I stayed there for a week and throughout the week my parents there's no phone in there it wouldn't have made a difference so they put me in Milwaukee Health Institute

now I do this for my own safety whether it's because they think I overdose on purpose or they think I'm just too out of control to handle myself because I'm not an adult yet. I just turned 16. So my parents come visit me. They're the only people that are allowed to visit me. There's no phone there. Wouldn't have mattered. I can't call them anyway. So they make you

stay there. There is no like release date. They make you stay there until the doctor tells you that you are deemed safe to go. Usually it's about a week. But if you're in there putting up a fight and doing dumb stuff they're going to keep you there however long they want what is that place like it's it's literally it's almost like a jail everyone has their own room but you're not locked in your it's almost like prison because you're not locked in your room you can go out of your room at any time except at bedtime you're supposed to stay in there but you can leave to get out to go to the nurse or something. They make you go to school

because I'm in the youth building at this time, right? Hey, we know you probably hit play to escape your business banking, not think about it. But what if we told you there was a way to skip over the pressures of banking? By matching with a TD Small Business Account Manager, you can get the proactive business banking advice and support your business needs.

Ready to press play? Get up to $2,700 when you open Select Small Business banking products. Yep, that's $2,700 to turn up your business. Visit TD.com slash small business match to learn more. Conditions apply. They're making me go to school during this and then after it's just TV room. There's just two TV rooms and they feed you three times a day and everyone's just waiting to see the doctor. The doctor won't even see you until you've been there for a week. And that's usually when Most people get released, but they want to, so they can watch you for that week. But if you're in there putting up a fight or whatever, or doing dumb stuff, they're going to keep you longer.

Okay. So are there kids in there that you think, is it mostly kind of drugs or is it like kids that have like really severe problems? I'm the only one in there for drugs. I'm the only one in there. This is kids. And there are people throwing tantrums in there, throwing stuff at the faculty, the staff, the nurses. There are people fighting each other. It's a bad place.

Like I said, it got tore down. They don't take you outside. To me, the staff was fine. I didn't have a problem with them. I didn't talk to them. They didn't talk to me until the day before I get released. this caseworker comes to me and she said we're going to put what's called a chapter 51. So I don't, a chapter 51 basically says that I am incapable of being safe for myself or for others.

but it was for myself they put a chapter 51 on me that that doesn't sound that doesn't sound like it's good for you yeah it wasn't it wasn't good that doesn't sound like an immediate release no it didn't sound like an immediate release they put a chapter 51 on me the first time though they did let me out after a week but i had to go see this woman and i get i have to go see this woman every week i have to check in drug test therapy i have to do it all and i'm and i'm doing it i'm working i'm i'm doing it i'm still using cheating the system you know doing what i can and then um they put me on probation at the same time for it they put me on juvenile probation and i had a chapter 51 it was a year of juvenile probation but a chapter 51 is only six months long

so they put so since i since that happened at school i have to go to a board meeting with all the superintendents to see if they want to let me back in their school or not so i'm waiting I'm at home now. It's been a week. I get out. You know, I talk to my friends. I go see them, you know. So the meeting comes.

We didn't really do anything. I just stayed at home. I didn't do anything for this week. I stayed at home, try to stay out of trouble. And then the meeting comes up. In my mind, I already know the principles. They hate me. So especially, so I already knew that it was, I thought it was going to be.

and like I was going to be expelled. That's what I thought was going to happen. But, you know, I tried to plead my case, you know, I really want to finish high school, which I did. That wasn't a lot. I want to finish high school. I don't. I understand what I did was wrong.

And I don't want, I don't want to, I don't want to get kicked out expelled from school. I want to get my diploma. I don't want a GED. So what they ended up deciding. on is they didn't expel me. They put me in something called an alternative school. And they told me, so my high school would send the credits over that I needed. And I would complete them at this alternative school.

And then my old high school would still give me their diploma. But I wasn't allowed back on school property. does damn still ban from the school property i'm not allowed on it they don't want me anywhere near it and that that's fine so i'm i'm still doing the same stuff because i don't i'm still you know feeding my habit going through through emotions feed my habit and still selling doing all that and i'm doing good with my my peal because i'm I'm cheating the test. I'm not, I'm not being honest until one day this happened.

This was a week before I was about to be off my chapter 51. I end up getting so high. Well, let me take a step back. For some reason, at this school, they didn't allow me to be. They had, it wasn't a classroom because they weren't. actually teaching stuff but there was like it was almost like an office with a bunch of computers that everyone was doing their school work in but for me i had named me me go into a closet and locked me in there with a computer and i don't know why i think they think that i was so like

you're dangerous so dangerous and like trying to like give drugs to so many people people and all this and I'm like okay whatever it ends up working out because I'm I'm just in there playing games the whole time they end up open you good yep bye you know whatever but one day I got too I took way too much I'm falling asleep they call my PO my PO comes he tries to drug test me I don't have I don't have the stuff that I need to on me so I'm like I can't pee I don't have to pee I don't have to He's like, well, I'm going to sit here until school's over with it. I'm like, you can go ahead. If I have to pee, I will, knowing I had to pee so bad.

But I didn't pee for him. He left. I'm sure he put, he said, well, I'm going to have to put this down as a failure. And I said, look, you've got to do what you got to do. I'm sorry that I don't have to pee. So I go home, you know, whatever. Now, this is four days later, three days before. my chapter 51 is about to end.

So I'm still using an couple days later after the same thing just happened. I used too much again. I end up ODing again. And now I wasn't on a bus. They made a special van, like a special van. Come to my house,

pick me up and deliver me to school. and that same one would pick me up and deliver me home. I wasn't by any other kids. They put me by myself. And same with being in the closet. I wasn't around any other kids. It's not like I couldn't go out and use the bathroom, like I could be, but they just didn't want me really around other people.

It's not like I wasn't like allowed to, but they try to keep as much distance without being rude to a juvenile as you can, I guess. Right. so I end up using too much I get into the van as soon as I'm throwing up walking out of my house to get into the van so I get in the van close the door

now it lights out that's when it was it was over for me my P.O. was at school already to tell me how good of a job I've been doing. So when I get to school, and I do have some of the stuff on me because I was planning, I'm giving it to a friend at that school, who I knew before. I knew him a little bit before I even went to that school, a friend of a friend.

But so I had that on me. So get to the school, the bus truck, the van driver obviously notices, I'm a I'm gone. Like, I'm not getting up. I'm not getting out of Chavann. Like, I'm, there's no response. I'm pale. He was a former police officer, so he kind of, he kind of, he knows.

So he, once he gets to the school, I'm sure they were already waiting there for me. My P.O. was there, but he wasn't there for that reason. He was there to tell me how good I've been doing. and my chapter 51 was just about to end so I was so mad so I I ruin it I ruin it I get caught with with some stuff on me and now I'm back in the hospital the regular hospital to make sure that it doesn't happen again after they bring me back to life I see my PO he's mad whatever I ain't care. I knew I screwed up the chapter 51. It was what it was. I was like so close to completing it's so mad because I don't know what they're going to do about this. So I go to

the regular hospital, same feel. They watch me for a couple days and then they send me right back to the Health Institute, the Milwaukee Mental Health Institute. And I'm like, okay, I've been through this once. It'll be a week. It'll be fine. so now at this point i obviously ruined my chapter 51 so i'm waiting for a week to see the doctor the doctor says yeah i'm fine i can leave but i have to wait for my case worker not my probation officer so you can't really get i don't know if you can get revoked i'm sure you can get revoked on juvenile probation but they're going to do the that wasn't the juvenile probation was kind of to like extra the chapter 51 was the was the main thing he was just kind of like a add on i guess

but he really didn't have too much power over me he really didn't do much to me it was the chapter 51s that fucked everything up so i get i get when they doc tells me i can leave i wait for a couple extra days for them to come back and talk to me about what's going to happen with my chapter 51. So they give me another chapter 51. And I'm like, oh my gosh. But they're like, this time you're not leaving. We're going to transport you to Winnebago Mental Health Institute.

And this is three hours away from home. Right. And I'm like, all right, whatever. I don't know what it's either. It's not like I have a choice to say, no, I told, I don't want to go. I don't, I don't have a, it's not like I have a say in it. So they, they ship me out, they ship me out there to Winnebago, I'm three hours away from home. It's kind of like the same thing, except this place has a phone, and you can order a little bit of canteen.

Now, this, this meant, this hospital is the, where, you know, If you're a juvenile and you are deemed incompetent, you know, in the courts, this is where they're going to send you. Like you have a mental illness. You're so you're mentally ill and you're incompetent. Yeah. And this is where they send people for, you know, competency evaluations. This is where they send the juveniles. And then they have an adult one too called Mendota, but I was still a juvenile.

aisle so this is where they sent all those kids and they had they had a small drug program but it was maybe five people in it and the rest of the people that were there were there for you know just being crazy so i get there is they drove me i get there like three in the morning it's terrible they held me they took me out of the other mental health hospital held me in juvie for two or three days till the van got ready and after they told me i was getting another chapter 51 and i get shipped out to winnebago the two days in juvie the juvie was empty there was one other person in there it was a 12 year old who had got caught breaking into a firearm store and stole 47 firearms and they gave him like a year but i mean he was like 10 10 or 12 he was all

and the whole the whole other the the complex is empty there's nobody else in this juby i'm like how can they afford to keep this open he was the only person in there before i came and he's the only person in there after i left i don't know they keep keeps this open so as i get sent to winnebago i get there like three in the morning immediately i'm trying to to figure out what's my release date they they said we don't know yeah whatever blah blah blah so i get i guess not booked in but they take my name down pictures of me and they put me in my my room give me a bed and stuff like that but it's like the jail mattresses right so i'm in there And I'm so mad that they sent me there that I, and I'm so mad that they sent me there that I, I'm refusing to do anything.

I'm in my room. I'm not coming out for anything. I'm telling them, fuck that. I'm, I'm going to sit in here until you guys let me out. And after about a month, because it's supposed to be a six-month program. but some people complete it in three to four months. But it's normally a six-month program, which is the perfect amount of the chapter 51. But I was like, no, I'm not doing no programming.

Eventually, after a month, they come up to me and tell me, if you don't, because you have to level up to, you know, get released. There's six levels, but you can get released after the first. fourth level you know and it takes you have to like petition to level up and stuff and act good and right why you think you deserve it and participate in group and all this stuff and I was just like not trying to really do that so I was like forget it I'm gonna lock myself in my room one month after I've been doing this not coming not not doing anything being my room, they come and tell me, if you don't participate, you're never going to get released because you're never going to get to the certain step. So if you don't get to the step,

you're not going to get released. And I'm like, well, you guys can't hold me here forever. And I'm like, well, if you're not showing an effort to it, they're just going to keep redeeming you unfit and you're just going to keep you're just going to keep you're just going to stay here you're you're not going anywhere right and i was like oh man i'm like that's not good and i was like i already wasted a month not trying to do anything right yeah i don't know how it is for juveniles but for adults they can keep you forever yeah no they uh they definitely kept there were people in there for you know a year already they were keeping people for a minute but most of them weren't in the drug program that's also a different thing so i was like okay i my parents are coming up to visit

me i'm explaining it to them and i'm like okay so now i just have to i just have to kiss ass and pretend like i care right so and in my mind i'm like this is really a better thing i didn't waste this month because it actually ends up helping me in the end because of how stubborn i was at the beginning any type of going to groups was a major improvement because at first i wasn't going. So I'm starting to go through the groups. The processes there, and I'm still going to school at this point too. I have school and group. My alternative school is sending the work over there. They're printing it off for me. I'm still going to school. I'm still having, you know, to go to these drug groups and nobody in there wanted to be sober.

the five people that were in the drug groups nobody wanted to actually be clean but irrelevant you all they they had already been there before so they were trying they were catching me up and explaining this is how you have to do it if you want to get out of here and i'm like okay i understood got it so now in this mental hospital there's people cutting themselves and They really don't, they have doctors there and for stuff like that and it's so crazy because I know they kind of do it to adults, but to juveniles, they'll just give you meds that, you're just, you're just, you're just, a body at that point. They will.

Sorry, who else is there? I mean, you said one thing, you said cutting themselves. So, they're kids there with schizophrenia or are there kids that, are they talking in themselves. I mean, not to that. Yeah, there's, there are kids talking in themselves. And this is a 18 and below pod. There's two wings, but like, I went there in the winter, but during the summer,

during, like, outdoor wreck time, I guess you could call it. We could go out with the other side. But other than that, we really didn't see them. But this was the 18 and under. But, yeah, there's people with schizophrenia. There's people that are cutting. themselves and then there's probably uh maybe a total of 50 people in both wings and only only five and there's also a girl's side too and only five boys and like five girls are in the drug program

everyone else there is there for you know they have schizophrenia bipolar they have whatever they have, they're, you know, getting into fights. Their little kids are screaming, pout and fighting and put up a fight. They're hitting the staff, the guards, all types of stuff. Now I'm in the program. I'm doing all right. It's been a month. I'm still level one, but I'm coming to, I'm accepting that if I don't do,

if I don't do this program, I am not going to get out of here. So I've come to that realization. And it was really weird because they have a juvenile and adult side, obviously, but I've seemed like the juveniles, even though I was 16 at the time, they were like 8 to 12, a majority of them was. And it just felt like so weird that at that age that they would just be taken away from their family like that and for so long periods of time because they're not in the drug program so I don't know like how I know that they have you know they hear voices and all that but I don't

understand how they justify you know they want to harm themselves they put them in there whatever but at that young of an age it just seems like kind of crazy there is I was probably I was the second oldest. There was one person who came later that was 17 and ended up turning 18 and they got moved to the adult unit. But I'm in the program. I'm doing my schooling. I'm doing, I'm doing my program. I'm going just, just pretending like I care, giving them the answers that I know they want to hear so I'm trying I'm trying to you know scheme my way out of this and it's it's working because at first I I you know I gave them a month of nothing so any participation is improvement so at that point at that point it became it became so like so so I guess nice to have

my presence in the group that eventually I got to the point where I could just play solitaire by myself the whole group because I was still in group and I would participate and they would let me still move up the levels and I at first I didn't have a a bunkey it's not really a bunkey it's two it's two separate beds in a room and um they have a um like these mp3 players that have pre-downloaded music or whatever you can use them they charge them it's not anything good it's not touchscreen it was literally whatever the first um i what are they ipads or uh oh ipads yeah yeah yeah a shuffle that's what they were called the shuffle yes so it was it was it was helpful though but i mean It didn't have anything good on there

So eventually along the time I get a bunk I get a bunkey And I noticed this guy Longbendy Twizzlers candy Keeps the fun going Keep the fun Going Twislers

Keep the fun going he's not in the drug program he's in there for something else but i always whenever i come back from school or i would come back from the drug program i would notice he was always sleeping and that's not how most of the other people were there were a lot of people in there cutting themselves still i don't know how how they were doing it but they were like there would be people with a grieges marsh just up and down like you could see like it was terrible like hundreds of cuts on them i'm not really sure how how they were doing it previous scars opening up whatever um i got a bunkey and i wanted to know why how he was able to sleep his time away that

i'd always get so mad at people because i couldn't do that i can't just sleep all all day. I would get so mad. No, I found out that he was taking this medication called, I don't know if it's pronounced Haldol or Haldol, but it'll play a part later in the story. He told me that's what kept his voices out of his head,

and he was able to sleep all day. So I just kept that, I just always remember that. I asked him for his medication a few times so I could try to, but he was too scared to do it so he never really gave me it so it i just always remembered it because it was such a weird name of of it and i noticed he was always sleeping so a couple like uh now i'm on my month two i'm probably i think i'm i'm level two and there was this one kid he was a really he was probably six two

and maybe 200 pounds he wasn't fat you know he wasn't skinny but he was uh he was definitely really insane and because it i went in there when it was winter months and eventually it was the end of winter months it was like it was the end of winter months so they're starting to open up the yard and it's it's still cold but it's you still go out there just to get some fresh air So it's like a small, it's just a, it's just, it's literally a, like a kids playground that you would see at school and it's just fenced in. But no barbed wire, just maybe a 10 foot tall fence. And he had always talked about jumping over the fence because on the other side of the fence is just a parking lot where the staff parks are if you get a visit, that that's where they park. So I always seemed like, I know I can get someone to just pull.

I thought he got me thinking that I could I could definitely climb a fence so fast if I had someone waiting there I could get out so fast too I like so it wouldn't be a problem but I never I I thought about it but I never put like actually real thought into it it was just scenarios that played through my head knowing that I could do it but he kept talking to me about it and eventually he came to the point where he did try to hop this fence and so while he's he he gets over the fence and he just takes off and starts running so they bring us all back in they locked us down eventually they bring him in on like on like a like a stretcher almost but he is i don't it's almost like what they put it's not the street yeah it said no it is a stretcher but it has like the cuffs

on them so you know he his hands are locked to the to the board and his legs are locked to the board he can't and they keep you know he's being disrespectful fighting with staff and they don't do anything like they don't try to really talk you out of it their plan is okay we're giving him that we're giving him we i don't know what the shot was but it was always just called the shot we're giving them the shot and it would they would leave you on the board give you the shot check up on you every 30 minutes and it's supposed to put you to sleep right or relax you but put you to sleep is what it did i never got the shot but just from what i seen and they had to give this man like four shots to get him to get him to finally go to

get some sleep now while i'm in there i'm after this happens i end up there was a big case that went on in in lisconsin it was called the slenderman stabbings i don't know if uh you heard about it so basically this girl and she was in my class and i later she told me what she was in there for i didn't believe it but after i got out and looked it i had heard heard about it, but I never knew. I got up and looked up and knew that it was true because I seen her picture, her name, and it all made sense. Yeah, the slender man.

Yeah. Slim man or it's like a fictitious anime character. Yeah. So her story is they're not really like that much of a backstory to it, but the story of what she did pretty much is her and one of her friends her and one of her friends

at the young age of like 10 are watching I think they're going on I want to say it's maybe there was a website but it was like a slenderman chat and like videos and like they started like really believing

that like her friend really ended up mainly like convincing her that we were supposed to invite this friend over, take her into the woods, and kill her as a sacrifice to Slenderman. And it's just so crazy. It's so bizarre at such a young age, like how it happened. So that is exactly what happened. She got stabbed 20 times, but she ended up surviving. She crawled out and eventually made it out of the woods, ended up surviving. And what's so crazy, and I get at such a young age, but she ended up getting like 25 years in the mental health institute.

She got out after like 10, maybe, not even. Right. And the other girl got sent to jail, and she got, she, I don't know why one went to the mental hospital, one went to jail. And I think if they had to put them in separate ways, it should have been switched, the other purse. and that was in jail that convinced the person to stab her should have been the one in the Mental Institute and the one that stabbed her should have been in jail, but it was the other way around.

But so she's not like she bragged about her anything. I just always asked, I just always was nosy, was wondering why people were in there. There's nothing to talk about time goes by. You know, you make conversation. So she told me very vague about her. it and I was like yeah whatever she's crazy but I mean it she is but it's really what happened

so now I now I um after I after this guy is probably I'm like two months in or maybe yeah like two and a half months and I'm just doing my program The one guy who was, I told you, 17 and going to turn 18 towards the end of it, he had a visit. And at this facility, you were allowed to wear your own clothes. They would provide you clothing, but you could have your parents bring you your own clothes, but obviously, you know, it's going through searches, you know, all your clothes are getting searched before they get in. So there's no contraband and stuff like that. But the visits, they don't search the visitors.

So this, they strip search you after you have a visit, but that's a, that's about, that's about it. But this one guy that was in the drug program with me, he had got his people to come visit. So he, after the visit, he had planned to get some stuff brought in. some some like adderals and morphine pills just silly little stuff

and then his parents also I don't know if it was his parents that actually visited him but whoever visited him brought him some clothes too and when they searched the clothes while they were in the visit

just to get it over with they found drugs in his clothing that his family had actually or whoever brought it had actually forgotten to take it out like you left drugs in my like his red flag especially when you know that like I'm trying to bring him in like you know they're going to search that so he gets pulled out of his visit and he gets strip searched as he's getting strip searched he told me you know he turned And he's doing the strip search, he squat and call, as he does that, he had two packages up there, apparently, and one of them fell out as they were doing the strip search. But there's not like, it's not, it's not like they can, he's, all they, all they basically do is going to restart your program.

They're just going to, you know, they're not, they're not going to charge you, unless it's a major amount of drugs or something, but a couple of pill. They're not, they're not going to charge you. they're not they're not going to put you to jail you know they're just going to restart your program because clearly you have a problem right so so that that ends up happening and but only one of the packages fell out so one of them got in okay so he ends up after his after the strips there he up getting his package out or whatever and he's he's dispersing it and he's dispersing it and he he's dispersing it um and i was the was the old one of the only ones who didn't take something he's dispersing it because i i when i when i'm when i'm locked

up or away or gone when I'm not in the middle of my addiction or when I come home and have freedom I'm not actively trying to use when I'm in jail I'm not actively trying to use even if I come across it I know it sounds crazy but like I wouldn't if I was on the streets I would have said yes but if I was in jail I'd say no even though I had the money to afford it right very very bizarre but so he gets a package in and he's dispersed as it it's not it's a couple of them it's not much people are high for a couple of days maybe and then they decide when after that happened a couple of days later they decide to drug test everybody to see people talk whatever i don't know what happened or they just decided to do it because of the

visit that happened, see if he maybe took drugs during the visit, swallowed them a couple to see what actually went on. So they drug test the whole unit. And everyone, everyone that was in the drug program, which isn't that many people, like I said, it was like five boys and five girls, not that much. So everyone takes a piss test. The girls did, only the guys did. But everybody that was in the drug program failed everyone else didn't fail i was the only person that didn't and that's what really got me to getting into my last step of giving out because i was the only one who didn't get high that i it was a six it's normally a four to six month program and i completed it in three months but really only two months because the first month i didn't

do anything. I rebelled. So that really like kind of cut a lot of time off, I guess. It really made them believe in me that I was actually changed. So that cut a lot of time off. And the girls were doing the same thing with visits. They were getting rollers brought in and stuff. And I don't think I ever got caught up with that. I'm pretty sure nobody did. They never got caught up with that. So, but it was, it was happening. So, whatever. So now I'm getting closer to, you know, three, three months.

I finally level up. I've been there about three months. There are six levels, but you can go home once you reach level four. You can, they might say no, but more. 95% of the time at level 4, they're going to let you go home. So it's around the three-month mark. I finally get to level 4. And they make you do so much stuff that they don't tell you beforehand to try to set up,

to make your stay just a little bit longer. Like, in order to leave, you have to have outpatient already set up. And it has to, you have to have, not just set up, but it needs to be within like 72 hours within your release date. You need to have an appointment already set up. And, you know, my P.O. came up there once and visited me. It wasn't a, I don't even know why he came up there. I think he just wanted to come up there.

It's not like we talked about any. I mean, we talked about, yeah, I was getting, I was getting out soon. that was about it and he was like you know you still got three months left of your chapter 51 and i like i said i had a p.o and a case worker for the chapter 51 they were separate but they they did work together to try to help me but so i i am almost going home it's it's like two i'm level for and we're going to chow one day and i bring my what i would do to pass most of my time was solid air and sudoku books right and i brought a sudoku book down to the lunch room and this lady was being so mean to me about it she considered a contraband

And a couple days before I was going to go home, and immediately extended my stay two weeks. I was literally like two days from the door. I was so heartbroken. I spent the rest of those two weeks in my room. I was so, I was actually crying. I was so upset that it was so bogus. I ended up arguing with them. it ends up being more like they want to see they want me to keep me in there for two more weeks

but since I'm getting out they need to have a conference call they need to have a conference call with my PO my caseworker on the streets for the chapter 51 and I guess my counselor in there and my teachers like everyone needed to be on this conference call so they set up the conference called my parents obviously since their death they came up there and i didn't know that this was going to play a major role in this but they they come up there for the phone call and i'm interpreting it for them and stuff and they want me to stay two weeks for it and but the counselors and all they were like he's doing good we think he's ready to go home it's just he you know he had this mistake and brought contraband down to to the lunch room or chow room and it was they were making

the half people were making a big deal about it and the other half weren't but the important people weren't making a big deal about it so they were like okay we're going to going to set your release date for one more week in advance. So, and well, my parents are like, well, we already have the outpatient appointment in two more days. And we're already here. We can't come get them later. And I kind of told my parents to say that because they don't know sign language. So they don't know that I'm telling my parents this. So, So I'm telling my parents this, and they bring up that argument, you know, we're already here. Like, he's already at the level he needs to be.

This is silly. He's ready to come home. Right. He did the program like you guys asked. He still has outpatient. He's got everything set up. So they end up taking it. They end up accepting it and being like, okay, you're, you're, you.

You can go. You can go. So I was so happy. I had to go get all my stuff ready. You know, I had a, it's not like I didn't have canteen, but I had, I didn't, I never got clothes brought up there. But I had a pair of shoes brought up there. So I wasn't always wearing slippers because all they would give you is those jail slippers. Yeah.

So it was like, I don't want to wear those for six months if I was going to be there that long. Right. I didn't want to learn. So they end up accepting it and they let me out. I, my PO, who was on, he was on the phone call meets me at my house as I'm pulling in. And I'm already on the way home since I live so far. I'm already planning to go get some stuff. already have, I already have been planning it all along, but now that I'm on the way home,

I'm already texting the right people, you know, I'm, I'm already making it a plan. My P.O. is at my health. And so I know that he's there now. Okay, I, he, he, he, I dropped for him, obviously clean. And so I know, okay, boom, as soon as he left, I'm up the door. I left, went to go, went to go get, uh, go get some stuff. Now, when I went, I got some stuff, came home to use it. And when I, when I, um, when I was doing it, it wasn't the same as it was before. So it like, it didn't give me the same feeling. it almost made me feel like

like I was dying like I was having a heart attack almost so now this is the same day I got released probably around two three plus a three hour ride home maybe I got released at noon and I got home at maybe three or four

is probably what happened and so I come back home I'm like I don't even want to I don't even want to do this. It literally feels like I'm dying. So even though I didn't get like that much stuff. I was like, I just want to get rid of it. So my friend says, yeah, I know someone to get rid of it too.

And I'm like, okay, cool. So he comes. I sneak out of my parents' house because, I mean, how are they're not going to hear me open the door. I just walk out. So I'm really sneaking out. It's just walking out the door. So I do that. And I don't tell my parents I'm leaving.

And this guy picks me up with his friend in a stolen vehicle and did not tell me. Right. I didn't find out until after five minutes, we left the house. And eventually we get pulled over. And I know I got this stuff on me. And like, is everything good? You know, you got your papers and all. he's like yeah yeah i'm good no he was not good so the sheriffs obviously you know they they pull us

over they don't even come to the door they get a couple more cars to pull up and then you know they all get out and you know get out step out the vehicle you know with their guns and stuff and i'm like oh man i just got out and like i was like no that like eight hours later and now i'm actually going to jail. I'm like, I literally just got out of this program. I'm like, this is ridiculous. And I obviously had that stuff in my back. I had it in my backpack, but it was near me. I got charged with this juvenile charge. But it didn't, it didn't reset my chapter 51. They, because what had happened I got

first when I after I exited the vehicle one thing is my phone fell out of my pocket I didn't know I wasn't supposed to try to pick that up when I went to go pick it up oh my gosh they all yelled at me thought I was going to pick up a gun or something

because I was getting pulled out the stolen vehicle right so it was like really insane but I had this stuff in a gum wrapper the stuff I get booked in they go through all my stuff they don't find it so I get put in the cell I'm in the adult jail but I'm only you know still 16 so they put me in a different uniform and they have to keep me in booking in a single cell by myself I'm never allowed out because I can't be around adults obviously so I can't be around

adults. So I'm stuck in there. They have like a phone, you know, I can bring to your door so you can like get it through the food port and make a call obviously. But I can't, I have to call a friend and be like, hey, you know, I want to text my mom that, you know, I'm in here and come visit me. And of course, you know, they do it. Of course, she's furious. But when she gets down there, my P.O. tried to tell her no you can't visit him and she may starts making a whole scene she's like how how do you expect me to keep in contact with my child i can't call him on the phone he can't call me you have no right to to not let me see my child and all this so he has to end up getting his supervisor down there and his supervisor goes on my mom's side uh supervisor uh supervisor

or goes on my mom's side and lets my mom see me. So they bring me out to this small. Because they don't really have visitation and booking. You know what I mean? There's no visitation and booking. But there's a small room that has, it's like an ancient TV, not like the kiosk that they have. It was like a bubble TV that had a camera on it.

I was able to see my parents and I got to visit. and and um my my p.O wanted to send me to a halfway house at that time my parents talk to me about it and I'm like no don't don't listen to that I don't know halfway house because you're they're my legal guardians if they don't say yes they can't real they have to make They have to file the right procedures to, I guess, take away guardianship. So I actually, even though I kind of, even though I'm on juvenile probation, I didn't really, I'm there's, the juvenile PO is still not my guardian. He can't just do whatever he wants.

Right. As, as like an adult PO kind of can. So this, he wants to send me to an halfway house. I convince my parents, it's not a good idea. they it's a terrible idea and they they believe it they accept it they they believe it they're like okay well we'll talk to him we'll see what we can do um and so this was the first day then this was in the first couple of days i only stayed in there for a week but unlike the fifth day after i had been in myself they came to me and said

did when you got arrested did you have this on you and i said oh no i didn't i didn't have that on me they would have found it when they searched everything when they booked it in and they were like yeah no no i i get that book we we we went through your stuff and now this is in there and i'm like well that's not that's strange yeah that's very weird that's very weird that's You think maybe the police planted it? Yeah, that's right. That's what I'm telling them. That's so crazy because they already searched my stuff.

So insane. How did that get in there? So they still end up charging me with it, but they didn't end up charging me with bringing contraband into an institution. They discharged me with possession. and it didn't it didn't uh it since it wasn't they really didn't have a real case because it's been so long since i had like they found it five days later and not i mean they had already searched my stuff like they it would have been very difficult to for them to to to to i guess prove that now

because they had already looked through my stuff and it had already been right i don't know what made them go through it again but so do they but you said they charge you with it they do charge me with it yeah do they do they charge me they end up no so they end up i keep fighting the cases so they keep giving me dpa's so after what so they don't while this is going on i don't get revoked they want to send me to a halfway house a halfway house is a really long time so I told them that I would go to a rehab, an inpatient rehab, because it's only 30 days I get out, I'm done, and it'll get them off my back.

And since I already just did like a drug program, you know, they'll take what they can get, you know, maybe it's just a minor slip up even the exact same day I got out. But they, whatever. So they, uh, I had got to the seventh day after I was there for a week. They had made the plan that they were going to send me to a rehab in Chicago, Illinois, two hours from my house. And I had, I had been okay with it.

I've accepted it. So the bus, there's no bus that takes me. The, the sheriffs personally have to. drive me to the rehab, even though I don't know how they're allowed to do it because the sheriffs that's out of their jurisdiction. They weren't federal. And I know that because one of the sheriffs that drove me was one of my classmates' dads. So he knew who I was. So it wasn't really a secret. So they transport you? Yeah, they transport me all the way. I transport me out of Wisconsin to Illinois down to, I don't think it's actually in Chicago, but it's near Chicago anyway.

So I do this, now I'm doing this 30-day drug inpatient rehab. I live there. I sleep there, but since it's a private rehab, like it's amenities, you know, it goes through your insurance. It's nice. It's nice. You know, like, it's actually a nice place to be. The only thing that sucked is there's literally groups all day long. Like, you don't have free time. That's the only thing that sucked.

But so while I'm in there, my parents come up and visit me. And I had talked to this one guy in there and I was like, what? Why are you in here? I'm talking to everybody find out their store. stories they're figuring out what people are in there for and just hearing people's stories you know see who I'm around and this one guy told me he was like oh yeah um I I use DXM so I'm like well what is that and basically cold medicine like if you um if you see anything that has like If you buy mucinx or whatever, and it says DM, it's because it has DXM in it, it's a, it's a hallucinogenic.

Right. And I had never, never done this. But I convinced my parents while they're visiting me, I convinced one of them to leave and go to the store, allegedly, and buy this and bring it back and give it to me because the nurse wouldn't give me the rest. right meds and i'm really sick i have a really bad cold and i need a whole box of this right so they leave one of my parents leaves gets it and brings it back along with a vape they brought me in a vape and stuff a charger they hooked me out and they let you have this the drug the drug people let you no they had no they had no idea they had no i mean don't they see your parents bring it in and don't they search you no they do they go through they don't search you

really they'll go through your stuff every once in a while but they don't search your visitor so my dad had left saying oh i'm just going to the store real quick and came back and they're not going to search him and they they visit in your unit all the parents come they have like couches in there and stuff and my parents you know on the slide just slipped me the box and a vape i was put in my pocket and it is what it is. And so I end up taking like 10 of these things because that's what I was told to do by this guy. And now we end up having,

they had like basketball. They had like, their rec time was like basketball. So after visits were over, I was starting to feel this now. I'm starting to feel it. and I'm kind of I'm not freaking out but it's it's very uncomfortable because I know that nobody else knows besides the two people I told or whatever right the feeling of it was not a good feeling I couldn't imagine why someone would be addicted to this

It is, there is no good feeling at all. There is none of that. And, um, this guy, I mean, he, he, he was so out there. Like, he told me one time he had overdosed on this stuff because he took like 50 pills. And he told me that, uh, he had saw aliens at the hospital and they were purple and all types of stuff. I'm like, oh my gosh. I was like, yeah, I'm not going to take that much, but I'll dabble with it. See what it does.

Not a good feeling. It's uncomfortable. You do, you feel queasy like you're going to throw up. And they put something in the medicine so people do feel that way so they don't abuse it. Right. So I'm feeling queasy, but I don't throw up. I am just walking laps around. the gym all right so i'm walking laps around the gym and uh i'm walking around their basketball game

and that's not normal for me normally i would participate but they can't really they don't know what's normal and what's not normal i mean i'm just doing something else for a day because somebody was walking with me a one person i was telling man i don't feel good my whole body is itching i'm thinking I'm allergic to it like I can't my whole body's itching it's terrible and it's it lasts for so long it was just the worst thing I had ever experienced it was so it was so bad it's the worst thing I had ever experienced and he had gotten me to believe that that's normal it's a first time thing when you do it again a second time and a third time you won't have those initial feelings but i never ended up doing it again at that place i gave because a box of it has a lot so

i split the load up between me and him i gave him most of it though but um i end up i do this program and it's not really i mean it's a decent program it's just more like a i just feel like they don't really care because regardless after 30 days you're out the door you don't have to make any progress like you don't really have to do anything i was already doing it just to because they can let you about like three days early and i was like if i can get three days on my sentence i'll participate whatever because it was like otherwise if i wasn't participating i had to be in my room all day And they didn't have the iPod shuffle. They didn't have the iPod shuffle.

So I could, I had nothing to do in my room all day. So it was like, whatever. You get through the program, right? I mean, you get through that program and they let you out. Yeah, I get through the program, they let me out. So now I'm getting close. I'm getting close. I'm still going through the courts.

system for those charges and stuff and those things keep getting what's called a DPA you know if you know what that is it's a deferred prosecution agreement

okay so it's kind of it's like hey if you do this like you know if you go to this treatment then you know we agree to drop the charges or if you do you know whatever you

you know stay clean for this long, we'll drop the charges, you know, whatever they had wanted me to do, if they wanted me to go to drug court or whatever, whatever. But that's not what they had me do. So I finished the program. I'm still going through the court system. I'm still on my chapter 51. and now I'm doing all right.

I'm doing fine. Now at this point, I had found such a way to try to, I just found ways to try to, I just found ways to try to cheat the system because I found out at this time. And if I was going, my P.O. really wasn't dropping me. And I was almost finished with probation at this time because it's almost been a year. And I only had a year on there. So I'm going to my, I'm going to my, I had to go to therapy after I got out. I'm going to see her. I almost want to say it was, it started off like three times a week.

and I progressively got down once a month but it took forever because I was so stubborn and trying to tell them I don't have a problem you guys are a problem I've yes I see

what it looks like but I've only used it a few times and I've just been unlucky and I don't have a problem right so and I'm starting to believe myself a little bit maybe

I'm starting, because I have the system full, so now I can't have myself full. But they watch, and I'm still keeping my, this goes on for a long time, until I'm about 17, it goes on for a little bit, I'm doing good, I'm going through the court, and then at 17, I was still, while I was going through these programs, I had always had someone take care of my operation, right? So there was still money coming in. I had someone take care of it. When I came home, I would take back over and fix it all of even though they were never really real problems with my operation.

But I ended up taking it back over. And so now, right as I am turning, I do I I I'm still going through the court system and what had happened was I'm doing I'm doing good I have been out for like a year of anything so this is a year span that I've just been doing good and haven't caught any new charges haven't been failing my drug test been going to therapy been doing everything they've asked of me I've been doing everything that has been asked of me I've been doing everything that has been asked. of me and I'm taking care of the operation and so COVID ends up hitting COVID no COVID hasn't hit yet so I'm still doing my thing and a year goes by and as soon as I turn 18 within a couple months I get my door I get my my my house rated why like when someone

like so somebody sets you up yeah okay so what had happened when I when I read the discovery is I know what actually happened but this guy had bought a THC

cartridge not from me not from me he had gotten something else from me. Okay. Left my house and they kind of got on to me because neighbors, I was getting lazy and, you know, serving out of my house as you should never do.

Right. So I'm making it easy for them. I'm not even leaving. They can really surveil me. And my neighbors are calling because I lived in a cul-de-sac. so it's always full of cars like a like a drive-through and my neighbors are pissed you know they don't

understandable it's whatever so understandable so they pull one this guy over as he gets a couple blocks away from my house so I don't see it or whatever and since he didn't want to pay the ticket for a THC cartridge

he was like oh i i i will definitely tell you where i got it from which is not from me but he said it was from me so he cooperates with them where it does some um some buys on me you know and um does some buys on me and you know they got the evidence they needed you know and it's uh it's only It's now 24. So this was, like, five years ago. Like, technology is good. Right. There are cameras everywhere.

Right. And even, like, my backyard, the way my house was set up is I had, like, it was the shape of a football field of a one square acre. And then it had, like, it was a rectangle, like, perfect. And I had tree lines, side street, and then a shopping mall. It was like Walgreens, Planet Fitness, like all this stuff. So there was cameras that I could see my house, even if I was like, there was a lot, like, even like other people who didn't have, like, ring cameras weren't that big at that time. My house was always being, could have always been surveilled. And I didn't really think about it.

I was like, oh, I have the tree line. I'm like, they don't have cameras in the back. No one, whatever. They have to subpoena. those and really pull up and I don't know how they got some of some of these these pictures because they are like I mean they are like I can show you some of the pictures I have them but it's like there's pictures of like they're literally like standing right next to me I'm like how did you get that angle I would have you were not right there right and when I end up getting my health

rated. Obviously, they try to knock on the door, serve the search warrant. I'm in my basement sleeping. And obviously, my parents are not hearing that. So I don't know if they even knocked or if they just assumed that no one was going to open the door. The parents are deaf. You don't, you kind of have to open it. No one is going to hear you knocking or ringing the doorbell. So I hear them break in my front door. It's like four in the morning. They go through the first level. Obviously, they wake up my parents with, you know, guns in their faces. My parents are, you know, it was only my mom. My mom was the only one there. My dad was at work at this time. But he had rushed home as soon as my mom texted him about it.

Now, I had heard them break in, but I sleep with the teeth. TV on. So I thought it was my TV playing a police show. And I had time to get rid of stuff, but I didn't, I didn't realize until I opened my basement door and told me to come up there. And I'm like, oh, yeah, I've nowhere to put all this stuff. so I go up there and I get everything my house is completely torn to shreds it's it's over with like everything is torn to shreds they rip the couches up like they literally do everything they they they found there was I was I never really hit anything who's literally in a closet but they tore apart the whole house so I end up getting arrested and they take me in and they book me and that's like the start of my adult charges and I'm still fighting the juvenile charges and that's how it like all came up so many it came up like this so these are some of the pictures and I don't know how they got this this angle of literally being like right next to me

stuff like that but they they I don't know it's technology is so crazy whatever when they ended up

arresting me they told me for all you know we could have had drones or not telling you know how we did it but so I am

you had what happened you got brought downtown fingerprinted path west the whole thing got your picture taken

I got it all and I get I obviously get sat down some detectives. Now, they're, there, I get charged, first off, I get charged with manufacturing THC. I get charged with possession with intent to deliver LSD. I get charged with possession of maintaining a drug home, or I mean, maintaining a drug

trafficking place, maintaining a drug vehicle. I caught a couple of bail jumpings because my juvenile cases were still going on, but I wasn't really out on bond for those. But there was nothing, now that I'm 18, I can actually get bond. And I wasn't on my chapter 51 and I wasn't on probation anywhere. So there was only that I was saying I couldn't get bond. But I get charged with possession of narcotics as well and possession of crack cocaine. And I get charged, I get all these charges.

And, you know, and I get, they sent me down. They weren't all that. They were more very interested in the tabs, the LSD tabs. That was their main focus because I don't know if it's, it is a unique thing, but they had. um they had a a federal guy in there with them because he had questions about that because it's not something that is normally around like that i guess okay he wanted to know about it and i wasn't really willing to tell them anything i already at this point i already know i'm booked I'm done. It is what it is. I'm booked. I'm smoked. I see all the pictures. They show me. They show, they literally have like a couple of sheets of paper of all my clientele with all their picture. It was insane. It was like a yearbook with a couple of like small little pictures of all of them. And it was like so weird. It was like, I know they didn't all look like mugshots. I was like, how do you have so many all these pictures? Did you get them from a yearbook or something?

Right. It's very weird. It's very weird. And so they wanted to know, they wanted to know about it. And I was like, as at first, I tried the fake information. I try. I don't know the guy's name. No, I get, I gave him a name, but that's not a real name.

Right. I give him fake information. enough for them to to be content and in their minds put a couple ends together I guess but it's not really the truth at that time

it wasn't the truth it was all it was fabricated these names and so when I go to my bond hearing they bring the up that I was willing to cooperate and so I that made

you know with all those charges they were willing to give me a signature bond to get me out that I told them they weren't interested in the marijuana and how much they wanted other stuff and I'm good to that I know a couple names you know give fake names or whatever it's like you guys have my phone

and I'm not really good you guys seize my phone i don't know the phone numbers off hand all this stuff but enough for them to play ball with me right enough for them so they'll be out on a signature bond it was like a 500 dollar signature bond like literally the lowest bail for all those charges that's insane like my bail should have been through the roof another thing i should mention in wisconsin you will always get bail you could there is no unless you have a federal case they can hold you without bail but in the state of Wisconsin if you have a PO hold you'll still get a bail but you can't go anywhere but even if you

have 20 counts of murder they will give you a bail it might be 10 20 million but they will always give you a bail there is no no bail there's always a bail so that's definitely not the way it is in every state yeah i know i know it's really it's really weird it's really weird it's really weird they will always give you a bail no matter what but i mean it's to an extent eventually like this this guy who did you ever hear i don't know if you heard about it was a big news thing the walkishaw parade attack darrell brooks uh he drove through a parade and killed a bunch of people there's on the deal. Darrell Brooks.

Yeah. Darrell Brooks. So, you know, he had a bond in Wisconsin, $5 million. You know, they're going to give him a bond, but it's something obviously no one's going to pay. Right. But you will always get a bond. So, but it's, they're just going to make it so substantially absurd that no one's going to pay it. Right.

So I get out and I'm, I'm having meetings with. I have a public defender at this time. Right. I eventually do get a paid attorney, but at this time I have a public defender. And I'm not too concerned about all this stuff. I'm not too concerned about all of it. It is what it.

I'm still young. I'm like, it is what it is. I'm meeting with the detectives kind of misleading. them and for a little bit trying to stall them off as long as I could

until like I had to actually give real information having these meetings with them through text stalling appointments with them like I'll do it next weekend the appointment I'm like so what do you guys want just really making the process long as long as long as I could

could. And this was a bad idea because another big thing that helped was COVID had hit at this time. So they don't want people in jail. They're getting like all. They don't. Yeah. They don't want people in jail. And it's like they don't really.

It's almost like they for a while they stopped contacting me because they didn't, like they weren't even work. through COVID kind of almost like they were but I wasn't their main concern and I was like willing at that time I'm sure they had other things to take care of you know so COVID it hit so I it just gave me time out of nowhere and it gave me time and so COVID had hit I'm out on pretrial release and I have to go in I have to call every single day see if I have to do a drug test it's random i call every single day and it'll tell me if i have to come in or not right so i'm doing i'm doing straight for a little bit but covid hit while i was trying to stall off the detect just trying to figure out what i'm going to do and so COVID had hit and they shut down the place for like

they shut down the pretrial place for a little bit but they lied to people i would call and ask people Are you guys still open? And somebody did answer the phone, and they would say, yeah, we're still open. But whenever I had called, it was called the drug testing hotline. I had never gone more than, I would say the far this would be a week without a drug test. At this point, it had been a month. So I knew that they were shut down. There's no way.

It's been a month since I've had to come in for a drug test. and I'm calling every day. Okay. But it's also COVID. Right. It's COVID. So I'm thinking maybe they're going only taking, they're only drug testing two people a day,

one person per hour. They're going through their list randomly. I don't know what their procedure was, but it gets shut down for a little bit, not that long. But it gets shut down for a little bit. And I think, oh this is perfect they're shut down i could start using again and i don't even have to report

and get away with it so i start using again for a little bit and before before you know it they're back open but it's still the middle of covid my cases are you know their status hearing six months apart like they're so far apart covid made my case like three four four years long i didn't get sentenced like it was like three four years I was fighting my case COVID made my case so so long right so um the drug testing place had opened now I knew that I was going to fail this drug test so I go in there and I figure it's better to fail it and show up than to not show up at all at first this is what i thought which is true very very true and you know they they bring i fail it and um they they send a a letter to the judge about it and it gets brought up by my next

hearing right since i did that i am violating the conditions of my bond because i am not staying sober and though i don't know how they broken up my charges so weird i'm i know they they put you know charges they opened up so many cases on me it was so weird like when my house got rated i probably got three different cases for possession of crack cocaine even though it all happened at once but they they got like they didn't do like like duplicate charges on the same case. It was really weird how they did these charges. They kept opening up new cases.

It was really weird. And before you know, I have 10 cases. I bail jump one time. I bail jump 10 times because I'm out on bond on all these cases. Right. So I break the bond for all of them. So now I get 10 bail jumpings instead they rack them up like that. okay what I'm saying yeah so they do that and now you know my bond is is not that high it's

$2,500 because of and it's all because of COVID and because I was willing to cooperate so um they gave me a $2,500 bond I pay it I get it out. Now, one, I do this one more time where I don't drop dirty, I just go on, go on the run. And I didn't really go on the run. I just didn't go to court. I didn't go anywhere. And it wasn't actively, I just didn't want to be sick in jail. But I just don't go, I don't go to court.

Boom, they hit me with another. Now it's, now it's 21 because I caught another case for the bail jumping, so I don't have another open case. So they're racking up these bail jumpings on me so quickly. And I'm just looking at them. And they can give you three years apiece for these. And I'm like, I can get like 160 all bail jumpings alone. I'm like, this is insane. There's no way.

But I know they're not going to do that to me. I know they're not going to do it to me. But I'm like, that's insane that they could just because of the way they stack these charges. But now I'm finding ways to cheat the system. them every time I have court, I'll check into a rehab. Now, I have a viable reason to miss court. I'm missing drug test because I'm in rehab, though, I'm in treatment. It's okay.

You know where I am at this moment. It is okay. But I'm checking out the next day and you don't know that. Right. Because I don't sign an agreement. I sign a, I have my lawyer tell them that I'm there, but I don't even tell my own. my own public defender that I'm leaving, and they don't tell her either. So they really think I'm in treatment or any of this time.

I'm kind of screwing with them, kind of. I'm cheating the system. I'm trying to find all the loopholes I can to have freedom and not do treatment and not go to jail. So they're not giving me the hell jumpings for those, but they're not finding out what I'm doing, but every, I would still get caught a month later and they would just bring me in an arrest warrants. And then I just keep raising my bail, 5,000. And then I have another court date, 10,000. You know, I'd have, and I'd skip, or I'd have another court hearing. I'd skip it, get caught later. There is a 10,000, 20,000, 25,000. And Wisconsin, we don't, there isn't a 25, or there's no 10% rule.

There's no, bail bondsmen are illegal here. You pay, 100% of your bail or you're not going anywhere. Oh, wow, I don't know that. That's not. If your bond is 10,000, they want 10,000. There's no 1,000 here. They want 10,000. The bail bondsmen are illegal here.

It's very weird. But I guess it's, I guess they try to factor that in that you're not going through a bail bondsman so they make your bail more reasonable, I guess, since there is no bail bond. I don't know. It's weird how it worked. But if they would have gave me, eventually my bailed out to $25,000. And I bailed out all these multiple times going in and out of county sitting for a month and letting my going in and out and having my parents help bond me out. My parents, towards the end, they were putting up their house, taking it like they were taking loans out to get me out.

Like they were really trying to help me. And towards the end, now COVID's kind of over. And now I have to, I give, I give them the information that they need. I cooperate. I give them the information they need. So I got them off my back. I give them the information. It's not, it's not that interesting.

I do a couple of deals. They, the technology is so insane. I mean, they had a Starbucks cup with a camera on it. Right. It was insane. Some of the stuff they were giving me. There is no wire anymore. they give me another

cell phone that's on record Bluetooth that's all crazy stuff so I I don't end up

cooperating I give them what they need and so now the judge is giving me some sort

of leniency in if I if he had given me a $25,000 bail

at one point in time. I would have never been able to pay it, but since he gradually raised my bail, I was able to, you know, put 5,000 here, 2,000 there, 5,000, 3,000 here, another 10,000 there. I was able to spin it, and I'm doing these like months, like a month at a time every time I don't go to court and I haven't, my court since COVID is over, I'm missing court once a month. I'm literally getting out and jump and trying to not go to court. And I have court in two weeks and I'm getting arrested in three weeks. Like I'm getting in and out of jail every two weeks.

And I'm just buying out. I'm sitting there for a month. I'm really doing stupid stuff. And surprisingly, the judge did tell me, he said, if this was your money, I would take it. But since it's your parents' money, I'm not going to take the bond money. But there were many times where he had, he wanted to take the bond money. Right. Because I was, I wasn't, I wasn't listened.

I was doing whatever I wanted. I kind of had this cocky arrogance. I'll bail out. I'll be fine. Eventually I will come up with the money. Eventually I will bail out. They can't hold me. Eventually somebody will bond me out.

I always knew that. I didn't kill any one of my bails never going to be a million dollars. But even if so, at this point in time, and this is still kind of true. My parents probably would have sold their house for. like, you know, I've done everything, took out loans as much as I could to try to post it, even like up in the numbers. They were really supporting me. Do your parents understand the concept of tough love? Now they do. Okay. At this time, no. Because they, they weren't helping you. They were not. No. Right. You should have sat in jail. Right. You would then you would have

gotten clean. Then you might have started saying, hey, this is serious. Yeah. Yeah. But. they didn't understand that I always had money on my books they always came and visited me you know two three times a week they went their tough love was you know sitting in jail a week that's tough love or I mean a month and then the postman avail is not a big deal oh I we'll wait a little bit make sure you're good and give me out and I kind of feel like like because they're not they don't really need me but i do bring it because i'm always their interpreter i bring kind of value to them almost so i feel like that's a big thing that that played a part in them getting me out and what's really crazy is one time i for one time

during this a visit since my parents are deaf i don't it's the monitor phone it's not a glass screen it's a it's a monitor i don't i don't even pick up the phone because they're not talking we're just going to sign on the screen i'm going to see them like this how we are and they come and scoop me up in jail and throw me in the hole for um throwing up gang signs on a visit and i'm like this is absurd i'm like they take my visits i i can't call home like this is insane if i want to wanted to call home, I would have to, like, call someone else, and then they would have to call an interpreter, and then the interpreter would call my mom, and it would be like a five-way call.

And then you could get in trouble for having a two-way call or three-way call. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're not supposed to, but it happens. So sentencing is coming up, right? I've given them what they wanted. sentencing is coming up and my judge used to be the district attorney he's also been the attorney general he um i didn't think he was going to be because as a he was a d a for a long time and he was a very very tough d a he would smoke your boots right and i thought as a judge he would So towards the end, when I'm coming to sentencing, I hire a paid lawyer.

I hire a paid lawyer because I felt like my public defender wasn't. I feel like it was too much for her. She wasn't, I feel like she didn't have enough time. She didn't really care about my case. I was kind of a lost cause at this point. So I hire an attorney and sentencing is starting to come around. And, you know, I have all these open cases. And obviously, I'm taking what's called a global plea, right?

You know what that is? No. So I've heard of global pleas been described different in other places, but a global plea is we're going to wrap all 10 of your cases together. together and we're going to drop a bunch of stuff but you got to plead guilty you have to plead guilty and we'll sentence you all at once we'll get it you don't have to go fight all these different cases right it gets it all done at once and they drop obviously a lot of the bail jumpings but they do that to play because they they really use the bail jumpings as a bargaining token We'll drop the bail jumpings if you plead out to your original charges.

And it's like, I guess that's fair. But I mean, like I said, I cooperated and stuff and I helped them out. And I think that played a huge part. I had done, I'm going in and out of county. I had done, I don't know, maybe a year. Not, I mean, not a year. Maybe like six months in and out just drug, checking in and out of rehab and going in and out of jail

and just doing months here, getting out for a week, doing another month here, which is really stupid stuff. And so now it's time for... Stop. Do you know how fast you were going? I'm going to have to write you a ticket to my new movie, The Naked Gun. Liam Nissan.

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After all, you're in your small space era. It's time to own it. Shop now at IKEA.ca. For sentencing, and I take a global plea. So this plea is just most insane deal you'll probably ever heard for everything. He gave me a, um, um, what was it? It was like a month and a half in work release. And then I had, um, I had two years' paper with a withheld sentence.

And a withheld sentence is if I mess up on probation, I have to go in front of the judge and he will resentence me to what, you know, he probably should have in the first place. Right. It's a withheld sentence he can, if I mess up and I get revoked, I don't go do revocation time. I go see the judge and he resentences me. And so I take that deal and so I get, I get, I do my, my, the little time I had, which was like a month and a half. I do it.

I get out. a month and a half later I had I've only been in there for a month and a half at work release I had stacked up a little bit of money because it wasn't it was Wisconsin

it's called Huber but it's like actual I am allowed to leave the jail use my own vehicle and go to work at Denny's go work at wherever if I am employed anywhere

I can leave for up to 12 hours a day. Okay. So it's kind of like work release. Right, but I can work anywhere. Right. There is no, it doesn't have to be affiliated with the jail. Like, I can work. As long as I'm employed, I can leave. And they charge me. I think it's $24 a day or 26, I forget. But I did that for a month and a half. I had got a good, a decent job right off the back because, you know, there's always people and there's jobs that are close and they they work with a lot of humor people they're used to it since they're close to the facility so i got a job and saved up a little bit of money so i got out and i think and i i stopped for a little bit and then one i

stopped for a month and i a month made i it was it was too much i had stopped for i been out for two months and i had went to go use again i was like yeah whatever i'll do it so i this is the crazy craziest thing i go to use i go meet my guy i get my stuff i'm on the way home My phone is at 6%. Now, I'm high. I want to listen to music. So I got to stop at the mall to charge my phone so I can have music on the rest of my ride home because it's at 5%. I didn't have a car charger at the time.

So I knew that malls have like little charging stands. I don't have to pay anything. They have a little charging stands there. So I go there. and the last thing I remember is getting out of my car but what supposedly happened and I'll tell this really quick before I was hungry but I didn't eat because I was like I'm going to get high I don't need to eat it'll be fine but I wasn't I wasn't like starving or anything I could have got food but I was so rushed on getting high that I was like I'll eat later but as soon

as I get out the car I don't remember anything but supposedly I walk in the mall go to the food court do not charge my phone jump over their counters and try to steal their food and their money and then I proceed to go in other stores and just rip off tags of stuff not even trying to steal it not putting it on just ripping off tags what were you on Am I allowed to say that? I mean, I was on, I was, no, I was, yeah, go ahead. I was a mixture of Xanax and fentanyl. Okay.

So, wow. That is what I was. Yeah, it was. So I, I didn't remember. I don't. And had you ever done that before and had that problem? I had never had that problem. I, I wasn't, I wasn't doing Xen.

I think the Zans, I found out later when I dropped dirty that they were mixed in there. I didn't know that at first. I had never had this problem before. I had never thought about jumping over counters, robbing place. I never thought about that. I never thought about that. Any of that stupid stuff, but apparently I did it. And now I'm close to getting revoked because I don't get.

charged with robbery. I get charged with the- How are you close to being? I mean, to me, that would be a clear violation. Oh, it's a violation, Mom, close to being revoked. It's a violation. Right. Since I didn't get charged with, like, a robbery,

because I didn't leave, I got arrested by mall security and the police come and get me. Now, in Wisconsin, only in Milwaukee, When you are on probation or parole and you get arrested, usually they send you straight to prison. They send you. They have a prison in Milwaukee. You don't go to county jail no more. If you are on probation or we don't have parole anymore, it's called extended supervision.

So you do 100% of your time here. So. Okay. So I get, I'm on probation. so I get sent to the and since I live in Milwaukee I I get sent to this Milwaukee prison for a for a while my P.O. comes and sees me and she's like what the hell are you thinking I've never I never I never even met this lady yet I never even see her in the 60 days I I because I at first they gave me a P.O. in a different county seeing them and I switched P.

POs back to Milwaukee and I had never seen this PO yet and she when she her first time meeting me is obviously in in the prison she comes and sees me it's called Milwaukee Secured Detention Facility it's classified as a medium but it's you're in your cell like 22 hours a day you get like an hour on the morning an hour out at night that's it's really stupid all right so it's terrible and they do a they because COVID was going around so I'm doing a quarantine at this point I'm quarantine so I have to sit 10 days not coming out of my room right so I do the quarantine and they don't revoke me they give me a halfway house they give me a halfway house and they send me all the way out to Stevens Point which is just like

by Winnebago it's three hours from my home and I'm like why you send me so far we have we have a couple we have a decent amount of halfway houses in Milwaukee but she sent me there and most people who are in there that we're in there for you know

drugs and going to halfway houses we're going to the close halfway houses I was the only one who was getting shipped so far and I was like why I don't understand why is it. Maybe they're thinking the area has an, there's a problem. There's too many people there that you know that are willing to contribute to your issues. And that is what they end up telling me.

Right. That is why that happens. That's exactly. Probably pretty accurate. So go ahead. So they ship me to this. Now, I don't, I mean, I'm, no. this halfway house is in the end it was really nice because this was the most relaxed halfway

house you could imagine not halfway houses in Milwaukee they were doing quarantines but since it's COVID you're not leaving to go to work you know you're staying in the house you're not you're not leaving you might walk to this gas station with uh with a staff member and get cigarettes maybe once in a while the halfway house and stephen's point they let you have your car up there you can leave for hours at a time they don't track you just tell them when you're leaving tell them you know when he'll be back like it's so relaxed you can have your phone like you can have everything at tv you bring your own flat screen tv in your room like it's the most relaxed halfway house you could possibly have okay So I'm in the halfway house and I'm in the middle of nowhere, I don't know anybody.

And I already know that I was so close to our vacation that I wasn't trying to mess it up. So I'm getting, I'm not trying to, I'm not trying to mess it up. But I don't know anybody out there, so I really can't mess it up. like there's no i don't have any contacts out there but like it was so relaxed and since most people lived maybe 30 minutes to an hour away when you have like visits you can leave with your parents and stuff they usually just drop you after you get back but since my parents live three hours away they would let me leave for you know i leave at six in the morning drive back and i come back at midnight because i

have to drive all the way and walking and come back. And I always thought about, oh, I could go down there and get stuff and then just not use it until after they drug test me. And I never ended up doing that, though. But I always thought about it. But I'm at this halfway house. I was supposed to be here for three months. I was supposed to be here for three, four months, three, four months.

I'm supposed to be here. I've been here a month and a half, and this new guy comes in, who I get along with really well, turns out he is a, he's alcoholic, and since you can walk to the gas station, you know, you don't really have supervision on you. They breathalize you randomly, and they drug test you randomly, but he, they didn't test for alcohol in your urine, and they did breathalizers. So what he always did was wait till like bedtime because they're, they're typically from what I've even seen until I heard about what happened after the

situation. They're not, the third shift person is not going to wake you up to drug test you or to or to breathalize you unless you're coming back from like sometimes maybe work and they're told to do it by the first second shift staff so he would always wait till that time and i was like that's not a bad idea you know even they don't really and as long as like i don't leave you know even they don't really breathalize too often and as long as i don't leave i don't really give them a reason to breathalize me it is if you're not leaving they really don't drop you as much or breathalize you so if i'm doing something stupid i just don't i just don't leave for a couple of days so i know i'm good

but i i ended up drinking with this guy one night and he starts he gets out of control he gets out of control drinking and he almost starts a fight with another roommate so what happens earlier we had already got our round of breathalizers So we know we already got a breathalyzer. We're good. So we started drinking earlier in the day. We already got a breathalyzer. You don't get breathalized twice in a day.

It's very rarely. But breathalize you, he ends up making a scene, getting in a fight with one of his friend. And she decides to breathalize everyone again. And I'm like, oh, yeah, it's over with. So I hide in the bathroom for like 30 minutes. She's laying outside the door, eventually she leaves. I pretend I'm sleeping. And I go, I go to my bed.

I pretend I'm sleeping. She eventually pulls me and makes me blow into the breathalyzer. I blow into it. And she was like, well, why does it say this? And I was like, oh, I just, you see, I went to bed, I was, used my mouthwash. And she was, she wasn't buying the story, but she had to write the statement down. She was like, why are you lying to me? I'm like, that's my statement.

That is what happened. And it's mouthwash. I might have drank it, but it was mouthwash. So I get, me and him both get kicked out the halfway house. Now, since this happened, the whole place gets searched. And unbeknownst to me, they find, like, they find so much. they don't find so much stuff but the one thing that i got blamed for that wasn't mine they found you know what a wizinator is yes so they found it's a fake uh fake male organ that allows you to

pass a urine test yes and they had found one of these and since it wasn't it now it wasn't even in my room. It had nothing to do with me. But they had thought that it, I ended up getting blamed for it. I had got blamed for it. I don't know if every, from what I heard different parts of stories from everybody. I called everybody. People, everyone said it was mine, even though it wasn't, whatever. I'm not coming back anyway. So I've been in jail. I'm sitting in their jail. Now the halfway house is right here. The jail is literally across the street. So they're like, when the cops come, they literally arrest you and just walk you across the

street. But it is, I'm sitting in there waiting for her to see what my PO does. And it's been like a week. And they let him back into a halfway house. But they don't let me back in the halfway house. And I, I, I, it was because they had felt that I wasn't. Even though I had to stay sober until that point, I was always making jokes. And the way I carry myself very arrogant, didn't really care.

I didn't participate that much. I really didn't. I wasn't even trying to go through the motions with them. I'm like, I'm here. I'm sober after 90 days. I am not. I'm not going through the motions. So they didn't feel like a second chance was earned for me, I guess.

I didn't deserve it, but they let him go back. So I have to get sent back to, I have to get sent back to the Milwaukee prison now. Because no, I don't know what's happening. I don't know if I'm getting revoked or if, I don't know. what's happening. All I know is I'm not going back to that halfway house and I'm going back to this prison of Milwaukee. So they, and they were telling me you might be here a month before Milwaukee comes and gets you there. They take forever and I'm like, oh my God. Thank God they didn't take that long because these cell blocks are so, there's six cells to a cell block and maybe

three of them are being used. And there's literally a small TV, so small. It's a small and it's old it's bar style there's one table the visits are terrible it was just so bad it was so bad i don't and it was so weird they had because i got sent to the maximum security side i don't know why but they had a um a work release side but it wasn't they were they would let anybody stay over over there they just wouldn't let them leave for work even like there was a guy who had got caught for a murder. They sent him to the Huber facility. And I've sent over here in Max,

but they didn't let him leave the Huber facility. They just let him stay in a minimum part of the jail where I had to stay in the max. I think it's because I'm from a different county, all this, whatever. So they end up coming and picking me up a week after that week. So I've been there for two weeks. They come pick me up. So they come pick me up, take me back to Milwaukee.

Now, I don't know what's going to happen. I'm going through the process, and I get called out. And I think they call them liaisons came and saw me. A liaison came and saw me and said, we're going to give you a 90 day sanction and we want you to take this anger management program and try to spin it for yourself for drugs. Try to use the information they are teaching you for drugs

and we'll knock 15 days off your sentence. So you'll do 75 days on this sanction. And I'm like, all right now this might i mean i i i had done a month before i went to the halfway house i did two two months in the halfway house which was really freedom just not at home and now i had done the two weeks in this county jail but they didn't count those two weeks which is fine whatever they didn't count those two weeks but if they would have i would have got out for my my 21st birthday but they didn't.

So now I send me to this anger management program. And I'm in the prison. I'm doing the anger management program. And it's not, I am telling there, there is no getting any more time off your sentence. You can only, you can make it worse by getting kicked out of the program. But there's also like,

if I were to get into a fight and get charged with a battery, that might not only get me kicked out of the program, I might now actually get revoked because I'm not in there on revocation yet. So it's a really weird, it's a really weird thing. So I do the program, and I tell the instructor just how it is, I'm like, I want to use, I don't care,

like that is what I want to do. And she was like, I appreciate you being so on. And everyone's telling me to hear, shut up even though they're not even in there for door they're like be quiet you can't tell you can't tell her that stuff like you're gonna get held in here forever minutes like they're gonna tell your p. and i was like i'm like man i don't even give a fuck 75 days after that i'm gone it is what it is so i i have attitude every day i am doing my 75 days and i finally get released and from that point

I get released October 28th of 2022 and my birthday is October 18th so I was mad if they would have counted it two weeks in the last county jail it would have been all for my birth You got nothing coming bro I mean you can't expect one bit of lean anything

I agree I didn't have anything coming my way and I knew that I had I had already the whole time I had already skated my way through everything I got punishment but I had understood and this came with just being in and out of the jail for that like year period and and just being mature and being like older now even though I'm old I'm not I'm not old it had just like a switch had clicked in my head like this is clearly not working and I think being having all those open cases more so pressured me to try to get in as much as I could before I was going to get sent away because I thought I was going to go to prison so I felt like I could try to pressure me and now after I got out I like I'm still on papers and stuff I've been doing good I have like a year left on papers I've been out for a little over a year, about a year and a half. And now I'm doing good.

I'm working construction. And that's pretty much where we're at right now. That is where we're at. I mean, where are you staying now? Are your parents? Yeah, I stay with my parents because I have this plan that instead of taking out a mortgage, When my parents die, I have a brother and a sister, the house is going to get split into between the three of us. I know my brother and sister are going to try to sell it and get money.

So I'm trying to give, I'm giving my mom money to hold on to. So once she does, once that moment, God forbid, does come, there will be money. And the council, I can give it to my brother and says this is what the health is. work. This is what the house is worth. Take, here's your portion of it and I'm going to stay here and live here. Now I don't have to take a mortgage. I don't have to have debt. I don't have to do that.

So that's kind of what I'm doing right now. But yes, I am staying with my parents. I'm doing a lot of work. I'm working a lot. I'm working a lot of hours and I'm just and I mean, I talked to my PO the other day and she was like, man, I don't know how you did it.

you were helpless and i was like yeah i i don't know i just i just got old i got older and i mean you know i'm still such a kid i just i just got more mature i don't i don't i just knew that it wasn't this isn't gonna ever work there is no way to spin this and once you're on papers like i know if i do get like i like when i did get arrested just for that position of narcotics when I was jumping over the counter at the mall, like I couldn't bond out because I had a P.L hold. So I started realizing the severity of stuff

and how quick, because I had always been arrogant, oh, I can always bond out and all this. I'd start to realize the severity of what they really can do what they want. Yeah. You really don't have a say in it. You have zero saying it. Honestly, how much can you put your parents through?

How much more can you put your parents through? How much more can you put your parents? through right and my parents have been there the whole way they i put them through so much and they they you know they don't really know i try to explain to some they don't really know the they know a story but they don't know the full depth of how bad my addiction was but they know about oh i was selling drugs for a little bit they don't they don't they don't really not that they don't care but and they're my he's in jail. As long as it doesn't say like murder, like they, I'm sure they still don't

haven't even figured out that like I was charged with acid, but it, like, they just know that I'm in jail and I'm not doing their right thing, which is all that they need to know. They were going to the hearings and stuff. They were showing up. It's not that they didn't care, but it wasn't, I don't think they, they don't understand, my parents have never been in trouble. They've never done a drug in their life so they don't fully understand it.

They don't understand the legal system. They don't understand how a drug. work they don't really understand it like that so i was always able to swindle as i call it spin a story so it makes sense to my mom is why i did what i did or it was a friend's stuff or i'm sorry i didn't know what i was doing i'm still a kid and she would always come to my rescue right and so eventually at the halfway house that was like the breaking point for her

she was like after I got kicked out a halfway house she said whatever happens after this when you get released whether you get revoked

or not when you get released from this point on I am not getting you out I am not putting money on your books I am not going to do all that and so I

had always said that before but I could tell like the sincerity of this time like she really actually meant that she had always telling you you go back on them the bailing you out and she always did eventually so that's kind of the whole story all right and now you're working construction when you say construction you're doing snowplow is that construction I'm doing plowing right now because it's the winter, but mainly I, it's not, I guess it's hardscaping and landscaping. Like I build patios, retaining walls, stuff like that, walkways, the concrete, stuff like that. It's like a hardscaper, I would call it, but, and then during the winter, like I, I plow the medical college down here.

I plow the top of the parking garage so it doesn't collapse. But since the machine broke, there's a lot up there right now, and it might not, and I can't, I have nowhere to put it. So, yeah, they haven't called me in yet, so I don't know what. It's supposed to be reinforced, but, I mean, you've seen on the news that parking structures do collapse. Right. And there, like, there's nowhere left for us to put the snow. There's like a burner we dump it into to melt that we don't dump it off the side. the because it's so there are the other parking structures they do but they can only dump from like

two in the morning and six in the morning but we have a melter that you take here we use a plow and just plow it in there but we had already we plow at first we don't put it straight in the melter we put it to the side and then we start taking and we start taking it to the melter all at once once everything's been plowed so but the melter didn't turn on yesterday so it's uh i don't know what's going to happen but i guess so see what happens when they call me but it's pretty bad up there like i'm talking i think like the whole outside like there's a four-foot like it's like a four-foot with four-foot tall like and like all the way lined up around the whole parking garage at every like on the outside and the inside of it at every little edge like

there is and it's heavy snow it's bad but it's supposed to be reinforced for it so i guess we'll see what happens but well and in the winter i plow but in the in the summer and then fall and even in the winter when it's not snowing i'll do patios and stuff and walls concrete whatever i can listen bro i mean i'm glad you're doing better now you seem like you're in a better you know head space right better frame of mind Yeah, I understand that you can't just skate through everything. Like, you eventually, I have a saying, eventually you will fuck around and find out. Right.

They will. They can and they will. Right. They will show you. All right. Well, hold on one second. I appreciate you coming on and telling me the story. Because you're, you're, anyway, I'll. hold on a second hey i appreciate you guys watching do me a favor when you uh if you like the

video hit the subscribe button hit the bell so you get notified videos just like this also check the description uh box and uh all of my books are listed i wrote a bunch of books uh true crime books if you like true crime