Matthew Cox | Inside True Crime Podcast - How This Dark Web Dealer ESCAPED DEATH

Episode Date: July 16, 2025

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I wasn't on a bus. They made a special van, come to my house, pick me up, and deliver me to school. I wasn't by any other kids. They put me by myself. I think they said it was dead for six or seven minutes. Now, in this mental hospital, there's people. They have schizophrenia, bipolar. I had never had this problem before.

I had never thought about jumping over counters, robbing place. I never thought about that. apparently i i did it oh how they got this this angle of literally being like right next to me right stuff like that but eventually it went more into allegedly going online and ordering these it's a good to see the difference i made and honestly i never thought i'd make it this far i never thought I became hopeless eventually but it's not like I felt hopeless because like once you starts telling enough lies you really start believing yourself you really start to convince yourself that it is okay or you're like you actually you're fine like you really tell lie enough

you really do believe it listen I know that exactly because I've like I've run into people that I used to, you know, commit crimes with and talk to them, you know, and you're talking to them. I've had these conversations where they're like, well, you did this and you did that and you did this. And I'm like, well, wait a minute. I mean, I understand, but you knew that. No, I had no idea. I was like, what are you talking about? You wrote the real estate contract. You're the one that, you know, you're the one that went to the title company with me. You're the one that, you know, that that put the money in the bank, they deposit it. You're the one that increased the sales price.

You're the one that you start going through it. You can see it in their face where they start to, the look on their face is like, holy shit. Like, you knew the whole time this person didn't even exist. You made about $40,000 on that. If you didn't know what was fraud, why did I give you $40,000? Like, what are you talking about? And you can see it in their face.

And it's like, wow, you've been lying so long. you really believe that you weren't involved in the fraud. Like you were actively representing people that did not exist on a fraud scheme and you made hundreds of thousands of dollars. And then you went and you told the FBI I didn't do anything wrong. You blamed everything on me, which I get. But you've been lying to everybody you know this whole time that you weren't involved. And you actually now you look and you can see it in their face where they're just. just like, yeah, bro, you know what?

I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to talk to you. And they just like walk off. They'll like storm off. You can see that realization in their face when they realize, holy shit. And how many times have you met a friend from 20 years ago or 10 years ago and said, hey, remember we were at that party and this happened and that happened? They're like, or that wasn't Jimmy. That was Todd. And you're like, no, it was Jimmy.

And they're like, no, Todd was Todd, remember? We drove with him and this happened. And then suddenly you're like, holy shit. plus Todd. You would have sworn on a stack of Bibles. It was Jimmy. I mean, people's, our minds are, are very fucking

complex, man. There they are. So let's, let's start like at the, at the very, you know, at the beginning, like you were, I know you told me a little bit about it last night. Like you had a, your parents are non-traditional.

So, you know what I'm saying? That's a good, you know what I'm saying? They're not, you know, they're um um they're both deaf right both of them are deaf yeah so did you where were you born did you have any siblings yeah so i have i was born in milwaukee wisconsin um it's not it's a pretty big city um it's one i'm pretty sure it's in the top 10 um most dangerous cities I don't really think it's all that dangerous, but I mean, I grew up in it with both parents in the household. I have a half-brother and a sister.

I'm the youngest. My half-brother's the oldest. We're all three years apart. But I consider him my full brother because his dad really didn't, like, wasn't in the picture. And he was always living with us. So he's really my brother. But legally, he's my half-brother. So I have a brother and a sister.

My sister's three years older than me. My brother is three years older than her. And I just turned 22 two months ago. So I'm only, I'm just turned 22. So I know I look a lot older. I'm not sure what to say. No, you don't. Yeah, I said too.

When I grow up, when I grow all my beard, people tell me I'm 35, 40, I'm like, sheesh, that's harsh. That is rough. Oh, yeah, that's bad. But so I grew up in a regular household, went to public schools. My parents are deaf. But to me, like, that's, that's normal. It's a disability. My parents never went on to disability. They both worked. My mom is a, language teacher so obviously perfect job for her and my dad was a mechanic for a while and then he kind of had to stop doing that because you kind of need to listen to the sounds of that and then he he kind of like was jobless for a long time and we were just living on my mom's income so we were kind of this was when I was like younger and like three four years old so we didn't have that much money then but then as i got older maybe like 10 we finally got to move like out of Milwaukee but just to a suburb outside of it so i was still close to it but i wasn't in it so like my and my dad started getting other jobs and stuff and like that that only became like

middle class so like i guess i really grew up kind of more but that i don't remember that because was so young and then like after like 10 or so we became like middle class and everything was going good and went to normal public schools and high schools so i guess to start my story i guess i should start the first time i ever did anything was um was weed and i did it one time i did it one time with my aunt when I was 10 years old right when we had first moved out of Milwaukee. She had had some.

Right. So I smoked it for one time and then I didn't do it again. But I started right away at that age to pick up and buy it. And I started slowly

getting into working my way until like, because I knew people that were using. So I started to put one plus one on my head. If I can get it for cheaper and give it to them. I can make a little money. I'm a young kid. I can't even work. I'm lazy. So I'm trying to, you know, cheat, find the best way to get money as I can. So that goes on. Who are you? And you're telling this to what like other like kids? at school that you go to school with or friends kids at school and another big thing that

helped once I got to a little bit older like 14 15 once I entered high school the huge thing that helped is I'm a freshman my sister's a sophomore at the same high school and so now I have I know, you know, throughout, I'm hanging out with her friends. You have two groups of friends. Two groups of people. Right. And my sister kind of hated that I was hanging out with her friends. She really didn't like it, made her feel some type of way about it.

But she was also doing the same thing for a little bit, but on a smaller scale. but she never got caught for it. But so once I enter high school, now I am using. Now I am using, but I'm starting to sell a lot and it's okay. I'm getting it so cheap. I'm getting it so cheap that at first it was like I was just getting to do it for free. And then once I hit high, like, after like a year of high school, I've started to known everybody. So I'm the main supplier in that school.

And then, you know, obviously friends have friends and you grow your network that way. Where are you, I'm sorry, where are you getting this from? So since I'm in the suburbs, I'm going back down to Milwaukee where I used to live at first. Right. to go get it because I could get it for such a cheap price but eventually it went more into allegedly going online and ordering these

to a place so then I was getting it for such extremely cheap prices and it was the profit margins were so huge and so this goes along and at about 15, I move out of my house. I move out of my house and I go live with a friend. Why? What's the reason for that? A 15-year-olds do not read the house. You know,

that's the reason. Yeah. The reason I left was because my parents are deaf and yes, they are oblivious, but with that, having all that there, it's, it reeks. It reeks. Right. You know what I'm saying? And his parents were heavy, heavy opioid users and stuff like that. So his parents didn't care. So it was like, okay, perfect. I'll move in, I'll move in there and just do it, do it there. Not knowing later that, once I ended up moving in there I'm paying their mortgage their electricity got shut off I had to pay that I'm paying their car notes I'm feeding their habit right but it was it was okay because I had enough money to do it it was fine until you know after a couple months I move in there I had always seen his dad you know it started off with with crack i had always seen him you hitting the pipe always after a couple months i was like why is he always hitting that like it what is so good about that that he is always doing it like there's got

to be something to it so i ask him can i try and he he doesn't say no he says are you sure this is what you want to do and i said well you're doing it all the time it's got to be pretty great and he said i wouldn't recommend it but if you want to you can and i was like yeah i i do so i try it mind blown it's crazy so i end up um now i'm now i'm using and selling so now it's kind of especially feeding their habit and now so now since I have so much money to feed my own habit, it's like I really get deep into it. So after I do this for about a year, I'm stacking up money, I'm living there, I'm getting arguments with my parents through text, I'm not going to school,

I'm showing up, I think my reports that I showed up 56 days, that year to school. I'm not, I didn't get any truancy tickets. I'm, I'm just not going to school. But I kept, I kept good, I would only go on test grades. I didn't keep, I kept B's and C's though. Right. Every once in school, I only went on test days, took the test, and I'm gone.

Right. And I made, I made it work that way. So the story kind of really gets, screwed is my 16th birthday i turned 16 regular birthday i try this is where i try opiates for the first time now now that i'm now i tried that five days later i go to get my own stuff now the first time now the first time i had used it, I was under the supervision of my friend's parents. So now I'm doing it by myself for the second time. I have no idea what I'm even really doing.

Right. So it's like, so I pick up a certain amount way more than I should have for really a first time user and I do all of it. I do all of it. And I go to school that day. I lived five minutes from school. I do it immediately get in the car to go to school, five days after my birthday, go to school. And by the time I'm walking into the school after six minutes,

I can't even walk. I call my friend. He's carrying me to the bathroom. I'm vomiting on the floor of the high school. People are moving out of the way. He carries me, shoves me in a stall, and he kind of, he watches me. I tell him exactly what happened, because this was a friend that I was living with. So he had an understanding of it a little bit.

So he goes to the vending machine. buys me a gatorade. He gets me a gatorade and then clothes, puts me in the stall, locks the door, he goes back to class because he was getting truancy tickets. I don't know why I wasn't, but they were giving them to him, but they weren't giving them to me.

So he leaves me in there 20 minutes later. He comes back, checks on me, slides under the stall door to check on me. I'm done I'm out I'm pale I'm purple I'm blue

never even got to open the gatorade so he gets out he runs down to the office and he wasn't

a good kid so the principals hated him as well as me because they knew what I was doing as well

always going into school smelling but they didn't know it went to this now so he goes in the office he yells i need someone to come with me right now and he runs out obviously principals follow him they come running down they come into the bathroom they see me

they immediately we don't have a school resource officer there was none so they have to call 911 so they call 911 and now I, when this is happening, obviously, I'm, I'm dead. I'm dead. I think they said it was dead for six or seven minutes of that. So I'm, I'm dead in the bathroom. The police come, they immediate, he, he tells them not exactly what happened, but where he tells them a story where they can put together what they need to do to help me. But not the exact story, but obviously he tells them something where they know what they need to do to help me.

Right. So they do that. They cut open my favorite sweatshirt. Pissed about that because as I was waking up, I'm like, really, damn, they cut off my favorite sweatshirt. So mad. But as I'm waking up and coming to and seeing all the cops and ambulances coming through. and you know i'm just six i just turned 16 five days ago i as i'm coming to and waking up i'm like oh i am in so much trouble i like i already knew i'm like this is so bad this is over with

so they end up taking me to the hospital obviously they take me to the hospital to monitor me get it all out of my system and whatnot. A couple detectives came to talk to me. I told them, I don't want to talk to you. There's nothing I have to tell you. There's nothing you can do to help me because it's not like you can charge me with anything. I don't have anything.

So there's something for you to help me with. So I tell them to leave me alone. They get out of there. They talked a couple. My friends tell them to screw off. Same thing. nobody says he's got a drug problem nobody says it everybody says it nobody says it nobody tells them that but obviously they obviously know because of the narcan was used to bring me back

right so obviously they know something but they don't but i'm sure at that point they probably thought it was worse than what it was because it was really only my second time using which I mean, it's bad at that age. It's bad at that age, yeah. I mean, obviously, I already died. So it was pretty bad. I'm kind of a minimizer, as they like to say. I don't think.

So I'm in the hospital that they can't call my parents. So they're calling my mom's work. somebody has to go down go get her and tell them and because my parents have no idea what i'm doing they don't know why i moved out the house even they so they still have no idea that i'm even using so when they come they had like a oh this uh interpreter on a monitor for for my mom so she could understand so they could the nurse could explain what had happened right but my mom is such a trusting person like obviously she knew i what happened but she is such a trusting person that i told her you know it was one time thing it won't happen again like i'm scared for my life

like you see what happened like i won't do it again she's breaking down in tears like it's terrible so i'm stuck at the at the hospital for a couple days and they eventually come back no no i'm at the hospital for a couple days then they ship me over to um it's called moa it got tore down i've heard it's called Milwaukee mental health institute right so they stick me in there and why why the mental health why meant for mental health because they they they feel that i am so on they i think that they felt that number one that maybe i was intentionally trying to kill myself or that number two i am just so out of control i don't really know what's going on so but it's it's almost they i'm pretty sure

they have to do this they have to stick you in there and someone comes and sees me and I stayed there for a week and throughout the week my parents there's no phone in there it wouldn't have made a difference so they put me in Milwaukee Health Institute

now I do this for my own safety whether it's because they think I overdose on purpose or they think I'm just too out of control to handle myself because I'm not an adult yet. I just turned 16. So my parents come visit me. They're the only people that are allowed to visit me. There's no phone there. Wouldn't have mattered. I can't call them anyway. So they make you

stay there. There is no like release date. They make you stay there until the doctor tells you that you are deemed safe to go. Usually it's about a week. But if you're in there putting up a fight and doing dumb stuff they're going to keep you there however long they want what is that place like it's it's literally it's almost like a jail everyone has their own room but you're not locked in your it's almost like prison because you're not locked in your room you can go out of your room at any time except at bedtime you're supposed to stay in there but you can leave to get out to go to the nurse or something they make you go to school because I'm in the youth building at this time right so I'm making me go to school during this and then after it's just TV room it's there's just two TV rooms and they feed you three times a day and everyone's just waiting to see the doctor the doctor won't even see you until you've been there for a week and that's usually when most people get released but they want to so they can watch you for that week

but if you're in there putting up a fight or whatever or doing dumb stuff they're going to keep you longer okay so are there kids in there that you think is it mostly kind of drugs

or is it like kids that have like really severe problems I'm the only one in there for drugs I'm the only one in there is kids and there are people

throwing tantrums in there throwing stuff at at the at uh um the faculty the staff the nurses there are people fighting each other is it's a it's a bad place like i said it got tore down they don't take you outside to me the staff was fine i didn't have a problem of them i didn't talk to them they didn't talk to me until the day before i get released this caseworker comes to me and And she said, we're going to put what's called a chapter 51. So I don't, a chapter 51 basically says that I am incapable of being safe for myself or for others. But it was for myself.

They put a chapter 51 on me. That doesn't sound, that doesn't sound like it's good for you. yeah it wasn't good that doesn't sound like an immediate release no it didn't sound like an immediate release they put a chapter 51 on me the first time though they did let me out after a week

but I had to go see this woman and I get I have to go see this woman every week I have to check in drug test therapy I have to do it all And I'm doing it.

I'm working. I'm doing it. I'm still using cheating the system, you know, doing what I can. And then they put me on probation at the same time for it. They put me on juvenile probation and I had a chapter 51. It was a year of juvenile probation, but a chapter 51 is only six months long. So they put, so since I, since that happened at school, I have to go to a board meeting with all the superintendents to see if they want to let me back in their school or not. So I'm waiting.

I'm at home now. It's been a week. I get out. You know, I talk to my friends. I go see them, you know. So the meeting comes, we didn't really do anything. I just stayed at home I didn't do anything for this week

I stayed at home try to stay out of trouble and then the meeting comes up in my mind I already know the principles they hate me so especially so I already knew that it was I thought it was going to be

like I was going to be expelled that's what I thought was going to happen but you know I tried to I tried to plead my case you know I really want to finish high school, which I did. That wasn't a lot. I want to finish high school. I don't, I understand what I did was wrong and I don't want, I don't want to, I don't want to get kicked out expelled from school. I want to get my diploma. I don't want a GED. So what they ended up deciding on is

they didn't expel me. They put me in something called an alternative school. And they told me, so my high school would send the credits over that I needed and I would complete them at this alternative school and then my old high school would still give me their diploma but I wasn't allowed back on school property this day I'm still banned from the school property I'm not allowed on it they don't want me anywhere near it and that that's fine so I'm I'm I'm still doing the same stuff because I don't, I'm still, you know, feed my habit, going through emotions, feed my habit, and still selling, doing all that. And I'm doing good with my P.O.

Because I'm cheating the test. I'm not, I'm not being honest until one day this happened. This was a week before I was about. to be off my chapter 51. I end up getting so high. Well, let me take a step back. For some reason, at this school, they didn't allow me to be. They had, it wasn't a classroom because they weren't actually teaching stuff,

but there was like, it was almost like an office with a bunch of computers that everyone was doing their schoolwork in. But for me, I had named. made me go into a closet and locked me in there with a computer and i don't know why i think i think that i was so like you're dangerous so dangerous and like trying to like give drugs to so many people people and all this and i'm like okay whatever it ends up working out because i'm i'm just in there playing games the whole time they end up open you good yep bye you know whatever but one day i got I took way too much

I've fallen asleep they call my P.O. My P.O. comes He tries to drug test me. I don't have the stuff that I need to on me. So I'm like, I can't pee. I don't have to pee.

He's like, well, I'm going to sit here until school's over with him. I'm like, you can go ahead. If I have to pee, I will, knowing I had to pee so bad. But I didn't pee for him. He left. I'm sure he put,

He said, well, I'm going to have to put this down as a failure. And I said, look, you've got to do what you got to do. I'm sorry that I don't have to pee. So I go home, you know, whatever. Now, this is four days later, three days before my chapter 51 is about to end. So I'm still using an a couple days later after the same thing just happened. I used too much again. I end up ODing again.

And now I wasn't on a bus. They made a special van, like a special van. Come to my house, pick me up and deliver me to school. And that same one would pick me up and deliver me home. I wasn't by any other kids. They put me by myself. And same with being in the club. closet I wasn't around any other kid it's not like I couldn't go out and use the bathroom like

I could be but they just didn't want me really around other people it's not like I wasn't like allowed to but they try to keep as much distance without being rude to a juvenile as you can I guess right so I end up using too much I get into the van as soon as I'm throwing up throwing up up walking out of my house to get into the van. So I get in the van and close the door. Now it lights out. That's when it was, it was over for me. My P.O. was at school already to tell me how good of a job I've been doing.

So when I get to school and I do have some of the stuff on me because I was planning. I'm giving it to a friend at that school, who I knew before. I knew him a little bit before I even went to that school, a friend of a friend. So I had that on me. So I get to the school, the bus driver obviously notices I'm gone. Like I'm not getting up. I'm not getting out of your van. Like there's no response.

I'm pale. He was a former police officer, so he kind of, he kind of, he knows. So he, once he gets to the school, I'm sure they were already waiting there for me. My P.O. was there, but he wasn't there for that reason. He was there to tell me how good I've been doing. And my chapter 51 was just about to end, so I was so mad. So I, I, I ruin it. I get caught with with some stuff on me and now I'm back in the hospital, the regular hospital to make sure that it doesn't happen again after they bring me back to the life.

I see my P.O. He's mad. Whatever. I didn't care. I knew I screwed up the chapter 51. It was what it was. I was like so close to completing it's so mad because I don't know what they're going to do about this. so i go to the regular hospital same spiel they watch me for a couple days and then they send me right back to the health institute the milwaukee mental health institute and i'm like okay i've been through this once it'll be a week it'll be fine so now at this point i obviously ruined my chapter 51 so I'm waiting for a week to see the doctor. The doctor says, yeah, I'm fine.

I can leave, but I have to wait for my caseworker, not my probation officer. So you can't really get, I don't know if you can get revoked. I'm sure you can get revoked on juvenile probation, but they're going to do, that wasn't, the juvenile probation was kind of like extra. The chapter 51 was the main thing. He was just kind of like an add on, I guess. But he really didn't have too much power over me. He really didn't do much to me.

It was the Chapter 51's that fucked everything up. So I get when they, Doc tells me I can leave. I wait for a couple extra days for them to come back and talk to me about what's going to happen with my Chapter 51. So they give me another Chapter 51. And I'm like, oh my gosh, but they're like, this time you're not leaving. We're going to transport you to Winnebago Mental Health Institute. And this is three hours away from home. Right.

And I'm like, all right, whatever. I don't know what it's either. It's not like I have a choice to say, no, I told, I don't want to go. I don't, I don't have a, it's not like I have a say in it. So. Right. They ship me out there to Winnebago. I'm three hours away from home.

It's kind of like the same thing except this place has a phone and you can order a little bit of canteen. Now, this hospital is where if you're a juvenile and you are deemed incompetent, you know, in the courts. this is where they're going to send you and then they have like you have a mental illness you're so you're you're you're mentally ill and you're incompetent yeah and this is where they send people for you know competency evaluations this is where they send the juveniles and then they they have an adult one too called mandota but i was still a juvenile so this is where they send all those kids and they had they had a small drug program but uh it was maybe five people in it and the rest of the people that were there were there for let you know just being crazy

so i get there it's they drove me i get there like three in the morning it's terrible they held me they took me out of the other mental health mental health hospital held me in juvie for two or three days till the van got ready and after they told me i was getting another chapter 51 and i get shipped out to winnebago the two days in juvie the juvie was empty there was one other person in there it was a 12 year old who had got caught breaking into a firearm store and stole 47 firearms and they gave him like a year but i mean he was like 10 10 or 12 he was all and the whole other the complex is empty there's nobody else in this juby i'm like how can they afford to keep this open he was the only person in there before i came and he's the only person in there after i left

i don't know they keep keep this open so as i get sent to winnebago i get there like three in the morning immediately i'm trying to figure out what's my release date they they said we don't know yeah whatever blah blah blah so i get i guess not booked in but they take my name down pictures of me and they put me in my uh my room give me a bed and stuff like that but it's like the jail mattresses right so i'm in there and i'm so mad that they sent me there that i'm so mad that they sent me there that I and I'm so mad that they sent me there that I I'm refusing to do anything I'm in my room I'm not coming out for anything I'm telling them fuck that I'm I'm gonna sit in here until you guys let me out and after about a month because it's supposed to be a six month

program but some people complete it in three to four months but it's normally a six month program which is the perfect amount of the chapter 51 but i was like no i'm not doing no programming eventually after a month they come up to me and tell me if you don't because you have to level up to you know get released there's six levels but you can get released after the fourth level you know and it takes you have to like petition to level up and stuff and act good and right why you think you deserve it and participate in group and all this stuff and i was just like not trying to really do that so i was like forget it i'm gonna lock myself from my room one month after i've been doing this not coming not not doing anything being in my room they come and tell me

if you don't participate you're never going to get released because you're never going to get to the certain step so if you don't get to the step you're not going to get released and i'm like well you guys can't hold me here forever and i'm like well if you're not showing an effort to either they're just going to keep redeeming you unfit and you're just going to keep you're just going to stay here you're not going anywhere right and i was like oh man i'm like that's not good and i was like i already wasted a month not trying to do anything right yeah i don't know how it is for juveniles but for adults they can keep you forever yeah no they uh they definitely definitely kept. There were people in there for, you know, a year already. They were keeping people

for a minute. But most of them weren't in the drug program. That's also a different thing. So I was like, okay, my parents are coming up to visit me. I'm explaining it to them. And I'm like, okay so now I just have to I just have to kiss ass and pretend like I care right so and in my mind I'm like this is really a better thing I didn't waste this month because it actually ends up helping me in the end because of how stubborn I was at the beginning any type of going to groups was a major improvement because at first I wasn't going. So I'm starting to go through the groups. The process is there.

I'm still going to school at this point too. I have school and group. My alternative school is sending the work over there. They're printing it off for me. I'm still going to school. I'm still having, you know, to go to these drug groups. And nobody in there wanted to be sober. The five people that were in the drug groups,

nobody wanted to actually be clean. But irrelevant. You all, they had already been there before. So they were catching me up and explaining this is how you have to do it if you want to get out of here. And I'm like, okay, I understood. Got it. So, you know, in this mental hospital, there's people.

cutting themselves and they really don't they have doctors there and for stuff like that and it's so crazy because i know they kind of do it to adults but to juveniles they'll just give you meds that you're just you're just you're just a body at that point they will sorry who else is there i mean you said one thing you said cutting themselves they're like kids there was schizophrenia are there kids that are they talking themselves i mean not to the yeah there's there are kids talking in themselves and this is a 18 and below pod there's two wings but like i went there in the winter but during the summer during like outdoor wreck time i guess you could call it we we could go out with the other other side but other than that we really didn't see them

but this was the 18 and under. But yeah, there's people with schizophrenia. There's people that are cutting themselves. And then there's probably, maybe a total of 50 people in both wings. And only five. And there's also a girl's side too. And only five boys and like five girls are in the drug program.

Everyone else is there for, you know, they have schizophrenia, bipolar they have whatever they have they're you know getting into fights their little kids are screaming pout and fighting and put up a fight they'll hit they're hitting the staff the guards all types of stuff now I'm in the program I'm doing all right

it's been a month I'm still level one but I'm coming to I'm accepting that if I don't do, if I don't do this program, I am not going to get out of here. So I've come to that realization. And it was really weird because they have a juvenile and adult side, obviously, but I've seemed like the juveniles, even though I was 16 at the time, they were like 8 to 12, a majority of them was. And it just felt like so weird that at that. age that they would just be taken away from their family like that and for so long periods of

time because they're not in the drug program so i don't know like how i know that they have you know they hear voices and all that but i don't understand how they justify you know they want to harm themselves they put them in there whatever but at that young of an age it just seems like kind of crazy there is i was probably i was the second oldest there was one person who was who came later that was 17 and ended up turning 18 and they got moved to the adult unit but i'm i'm in the program i'm doing my schooling i'm doing i'm doing my program and i'm going just just pretending like i care giving them the answers that i know they want to hear so I'm trying to, you know, scheme my way out of this.

And it's, it's working because at first I, I, you know, I gave them a month of nothing. So any participation is improvement. Right. So at that point, at that point, it became, it became so like, so, so, so, I guess, nice to have my presence in the group that eventually I got to the point where I could just play solitaire by myself the whole group because I was still in group and I would participate and they would let me still move up the levels and I at first I didn't have a a bunky it's not really a bunky it's two it's two separate beds in a room and um they have a um like these mp3 players that have

pre-downloaded music or whatever you can use them they charge them it's not a anything good it's not touch screen it was literally whatever the first um i what are they ipads or uh oh oh ipads yeah yeah yeah a shuffle that's what they were called the shuffle yes so it was it was it was it was helpful though but i mean it didn't have anything good on there so eventually a long time i get a bunk i get a bunky and I noticed this guy, he's not in the drug program. He's in there for something else. But I always, whenever I come back from school or I would come back from the drug program,

I would notice he was always sleeping. And that's not how most of the other people were. There were a lot of people in there cutting themselves still. I don't know how they were doing it, but they were. like there would be people with egregious marsh just up and down like you could see like it was terrible like hundreds of cuts on them I'm not really sure how they were doing it. Previous scars opening up, whatever. I got a bunkey and I wanted to know how he was able to sleep his time away.

I would always get so mad at people because I couldn't do that. I can't just sleep all day. I would get so mad. No, I found out that he was taking this medication called, I don't know if it's pronounced Haldol or Haldol, but it'll play a part. later in the story he told me that's what kept his voices uh out of his head and he was able to sleep all day so i can i just kept that i just always remember that i asked him for his medication a few times so i could try to but he was too scared to do it so he never really gave me it so

it i just always remembered it because it was such a weird name of of it and i noticed he was always sleeping so a couple like uh now i'm on my month too i'm probably i think i'm i'm level two and there was this one kid he was a really he was probably six two and maybe 200 pounds he wasn't fat you know he wasn't skinny but he was uh He was definitely really insane and because I went in there when it was winter months and eventually it was the end of winter months. It was like it was the end of winter months. So they're starting to open up the yard and it's still cold, but you still go out there just to get some fresh air. So it's like a small, it's just a it's literally a like a kids playground that you would see at school and it's just fenced.

in but no barbed wire just maybe a 10 foot tall fence and he had always talked about jumping over the fence because on the other side of the fence is just a parking lot where the staff parks are if you get a visit that that's where they park so i always seemed like i know i could get someone to just pull i thought he got me thinking that i could i could definitely climb a fence so fast if I had someone waiting there, I could get out so fast, too. It wouldn't be a problem. But I never, I thought about it, but I never put like actually real thought into it. It was just scenarios that played through my head, knowing that I could do it.

But he kept talking to me about it. And eventually he came to the point where he did try to hop this fence. and so while he gets over the fence and he just takes off and starts running so they bring us all back in they lock this down eventually they bring him in on like on like a like a stretcher almost but he is I don't it's almost like what they put it's not the yeah it's said no it is a stretcher but it has like the cuffs on them so you know his hands are locked to the to the board and his legs are locked to the board he can't and they keep you know he's being disrespectful fighting with staff and they don't do anything like they don't try to really talk you out of it their plan is okay we're giving him

they were giving him i don't know what the shot was but it was always just called the shot we're giving them the shot and they would they would leave you on the board give you the shot check up on you every 30 minutes and it's supposed to put you to sleep right or relax you but put you to sleep is what it did i never got the shot but just from what i seen and they had to give this man like four shots to get him to get him to finally go to get some sleep now while i'm in there i'm after this happens, I end up, there was a big case that went on in in Wisconsin. It was called the Slenderman Stabbings. I don't know if you heard about it.

So basically this girl, and she was in my class, and I laid her, she told me what she was in there for. I didn't believe it. But after I got out and looked it out, I had heard about it, but I never knew. I got up and looked up and knew that it was true because I seen her picture. sure her name and it all made sense yeah the slender man yeah slim man or he's like a it's like a fictitious yeah yeah so her her story is um they don't it's not really like that much of a backstory to it but the story of what she did pretty much is um her her and one of her friends her and one of her friends at the young age of like 10 are watching.

I think they're going on, I want to say it's maybe there was a website, but it was like a Slenderman chat in like videos. And like they started like really believing that like her friend really ended up mainly like convincing her that we were supposed to invite this friend over, take her into the woods and kill. her as a sacrifice to Slenderman. And it's just so crazy.

It's so bizarre at such a young age, like how it happened. So that is exactly what happened. She got stabbed 20 times, but she ended up surviving. She crawled out, eventually made it out of the woods, ended up surviving. And what's so crazy, and I get at such a young age, but she ended up surviving. getting like 25 years in the mental health institute she got out after like 10 maybe not even right after and the other girl got sent to jail and she got she i don't know why one went to the mental hospital one went to jail when i think it if they had to put them in in separate ways

it should have been switched the other person that was in jail that convinced the person to stab her should have been the one in the mental institute and the one that stabbed her should have been in jail, but it was the other way around. But so she she's not like she bragged about her anything. I just always asked, I just

always was nosy, was wondering why people were in there. There's nothing to talk about time goes by. You know, you make conversation. So she told me very, very vague about it. And I was like, yeah, whatever. She's crazy. But I mean, it, it, she is.

is but it's really what happened so now i now i um after i i after this guy is probably i'm like two months in or maybe yeah like two and a half months and i'm just doing my program the one guy who was i told you 17 and going to turn 18. towards the end of it. He had a visit. And at this facility, you were allowed to wear your own clothes. They would provide you clothing, but you could have your parents bring you your own clothes, but obviously, you know, it's going through searches, you know, all your clothes are getting

searched before they get in. So there's no contraband and stuff like that. But the visits, they don't search the visitors. so this they strip search you after you have a visit but that's a that's about that's about it

but this one guy that was in the drug program with me he had got his people to come visit so he after the visit he had planned to get some stuff brought in some some like

adderals and morphine pills just silly little stuff. And then his parents also, I don't know if it was his parents that actually visited him, but whoever visited him brought him some clothes to.

And when they searched the clothes while they were in the visit, just to get it over with, they found drugs in his clothing that his family had actually, or whoever brought it had actually forgotten to take it out. like you left drugs in my like this red flag especially when you know that like i'm trying

to bring him in like you know they're going to search that so he gets pulled out of his visit and he gets strip searched and as he's getting strip searched he told me you know he turned and he's doing the strip search he squat and call as he he does that he had two packages up there apparently and one of them fell out as they were doing the strip search But there's not like, it's not, it's not like they can, he's, all they, all they basically do is going to restart your program. They're just going to, you know, they're not, they're not going to charge you, unless it's a major amount of drugs or something, but a couple of pills.

They're not, they're not going to charge you. They're not, they're not going to put you to jail. You know, they're just going to restart your program because clearly you have a problem. Right. So, so that, that ends up happen. and but only one of the packages fell out so one of them got in okay so he ends up after his after the strips there he ends up getting his package out or whatever and he's he's he's dispersing it and he he's dispersing it um and

I was the one of the only ones who didn't take something. He's dispersing it because I when I'm when I'm locked up or away or gone when I'm not in the middle of my addiction or when I come home and have freedom I'm not actively trying to use when I'm in jail I'm not actively trying to use even if I come across it I know it sounds crazy but like I wouldn't if I was on the streets I would have said yes but if I was a deal I'd say no even though I had the money to afford it right very very bizarre but so he gets a package and he disperses it's not it's a couple of them it's not much people are high for a couple of days maybe and then they decide one after that happened a couple of days later

they decide to drug test everybody to see people talk, whatever, I don't know, what happened, or they just decided to do it because of the visit that happened, see if he maybe took drugs during the visit, swallowed them a couple to see what actually went on. So they drug test the whole unit. And everyone that was in the drug program, which isn't that many people. like I said it was like five boys and five girls not that much so they everyone takes a a piss test the girls didn't only the guys did but everybody that was in the drug program failed everyone else didn't fail I was the only person that didn't and that's what really got me to

getting into my last step of giving out because I was the only one who didn't get high that I it was a six it's normally a four to six month program and I completed it in three months but really only two months because the first month I didn't do anything I rebelled so that really like

kind of cut a lot of time off I guess it really made them believe in me that I was actually changed so that cut a lot of time off and the girls were doing the same thing with visits they were getting rollers brought in and stuff and i i don't think they ever got caught up with that i'm pretty sure nobody did they never got caught up with that so but it was it was happening so whatever um so now i'm getting closer to you know three three three months, I finally level up. I've been there about three months. There's six levels, but you can go home once you reach level four. You can, they might say no, but more 95% of the time at level four, they're going to let you go home. So it's around the three month mark. I finally get to level four. And they make you do so, so much stuff that they don't tell you beforehand. and to try to set up to make your stay just a little bit longer.

Like, in order to leave, you have to have outpatient already set up. And it has to, you have to have not just set up, but it needs to be within like 72 hours within your release date. You need to have an appointment already set up. And, you know, my PO came up there once and visited me. it wasn't a I don't even know why he came up there I think he just wanted to come up there it's not like we talked about any

I mean we talked about yeah I was getting I was getting out soon and that was about it and he was like you know you still got three months left of your chapter 51 and I like I said I had a PO and a case worker for the chapter 51 they were separate but they did work together to try to help me but so

I am almost going home it's it's like two I'm a level four and we're going to chow one day and I bring my what I would do to pass most of my time was Solidair and Sudoku books right and I brought a Sudoku book down to the lunch room And this lady was being so mean to me about it. She considered it contraband. And a couple days before I was going to go home, and immediately extended my stay two weeks. I was literally like two days from the door.

I was so heartbroken. I spent the rest of those two weeks in my room. I was so, I was actually crying. I was so upset that it was so bogus. I ended up arguing with them. It ends up being more like they want to see. They want me to keep me in there for two more weeks. But since I'm getting out, they need to have a conference call.

They need to have a conference call with my PO, my caseworker on the streets for the Chapter 51. And I guess my counselor in there and my teachers, like everyone, needed to be on this conference call. So they set up the conference call. My parents, obviously, since they're deaf, they came up there. And I didn't know that this was going to play a major role in this. But they come up there for the phone call and interpreting it for them and stuff. and they want me to stay two weeks for it.

But the counselors and all, they were like, he's doing good. We think he's ready to go home. It's just he, you know, he had this mistake and brought contraband down to the lunchroom or child room. And it was, they were making, the half people were making. a big deal about it and the other half weren't, but the important people weren't making a big deal about it. So they were like, okay, we're going to set your release date for one more week in advance. So, and well, my parents are like, well, we already have the outpatient appointment

in two more days and we're already here. We can't come get them later. And I can't. And I kind of told my parents to say that because they don't know sign language so they don't know that i'm telling my parents this so i'm telling my parents this and they bring up that argument you know we're already here like he's already at the level he needs to be this is silly he's ready to come home right he did the program like you guys asked he still has outpatient he's got everything up so they end up taking it they end up accepting it and being like okay you're you can go you can go so I I was so happy I had to go get all my stuff ready you know I had to I it's not like I didn't have canteen but I had I didn't I never got clothes brought up there but I had a pair of shoes

brought up there so I wasn't always wearing slippers because all they would give you is those jail slippers. Yeah. So I was like, I don't want to wear those for six months if I was going to be there that long. Right. I don't want to wear them. So they end up accepting it and they let me out. I, my PO, who was on, he was on the phone call, meets me at my house as I'm pulling in.

and I'm already on the way home since I live so far I'm already planning to go get some stuff I already have I already haven't been planning it all along but now that I'm on the way home I'm already texting the right people you know I'm already making it a plan when my P.O's at my health and so I know that he's there now I okay he he I dropped for him you obviously clean and so I know okay boom as soon as he left I'm up the door I left went to go went to go get uh go get some stuff now when I went I went I got some

stuff came home to use it and when I when I um when I was doing it it wasn't the same as it was before so it like it didn't give me the same feeling it almost made me feel like like i was dying like i was having a heart attack almost so now this is the same day i got released probably around two three plus a three hour ride home maybe i got i think i got released at noon and I got home at maybe three or four is probably what happened. And so I come my home. I'm like, I don't, I don't even want to, I don't even want to do this. It literally feels like I'm dying. So even though I didn't get like that much stuff. I was like, I just want to get rid of it. So my friend says, yeah, I know someone to get rid of it too. And I'm like,

okay, cool. So he comes. I sneak out of my parents' house. Because I mean, how are, they're not going to hear me open the door and I just walk out. I'm really sneaking out. It's just walking out the door. So I do that. I don't tell my parents I'm leaving and this guy picks me

up in it with his friend in a stolen vehicle and did not tell me. I didn't find out till after five minutes we left the house and eventually we

get pulled over and I know I got this stuff on me and like is everything good you know you got your papers and all that he's like yeah yeah I'm good no he was not good so the sheriffs obviously you know they pull us over they don't even come to the door they get a couple more cars to pull up and then you know they all get out and you know get out step out the vehicle you know with their guns and stuff And I'm like, oh, man, I just got out. I was like, no, like eight hours later, and now I'm actually going to jail. I'm like, I literally just got out of this program.

I'm like, this is ridiculous. And I obviously had that stuff in my back. I hadn't in my backpack, but it was near me. I got charged with this juvenile charge. But it didn't. It didn't reset my chapter 51. Because what had happened, I got, first, when I, after I exited the vehicle, one thing is my phone fell out of my pocket. I didn't know I was supposed to try to pick that up.

When I went to go pick it up, oh my gosh, they all yelled at me, thought I was going to pick up a gun or something because I was getting pulled out the stolen vehicle. Right. So it was like really insane. but I had this stuff in a gum wrapper. This stuff. And I get booked in. They go through all my stuff. They don't find it.

So I get put in the cell. I'm in the adult jail, but I'm only, you know, still 16. So they put me in a different uniform and they have to keep me in booking in a single cell by myself. I'm never allowed out because I can't be around

adults obviously so i can't be around adults so i'm stuck in there i they have like a phone you know i can bring to your door so you can like get it through the food port and make a call obviously but i can't i have to call a friend and be like hey you want to text my mom that you know i'm in here and uh come visit me and of course you know they they do it of course she she's furious But when she gets down there, my P.O. tried to tell her, no, you can't visit him. And she starts making a whole scene. She's like, how do you expect me to keep in contact with my child? I can't call him on the phone.

He can't call me. You have no right to not let me see my child and all this. So he has to end up getting his supervisor down there. and his supervisor goes on my mom's side. Supervisor goes on my mom's side and lets my mom see me. So they bring me out to this small. Because they don't really have visitation and booking. You know what I mean?

There's no visitation and booking. But there's a small room that has, it's like an ancient TV, not like the kiosk that they have. It was like a bubble TV that had a camera on it. I was able to see my parents and I got to visit. And my P.O. Wanted to send me to a halfway house at that time. My parents talked to me about it.

And I'm like, no, don't listen to that. No halfway house, because they're my. legal guardians if they don't say yes they can't real they have to make they have to file the right procedures to tag us take away uh guardianship so i actually even though i kind of even though i'm on juvenile probation was real i didn't really i'm there's the juvenile p.o is still not my guardian he can't just do whatever he wants right as as like an adult p.o kind of can so this he wants to send me to my halfway house i convinced my parents it's not a good idea they it's a terrible idea and they they believe it they accept it they believe it they're like

okay well we'll we'll talk to him we'll see what we can do um and so this was the first day then that this was in the first couple of days i only stayed in there for a week but On like the fifth day after I had been in myself, they came to me and said, when you got arrested, did you have this on you? And I said, oh, no, I didn't. I didn't have that on me. They would have found it when they searched everything when they booked it in. And they were like, yeah, no, no, no, I get that book. We rewent through your stuff.

And now this is in there. and I'm like, well, that's not me. That's strange. Yeah, that's very weird. Do you think maybe the police planted it? Yeah, that's right. That's what I'm telling them. I'm like, that's so crazy because they already searched my stuff.

So insane. How did that get in there? So they still end up charging me with it, but they didn't end up charging me with bringing consciousness. contraband into a institution. They discharged me with possession. And it didn't, it didn't, since it wasn't, they really didn't have a real case because it's been so long since I,

like they found it five days later and not I mean. They had already searched my stuff. Like they, it would have been very difficult for them to, to, to, I guess, prove that now because they had already looked through my stuff and it had already been put away. I don't know what made them go through it again, but

So do they, but you said they charge you with it? They do charge me with it, yeah. Do they drop me? They end up no, so they end up, I keep fighting the cases so they keep giving me

DPAs. So after what, so they don't while this is going on, I don't get revoked. They want to send me to a half halfway house. A halfway house is a really long time. So I told them that I would go to a rehab, an inpatient rehab, because it's only 30 days. I get out. I'm done. And it'll get them off my back. And since I already just did like a drug program, you know, they'll take, they'll take what they can get, you know, maybe it's just a minor slip up even this exact same day I got out. But whatever.

So they, uh, I had got, I had got to the seventh day after I was there for a week. They had made the plan that they were going to send me to a rehab in Chicago, Illinois. Okay. Two hours from my, two hours from my house. And I had, I had been okay with it. I've accepted it. So the bus, the, um, there's no bus that takes me. The sheriffs personally have to drive me to the rehab, even though I don't know how they're allowed to do it because the sheriffs, that's out of their jurisdiction.

They weren't federal, and I know that because one of the sheriffs that drove me was one of my classmates' dads. So he knew who I was. So it wasn't really a secret. So they transport you? Yeah, they transport me all the way. I transport me out of Wisconsin to Illinois down to, I don't think it's actually in Chicago, but it's near Chicago anyway. So I do this, I'm now I'm doing this 30-day drug, inpatient rehab. I live there.

I sleep there, but it's a, since it's a private rehab, like it's amenities, you know, it goes through your insurance. It's nice. It's nice. You know, like, it's actually a nice place to be. The only thing that sucked is there's literally groups all day long. Like, you don't have free time. That's the only thing that sucked.

But so while I'm in there, I, my parents come up and visit me. and I had talked to this one guy in there and I was like what why are you in here I'm talking to everybody find out their stories they're figuring out what people are in there for and just hearing people's stories you know see who I'm around and this one guy told me he was like oh yeah I I use DXM so and I'm like well what is that and basically cold medicine like if you um if you see anything that has like if you buy mucinx or whatever and it says dm it's because it has dxm in it it's a it's a it's a hallucinogenic right and i had never never done this but i convinced my parents while they're visiting me i convinced one of them to leave and go to the store, allegedly, and buy this and bring it back and give it to me because the nurse wouldn't give me the right meds, and I'm really sick. I have a really bad cold, and I need a whole box of this, right?

So they leave. One of my parents' leaves gets it and brings it back along with a vape. They brought me in a vape and stuff, a charger. They hooked me up. and they let you have this the drug the drug people let you the no they had no idea no they had no they had no i mean don't they see your parents bring it in and don't they search you no they do they go through they don't search you really they'll go through your stuff every once in a while but they don't search your visitor so my dad had left saying i'm just going to the store real

quick and came back and they're not going to search him and they they visit in your unit all the parents come they have like couches in there and stuff and my parents you know on the slide just slip me the box and a babe i just put in my pocket and it is what it is and so i end up taking like 10 of these things because that's what i was told to to do by this guy and now we end up having um they had like basketball they like their rec time was like basketball so after visits were over i i was starting to feel this now i'm starting to feel it and i'm kind of i'm not freaking out but it's it's very uncomfortable because i know that nobody else knows besides the two people i told or whatever right the feeling of it was not a good feeling i couldn't imagine

why someone would be addicted to this it is there is no good feeling at all there is none of that and um this guy i mean he he he was so Out there, like he told me, one time he had overdosed on this stuff because he took like 50 pills. And he told me that he had saw aliens at the hospital and they were purple and all types of stuff. And I'm like, oh my gosh. And I was like, yeah, I'm not going to take that much, but I'll dabble with it. See what it does. Not a good feeling.

It's uncomfortable. You do, you feel queasy like you're going to throw up. up and they put something in the medicine so people do feel that way so they don't abuse it. Right. So I'm feeling queasy, but I don't throw up. I am just walking laps around the gym. All right. So I'm walking laps around the gym and I'm walking around their basketball game.

And that's not normal for me. Normally I would participate, but they can't really, they don't know what's normal and what's not normal. I mean, I'm just doing something else for a day because somebody was walking with me, a one person. I was telling, man, I don't feel good. My whole body is itching. I'm thinking I'm allergic to it. Like, I can't. My whole body's itching.

It's terrible. And it lasts for so long. It was just the worst thing I had ever experienced. It was so bad. It was the worst thing I'd ever experienced. And he had gotten me to believe that that's normal. It's a first time thing. When you do it again, a second time and a third time, you won't have those initial feelings. But I never ended up doing it again at that place. I gave, because a box of it has a lot, so I split the load up between. me and him. I gave him most of it, though. But I end up, I do this program and it's not really, I mean, it's a decent program. It's just more like a, I just feel like they don't really care because regardless after 30 days, you're out the door. You don't have to make any progress. You don't really have to do anything. I was already doing it just to, because they can let you

about like three days early and I was like if I can get three days on my sentence I'll participate whatever because it was like otherwise if I wasn't participating I had to be in my room all day and they didn't have the iPod shuffle they didn't have the iPod shuffle so I couldn't I had nothing to do in my room all day um so it was like whatever so as you get through the program right I mean you get through that program and they let you out or yeah I get through the program they let me out so now i'm getting close i'm i'm getting close i'm still going through the court system for those charges and stuff and those things keep getting what's called a dpa you know if you know what that is it's a deferred prosecution agreement okay so it's kind of it's like uh hey if

you know if you know what that is it's a deferred prosecution agreement okay so it's kind of like uh hey if you do this like you know if you go to this treatment then you know we agree to drop the charges or if you do you know whatever you you know stay clean for this long we'll drop the charges you know whatever they had wanted me to do if they wanted me to go to drug court or whatever whatever but that's that's not what they had me do so I um I finished the program I'm still going through the court system. I'm still on my chapter 51. And now I'm doing all right.

I'm doing fine. Now at this point, I had found such a way to try to. I just found ways to try to. cheat the system because I found out at this time if I was going my P.O. really wasn't dropping me and I was almost finished with probation at this time because it's almost been a year and I only had a year on there. So I'm going to my um I'm going to my um my uh I had to go to therapy after I got out. I'm going to see her. I almost want to say it started off like three times a week.

And I progressively got down like once a month. But it took forever because I was so stubborn and trying to tell them I don't have a problem. You guys are a problem. I have, yes, I see what it looks like. But I've only used it a few times. And I've just been unlucky. I don't have a problem. Right.

so and I'm I'm starting to believe myself a little bit maybe I'm starting because I have the system full so now I can't have myself full but they watch so and I'm still keeping my I'm this goes on for a long time and until I'm about until about 17 goes on for a little bit I'm doing good I'm going through the court and And at 17, I was still, while I was going through these programs, I had always had someone take care of my operation, right? So there was still money coming in. I had someone take care of it. When I came home, I would take back over and fix it all up, even though they were never really real problems with my operation. But I ended up taking it back over. and so now right as I am turning I do I'm still going through the court system and what had happened was I'm doing I'm doing good I have been out for like a year of anything so this is a year span that I've just been doing good and haven't caught any new charges haven't been failed my drug test, been going to therapy.

I've been doing everything they've asked of me. I've been doing everything that has been asked of me. And I'm taking care of the operation. And so COVID ends up hitting, COVID, no, COVID hasn't hit yet. So I'm still doing my thing. And a year goes by, and as soon as I turn 18 within, a couple months I get my door

I get my my my house rated why so somebody set you up yeah okay so what had happened when I read the discovery is

I know what actually happened but this guy had bought a THC cartridge not from me not from me he had gotten something else from me okay left my house and they kind of got on to me because neighbors I was getting lazy and you know serving out of my house as you should never do right so I'm I'm making it easy for them I'm not even leaving they can really surveil me and my neighbors are calling because i lived in a cul-de-sac so it's always full of cars like a like a drive-through and my neighbors are are pissed you know they don't

understandable it's whatever it's whatever so understandable so they pull one this guy over as he gets a couple blocks away from my house so i'm i don't see it or whatever And since he didn't want to pay the ticket for a THC cartridge, he was like, oh, I will definitely tell you where I got it from, which is not from me, but he said it was from me. So he cooperates with them where it does some buys on me, you know, and does some buys on me. and, you know, they got the evidence they needed, you know, and it's, it's only, it's now 24. So this was, like, five years ago, like technology is good. Right. There are cameras everywhere.

Right. And even, like, my backyard, the way my house was set up is I had, like, it was the shape of a football field of a one square acre and then it had like it was a rectangle like perfect and it had tree lines side street and then a a shopping mall it was like wall greens planet fitness like all this stuff so even there was cameras that could see my house even if i like was like there was like even like other people who didn't have like ring cameras weren't that big at that time my house was always being could have always been surveilled and i didn't really think about it i was like oh i have the tree line like they don't have cameras in the back no one whatever they have to subpoena those and really

pull them and i don't know how they got some of some of these these pictures because they are like i mean they are like i can show you some of the pictures i have them but it's like there's pictures of like they're literally like standing right next to me i'm like how did you you get that angle? I would have, you were not right there. Right. And when I end up getting my health rated,

obviously they, um, they try to knock on the door, serve the search warrant. I'm, I'm in my basement sleeping. And obviously my parents are not hearing that. So I don't know if they even knocked or if they just assumed that no one was going

to open the door. The parents are deaf. there's you don't you kind of have to open it no one's going to hear you knocking or ringing the doorbell so i i hear them break in my front door it's like four in the morning they go through the first level obviously they wake up my parents with you know guns in their faces my parents are you know it was only my mom my mom was the only one there my dad was at work at this time but he had rushed home as soon as my mom texted him about it now i had heard them break in but i sleep with the tv on so i thought it was my tv playing a police show and i had time

to get rid of stuff but i didn't i didn't realize until they opened my basement door and told me to come up there and i'm like oh yeah i've nowhere to put all this stuff so i go up there and I get everything my house is completely torn to shreds. It's over with like everything is torn to shreds. They rip the couches up. Like they literally do everything. They they find there was I was I never really hit anything who's literally in a closet, but they tore apart the whole house. So I end up getting arrested and they take me in and they book me and that's that's like the start of my adult charges and i'm still fighting the juvenile charges and that's how it like all came

up so many it came up like this so these are some of the the pictures and i don't know how they got this this angle of literally being like right next to me right stuff like that but But they, they, I don't know, it's, technology is so crazy, whatever. When they ended up arresting me, they told me for all, you know, we could have had drones. We're not telling you how we did it. So I am. So what happened? You got brought downtown, fingerprinted, Southwest, the whole thing.

That's your picture taken. I got, yeah, got it all. And I get, I obviously get sat down by some detectives. now they're there they're i get charged first off i get charged with manufacturing t hc i get charged with possession with intent to deliver lSD i get charged with possession of maintaining a drug home or i mean maintaining a drug trafficking place maintaining a drug vehicle um I caught a couple of bail jumpings because my juvenile cases were still going on, but I wasn't really out on bond for those.

But there was nothing. Now that I'm 18, I can actually get bond. And I wasn't on my chapter 51 and I wasn't on probation anywhere. So there was only that I was saying I couldn't get bond. But I get charged with possession of narcotics as well and possession of crack cocaine. And I get all these charges. and you know and I get I they sent me down they weren't all that they were more very interested in the tabs the LSD tabs that was their main focus because I don't know if it's it is a unique thing but they had um um a They had a federal guy in there with them because he had questions about that

because it's not something that is normally around like that, I guess. Okay. He wanted to know about it. And I wasn't really willing to tell them anything. I already, at this point, I already know I'm booked, I'm done. It is what it is. I'm booked. I'm smoked.

I see all the pictures. They show me. You know, they show, they literally had like a couple of sheets of paper of all my clientele with all their picture. It was insane. It was like a yearbook with a couple of like small little pictures of all of them. And it was like so weird.

It was like, I know they didn't all look like mugshots. I was like, how do you have so many, all these pictures? Did you get them from a yearbook or something? Right. Very weird.

It was very weird. And so they wanted to know what they wanted to know about it. And I was like, at first, I tried the fake information. I tried. I don't know the guy's name. No, I gave him a name, but that's not a real name. Right. I give them fake information.

enough for them to to be content and in their minds put a couple ends together, I guess, but it's not really the truth at that time. It wasn't the truth. It was fabricated these names. And so when I go to my bond hearing, they bring the up that I was willing to cooperate and so I that made you know at all those charges they were willing to give me a signature bond to get me out that I told them they weren't interested in the marijuana and how much they wanted other stuff and oh yeah I can get you that I know a couple names you know give fake names or whatever it's like you guys have my phone I'm not really good you guys seize my phone I'm not really good you guys seize my phone. phone. I don't know the phone numbers off hand, all this stuff. But enough for them to play ball with me. Right. I know for them. So they'll be out on a signature bond. It was like a $500 signature

bond. Like literally the lowest bail for all those charges that's insane. Like my bail should have been through the roof. Another thing I should mention in Wisconsin, you will always get bail. You could there is no unless you have a federal case they can hold you without bail but in the state of Wisconsin if you have a P.O. hold you'll still get a bail but you can't go anywhere but even if you have 20 counts of murder they will give you a bail it might be 10 20 million but they will always give you a bail there is no no bail there's always a bail so that's definitely not the way it is uh in every state Yeah, I know. I know it's really, it's really weird.

It's really weird. They will always give you a bail no matter what. But, I mean, it's to an extent eventually, like this, this guy who, did you ever hear? I don't know if you heard about it. It was a big news thing, the Waukeshaw Parade Attack, Daryl Brooks. He drove through a parade and killed a bunch of people. It was on the deal. Darryl Brooks, yeah, Darryl Brooks. So, you know, he had a bond in Wisconsin, $5 million.

You know, they're going to give him a bond, but it's something obviously no one's going to pay. Right. But you will always get a bond. So, but it's, they're just going to make it so substantially absurd that no one's going to pay it. Right. So I, I get out and I'm, I'm having meetings with, I have a public defender at this time. Right. I eventually do get a paid attorney

But at this time I have a public defender And I'm not too concerned about all this stuff I'm not too concerned about all of it It is what it I'm still young I'm like it is what it is I'm meeting with the detectives Kind of Misleading them

And for a little bit trying to stall them off as long as I could until like I had to actually give real information having these meetings with them through text

stalling appointments with them like I'll do it next weekend I'll do it next weekend I'm like so what do you guys want just just really making the process long as long as long as I could and this was a bad idea

because another big thing that helped was COVID had hit at this time. So they don't want people in jail. They're getting like all. They don't, yeah, they don't want people in jail. And it's like they don't really, it's almost like they, for a while they stopped contacting me because they didn't, like they weren't even working through COVID kind of almost. Like they were, but I wasn't their main concern, and I was, like, willing at that time. I'm sure they had other things to take care of, you know, so COVID had hit. So it just gave me time out of nowhere.

And it gave me time. And so COVID had hit. I'm out on pretrial release, and I have to go in. I have to call every single day, see if I have to do a drug test. It's random. I call every single day. And it'll tell me if I have to come. or not. Right.

So I'm doing, I'm doing straight for a little bit, but COVID hit while I was trying to stall off the detect, just trying to figure out what I'm going to do. And so COVID had hit and they shut down the place for, like, they shut down the pre-trial place for a little bit, but they lied to people. I would call and ask people, are you guys still open? and somebody did answer the phone and they would say, yeah, we're still open. But whenever I had called, it was called the drug testing hotline. I had never gone more than, I would say the far this would be a week without a drug test.

At this point, it had been a month. So I knew that they were shut down. There's no way. It's been a month since I've had to come in for a drug test. and I'm calling every day. Okay. But it's also COVID. Right.

It's COVID. So I'm thinking maybe they're going only taking, they're only drug testing two people a day, one person per hour. They're going through their list randomly. I don't know what their procedure was, but it gets shut down for a little bit, not that long.

But it gets shut down for a little bit. And I think, oh, this is perfect they're shut down i can start using again and i don't even have to report and get away with it so i start using again for a little bit and before before you know it they're back open but it's still the middle of covid my cases are you know their status hearing six months apart like they're so far apart covid made my case like three four four years long i didn't get sent to since, like, it was like three, four years I was fighting in my case. COVID made my case so long.

Right. So, the drug testing place had opened. Now, I knew that I was going to fail this drug test. So I go in there and I figure it's better to fail it and show up than to not show up at all. at first this is what I thought which is true very very true and you know they they bring I fail it and um they they send a a letter to the judge about it and it gets brought up by my next hearing right since I did that I am violating the conditions of my bond because I am not staying sober and I don't know how they broken up my charges so weird

I don't know they put you know charges they opened up so many cases on me it was so weird like when my house got raided I probably got three different cases for possession of crack cocaine even though it all happened at once

but they got like they didn't do like duplicate charges on the same case. It was really weird how they did these charges. They kept opening up new cases. It was really weird. And before you know, I have 10 cases. I bail jump one time.

I bail jump 10 times because I'm out on bond on all these cases. Right. So I break the bond for all of them. So now I get 10 bail jumpings instead they rack them up like that. You get what I'm saying? Yeah. So they do that and now, you know, my bond is not that high. It's $2,500 because of, and it's all because of COVID and because I was willing to cooperate.

So they gave me a $2,500 bond. I pay it, I get out. now I do this one more time where I don't drop dirty I just go on go on the run and I didn't really go on the run I just didn't go to court I didn't go anywhere and it wasn't actively I just didn't I didn't want to be sick in jail but I just don't go I don't go to court boom they hit me with another now it's now it's 21 because I caught another case for the bail jumping so I don't have another open case so they're racking up these bail jumpings on me so quickly and I'm I'm just looking at them and they can give you three years

a piece for these and I'm like I can get like 160 all bail jumpings alone I'm like this is insane there's no way but I know they're not going to do that to me I know they're not going to do it to me but I'm like that's insane that they could just because of the way they stacked these charges but now I'm finding ways to cheat the system every time I have court I'll check into a rehab. Now, I have a viable reason to miss court. I'm missing drug test because I'm in rehab, though I'm in treatment. It's okay.

You know where I am at this moment. It is okay. But I'm checking out the next day and you don't know that. Right. Because I don't sign an agreement. I sign a, I have my lawyer tell them that I'm there, but I don't even tell my own, my own public defense. that I'm leaving and they don't tell her either so that they really think I'm in treatment

or in this time I'm kind of screwing with them kind of cheating I'm cheating the system I'm trying to find all the loopholes I can to to have freedom and not do a not do treatment and not not go to jail so they're not giving me the hell jumpings for those but they're they're not finding out what I'm doing, but I would still get caught a month later and they would just bring me in an arrest warrant. And then they just keep raising my bail, 5,000. And then I have another court date, 10,000. You know, I'd have, and I'd skip, or I'd have another court hearing. I'd skip it, get caught later. There is a 10,000, 20,000, 25,000. And Wisconsin, we don't, there isn't a 25, or there's no 10% rule. There's no bail bonds being are illegal here.

You pay 100% of your bail or you're not going anywhere. Oh, wow. I don't know that. That's not. If your bond is 10,000, they want 10,000. There's no 1,000 here. They want 10,000. The bail bondsmen are illegal here.

It's very weird. But I guess it's, I guess they try to factor that in that you're not going through a bail bondsman so they make your bail more reasonable, I guess, since there is no bail bond. I don't know. It's weird how it works. But if they would have gave me, eventually my bailed out to $25,000. I bailed out all these multiple times going in and out of county sitting for a month and letting my, going in and out and having my parents help bond me out.

My parents, towards the end, they were putting up their house, taking it, like, they were taking loans out to get me out. Like, they were really trying to help me. And towards the end, now COVID's kind of over. And now I have to, I give, I give them the information that they need. I cooperate. I give them the information they need. So I got them off my back. I give them the information.

It's not, it's not that interesting. I do a couple of deals. They, the technology is so insane. I mean, they had a Starbucks cup with a camera on it. Right. It was insane. Some of the stuff they were giving me. There is no wire anymore.

they give me another cell phone that's on record Bluetooth that's all crazy stuff so I

do end up cooperating I give them what they need and so now the judge is giving me

some sort of leniency in if I if he had given me a $25,000

bail at one point in time. I would have never been able to pay it. But since he gradually raised my bail, I was able to put $5,000 here, $2,000 there, $3,000 here, another $10,000 there. I was able to spin it. And I'm doing these like months, like a month at a time every time I don't go to court. And I haven't, my court since COVID is over. I'm missing court once a month. I'm literally getting out and jump and trying to and not go to court, and I have court in two weeks, and I'm getting arrested in three weeks. Like, I'm getting in and out of jail every two weeks, and I'm just binding out.

I'm sitting there for a month. I'm really doing stupid stuff. And surprisingly, the judge, the judge did tell me, he said, if this was your money, I would take it. But since it's your parents' money, I'm not going to take the bond money. But there were many times where he had, he wanted to take the bond money. Right. because I was I wasn't listening I was doing whatever I wanted I kind of had this cocky arrogance I'll bail out that I'll be fine I eventually I will come up with the money

eventually I will bail out there's they can't hold me they can't eventually somebody will bond me out I always knew that I didn't kill anyone my bales never going to be a million dollars but even if so I at this point in time and this is the kind of true. My parents probably would have sold their house for like, you know, I've done everything, took out loans as much as I had to try to post it, even like up in the numbers. They were really supporting me. Do your parents understand the concept of tough love? Now they do. Okay. At this time, no. Because they weren't helping you. They were not. No. Right. You should have sat in jail. Right. You would then you would have gotten

clean. Then you might have started saying, hey, this is serious. Yeah, yeah. But they didn't understand that. I always had money on my books. They always came and visited me, you know, two, three times a week. They went, their tough love was, you know, sitting in jail a week. That's tough love. Or, I mean, a month.

And then the post-me-ail is not a big deal. Oh, we'll wait a little bit. Make sure you're good and get me out. And I kind of. feel like because they're not they don't really need me but i do bring it because i'm always their interpreter i bring kind of value to them almost so i feel like that's a big thing that that played a part in them getting me out and what's really crazy is one time i for one time during this a visit since my parents are deaf i don't it's the monitor phone it's not a glass screen it's a

it's a monitor i don't i don't even pick up the phone because they're not talking we're just going to sign on the screen i'm going to see them like this how we are and they come and scoop me up in jail and throw me in the hole for um throwing up gang signs on a visit and i'm like this is absurd. I'm like out. They take my visits. I can't call home. This is insane. If I wanted to call home, I would have to like call someone else and then they would have to call an interpreter. And then the interpreter would call my mom and it would be like a five-way call. And then you could get in trouble for having a two-way call or three-way call. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're not you're not supposed to but it happens so sentencing is coming up right i've done i've given them

what they wanted sentencing is coming up and my judge used to be the the district attorney he's also been the attorney general he um i didn't think he was going to be because as a he was a d a for a long time and he was a very, very tough DA. He would smoke your boots. And I thought as a judge, he would. So towards the end, when I'm coming to sentencing, I hire a paid lawyer. I hire a paid lawyer because I felt like my public defender wasn't, it was, I feel like it was too much for her.

She wasn't, I feel like she didn't have enough time. She didn't really care about my case. I was kind of a lost cause at this. point so they um i hire an attorney and sentencing is starting to come around and you know i have all these open cases and obviously i'm taking what's called a global plea right you know what that is no so i've heard of global pleas been described different in other places but a global plea is we're going to wrap all 10 of your cases together together and we're going to drop a bunch of stuff but you got to plead guilty you have to plead guilty and we'll sentence you all at once

we'll get it you don't have to go fight all these different cases right it gets it all done at once and they drop obviously a lot of the bail jumpings but they do that to play because they they really use the bail jumpings as a bargaining token we'll drop the bail jumpings if you plead out to your original charges right and it's like

it's I guess that's fair but I mean like I said I cooperated and stuff and I helped them out and I think that played a huge part although I had done I'm going in and out of county I had done I don't know, maybe a year, not, not, I mean, not a year.

Maybe like six months in and out, just drug tests, checking in and out of rehab and going in and out of jail and just doing months here, getting out for a week, doing another month here, which is really stupid stuff. And so now it's time for sentencing, and I take a global plea. so this plea is just most insane deal you'll probably ever heard for everything he gave me a um um what was it it was like a month and a half in work release and then I had I had two years paper with a withheld sentence

and a withheld sentence is if I mess up on probation I have to go in front of the judge and he will resentence me to what you know he probably should of in the first place.

Right. It's a withheld sentence he can, if I mess up and I get revoked, I don't go do revocation time. I go see the judge and he resentences me. And so I, I take that deal and so I get, I get, I do my, my, my, the little time I had, which was like a month and a half, I do it. I get, I get a, about a month and a half later, I had, I've only been in there for a month and a half at work release. I had stacked up a little bit of money because it wasn't, it was, in Wisconsin, it's called Huber, but it's like actual, I am allowed to leave the jail, use my own vehicle and go to work at Denny's, go work at wherever. If I am employed anywhere, I can leave for up to 12 hours a day. Okay. So it's kind of like work release.

Right, but I can work anywhere. Right. Like there is no, it doesn't have to be affiliated with the jail. Like, I can work. As long as I'm employed, I can leave. And they charge me. I think it's $24 a day or 26, I forget. But I did that for a month and a half.

I had got a good, a decent job right off the back. because, you know, there's always people and there's jobs that are close and they work with a lot of humor people. They're used to it since they're close to the facility. So I got a job and saved up a little bit of money. So I got out and I stayed and I stopped for a little bit. And then one, I stopped for a month and I had a month.

I think it was too much. I had stopped for, I've been out for two months, and I had went to go use again. I was like, yeah, whatever, I'll do it. So I, this is the crazy, craziest thing. I go to use. I go meet my guy, I get my stuff. I'm on the way home. My phone is at 6%.

Now, I'm high. I want to listen to music. so I got to stop at the mall to charge my phone so I can have music on the rest of my ride home because it's at 5%. I didn't have a car charger at the time. So I knew that malls have like little charging stands. I don't have to pay anything. They have a little charging stands there. So I go there and the last thing I remember is getting out of my car.

but what supposedly happened and I'll tell this really quick before I was hungry but I didn't eat because I was like I'm going to get high I don't need to eat it'll be fine but I wasn't like starving or anything I could have got food but I was so rushed on getting high that I was like I'll eat later but as soon

as I get out the car I don't remember anything But supposedly I walk in the mall, go to the food court, do not charge my phone, jump over their counters, and try to steal their food and their money. And then I proceed to go in other stores and just rip off tags of stuff, not even trying to steal it, not putting it on, just ripping off tags. What were you on? Am I allowed to say that? I mean I was on I was

I was yeah go ahead well I was a mixture of Xanax and fentanyl okay so

wow that is what I was yeah it was so I didn't remember I don't and had you ever done that

before and had that problem I had never had that problem I wasn't I wasn't doing exams I think the Zans I think the Zans

I found out later when I dropped dirty that they were mixed in there. I didn't know that at first. I had never had this problem before. I had never thought about jumping over counters, robbing place. I never thought about that. I never thought about that. Any of that stupid stuff, but apparently I did it. And now I'm close to getting revoked because I don't get charged with robbery I get charged How are you close to being

I mean that to me that would be a clear violation Oh it's a violation But I'm close to being revoked It's a violation Right Since I didn't get charged with like a robbery Because I didn't leave

I got arrested by mall security And the police come and get me Now in Wisconsin Only in Milwaukee When you are on probation or parole and you get arrested, usually they send you straight to prison. They send you, they have a prison in Milwaukee. You don't go to county jail no more.

If you are on probation or we don't have parole anymore, it's called extended supervision. So you do 100% of your time here. Okay. So I get, I'm on probation. So I get sent to the, and since I live in Milwaukee, I, I get sent to this Milwaukee prison for a, for a while. My P.O. comes and sees me. And she's like, what the hell are you thinking? I've never, I never, I never, I never even met this lady yet.

I never even seen her in the 60 days. I, I, I, because I, at first, they gave me a P.O. in a different county, seeing them. And then I switched P.O.'s back to Milwaukee. And I had never seen this P.O. yet. And she, when her first time meeting me is obviously in the prison, she comes and sees me. It's called Milwaukee Secured Detention Facility. It's classified as a medium, but it's, you're in your cell, like, 22 hours a day. You get like an hour on the morning and an hour out at night.

That's it's really stupid. all right so it's terrible and they do a because COVID was going around so I'm doing a quarantine at this point

I'm quarantine so I have to sit 10 days not coming out of my room right so I do the quarantine and they don't revoke me they give me

a halfway house they give me a halfway house and they sent me all the way out to Stevens Point, which is just like by Winnebago. It's three hours from my home. And I'm like, why you send me so far? We have a couple, we have a decent amount of halfway houses in Milwaukee. But she sent me there, and most people who are in there that we're in there for, you know,

drugs and going to halfway houses, we're going to the close halfway houses. I was the only one who was getting shipped so far. And I was like, why? I don't understand. Maybe they're thinking the area has an, there's a problem. There's too many people there that you know that are willing to contribute to your issues. And that is what they end up telling me. Right.

That is why that happens. That's exactly. Probably pretty accurate. So go ahead. So they ship me to this. Now, I don't, I'm, I'm, now this halfway house is, in the end, it was really nice because this was the most relaxed halfway house you could imagine. The halfway house is in Milwaukee. They were doing quarantines, but since it's COVID, you're not leaving to go to work.

You know, you're staying in the house. You're not, you're not leaving. You might walk to this gas station with, with, um, a. staff member and get cigarettes maybe once in a while. But the halfway house and Stevens Point, they let you have your car up there. You can leave for hours at a time. They don't track you. You just tell them when you're leaving.

Tell them, you know, when he'll be back. Like, it's so relaxed. You can have your phone. Like, you can have everything at TV. You bring your own flat screen TV in your room. Like, it's the most relaxed halfway house you could possibly have. Okay. So, I'm in a halfway house, and I'm in the middle of nowhere, I know, I don't know anybody.

And I already know that I was so close to our vacation that I wasn't trying to mess it up. So I'm getting, I'm not trying to, I'm not trying to mess it up. But, and I don't know anybody out there, so I really can't mess it up. Like, there's no, I don't have any contacts out there. but like it was so relaxed and since most people lived maybe 30 minutes to an hour away when you have like visits you can leave with your parents and stuff they usually just drop you after you get back but since my parents lived three hours away they would let me leave for you know I leave at six in the morning drive back and I come back at midnight because I have to drive all the way

walking and come back. And I always thought about, oh, I could go down there and get stuff and then just not use it until after they drug test me. I never ended up doing that, though. But I always thought about it. But I'm at this halfway house. I was supposed to be here for three months. I was supposed to be here for three, four months, three, four months.

I'm supposed to be here. I've been here a month and a half. And this new guy comes in, who I get along with really well, turns out he is a, he's alcoholic. And since you can walk to the gas station, you know, you don't really have supervision on you. They breathalize you randomly and they drug test you randomly. But he, they didn't test for alcohol in your urine. They did breathalizers.

So what he always did was wait till like bedtime because they're typically from what I've even seen until I heard about what happened after the situation. They're not, the third shift person is not going to wake you up to drug test you or to or to breathalize you unless you're coming back from like sometimes maybe work and they're told to do it by the first. second shift staff so he would always wait till that time and i was like that's not a bad idea you know even they don't really and as long as like i don't leave you know even they don't really they don't really breathalize too often and as long as i don't leave i don't really give them a reason to breathalize me it is if you're not leaving they really don't drop you as much or breathalize you. So if I'm doing something stupid, I just don't, I just don't leave for a couple days, so I know I'm good. But I ended up drinking with this guy one night. And he starts,

he gets out of control. He gets out of control drinking. And he almost starts a fight with another roommate. So what happened? Earlier, we had already got our round of breathalizers. So we know we already got a breathalizers. We're good. So we started drinking earlier in the day. We already got a breathalyzer. You don't get breathalized twice in a day. It's very rarely. But breathalize you, he ends up making a scene, getting in a fight with one of his friend. And she decides to breathalize everyone again. And I'm like, oh, yeah, it's over with. So I hide in the bathroom for like 30 months. minutes. She's waiting outside the door. She leaves. I pretend I'm sleeping. And I go, I go to my bed. I pretend I'm sleeping. She actually pulls me and makes me blow into the breathalyzer. I blow into it. And she was like, well, why does it say this? And I was like, oh, I, I just, you see, I went to bed. I was, you use my mouthwash. And she was, she wasn't buying the story, but she had to write the statement down. She was like, why are you lying to me?

And I'm like, that's my statement. That is what happened. And it's mouthwash. I might have drank it, but it was mouthwash. So I get, me and him both get kicked out the halfway house. Now, since this happened, the whole place gets searched. And unbeknownst to me, they find, like, they find so much. they don't find so much stuff but the one thing that i got blamed for that wasn't mine they found

you know what a wizinator is yes so they found it's a fake uh fake male organ that allows you to pass a urine test yes and they had found one of these and since it wasn't it now it wasn't even in my room It had nothing to do with me, but they had thought that I ended up getting blamed for it. I had got blamed for it. I don't know if every, from what I heard different parts of stories from everybody, I called everybody. People, everyone said it was mine, even though it wasn't, whatever. I'm not coming back anyway. So I've been in jail.

I'm sitting in their jail. Now the halfway house is right here. The jail's literally across the street. So, like, when the cops come, they literally arrest you and just walk you across the street. But as I'm sitting in there waiting for her to see what my PO does, and it's been like a week, and they let him back into a halfway house. But they don't let me back in the halfway house. And I, I, it was because they had felt that I wasn't. Even though I had to stay sober until that point, I was always making jokes.

And the way I carried myself, very arrogant, didn't really care. I didn't participate that much. I really didn't. I wasn't even trying to go through the motions with them. I'm like, I'm here. I'm sober after 90 days. I am not. I'm not going through the motions.

so they didn't feel like a second chance was earned for me I guess I didn't deserve it but they let him go back so I have to get sent back to I have to get sent back to the Milwaukee prison now so because no I don't know what's happening I don't know if I'm getting revoked or if I don't know what's happening. All I know is I'm not going back to that halfway house and I'm going back to this prison of Milwaukee. So they, and they were telling me you might be here a month before Milwaukee comes and gets you there. They take forever and I'm like, oh my God. Thank God they didn't take that long because these cell blocks are still, there's six cells to a cell block and maybe three of them are being used. And there's literally a small TV, so small, and it's old, it's bar style, there's one table, the visits are terrible.

It was just so bad. It was so bad. And it was so weird. They had, because I got sent to the maximum security side, I don't know why, but they had a work release side, but it wasn't, they were, they would let anybody. stay over there they just wouldn't let them leave for work even like there was a guy who had got caught for a murder they sent him to the huber facility and i've sent over here in max but they didn't let him leave the huber facility they just let him stay in a minimum part of the jail where i had to stay in the max i think it's because i'm from a different county all this whatever

So they end up coming and picking me up a week after that week. So I've been there for two weeks. They come pick me up. So they come pick me up, take me back to Milwaukee. Now, I don't know what's going to happen. I'm going through the process. And I get called out. And I think they call them.

liaisons came and saw me a liaison came and saw me and said we're going to give you a 90 day a 90 day sanction and we want you to take this anger management program and try to spin it for yourself for drugs try to use the information they are teaching you for drugs and we'll knock 15 days off your sentence so you'll do 75 days on this sanction and I'm like all right now this my I mean I have done a month before I went to the halfway house I did two two months in the halfway house which is really freedom just not at home and now I had done the two weeks in this county jail but they didn't count those two weeks which is fine whatever they didn't count those two weeks but if they would have, I would have got out for my 21st birthday, but they didn't.

So now I send me to this anger management program, and I'm in the prison. I'm doing the anger management program, and it's not, I am telling there, there is no getting any more time off your sentence. You can only, you can make it worse by getting kicked out of the program. But there's also, like, if I were to get into a fight and get charged with a battery, that might not only get me kicked out of the program, I might now actually get revoked because I'm not in there on revocation yet. So it's a really weird, it's a really weird thing. So I do the program, and I tell the instructor just how it is, like,

I want to use, I don't care, like, that is what I want to do. And she was like, I, I appreciate you being so on. And everyone's telling me to shut up, even though they're not even in there for a door. They're like, be quiet. You can't tell you can't tell her that stuff. Like, you're going to get held in here forever. They're going to tell your P.O. And I was like, I'm like, I don't even give a fuck.

75 days after that, I'm gone. It is what it is. So I have this attitude every day. I am doing my 75 days. and I finally get released. And from that point, I get released October 28th of 2022. And my birthday is October 18th.

So I was mad if they would have counted it two weeks in the last county jail, it would have been open. You got nothing coming, bro. I mean, you can't expect one bit of lenient. I agree. I didn't have anything coming my way. And I knew that I had I had already, the whole time,

I had already skated my way through everything. Right. I got no punishment. But I had understood, and this came with just being in and out of jail for that, like, year period. And just being mature and being, like, older now, even though I'm not, I'm not old. And I had, just like a switch, I clicked in my head, like, this is clearly not working.

And I think being, having all those open cases more so pressured me to try to get in as much as I could before I was going to get sent away. Because I thought I was going to go to prison. So I felt like I could try to pressure me. And now after I got out, I like, I'm still on papers and stuff. I've been doing good. I have like a year left on papers. I've been out for a little over a year, about a year and a half. And now I'm doing good.

I'm working construction. And that's pretty much where we're at. That's where we're at right now. That is where we're at. I mean, where are you staying now? Your parents? Yeah, I stay with my parents because I have this. this plan that instead of taking out a mortgage, when my parents die, I have a brother and a sister,

the house is going to get split into between the three of us. I know my brother and sister are going to try to sell it and get money. So I'm trying to give, I'm giving my mom money to hold on to. So once she does, once that moment, God forbid, does come, there will be money and the council i can give it to my brother and says this is what the house that is worth this is what the house is worth take here's your portion of it and i'm going to stay here and live here now i don't have to take a mortgage i don't have to have debt i don't have to do that and so that's kind of what i'm doing right now but yes i am staying i'm saying i'm saying with my parents i'm working i'm doing a lot of work i'm working a lot of hours and i'm just and i mean i

talked to my P.O. the other day and she was like, man, I don't know how you did it. You were helpless. And I was like, yeah, I don't know. I just got old. I got older and not me, you know, I'm still such a kid. I just, I just got more mature.

I don't, I don't, I just knew that it wasn't. This isn't going to ever work. There is no way to spin this. And once you're on paper, it's like, I know if I do get, like I like when I did get arrested just for that position of narcotics when I was jumping over the counter at the mall like I couldn't bond out because I had a peel hold so I started realizing the severity of stuff and how quick because I had always been arrogant oh I can always bond out and all this I'd start to realize the severity of what they really can do what they want yeah you really don't have a say in it you have you have no say in it honestly how much can you put your parents through how much more can you put your parents through

right and my parents have been there the whole way they i put them through so much and they they you know they don't really know i try to explain to some they don't really know the they know a story but they don't know the full depth of how bad my addiction was but they know about oh i was selling drugs for a little bit they don't they don't really not that they don't care but and their mind he's in jail like as long as it doesn't say like murder like they i'm sure they still don't haven't even figured out that like i was charged with acid but it like they just know that i'm in jail and i'm not doing their right thing which is all that they need to know they were going to the hearings and stuff they were showing up it's not that they

didn't care but it wasn't i don't think they don't they don't under my parents have never been in trouble they've never done a drug in their life so they don't fully understand it they don't understand the legal system they don't understand how drugs were they don't really understand it like that so i was always able to swindle as i call it spin a story so it makes sense to my mom is why i did what i did or it was a friend's stuff or i'm sorry i didn't know what i was doing i'm still a kid and she would always come too much my rescue. Right.

And so eventually, at the halfway house, that was like the breaking point for her. She was like, after I got kicked out of a halfway house, she said, whatever happens after this, when you get released, whether you get revoked or not, when you get released from this point on, I am not getting you out. I am not putting money on your books. I am not going to do all that. And so she had always said that before, but I could tell like the sincerity of this time.

Like she really actually meant that she had always telling you, you go back on the bailing you out. And she always did eventually. So that's kind of the whole story. All right. And now you're working construction. When you say construction, you're doing snow plow. Is that construction?

I'm doing plowing right now because it's the winter, but it's not, I guess it's hardscaping and landscaping. Like I build patios, retaining walls, stuff like that, walkways, concrete, stuff like that. It's like a hardscaper, I would call it. But, and then during the winter, like, I plow the medical college down here. I plow the top of the parking garage so it doesn't collapse. But since the machine broke, there's a lot up there right now, and it might not. And I can't, I have nowhere to put it. So they haven't called me in yet.

So I don't know. It's supposed to be reinforced, but, I mean, you've seen on the news that parking structures do collapse. And there, like, there's the, there was nowhere left for us to put the snow. There's like a burner we dump it into to melt that we don't dump it off the side. Because it's so there are the other parking structures they do, but they can only dump from like two in the morning and six in the morning. But we have a melter that you take here. We use a plow and just plow it in there. But we had already, we plow at first.

We don't put it straight in the melter. We put it to the sides. and then we start taking it to the melter all at once once everything's been plowed. But the milter didn't turn on yesterday. So I don't know what's going to happen. But I guess we'll see what happens when they call me. But it's pretty bad up there. I'm talking I think like the whole outside, like there's a four foot.

Like it's like a four foot with four foot tall. and like all the way lined up around the whole parking garage at every like on the outside and the inside of it at every little edge like there is and it's heavy snow it's bad but it's supposed to be reinforced for it so I guess we'll see what happens but well and in the winter I plow but in the in the summer and then fall and even in the winter when it's not snowing I'll do patios and stuff and walls concrete whatever I can listen bro i mean i'm glad you're doing better now you seem like you're in a better you know head space right better frame of mind yeah i i i understand that you you can't just skate through everything like you eventually i have a saying uh eventually you will fuck around and find out They will. They will. They can and they will. They will show you. All right. Well, hold on one second. I appreciate you coming on and telling me the story. Because you're, anyway, I'll hold on a second.

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