Matthew Cox | Inside True Crime Podcast - I Almost Died... FLORIDA MAN DATING STORY

Episode Date: January 9, 2024

I Almost Died... FLORIDA MAN DATING STORY ...

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Starting point is 00:00:26 Quiet night in on Friday. It's good to have a routine, and it's good for your eyes too, because with regular comprehensive eye exams at Specsavers, you'll know just how healthy they are. Visit Spexavers.cavers.cai to book your next eye exam, eye exams provided by independent optometrists. I watch him walk all the way to the car. He opens the car door, he leans in the car, he then comes back out of the car, he's holding an AR-15. Hey, this is Matt Cox, and I'm going to be doing, we're going to be doing a podcast with Juan Sanchez. And the, it's basically, basically the podcast is about one. It's kind of about my, my dating life, but really it's about one specific chick that I dated recently. And it's basically, I'm letting the viewer know in this podcast what it's like to date in Florida. I think I think if you don't mind me interrupting you All right It's a combination of things
Starting point is 00:01:34 It's like what is like to be dating in Florida And what is like to be an ex-convict Dating in Florida Because I think there is a level of Desperation perhaps Or me? No no no I'm on that group too
Starting point is 00:01:48 I don't know I mean But honestly in this specific event Like this is a Florida thing Yeah this had nothing to do with me being Like she this chick knew I would I had gone to prison. That's how I met her through a mutual friend that had also got in prison. So I just want to go ahead. I mean, I know bits and
Starting point is 00:02:02 pieces of the story. Right, right. But I don't know if you've heard the whole story and how it unraveled and just how wrong it goes. Like this is like it goes so bad and yet it starts so good. But coming soon, one day in the near future, we will have Matt telling us a story about
Starting point is 00:02:18 his dating life that actually went right. Yeah, we're assuming. It's coming. Yeah. Well, maybe. You have to get all the nose out of the way like in sales. Right. All right. So here's what's, all right. So let me just jump right into it. So I'm going to say I dated this chick, Jess, for a couple years. We broke up. And I say we like I had something to do with it technically. She ditched me. So she broke out with me. And I went about a month without dating anybody. I was just so fucked up, so heartbroken and just upset about the whole thing. So, but eventually I start dating. I went on a few dates. So I dated this one chick. It was a okay. I dated another girl. It was okay. Date another girl. But I ended up going on a date with this one girl. Let me tell you how it happened. I went on Facebook has a dating app. I've heard about it. It's good. It's free. And it's like, and so a lot of times you will, when you're going
Starting point is 00:03:13 through the app, you'll realize, hey, this girl's on this app. She's gorgeous. And we have three mutual friends. I don't understand there's a little lower when you're going to a free app versus like no, no. This is just as good. This is better than. match. It's better than Bumble. It's better than all those. Okay. So I go on the app. So, you know, I feel it. I feel all the stuff. And I've got a nice little, you know, nice little, um, profile and everything. Of course you do. I'm scrolling through, right? I've got, you know. Are you Gary Sullivan in the profile? That's funny. So I'm Matt Cox. I'm scroll. I'm basically, I'm, it's basically more, more about me being an artist. Like I don't say right off the bat, hey, here's what's going
Starting point is 00:03:52 on. But if they, but they can easily go to my, they can easily go to my profile and figure that out. It's mostly about just being an artist, right? So, you know, because I paint painting. And so it's basically about being an artist. And that's who I am, and I'm newly single and looking and interested in a long-term relationship. And it tells everything about you. So I was scrolling one day and I see this one girl and I thought, I like this chick. Like this chick, she's, listen, bone thin.
Starting point is 00:04:22 I mean, like, what was it, heroin sheik, right? Like you've heard the term heroin. Yes, it's a very vogue. Yeah, super thin. She's got, she's got a frohawk. You know, that it's like a mohawk, but you still have hair on the side of your head. Okay. Got a frohawk.
Starting point is 00:04:35 She's got tattoos on her arms and her shoulder. I mean, look, like super strikingly sexy and gutsy. Like a chick that's 38 years old that has a mohawk or a rohawk. And that's the thing right now. That's the look that, I don't know if it's a look. I know it's what I like. And most people would say, oh, no, bro, this isn't, I'll explain. So Colby, do me a favor.
Starting point is 00:04:55 here's what we're going to do uh so her name i'm not going to give her last name uh it's um alissa and this is alissa's picture which we're going to colby's going to throw up right here over one we're going to throw up a couple pictures we're going to wait a second so colby's going to have them kind of come up and they're going to fade we're going to do another one and i think i like three i got like two or three no i got like three or four good shots of her so people are going to look at it and most people are going to say bro like that's not your type you don't understand, that is my type. And I don't know about the Frohawk, but the rest of her, thin, tattoos, wild, wild,
Starting point is 00:05:32 rugged, free spirit. Right. The problem is, those chicks, basically, when they meet me, they're like, you're not my type. Like, you're, they look at me like I'm a business guy or something. It's like, that's not what I am at all. Like, that's, for some reason, I just come off that. Come off arrogant and cocky and entitled in middle class. I know, I know, I know.
Starting point is 00:05:49 No, I know. I don't believe. I know you don't see that. These ladies have to be, you know, deeper than. that so but you know what gets someone by that typically once they realize oh he's been to prison he was on the run he was there like oh okay he's he's a little bit wild too and then it it sinks in there like all right we're good so this chick i liked her i saw you know that there's a huge issue with that that i have there's mental problems i mean there's a mental there's some issues
Starting point is 00:06:15 i think okay this dude is an ex-convict and this is he's i'm gonna take him home to my parents i get that i get that but so i'm going through the app i see her i look through her thing and I think, hey, she doesn't have a lot on the app. It's very brief. But I look, I think she's sexy. And you can put like her just like on, boom, I like her. And then they have to like you back for you to communicate. Well, you can send them a message or something.
Starting point is 00:06:36 But I went, you know, like, and I sat there. And then like, I think I want to say, I'm going to say a day went by. But whatever. Some time went by, maybe a day and I went back to her app. Or, no, that was it. I noticed that we had a friend in common. When she didn't get back to me or however it works, I went to my buddy, his name is Vesser,
Starting point is 00:06:54 and I was locked up with Vesser. I was in Coleman with Vesser. So I go to Vesser, and I hit him up, and I talked to him every once in a while, and I hit up Vesser, and I said, hey, bro, I said, do you know this girl, Alyssa? And he said, yeah, I know her. He said, I've known her since she was 14 years old.
Starting point is 00:07:12 She used to date the bass player or the, no, no, the bass player in my band. And I was like, bro, I want to meet her. It says, because I went on her profile, says she's a widow. I said, she says she's a widow, says she's single. I want to date her. I mean, I, and he goes, ah, bro, I don't know. Like, I don't think she's your type. I went, no, no, she is my type.
Starting point is 00:07:31 I said, you don't know what my type is. Okay, that's my type. And he went, I don't think she's dating, bro. And I went, why? And he said, well, she's got some issues she's going through. Like, there's stuff going on. I don't want to say, there's stuff going on with her. And I mean, he's being polite.
Starting point is 00:07:46 I get it. And, you know, he doesn't want to put her business out there. That's fine. And he said, and I said, bro, do me a favor. just tell her that I'm interested. I liked her on the profile. I mean, I liked her profile. I liked her on Facebook dating, the dating app.
Starting point is 00:08:00 I said, just, but I didn't get a response or whatever the reason was. I said, so do just do me favor. And he goes, I mean, I'll ask her, bro. I'll ask her. So he contacts her. And he says, he said for you to email or to contact her through Messenger. He said she's interested. Facebook Messenger.
Starting point is 00:08:18 Facebook Messenger. Great. I go straight there. Boom. Hey, I'm Vesters. friend. I know he talked to you. I want to go out. I'm going to take you out on a date. Like, I'm very direct. Not pussyfoot around. We're not waiting four weeks for me to say, hey, maybe we should. I did 13 years. If I'm going to get some is happening today. Let's do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not what I said. I didn't say get some. I didn't say I'm looking
Starting point is 00:08:37 for a long-term relationship with a nice, a chick. I don't mind if she's got some baggage. Like you tried church? Church? That's the problem with Christian, with good Christians. They don't put out? you can't do this the whole time okay you really can't is this okay but the problem with good Christians is they don't realize that you know like like that like you know it's supposed to be about being all encompassing and being forgiveness and everything
Starting point is 00:09:03 of the truth is most Christians use Christianity to exclude so do you think you will not be accepted in a family in a wholesome Christian family that's what I think and I noticed that a lot of people are like was he good Christian is it so instead of saying hey let's bring him into the fold they try and exclude Oh, he was locked up. Oh, that's horrible. Well, what are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:09:22 Like, what do you think that they... Jesus was a criminal. They hung him. Well, I think you're talking about another Jesus. Maybe Jesus Martinez. But now they nailed this dude. He listened, he broke the law. They nailed them onto a cross.
Starting point is 00:09:34 You are onto something. I mean... I'm saying. I'm just saying. The Apostle Paul, he wrote most of the Bible in prison. I think... Yeah, he was in prison. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:09:41 Of course. But people, they don't think that they're always... Whatever. That's another podcast. That's in the podcast. So here's what happens. So I send her, I send Alyssa a thing, hey, I know Vesser, I'd like to take you out. She comes back and she's like, well, okay, I don't usually date.
Starting point is 00:10:01 And I was like, well, I mean, I would like to take you out. I mean, I know. I know there's some issues. Like I'd like to meet you. I want to meet you. Let's hook up. Let's meet. The worst that happens is you meet an interesting person, a friend of a friend.
Starting point is 00:10:14 You have dinner with a friend of a friend. There's nothing wrong with that. Let's do this. she says okay so then we schedule a time to go to eat a couple days later i we meet i she says i'll meet you halfway i said no no i'll drive to you because i was trying to drive to them the first time you know what i'm saying at least the first time to let because if it goes wrong i don't want them to feel like man i drove 45 minutes i met this guy he's a complete douchebag i'm not interested in him and you know so i always pay for dinner i always pay for dinner anyway like i never let
Starting point is 00:10:41 do make the drive worth i mean i drop 45 minutes to me this doucheback but at least you get a free meal out of it. You get a free meal and you didn't dry. No, you didn't drive 45 minutes. So you don't dry 45 minutes. Okay. So you meet her on her neck of the woods. I meet you near close to you. Okay. And I pay for that. Pay for the dinner. Okay. Sounds like a deal. Not opening your door and doing all that crap because then they expect it forever. And you know, it's just, it's just silly. Not don't he's doing that. So I go and I meet her. And I meet her. You know, we meet outside. She pulls up. She's like, hey, I'm here. We're texting. We're talking on the phone. Hey, okay, cool. I meet her. We, you know, meet it Outback. We walk into Outback. And listen as soon as i see her i said i was like this chick's awesome super thin and i'm like like like
Starting point is 00:11:25 i'm like wow like she's even thinner like but but she's but gorgeous blue eyes like you can't imagine good stride good walk i mean amazing like like she looked like she should be dating somebody who who who plays in a rock band in a rock band she did so we go we meet we sit out she's like hey what's up give a nice little hug by the way you like kick ass body fake tits well she's got the fuck it like i'm she looked honestly she i thought all the important things i thought this chick has to have been a stripper at one point has to have been okay but she was she's never was so we go we sit down we order dinner we're sitting there and she sits down and she's like so um she was yeah so i don't know where to start she's like like i was i um she was born and
Starting point is 00:12:13 she tells me like i forget where she was born like i was born in michigan you were paying close attention. Can you do this the whole time? So she tells me she was born wherever it was. I don't know. I was born here and then this and I went to high school here. I actually, that's where I met Visser and I used to date his, you know, the guitar play department.
Starting point is 00:12:31 She was maybe for maybe six months or something. She was way older to me. She was way older than me. She was actually older than. She was, anyway, she starts telling me like her story like this and that and then this happened and that happened. Then I met my husband. She said, and you know, and we was great.
Starting point is 00:12:44 It was a great marriage. It was great marriage. Like she just starts telling me. She's like, we have three kids. We have, so she's got kids. Yeah, she's got three. Okay. And one of them's already, she's like my oldest daughter.
Starting point is 00:12:54 She just got her own apartment. She lives down the street, not too far, maybe 10 minutes away. She starts telling me about the daughter moved out. So it's really just the two kids left. And she starts telling me about herself. But it's weird. It's like I've never had anybody do this. Like it's the oddest thing, the way she's doing it.
Starting point is 00:13:10 And I finally I look at her and I go, full disclosure, full disclosure, like insane disclosure. And I look at her and I go, I said, Alyssa, I have a question. She goes, what, I go, what, what's happening here? And she goes, what do you think this is? What do you think is? I go, what's happening? She goes, I go, what did Visser tell you?
Starting point is 00:13:27 And she said, he told me that you, he said, he told me that you write books and you wanted to, you wanted to meet me and wanted to take me to dinner. And, you know, so, I mean, she was, I kind of assumed. Oh, my God. She thought you were going to write a book about her. She was like, I kind of thought you wanted to know my story. and I went no I said do you have a story she says people say I have a story she says I do have kind of an interesting story and I went okay I said she says why what do you think it is I go
Starting point is 00:13:55 this is a date and she goes oh she'll see I from your text that I kind of got that impression I kind of thought it was a date but then I really thought well I looked you up she said I saw you've written a bunch of books and I said did this her tell you how how you we know each other She was, I mean, I assume you were in prison with him, right? I went, yeah. She said, I saw that. I saw that. I saw that you written a bunch of books and you've got a bunch of podcasts.
Starting point is 00:14:20 Like you're, you know, she's like, you've got a lot. Like, there's a lot on you online. And I was like, right. She was, she was, okay, so this isn't about, this isn't about my story. I said, no. I said, this is like a date. And she went, oh, Matt, she said, did he tell you that I don't date? I go, well, you were on the dating app.
Starting point is 00:14:39 Yeah. And she went, no. Oh, she said, my daughter put me on that dating app. Like, my daughter wants me to date, and she screenshot it. She goes, she put some of my pictures on. She said, but I don't, I haven't checked that app in six months. She was, she put it on maybe six or eight months ago. She was like, I told her I don't want to date.
Starting point is 00:14:58 And I went, why? And this wasn't a red flag for you? You weren't like something's weird with this girl? Yeah, but it's happening in real time. Like, it's happening right then. So I go, why? And she goes, Visser didn't tell you anything.
Starting point is 00:15:12 She goes, oh, wow, he didn't do you any favors. And I went, why? Why don't you date? Is it because your husband died? Because I saw that it says on your profile says you're a widower. And she went, no, Matt. She said, I have cancer. She said, I came down with it two years ago.
Starting point is 00:15:30 And she said, it's, and she named the cancer. And I can't remember what the name was. It was like some long flux of globular or such and such, whatever. And I went, okay. And she said, so most people live between, she said, three to five years with it. She said, it's been almost two years since I came down with it. And she said, my, she said, and look, she had my husband. And she told me, and I went, and I was like, she said, I don't, she said, so, you know, I've got cancer.
Starting point is 00:15:55 I don't want, because I don't want to date anybody because. So basically, she said, I'm not looking for a long-term relationship. Such a dick. What a dick. Right? Is it wrong? We need to mic up Colby so he can back me up. By the way, you want to know how sensitive Colby is?
Starting point is 00:16:12 Right now he's tearing out. He's crying right now. Bro, your wife doesn't watch these things, right? Okay, good. Thank God. Because she'll be like, oh, God, he's a dick. You're never going back to that house. My husband's a dick just like this guy won.
Starting point is 00:16:22 Yeah, no. So, yeah, so what is up happening is, is I was like, oh, wow. She said, I'm sorry, I just don't. She said, I mean, she was, for me to get involved with somebody, she was to watch me deteriorate. And she said, you know, I just, I just can't. I mean, that's kind of like a noble. It is, but keep mind, too. She said, I did actually, was dating somebody.
Starting point is 00:16:43 She said, but after it ended, she said, I decided that that's, I'm just not doing it again. I'm not going to do this to somebody. I was like, well, I said, oh, okay, so you did date? And she goes, yeah, I said, well, tell me your story. Tell me the story. I said, well, you were telling me the story. Tell me the story. And she said, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:16:57 I said, no, no, we'll have dinner and it's fine. We'll have dinner and we'll leave and we're good. I said, tell me the story. I said, something might spark my interest. She goes, I said, because honestly, I said, I only write about criminals. said you don't seem to have a crime story and she has no and I said okay
Starting point is 00:17:10 she had a better husband fucking hey bro dude so anyway she says she tells me about the husband and what happened was she's like two years ago the husband basically started using drugs okay so she is he starts using drugs
Starting point is 00:17:28 and he's disappearing for days at a time and he's acting erratic and she said so we you know we argue we try and get him off the drugs we do this we do that she's but he's in complete she was even when he would get off the drugs and he was sober she said he was a completely different person she said i don't know what happened it was meth it was meth and she said he was completely different person she's just his his entire everything about him just changed suddenly she says and this is a guy that she'd been married to for i want to say
Starting point is 00:17:53 16 years at that point so this is the the father of the three kids all three kids okay so if it pretty sure it's three kids so she said so for 16 years she was married to this guy and then suddenly boom drug use and then she said completely changed she said at one point he that she had to call the police and she said so i i kicked him out of the house and she said he kept seeing my our kids no big deal you know trying to make the best of it uh and then she said she said so i started dating i started dating another guy she starts dating this other guy and um so his name is chris uh so she starts dating chris and so she's dating chris and she's like you know and it's okay but it very quickly, she has, it deteriorates, it becomes abusive.
Starting point is 00:18:37 She said, that goes on about six months to a year. She dates him six months to a year. She said it's so bad, and she's so not physically abusive, but mentally abusive. She says, he just calls me names, talks down to me, just horrible guy. And she said, so he's so bad that at some point, she says, I actually get a restraining order against him. And I was like, okay, and I know that's true because I only think that's true. One, she said it, and two, Vesser also told me she has a restraining order. Okay.
Starting point is 00:19:00 This comes up later. So, okay, fine. so I'm sitting there and you know and she tells me the whole story and then one day she said one day about six or eight months ago because all this happened in the last month so six or eight months ago she goes so six or eight months ago my husband she gets the phone call where her husband drove his car off the road or swerved off the road whatever it was off the road hit a bunch of trees flip the car hit a bunch of trees ends up in the hospital six days later or seven days later he dies he's on a ventilator they eventually he's brain dead they pull the plug When they, when they, she's recently widowed about eight months ago. Okay. So when they do the brain scan of him, they've turned out he had early stages of, of a dementia, which is probably why he was doing the meth. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:49 You know what I'm saying? So he's self-medicating. So that's why he came on. So suddenly she's like, never, no drug used prior to that. And that was a change of personalities and all this show. Everything. So it all makes sense. So I'm listening to her and I'm like, okay, wow, okay, I get that.
Starting point is 00:20:00 I get that. But then the boyfriend. friend, the ex-boyfriend, she's like, I'm like, so what about the ex? Chris. I go, well, what's up with the ex-boyfriend? And she says, well, he, um, she says, I haven't seen him. She was, he comes around. He follows me. Like, I see him every once in a while. And I, she says, she was, she's, I don't. I mean, you know bits and pieces, so people don't. So, so she was, I see, she was, he was, he was in a commercial. She was, basically, she said, he stalks me. She was, he stalking me all the time. He follows me. He shows up places on
Starting point is 00:20:28 at. He tries to talk to me. She was about, it's over. Like, it's been over for six months. six or eight months. She was, it's just over. And so I got the restraining order. She was, I just, I don't know. She's, I'm hoping he'll just go away eventually. And I'm like, okay, I get that. So anyway, so then she tells me about her kids and, you know,
Starting point is 00:20:44 this one and this. I'm not going to say the kid's names. This one and this one and my daughter and that. I'm like, well, why don't you date? And she's like, you know, I just feel like if, what if something happens about me? So she's got a whole thing. And I get it. So whatever.
Starting point is 00:20:56 We talk and we talk. She talked, like I could tell this is somebody who needed to talk. like I remember when we got to after 45 minutes of her telling her story she turns to me she's like so what are you doing like I see that there's stuff and I go I mean I don't really listen I do a podcast I give her a real short five or 10 minute readers digest version of what I'm doing
Starting point is 00:21:15 you know because at this point we're done with dinner it's been over an hour and a half at this point because it took 15 minutes to get to the point where I figured out it was cancer then at 45 minutes after she's been talking for over an hour I talk for 50 it's now 15 minutes it's now been an hour and 15 or 20 minutes that we've eaten
Starting point is 00:21:31 the check comes. She goes, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I got it, no, no, I got it. I pay. I said, okay, I said, all right, well, listen, you know. I said, I've had a great time. I was, I'm glad I, and she goes, I'm so sorry, you drove an hour and a half. I said, no, no, no, this was worth a drive. I said, meeting you was worth the drive.
Starting point is 00:21:46 I said, you seem like a super interesting person. I said, I'm so sorry about the cancer. And I said, I, you know, I'm sorry. I said, I don't know what to say. There's nothing good for me to say here. And she goes, no, I get it. I get it. she sat there and she said um she says i'm having a good time and i went okay and she went
Starting point is 00:22:04 do you want to go do something and i was like um sure sure i said what what is what do you want to do and she went um do you like pool i said she was can you play pool i said i can't play pool i do not play pool well i said she was you were locked up for almost 13 years she goes and you don't play pool well i said i spent most of my time in the library i'm a writer yeah Exactly. I rode my way through prison. Right. So.
Starting point is 00:22:30 Like Hamilton. So I really, at this point, I feel like I wish I'd called Josh and had him show up. So anyway, so she says, okay, she goes, okay, well, I said, but hey, I'm willing to play. I would love to play pool with you. Let's go play pool. Because, you know, look, she's got cancer. Like, I feel bad. Was she drinking?
Starting point is 00:22:53 You know, I want to say she did have some, some, she had like a drink or something. okay you know and what scene was so funny remember I told you how thin she was like I was like that's what I'm asking you I mean right well I remember looking at her thinking as soon as she said cancer I remember thinking oh wow she's not like skinny because it's stylish she's sick like but listen but beautiful beautiful chick um anyway I I said absolutely let's go play pool like listen this chick wants to do anything she says I want to play pop pop pop golf of course I don't know why we're not already there go go golf whatever bowling go yo bring a whatever let's go yeah like I'm doing whatever you want to do.
Starting point is 00:23:27 Yeah. So it's not going to make a wish. Right. So what fucking dick? Anyway. Anyway. Well, you know, let me tell you something. He's thinking about starting a YouTube channel.
Starting point is 00:23:40 I am suggesting don't subscribe. Listen. What kind of sick fuck? This is a problem. I'm saying what he's thinking. No, I'm not thinking it. Because I thought she was sexy and I thought she was super cool and I liked her. So anyway, look, listen.
Starting point is 00:23:55 So I dated like, so like Jess, right? Like I literally can't stop thinking about Jess. And I'll go on dates with other women. Comparing her. She's your point. I think she's like your point of comparison. Absolutely. Which is horrible because I see Jess in a way that that's, I have her on a pedestal.
Starting point is 00:24:11 And so I'm sitting there, I'll go on a date with another girl. And the whole time she's talking. Would this be the replacement for Jess? Yeah, I am the whole time. And I'm thinking to myself like, I'm even, sometimes I'm sitting there thinking, Jess would never say that. Jeff would never do that. That's horrible.
Starting point is 00:24:24 I know it is horrible. I know it's fucking. But listen, it had been only a month. It'd been a month. I dated Jess for two years. It's been a month. So what happens is, is, but when I was with Alyssa, I didn't do that. The whole time I was just engrossed in talking with her.
Starting point is 00:24:38 Do you think she has similarities to Jess? I mean, she does, look. Like the way she talked or the things she said or? Somewhat and super thin and she was shy and really just genuine, like a genuine person. Like when she says something, I just automatically believe it. Like, it didn't seem, nothing she said. Nothing fake. She wasn't fake.
Starting point is 00:24:58 She wasn't. She wasn't. Like, she was just who she was. Like, hey, I'm showing up in cowboy boots and blue jeans and you'll deal with it. And she came clean from the beginning, which is good. Absolutely. It wasn't anything like, let's build up. And then I'm going to tell you why we're not going to work out.
Starting point is 00:25:13 Right, right. So you're going to appreciate that. And that's, listen, hey, and the whole thing, like showing up in cowboys, blue jeans and a t-shirt and just being like, this is how it is. I got a little bit of makeup on. You'll deal with it. Oh, you don't like it. Okay, well, kick on it. And that's just, yes.
Starting point is 00:25:24 She could give a crap. Same thing with this chick. This chick was like, this is the kind of chick that I knew. She'll wrestle with you. She'll punch you in the arm if you give her a hard time. If you say, if you say something wrong, she'll be like, what did you just say? You know, she's not going to. Yeah, she's not a pushover.
Starting point is 00:25:37 Right. And I can't have a pushover because I will absolutely, if I date a chick who's a pushover, I will absolutely dominate the entire relationship. And I know that, even though I'm okay with it, I know it's a mistake. In the end, I need a chick that pushes back. That Alyssa would push back. Jess pushed back. That's the only way you get anywhere with me.
Starting point is 00:25:55 So I sat there. So I thought, hey, I like this chick. I'm going to go play pool with her. Cool. I still don't think anything. She doesn't date. I get it. You want to spend the rest of your time with your kids.
Starting point is 00:26:04 I get that. You made your mind up. So we go to the pool place. I remember we were walking in the pool place. And I said, oh, man, I said, this looks like a little bit rougher of an establishment that I'm used to. I said, I don't know that I'm, I said, but I said, I'm okay. And she goes, you're okay?
Starting point is 00:26:20 I said, a little bit rougher of an established than I'm used to. And she looked at me, she goes, well, you're with me. She says, you'll be all right. And I just thought, so, so cute, you know. And I was like, I said, all right. I said, she is, are you feel comfortable? I said, no, no, we're good, we're good. We go in there.
Starting point is 00:26:34 She knows everybody. And everybody there, by the way, all of them were like, I haven't seen you. And what, it's been a year or it's been six months. So what she had told me was this. I hardly ever leave my house. I spend all my time with my kids. I drive them everywhere they want to go. I do nothing but I basically at this point, I'm staying.
Starting point is 00:26:51 She's not working. She's just not working. I'm just hanging out for my kids. How's she making money? I mean, one, I'm sure if she's probably, I don't know this, but I'm assuming SSD, Social Security Disability. Okay. I'm assuming she's got Medicare or Medicare or all the, all the medical stuff. And then obviously if you have cancer, you get certain benefits.
Starting point is 00:27:07 So I am assuming that a lot of that is, you know, plus I'm assuming also she's got maybe the house is paid for. I don't know. Okay. I don't really know. It's none of my business. I didn't ask. She's surviving somehow. And so we go in, but it's obvious that everybody there,
Starting point is 00:27:22 knows her. But they're also, when they hug her and say hi to her, they're also all saying, I haven't seen you in a year. I haven't seen you in, it's been at least six months. It's been, where have you been? Where have you been? So I realize everything she's saying is right. She's no going out. She doesn't go out, right? We play pool. She gets a drink or two. We play pool. She beats me three games in a row like it's nothing. At one point, she stopped. She actually misses a couple shots. And I look at her, I go, what are you doing? And she goes, what? And I went, you I could have made that shot and she goes I go are you losing on purpose she goes I don't want to take your man card from you I know it's important for guys to win and and I go no no no don't do that
Starting point is 00:28:04 I said beat me like you'd beat anybody and she goes are you sure I go yes and beat the hell out of me three games in a row she's like she's like a shark so but listen we sit down at the table we talk shit we laugh we have fun we flirt with each other a little bit then when it's it's now it's like 12 o'clock. And she's like, you have an hour and a half drive. And she goes, I can't keep you out any longer. I went, she goes, I mean, I could stay out with you all night. And I went, I said, no, I said, yeah, I'm going to get going.
Starting point is 00:28:31 So I get going. We walk outside. And when we're standing outside, she turns to me and she says, I know exactly how she said it, but she went, can I tell you something? I went, yeah, what? She goes, I had a great time. I went, I had a great time too. And she said, I wish this had been a date.
Starting point is 00:28:49 And I just remember thinking, wow. I had this looked at her, I went, well, it was a date. This is heading to somewhere, like, really bad, isn't it? So I said, listen, this is a great story. It is a good story. No, it's a good story. And I said, I said, you know what?
Starting point is 00:29:02 I said, Alyssa, I go, it was a date. I said, I know you don't date. I'm going to let you think about it. I said, I'm not going to move in for a kiss. I'm not going to push the envelope. And she goes, okay. I said, I'm going to, I'm going to leave. And normally I always fucking, I'm always going to go in for the kiss, always.
Starting point is 00:29:17 Because it separates right then. Because what you don't want to do is get. to the second or third date and then find out, oh, I just want to be friends. Okay, right. So I just dated you. Did I just pay for three dinners? You want to crush that friend zone from the get-go? Smash it. Get it out of the way. But I'd already put it out of my mind. And at that point. But when she said that, I was like, wow. So I said, look, you know what? I know you have an issue. I'm not going to push the envelope. She goes, okay. She says, that's good. And I said, so what I'm going to do is I'm going to go home. And tomorrow, I said, I'm going to call you up and I'm
Starting point is 00:29:44 going to ask you out on another date. I said, is that cool? And she looked at me and she went, you know this this ends bad right she said man i'm let's be honest she said i'm i'm gonna i'm gonna die she said i mean i'm i'm i'm i'm okay now she's i'm healthy i'm healthy right now but she said i don't know when things are we going to progress she said it may be two years she says it may be two months she said i don't know she said and i said well look well we have to get into all that right now so the bottom line is i said let's just go on a few dates i said and We'll see what happens. And I said, she was like, I just don't know.
Starting point is 00:30:23 And I went, I'm leaving. I'm going to call you tomorrow. Get in the car. Listen, we texted the entire, for an hour and a half while I'm driving, almost myself killed a couple times, talked on the phone, got home, texted until probably three o'clock in the morning. So she could carry a conversation. Super funny.
Starting point is 00:30:42 She at least thinks she's funny. Like you. So she's super funny, super smart, really cool chick. I go to bed. The next day I call her, I said, great, when do you want to go out? And she goes, oh, my God. She says, are you sure about this? She's like, you don't understand.
Starting point is 00:30:55 I said, look, what does it matter? I said, we go on a couple days. And she says, listen, she said, Matt, I already like you. I already know I like you. I already know this, you're a great guy. I can tell I like you. And I went, well, then let's go out. And then she said, let me think about this.
Starting point is 00:31:13 Came back a couple hours later, we start texting. And she's like, okay, look. Yeah, let's go out. Let's go out. So we schedule a time to go out. Now, the problem was I had to go to Ohio. So I go to Ohio and I come back and we're supposed to go out. Wait.
Starting point is 00:31:33 No, that's not true. That's not true. Scratch that. That's not when that happened. So what happened is I, no, it was a few days. It was a few days later. Like she had something to do. Then I had something to do.
Starting point is 00:31:44 So it was like three days, four days later we were going to go out. The whole time, we're texting, texting, texting. You know, you're so funny, you're so this. So there was a line of communication open at all times. Open line of communication going all the way up to the day I'm supposed to meet her. Actually, I'm supposed to meet her that. Like right then, I'm supposed to meet her. We were going to meet at Ford's Garage in between the two of us.
Starting point is 00:32:06 So it was like a 45-minute drive for both of us. Perfect. We have the time. We send it. Everything's great. and then and then she ghost me ghost me
Starting point is 00:32:21 blocked or not or just no just ghosts I love the I like the fact that you didn't hold back and laugh and laugh it was yeah I'm right so right now
Starting point is 00:32:30 I'm just you know I mean at least manufacturing at least pretend to be a sensitive person and not like well I'm sure she broke your heart
Starting point is 00:32:40 I did like her I mean, I did, you know, but, you know, it's one date. It's not broken heart. It's one date, okay? So it's one good date where it was like, wow, I felt like there's a connection. Well, plus, this is my Dr. Phil. Okay, kind of situation here. Plus, you saw a possibility of getting over Jess with this girl.
Starting point is 00:33:01 Yes. Which really, I think, was a silver lining of this whole thing. Oh, my God, I found somebody that can replace this person. Right. And I don't know about, I don't want to say replace, but somebody that can help me get over. Let's say, let's say get over. Somebody that can... You found your rebound.
Starting point is 00:33:14 Somebody that... What is it? Listen. I mean, can you... Like, I found somebody that I thought I would have interest in that I would like, that I could maybe help me move on.
Starting point is 00:33:23 That's what I thought. Copy, can you Google rebound to see that's a definition of it? I hate to say that because I don't feel like, like, I don't see me... I don't know about the whole getting over somebody. You know, sometimes you just don't get over people. You just realize you just go on.
Starting point is 00:33:37 So the point is, is that I feel like this is somebody that could help take my mind off of her, somebody that could... It's a different direction. So I was excited about it. Somebody I was genuinely interested in. Well, she ghosted me. I was going off like a total fucking pussy.
Starting point is 00:33:54 Is that it? No, no, but I'm thinking like if, if. I got Kobe fucking laughing. If you ever had, I don't know, if you were ever planning to use this platform to find dates. Yeah. The fact that you're exposing yourself, like listen, I don't care who you are, I'm never going to get over this girl. No, I, you know, that's, that's, you know, you know, I mean. not, that's not what's happened.
Starting point is 00:34:14 What I'm saying is that... I'm sure there's a bunch of women right now. Matt Cox, yeah. No, what I'm saying... Let's go for the Latino. Listen, the chick that I end up with knows what I'm saying. Okay.
Starting point is 00:34:25 So I'm not concerned about that. Yeah. Well, listen, there's how many girls out there, they broke up, I broke up, and they're always going to kind of be like, well, that person's special. Do they get over them?
Starting point is 00:34:35 Is it like, as crazy as it sounds, I'm a romantic. God, are you fucking serious? Dude, I married my elementary school, sweetheart. She's the mother of my two kids. I was a horrible husband. But until this date, that was a love of my life. Okay. What can I do? See? It happens. People know. People understand that, right? Yeah. So what ends up happening is. But I'm open to options. So, you know. Oh, yeah. I'm looking. I'm looking. Listen, I'm dying to get over this chicken. I'm, I'm
Starting point is 00:35:05 hoping that happened. Then this may have been it, but it goes bad. Okay. So she goes to me, whatever. Okay. I don't know what happened. but I end up sending her a message. Like, after a couple of days, I'm just like... Are you like insanely texting her? Oh, no, I'm not a nut, bro. I'm not stalking her. Okay.
Starting point is 00:35:23 I'm just texting you right now to see if you got my last text? No, no, I'm not an idiot. First of all, it's Messenger. You know if they got your last text. I'm going to send you... Not send you. I'm going to just... Well, I guess can I...
Starting point is 00:35:42 Can I send it? Oh, wait, did I, I know what I did? I got it, I got it, I got it. I know what I did. I think I actually already did this so that I could, so that you can, you'll realize, you'll say, okay, I get it. Hold on. What is this?
Starting point is 00:36:14 Oh, Jesus. What happened here? Oh, okay. I really, I think I fucked up. You know where glasses to read their text? No. I mean, I do need glasses, but I'm usually pretty good. It's pretty bright.
Starting point is 00:36:30 Okay, here's what I'm going to do. I'm just going to tell you what it is. I didn't actually already, I thought I'd saved it, but I was prepared so it could read it. But whatever. The point is, I basically send her a text, and I said, listen, it appears that you've ghosted me. I'm like, you know, I said, I personally think I deserve better than that. I said, I said, there's a lot of ways you could have handled this better. You could
Starting point is 00:36:52 have told me, and this is like, I don't remember exactly what I said. Basically said, look, you could have simply told me, I don't want to date you, I want to spend the rest of my time with my, with my kids. You could have said, I don't like you. I'm not ready emotional. Not ready. I don't like you. I don't know. Right, right. There was lots of ways, but to simply just not respond. I said, I believe I deserved a little bit more respect than that. I said, but you know what? I said, I get it. I said, you're not interested. That's fine. I said, what I would like to say is this. I said, given your situation, I want to let you know that I hope you have the best result possible given the issue at hand. And I wish the absolute best for you. I said, and I said, and I am genuinely
Starting point is 00:37:31 sad that you and I didn't get to know each other. And that's really all I have to say. So here was her response to that. Oh my god, that long text. Oh, yeah. She sent, yeah. So, oh, no, I sent that to her. A week goes by. So I sent my text, and a week goes by.
Starting point is 00:37:47 I'm done. Like, I don't, she's gone. I've not been thinking about this shit. And one day, she hits me up on Messenger and here's what it says. It has nothing to do with not being interested. It has to do with being scared and feeling things I'm not sure I'm ready for. And being terrified to move forward, BC for some fucked up reason I don't feel like I should be able to. It has to do with feeling guilty for still being the one living for some reason.
Starting point is 00:38:11 I owe you an apology for ghosting. It is so unbelievably out of character for me. But I'm not myself anymore to say the least. The last thing I wish to do is hurt you or anyone. And I'm scared that in my current situation, hurting people I care about is inevitable. So I'm scared to care in a way. Okay. Now, why does you sound like a robot?
Starting point is 00:38:33 Just kidding. I thought maybe... Well, bothers me that you're laughing, which means that people I don't think... You know what I picture coming somebody like going I'm sorry, man
Starting point is 00:38:42 but I can not go out with you. I mean you've really ruined I really honestly genuinely at this point I wish Josh had been here so what ends up happening is I text her back you know
Starting point is 00:38:51 hey don't be silly this is ridiculous you know and then she comes back and we end up so you reconnected we reconnected and I mean
Starting point is 00:38:59 when I say reconnected I mean like literally that this is the message and I mean it goes it just goes on and on. I mean, it sounds like you had a legit reason like this and I, you know. I mean, this is like we just went on and on.
Starting point is 00:39:14 So the point is, is we're going on and on. We end up getting on the phone. So I finally I say to her, look, just call me. Boom, immediately she calls me. She says, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's okay. I get it. You're scared.
Starting point is 00:39:24 You're freaked out. It's fine. I said, so what's the change of heart? And she said, talk to my daughter. My daughter said that I should date you. My kids want me to date. They want me to date you. They're like, mom, you should date this guy.
Starting point is 00:39:36 You said you really like him. He's a great guy. He's this. He's that. You had to felt there was a connection. We want you to be happy. Nice. And I said, okay.
Starting point is 00:39:44 And she said, and I said, look, I said, like I said, we don't even know. And she says, listen, Matt, let's be honest. She says, let's be honest. She said, I already like you. I know I'm going to like you. She says, and let's be honest, you've met me. I went right. She was by the second.
Starting point is 00:39:58 She was by art. She was, in two more dates. She's, you're going to be in love. I'm amazing. And I just died laughing. I said, this chick, that's me, bro. That's me. She's sweetie.
Starting point is 00:40:09 And I went, I said, oh, I said, you know, you are amazing. She's, I really am. She's, I really am. And I said, absolutely. She said, so, yeah, I definitely want to move this forward. She was, what are your thoughts on things going bad? And I said, first of all, she said, you know, I remember at one point, she said, you understand that if this works out, she says, and I feel like it will. She says, this will be an amazing romance.
Starting point is 00:40:35 She's for maybe two years. She's, if we're lucky, she says, then it's going to be six months to a year of real, really, really a bad situation. And she says, are you okay with that? And I go, and then she said, then I die. She goes, and you spend the rest of your life trying to get over me. And I said, honestly, I said, if I spend the rest of my life trying to get over you, I go, you are worth it.
Starting point is 00:40:56 Yeah, absolutely. And she goes, I said, so if that's what, I said, if I get two or three solid years, I said, that's a fucking blessing. I'll take it. Let me tell you, I think these girls, and I'm talking about her and other girls that may be in that situation, they don't understand that we've been to prison, bro. Yeah. We lost people that we loved and people and things that we had. So we're okay with losing.
Starting point is 00:41:19 Right. It's random. Listen, I always say that I've been losing my whole. If you're not losing in life, you're not trying hard enough. And you're holding on to shit that you're going to lose anyways. Not just that. I told her, I said, look, I could die in a car accident on my way home. You could die of a brain embolism tomorrow.
Starting point is 00:41:34 You may not die of cancer at all. We don't know. What I do know is what I'm concerned about right now is making it to tomorrow morning. And I said, that's all I'm concerned with. And the fact of the matter is, I said, anything above that is a bonus. And I said, and when bad things come up, I said, at that point, I will deal with it. I said, I'm not going to run away. And she went, God, she says, you were saying all the right things.
Starting point is 00:41:58 She says, do you have any idea? She said, I mean, I just didn't think I was going to meet a guy like you. plus she was like plus you weren't mad you weren't angry about me disappearing and i was like no why would i be angry and i said i was sad i was just kind of sad about it like i'm and you know and i said look i'm not i'm not that guy i'm not your ex-boyfriend who's going to call you names and pick on you and be an asshole i'm not going to be that person i'm not going to question where you've been or if you're faithful or i'm not doing that if i start to not trust you i'll just stop seeing you like i'm not i'm not doing that so
Starting point is 00:42:32 we talk it's great she's like I like you so much oh my god I can't wait to see you I can't wait this is great this is great when can we see each other I said boom let's go tonight great Ford's garage no no no no no that's not true that's not true we went up about three more days no then I went to Ohio
Starting point is 00:42:48 so then I go to Ohio we're texting the whole time damn it didn't go to Ohio it was uh it was um Oklahoma I went to Oklahoma City I was gonna say yeah you were in Oklahoma no no no oh that was so I went to Oklahoma and we're texting the whole time. She's telling me about her kids, what's going on?
Starting point is 00:43:06 I'm telling me, hey, I'm doing this. I'm sending her pictures of the shoot that I did. I did a whole commercial thing up there. So I sent her pictures, like we're talking, texting, we're flirting, we're great. We talk on the phone. Like, everything's great. I get back. We're supposed to go.
Starting point is 00:43:18 Oh, I remember what I told her. I said, where do you want to go? And she said, well, I said, we'll go out Saturday the day after I get back. And she was Saturday. She went, well, what time Saturday I go? No, no, no. all Saturday. The whole day, I go, what's on your bucket list?
Starting point is 00:43:35 Let's start checking some shit off. What? I don't know. She had already told me they were thinking she had a bucket list. And she goes, okay, she was, you know what? She said, chalupas. I went, what? She was chalupa.
Starting point is 00:43:47 She was, in Clearwater Beach. She was, I used to, I stayed for a week when I'm in my teens on Clearwater Beach, and there was a place there that I used to eat chalupas at every day. They were amazing. I want to go there and get chalupas. I haven't had one in like 20 years. You know what? When people are close to dying, the always, the last thing they want is something Hispanic.
Starting point is 00:44:08 What a dick! We are on... Listen, take note. If he has a channel. We are on everybody's bucket of this. If he ever has a channel, do not subscribe. All right. So, what ends up happening, I mean, do you understand that part of being like a kind of like a YouTube personality is being likable?
Starting point is 00:44:27 Listen, I'm just stating facts here. And what bothers me is Colby doesn't say anything. Do you know that Colby let you and I say fans only for a fucking hour? Yeah, Kobe. And he was fine with it. And he was okay with it. Yeah, yeah. Listen.
Starting point is 00:44:42 He's making notes. Fans only. Yeah. By the 20th comment, I started hating Colby. I know. Because I'm having guys are like, why were you doing that? That was funny, bro. Why were you doing it?
Starting point is 00:44:52 I was like, no, no. Because I don't know. You're trying to hide the fact that you're not. Yeah. Like he doesn't know that it's. No, I don't. You know. So anyway.
Starting point is 00:45:01 Um, what I do now. Oh, no. Uh, and, and what ends up happening is, I'm all excited. I get back. I'm ready to go. Boom. She ghosted me again. On that Saturday?
Starting point is 00:45:14 The day of the date? No, no. No, no. No, on Friday, the day before that. The day before the date. Okay. Nothing. And I flew back.
Starting point is 00:45:22 I'm like, I couldn't believe it. I was like, I cannot believe this shit. Just did this again. So, I see. send her another, I send her another thing saying, I don't know what happened. I don't know if you're, I don't know if things went wrong. I don't know if you're in the house. Like, I don't know what happened.
Starting point is 00:45:41 I don't know what, what went wrong with this chick. But something went wrong. Is she, I don't know. I don't know. But I was just in absolute shock. And I thought, this is insane. Like, the last conversation we had was she was talking about selling her house, taking the money taking the money and spending like the last she said spend the next year just traveling
Starting point is 00:46:08 and she I go where do you want to go and she was like I want to go here and here I said I got a passport we got to get your passport I said I'm ready to go she's are you serious you would go I said absolutely I would go absolutely go with you said I will be your wingman wherever you want to go you know I'm assuming that this works out and she's it's going to work out I said this everything about her is saying this is it this is it I'm like okay great now keep in mind too I'm I'm still in my mind thinking, look, we haven't kissed. Kissing is a big thing for me. Well, like, I'm a big thing for everybody.
Starting point is 00:46:37 Yeah. I think it's like, I'm a good kisser. Like, listen, that's like, I'm a good kisser. So I need, I need, I need, I need to, she has to be a good kisser. Say something. Say something. Say something. Fuck all. You know, do you realize how good I've been about cussing on this show?
Starting point is 00:46:52 I haven't cursed and so, there's been. I was going to say that was a rumor in Coleman Lowe, but why, why am I going to go? Why, why, why am I going to go? there. There is no need for me to say that. I will not say that. What a dick. So, anyway, I think Colby comes here. I don't like Colby even being here anymore. Colby loves it. We're getting a shield. He enjoys entertainment. He just sits there and laughs. We're getting the shield. I want a, I'm getting a particle board like things so you can't see him anymore. Anyway, what ends up happening is, so I send her another thing saying, hey, I think
Starting point is 00:47:24 I deserve better than this. The same basic thing I sent the first time. But regardless, I'm not mad. I'm just really sad that we didn't get to know each other. Good luck with your with good luck with. I mean, you're going to put yourself in her shoes too. I'm not judging her. Well, I'm in that position, you, you must be an emotional roller coaster. No doubt. No doubt. Listen, oh, listen, by it, bro. I can tell you right now, there were three different phone calls. She cried every time. Every single time she started crying. Yeah, like, yeah. So she was, she's emotionally, she's upset. But to say, all I need really is, I don't even a good excuse. It could be, it could be like, look, just go fuck yourself. Not interested.
Starting point is 00:48:00 Yeah, or to reopen. She couldn't put closure on it, you know, the first time around, like, listen, I'm sorry a ghost at you, but it's not going to work out, have a nice day, boom, boom, boom. Absolutely. Yeah, no, that, that, yeah, that was wrong. So here's the thing. I talk to my ex-wife, right? Like, I tell my friend Stacy, and I tell my ex-wife everything.
Starting point is 00:48:18 So I've been telling them the whole time. Now, my ex-wife is telling me the whole time my ex-wife is saying, you should date her. Now, Stacy's saying, absolutely not. She was, Matt, emotionally, you're already in a bad spot because of Jess. So for you to take on this responsibility to be with this girl, she said, I know you. You'll be there at her deathbed. She goes, you're a ride or die kind of person. She said, so I know that you'll be there to the end.
Starting point is 00:48:45 The new BMO, V.I. Porter, MasterCard, is your ticket to more, more perks, more points, more flights, more of all the things you want in a travel awards card and then some get your ticket to more with the new bemo v i porter master card and get up to $2,400 in value in your first 13 months terms and conditions apply visit bemo.com slash viporter to learn more she said and i think that if she if it takes if she could be start getting sick she could be sick for two years she said i know you she said what happens if when if she can't have sex what happens if like there's all kinds of i well first of all i went like 13 years without having sex. So I'm going to be okay. Well, but not by choice. You know, you know what she means. I always pull that line to a listen. I can't control myself. I went eight and a half year.
Starting point is 00:49:35 Well, first of all, I can. I'm not an animal. I can. It's fine. I'll deal with it. But I was like, look, it doesn't matter. I said, I'm not going to, I don't, you know what I don't worry about? I don't worry about dying in my car on the way to the grocery store. I'm not worried about how long this takes. I'm worried about right now, is it good. Life is good. Things are good. Enjoy the moment. And so, but Stacy's saying no, no, no, my ex-wife. is saying, absolutely, you like her, she sounds cool, she sounds like she gets you, you get her, you should do it. By the way, I don't know if you remember,
Starting point is 00:50:06 but I didn't know all these details, but you called me one time and you said, listen, I met this girl, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, and let me tell you what's going on. And I think I told you, I said, go for it, bro. Right. She sounds amazing. If you have an amazing relationship for two years,
Starting point is 00:50:20 right, right. That's more the most. That's more than most. Right. And so great, no problem, cool. So I call my ex-wife, and by the way, my ex-wife, although I give her a hard time all the time, her intuition is, and her ability to predict how things are going to go is amazing. Like, when I first got in trouble, before I got in trouble, there were two people that got busted, friends of ours, good friends of ours. We'd gone on vacations together, we babysat each other's kids.
Starting point is 00:50:51 My ex-wife's first thing she said was, we don't talk to him anymore. I went, what? She said, stop talking to him. I went, why? She said, they've been indicted by the FBI. And I went, or by the federal government. She was, they're going to cooperate, and they're going to cooperate against you. And I went, you're crazy.
Starting point is 00:51:07 They wouldn't do that. They're friends of ours. She's, Matt, you don't understand. Like, her uncle had gone to prison. Like, she knows people in and up. She said, don't talk to them anymore. She knew who it goes. Literally, within two months, they wore a wire on me.
Starting point is 00:51:22 And that was my first case. Second time I get in trouble, she's telling me, don't do this don't do that what are you doing like all the things she's saying you just did what that's a mistake she's pinpointing things that are that went wrong sure enough they all go wrong um literally the whole time my dating life she's been like that's a bad idea that's a good idea that no no no so fine what ends up happening is i call her up and i said this was a couple days ago i said hey um what's going on she goes hey what's going on so i start talking about what's happening with me and you know um so i start talking to her and she goes what are you doing she
Starting point is 00:52:00 was she said what happened to the girl alissa and i went what do you mean she was what happened to her you liked her like this other girl you don't like this one you're saying she's okay but we haven't really spending time together this one this like you're telling me about these girls like there's there's another girl that i like you know she's and i've really only spent a little bit of time with her and she's like you know what about this what about that and she's like the one girl you really liked. She said, what happened with that? And I said, I told you, she ghosted me. She was, no, you said she came back around. I said, yeah. And then she ghosted me again. And she goes, no, I know, but what have you done since then? I go, since she stopped responding to
Starting point is 00:52:33 my text messages? I said, nothing. I'm not going to stalk her. And she goes, do you know where she lives? And I went, I mean, I do. Yeah. She said, you know her name? I went, well, she goes by this on Facebook. And I told her the name. I said, but she told me what her husband's name was, what her married name was so I do know her full name and I'm assuming the house is in her name or her husband name and she said well yeah I mean I know the county she lives and I can figure it out and she said um so go to her house and I go oh no no no no that's a bad idea that's a bad idea she's no listen to me listen to me she said the grand gesture absolutely she said she's scared she's told you she's scared not one time did she ever tell you that she didn't like you or think
Starting point is 00:53:12 it wasn't going to work between you that's not her issue her issue is is this guy willing to put up with the fact that I have cancer and then I'm going to die and I'm going to get progressively worse. Is he going to do that? Does he like me enough to stick with me through this? That's her concern. And she said, that guy who really will do that is the guy that shows up at your house and says, just talk to me. I wanted to make sure you're okay. Are you okay? And I go, I don't know, Kayla. I mean, she lives in this house. She's got a couple of kids that still live there. Like, I don't, I don't know. And she also has a room. who's blind she has a but one of the
Starting point is 00:53:51 roommate that rents a room is blind Alyssa yeah Alyssa okay she has a blind roommate so and she kind of takes care of right and I said she's all and she goes okay so there are people there it's not the kids aren't there alone it's there and if she's not there she's you don't have to go in
Starting point is 00:54:07 she's what you know what kind of car she drives I said yeah she actually drove an old police cruiser like an old police car okay that was funny yeah I thought that it was actually kind of cool like you're driving like an old cruiser like it's okay so So, anyway, I was like, okay, I sat there and I thought, yeah, you know what, I'm, uh, okay, are you sure, Kayla, she's, Matt, have I ever told you? I wouldn't tell you this. And I go, and I said, yeah, but then it's like stalking or something. She goes, yeah, and if you go show up and she says, what are you doing at my house? You need to leave. I said, yeah, yeah. I'm with her on that. I said, okay, I said, all right, I get it. I get it. I can do this. I'll do it. Okay. I said, well, it's like an hour and a half drive. So I said, okay, so I drive an hour and a half. Colby doesn't know any of this, by the way.
Starting point is 00:54:50 Do you? No. So, because this just happened. So I drive for an hour and a half. I drive an hour and a half. And just before I get there. What time of the day? I was going to get there at 7.30.
Starting point is 00:55:04 At night. So it's getting dark. It's already dark. It's already getting, by the time I get there, it's dark. But it's 7. So just before I get there, my ex-wife calls me, she says, are you there yet? I said, no. She said, look, I thought about it.
Starting point is 00:55:13 You can't show up empty-handed. Go get flowers. And I thought. Nice touch. just to make this more embarrassing, she's going to, she's going to ask me to get flowers. Did you get the flowers?
Starting point is 00:55:28 Of course. It was an extra 15, of course, an extra 15 minute, you know, on the Google thing. Brought me to Publix. I bought for 20 bucks. I got a dozen roses.
Starting point is 00:55:38 I get them. Okay, great. I get in my car. I drive back. Are you, call Kayla? Are you sure about this? She did you get the flowers? I said, absolutely.
Starting point is 00:55:44 She's, okay. And you're going. Yeah. She's okay, look, she's make sure that there's, not like five cars there like she you don't pull in it's her husband's there and I go she's not gonna have a husband she's you don't know that I said no I do know that her Facebook profile says widow I talked to my buddy Visser Visser said her husband died she has cancer her husband and her husband
Starting point is 00:56:03 I said all of this is true kids three kids one of them's gone okay it's a Saturday night so it's okay if there was one car one of the kids came back whatever no no the kids are like 13 and 14 or like yeah like they're young they're I don't know how exact age they're young one's like 18 or 19 she's out of the house so we got two young kids probably not their home alone maybe but maybe not regardless i pull up to the house so i drive in i pull up i look i don't see her car there are two cars in the driveway but this is in the sticks bro and i remember thinking and cars looked abandoned like they looked like this is the kind of like this is like lower middle class in the sticks next to a lake blue color blue collar definitely so i was like okay um you know
Starting point is 00:56:48 It's the kind of place where people park on their front yard. There's a driveway, but whatever. Then there's cars that are abandoned in the front yard. But these are cars that are clearly immobile. Okay. But I don't see her car. But I look and it's dark. It's dark out.
Starting point is 00:57:01 There's no real lights. Well, there's some lights, but her house is so far apart, so far away. When I'm looking at the house, it's very dark, but I can see movement in the house. Like the lights are shifting. There's clearly things are happening. Maybe a TV is on. Maybe people are walking around. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:57:15 So I look and I went, fuck. I check the address again. Now I'm getting nervous. Check the address. And I went, she's not here. I thought, you know what I'll do? I'm going to go down there, knock on the door. Definitely her house.
Starting point is 00:57:30 Maybe it's not, but I think it is. I'm going to knock on the house. I'm going to knock on the door. If her roommate answers her kids, I'm going to say, is Alyssa here? They say no. I'm going to say, listen, my name's Matt. Can you please give her these flowers, tell her I stop by and leave. That's it.
Starting point is 00:57:44 Yeah. So I get out of my vehicle I walk down the driveway I walk down the walkway and as I'm walking towards the door a car from the street
Starting point is 00:57:58 whips in around my car and down is probably 100 feet at least 100 100 feet from the road swoops in through the over the yard drives on the yard all the way up to about
Starting point is 00:58:10 five or no about eight or nine feet away from me and stops and it's the cruiser it's her car so it didn't go on the on the driveway no no even though the driveway is available it pulls all the way up grass everything took everything on the grass right very aggressively right up to me could have been the roommate driving so pulls right up and stops boom stops and I turn and so I'm sitting there holding a dozen roses right where you dressed up I was wearing a I was wearing I'm I was wearing I was wearing I was wearing I was wearing skinny jeans a
Starting point is 00:58:45 tight t-shirt and I basically look like a faggot. So, you know, yeah, yeah, I'm thinking I'm looking like, I'm thinking I'm looking sleek. I look very GQ. I've got the dozen roses. A city boy. He's a city boy. Definitely, metrosexual. The hair looks good.
Starting point is 00:58:57 And so what I do is I turn him, I turn, so the car pulls up and I turn and I'm holding the flowers. And I'm like, I go, hey, like this, right? You don't see who's driving. No, dark windows. Hey, suddenly the door opens. Boom. A guy that's at least six foot four stands up. He looks like slender man.
Starting point is 00:59:15 He was thin, had a baseball, but he had a baseball cap on, his blue jeans are frayed, he's got like a tight little t-shirt on, and I look at him and I thought, fuck, this ain't good. Then the back door pop, the car pops open. I'm thinking maybe she's getting out of the back. Boom. Two kids jump out and they rush right by me and right in, now, you know. Yeah. You know, but what 13, 14 year old young kids?
Starting point is 00:59:41 Like, they're going to stop and be like, well, there's any struck that, like, absolutely. So the guy, I realized right away, I'm thinking, the guy, when we pulled in, the guy said, go straight in the house. Yeah. And he turns, and so he closes the door, and I'm standing there and waiting for him to dress me, he looks at me and he goes, he goes, you, uh, you waiting for somebody, Bubba? You know, he goes, you here for somebody, Bubba? I said, yeah, I'm here for Alyssa. I said, is she here? And he goes, I'll go get her.
Starting point is 01:00:05 And he walks right by me. And I start walking towards the door. So now I'm about 15 feet away from the door. White guy? 15 feet away from the guy not hillbillia like a redneck guy you clearly this is a hunter
Starting point is 01:00:19 like I remember thinking too hunting season like slender man hunting season is it hunting season what's going on so he walks right in the front door and I'm in the sticks and he walks in the front door
Starting point is 01:00:30 opens the door and closes it but when he opens it I'm in shadow I'm in the dark so but I can see in there it's light and I can see her standing there as soon as he opens the door she's looking right at him she looks out at me but I don't think she can see me
Starting point is 01:00:42 then he turns around he closes the door for a second turns around opens the door and says hey bro he goes hey bubba what's your what's your name i go my name's matt she knows who i am i threw a little base in my voice of course yeah you know i stood on my tippy toes so i said uh you know i go my name's mad i said uh she knows who i am and he goes okay closes the door talks for another minute opens the door what closes the door and walks all the way walks right by me i watch him walk all the way to the car he opens the car door he leans in the car he leans in the car he he then comes back out of the car, he's holding an AR-15. A rifle.
Starting point is 01:01:18 The rifle. The AR-15 assault rifle. The ones that want to ban from... Pulls it out, holds it up, looks at me, puts it down, and walks right by me. And when he was walking by me,
Starting point is 01:01:29 I go, that ain't good. And he walks, doesn't say anything, walks right in the front door. And I went, like, what's going on? Closes a door, talks to her for a second,
Starting point is 01:01:41 then he opens the door she's standing about he went in the house with a rifle yeah walked right by me okay goes in the house and I'm thinking what's going on like well like I he said he'd get her now he gets the rifle then so suddenly the door opens
Starting point is 01:01:56 all the way open wide open boom he's standing there with the AR 15 like this he's holding like the military stance and he says and she's standing behind him like just looking over his shoulder at me not you know just kind of like like like oh like what the fuck and and he says he goes yo baba you got to go and i went and you like i didn't even understand because i sat and i she's holding first of all he's holding the gun
Starting point is 01:02:24 and i looked at him and i went um i go excuse me and he goes yo baba he said you got to go and i went oh whoa whoa i said hey bro uh did not know it was that serious i said my bad i'm going I got you I start walking backwards and he's walking towards me and I turn around I said I'm gonna leave these flowers here on her car and I drop them on the car
Starting point is 01:02:47 I said because they're not for me and I turn around and he goes I got you I got you so I start turn around I start walking up the sidewalk and he goes hey he goes yo blah I said yeah what's up bro and he goes
Starting point is 01:02:58 how'd you find her address and I looked at him and I go it's on the internet and he goes is it? I said it is if you look hard enough and he goes all right all right I go all right man
Starting point is 01:03:08 I turn around and I start walking as I'm walking up the driveway he goes yo hey Jesus Christ I turn around I go yeah man what's up and he said bro I'm sorry you're having a bad night and I went
Starting point is 01:03:19 no I said you know what man I said it's my fault I said I misread the signals I said and I said I thought I'd come here and make a romantic gesture I said and it was just it was just a bad idea on my part I said no hard feelings
Starting point is 01:03:33 I appreciate it I said I'll see you later I said, see you around, bro. I just turned around, I kept walking. Walk got my car, drove off. As I'm driving off, I immediately say, hey, Siri, call my ex-wife. I call my ex-wife, Kayla. She comes on.
Starting point is 01:03:48 She's there with her sister-in-law, by the way. She puts me on speaker. She goes, what happened? And I went, well, I said, a guy just pulled an AR-15 on me and told me to fucking get out of the, to leave. And she goes, oh, my God, you went to the front door? She goes, I didn't think you really go. Well, are you what? And she goes, I mean, I, I, I told me to go.
Starting point is 01:04:10 She goes, I know, but I thought maybe you, I didn't really think you'd go. I mean, wow, so what happened? But I tell you what? Before you continue with this story, there is, I mean, I listen, I don't know. I don't know how you guys do it. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, can I say something one more time? And I need to interrupt, but here's what I want to say. I want to say this.
Starting point is 01:04:27 So, Colby, all right. So the guy, it turns out the guy that pulled the gun on me is the ex-boyfriend. Chris, Chris, that she has a restraining order on. So, I'm going to let you, just to give you an idea of what I was dealing with, Chris is 6'4, and this is Chris's picture. And here's another picture of Chris. I think this is a hog picture. We should do the hog picture. And this is a picture of Chris and Alyssa shooting shotguns.
Starting point is 01:04:59 This one right here. Nice. That's Alyssa, that's Chris. They're shooting shotguns. So Chris is the kind of guy. that walks around with a marlborough red in his mouth and has sun classes even when it's not even when it's cloudy and wears a baseball cap and although listen if you got to get kicked out of a place he was very polite he was very polite to me very nice which is my point you know
Starting point is 01:05:19 that that whole scene would it played out different if it would have been me on the front shoot you you're Hispanic absolutely and that's another thing that I don't understand why why do white folks always resource to the to the AR 15 make this a racist I mean, it's like, whatever happened, boom, here's the AR-15, you know? Well, here's what bothers me. Like, the truth is, like, and you're interacting with this guy that is holding a rifle. Like, when he walked by with a rifle, I would have been like, listen, bro. I'm gone.
Starting point is 01:05:49 I'm not. I'm for Uber. Did you order Chipotle? No, I'm out. You know, I'm Uber-Eat. You're sitting there talking to this guy. Well, here's the thing. First of all.
Starting point is 01:05:58 I'm telling him that you are picking up his cheek. Like, listen, I brought flowers for your girl. He's just a romantic gesture. And the guy is holding a rifle. That's how. Bad days happen, Bubba. That's how I roll. So, I didn't do anything wrong.
Starting point is 01:06:11 So, what? I mean, to him you did? I mean, he may, no, no, no, I don't have a relationship with this guy. She may have a relationship with him. I don't. That's between you and her. You go to my house with a dozen roses. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:24 And you're telling me, I'm here, you know. I was told to be romantic to your girl. I was specifically told she hadn't seen him in over six months. By her. By her? Of course. Who else? So what have I done wrong?
Starting point is 01:06:36 Any normal human being knows he hasn't done anything wrong. Clearly, my girlfriend was dating him or when, or he, there's something going on between them. I'll talk to her. Like, I don't. And that's why he's holding the rifle in his hand. That's what bothers me. Here's the problem. He's six foot four.
Starting point is 01:06:54 He doesn't need a rifle. I'm five foot six. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm wearing a tight shirt, tight blue jeans. I'm holding a dozen roses. I don't, clearly I don't have a gun. Like, there's no way you can even look at it. me and think i were there thorns on the roses maybe he was concerned you know so you don't need an
Starting point is 01:07:10 a if you do need an ar 15 to ask me to leave or get me to leave like there's an issue and so right away i realized that with this well he was making a statement like get out stay out and hey and hey by the way chris if you are watch let's go this if you are watching chris i heard the statement loud and clear i i i got you won't be going back by there I promise you that. There will be no more delivery of a dozen roses. Okay? You got that.
Starting point is 01:07:42 Because I mean, like, I was just like, like, I can't be, I can't be dealing with people that were pulling guns on me. That wasn't a gun,
Starting point is 01:07:49 man. That was an assault rifle. I mean, that could have got, do you realize how bad that could have gone? Yeah. Yeah. Oh,
Starting point is 01:07:55 I do. Yeah. For me, I do. Like, I would have shown up and with my, you know, Mississippi accent and say,
Starting point is 01:08:02 you know, I'm here for Alisa. He would have been like, yeah. Well, Look, so I leave I get in my car I don't know who this guy is
Starting point is 01:08:09 Get in my car, I drive I tell, call my ex-wife She mocks me mercilessly What are you thinking? What were you saying? She's like, I told you to make sure That she was there Make sure there were no other cars
Starting point is 01:08:23 I said there were two cars They were abandoned There were people moving inside I just and she wasn't there So why wouldn't I pull up and say hi? How she texted you? Who? Alisa?
Starting point is 01:08:31 Alissa, no. Have you texted her? No. here's the thing like didn't block me on Facebook didn't block me on anything well she said she wanted you to write her story dude well here it is that's the point is is that so my my ex-wife is just like dying her her sister-in-law I mean my ex-sister-in-law they are roaring laughing and they are just like how did you get yourself in this situation I'm like you got me in the situation I'm like you you owe me $20 for roses you owe me $30 for the gas to get here and
Starting point is 01:09:04 back. You owe, I said, you owe me three hours of my time. $25 for the underwear because I just shut my pants when this guy pulled the AR-15. So, you know, I honestly, like, I wasn't scared because I wasn't like, I wasn't like, oh, I was just like, it wasn't until he opened the door and said, you got to leave that I was like, oh, I'm in trouble. Like, oh, this is, this shit, this just went bad. I really genuinely, after knowing her and talking with her, I really thought she was going to come to the front door and say, You know, Matt, listen, I got back with my Xbox. Aren't you worried? Maybe the guy has her, like, I don't know, tied down in the clogging, the basement or something. Well, honestly, when he opened the door, she's standing in the kitchen.
Starting point is 01:09:44 Oh, so you saw her? I saw her when he first opened the door to walk in. I looked and saw it. She was standing there. She was just standing there, like, she looked out at me, but she couldn't see who I was because I was standing in the dark. So that's why he turned around and said, what's your name? I said, Matt, she knows me.
Starting point is 01:09:59 So, look, the fact is that she left. I mean, he left, like, she could have left. and she has a restraining order against him so she says well and Vesser says because I tell you what now I'm questioning a bunch of stuff no no no and I know what you're saying so what I did was as soon as I went home
Starting point is 01:10:15 I contacted Vesser and I was like yo bro I said you got to call me so he calls me the next day and said listen let me tell you what happened and I tell him what happened as I'm telling him what happens I don't want to put his stuff out there but as I'm telling he he immediately goes that's Chris
Starting point is 01:10:29 that's Chris he says I'm going to send you a pitcher He sends me a picture. Bam, I go, yep, that's the guy. That's him. He goes, that's Chris. He goes, he was driving her car? I went, yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:39 Two kids in the back? I said, yeah. It's got an AR-15. I said, yeah. And he goes, Jesus, God Almighty. Then he tells me the history with him and this guy. There's a whole history there. Okay.
Starting point is 01:10:47 Like, he's like, look, the guy, he's got some issues. And he tells me, he's like, look, he's a nut job. He's got like five acres. He shoots guns all the time. He's a gun nut. So if we were going to do like, I don't know if COVID can do that, but if we were going to do like a stock market chart here, we could literally track your dating life going like, right, like, like, oh, now straight down.
Starting point is 01:11:09 Yeah, yeah, yeah, like Enron stock. Straight down. Is that Chris? Straight downhill. Yeah, it's not, it's not good. No, it's not good. The projections are not good. It's all bad.
Starting point is 01:11:20 It's all bad. I mean, you know, like, I've met some nice chicks. Yeah, but you're not interested on that. They don't, they don't appeal. I actually, let's follow a pattern here. Wait a minute. I actually have, like, I'm actually supposed to go out with another girl that I met. She's super cute, super adorable.
Starting point is 01:11:37 She, um, super young, bro. Like, like, like, like, like, criminal? Like, like, no, no, not like, put one in your account? Not registry, young. Okay. But, but, but young, like, 28 years old. And I, and I was like, and I had been asking my buddy Trian to set me up with her. And what's, because she's also wild.
Starting point is 01:11:56 And Trian was like, yeah, you ought to go out with her. And I was like, well, Set me up, set me up, and he never did. So the other day I went to the gym and I go, did you ever? And she was there. I was like, did you ever, why don't you set me up with this chick? What is your fucking problem? Well, I told you, I said, I keep forgetting.
Starting point is 01:12:08 I keep forgetting. And she's standing at the counter. I turned around and I said, and, uh, all right, I'm going to say her name. Or her first name is, uh, Ali. And I look at her and I go, and I go, Ali. She goes, yeah, what's up? I said, do you want to go out some time for dinner? And she looks at me and she goes, you mean like on a date?
Starting point is 01:12:24 And I went, yeah, like on a date. I'm assuming she's going to say no. already talked to her and doesn't want to tell me she's not interested she won't she didn't want to go out with you and I said yeah on a date and she is yeah I'll go on a date yeah absolutely no problem and I went I looked at him and I go you prick you should have said is this okay with your significant other or your husband or your ex-boyfriend she's actually getting a divorce of course she is you see predictable very predictable but you know what the difference is between you and I there's me I have a because I know somebody the other day put in the
Starting point is 01:12:59 Oh, I know what the difference is. The difference is I wait till they're getting a divorce and they're not living with them anymore. Oh my God. No, no, no. Do you want to go there? No. No, let's go there. This is not about me. This is about you. Okay. Okay. Because we need to talk. Let's do that. Let's do a podcast after that. How about we save that one for when I have my YouTube channel. How about and I'll make you a guest of it? How many husbands are there looking for you? So, but regardless of that, that was a part of the Dark Pass. But I have a daughter, I have a daughter that is 31 and a daughter that is 21. So I have an age. She's how old? My oldest is 31. Yeah. Are you serious? Bro, how old are you?
Starting point is 01:13:43 I started young. I told me I married my elementary school sweetheart at 16. So they're like that. You cannot date any younger than me. And I'm like, well, it's not fair because it's not my fault. I mean, it is, but it's not. That, you know, we are only 16 years apart. Okay, one more time.
Starting point is 01:14:00 How old is your oldest daughter? 31. So the other day I said, Matt, I wouldn't let you date my daughter. And somebody put on YouTube like, oh my God, all are his daughters. And I'm like, listen, it's not like I'm not going to let him date my 6-year-old. I'm also not going to let him date my 31-year-old. But she's married anyways. But regardless of that, okay.
Starting point is 01:14:17 I was going to say, if you're watching this, you need to contact me. Oh, I see. We will go to dinner. I will take you to dinner just so that we can put pictures so your dad will go nuts. They subscribe to your channel. Oh, nice. So, and there I was telling me, like, oh, my God, Dad. But we went to an event this weekend, and I made this beautiful girl, beautiful girl.
Starting point is 01:14:37 And we're all sitting, and I'm with my kids. And I'm like, oh, my God, look at this girl. She's beautiful. Like, you know, I would love to end up with somebody like that. And she's smart and witty. And my daughters are like, that. My youngest is like, I will make her life miserable. And then my oldest is like, I will cut the bitch.
Starting point is 01:14:55 And I'm like, okay, so I guess I'm a, yeah, I don't want to date your dog. So they want me to find, like, a 48-year-old woman. Oh, oh, come on. And I'm like, nobody wants to date a 48-year-old woman. Well, there is, listen, J-Lo is 52. Okay, well, look, that's a lot of, that's perfect, that's a perfect diet, it's perfect working out, it's perfect, like that's, that's unobtainable. Let's face it, 52-year-old women don't look like that. There is something that, look, dude.
Starting point is 01:15:21 Okay, that's true. I actually, there is a lot of good looking. Listen, I'm not, I'm not, I, okay, I actually, I actually met this chick that this is, funny i actually met a chick that flew in and for the weekend and hung out with me you know hung out with me for the weekend um college professor absolutely dropped that gorge a body and hold 55 and a body by the way a body that literally i'm telling you right now she could have been 25 years old runs marathons amazing yeah another chick i got this other chick that i've talked to and you get the airp discount when you go buying stuff nice what a dick what it's a win win for everybody this other
Starting point is 01:15:57 chick jean so there's a girl named jean that um that does a ball like not ballroom dancing but i guess whatever dancing she's like a like a professional dancer and she dances and stuff not like a pole dancer yeah she um super like a gorgeous gorgeous and i think she's 51 she 51 or 52 she's basically she's my age and both of them phenomenal looking you know what my issue is with these younger women other than of course of them look like hell by the way by the late 40s they're Most women are just falling apart. But if you have to explain the woman that you're with who, you know, the Cure and Black Sabbath or whatever you are into from your era, that's a pain in the ass.
Starting point is 01:16:38 Man, I don't want to go to a concert where, you know, and I'm definitely going to go to a Justin Bevan concert, you know. So it's just that difference of culture is, Colby, how old are you? Oh, my God. He's a child. You see? It's ridiculous. Good. Come on.
Starting point is 01:16:55 Yeah, I think. Colby still watching Pokemon. I think 34, 34, 35, like if I get a girl that's probably in her 30 to 35 range, that's probably a good range, right? I'll tell you the other thing that I find that it's not fair. Although this chick alley is pretty cute, super cute. The one that is Colby's age? Yes. Just to put in perspective.
Starting point is 01:17:14 Yes. I mean, you have to understand that. But look, I don't look 52. I'm 52. I don't, and I don't act 52. I'm extremely immature. This is a game, these are the games that my children play with me. Like my daughter goes, okay.
Starting point is 01:17:25 You look like you're in your 50s. No. Now, come on. I want people in the comments. Comments. Do I look 52 is one question. The second one. Does he, what? Do I look 48? Oh, 40. Oh, my God, you're 48. How hard have you lived, bro? Prison was rough. I had two kids, bro. And girls. They'll age you. Any father there will test to this. So 52. Do I look 15? Does he look 48? But my kids always make these numbers. They always say like, okay, so she's 30 and you're 48. Yeah. So that when you were 21, what?
Starting point is 01:17:56 She was three, and I'm like, listen, don't do that. And they're like, no, no, no, check this out. Imagine that you walk into a three-year-old birthday party. And you look at that three-year-old girl. And I'm like, listen, this is, you cannot play with the timelines like that because that doesn't work like that. Right, that's child. But that's their way of keeping me.
Starting point is 01:18:15 And the other thing is in this YouTube channel, right, women leave comments, but they're like, you don't want to reply to the comments and sound like a creep. Like the other day, somebody said, like, oh, my God, I will listen to anything he says with that accent. And I'm like, I mean, I get, send me, I love those messages, but why don't you send them to my email so we can establish some kind of communication? What you have to do is you have to say, say, you know, yeah, yeah. How do you not sound creepy? Shoot me your email. Shoot me an email.
Starting point is 01:18:42 Send pictures. Boom. Oh, yeah, that sounds top nuts. Look, I mean, what, you know, listen, here's the thing. What I do realize is that the way things are now are vastly different than they were 15, 16 years ago. People are much, much different now. Dating is more direct. More direct.
Starting point is 01:18:59 Dating is much different. And also, women and women and men are both looking for something that's almost unobtainable. Like, they don't want to accept any shortcomings at all. It's amazing. For perfection. They're looking for perfection. They're looking for the Instagram model. I was just going to tell you that.
Starting point is 01:19:17 I think it's a social media that has done that. Right. And it doesn't exist. No. Even your friends that are married, that are posting, if you look at their, their Facebook and Instagram, you're like, they look like they have a dream life. But I know that he's cheating on her. She's caught him twice.
Starting point is 01:19:32 I know that she's, this is filtered, that she's got wrinkles and she's 30 pounds overweight. I know that he, you know, you can sit there and say, I can. Yeah. But people, but people, that's what they're trying to obtain that, and it's unobtainable. But regardless, regardless. You know, this little exercise about the looks is going to be horrible for my self-esteem. So I'm just saying, I mean, you know, well. People are probably going to say, Matt, yeah, you look, you look like you're 60 and you look old.
Starting point is 01:19:58 Oh, no, I know. I know. I know. I already know. See, I say that. But I know they're not going to say that. So, all right. All right.
Starting point is 01:20:06 All right. All right. So, that was my, that was my Alyssa story and it went bad. You know what we should do? Can you once again, can you put up the blue, the picture of Alyssa with the blue eyes where she's got blue eyes. She's looking up. I'm going to show it to you. This is the picture I just thought.
Starting point is 01:20:23 like this picture right here and you know that this chick ghosted me twice and almost got me shot with an AR-15 so that to me that's dating in Florida you just don't know when it's going to go wrong it could go bad that could have gone really bad
Starting point is 01:20:39 very quickly so you know don't buy a chick a dozen roses and show up at her house with some grand gesture because the truth is you could end up dead the good news is I would have ended up with your channel all right so hey if you like the video, do me a favor, subscribe to the channel, hit the bell, share the video, and leave
Starting point is 01:20:58 a comment in the comment section for the algorithm, and if you're interested, oh, I have a Patreon account, please by all means. Even $7 a month helps. If you want to support me on Patreon, you can go to my Patreon. If you want to buy one of my books, I've got a bunch of books that I've written, including my personal memoir. Also, all of these paintings are for sale. A lot of people have left emails for me recently in the last month. I actually am kind of waiting to do more paintings and respond to those emails. But if you send me the email saying you are interested, I will absolutely, at some point in the very near future, next few weeks, I will respond to you and put you in the queue for whatever painting you want. That said, see ya.
Starting point is 01:21:44 No, we'll see.

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