Matthew Cox | Inside True Crime Podcast - Mafia Insider Reveals His Biggest Regrets

Episode Date: October 23, 2024

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I've gone to sit downs. When you get in there, you don't know if you're going to walk out of day. That's just how they operate. You don't know if you're going to walk out. I've known guys that were like, hey, I'm going to a sit down. And then they're gone. There's another story with this guy, Frankie. I was running this social club.

Comes to my house. It was like 8 in the morning. My mom, I just wake up like, and Frankie's in my bedroom. It's like, Frankie, what are you doing here? He goes, come on, get dressed. I said, can I ask you what's going on? My mom's now worried. My mom comes in, she's talking to me in Romania.

What's going on? What's going on? I turn it in Serbian because Romanian is a romance language, like Italian. Frankie can pick up on it. So I was just like in Serbia and I go, I need to go with him somewhere. She's like, are you coming back? You know? But she said in Romanian, are you coming back?

And he goes, oh, signora, don't worry. He's coming back. I'm like, that's bullshit. But that doesn't necessarily mean anything coming in that guy. I was just like, you know, I was just whatever. I went to open up my closet. And back then, Sergio Tikinis were really popular, like the track suits. So he's picking out a track suit.

with me. He goes, hey, wait it is. You're going to look good. I'm like, this guy's prepping me for, you know, I don't know for what. So I was like, can I just ask you what do you want for me? He's like, no, you know, I go to grab my gun. He goes, you're not going to need that. Now I'm even more worried. You know, I get in the car. I'm shitting pickles in the car, you know, these other two guys ain't saying shit to me, you know, and I'm just like sitting there in a passenger seat and I'm going, I know this guy got a gun to my back. You know, I, that's what I'm going through my, through my head. We get to the social club. He goes, open it up. I open it up. He's like,

yeah, take all the video cassette. I say, what? Now, he pulls the gate down from the inside. I'm like, fuck. That's a straight up, like, mob hit. I'm like, they're trying to muffle the sound, whatever. And I'm like grabbing the video cassettes, put him in garbage bags. Now I'm a couple of, you know, fall down.

I'm like trying to bend over, pick him up. They're all hovering over me like this and over here. I'm just like, yo, I go, I got to ask. Before I move anymore, what the fuck am I here for? Why am I bagging all these video cassettes? He goes, because you need to get rid of these video cassettes. This is going to be my social club from now on. You tell your boy in jail, I took the spot over.

If he doesn't like it, he'd come fucking see me when he gets out. I said, I don't give a shit. I just told to open up, let the social club run, let the video store on the side run. I said, I really don't give a rat's ass. This is not my business. And I'm just like, you want to give me a hand with this shit? He goes, oh, yeah, sure. Now they're helping me.

And he goes, hey, what are you so nervous about any which way? You were like sweating there for a minute. He had to know. He knew. Yeah, yeah. He was because he goes, he goes, would you do. think you were going to get whacked? I said, honestly, yeah. And he goes, hey, he thought he was going to get whacked. Typical mob scene type shit. It's insane. That's just like one of the

stories. I've had like five of those with other people. It's not, it's an uneasy feeling, you know? That's why I got the nickname Pedge two guns. I'd have two guns on me at all times. You know what I mean? So it'd be like, if I can't get this one, I get the one on my ankle. I just, I just didn't trust the situations I was in. And when you're in that, you know, I mean, you know, you've done crime. But My crime. I'm filling out paperwork, bro. Yeah, yeah. You're filling out paperwork, but mortgage brokers don't shoot each other.

Yeah, but see, like with these people, I just got so deep in that life. You know, you see that shooting in front of you. It's like watching a TV show, like watching Breaking Bad and the guy shoots the guy. You know, my son has asked me growing up. He goes, Dad, what does it like when you see somebody? Nothing. It's cold. It's like it doesn't, I go, I can walk over a body.

It could be my friend. It could be my friend for real. It could be my friend. He just got shot. And if it's me or him, and I have to high tail out of it because the cops are on the way, I'll be like, yo, nice knowing you. Boom, I'm out. I'll cry about later at the funeral.

So you're in your 20s. 20s, yeah. This is your 20s. 20s, yeah. And what's your legitimate? Because a lot of the guys, they have like, they'll have like a legitimate, like, they'll be like a butcher. But then at night they're pushing trucks.

I was, I was working in the maintenance field in the city where I told you before in the garment district. I was working there. That was a night job. It was perfect for me because I'd go in, punching at five. I'd leave at 11. I'd get to go to the social clubs and hang out until 4 or 5 in the morning.

And that's where you hobnob with everybody. That's where you meet everybody. You're playing cards. There's an Italian game called Scuba. It's in a Sicilian game. So you play that. I learned how to play that. Then we used to play blood,

which is kind of like a rummy like you play in jail. It's the same, same shit. And we would sit there and play and you'd wait for somebody to come in, you know, just for that one moment to rub elbows with a maid guy, to rub elbows with somebody

who's got a heist coming up or something. and they need an extra person or whatever it is. Or if somebody comes in and says, hey, you know, my security company works here and here. There's a jewelry store. Yeah, you get the gist now. So for me, it was a perfect opportunity to rub elbows at everybody.

So my legitimate thing was I was working in maintenance. And I kept that. It was good benefits. It was a union job. It was phenomenal, you know. But, you know, there was times where, you know, I could have made bail. I got cough for some, you know. It was a week, two weeks at the most that I was ever in.

Those two weeks were not fun. I mean, you know, Rikers Island, I'm pretty sure you heard stories about it. You know, it was insane. And, you know, it was run by the blacks and the Hispanics, and you had the Latin Kings and the Nettas and what. And you go in there thinking on the street Italian or something, you know, I go in there acting like I'm a cuisine. I'm like, hey, how you doing?

That doesn't fly when you get into jail. When you get in the jail, it's all like you can figure, they'll ask you where you from what's your hood and you say Bushwig or you say you know Ridgewood you know you say oh yeah you know this guy and that's what saves you'd be like oh I know Benji I know Casper I know this one they'd be like oh yeah they get right on the phone you know and they'd be like yo he's on the up and up then they come give you like a little package to you you know saying like they take care you know you know the deal you go to prison they've

the guys will come exactly so you know um then they'd be talking and finding out who you really are like what do you you know like what's your name in the street and these guys will come back oh he's good take care of him you know then they came and they asked me because I was there for two weeks like I said and like the fourth day they came and they asked me they're like you want to run with us so I thought they were going to like right away brand me or something like I didn't know what to expect you know and they were just like no you just run with us but if we tell you to jump you jump you don't ask you just go how high you know I was like all right I'll do what else I was with the nietas uh and they were always at war with Latin kings

So I was kind of nervous because to me it's It all looks the same It's this language is all the same But it's not You know Each click is different and whatever So what were you in there for two weeks for? Gun possession stolen car

And I don't know Whatever else they found some in the car Or something like that So they just drum up charges So the car wasn't stolen? Yeah it was but That's not a drummed up charge But it wasn't hot wired

I had keys you know So It's just like it's different it's different well it wasn't my eyes you know and I kept I and I actually beat the the the grand larceny auto because I was like it was my friend's car you know what's your friend's name and I'm like Joe Blow and they're like you know because I knew I knew to look for the registration and I would lie and say the owner of that car was drunk told me to take the car you're like you know drive him home take the car

and then use it for my whatever I need and then come back and leave it by his house or whatever and you know that worked once that worked twice you know wrong place wrong time or whatever scenario but the one time that I got a judge and she was ruthless she was just she didn't want to hear it right she's like so I look at your docket and I see that you got one GLA two GLAs now you're going to come with a third and it's the same story same song and dance she goes no you're guilty uh you know I got lucky my lawyer got me five years probation on that but dude five years probation, you got to be super careful. You get, you get jammed up on something. They're going to just throw both charges at you or whatever future charge you got. Most homeowners think they're

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that you're not already a victim started to at that time again go back to bosnia um because i mean why uh personal reasons let's just say shit happened in the streets and uh feds were coming around regular police are coming around asking questions knocking on doors you didn't want to be there i didn't want to be there i just didn't want to answer questions it was you know, one of those times where I didn't want to divulge any information because it would have put somebody away and I just figured if I'm not around

he could, you know, they'll find somebody else eventually to turn on him. I just, I don't believe in ratting. You know, yeah, explain to me when the feds came around looking for me, I didn't want to be there or there. I don't want to have that. I don't want to have a conversation with them. Yeah, I mean, it's it's, it's, of course, they were looking for me. Yeah. So, yeah. I mean, there was one, there was one and 90 I'm going to say 94 could be 93 there was a there was a there was a this guy a

Toma shine he was a Serbian gypsy he was from Vancouver I'm sorry from Montreal and it comes from a very well-known family drug dealers they dabbled in everything drugs fake currency those what do you call those You know, whatever. And he was doing cars. He was doing cars with this other guy that I was in his crew, but I walked away from that guy because the guy was a piece of shit. He stole all my contacts.

Every time I had a scam going, got in on my scam, stole my whole scam, got everybody that was working with me to go against me. You know, long story straight, a piece of shit. So he was working with that guy, and he would come to me in his Serbian social club, and he'd be like, hey, This guy's asking this much for cars. Can you get cheaper?

I said, first you made a deal with this guy. You stick with him. I don't want to be a part of this shit. I said, second, he's my arch nemesis. I don't want to deal with him. If I see him, it's high and goodbye, you know? I go, he's a scumbag. I got nothing nice to say about him.

So Frankie, again, was in this click. And I just remember one day Frankie pulling up with this guy, and Frankie just saying the words, I'm going to cut your head off. And I just looked, and I warned Toma, I said, now that the Italians are involved, I don't know how we would operate and how we would make somebody disappear.

I said, this guy just gave you green light. I don't know what you did to aggravate or piss them to fuck, but you need to square this shit off. Don't come around here because it could happen here right in front of us. Two days later, you know, I come home, whatever. And I see there's police down the block from my house, you know?

And I lived off a main avenue, like up the block off a main avenue. And down there was like, all warehouses, you know, a block down. So I see the cops like yellow taped the area off. I'm not thinking anything of it. Next day, my bell's ringing. Eight in the morning, bang, bang, bang, bang, you know, banging on the door.

I come out, I'm like, yeah, there's a Fed, there's cops, and just like, you so-and-so. I'm like, yeah, I'm Frederick Reichovic, yeah. He's like, where were you last night? I was like at the social club, this and that, you know a guy named Toma Shine. Yeah, here and there. They have black and white surveillance. They just whip it out and they show, well, you're hugging this guy and kissing him on the cheek. I go, I said I know him.

He goes, no, you're making it like you didn't know him. I'm like, no, I know him, you know. So were you with him last night? I was just like, no, two days ago. They pull out black and white photos out in front of that Serbian bar, you know? And I'm just like, okay, so what's the deal? He goes, you don't know that he's down the block? I said, what do you mean he's down the block?

They're pointing down the block, not as, you know, ambulances, you know the coroner's there you're putting it together now i just put it together and i was just like i lawyered up i was just like i ain't got nothing to say they're like you got nothing to say and you know they try to press you even after you say you got nothing to say and i just was like no i got nothing to say they just asked one other question was where's frankie fertilino so i don't know i really don't i go i see him here and there i don't know i'm not answering no more questions frankie ended up it was him he did it yeah you know but uh it was a drug deal gone bad supposedly i don't know we didn't know until

like a year after the details to come out. Frankie disappeared. Frankie said he went back to Sicily or something like that. But you went to... Well, after a few months, I took off, went to Bosnia. Okay. I mean, it was just, I figured, you know, I got connections over there

because when I was in my teens, I met a famous Serbian gangster who was at one time head of the Irish mob, the Westies, Basco Reduncich. So I got introduced to him in my early team, and he took a liking to me and I would see him in the Serbian social clubs

he was connected to John Gotti and the Gambinos so I started doing some things and I'd go by his social club in Manhattan and I start talking to him and you know I would frequent places that he would frequent just to rub elbows with him and I would be like hey you know did you hear of course he heard

in the Serbian community I was boosting cars I had this great scam on boosting cars And it became to the point where If everybody in the community knows that I'm doing this Well, the police are going to get wind of it soon Somebody's going to get pinched for something And they're going to give me up We were doing cars with keys

Yeah, I was going to say, what is this? Yeah, we were doing cars with keys We had a guy in motor vehicles So the guy in motor vehicles would give us a fake driver's license Then we also had another guy that was a great counterfeiter And he would make driver's licenses and he would make registrations and everything. So we came up, I came up with the idea.

If somebody was to go to a dealer, say Mercedes-Benz, because I had a friend, Serbian guy, who worked as a head mechanic at Porsche Audi in Long Island. So he told me, he goes, oh, yeah, the key costs like $95, all they asked for is a registration and a driver's license. My head is clicking. If we're boosting cars, high-end cars,

constantly from people's driveways, we have to get a slapjack to pull out, the ignition, you know, and put a screwdriver in there or put a pair of pliers and, you know, get it going, you know? I said, what if we got keys? Now, we're getting orders from people in the neighborhood like, oh, yo, I just smacked up my 560. I need, you know, parts. What color do you want? I get you the exact color. So with the key, you just walk over and just get in and drive away, like no problem. So we started getting everybody fake IDs and we would go and scope the aero out, get the VIN numbers, write them all down, go back and go to the guy in the

motor vehicles and say, can you give us a print out of this and this? The guy would, with the fake IDs, he would give us the name that we wanted. Once we got the registration, we knew who the owner was. We would take the owner's name, put it on that driver's license. They would never check to see how old you are. They would never check anything. As long as you got a nice suit on, we didn't would pay people. Like, hey, you want to make a quick $250, just go in there, give him this, give him this license, come take a picture at this guy's house. You know, guys were desperate, they would do it. At one point, we had 125 keys.

So, 125 keys, and we get $5,000 on the car. On the quick. On the quick. So it got to the point that everybody in the neighborhood knew about the scam. And because, you know, word them out, like one guy would say, hey, you know what? This guy, Pedge did this and this guy did that. And like I said, the guy, Bosco heard about me.

And he was like, yo, you're making money, hand over a fish. You're smart, bro. I respect that. So I would go Bosco at, in, 91, because he did a jury tampering case for John Gotti, he fled. He just took off. It wasn't really, you know, the mafia was, everybody was getting pinched. That was right before Gravana got pinched and all of that.

So Bosco left. He had a casino already in Serbia. He had a casino and a nightclub. So he was a Serbian underlord, you know, over there. He had his own crew. He was making hand over the fist. He was also involved in a little narco trafficking. So I went over there and I saw him.

He would put me on with other gangs and whatever. So while I was there, I was making a little money overseas. So that's like when the whole thing happened with that guy getting killed and I took off, I would go see Bosco and be like, yo, can you give me some? Can you throw me a bone? Of course. He'd be like, yeah, sure, boom. Go see this guy in Belgrade.

Go see this guy in Verschratz. Go see this guy in this other town. Man, I'd make a little coin. My family didn't like it because there's a thing like when I walk in a room, I have a typical European swag of a gangster or a criminal or a ex-boxer or, you know, karate dude. Everybody says it, you know, like I don't walk like regular guys. When I walk in, I walk in like I own the place. So Bosco took that to his advantage.

So when I got over there, the guys in the street that were walking saw me walk and they were just right away like not questioning me. They were just like you look like you could take care of yourself. I maybe got into two fights when I was back home, you know. And basically I did my dirty. pool and I was doing MMA before MMA was big. Like I did Hopkito, I did Muay Thai, I did

Jiu-Jitsu. I was doing it there was no UFC back then. The UFC was, I think it was the early 90s where they would put up people from different genres like you know they would put a Kung Fu guy versus a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu guy. It was a shit show. UFC wasn't what it is

today. But yeah so I would do that and I'd make a few dollars while I was there. And then I'd come back and get my feet wet again here. And the job was always waiting for me. It was a union job. They couldn't fire me. As long as my job was done, I could take a leave of absence at will. So, you know, once you get into the union, you could do stuff like that. So the job was my buffer. You know, it kept a thousand dollars a week in my pocket, you know, helped out my mom with the rent and whatever. But I was always trying to make some kind of a hustle. I got off on it. Like honestly,

like, you know, being entrepreneurial as a kid, you know, I had like three, four different businesses, you know, and got to the point where I wasn't doing anything. Like, I had the guy tinting my windows etching my windows for me and I would just take the money. I wasn't even DJing anymore. I would just be like, send people out to DJ parties and stuff and I would be taking money. And it was, when I did a scam or a hustle or something and I made some money, I never did it too long. Something was always in my gut telling me after like six months, eight months like you're playing this out you need to back the fuck up right there's guys that still do the same hustle like you were doing your hustle and people just like a comfort like yeah

i could do this i never got comfortable like six months eight months that was i did cigarettes when cigarettes were like they were taxing the shit out of them in new york and juliani was like oh you know you can't buy you can't go to the indian reservations no more because i was going to the indian reservations and buying 500 cartons at a clip i would send four guys with many with vans and minivans and be like here's the money right Go buy 500 cartons, you know. And then he made a law, you can't buy anything over 300. So I'd be like going in by 299, you know.

And then I had guys going to Virginia, same shit, bringing them in, 299. If they get caught going over the bridge, well, it's not a federal offense. You're not, you know, traffic in the cigarettes, you know. You're not trying to avoid the tax thing. It's 299, you know. But, yeah, I did a lot of, a lot of crimes, a lot of things. Do I have regrets? Yes and no.

Yes and no. I mean, I have regrets for the things I got caught. I was stupid. There's a lot of things I don't have regrets. I just, you know, I kick back, have a few beers with my friends, and we relive these times. And I'm like, you remember that? And they're like, yeah, you were the shit, you know.

It's something, I mean, being 54 years old now, it's like, it's something to look back on. I wouldn't want my kid doing any of it. this shit, honestly. Like, that's the reason I came to Florida. Because, you know, I was living in Jersey and then, like, getting divorced, it was just the shit show. I had to go back in the street. And I was out of the life for a bit. I had to go back into the street to make a hustle because, you know, I didn't know what else to do. You know, I went back to Queens and I was like, right back in the street, like tell my son, stay with Grandma, I'll be right back. I come back

with like two, three thousand. Like, I was just hustling again. And I got told, get the out of here like you what are you doing you've been clean all this time get out i had people that liked me you know but it was uh it's gonna go bad eventually they it's just a matter of time oh i'd be honest with you back in the day was golden because there was no cameras they couldn't they couldn't tap into the ATM cameras nobody had cell phones there wasn't the iphone where you're committing a crime you got a gun to somebody said and they could take a picture or you whack somebody there's surveillance there's a freaking ring camera on somebody's house today they will catch you quick

yeah you know I mean you have to be super slick and you got to come up with something like you know something that you're gonna bang out some money but don't get greedy don't go banging out a lot like you did well I was gonna say was it's it's funny because I was thinking this when you were talking it's like you're you know you've got your regular job but you're also doing stuff on the side

always like you don't always like to me I've got two three hundred thousand dollars in the bank i'm still flipping properties i'm still buying properties renovating them and selling them and it's like that's your thing that's your gig but it's like but it's not even a scam it's just because i i always have to be doing like i can't imagine like working 40 hours a week and that's it like what do you mean what else do you do yeah you always got to be on a move hang out with the with your kids and you do this yeah family and i'd be like i like i could

but i could buy this house for 50 grand and i get this you know on the side and that I can, you know, which is probably why, you know, most of my family doesn't talk to me. But that's the point, but, you know, the point is that, you know, I had that, you know, you've got that hustle drive where you want to have that hustle drive. Yeah. Coming here, the first two years, I was always on the hustle. Like, you know, I would, I would like to look at a dollar and see 10. You know what I mean? So like, but I don't know anybody here. I don't know anybody here. There's nobody here that, like, there's not a go-to guy. I was the go-to guy in New York. You needed a car. You came to me. I knew chop shops. I knew, you know, junkyards. I knew everybody for everything. I knew who can smelt gold down, who could cut diamonds. I knew everybody for everything. I was the go-to guy. That was my thing. I loved it. When I went somewhere and somebody said, hey, what you got going on? And I'm like, well, what do you need? Hey, man, we just got a score, you know, and they show me a diamond ring. And I'm like, oh, that's a nice rock.

We can cut this into like five rocks. So I'd be like, let me take it to my guy. And, you know, you got to trust me now. So I go to my guy. My guy goes, dude, I'll give you $20,000 for it right now. I call him up and be like, yo, my bad. He's only going to give you 15. I say, you know, my cut.

I mean, okay, guys, I shouldn't be saying this now because guys are going to be looking back and be like, what a scumb bag, you know. But, you know, that's the part of the game, you know. I would never take anybody with me to go to my connect. Right. Because I've gotten scumbagged in the past. I've got people that have taken me for a ride and went undercut me and went straight, you know. But, I mean, I've dabbled in everything.

I've dabbled in the city. Most of the guys that I dabbled with, now they're all legit, you know. They all got legit, what do you call it, smoke shops or whatever in the city. So they're all making hand over fist because it's all legal in New York. I don't know why anybody would be like doing. doing illegal now like do you ever have anybody um reach out to you and say hey i got this thing i need you to and i'll be honest in the beginning yeah um it was like you know favors would get called and like hey pedd you know uh you got to connect for this and it'd be like yeah and i'd be like my head

would just the way you said in one of your podcasts like i'd be like wow my head would be like just figuring how i can make money book club on monday gym on tuesday Date night on Wednesday Out on the town on Thursday Quiet night in on Friday It's good to have a routine And it's good for your eyes too Because with regular comprehensive eye exams at Specsavers

You'll know just how healthy they are Visit Spexsavers.cavers.cai to book your next eye exam Eye exams provided by independent optometrists You know like it was just the excitement of it like all over again I get all tingly. But I'd have to pull the reins back, look at my kid, and be like, you know, I'm 50-some years old. I could go away for a long time.

I mean, I could do the favor. So what I would end up doing is I'd reach out to my guy and I would just remove myself from the situation. You know, from that equation, I would remove myself. So I would tell my guy, look, you want to bless me? You want to send me a little something some from my kid? I appreciate it. If not, I'm out.

You could have my connect. He's going to call you. Just call him on a burner and do what you need to do. And how is it? And once I started getting into that habit, it was easier to just separate myself from that life. Right. And eventually, most of those guys get pinched anyway.

So they're not reaching out to you as much as time goes on. So you get to remove yourself from this situation. But it's also, there's a saying in Serbia, a face not seen is a face forgotten. So you're not in that life. You're not rubbing elbows with these. people on a regular basis you're not playing cards with them they don't see you in the hood anymore you're a face forgotten so you know like i'd reach out to a couple of guys hey what's up they wouldn't

have time for me yeah they'd be like oh you know i'm doing something i'll hit you up later never hit me up so it it's it kind of sucks but then i have all these stories i have all this you know it's for the batter it no it really is it really is because my kid um once we move back to queens and my son started to literally see what you're it was like my son saw when we used to go see grandma people say hey pedge how you doing this and that my son got to see that a few guys would come up and put a 50 on them and say hey good luck kid this is for you you know like a little blessing but once we had to go back to cleans and i'd go to like pizzerias and i would be ordering calamar clams dis calzones nothing everything to be on the cuff

they would never charge me like oh it's good pej don't worry about i were like sixty-sevity dollars with her food oh pedge don't worry about it's okay i'd blow red lights cops will pull me over I'd have like 18 PBA cards. I'd be like, here you go. Oh, yeah, I know who you run away. They'd let me go. They'd be like, just, you know, don't go so fast. You know, don't go through the red light like that.

Don't just blow it. My son saw this, and he thought it was, he thought it was Grand Theft Auto. He thought it was Nico Bellich. Nico Belich is a Serbian guy from Bosnia. So my son is like playing Grand Theft Auto going, Dad, are you this guy in a video game? And I'm like, what do you say to the kid?

I'm just like, you know, and that just so happens. One day there's a block party down a block from the house and an Italian guy turns the corner and I've been telling my kid all these stories like you know about me and my past and everything he's heard me talking to other people and there was this guy Joe

he was supposed to clip me and he was supposed to clip me because this guy said Pedge this and this and he lied and this guy just came he was one of those shooter guys you know and he just came and he came into my bar

and I see him with the gun I'm all like yo Joe what are you doing here and he's just like Pedge I don't know I'm hearing words you know this guy said this and this I was like you believe that He goes, no, but I was told to come in.

I was like, yo, do what you got to do? Because this is bullshit. This guy's lying. He's like, that's what I said. So we ended up having to sit down about that. But this guy came to whack me, came to clip me. So I told my son about this. This guy turns the corner.

And then my son turns around. And this guy's talking to him going, this is your little man. Oh, my God. Meek. Yeah, you know, starts hugging my kid. He goes, your father's a man of respect. He's a good man. You know, look up to him, you know.

And he gives him a little money. He goes, hey, good senior. Petch kissing me on a cheek takes off. I go to my son Marco. I go, hey, see that guy? He goes, yeah. That's the guy who tried to kill me. My son couldn't fathom why I was kissing this guy on a cheek. And I said, business is business. This is the life. Now are you so happy about thinking that I'm Nico Bellich from Grand Theft Auto? And then my son was like, no. I said, I have to look over my shoulder. I said, Marco, I'm going to be honest with you. We need to leave. We need to get the out of here. Pick a state. Of course, my son is going to pick

Florida because we'd come here three times a year. You know, it was me and him. It wasn't me and my ex-wife. Yeah, Disney. We'd go to Tampa. We'd go to the zoo. You know, we would do everything. We'd go to Space Center. You know, it was always the same thing. And I bought a condo on C.S. The Key. So my condo is my base operations. Then I'd come and hang out in Tampa by my godfather's house. And then I'd rent a hotel in Orlando and I'd go and spend five days there and hit everything. Hit Hollywood Studios. Hit, you know, hit Disney. My son loved it here. And he goes, Florida. It's like, I hate Florida.

I said, but for you, you know, my parents came to the United States for a better life. I said, for you, I'll do it. Plus, I don't want you walking in my footsteps at all. And it was the hardest thing I used to sit here and curse Florida. I used to be like, I hate it here because, you know, going from that atmosphere where you know everybody, you were a wanted guy. Everybody loved you. Everybody feared you. You know, I don't have that here.

You know, I walked down the street, I'm nobody. Right. First year I was here, Skinhead, I can try the step to me. Literally in the mall. Step to me, said some shit. It called me like a juice head or something. And I was like a little bit more jacked up than I am now. And I turned around, I was like, who the fuck you think you're talking to?

The guy goes, oh, what are you going to do about it? He's got a Nazi swastika here. He's got, like, tatted up. He's got at least like seven inches on me, 30 pounds on me. And I'm just like, yo, I'm going to warn you right now. I know MMA. Second, I don't think you know who the fuck I am. And he's just like pulls out a knife.

I was just like, like he pulled out of a knife. And I was just like, yo, for real? And I just go to swing. on him, he starts running. His wife pulls out a box cutter, so it's like swiping at my girlfriend. My girlfriend's taking a bag and she's just hit her with a Michael Coors bag. Bang, bang. I'm flying down the escalator. Yo, this is in the middle of the mall. And I'm just going like this. Now I'm in Florida. I said, call the cops. I say because I'm going to this guy. Like call the cops before I'm a guy. I chase him out into the parking lot. Cops are there, six squad cars.

And make a long story short, the cops are yelling at me. Because I'm going, yeah. you know what if you want to come see me i work out of uh la fitness on 580 come see me you the cops going shut the up because if this guy slips in a shower and bumps his head and dies we're coming for you and i'm just like all right and my son is watching us like nothing you know and my my girl keep trying to get in between and i just my girl's a little little short little stubby little girl man's tough i pushed her i flung her into macy's like my son was just like shaking his head going don't fuck with my dad my dad will fling you like you know but yeah i got i got tested when i was first here it is what it is i mean now i've learned to control my temper you know it's like

here you'll never see that guy again no new york you might bump into him five times the next you will yeah next time i got to take care of them for real like i got to bat him them shoot him do something but yeah i mean and now i carry a gun legit because you know my record's expunged and i'm all legit now and you know it's funny i used to pull out that gun so quick man i don't even pull that shit out now like for real It's like, I warn the person, like, yo, back the, I don't want, I don't want any problems. Like, I had a few altercations in the gym where I'm like, yo, for real, I grab a dumbbell and crack you in the head. Like, do you know who I am?

And I, here I am saying this, like, do you know who I am? I'm like, I'm nobody. Like, I was that person. Right. I just need to like, yo, let's go outside and take care of it. I'll show you who I am. Now it's like, I just kind of like ignore shit. Like, you know, I go to the gym.

I get my, you know, I get my swell on. My son works out with me. You know, it is what it is. I got some haters that talk some shit. shit that I'm on juice. Like, for real, dude, if I was on juice, you don't think I'd be like 19, 20-inch on, I'm like, for real, like, it's insane, bro. I was going to say, you're not.

I mean, I'm not. This is only 17.5 inch arms, but I was way bigger before. Bro, I take tests. I mean, you know, got it from the doctor you go in. They're like, I test your shit, and they're like, here, let me give you something. Yeah. You get older and they'll, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're an older guy now. I am. You're my age. I was born in 69. Yeah. too, 69, bro. Listen, everything's not. You go to the gym and I hurt for four days afterwards.

Oh, no. I used to be able to train like so intense. I cannot train intense. I've had four surgeries back to bag. I've torn ligaments. I've torn like the tricep tendon. This was a bad surgery here in Florida. I had to get surgery four times.

The guy screwed me up. The first time I went to another doctor. That guy screwed me up twice. Put in a screw. The screw was popping out of my skin. So I went to a guy in Tampa that does Navy SEAL. This guy goes, yo, listen,

he goes, I'm going to cut you. I'll put a cadaver, tendon in there. I'll stretch it out, all of this. He goes, you won't be 100%, but you'll be 75 to 80. I'm 75 to 80.

I am. But I can't train intense. I used to be able to do like 120 pound dumbbells. Fuck, if I do 70s, and I do 70s for reps, I do like 35, 40 reps, sets of four, you know? My son's pretty jacked up too,

and everybody in the gym was saying shit, like, I got my son on juice, and I'm like, I don't. My son is stockier than me. Like when I was my son's age I was a crackhead I was like so skinny My son

Very stocky He takes after his mom Very stocky Five seven He's kind of like you're built You know But he just He works out

That's all he does Comes with me Does the routine I wish I was five seven Aren't you not five seven No I'm like five six Oh one inch I really

It means a lot Put lifts in your shoes Man I mean that one in That's with the lifts You said do I regrets Every once in a while You'll talk to somebody

and they're like, you heard, well, no, because it makes me the person I am today. Bro, come on, man. I did 13 years. I'm going to tell you a quick story. Sorry to cut you off. I got a big regret. One regret I got, I shot a dude, all right? And my son was just born.

And, you know, after my son coming into life, you know, this was eating at me. This one specific guy was, he didn't have it coming to him. I wasn't drunk. It was over a card game. I just didn't like the way he was shuffling the cards. He was doing this the whole time. I was like, you're making me nervous. Stop doing that.

Then he would, like, throw the cards and give me a new deck. This went on for like three hours, and I just, boom, you know, did what I had to do. I went to go see my priest. I'm very kind of religious, if you can believe that. But I went to go see the priest, and I told the priest that said, you know, in our church, I'm serving an Orthodox. So you got 2,000 parishioners, and then the priest goes, does anybody want to, you know, confess? You have to go in front of everybody.

He pulls up the cape, puts the cape over, and you tell him what you do. did wrong. So I said, I shot a guy. Yo, he jerked the cape like this. He went like that. He looked at everybody like guilt on his face. Like he did it. Now everybody's looking at me going, they know who the guy I am. And they're like, oh, what did he do wrong now? What is he trying to be like fucking, you know, forgiven about? Now everybody's like wondering, whispering, you know, the priest goes, I want you to stay after mass. I want to talk to you. All right. But before you leave, go put money on this icon, pray to this icon. Give me 10 Hail Mary's. Give me 11 our fathers, you know, I went there, I did all of that, I waited.

Yo, he chewed my ear off. And he goes, you know what? You want to make this right with God? You really want to be forgiven? I said, yeah. I go, you know me. I don't have a care in the world. I don't care that I stole cars. I don't care that. I don't give a shit that I shot other guys and he ass. He goes, but this guy's sticking out to you. Yeah. Go find him. Go knock on his door. Ask for forgiveness. I said, are you nuts? I go, this guy's probably a made guy in the Gambinos now. He goes, you got to do it. I said, that's poking the bear the wrong way. I may not come out of this. He goes, that's the only way God will forgive you. Thought about it for a week. Found him. Went to Long Island. Went to this big ass house. I'm like, this has got a Mercedes

in the driveway. I'm like, this motherfucker's going to, he's going to cap me right here. Knock on the door, ring the bell, knock on the door. He opens, he comes like limping. Like, you know, I see him through the thing. How long had it been? Um, um, 15 years. 13, 15 years. 13, 15 years. Yeah. That's not good. I hit him bad. I hit him bad. so I mean I heard in the street that like he's one leg is shorter than the other so make a long story short like I always do but he opens the door his face just you know dropped he's the fuck you want I said yo um this has been sitting on my conscience it's been eating at me I did you wrong he just went spat I mean lugy it was like right in my eye I was like I got to get an AIDS test after this they're like he did that And he goes, you got a lot of bulls coming to my house. You know who to how I am?

I said, well, if you were really somebody, I go, I wouldn't be standing here. I said, I just wanted to. And he just slams the door. And I was just like, I'm going to need to go see my guy Bobby glasses about this because this could end up being really bad. And I poked this bear, you know. And I came back. I went to go see Bobby, sat down with Bobby.

He was a big guy in the Gambino's Bobby Glasses. And Bobby was like, I'm going to reach out. I'm going to see if this guy wants to make a beat. on this, you know. He goes, it's been so long ago, you know. I said, but is he somebody? He goes, he's an associate. He makes money, but he was really scared of me, you know, and I heard that he tried to get people to like off me, not to pay money, but like he was trying to pit people against me like, oh, Pedge is this, Pedge is that. Yeah, Pedge shot me, but, you know, whatever the story may be. And nothing ever, you know, came to fruitation for him.

And Bobby said, he's not going to bother you no more. He said it took a lot of balls for you to come there, but he doesn't forgive you. I said, but I got a kid now. I'm like looking over my shoulder. He goes, but why'd you go over there and poke that bear? I said, my priest told me, oh, you got a conscious now. I said, you know, I don't have to explain it. Like I, like I said, I'd done a lot of shit wrong. And maybe because I was drunk or I was high or whatever the story maybe, I have no regrets. This one dude, it ate at me. It ate at me and ate at me. And I looked at my kid. And that's the real reason why I pulled out of that life. I had a of money on the street. I was doing a couple of scams. I did a couple of credit card things. I was

going to AC banging out cards. I went to Vegas. I got jammed up there. But I was just like, you know what? I'm going to stay with my kid. And I raised my kid. My ex-wife was a horrible person. She got up after 30 days and went back to work. So I basically raised, I was this kid's mother and father. And, you know, having a kid with colic for three months crying on you, you know, and the only way they could sleep is hearing your heartbeat, that just ate me to f*** up. If you sleep hot at night, you know how disruptive that can be.

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Even better, our listeners can get 50% off site wide for a limited time. Just visit ghostbed.com slash Cox and use the code Cox at checkout. Again, that's ghostbed.com slash Cox with the code Cox at the checkout to save a whopping 50% off site wide. You know, like, it was just like, I don't want this kid growing up like I grew up. Right. I don't want this kid walking in my footsteps. I don't want him to look up to me because I'm a gangster. I want him to look up to me because he looks up to me.

And he changed my life. And then that's why I said, let me get a house in Jersey. Let me move out of the neighborhood because I was told by Bobby Glasses, leave. If you leave this neighborhood, it's in your rear view. The further you can get away, the better. So I was 45 minutes to an hour away. You know, in the beginning, you come back to the neighborhood constantly. But if you've got to keep driving, going into midtown traffic and all,

Well, like you said, you're not around, so you stop being involved in all that stuff. Exactly. Yeah, I mean, I had a couple of spots. You know, I was selling me through barbershops. So I would just go and collect. After a while, I didn't even go collect. I had my mom collect. So I would be like, yo mom just, you know, my mom was like, what?

The guy's going to come and give you an envelope. Count the money. She called me on and be like, there's like 5,800 in one envelope and there's like 10,200. What are you doing? And I'd be like, shut the fuck up. Take a hundred for yourself, you know, for counting and take for groceries or whatever. But, you know, I tried to, she was living in my building. It was rent-free.

Right. But, you know, once I was out there and I, you know, teaching my son how to play sports, I had a big acre of land, big backyard, trampoline, me and him would, it was just the best times of my life, you know. Right. And that was it. I stopped going. I got rid of the spot, sold them to some competitor. I was like, take them over, give me this much, you know, give me my tax and that's it.

I'm out, you know. And I just didn't do anything. But when I got divorced, I got cancer, colon cancer, guy. Yeah, I got diagnosed with stage two twice. I got a problem with polyps. They told me I got like fertile land inside of me, like where the polyps just grow. I'm a big meat eater. You know, I eat a lot of meat.

And Serbians eat, a lot of pork, a lot of beef, you know, just a lot of meat in general. And first time, stage two, they pulled it out. Second time, stage two, same place. It was as big as my pinky. like that and he goes you know you need to do something about this get change a diet so i went from like 255 big as a brick shit house and then i went down like 220 just by dieting just like start eating more vegetables salads stay away from the red meat look at your face is like salads like you're disgusted i just look at salad and i get diarrhea looking at it for real and that's all it does is

it just cleaned you to out it's like i like a solid shit so i like to eat a two pound steak you know But, yeah, so I didn't go from my colonoscopy. I usually go once a year, once every 18 months. Came to Florida, my kid. We sold the condo, and she has the key. Something was telling me I need to get rid of it because I kind of smelt my ex-wife. There was something brewing.

I caught a cheating. So I got rid of it just in the nick of time. Did a little under the table jam with a guy, you know. So she don't know about that you, bitch. And, yeah, so, yeah. And then I went to the doctor Like I was feeling something was off Like I don't know they say that you know when you get the big C you know whatever

Right Just feeling something was off Wasn't feeling right I went to the doctor They did the colonoscopy His face was a little different Like usually when I wake up after colonoscopy Usually zips his pants and goes

Hey that was fun You know great doctor you know This time there was no zipping up the pants There was no joking with him you know And I was just like yo what's up You know And he goes come to my office So I leave that room.

I go to the office. He goes, I don't like the way it looks. He goes, but it looks like stage three. I go, what? He goes, it's a pro-plastic tumor, meaning it's like a mushroom. He goes, usually tumors grow like a nub. He goes, and it spreads. He goes, yours grew a neck, and the thing just blossomed like a mushroom.

I said, and he goes, I got most of it out, and I did some biopsies around, but I like to see you in three months. I want to go back in. If not, we're going to have to cut you surgically. move like eight inches of your intestine yeah so that's a great way to go home with this so now i'm sweating the biopsy he calls me and he goes i was right he goes stage three so go what do we do he goes i want you to come in a little sooner than this and i went in again put me under i was bleeding how much he was biopsying me and whatever but he kept pulling and pulling he was right next to my appendix and he was pulling and pulling he was i pulled so much he

He goes, you're bleeding, but I got it. He goes, we're going to buy, obviously, those 30 pieces. Came back, gone. I mean, it's there, but it's malignant. He got it. Luckily, the way it grows, the blood is given the top of it, you know, to survive, the blood. That was the cancerous part. It didn't go and start to spread yet, because it usually goes that way.

And that's what he was telling me. So he goes, I need you to come every three months, but I want to send you for radiation therapy. I was just going to say, do you have to take chemo or anything after that? Yeah, they send. me, I went to this place in Jersey, St. Joseph's. It's a cancer place. And I went there alone, no ex-wife. She didn't come with me. My son was devastated because, you know, I had to tell my son because, you know, what do you do? You know, you got the apple of your eye here. You know what I'm

saying? You got this new life. And I was just like, just, I was bewildered. I was shocked. I didn't know what the, I didn't know if I was going to live. And I didn't want my son see me wasting away from being this big powerhouse to be in, you know, right, you know, AIDS patient. So, um, I don't know. It's just really, I'm just holding it back. It was just really devastating for me, all right? And, um, I went through six sessions of chemo.

They would give me an injection. They would put this machine on me. It's kind of like a x-ray machine and it would thump and whatever for like 15 minutes. Um, and I had to put this, you know, the thing in my vein. and started getting this metal taste after the second, third. By the fourth, I was like, that's all I tasted was metal. I had no, I didn't have a taste for food because everything tastes like tinfoil, everything. Even if I wanted to like drink chocolate milk, didn't taste like chocolate milk.

It tastes like metal and something thick, you know. And I went in for another colonoscopy. They did an oncology tests. They said there's nothing in my bloodstream. There's no markers. There's no nothing. But I got to go constantly every six to eight months. to get out of the colonoscopy to make sure

there's no polyps growing or whatever and at the same time I find out my ex is cheating so I kind of flipped out and I'm going to leave that at that because that kind of opened up a can of worms about my past and I kind of did some stupid shit how long was this? 2014 okay

actually 2013 is when it all started happening 2014 it was just I already confronted her in 2013 and I said you know I want you found I want you to get the out of here And she was begging me, like, you know, for my son, whatever. And I didn't want my kid growing up the way I grew up in a divorce house. And I said, look, I could forgive you, but I can't forget. I said, but this motherfucker that you cheated, I'm going to put them in the early retirement.

I'm going to take care of him. She's like, no, this, that, dad, you know. And she said she was going to try. You don't forgive people when they do some shit like that. When they do you dirty like that, walk away. Right. Because once they do it dirty and they see that they got away with it and you forgave them, They'll do it again.

Little in six months she was doing it again. Where I was putting spy gadgets in her car and microphones, key loggers. I was living just to catch her. And when I caught her, I was just, it was constantly like just us bickering. And then she was just yelling at, you know, at me in front of my son and spitting on me. And I was just like, like, do I now beat the shit out of her in front of my kid? Then she tried to throw cases on me. She'd call the cops and be like, he hit me.

She had a mark here. And the cop who was like, well, how to fuck is that mark? from him hitting you and I go yo that's a defensive wound because I was grabbing like this while she was clocking me in the face look at my face and my son is right there my son's going yeah my mommy hit my daddy but the cops motherfuckers the next morning they waited and they waited they I went to go take my son to school and they just stormed me in this little town of 2,000 people the whole police force for that town stormed me and the cop that arrested me was like get against the car and I did

I didn't resist but the other cop was talking to my son and like literally going your daddy's a bad man he's gonna go to jail how do you talk to a little nine 10 year old like that right i lost my shit i just like i don't know how i wrestled my hand away jumped over the hood sort of jumping on this cop they were pulling me off they arrest me i'm screaming you don't know who the f*** i am like you know like you you know meanwhile the cop's already googling my name and he goes your name keeps coming up patch tattoos and this and you ran with the gianini crew you ran with this one you ran with that one how come you don't have an arrest record

I was like my friend good lawyers you know and I'm like boasting I'm sitting there in lock up boasting to this guy and long story short I spent some time in there she didn't want to bail me to fuck out and my son was begging and begging days of begging please mommy take my money

from the bank we had a little account for him set up and she was like no no no and he was begging and I said how could you make this kid cry just bail me out I'll go with Queens I'll go live with my mom So she bails me out Now child welfare services get involved Because we did this in front of our kid

Right And we got them coming to the house saying I can't be in the house I have to have a police escort in and out So I go okay fine So I go grab my kid the cop goes No the kid stays here I said no I said kid goes with me

My ex goes yeah the kid has to go with him Because that kid won't stay with me I didn't raise him She said that on record in front of child welfare services Right So then we had to come to an agreement where we went to counseling. That didn't do shit, you know. It's just, it's beyond repairable now.

It's just done. Yeah, the animosities. Oh, dude, there was two ships passing in and I saying, you to each other. You know, like, you know, like Pirates of the Caribbean. You, fuck you, fuck you, just passing each other. You know, I don't even like talking about it because it was such a horrendous period. And my son hates his mother and hates all that shit that she did and put, you know,

I was trying to do an opposite and raise him a different way. And it just looks like it. The ball rolled. in that circle that I was raised in. I gave up. Let the bank take the house. Didn't pay a mortgage. You didn't pay jack shit.

She tried to be friendly, which was bewildering to me. Like, hey, give me a kiss like to see the kid. I'm just like, yo, like, don't come kiss me. Like, what do you? God knows what your mouth has been, you know? And she's just like, well, you know, I'm trying to be cordial in front of the kid.

I go, you didn't think about that where you were spitting on me and yelling and saying I'm a thief. I'm a bum. I'm a, you know, I'm a gangster. I said, you didn't think about that then, right? And she's just like, you know, whatever it was, I went back to Queens, and she knew that when I was in Queens, she was powerless. She'd come by the house to see the kid. The kid wouldn't want to see her.

You know, Marco, my son would just be like, I don't want to talk to mom. And I'd be like, you have to. And she'd be like getting all tizzy. And I'd be like, you know where you are, right? I was like, I make one phone call. It's done for you. And then one of my friends happened, this gangster drove by. He hates her.

He drove by. and Johnny DeSantis, he drives by. My cell phone rings and I'm like, hey, what's up, Johnny? And he's just like, was that your ex? He said, why is she talking to you in front of your house? And I'm like, Johnny, I don't know. She wants to see the kid for her.

She lost privileges to Marco. If I turn this Corvette around, I'm like, okay. You know, that's how it was, you know? So, you know, for that one year, I was doing what I was doing. But I was, like I said, six months and I was just like, I have to get out of Dodge. I can't do this. And then we came here.

I met a girl in the process, which I didn't want to meet nobody. I'm sitting in front of the school where I'm picking up my son. This is up there? Up there in Queens, yeah. And I'm talking to this other Serbian girl, Serbian gypsy girl, and here comes my now girlfriend. She walks in front. I kind of like cock block her, you know, to talk to this other girl. And she goes, look at you.

And I'm like, what do you want? And she's like, who the fuck you think you are? And I'm like, you don't know who the fuck I am. This one's going, he's pedged, patch tattoos. Everybody knows him, you know. him like you know I was like you know and the next the next day this girl goes hey she's interested in you I was like she was cursing me out of she interested in me you know and we started talking on the phone and it was one of those we got on the phone we couldn't get off right and she'd come by my

house she had a problem she was still with her ex-husband and I was like you need to get rid of your man I can't I can't do it I'm not a you know a person to break up a marriage you know you got to think about your kid first I'm thinking about my kid she just came around as a friend, came around as a friend, and she finally tried to get rid of him, and we hooked up. Kick any asses that I'm friends with her family, like me and her dad go back in the day. She's 36 years old, so she's way younger than me. So me and her dad go way back.

So there's kind of an embarrassment coming into the house as now, you know, her boyfriend, you know, because I'm the same age as their mom. So it's just kind of like, you know, a really awkward situation, but they accepted me. they're great people, you know. And I'm with her, and she stood by me all this time. She knows my past. She knows who I was and what I'm about. And she still knows that I'm capable of going to an extreme.

Like if somebody touches my family, like God forbid somebody touches my son, I don't, I'd go to prison. That's a given. That's a given. You know what I mean? But I don't stick up for my friends no more like I used to. I've taken bullets for my friends. I've been shot. I've been, I got jigged over here with a bottle of corona.

Oh, I got something in the back and the kidney. it's I mean I got in crack with a bat in a bar fight we get outside this guy just pulls out a bat I turn around bang right split my wig

I just laid on the floor I saw stars I couldn't get up and I just see the guy going to hit me again and my friend just comes over boom shoots him right in the shoulder the guy goes down

I grabbed the bat you want to hit me with a bat you know there's stories I mean I got tons of stories but I'm saving a lot of my stories for my book but I gave you some really gisty stories

you know I mean what Are you, have you completed? No, I've always started to write, and it's like I've been reading up that when you want to write a book, you need to every day set aside half an hour to one hour. You need to write regardless and you need to be relentless about this. And no matter what the ideas are, just jot them down, jot them down, jot them down.

My girlfriend goes, why don't you do that chat, whatever AI thing? Yeah. And I said, because it's not going to sound like me. I'm going to tell it to write about me and give it a couple of stories and it's going to make me out to be like some Harvard you know well and it also sounds it just sounds fake well it generalizes yeah it gives very general they don't exactly know what exactly so um punch has been pushing um and i was just like you know what i'm gonna because he when he heard my podcast he goes man he goes the stories you tell remind me a shit and you planted the flag and you know he goes

you read my book i'm like yeah i read your book i read twice back to back you know stealing manhattan awesome book get your book now but yeah i mean um Have you written an outline? You know, I've started. This is gotten worse and worse. I have a spiral notebook where I started doing it, and I get sidetracked. I started doing themes for the podcast, because I want to do a podcast with my son. And I start writing ideas, and I do these things where I do imitations.

I do jokes. It gets stuck on one imitation. I'll do it for like two weeks. Like I walked around a house like two months ago doing Bain. You know, we watched Dark Night. And I'm just walking around the house going, I'm like, you know, Gotham City, you know. And then my son would be like, can you shut up?

Now my new thing is, since this thing is going on in Israel, every time I hear Hezbollah, I go Hezbollah, you know, and it's just, I go through the house, and my son is just like, oh, this is annoying. To the point that everybody doesn't laugh anymore, they're just like, can you bury it? So that's when I bury it, and I go work on my next, you know, imitation. So I was doing that.

But I have about 300 pages that I did write. I just have to make sense of them, because there's days where I write eloquent. My ideas come out so perfect. They're run-on sentences. You need, you know, I need to, you know, go over it. But then there's, like, quick story. Stalking to a guy, Mark Terra Grosso, he was from my past.

He did nine years. He was involved with this kind of thing with Frankie, where, you know, they came to him while he was locked up and they said, hey, we're going to put you on this. You were there, even though you weren't there. You knew about it. Like, you premeditated it. You knew it. So we're going to throw that predicate on you.

and you're going to get hit with 20 years. He didn't even get a chance to finish his nine years. So he was just like, what do you want me to say? What exactly happened? He said what he had to say. They released him. Frankie gets pinched. So Mark went and did a podcast, and Mark was mentioning me.

And he was saying some stories. I literally forgot that I got high with Robert Downey Jr. Right. Totally forgot. We were in the Hamptons. We drove up there, like four or five of us. And Robert Downey Jr. is a little VIP thing. We're drinking and we're like,

we take a picture with you and he happens to notice that I'm doing right you know this he's like hey I'm like yeah I'm like do you have I'm like yeah sure let's go to the bathroom go to the bathroom we made a deal that night he goes well how much do you have and I said well I have this much he goes oh shit you're going to be with me all night so hanging out with him getting high he's got an open bar tab right he lets us go back to his house that he rented in the hamptons he leaves at 11 o'clock in the morning because he's got to fly out to California we're still in his freaking house. Like the guy's like, oh, you can stay as long as you want. I forgot that story because I was in a high drunk stupor. Mark brings it up and I'm like, but yo, we have pictures of that. I remember

now. Mark's like, yeah, we do have pictures. You have them. I'm like, where the fuck are they? He goes, you got to look. So I tore my house up looking through boxes of photos. I lost a lot of photos in Sandy in New Jersey. I got flooded. My basement got flooded. And I lost a lot of precious pictures. That's one of them. That would have been a great, like, story and you know what I'm saying like maybe even Robert would remember that you know because a bunch of wise guy kids from the neighborhood in the Hamptons you know this was when he had that little space between his teeth and all that you know it was the early 90s pickup artist yes yes yes yes less than zero where he had to you know that was a disturbing yeah so I mean um I got a lot of stories

and I don't want to put like you know reading Pablo's book you know punch um he kind of left off the book where there's going to be a part two. You can feel it. The minute you end that book, you're like, this book isn't done, you know. So I don't want to do a part one, part two. I would rather do like we just did this, you know, came to America and just write like each chapter for a part, like a little whatever, five, six years. Because there's a lot of dark stuff that I didn't touch on that I still carry. Like, you know, I carry that stuff about my dad. I carried the stuff about my mom um you know i was always alone you know what i'm saying so now that i got my son my son is my best friend uh he makes me a better person he's always the one telling me let the guy

go don't don't pull him over like i know you kick his ass and just let it go you it's not it's not you're not you know and i got to do it i mean and i let it go but old habits are hard to break and i'm if i could break the habit of not being in a life i could break the habit of not knocking somebody off or looking at me a wrong way you know what i mean right but it's a hard thing but whole thing is like I started doing podcasts to kind of like lay this out, let people know that, you know, I didn't have a father figure. If you could stay in school, stay in school. If you could like try to tiptoe around the law the best you can do it. Everybody's going to break the law a little bit, you know what I mean? But, you know, just try to stay out of trouble.

I mean, you know, you did time. I never did any serious hard time. But I've paid for it in other you know like i've i've pissed away so much money and i was just thinking about it the other day at at a given time a given year i was blowing on a thursday friday and saturday like five to 10 thousand you know for the whole weekend just going out to titty bars hanging out with guys rubbing elbows trying to make a connection like six months of spending money to make one two maybe connections to have like another connection for cars or for gold or for watches and, you know, it doesn't pay. The money comes, and the money flows through your...

It's like having a basket that's weaved. You pick up the water, it just comes out, you know? It doesn't stay. It's a lot of money, but you're still going paycheck to paycheck. I mean, look, I'm lucky. I'm at a point. I had a lot of real estate. I lost everything.

You know, I liquidated a lot of shit. I got rid of everything. I had to give that one apartment building I had in Queens. I had to give half to my... She didn't deserve it, but, you know, it is what it is. You know, I can't sit there. and say well I made it from illicit gains you know so whatever I gave her half shame on her because that would have been my sons it wouldn't have been mine you know I would have kept it

from my son but it is what it is I got a few watches out of the you know deal I got some great stories I got a lot of ink you know I got a great kid and uh I'm good where I'm at now in life you know all right all right we were I was I was hoping we were going to we were going to leave it off with the guy opening the door and saying I forgive you I understand understand and you guys were going to have a big hug. Hey, if it didn't work out that way. If it was me, I would have did the same thing. Like I'm waiting for the thing and I was like, yeah, that's, that's not we're

rewarding this. Like, this is horrible. No, no. My stories don't ever end like that, man. I'm sorry, man. My stories are real. All right. Listen, I really appreciate you, uh, you coming by.

Thank you. I appreciate it. It was a blast coming here. Yeah. Hey, I appreciate you guys watching the interview. Checking out the podcast. Thank you very much. please do me a favor subscribe if you like the video hit the bell so you get notified leave a comment

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