Matthew Cox | Inside True Crime Podcast - Surviving 27 Stab Wounds | Jane Boroski

Episode Date: September 4, 2024

Surviving 27 Stab Wounds | Jane Boroski

He put the knife up against my neck by the car door. And I saw a vehicle drive by. And I was like, the only way I'm getting out of this situation is to run and scream. And the next thing I know, I can feel his hand on the back of my shoulder as I was running. And he just tackled me down like a football player. He ultimately stabbed me 27 times. Then he just so calmly got stopped. and just so calmly, you know, walked away.

Hey, this is Matt Cox, and I'm doing an interview today with Jane Boroski, and she was, her case was covered on Unolved Mysteries, and it was, she was attacked by the, I want to say, it's the River Valley, killer she survived and we're going to listen to her her story and and talk about what's happening with the case and i've looked into it i've watched a couple of videos and jane's going to tell us what happened and what's going on with the case right now so i appreciate you guys watching and check this out one you know obviously i started and i say uh you know i appreciate you doing this interview i would call them a zoom interview but whatever you know i don't know this is streamer but I appreciate you doing the interview. And I watched, so I watched the episode of Unsolved Mysteries.

Yeah. And I watched a podcast with you talking about, it wasn't so much talking about your story as just kind of like the aftermath of what's happened since then. It was on the, it wasn't on your, it wasn't on your YouTube channel because you have a YouTube channel called Is it invisible tears? Yes. Invisible tears. And I watched you on a podcast with several other people,

and I think it was called like the, was it the underground or what was it called? You know what I'm talking about? It's the name of a podcast was it was Crawl Space. Crawl Space, yeah. Yeah, okay, underground crawl space, but yeah. They'll appreciate that. Yeah, so I watched you on,

watch the video on crawl space and i know you just started your own channel that is it's basically uh kind of an investigative channel on uh crimes and crime and victims of crimes and that sort of thing yeah is that right it's it's kind of it's kind of based on um for one the connecticut river the connecticut river valley murders right um that happened in the late 70s and 80s And I just kind of, nobody's really, they're cold cases. Like my attack happened in 1988, so they're all cold cases. And they're kind of being forgotten and they're unsolved. Right.

And so we wanted to start a podcast about getting to know the victims more, the victims that didn't survive. Because if you look them up online, all you see is the horrible thing that happened to them. You know, they're horrible murders, but you really don't know much about them. And so we really, we want to focus on that, too. And I want to focus on, what we're focusing on too is after something horrific like this happens to you, you don't just get over it and move on with your life. There's a lot of, you know, physically I healed fairly quickly.

Mentally, it took like 20 years before I started getting counseling and really started healing because I was clinically diagnosed with PTSD. And I didn't know that for 20 years after my attack. And there was a lot of struggles in my life. And I'm very, very transparent on my podcast about everything that I've been through and what I've, you know, had to deal with and, and my life was anything but normal for the first 20 years after my attack until I got counseling. So counseling really helped me a lot. And, you know, I hope to help somebody else out there to understand PTSD a little

bit better, especially if they have it and haven't been diagnosed with it. So, yeah. Okay. Well, I'm, so let's talk about what happened. I mean, there had been these unsolved murders where, uh, were they all women that had been attacked? They were. Yeah, they were. The bodies were found.

Yep. Uh, they, they were stabbed to death. Um. And moved, right? Is that right? Like, were they moved and then attacked somewhere else or? That's what they. believe yeah they were abducted some of them were adopted some of them were

hitchhiking and were picked up and they were taken to that's to their spot and stabbed to death when this was started in 19 you said 78 79 78 was the first one Kathy Milligan yeah and then in the 80s there was Elizabeth Critchley Eva Morris Ellen Freed Bernice Cordomache, Linda Moore, Barbara Agnew, and then myself. And after, I'm the only survivor. And that we know of, we're still really looking into that too.

We think that I was the last victim. So we're not really sure. We're still looking into that. I think there may have been more after me, but I'm not sure. Were they all found in the same general area? Um, Claremont area, Unity, uh, Kellyville. Um, the interesting thing is like Elizabeth, uh, Critchley and Eva Morris, they were both, both their bodies were found 500 feet apart, but five years apart. So like they found Elizabeth. And then five years later, they found Eva's body 500 feet from where. Elizabeth's body was found so we know that was a dump that was definitely a dumping

ground and they've been attacked in the same way and it was so they're policed our shirt the same the same killer yeah yeah um most of the bodies were really badly decomposed because it was you know they went missing and it was a year or two before they were found but I guess after doing forensics they found that they were definitely stabbed to death Okay. And so, all right. So the police definitely think that they're all, all connected. Yeah. Yeah. And then they do. And then one day, so there were all these murders and then one day you went to the fair? Yeah, I went to a fair, the county fair in Swansea, New Hampshire. And I was coming home. It was really hot. It was so hot and humid that night. And I was.

I was seven months pregnant. And I was going by a store. It was closed, but I had a soda vending machine outside. So I parked in front of the soda vending machine, grabbed a soda, and then the machine ate my money. So I had to go grab another soda. And there was a pay phone next to the soda machine. And I noticed a vehicle pulled in and parked right on my passenger

side of my car and parked. They were like right in front of the pay phone. And I was getting ready to leave and, and I having to look in my rearview mirror and he walked around the backside of my car up to my driver's door and opened up the door and tried to grab me out of the car. Asked me if the pay, first he asked me if the pay phone worked. And just as he did that, he opened my car door and try to take me out of the car. And I fought, I fought really bad. I somehow I got my feet up and I started kicking him. And as I was kicking him, I ended up kicking my windshield

and smashing my windshield. And it was, I don't know, after a few seconds of fighting, all of a sudden he takes a knife out and says, maybe this will persuade you to get out of the car. And it did. That definitely did. And I got out of the car. I was really persistent not to go with him.

So he just acted like really weird, confused. And I was scared. I didn't know what this guy wanted. I didn't know. I certainly did not. not think that he was capable of doing what he did. So he asked me if this was a Massachusetts car and told me I beat up his girlfriend.

And I was like, no, this isn't a Massachusetts car, and I certainly didn't beat up anybody. And he acted as if he was gonna walk back to his vehicle. He started walking back to his vehicle. And by this time, I'm like, oh, my God, this guy's a whack job. What the hell is he doing? And then it dawned on me, I have a smashed windshield. What the hell?

So for whatever reason, I yelled to him, hey, asshole, what about my windshield? Words I regret for the rest of my life. Because then he turned around and came back to me and put a knife up against my neck. People judge me. I should have got back in the car. I didn't feel threatened by him. I really didn't. When he was talking about the plate and me beating up his girlfriend, I just didn't feel threatened by him. I didn't know. I had no idea he was going to be doing what he did. But he put the knife up against my neck by the car door. And I saw a vehicle drive by, and I was like, the only way I'm getting out of this situation is to run and scream. So I started running and screaming at the vehicle,

and the vehicle just drove by. And the next thing I know, I can feel his hand on the back of my shoulder as I was running, and he just tackled me down like a football player. And I was on my back, and he got on top of me, and just started stabbing me. And it was so surreal. It was like, I couldn't

I don't believe that he was doing this. But yeah, I knew I had to protect my baby. Um, so I had a lot of defensive wound, stab wounds on my hands. And it was, um, he ultimately stabbed me 27 times. And then he just, just so calmly got stopped and just so calmly, you know, walked away. you know, walked away. I could hear him walking away. And I'm laying on the ground thinking,

oh, my God, I can't believe this just happened to me. And I knew I had to get up and get help. So as I rolled over to my hands and knees and getting up, I'm also wondering where the heck is he? Where is he? Is he coming back? You know, I don't hear anything. All of a sudden, I heard the vehicle.

And he just slowly drove, right? by my head as I was getting up and looked right down at me and I looked right up at him and he drove away and uh you think he felt like he had he had finished you off and there was just no surviving what had I mean 27 times who's going to survive that yeah so I do I believe he he left me for dead he thought I was going to die um I truly believe that and uh But then, at that moment, I think he thought I was going to die. But when I got my car and I had a friend that lived about two miles down the road on the same road, I knew I had to get to his house.

So I started going to driving down the road and the next thing I know, I'm right behind him. So he wasn't speeding off. He wasn't trying to get out of the area real quick. He was just casually driving. Yeah. And I got behind him and I was like, oh, my God. He's going to see where I'm going. That was my biggest fear.

He was going to see where I was going. Okay, now he knows I'm still alive. He knows that I'm driving and he's going to know where I'm going. So I came up on my friend's house and I pulled in the driveway and he kept going. And I said, I got out of my car. I didn't even shut my car off. I went up to my friend's door. He had this green door open.

He came to the door. He must have heard me drive in the driveway. And I just said to him some asshole just stab the crap out of me. You need to get me help. And then I collapsed on his stairs. I was just losing so much blood that I don't even know how I made it to his house. But yeah, so while he's calling for help, all of a sudden, we hear the car come back.

the vehicle and we hear it squeal its tires like slam on his brakes squeal its tires and then it took off and i think it was him i think he wanted to see where i was and see if people were home they were helping me or whatever and and then he took off and gone in the night never to be seen again he wants con bank of america out of two hundred and fifty thousand dollars using nothing but a fake ID and his charm. He is the most interesting man in the world. I don't typically commit crime, but when I do, it's bank fraud. Stay greedy, my friends.

Support the channel. Join Matthew Cox's Patreon. So, I mean, you called the police. So when you, one, when you were, I just, and I noticed this when I had watched the program And then again, like, I understand that, you know, in that moment, you're just trying to get away. But you do, if you think about trying to get his, uh, his tag number at the time and that never even occurred to you. Like, you got big. I wish I did.

Yeah. I mean, it never occurred to me because I was just, for one, I was in shock because of what just happened to me. I was just stabbed 27 times. And then afterwards, I found out he had, he had sliced my juggler. So on July 18th, get excited. This is big! For the summer's biggest adventure. I think I just smurf my pants.

That's a little too excited. Sorry. Smurfs. Only did it is July 18th. I was losing an enormous amount of blood. But I was so scared. I was more scared about him seeing where I was going. Right.

And so it just never occurred to me. But when I was hypnotized, the plate was really dirty. Right. So I don't think I really could have identified the plate to begin with because the plate was really, really dirty. It's easy to look back and think of all the things, you know, I should have done this, I should do. But in that moment, your instincts are kicking in and you're just like, I'm just trying to, I'm just trying to survive for the next five minutes. Yeah. But don't forget, too.

I was only 22. And there was no social media then. There was no internet then. And so I realized there was a serial killer lurking in New Hampshire. I didn't realize that there were people out there doing this. You know, I was 22. I was young. I've never been exposed to anything like this, you know, true crime or crime or anything like that.

The town that I was attacked in, there was virtually no. major crime back in the 80s it was a really small community so yeah I can I can look back and say oh I wish I did this wish I did that I didn't know that you know this is happening in the real world I was 22 right so um so my question is you that your friend calls the police or then an ambulance obviously they show up they come they pick you up at what point did the police show up to question you and start looking into this. Well, when I was still at the house,

a really good friend of mine, me and my husband's, P.D. Fire on him. He had showed up. He was the cop on duty. And he showed up. He knew me right off the bat. And he kept asking me, you know, who did this? And I told him I didn't know. And at that point, I had,

giving him a description of the vehicle. So they knew the vehicle description. What kind of was it? It was like a 1985 to 1987 Jeep Wagoner. It was either dark green or dark brown and it had wood green sides. So they had a really good description of the vehicle. But when I went to the hospital and then I was, I was immediately brought to the OR operating room. I was up in intensive care for about five days. I had two collapsed lungs,

cut my juggler. They gave me two bags of blood, sliced my tendon on my hand, sliced my tendon on my knee, and lacerated my liver. But my baby survived. Thank God. There was nothing, nothing, no stabs, no injury to her whatsoever. So while I was in the hospital, I was on the ventilator. And that's when they did the composite, which is interesting because it was all done by me, blinking my eyes and them showing me these little slides of different noses and faces and stuff like that.

But it was after I got out of ICU and got into my regular room is when all the detectives came up and actually interviewed me to actually know what happened. So for like five days, they had no idea what actually happened. They knew that I was stabbed. They knew it was, you know, they knew the vehicle and but very, very little more than that. Back then there was, it's not like there was a camera on every court street corner, you know, back then. Yeah, there was no camera on the store.

Drive away all the way, you're done. And like it should virtually impossible to track someone down at that point. Yeah, I know that for a couple of days, they did some roadblocks to see if anybody around the store to see if anybody had noticed anything that night, heard anything, and looking for the type of vehicle that I described. So I know that they did that for a few days before I came to and was able to be interviewed. Yeah. They, you know, at the time I think they did what they could. There was no forensics back then. They couldn't do DNA or anything like that.

They did lift fingerprints off my car. But I mean, there wasn't much they could do back then. They have nothing to compare it to. Yeah. Right. Yeah, I mean, they couldn't put fingerprints in CODIS back then. They couldn't run DNA back then. because it was, that didn't exist.

So how long did that, did they immediately connect it to the, up to the murders that it occurred? Or was that something? That's interesting because the media very quickly did. Because I was in the hospital and I actually read it in the paper. And then when the detectives came up, because they were up there almost every day seeing me,

And then when they came up, I was like, is this true? Because I never heard about the other murders. I didn't know anything about that. I didn't know that, you know, the serial killer was running around and had already killed these women. So, you know, I was like, is this true? And they were like, yeah, we're pretty sure that you're connected to them. So that's when I found out.

I guess there's quite a few factors that they consider that they considered and how they determined that I was I was one of the victims. Actually, I'm the survivor. Right. Yeah. And then so, okay, so one, they never caught the guy. No. But you're saying there, you think there may have been other victims. after you that haven't been connected?

And where did that go? Because I had heard that there were, that there were other, there were suspects, like they suddenly had suspects, but they just never connected. So do what, what happened with that? I mean, obviously this dragged on for years. Yeah.

Decades at this point. My attack was 34 years ago. So I don't know. I think, I know that it's in the cold case unit, all these, all the, this whole case, my case and their cases. But, and I know that a lot of different eyes have looked at them. But, I mean, personally, I haven't been called in 30 years. They haven't, with all the different eyes going in and. looking at these cases and looking at mine, I have not had, I would think that some detective

would, with new eyes, would call me and say, have some kind of questions for me. Right. After 30, after 34 years, you know, oh, I, you know, I need this clarified. Can you clarify this for me or can you clarify that for me? I haven't been in contact in over 30 years, except a couple years ago, two years ago, exactly, I had a detective from Concord call me out of the blue and said, can we re-fingerprint you? I'm just briefly looking at your case and want to re-fingerprint you because I know there was some fingerprints lifted off your car and I want to eliminate, which they did that back then. Everybody that touched my car was fingerprinted so that they could eliminate fingerprints.

And I was like, yeah, I'll come in. I have no problem with that. He's like, oh, I'll call you in two weeks. Give me about two weeks and I'll schedule you in with, and you know, you can go right over to Keene and do it instead of coming all the way to Concord. And I was like, okay, give me a call back. Let me know when and where.

Perfectly available. I haven't heard from him back. He has never called me back. I haven't heard from them since. It was just so weird. It's like all of a sudden out of the blue, they call me and then I don't hear back from them. So I don't know.

I don't know. I think that with my case and their cases, it's a lot of misopportunity of solving these. Right. Well, especially over the years. I mean, now they got forensics and they got DNA and they've got all this stuff. And are they running this stuff, you know?

They got CODIS now. Are they running, you know, fingerprints through CODIS? But they won't talk to me, so I have no idea. They won't even talk to me anymore. I try calling up there and I get the run around. Somebody will call you back and nobody does or I don't know. They took me, they have a website, the cold case website for New Hampshire, and it has all the cold cases on there.

And for, God, good five, ten years I was on. on there and all of a sudden they took me off it. So I'm not even on there anymore. It's like, you know, it's frustrated. You know, all I want is the answers. I don't want to bug them. I don't want to tell them how to do their jobs. I mean, they should know how to do their jobs.

But I want answers, you know. Where is this going? Are you still looking at things? There's new technology nowadays. Are you using it? You know, but I don't get anything because they won't even talk to me anymore well sometimes it's publicity that changes changes these things like there oh yes it does there were there was some several murders and uh in tampa and the problem is

is especially something like this since it's so random like you don't know who this guy is he obviously didn't know who you were he's driving by he saw an opportunity hey there's a girl there's a woman there young woman at a store by herself very little lighting no cameras nobody's around let me swing in here. He may have been driving around for hours looking for that opportunity. So the thing is like there was a murder in Florida. I mean, there's tons of these. But this one in particularly in particular stands out where there had been a was a woman that had come to Florida on vacation with her two daughters met had a guy stopped or a guy had met her at a gas station. He said, oh, you're on vacation with your daughters. let me take the three of you out um to you know on a fishing trip and she said oh that'd be wonderful you know and this is i want to say this is in the 80s he he gave he wrote down his or he wrote down something for her like his an address a phone number something i forget what it was and or like hey i'll meet you here at this time like an address and he just wrote it down

and gave it to her and she left that address in her car somewhere and they found the car later they never found the kids she had told somebody oh I met we met a guy at a gas station he's going to take us out he has a boat they never heard from her again nobody ever heard from her again they found like this in either her car or in her hotel room something and that went on saw for a couple decades and then the cold case team got a hold of it and somebody went through and said we have a we have one clue all we've got we know as a man we have a clue and they took that and they put it on a billboard and said does anybody recognize this handwriting and a woman drove by and saw the handwriting and called the police and said that's my ex-husband's handwriting

why what's going on who are those women and they talked her and they said did he have a boat she goes yes he did have a boat he's had several boats we live a couple of blocks from you and they said does he are you in this area he said in from this address we lived a couple blocks from that area when was this happened to be she was on vacation for a week visiting her mother turns out he had choked her several times he was extremely abusive he'd been arrested in the past he had attacked women in the past he was a bit like he was just across the board and somehow another they came and they they arrested him and they grabbed him and eventually he confessed and that was it he and he explained the whole thing he had met her he'd met the kids brought him on the thing got him on the boat you can imagine what happened dump their bodies in the ocean but i mean so sometimes it's some guy some guy that you don't you don't know that says hey who knows i mean i can think of another cold case where where they went and re-interviewed the victim.

And it just so happens that while she was saying, she was being re-interviewed, the one police officer asked one question that nobody else had asked. And he went, and it was like, what? And she said that. He said, that's weird. So he went back and checked something out. And next thing you know, boom, they had the car.

Track the car down, went in, talked to the guy. And then sometimes it's just a matter of talking to their friends and family. And they say, oh, man. He admitted to me that he had done this. And then they look into the person and they find out that his DNA matches. And you just don't know, you just don't know. But it's a combination of publicity and it's a combination of going back and looking. And, you know, I mean, I know the police have to be frustrated.

But, you know, and there obviously there's, you know, there's a lot going on. Yeah, there is a lot going on now. But I mean. You don't know if you take another look at it. Exactly. So I had seen on the, um, the, the, um, the, Untold Mysteries, one, where they had done an update and they said that you believed that it might be possible that there was, that you thought you might have known that this person

had, somebody had died and you thought he might be a suspect? Michael Nicolao. If you go on and punch up Connecticut River Valley serial killer, Michael Nicolao's picture is there. I'm going to explain. A few years ago, quite a few years ago, I think it was 2008 or something like that, 2005. I was contacted by a private investigator in Florida.

And she was investigating a missing person and come up, um come up upon michael nicolao and she um upon investigating him she really felt she came across the connecticut river valley murders so she really felt like he was connected um i formed a relationship with her And we were, she really convinced me that it was him. I was, you got to understand it. I have so many people come to my door, still, still, after all these years, just a few months ago, I had one. They come to my door, they email me, or they, you know, send me letters.

I know who did this. It was my husband. It was my ex-husband. It was my cousin. and it was my classmate or whatever. A lot of people have come to me with this information. And, you know, I've always been, give it to the state police, bring it to conquer to the detective unit.

I can't do anything with it. But Lynn, this private investigator, she had told me that she had given all the information to the detectives, but they weren't doing anything about it. and that, you know, we needed to do all this social media and all this media to get the word out that it was Michael Necklau and da-da-da-da-da. And I was really against it at first because I felt like I thought it was the detective's responsibility to do that. But she just felt like that they weren't giving it enough attention. And, you know, she made me feel like if I didn't do this and nobody was going to take us seriously, that nobody was ever going to take any of any of this seriously.

So I did it. I wish I didn't. I wish I had just distanced myself and let the detectives investigate it. So I understand. I ended up severance, I ended up just not having contact with her anymore. And I've had a few other private investigators look into Michael Nicolao. And, yeah, he doesn't fit. There's a lot of things.

She was trying to make everything fit with Michael Nicolow, but there was a lot of things that didn't fit. And she never focused on that. She just tried to. Did he get it against the guy? or did she was... I think it was for her own agenda because she had a lot of plans.

Like she wanted to do a movie and... And I think she felt like if she could solve this because nobody else could, then it would bring her a lot of... She loved media attention. Loved media attention. Yeah, there's... And I think that's what she...

That's what I think she was... trying to get was a lot of media attention. And she was trying to convince people this was him for her own agenda. And as soon as I realized that is when I decided I didn't want contact with her anymore. And as I talked to, you know, I did talk to the detectives once about it. And they were just like a lot of things didn't fit. You know, we're still looking into it. but just a lot of things didn't fit.

And same with some of the private eyes that I had looked and had other people look into it. And they were like, you know, some things fit, but a lot of things don't fit. And a lot of her information was hearsay, secondhand. Just wasn't a lot of reliable information. But she went wild and crazy on social media and on the internet.

So now when you look these up, there's his name, there's his face. And we're trying to get rid of that now. Because these are still unsolved cases. That's what I really, really want people to understand. These are still unsolved. Nobody has ever been convicted of these. Right.

And I really want people to understand that. Right. Um, what is going on? Like, there's like, they're mowing or something. I hear that. Um, I don't know. There's nothing I can do about it. I just think you want to wait 20 minutes.

Um, I think so, you know, it's funny. Like I, I, I have a, a guy that grew up in my neighborhood had been murdered. And everybody knows who did it. right so and this is this is an you know upper middle class neighborhood just some kid who when he was 19 20 21 years old started selling selling drugs and started selling drugs with another kid and then he ended up rip the first kid ripped off the second kid well the second kid well i'm actually the the the second kid ended up ripping off the first kid and so what happened was the first kid who's an upper middle class you know kid like he's selling drugs granted but you know not like you wouldn't think violent or anything um and he one day talked to the the second participant and said hey let's go buy some more drugs acting like he didn't know that he had ripped him off picked him up in a used or in a rental car that was rented to

was from his girlfriend picked him up drove him out to the woods and um basically tied him to a tree and broke his fingers and beat him and then eventually shot him several times and left him for dead he was found about two three weeks later by a guy that you know they call him the snake charmers the guys who catch they catch snakes in the world Florida um it's a thing here so some guy in the middle of nowhere found the body now when the police went in looked into it they were they're like okay the last person last phone calls made to this guy was this guy he picked him up at his house he picked him up in a rental car oh and they found the rental car set on fire a few miles away like the whole thing is it's like there's all this circumstantial evidence and the the guy

the the murderer has confessed several times he's told people in bars he's He's gotten drunk with buddies and told them, oh, I killed him. But it's still cold case because they're like, murder's very hard to prove. You know, we go that like one, and his parents are saying he was home the whole time with us. Never left that weekend. So everybody who's saying he left and picked this guy up and that's a lie. He was here with us. We watched the football game.

We don't know what you're talking about. Like, you know, the girlfriend who initially said, you know, Yes, I had rented a car, but it got stolen. You know, all of these little things that, you know, that they could never quite put it together. Like, we can't have the girlfriend say the car got stolen because there's the car that they said he got picked up with. The parents are saying that, like, it's, there's lots of circumstantial evidence, but the truth is, in the end, it's not enough for us that we can't spend $40,000 or $50,000 trying a case where the girlfriend's going to say, I rented the car. He never had it. It was stolen.

You know, the parents say, he never left the house. Like, what do you really have? You've got one person that says, my boyfriend said, this guy was picking him up. And I remember he called him and said, hey, I'm outside. And he walked outside, got in the car and left. That's all I know. Is that the car? Yeah, it was like a rental car, like an average four-door car.

I think that's the car. Is it the car? They made it. They made 30,000 of them. You see what I'm saying? It's like, it's like, it's not enough. The evidence is there, and a lot of people are like, oh, you should this. They could, you have to understand.

They understand what's going to be presented in front of a jury, and then they lose, and then they've lost it. Then they never get that guy. So, you know, it's, it's, I see that it's a tough situation for police, especially when it seems like all the evidence is there. He had multiple times. He told people he did it. He's told people. Yeah, he was drunk in a bar, mouthing off.

it wasn't recorded will that person get on on the stand and say he said it and even then it's just hearsay second hand yeah and the problem is in most states hearsay you know really isn't admissible so he may not be able to get on the stand and say that he heard it it's it's a problem you know it's um so i mean i i i feel it's like i always feel for the detectives i mean i feel for you know someone who's like, hey, it's so obvious, the problem is what they believe and what they can prove are just two different things. And it sounds solid to you and I, but then they know what it's going to sound like in front of a jury.

It's a tough situation, you know. He once got plastic surgery because he didn't like the photo on his wanted poster. His legend precedes him. The way indictments precede arrests. He is the most interesting man. in the world. I don't typically commit crime, but when I do, it's bank fraud. Stay greedy, my friends. Support the channel. Join Matthew Cox's Patreon.

So now you started a podcast. I checked it out. I saw that you just started posting videos only, what, about three weeks, maybe a month ago? We launched August 29th. Okay, yeah, yeah. A month, a month, okay. Yeah. So I saw that. And what I'll do is it's, it's, hold on,

it's called Invisible Tears. Yeah. And I'll leave the link in the description, if anybody wants to click on. Awesome. And the first, but the first two episodes, you just go over your story, right? I do.

I start right from the beginning and talk about my whole attack. all the way through to, you know, maybe in in the hospital. And then the following one is me having Jessica, my daughter. So who's the person? There's another person that's on the podcast with me. My co-host, Amanda, she does all the editing, and she's the producer with her husband, and she's my co-host, and she's my, gosh, she's my everything. She's my life coach and my Riki master and a very, very dear friend.

Are you, I'm sorry, go ahead. Go ahead. I was going to say, are you planning on, see, now they stop, they stop mowing. Are you planning on interviewing the, trying to interview the families of any of the other? We are, we are. That's going to come next season, probably in the spring. Um, because I'm also doing, I'm also involved with another project, Dark Valley. And, uh, they're doing, um, that's what Tim and Lance and Jen from Carl Space Media.

Okay. And, uh, they're going to be launching in, in the spring. I want to say right around the April, April mark. So, um, they've been doing a lot of, uh, interviewing of the family members. And, um, so we think we're going to be, interviewing family members in our next season. But we interviewed John Philpin. He was the...

Investigator? Yeah, he's... God, I just went dead. He's the one that does... Oh, criminal profiler. Okay. Yeah, John's the criminal profiler. of all these cases.

And he was very involved with the task force that they formed in the 80s. And I did a wonderful interview with him. Very intriguing man. I've known him for years, but in this interview, I learned so much more about him. Wonderful, wonderful man. He's been doing criminal profiling for years and years

with a lot of different big cases. And I'm also going to I got a, um, there was another victim that I did an interview with. Her name is, uh, Michelle Renee. Um, she did a, um, they did a movie on her, uh, on lifetime held hostage. And she also wrote a book held hostage. Her and her daughter were at home one night and these men came in and held them hostage overnight and made her, tied her daughter up in dynamite.

and made her go and rob her bank the next day. She had to leave her daughter wrapped in dynamite and go rob her bank. Amazing story, terrifying. But her, she's just such an inspiration to everybody because she's overcome so much. And she shares her story and her healing with PTSD. and so that's that's another wonderful interview.

She's a very, very dear friend. It's funny because she lives out in California, but, and we never met, we've only talked on the phone, but it's like we know we known each other forever. So, yeah, we've got a lot of good stuff coming. A lot, I talk a lot about my life after the attack because a lot of people don't realize, you know, my life just didn't,

My attack just didn't end that day. It carried on in my life for 20 years. I mean, the financial impact that it put on my life from my attack, the mental, I received hate letters. It's like, you know, doing unsolved mysteries and stuff like that. It was like, the hate letters are, That one just aired yesterday. That episode was just on yesterday, or today.

Today it's going to be on. The podcast where you talk about the hate letters? Yeah. On your channel? Yeah, on Invisible Tears. Yeah, I mean, people, like, this happened a couple of years after my attack. People were, it was right after Unsolved Mysteries. People wrote me letters, like, from different parts of the country.

And he unwrote letters because we didn't have the Internet or anything back then. But they, yeah, they wrote me letters saying, I need to stop playing the victim card and take responsibility for what I did. And I should have known better than to stop at that store at night, especially putting my unborn child in dangers. The letters are crazy. It was like. People are scumbags.

They are. But you know what? They'll leave stuff in the comments, you know, like, just they troll you. Why just survive back to school when you can thrive by creating a space that does it all for you, no matter the size. Whether you're taking over your parents' basement

or moving to campus, IKEA has hundreds of design ideas and affordable options to complement any budget. After all, you're in your small space era. It's time to own it. Shop now at IKEA.ca. I'll say, and they're just looking for attention. I mean, yeah, but yeah, they're looking for attention on, on the media part, but this was before social media.

I mean, these people existed. Yeah, yeah. Instead, they had to write letters. Yeah, yeah. But the thing about those was, them affected me for a long time. I didn't tell anybody about those letters until I told my counselor 20 years later. I mean, those letters reading them all the time really convinced me for a long time that my attack was my fault. And I talk a lot about that in this episode.

Because it was your fault because you wanted a soda? Because I wanted a soda. It was hot and I wanted a soda. Like that, like, you know, like no matter where you go at any time, you really, you know, you know what I'm saying? like you shouldn't be like you should be able to anywhere where else could be safer than a store with no people around yeah there's nobody around like I should be perfectly fine here no I should stop in the you know in an area where there's packed full of people but to me people are dangerous um so yeah it's just crazy crazy time you know people people will they can twist facts to suit their own needs um So I was going to mention this to you. You know, I was when I was incarcerated, well, one, your friend, by the way, that was the daughter was held hostage. Yeah.

Have you ever heard of the pizza bomber? The guy, they put a collar on this guy that had had explosives in it and told them to go rob a bank. Oh, I remember that. Turns out he was in on it. Like he, the guy with the collar was in on the crime. And it went off, it blew up and, you know, blew his head off. Well, the guy that actually made the device, they called them the pizza bomber, I was in prison with. Really?

He ended up dying in prison. It's good. Very strange guy. Very weird guy. So that one I wanted to mention that, which is very similar to that, that type of a, it's just such a bizarre, you know, it's, I hate to say, well thought out. It is well thought. So overwhelmingly devious, like anyone who thinks that much into it and goes to that extent, like, they should never get out of prison. Like that's, that's, that's pretty scary people to have on walking around on the streets.

What's even stranger about the pizza one is if he's in on it, like, you're not putting a working device on my neck. There's a timer. There's a timer. It's going to go off. And it did go off. So that's crazy in an end of itself. Second thing I was going to mention was, have you ever looked at your file that the police have? Well, this is interesting because I just sent a letter asking for my file, asking for, and I got a response back that it's going to take about 180 days and come 180 days, they may have to extend it for another 180 days.

days because of lack of resource they need to yeah go through stuff and see what they can give me and what they can't give me so no i've never seen it uh i i just realized or i just it was just brought to my attention not too long ago that i have a right to see it yeah but um information act that's what i just sent them freedom of public records act is it for the state but yeah you absolutely when i was incarcerated i ordered all kinds of of people's information in their cases and you'd be shocked at what you'll get especially you know in the state you'll probably get a lot of stuff and you get to see who they interviewed when they interviewed what they said that's what i want that's what i really really want it may also help

spark spark something for you things that people have said although yours is so random i don't know that that's necessarily possible but it you don't you don't know what's going to happen I'm always shocked at what breaks the case. You know, son of Sam just happened. He got a parking ticket. The whole case was blown open because he got a parking ticket. Like, you know, who somebody said, let's try and figure out what cars were in that area. Let's get one of these rookies to look through and see who got a parking ticket.

Like that one person, they've been looking at it for months and months and months. One guy had one decent idea that ended up, catching, you know, Berkowitz. That's what I keep saying. I keep saying these, a lot of misopportunities in solving these cases and solving mine. And I think it's just gonna take that one thing, that one little, my fingerprints,

the fingerprints off my car. I mean, I think that if they've run that, even if they've ran it before years ago, run it again. You don't know if he's been fingerprinted for a job. job or anything you know he's been arrested look people don't just stop and sometimes someone like this with this kind of a personality defect isn't just going to stop no he's not going to say hey i got all i'm all better now um yeah um yeah the the other thing i was gonna uh you gonna say was you know it may not even be your case that anything on your case it just may be you know if they ran old dna from all the

the other cases maybe he cut himself during one of these you know knives blood is slippery people's hands slip maybe he cut himself maybe there was a sample taken maybe he's been had his DNA taken since then you know that that happens um there's lots of little tiny things that can eventually catch up to people so you know you don't know but um do you have anything else uh that you want to you want to mention or um I have a granddaughter now because my daughter survived because I survived my daughter survived and I have a granddaughter so I think that's pretty special I just don't want these victims to be forgotten and I don't want this case these cases to be forgotten they're

unsolved no matter what you read on the internet these cases are still unsolved and that's like super important for people to know have you thought about um writing a book of some type or i have i have thought about it um even if it's small like it doesn't have to be three or 400 pages it can be 150 page book i mean that's you know and the nice thing about something like that is that's something you can physically give to documentary producers you know that they have an accounting and they have all the details in chronological order and they can see it and they can decide hey this is this is a thing like we need to you know we need to look into this it can be as simple as a true crime memoir where it's simply from your perspective well I've been with working with cross-based media and with Dark Valley that was that was the intent was they want to do a documentary on on all this, the Connecticut River Valley murders, and my case and all of it.

So right now we're trying to find somebody to buy it. We thought we had somebody, but they were like, well, these are unsolved, there's no ending. It's like, what are you talking about? I mean, who knows? It might be by the time we get done with the documentary, you don't know. You know, right now we're looking,

we had quite a few suspects, names, come to our attention and we're really looking into those a lot but um you know i don't understand why they need an a solved ending they need us they need the the cases to be solved in order to do the documentary well that's that's not a documentary i think documentary is going through and and and looking at everything and following us with with looking at you know all kinds of different evidence and suspects and stuff like that and doing interviews. And so, I don't know, we're hoping. It's a lack of imagination on the producer's part to say that it has to be answered.

I mean, there are documentaries out there. There's plenty out there where there's no conclusive answer. It's a matter of documenting this entire, you know, this entire process of what happened. And maybe the whole documentary is that, hey, there were so many opportunities and this is now this is you know this is an issue that look at all these opportunities that were missed and and it should have been solved you know who knows that's what we're focusing on so hopefully you know somebody will hopefully they'll they'll present it to someone that that does want to buy it

so we have hopes and the meantime you might want to look you might want to enter the Freedom of Information Act or on the other victims too it'll tell you a lot more than I'm sure you already know like you what you've gotten so far is you've spoken with probably a few of the families and maybe you've spoken and you've read the articles but you actually get the case files which are cold like there's no reason they they shouldn't be able to say they but new hampshire is so different the hampshire does not like given information at all they don't even like talking to you um like fred murray like mora morris case fred murray he had to go to court and sue them so he could see his

his own daughter's uh uh information the whole investigation and all that i mean they don't the hampshire is so different they don't like to um give information whatsoever and uh but but we are i'm fighting for it so we'll see what happens to me i would start the process yep because i started the process with mine so right well i'd start the process with everybody because you already have a form letter you already wrote your letter so you already have the letter written it's a matter of popping in the different um names and and finding those those different departments or is it the same department it's as far as i know everything is up in the cold case unit up in conquer new hampshire so then it should be pretty easy and then if they of course if they end up

saying no and they give you a denial well then you can go to court you know you can pull the documents for what the other person had filed in his case you just copy his motions and once that process starts most likely most likely they give it to you or then call a local reporter have the reporter call and say why aren't you give under the freedom of public records why aren't you typically they go wait a second now let let we're going to give her hold on no you might get a phone call and they might say of course we're going to give it to you i don't know why we said no That's crazy. That was John. John's not here anymore. Yeah, you'll probably get everything. So, but at the very least, what's great is because I've written a bunch of books,

true crime books while I was incarcerated. What was great is that there were always these little tiny details that that make it interesting. And then once you've got all of those files, it's great to be able to go to a documentary producer, director, and be able to say, hey, like, I've done all the research because their first thought is like, you don't realize the amount of research that's going to go into this. No, I do. And I have the research. And I've broken it up and it's written in a 190 page or a 250 page book. And I have documents to prove everything. Now they go, oh, wow, this change, that changes a lot. So it's something to think about, I'd like to, I'd like to write a book about my story. You know, if anything about my case and my story, I don't even know where to begin with that. I'm not, I'm not one to. It seems overwhelming,

but to be honest, if you take a day or two to write an outline, just a brief outline on what you want to cover, and then you try and write a page or two pages a day, what happens is six months from now, you turn around and you'll go, I'm done. Like, oh my gosh. By that point, you'll probably have most of the documents in, and you can go through and you can say, hey, on October 32nd, or 32nd, on October 22nd, you know, at this time, and you can start putting in those little tiny details and filling it out. And it comes together very easily. The problem is that discipline of writing one or two pages a day, which is no easy feat. Listen, it's hard. But the most important thing really is writing that a solid outline which takes a day or two and it

doesn't have to be perfect it's just kind of like hey i want to talk about my family i want to do a little four or five pages about where i was raised i want to talk about meeting my my husband to be or my future husband i want to talk about us dating i want to talk about like i want to i want to build the i want the reader to know who i am a little bit before i get this horrific crime and then all the things that happened after so it it's definitely it's something to look into and it it it's just it is a discipline but but i mean i'm sure you can do it you guys yeah it's the outline it's the outline and then you have something to present i have put my mind to it i got really because a lot of people have said you know you need to write a book yeah you need to

even if it's a small book you need to write a book but think about it you've been writing that book in your mind it's done so you got that right you know and if you say oh well i need an editor listen they're very inexpensive editors very amy for a few hundred bucks you can get an entire book edited you can you can you really you know listen you figure it out how to hook up stream yard okay like you got on here within a couple of minutes it took me like 20 minutes to figure out how to work so i'm sure you can pull it off yeah Well, listen, I wish you the best of luck with the podcast and everything. Thank you so much.

Yes, Invisible Tears. Listen to it. Find it on your wherever you list to your favorite podcast. We have Facebook. We have Instagram, Twitter. Look us up. We have a website, Invisible dash Tears.com. And we're all over telling our story, getting our story out.

Well, I appreciate you taking the time and being interviewed. Thank you for allowing me to tell my story on here. That was great. It means a lot. Thank you. Hey, I appreciate you guys watching. If you like the video, do me a favor and hit the subscribe button, hit the bell so you get notified of videos just like this. Also, leave me a comment in the comment section.

And I try and respond to most of the comments. if you're interested in supporting the channel i have a patreon i'll leave that description in the description box and uh check me out on all my social medias i'm going to leave uh all of jane's information in the description box also and i appreciate you guys uh watching the video and thank you very much and i will see you