Mayim Bialik's Breakdown - Justin Long: Address Your Trauma Head On

Episode Date: June 7, 2022

Justin Long (Dodgeball, Lady of the Manor, Life is Short podcast) opens up about his process for exploring trauma and the reasons he didn’t seek therapy sooner. He details his traumatic experience being drugged and kidnapped, discusses his struggles with overcoming his people-pleasing tendencies, and highlights the importance of validating one’s feelings. Justin reveals his meditation process and treats us to his impressive roster of celebrity impressions. Justin Long's Podcast: https://wondery.com/shows/justin-long/ BialikBreakdown.com YouTube.com/mayimbialik Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There's something about him that's like, amen. That's right. That's what I like about them high school girls, man. And he's very like, all right, all right, all right. He's that guy, but it's got to be kind of like, kind of seductive, like a little bit in the ears. Can you say my name? Can you just say my name like that? Mine.

That's right, mine. All right. You're listening to My Ambiali. Hi, I'm Myambialic, and welcome to My Breakdown. This is where we break things down so you don't have to. It's MyMBiolic's Break. We're going to break it down for you Because you know she knows a thing or two

And now she's going to break down We're going to be talking to Justin Long today He's got a long career He's the face of so many things That you will know him from But first, one of my favorite faces That I know things about Jonathan Cohen That was weird

That was weird Sometimes I'm weird You could have just stopped after one of my favorite faces. In any event, Jonathan, we're talking to Justin Long today. He's built an eclectic body of work over the years. You might know him from Dodgeball, Drag Me to Hell, Live Free or Die Hard. He's just not that into you. He's the voice of Alvin in Alvin the Chipmunks.

And also just recently wrote with his brother and directed a really cool movie called Lady of the Manor with Melanie Linsky and Judy Greer. Also, he's got a podcast and has had a podcast for quite some time called Life is Short where he talks to really, really cool people who want to get personal with him. I hope to be one of them. But first we welcome him here. He's a really funny guy. I'm just going to say that. I'm not just saying that. He really is a funny guy. I mean, his impressions are pretty incredible and he shares some of them with us, which is really fun. Really, really excited. Jonathan, anything else we should talk about before we welcome Justin Long? Let's talk to Justin. Justin Long, welcome to the breakdown. Break it down.

So you're a basketball fan? I am. I'm a sporty person in general. I'm a very active participant. I'm very emotionally invested in... Do you yell? Do you get a grat? Are you hostile toward the other team? You know, I'm not... I am a gentleman, as it were when it comes to my cheering. I don't believe in booing the other team. You know, I went to UCLA, and I was at UCLA for a total of 12 years. Oh, right, of course. I went to a lot of games, learned a lot about sports etiquette. You're from Fairfield, Connecticut.

It's where I am now. Oh, that's you're from there. Yes, can't you see? What teams do you root for? Oh, that's a good question. When I was growing up, it was, yeah, because there are some that are split in the, We're in the tri-state area, which is closer to New York. And so we were either Jets or Giants in football.

Right. Unfortunately, my family was at Jets. We were Jets fans. Yeah. It's rough. And so we're hopeful, again. We're a very hopeful group. And then the Nix, we were Knicks fans.

Right. Okay. And Mets versus Yankees. Oh, that's where you got me. Okay. Yeah. I lost you. That's all right.

You lost me, but that's okay. I like rooting for underdogs. I was always into underdog. I always like seeing underdogs win. Like, I always root for the bills, you know, assuming the jets are out of it, which they always are. I like those, like the Browns, you know, I like to see teams that have had run a tough luck, succeed. I'm such a good person, my. You're a very good person.

That's really the take-home message. Yes. Which is why he agreed to do our podcast. He's like, she's an underdog. I do this. Yes. Like charity. It's charity.

Yeah. No, I was excited to do. do this. And I'll tell you who was really excited. My mother, I don't remember the last time I got that kind of reaction from her. Because ultimately, that's why we do all of this, right, is to make our mom's happy. We want our artwork on the fridge. And so she said, she really lit up when, because we were a big Jeopardy family. And so, um, no one reacts to my name more than 65 plus. That's our doubt. Oh, I bet. How great, though. Those are the, those are the, those are the, those are the ones I would most want to be. Loyal, loyal fans. Do you get a lot of like, we like you

better than Ken. Sometimes. Sometimes. Sometimes I get, we don't prefer you to Ken. Yeah. Isn't that wild that people, well, it's probably the only profession that I can think of, or maybe politicians, where people will tell you really like deeply insulting things, but with a big smile, you know.

Like, I saw you in a magazine. I was very confused. You look pretty. Oh, geez. I get that. A lot. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You better. And this sounds like I'm bragging, but it's not. You're better looking in person? Yes, that's a tough one. Because then you think, well, what do I care what you like? That means millions of people, to millions of other people, I'm worse looking. Well, actually, this is a good kind of in point for where a lot of people knew you from, let's say, you know, 20 years ago versus now.

The first thing I thought was not, boy, he's better looking now than he used to be. But you are a man now and you were much younger in a lot of people's mind. That's the most flattering thing anyone's ever said to me. Thank you, Maya. Yeah, I'm getting there. When did you start your... When did I finish puberty? No, when did you start your acting career?

I always looked young. So I was older. I was deceptively older than people probably think. Because I was... I dropped out of school. My junior year, I took a year off. It was the year. A lot of kids were doing junior year abroad.

And so I wanted to be an actor at that point. And so I went to New York and I did all the cattle calls. And that's, and then I got something that led to other things. So I kept deferring my enrollment. And I was 20. I was 20 when I started professionally doing it. And but really, again, looked young. And so I was able to, and that was during a time, I'm sure you remember,

where there were a lot of teen, they were making a lot of teen movies and teen teen. That's when people were interested in teenagers. Yes, yeah. Dawson's, you know, during that time. And so it was a great time to be a young-looking 20-something-year-old actor. And yeah, I started like 99. Okay. And I don't know if you wrote this for IMDB, but I found it hilarious.

Hold on one second. I need to read it, though, because it's adorable. It says, Justin Long, actor, a likable, boyish-looking actor with thick eyebrows and a friendly smile. Yeah, I did write that. No, I did it. Oh, I don't know who brought. Who wrote that? I think it's an adorable. No.

I don't know. At one point it said on, did it still say that? I'm literally looking at it. That's funny. It compared me to Tim Allen. At one point on Wikipedia, my dad, he was really bothered by this, understandably.

It said that he had, he wasn't bothered by this part. It said that he was Asian. I didn't bother him, but that he had died in a car accident. Stop. No. No.

That's a terrible story. Your father, was a philosophy and Latin professor. Is that right? Yeah. He sounds like a hoot. He is a hoot. He's very funny.

He's got a great dry sense of humor. He was in the seminary for seven years. Like, wait, wait, wait, hold on. Like to be a priest? To be a priest, yeah, a Catholic seminary. How hot is your mom? My mom's so hot. She made my dad.

She got my dad out of the seminary. Yes, totally. Yeah, it's funny. During, like, prime, during 18 to 25, I mean, really like, Those years. Those years. So then what happened? I don't mean to make you tell your dad's story, but that's amazing.

We can never really get, we've never gotten like a clear answer. Like why exactly. Of course we're curious about it. I think it was a lot of things. I think it was the wanting to, probably wanting to get married, wanting to, you know, explore relationships. He didn't want to be married to God. He was married to God for seven years. He got the seven-year itch from God.

He divorced God. He still. in a relationship with God, but they're just not. They're polyam. They're downshifted. They're polyam. Yes. They're seeing other people.

Yeah, he was, he left when he was 25. And then he became, but he learned so much. A lot of Latin. I mean, the Latin thing now makes sense because. Yeah. He translated a lot of manuscripts. He was a, so he was into the neoplatonist. So like Aquinas was his guy.

There was a guy pre-Aquinas who was this guy, no one, five people have heard of. named Richard Fishacre, and he was, he's known for solidifying the curriculum at Oxford of a very particular medieval studies program. So that's what, that was his field of concentration. And so he had to, of course, translate a lot of Latin and ancient Greek. And he's an incredibly bright guy. But, but, yeah, surprising.

And my mom is kind of on the other end of the... Your mom's an actor, correct? My mom's an actress, yeah, or was, and then became a teacher when we needed to make some money. Because that's where all the money is, as you know. If it's not in acting, it's in teaching. Yeah, unfortunately, I'm obviously joking. But she was an actress, yeah. And so she's a lot, I mean, they're very personality-wise.

They're quite different. It's an interesting pair. But they're both very funny. So we were lucky to have. And you're the middle of three boys. Are the others artistically inclined? Are they? Well, I kind of got into acting.

My brother, my older brother, Damien, was, an incredible actor, is an incredible actor. And so I kind of followed him. He was always, you know, monkey see, monkey do. And he ended up becoming a teacher. He's a teacher. And my little brother is a really funny writer. And we do the podcast together.

Right. You do the podcast together. Also, um... Life is short if you're listening to. Yeah, yeah. Sorry. Like that short. Not now.

I don't listen now. Right. Keep listening to us. Um, but also you just did a movie together that you, you co-wrote and co-directed. Is that correct? Yes. Thanks, Mel. I mean, it's a compliment, but thanks for mentioning it.

I mean, yeah, it's called Lady of the Manor and it's out. I'm not exactly sure how you see it. I should know that on Amazon. You think if you look on Amazon, it's with Judy Greer and Melanie Linsky, who are two of my favorite actors. And we just love doing it. We did it right before the pandemic we finished about like two weeks before. Wow.

And in fact, when that happened, I remember you recently directed something. Last summer, yes. Last summer, yes. So with Dustin Hoffman, right? Yeah, and Candice Bergen and... Amazing. Yeah. It's available on Amazon Prime and anywhere that you rent movies.

Yes. Oh, great. Oh, good. But tell us... Yeah, I really don't like to talk about myself, though. Yeah, you're deflect... Yeah, but I want to know about you, and I don't like to talk about... This is a bad combination.

No, it's not good. So, but tell us about Lady of the Manor, because if you even watch, you know, just the trailer, you see, there's a lot of... of really fun elements that get kind of strung together. Christian and I were really always inspired by odd couple comedies. We loved Neil Simon, the original, but we loved Laurel and Hardy growing up. And we were just drawn to those movies. Frank Osmond, What About Bob and Plains Trains and Automobiles?

Those were always our favorites, Midnight Run. And so, like, that was, we knew we wanted that genre to concentrate on there. We felt like that was something we could tackle. And then we hadn't seen, we knew so many funny actresses, you know, like we were thinking, all these actresses we know that are so, and Melanie and Judy, of course, right at the top of the list. And we just thought we should write one for two women. I thought, who better to do that than two men? We got lucky in the casting.

And we, the ghost element is. kind of more of a backdrop. It really is more of just a buddy comedy. And of course, we didn't have the money for a lot of effects. And so at a certain point, it is hopefully just these two women who are at odds with each other and then having to team up and work together. But the backstory is that Judy's character died in the 1870s and is still living in this house, which Melanie Linsky is now a tour guide for.

She's kind of like a stoner, ne'er-do-well character. and it gets a job as a tour guide, and she's terrible at it. And Judy's character, The Ghost, it takes offense at how Melanie's portraying her. And so she starts bugging. She haunts her, but not in a scary way, more in a really annoying way, you know.

She doesn't leave her alone. And so then they have to team up together. It was so fun. How do you come up with the concept for that dynamic? Weed. We were stone. We were pretty stoned. And my brother and I love to just hang out and talk and throw around ideas.

And, you know, the next, and we record them. We'll record them if we latch on to something that we think might be something. And then the next day, of course, in the sober light of day, we start going through them. And, you know, 98% of the time we realize they're ridiculous and not in a good way. And this one was one that we just thought there might be something there. and we just, it continued to make us laugh. And we originally conceived it as like a, like kind of a comedic psycho. You know, if Norman Bates' mother weren't compelling him to do murderous things,

but rather just annoying him and we're kind of like, we would kind of interrupt dates and get in the way when he was trying to, you know, be on a date and with a woman. And so it was more from that angle. And then we worked on that a little. And there was no way around the tragic, It just felt too tragic that this guy's mother was dead. I don't know.

So we kind of morphed into this. Do you see yourself more as a person enjoying writing and directing and kind of being in that position? Or, you know, obviously there's not a shortage of acting roles. But I'm just kind of curious if you like that, you know, if you kind of like that hat. I love it. I love doing it. I love working with my brother. so we get to do that pretty regularly with the podcast.

We have something else we're trying to put together for the fall. Yeah, I'd love to do more. It's, as you know, it's a lot of work. I don't mean this. It's fun work. It's very, very fulfilling. But I remember the first movie I did after we directed. It felt like a vacation.

It felt I really appreciate just, you know, the ease of just doing one job. now. And I had so much more respect for every facet of the process. And so I am so glad I did it. I want to do more. But I love acting and getting to do that. So I don't know. I still want to keep doing that. Hopefully I get. My Ambialx breakdown is supported by Superpower. We all know the feeling of leaving a doctor's office and kind of feeling like we didn't get anything out of the experience that was useful. Maybe they're like, you're fine. Drink more water. There's no real data. There's no game plan.

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Head to superpower.com. Use the code break at checkout for $20 off your membership. And after you sign up, they'll ask, you heard about them, make sure to mention my ambiolics breakdown to help support the show. We had Lamarne on the show, everybody, and he told a story about you on New Girl, which, I mean, just cracked me up. Basically, you know, the short version is that he said you were the funniest person on that stage. That's nice. And he described it as that, you know, you would basically just not ever deliver your lines.

Okay. This is going to, this sound, yes. Is this slanderous? No, it just sounds, as an actor, knows that this is, this sounds very unprofessional. And I, I would do a take where I would, I would do the lines. It wasn't like I refused to say, I just loved, I loved playing with those guys so much that, I think the truth is more like I would go out of my way to, to find stuff to, to, to, to, do with them, to improvise stuff to do with them, um, when it probably, when it wasn't going to make the cut, you know, it wasn't like story stuff. He would say that like, for example, you would have

to call him Winston. Oh, yeah. I thought it was funny to, yeah, not get his name. I like the, I think it's fine. To not get his name right and to, to, and to get it just slightly wrong. But, but with conviction, sometimes I'll get people's name with conviction. I'll say, have you, do you ever do that, like, the, the entirely wrong name. No, I actually avoid using people's names for this reason. Even people that I am certain, there's no way that I'm getting their name wrong. I have that that shred of doubt and I'd rather just not say anything. Well, I probably should have more of that. I would be wise to have more of that, but I have such, I like saying people's names, you know, I like feeling, I don't know, like even if it's a superficial connection, I like feeling personally connected. And so, in fact,

one of them, when we directed the movie, we had a great team and our producer was saying, we were so excited, we just couldn't believe that all these people were, I'm sure you know this, you know this feeling now, that everyone was showing up for this thing that you wrote. You came up with one night when you were on edibles, you know, that like a year ago and you're, you know, hanging out and now all these people are there for it to see this thing through and so they said I remember the producer saying do you want are you guys okay you want anything before we start shooting and do you have any requests you know and I said I'd always fan it because every time I'm on a set I always wish everyone at people had name tags yes you know it wouldn't that be like

the fantasy of and so I said it's really not that hard to make happen though I know and so I know and so I said that I said look everything's great I hate to if I can request you anything, though, it would be... So I requested that everybody have name tags, and we got it, we're on it. They said, you know, very dutifully, we're going to do it. And so the first day, we show up and

everybody had name tags, but they were those lanyard name tags. And it was only one side that said the name. And yes, and of course they all flipped around, and so I'm doing... And they're right at chest level. To even look at it is potentially problematic.

A hundred percent. 100%. Yeah. People must have not having a hard time with Myam. That's such a unique. They have a very hard time with it. For real? Yes. People say, why do you spell it like that? It's like, because that's how they spell them. So many people think that I should spell my name, M-Y-I-M. Oh, yeah. Okay. That makes sense. But my name is a, it's Hebrew for the word water. And so in any prayer book for the last several thousand years, if you're going to, well, I guess not a thousand, but. Since prayer books have been transliterated into English, the word maim, which is water, has been translated as being spelled M-A-Y-I-M. So every prayer book says, like that's just... Mayam, it's a pretty name.

Thank you. How did your parents come... How did they come up with it? So my grandmother's name was Mariam. That's like Miriam. And so the R was hard to pronounce because the Hebrew-Yiddish R is actually, it's got like a little bit of a... So they just would call her my yam. Instead of Mariam, they'd call her my yam.

And my parents were hippies, and it was 1975, and the name means water. Oh, that's cool. Yeah, and so they gave me that name, and there you have it. But people often tell me that it's spelled wrong. Two Jewish people, when you go to Israel, do they just call you water? Sometimes, I mean, people used to call me toilet water in elementary school. That wasn't positive. No, and it's terrible.

And it's pretty bad. In Israel, it's not a name, meaning it's an odd, like, it's like, and Israelis are historically very direct. Like, ma, ma, yes, I like that. Why are you, that's actually an LL security agent, you know, because they kind of grill you before you get on the plane. That's what he said to me, why this is your name? Oh, that's funny. That's funny. I like that they do that. You must feel so secure getting on the plane.

They ask where you went to synagogue. Do you speak Hebrew? Why don't you speak Hebrew? It's very, very elaborate. You have a very interesting thing that you talked about on armchair expert. Do you talk about this event that happened to you? We don't have to. Yeah. I mean, I hadn't. Yeah. You had a very, very traumatic experience that also, and again, we don't, I don't want to talk about anything that you're not comfortable with, but I think there's something that's interesting about, you know, hearing about this story as you spoke about it with. with Dax and on armchair expert is like things happen when you're a human and for those of us who happen to be public people or someone that people are interested in it means a lot more it becomes a lot more you had a very significant traumatic experience that was revealed because of who you are You know, meaning it literally might not have been something people learned about if you hadn't been you. Well, yeah, it's also probably wouldn't have happened had I not been known by these people, certainly.

To nutshell it, and I hate to do that because people will be like, wait, I want to, you know, I don't know, it just brings up more questions. No, for sure. You can listen to it on Dax's show, but it was, these guys spotted me at a bar and they, and I, and I, and I, and, long, long story short, I was drugged. You were given a substance without your knowledge that changed the course of your evening, as it were. I think it was PCPs, but the way it came to happen, I know it sounds ludicrous that I should put myself in that position. And looking back, it was, and obviously there are things I wouldn't have done, but I was so, it was a time of my life where I was very, well, I was wanting every, you can definitely relate to this. I was wanting everything to be normal and to not be, I was wanting.

wanting to walk into a bar and to just meet people on neutral terms and not have this thing be present, which is, and not to make myself sound like, you know, George Clooney or anything, but like, you know how it is when you're in a, certainly a town outside L.A. or New York, one of the major cities, you know, people get, I can sound like such a douchebag, but people get, you know, people get excited and they have a response to it. And not necessarily positive. but they have a reaction to it. And so these guys, I think they felt slighted that I'd been there a couple of nights earlier with the actor Steve Bouchemey who gets it, you know, everyone reckoning. He is one of the most recognizable faces ever. And so it was, they basically, we were in this local bar and they moved us to kind of like a back room. And I think these guys felt, I don't know what their motivation was, but they approached me. When they approached me, they felt they had kind of combative and they felt slighted and they felt like we had disrespected them by, I don't know why.

But I am still, but working on it, a real people pleaser, you know, and I just wanted things. I didn't want them to, they were saying things like, oh, Mr. Hollywood, you know. And I said, oh, I'm just like you. And I was buying them drinks and stuff. And anyway, there's no excuse. I got in, I should not, I should not have put myself in the situation. but I ended up smoking what I thought was weed from a bong and it was I think it was PCP. I think it was laced with something.

I've told the story to people in private security since then and they're like, oh, it was definitely, this is something that apparently has, they were familiar with this type of thing. And so I was like, really, my whole body shut down and they were driving me around. And I think they were wanting to film me in some compromising position, you know, But I thought they were going to kill me. I mean, it was really... How long did this... How long was this experience?

It went on from... I remember because I was with it... We had just gotten off of work. It was my last night in town, in this town in Michigan, and it was probably from... We got there kind of late, maybe 11 or 12, and I walked into the bar, and this was back when...

To deal with the oddness of people, you know, just the strange social change, and I would take two shows. shots of whiskey right when I got there just to kind of deal with the weirdness. Not advocating for that. It was obviously at the time was a big mistake. And I definitely don't drink like that anymore. I just can't.

My body's, you know, I'm old now. But you're a man. I've become a man. And so it was about 11, 11 or 12. And then the bars close at 2. And so these guys proposed going to a secondary location. secondary location, yeah, and so whatever, that's how it happened. But when I jumped out, I still...

So did you jump out of the car at like 3 a.m? 6 a.m.? Yeah. No, I'm sorry. No, no, no. It was about 3 a.m. Okay, got it. I remember because, you know, from a thing like that, you, it's weird. I remember, strange things, I couldn't tell you what they look like. Yeah, well, yes.

I could never pick them out of a lineup, you know, but I remember weird details. Like, for example, I remember, I remember after I jumped to, out the car, you know, because when you jump out of a moving car, as I now know, I didn't know this about you. I've only seen it in the movies. Yes. When Spider-Man lands on his two feet. But I, um, no, you take a hard roll.

You roll. And so the car ran over my leg. And so when I stood up, my, my leg was like, you know, really bent in a crazy position like, like this. And, and I remember looking down and I remember this thought, which was, well, two things. I remember thinking, I wonder if I broke my phone. which would be unfortunate. And even weirder, I wonder if I saw blood pooling out of the sides of my knee

and it was a little tattered, my jeans, these jeans that I had that I, you know, there's that pair of jeans that you just wear all the time. And I remember thinking, what a bummer I, which is weird to me because I. No, I had a significant car accident and the first thing I thought was I'm bleeding all over this dress and the dress is on loan. That's literally... They're not funny. What speed are you going?

It was about 30, 30. It wasn't like, we were not speeding. I remember thinking they were going to stop it. I remember my plan was they were going to stop at a red light. There was a red light and I was just going to get out and make a run for it or make a crawl for it. Because I think I would have been, I don't know. I wasn't capable of dying. I remember not being capable of dying numbers.

I remember thinking that. And so this felt like the only... way out to jump out of the car. But they went right through the red lights, you know, so they were definitely, and the scariest part was when they were trying to calm me down, you know, it's okay. They passed my hotel. And so I, that's when I knew when they were trying to, like, mollify me. That's when I knew they were, that was really, there was real impending danger. And that's why I decided to jump out. And this cat, weirdly enough, I saw headlights. There was no cars around, but I saw these headlights and it happened to be a cab.

And I kind of shuffled my way to the cab on this bloody leg. And when I got in, my energy must have been wild, you know, because he right away. You were in shock also. Yeah, but I remember feeling like, I do remember this feeling such relief, like joy almost. Yeah, yeah, but I'm saying clinically you are in shock, meaning you're operating on a completely different plane of existence at that point. Totally. Yeah. Yeah, just really phonetic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So did he take you to the hospital? No, no. He wouldn't drive me anywhere.

Good out of my key wanted me. Yeah, well, you probably looked like a person who was bloody and out of his. I wouldn't want me. Yeah, right. And so I, the two of the, two of the PAs that I was with came up to the driver's side door. And I could tell by their reaction that they weren't in on it with these other. other locals. And so I just walked back to my hotel and I woke up with just in more pain than I'd ever been my throbbing leg. And it was, you know, swollen. It was a wild. Yeah, what was the, I mean, what was the injury? Like, you didn't break anything, thank God. No, no. And the doctor,

I told him what happened, you know, and he thought it was because I had been, I was, I was inebriated, you know, and so I was my body. I wasn't when you're, I wasn't, I wasn't, I wasn't tensing up. And so fortunately, I didn't break anything, but there were just massive contusions. And, you know, I didn't, what I failed to do was the proper physical therapy afterwards. So my leg is still quite numb. Right. And it's just like a reminder of scars. It was a reminder of and emotion scars. Well, I was going to say, did you, like, I'm just curious. Like, did you like, oh, I better go into therapy or like, were you a therapy person? No. No. No. I have since, become. Have you done EMDR?

No, no. I'm curious about it. Well, yeah, EMDR. Well, just the reason I'm asking is for people who do EMDR, they, you know, it's a very, it's like a, it's a regulated, you know, kind of treatment for trauma. But my mom did EMDR. And what, what she said is that like, things that were happening at the time of a traumatic event that she hadn't even registered at the time, like consciously. Oh, I bet. Would all of a sudden, like, come into focus? The way she described it, she said it was like,

she'd be like, you know, focused on an event and you're awake. You're working with a, you know, a therapist who's been trained in all these methods and you have to, like, do things to prepare and blah, blah, blah. But she said it was like, it was like a Zoom lens that just started, like, pulling back. And she said, like, all of a sudden there were like, she could, like, look around the room that, like, things happened. She's, I mean, a lot of people report this. Anyway, I was just curious because I have not done EMDR hoping to try.

try it this summer. But yeah, you typically choose kind of like one event or kind of class of event that you then focus on and they kind of like take you there conceptually. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, but I was just wondering. Would your event be the accident you were in? That's a great question. I wish that was the one. No, there's a lot of there's a lot of things that I'd be interested in focusing on, let's say, in this arena. You know... To my understanding, I'm not... It's one at a time, usually.

Right. Okay. Right. Well, my mom had to literally, like, come up with, like, for her therapy. Like, that was part of the prep is, like, you come up with a list of things. I mean, for me and my car accident, it's so interesting. I've never... I mean, it's kind of odd.

I've never thought of kind of, like, doing work on it just because, like, all the work I've done since then feels like it's on it. What I wanted to ask is, how many years from then, like, did you get into therapy? Well, I was in therapy shortly after that, but about, I was focusing on something else. Got it. Right. And it was, I just, for whatever reason, I mean, I'm embarrassed to admit this. I never thought to address that. I just thought, well, I survived. That happened, right. That happened. That happened. It was all. That happened. But I, you know, And I'm sure this is common of an incident like that where you want to just move on. You so badly want to.

Oh, who wants to think about that, right? I mean, look, and the fact is, and, you know, the reason I'm kind of, you know, really interested in kind of how you're presenting it is I think the way a lot of people experience a lot of things. Like, that happened. And if I just think about it more, it's just going to make it worse. Like, I don't want to think all those things. Yes, I know.

Because none of us were raised with the concept of like, oh, you actually hold negative experiences in your body and in your, and they impact your entire life without you even knowing it. So I think it's totally accurate that you'd be like, well, that happened and I seem fine. And indeed, you probably were fine. But yes, all it takes is fine enough to function. Right, exactly. Yeah. Well, that's what I love about, I've been getting for the last year really into meditation. That's what I love about. I have this 10, it's called 10% happier app that Dan Harris started. And they, I've been retraining myself to focus on things like that and to not negate those feelings, those when they come up and those thoughts, but to consider them and to kind

of feel them. It's been a tremendous help. To your point, it's exactly what you said, which is to kind of address it head on. So you're not burying it. I remember my dad always used to talk about being stoic. You know, he was, that stoicism, which I think he may have gotten wrong. As bright as he is, but I think it can be really unhealthy to, I mean, I now know it can be unhealthy to just bury things. And so, yeah, I've, I've loved exploring things like this trauma. And I truly don't have any problem talking about it, but it's interesting. For so long I did, I was so afraid of it ever getting out. And I had so much shame about, about it, I suppose. So, so it's weird. Even when Dax brought it up, I, I remember kind of tensing up and, um,

And then I said it. And it was out there. And my life, the world didn't change. I just felt kind of like, oh, okay, this is not as nearly as bad as I'd been thinking it would be. Well, I really appreciate you kind of letting us go there. Again, I was not looking for gory details. Well, you can hear him on Dax's show. Yeah.

Make sure to tune in. It's funny that you mentioned my Dax's show and me hearing about this thing. And I felt like I just kind of like was retreading. And I apologize if I'm kind of going over the same stuff. and not doing it as completely. But it really is long. I mean, I told me, I talked to him for three and a half hours, you know. But it's funny because I had Bobby Moynihan on my life is short.

And my brother's always giving me shit about just rehashing things that I've heard on other podcasts. And I did, that's exactly what I did. I'm not saying you did that, but that's exactly what I did with Bobby. I had just listened to your podcast with him. Oh, we had such a good time with him. Oh, it was great. I loved it. And also, you know, you had such a sensitive touch. The way you were, you extracted some of these, you know, really personal things from him about, I thought it was so interesting

about his, how he dealt with his parents' death. And it was such sensitive stuff. And you had such a light, compassionate touch. And, but I, so much of what I was saying, Bobby kept saying, yes, how do you know this? Where did you hear this? And I felt so embarrassed. I was like, We had Matthew McConaughey on. I don't know if you listen to that one. Oh, no. I recommend interviewing him any day of the week. Jonathan, what was the first thing I asked Matthew McConaughey?

The first thing my mom says is, do you know who I am? And he kind of pauses and looks and he's like, no. That's awesome. What compelled you to ask him that? No, I didn't. Okay, I shouldn't have asked Jonathan to tell that story. I didn't ask it like. I think she said, do you have any idea who I am?

Like, why are you here? If it makes you feel better, I know for a fact, he didn't even say it out loud. I just knew he didn't know that I was an actor. I think he was just really, I mean, not to belittle both of our shows, but I think he was really making the rounds with that book. Green lights. Did you hear, do you listen to the book? No, I read it with my eyeballs. I love.

Oh, man. The audio version is. I mean, I'm sure that's like a whole, that's a trip. He's got the best. Oh, he's got the best voice. Well, he does have a very good voice. I mean, man, the way he tells those stories. It's so green light.

It's so... That's the one thing I ever did on SNL was an impression of him. And I felt so nervous going in and so insecure about it because it really wasn't one I felt I felt was a strong one for me. But that's what Lauren wanted to see. He was like, that's the one they wanted to see. And I talked to Bobby about this because Bobby was in the same sketch. And he was... And everyone's...

And so all these people are doing... and outperformers are doing McConaughey. And I had one, two lines as him. And it was such a wild, I was so in my head about it. I've done plays and stuff. And I just thought like, that's one thing, you know? But you know that feeling when you only have like one or two lines when it's, the stakes are that much higher for some reason?

Like you think that much more about the few words that you have to say. Oh, it was terrifying. Wait, what did you say? Remind this. I don't remember. But it was, but, you know, the impression. The only, the way I've been able to do it is that it's got to be really intimate, you know, because he is, I know him, there's something about him that's like, hey, man.

That's right. That's what I like about them high school girls, man. And he's very like, all right, all right, all right. He's that guy, he's got, but it's got to be kind of like, kind of seductive, like a little bit in the ear. Can you say my name? Can you just say my name like that? Mine, mine. That's right, man.

All right. You're listening to mine. I got chills. I do not know who you are. I love that he said that. I absolutely don't, but I think you're fantastic. All right, I'll right. Keep going on that.

Say that, you know, you don't look at all recognizable. Just keep going. Jonathan will send you a script of the things he's like, I think I know you. I may know you from a dream. You came to me in a dream. I was floating down the Amazon and my birthday suit. And I saw you floating there like an Aztec warrior.

I don't know if that's wrong. Yeah. You, he was, he's better like this. And I had to project. You know, I'm on stage. So I had to do it and kind of like, and I just felt immediately horrible about it. And you think immediately, oh, I'm going to want another take on this. And it's like, well, sorry, Saturday night live.

Do you do other, I like impressions? Do you do other impressions? Oh, I love them. I love them. You know, for a long time I was doing, I proposed doing Sam Rockwell because Sam was somebody that I'm so, for many reasons. You have to really know what Sam Rockwell sounds like, though. Well, he's, yeah, you will ask.

Sam a question. I mean, I don't know. I don't have a specific. Hey, hey, hey, man. Jonathan, hey, man. What's, what's going on? What's going on? What, uh, what are you doing today, Sam?

Hey, man. I'm going to the store, man. I'm getting a, uh, I got the play tonight. So I'm taking it easy. My, my fucking throat is killing me, man. I had a matinee yesterday, so I'm taking it easy. I'm going to get some chicken soup. You know, they got this bone broth on 2nd Avenue.

It's fucking awesome. They make it with pork bones. Fucking awesome. Sam, it was a good friend of my, but before he was known to everyone, you know, it was one I couldn't do. There's some that, you know, I was so glad for many reasons that he became.

Oh, I love him. But selfishly, I'm like, well, good, now I can try to out. my salmon purse. And you do a good Keanu Reeves, I've heard. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, he's very earnest. Yeah.

Everything is, I don't know. It's this. What's that line he said? I used to do that line in John Wick. Are you? People are saying I'm back. Yeah, I'm guessing I'm back.

Everything is very earnest and sincere. God, I love him. He's just the best. It seems like there's level of confusion. A little bit, yeah, but befuddled, maybe. But, you know, but then convicted. I have a very specific Keanu Reeves connection because I've never seen Bill and Ted's

excellent adventure. I mean, I remember when they came out. My parents were strict in weird ways, and I wouldn't be surprised. Oh, really? Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised if that was like something I wasn't allowed to see. But in any event, Keanu Reeves was in the Paula Abdul video for Rush. and it is a very beautifully shot video and I'm a Paul Abdul fan

and it's literally like one of those things where you, the way that they shot this video like he, I mean he's like an Adonis like he's this beautiful beautiful man and I remember the like I would cry I would watch it and cry because he was so attractive and so weren't you you must have been

he was as an actor you must have wanted to see more of him You must have been like wanted to see. So then the Matrix came out however many years later. And I was like, this is like my movie. Like this is. And so it was like this person who I loved so much is now in this movie like articulating like all these like deep for me like very deep things that I, you know, resonate so much with. Anyway.

Oh, yeah. That's my cannery story. Well, you were your parents? Was it R rate? Was it because it? Yeah. I couldn't see. I couldn't see.

Me too. Yeah. I couldn't see R rated. and I had an older brother which seemed, he really just seemed to exist so my father could show me how different girls and boys are. Meaning like, boys can see this

and boys can stay out and boys can do this. But yeah, very old school. My dad, he passed away seven years ago, but you know, like picture Al Pacino. That was my dad. Like he went to school with Al Pacino. They all talked like that when you're from the South Bronx.

And very, yeah, like I was sent to, bed if like something came on TV that was like considered too racy and yeah. Wow. Wow. So do you remember the first kind of taboo movie you saw like the? Yeah. My father's parents, my grandparents had moved to Florida, which is what Jews do. And they took me to see Dr. Detroit.

And like it was like a terrible Dan Aykroyd movie. And there was. Oh my God. There were topless women. And I was like, what? Rests. I was like eight. And my parents were like.

Like you took them to see what? Oh, that's so funny. And like a bag of candy, like a bag of, you know, those gummy Coke bottles and like a soda. Yes, I remember those, the wax ones. Things that did not happen. Anyway, I think that I never went to stay with my grandparents again unsupervised. Oh, my God. Well, I remember my first one was stand by me already.

My parents were like, you should maybe watch this because it's, you know, kids my age. And I think they were willing to, yeah, there were a couple bad words. isn't it? Yeah, I feel like National Lampoon's vacation was one also like that I remember seeing Plains Trans and Automobiles was our I didn't know see that like I got a whole list of things I wasn't allowed to see Top Gunn's. Oh yeah

I haven't seen Top Gunn I had never seen Ferris Bueller's Day Off I recently saw that though there's like I've never seen Flash Dance I wasn't allowed to see that I haven't either we have a question on our show we have like a lightning round I'm so I hope you can do it

Yes, I am going to come play. We have a lightning round too, which we'll do in a second. What's your lightning round? One of our questions is, is there a movie? What's a movie that you're embarrassed to admit you haven't seen? Oh, I got so many. I know, I know. That being said, it is our rapid fire breakdown style with Justin Long.

What was your mother right about? Right about. What was she wrong about? Maybe we should start there. Well, what was she right about? Like, recently. Just in general. Like, this is not a hard question, friend.

Oh, about life? about like, oh, like advice she gave me. I'm sorry. She's been right, what was she right about? She was right about, um, go ahead. Well, certain, you know, I always used to get, she'd, she was often right about some red flags in relationships. Oh. And I, I, she was, she was right about, um, the business at the acting, show business being, um, challenging for the psyche and the ego.

And, um, she was definitely right about that. And gosh, you'd be right about what a joy it is to cook. I've recently discovered that. Okay, here comes another hard one. What was your father right about? He was, let's see, my father was right about going to as many museums as possible, learning as much about history whenever you travel. That's also something that I have grown to appreciate little,

later in life. He was, yeah, he's been right about a lot. My dad was a very attentive father. I got very lucky, you know, like he would go on camping Boy Scout trips with us and stuff. And he wasn't as crazy about sports and stuff, but he always came to the games. Well, he was a Latin philosophy professor, you know. Yeah, yeah. Okay, location that promotes your best mental health.

I have a place in Massachusetts in the Berkshires. on a lake. And so being on a lake, being on fishing or just sitting on a dock at the bay. Sitting on the dock of the bay. Yeah, just sitting, looking out at this lake. Nice. Do you have a mantra? If you don't, what would it be if you did have one? Oh, wow. Yeah, man, these are good. These are challenging. It would be, well, you know, the reason we called our show, life is short is because it's it's obviously a hilarious pun but just with just and long um but i i like it's something that i like reminding saying out loud and i like the reminder that life is short and um so maybe that okay maybe that to appreciate it just to enjoy it enjoy it life who's been your best

spiritual teacher my favorite meditation teacher is joseph goldstein uh and um I'm often inspired. I'm easily inspired. Mark Epstein, I just read a great book by Mark Epstein, going to pieces without falling apart. He's a guest guest on our podcast coming up. My parents have been really inspired. My grandma, though, if I had to say my grandma hit a level of fuck it about life that was pretty inspiring. I'm sorry.

No, that's also a good mantra. This is fuck it. Yeah, fuck it. Yeah, who said that? It's a little Ferris Bueller. Ferris Bueller is a good spiritual advisor. I truly, I mean, all of his move, John Hughes was, yeah, if I had to follow somebody, I'd follow him. Moment of Best Intuition.

It was a personal one. It was to go and see about a girl. Okay. It's a very Matthew McCona hay of you. I was going to say, do you want to know what Matthew McCona Hay said? I said to him, I said to him, like, what's been in your moment of best intuition? He was very quiet. And then he was like, it was out of the corner of my eye.

I saw something moving. It was, and then he like named a color. It was crimson. And it was her. It was his woman walking across, you know, his plane of perspective. No, no, she wasn't walking. She was just gliding. She was gliding right off the ground.

She's levitating, man, on this, on this force field, this energy that I, the likes of which I never felt. Okay. Last question. Who are you most competitive with? Leslie Jordan. No, sorry. I would say competitive. That's a good question.

I used to be much more competitive, I think, than I am now. But I think it's whoever I'm playing Monopoly with. For some reason, whenever I still regress back to like, man, I used to throw, I get weirdly competitive with Monopoly. And so in that case, it would be my girlfriend recently that I played with. but I am rarely competitive. And now I've gotten to a point of, fuck it, maybe inspired by my grandma where I truly just think, well, it wasn't meant to be.

I've gotten really good at that. It's been really nice talking to you and thank you so much. This was really, really fun. Likewise. What a treat. Yeah. And thank you for being some nice. And I can't wait to talk to you more.

I wonder if he has any like residual emotional hesitancy or like, like sort of sparks of concern when he meets people in public. Yeah, he mentioned that a little bit. And I mean, it's such an unusual, you know, kind of story and experience. I really appreciated how honest he was about like how much he kind of like didn't think he had to do anything about it, you know? And it's true. Like, you know, I come from this like, go to therapy, like process it, do it, you know?

And for most people, like, that's not the first thing people go to. And I think there is, there's that fear of rehashing it and I just need to get over it and like I shouldn't be upset about it. And I just, it's very, very interesting to me how he how he talked about it. Another thing also like, there's something about funny actor energy that I don't like you around. I don't like how you act. You don't like jokes. You don't like fun. No, there's some, I think it's.

What happens? I don't know. I laugh. You don't like laughing unless it's laughing at, with you unless you're the joke teller. No, I think in all seriousness, I think like Justin, he's a very, very, you know,

he's a very sweet guy. Like he's a, he's like a good guy. He's like a guy that if I, you know, got to work with him, it would be really fun and really awesome. But yeah, there's something about when I'm with people like that who like, you know, it's a lot of my life is like that personality and like working with, there's something about having you part of it that feels very like, stay out.

I'm just being honest. Again, hoarding all the fun for yourself. Jonathan, you can talk to doctors. You can talk to experts who want to talk about the brain, but no one who tells jokes. Anyway, I'm sure we can delve into that another time. If anyone wants to make a list of the people I am and I'm not allowed to talk to, they can do so at the Instagram at Bialik Breakdown.

We can also tell the story of how, I was wearing our MBB sweatshirt and I someone asked me, I was in a store and someone asked me, hey, what's that sweatshirt? Oh, it's a podcast I'm, you know, part of. And they're like, what's the name of the podcast? And I said, Miami Alex breakdown.

And they said, what? I said, my ambialx breakdown. And they said, is that English? From our breakdown to the one we hope you never have. We'll see you next time. It's my ambialics breakdown. She's going to break it down for you. She's got a neuroscience PhD or two.

One fiction, one. And now she's going to break down.